Vuolume 6 Clarissa

7/31/2019 Vuolume 6 Clarissa

http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/vuolume-6-clarissa 1/202

CLARISSAHARLOWE

orthe

HISTORYOFAYOUNGLADY

NineVolumesVolumeVI.

CONTENTSOFVOLUMEVI

LETTERI.II.LovelacetoBelford.--HisconditionalpromisetoTomlinsoninthelady'sfavour.Hispleasandargumentsontheirpresentsituation,andonhisdarlingandhitherto-baffledviews.Hiswhimsicalcontestwithhisconscience.Hislatestadieutoit.Hisstrangelevity,whichhecallsgravity,onthedeathofBelford'suncle.

LETTERIII.IV.Fromthesame.--Shefavourshimwithameetinginthegarden.Hercomposure.Herconversationgreatandnoble.Butwillnotdetermineanythinginhis

favour.Itishoweverevident,hesays,thatshehasstillsometendernessforhim.Hisreasons.Anaffectingscenebetweenthem.Heringenuousnessandopennessofheart.Sheresolvestogotochurch;butwillnotsufferhimtoaccompanyherthither.HiswhimsicaldebatewiththeGodofLove,whomheintroducedaspleadingforthelady.

LETTERV.VI.VII.Fromthesame.--Hehasgotthewished-forletterfromMissHowe.--Informshimofthemannerofobtainingit.--Hisremarksuponit.Observationsonfemalefriendships.ComparisonbetweenClarissaandMissHowe.

LETTERVIII.Fromthesame.--Anotherconversationwiththelady.Hisplausibleargumentstore-obtain

herfavourineffectual.Hispridepiqued.Hisrevengeincited.Newargumentsinfavourofhiswickedprospects.Hisnoticethatalicenseisactuallyobtained.

LETTERIX.X.Fromthesame.--Copyofthelicense;withhisobservationsuponit.Hisschemeforannualmarriages.HeispreparingwithLadyBettyandMissMontaguetowaituponClarissa.Whothesepretendedladiesare.Howdressed.Theygivethemselvesairsofquality.Humourouslyinstructsthemhowtoactuptheirassumedcharacters.

LETTERXI.XII.LovelacetoBelford.--Oncemoreisthecharmerofhissoulinheroldlodgings.Briefaccount

ofthehorridimposture.Steelshisheartbyrevengefulrecollections.Heragonizingapprehensions.Temporarydistraction.Isreadytofallintofits.Butallherdistress,allherprayers,herinnocence,hervirtue,cannotsaveherfromthemostvillanousoutrage.

LETTERXIII.BelfordtoLovelace.--Vehementlyinveighsagainsthim.Grievesforthelady.Isnowconvincedthattheremustbeaworldafterthistodojusticetoinjuredmerit.Beseecheshim,ifhebeaman,andnotadevil,todoallthepoorjusticenowinhispower.



LETTERXIV.LovelacetoBelford.--Regretsthatheeverattemptedher.Aimsatextenuation.Doeshenotseethathehasjourneyedontothisstage,withonedeterminedpointinviewfromthefirst?Sheisatpresentstupified,hesays.

LETTERXV.Fromthesame.--Thelady'saffectingbehaviourinherdelirium.Heownsthatarthasbeenusedtoher.Beginstofeelremorse.

LETTERXVI.Fromthesame.--Theladywritesuponscrapsofpaper,whichshetears,andthrowsunderthetable.Copiesoftenoftheseramblingpapers;andofalettertohimmostaffectinglyincoherent.Heattemptsfarthertoextenuatehisvillany.Triestoresumehisusuallevity;andformsaschemetodecoythepeopleatHampsteadtotheinfamouswoman'sintown.Theladyseemstoberecovering.

LETTERXVII.Fromthesame.--Sheattemptstogetawayinhisabsence.IspreventedbytheodiousSinclair.Heexultsinthehopeoflookingherintoconfusionwhenheseesher.IstoldbyDorcasthatsheiscomingintothedining-roomtofindhimout.

LETTERXVIII.Fromthesame.--Ahighsceneofherexalted,andofhisdepressed,behaviour.Offerstomakeheramendsbymatrimony.Shetreatshisofferwithcontempt.AfraidBelfordplayshimfalse.

LETTERXIX.Fromthesame.--Wisheshehadneverseenher.Withallthewomenhehadknowntillnow,itwasoncesubdued,andalwayssubdued.Hismiserabledejection.Hisremorse.Sheattemptstoescape.Amobraised.Hisquickinventiontopacifyit.Outofconceitwithhimselfandhiscontrivances.

