How To Deal With a High Maintenance Gold Digger

Woman?

Kanye West may have coined the term “gold digger.” However, the term and the meaning have been around

since the 1980s and is the theme of the hit film The Money Pit. Tom Hanks and Shelly Long play a couple

that attempts to renovate their recently purchased home.

In the beginning the couple is thrilled to be able to purchase a million dollar house at such a good price.

Only to become discouraged and frustrated once it begins to fall apart around them. The door rips off the

wall. The spiral staircases collapses.

The water that oozes from the faucet is filled with brown dirt. And the electrical system goes on the fritz,

sizzles, and causes the whole dang house to catch on fire. Of course, the house is analogous to a relationship,

especially one with a high maintenance woman.

A high maintenance gold digger woman is in constant need of

renovations and repairs.

In many situations, we are blinded by the beauty and glitz of a woman, only to move in and become discouraged

when the house/relationship begins to crumble all around us. Relationships with a high maintenance woman involve making constant renovations where you can get frustrated

by the ongoing delays and increasing costs of repairs.

Soon, the relationship becomes a money pit, where you make one repair, only to find ten other things that are still broken. In the end, that’s what a high maintenance, gold

digger woman is. She is someone who is broken and needs a lot of love, care, and attention to feel whole and complete. Besides, all relationships require some form of investment.

But trying to fix a high maintenance woman is like trying to renovate an abandoned high-rise building that is destined to implode. It will take you out, and everything else around it.

Remember, the high maintenance woman is looking for somebody dumb enough to invest in her. She secretly

knows that she isn’t very valuable. However, her goal is to trick you into believing that she is a pot of gold.

The high maintenance woman is all about maintaining an illusion.

The high maintenance woman never wants anyone to see how truly broken and alone she is. She craves love, yet she rejects it because it requires her to feel vulnerable and even weak.

Instead, she begins to adopt certain roles that will ensure that she will always be in control and in charge of her own destiny

and fate. The roles that people adopt in relationships are commonly called fantasy bonds. Dr. Robert Firestone

introduced the concept of the fantasy bond in his book, Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice.

He explains that people invest a great deal of their time and effort into playing roles to avoid the pitfalls and heartaches

that come with being in a real relationship. The fantasy bond is common amongst older married couples that refuse to acknowledge that the love and romance is gone. Instead, they play roles and pretend that they’re in a healthy and

loving relationship. The high maintenance woman on the other hand, has adopted this terrible relationship with

herself.

Throughout the years she developed a major alter ego that appears to be strong, independent, kind, and even loving. Unfortunately, you can’t put a fresh coat over crack paint, partly because

everything that is buried underneath will bleed through. A high maintenance woman will continue to cover up her insecurities by demanding more attention and validation by expecting

more money and gifts.

Tips to deal with a high maintenance, gold digger woman.

If you rewind back to spiritual and personal development 101, you know that the very first relationship that you have

is with yourself. Sadly, with many gold-digger high maintenance women, they’ve never really cultivated this

relationship. They lack a sense of inner security and belongingness.

They look for other people and relationships to give them things that they can only find within themselves. Yes, these women are constantly hard to please. But when you appease them and succumb to their needs, you’re reinforcing many

deep-seated issues that they need to face, alone.

If you’re dating a high maintenance woman, you need to assess the damage.

Then, you need to be honest and ask yourself how much time and money you’re willing to put into her. You don’t

want to invest in a depreciating asset. Yet, at the same time, you don’t want to walk away because you have

already invested so much attention and maybe you’re not ready to give up on the finished product.

If you truly want to get through to a high maintenance woman, you’ll need to understand that her persona needs to be smashed to smithereens like a building

being whacked by a wrecking ball. She needs to shatter her insecurities and fear of vulnerability like

fallen debris.

Most importantly, she will need to build a solid foundation to build from. She will need you to be her rock, her sense of security. She will need you to be

strong, so she can be weak and vulnerable. This way, she will be able to grow and appreciate into the

woman she was destined to be.

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