LETTERXX.XXI.LovelacetoBelford.--LordM.veryill.HispresencenecessaryatM.Hall.PutsDorcasupon

ingratiatingherselfwithherlady.--Here-urgesmarriagetoher.Sheabsolutely,fromthemostnoblemotives,rejectshim.

LETTERXXII.Fromthesame.--Reflectsuponhimself.Itcosts,hesays,morepaintobewickedthantobegood.Thelady'ssolemnexpostulationwithhim.Extolshergreatnessofsoul.Dorcascomingintofavourwithher.Heisalarmedbyanotherattemptoftheladytogetoff.Sheisinagoniesatbeingprevented.Hetriedtointimidateher.Dorcaspleadsforher.Onthepointofdrawinghisswordagainsthimself.Theoccasion.

LETTERXXIII.Fromthesame.--Cannotyetpersuadehimselfbuttheladywillbehis.Reasonsforhis

opinion.OpenshishearttoBelford,astohisintentionsbyher.Mortifiedthatsherefuseshishonestvows.Herviolationbutnotional.Hertriumphgreaterthanhersufferings.Herwillunviolated.Heisabetterman,hesays,thanmostrakes;andwhy.

LETTERXXIV.XXV.Fromthesame.--TheladygivesapromissorynotetoDorcas,toinducehertofurtherherescape.--Afairtrialofskillnow,hesays.AconversationbetweenthevileDorcasandherlady:inwhichsheengagesherlady'spity.Thebondsofwickednessstrongerthanthetiesofvirtue.Observationson



thatsubject.

LETTERXXVI.XXVII.XXVIII.Fromthesame.--Anewcontrivancetoadvantageofthelady'sintendedescape.--AletterfromTomlinson.Intentofit.--Hegoesouttogiveopportunityfortheladytoattemptanescape.Hisdesignsfrustrated.

LETTERXXIX.Fromthesame.--Aninterestingconversationbetweentheladyandhim.Noconcessioninhisfavour.Byhissoul,heswears,thisdeargirlgivesthelietoalltheirrakishmaxims.Hehaslaidallthesexunderobligationtohim;andwhy.

LETTERXXX.LovelacetoBelford.--LordM.inextremedanger.Thefamilydesirehispresence.HeinterceptsasevereletterfromMissHowetoherfriend.Copyofit.

LETTERXXXI.Fromthesame.--Thelady,suspectingDorcas,triestoprevailuponhimtogiveherherliberty.Shedisclaimsvengeance,andaffectinglytellshimallherfutureviews.Denied,sheoncemoreattemptsanescape.Prevented,andterrifiedwithapprehensionsofinstantdishonour,sheisobligedtomakesomeconcession.

LETTERXXXII.Fromthesame.--Accusesherofexplainingawayherconcession.Madedesperate,heseeksoccasiontoquarrelwithher.Sheexertsaspiritwhichoveraweshim.Heisridiculedbytheinfamouscopartnership.CallstoBelfordtohelpagayhearttoalittleofhisdismal,ontheexpecteddeathofLordM.

LETTERXXXIII.Fromthesame.--AnothermessagefromM.Hall,toengagehimtogodownthenextmorning.

LETTERXXXIV.XXXV.Fromthesame.--Thewomen'sinstigations.Hisfartherschemesagainstthelady.What,heasks,istheinjurywhichachurch-ritewillnotatanytimerepair?

LETTERXXXVI.Fromthesame.--Himself,themother,hernymphs,allassembledwithintenttoexecutehisdetestablepurposes.Hergloriousbehaviourontheoccasion.Heexecrates,detests,despiseshimself;andadmireshermorethanever.ObligedtosetoutearlythatmorningforM.Hall,hewillpressherwithletterstomeethimnextThursday,heruncle'sbirthday,atthealtar.

LETTERXXXVII.XXXVIII.XXXIX.LovelacetoClarissa,fromM.Hall.--Urgingheraccordingly,(thelicenseinherhands,)bythemostengagingpleasandarguments.

LETTERXL.LovelacetoBelford.--Begshewillwaitonthelady,andinducehertowritebutfourwordsto

him,signifyingthechurchandtheday.Isnowresolvedonwedlock.Curseshisplotsandcontrivances;whichallend,hesays,inonegrandplotuponhimself.

LETTERXLI.BelfordtoLovelace.Inanswer.--Refusestoundertakeforhim,unlesshecanbesureofhishonour.Whyhedoubtsit.

LETTERXLII.Lovelace.Inreply.--Curseshimforscrupulousness.Isinearnesttomarry.Afteronemore



letterofentreatytoher,ifshekeepsullensilence,shemusttaketheconsequence.

LETTERXLIII.LovelacetoClarissa.--Oncemoreearnestlyentreatshertomeethimatthealtar.Nottobeforbiddencoming,hewilltakeforleavetocome.

LETTERXLIV.LovelacetoPatrickM'Donald.--Orderinghimtovisitthelady,andinstructinghimwhattosay,andhowtobehavetoher.

LETTERXLV.Tothesame,asCaptainTomlinson.--Calculatedtobeshowntothelady,asinconfidence.

LETTERXLVI.M'DonaldtoLovelace.--Goestoattendtheladyaccordingtodirection.Findsthehouseinanuproar;andtheladyescaped.

LETTERXLVII.MowbraytoLovelace.--Withthesamenews.

LETTERXLVIII.BelfordtoLovelace.--Ampleparticularsofthelady'sescape.Makesseriousreflectionsonthedistressshemustbein;andonhis(Lovelace's)ungratefulusageofher.

Whathetakesthesumofreligion.LETTERXLIX.LovelacetoBelford.--Runsintoaffectedlevityandridicule,yetatlastownsallhisgayetybutcounterfeit.Regretshisbasenesstothelady.Inveighsagainstthewomenfortheirinstigations.Willstillmarryher,ifshecanbefoundout.Onemisfortuneseldomcomesalone;LordM.isrecovering.Hehadbespokenmourningforhim.

LETTERL.ClarissatoMissHowe.--Writeswithincoherence,toinquireafterherhealth.Letsherknowwhithertodirecttoher.Butforgets,inherrambling,herprivateaddress.BywhichmeansherletterfallsintothehandsofMissHowe's

mother.

LETTERLI.Mrs.HowetoClarissa.--Reproachesherformakingallherfriendsunhappy.Forbidshertowriteanymoretoherdaughter.

LETTERLII.Clarissa'smeekreply.

LETTERLIII.ClarissatoHannahBurton.

LETTERLIV.HannahBurton.Inanswer.

LETTERLV.ClarissatoMissNorton.--

Excusesherlongsilence.Asksheraquestion,withaviewtodetectLovelace.Hintsathisungratefulvillany.Self-recrimination.

LETTERLVI.Mrs.NortontoClarissa.--Answersherquestion.InveighsagainstLovelace.Hopesshehasescapedwithherhonour.Consolesherbyabriefrelationofherowncase,andfrommotivestrulypious.

LETTERLVII.ClarissatoLadyBettyLawrance.--Requestsananswertothreequestions,withaviewfarthertodetect



Lovelace.

LETTERLVIII.LadyBettytoClarissa.--Answersherquestions.Inthekindestmannerofferstomediatebetweenhernephewandher.

LETTERLIX.LX.ClarissatoMrs.Hodges,heruncleHarlowe'shousekeeper;withaviewofstillfartherdetectingLovelace.---Mrs.Hodges'sanswer.

LETTERLXI.ClarissatoLadyBettyLawrance.--Acquaintsherwithhernephew'sbaseness.Charitablywisheshisreformation;bututterly,andfromprinciple,rejectshim.

LETTERLXII.ClarissatoMrs.Norton.--Iscomfortedbyherkindsoothings.Wishesshehadbeenherchild.Willnotallowhertocomeuptoher;why.Someaccountofthepeoplesheiswith;andofaworthywoman,Mrs.Lovick,wholodgesinthehouse.BrieflyhintstoherthevileusageshehasreceivedfromLovelace.

LETTERLXIII.Mrs.NortontoClarissa.--InveighsagainstLovelace.WishesMissHowemightbeinducedtorefrainfromfreedomsthatdohurt,andcandonogood.Fartherpiouslyconsolesher.

LETTERLXIV.ClarissatoMrs.Norton.--Anewtrouble.AnangryletterfromMissHowe.Theoccasion.Herheartisbroken.Shallbeuneasy,tillshecangetherfather'scurserevoked.Castsabouttowhomshecanapplyforthispurpose.Atlastresolvestowritetohersistertobeghermediation.

LETTERLXV.MissHowetoClarissa.--Herangryandreproachfulletterabove-mentioned;demandsfromhertheclearingupofherconduct.

LETTERLXVI.ClarissatoMissHowe.--Gentlyremonstratesuponherseverity.Tothishourknowsnotallthe

methodstakentodeceiveandruinher.Butwillbriefly,yetcircumstantially,enterintothedarkerpartofhersadstory,thoughherheartsinksunderthethoughtsofarecollectionsopainful.

LETTERLXVII.LXVIII.LXIX.LXX.Fromthesame.--Shegivesthepromisedparticularsofherstory.Begsthattheblackestpartsofitmaybekeptsecret;andwhy.Desiresonefriendlytear,andnomore,maybedroptfromhergentleeye,onthehappydaythatshallshutupallhersorrows.

LETTERLXXI.LXXII.MissHowetoClarissa.--Execratestheabandonedprofligate.Shemust,shetellsher,looktotheworldbeyondthisforherreward.UnravelssomeofLovelace'splots;and

detectshisforgeries.IsapprehensiveforherownaswellasClarissa'ssafety.Adviseshertopursuealegalvengeance.LaudablecustomintheIsleofMan.Offerspersonallytoattendherinacourtofjustice.

LETTERLXXIII.ClarissatoMissHowe.--Cannotconsenttoaprosecution.DiscoverswhoitwasthatpersonatedheratHampstead.Sheisquitesickoflife,andofanearthinwhichinnocentandbenevolentspiritsaresuretobeconsideredasaliens.



THEHISTORY

OF

CLARISSAHARLOWE

LETTERI

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SAT.MIDNIGHT.

Norest,saysatextthatIonceheardpreachedupon,tothewicked--andIcannotclosemyeyes(yetonlywantedtocompoundforhalfanhourinanelbow-chair)--somustscribbleon.

IpartedwiththeCaptainafteranotherstrongdebatewithhiminrelationtowhatistobethefateofthislady.Asthefellowhasanexcellenthead,andwouldhavemadeaneminentfigureinanystationoflife,hadnothisearlydaysbeentaintedwithadeepcrime,andhe

detectedinit;andashehadtherightsideoftheargument;Ihadagooddealofdifficultywithhim;andatlastbroughtmyselftopromise,thatifIcouldprevailuponhergenerouslytoforgiveme,andtoreinstatemeinherfavour,Iwouldmakeitmywholeendeavourtogetoffofmycontrivances,ashappilyasIcould;(onlythatLadyBettyandCharlottemustcome;)andthensubstitutinghimforheruncle'sproxy,takeshametomyself,andmarry.

ButifIshould,Jack,(withthestrongestantipathytothestatethatevermanhad,)whatafigureshallImakeinrakishannals?AndcanIhavetakenallthispainsfornothing?Orforawifeonly,that,howeverexcellent,[andanywoman,doIthinkIcouldmakegood,becauseIcouldmakeanywomanfearaswellasloveme,]mighthavebeenobtainedwithout

theplagueIhavebeenat,andmuchmorereputablythanwithit?Andhastthounotseen,thatthishaughtywoman[forgivemethatIcallherhaughty!andawoman!Yetisshenothaughty?]knowsnothowtoforgivewithgraciousness?Indeedhasnotatallforgivenme?Butholdsmysoulinasuspensewhichhasbeensogrievoustoherown.

Atthissilentmoment,Ithink,thatifIweretopursuemyformerscheme,andresolvetotrywhetherIcannotmakeagreaterfaultserveasaspongetowipeouttheless;andthenbeforgivenforthat;Icanjustifymyselftomyself;andthat,asthefairinvinciblewouldsay,isallinall.

Asitismyintention,inallmyreflections,toavoidrepeating,at

leastdwellingupon,whatIhavebeforewrittentothee,thoughthestateofthecasemaynothavevaried;soIwouldhavetheetore-considertheoldreasonings(particularlythosecontainedinmyanswertothylast*expostulatorynonsense);andaddthenewastheyfallfrommypen;andthenIshallthinkmyselfinvincible;--atleast,asarguingraketorake.

*SeeVol.V.LetterXIV.



Itakethegainingofthisladytobeessentialtomyhappiness:andisitnotnaturalforallmentoaimatobtainingwhatevertheythinkwillmakethemhappy,betheobjectmoreorlessconsiderableintheeyesofothers?

Astothemannerofendeavouringtoobtainher,byfalsificationofoaths,vows,andthelike--donotthepoetsoftwothousandyearsandupwardstellus,thatJupiterlaughsattheperjuriesoflovers?Andletmeadd,towhatIhaveheretoforementionedonthathead,aquestionortwo.

Donotthemothers,theaunts,thegrandmothers,thegovernessesoftheprettyinnocents,always,fromtheirverycradlestoriperyears,preachtothemthedeceitfulnessofmen?--Thattheyarenottoregardtheiroaths,vows,promises?--Whataparceloffibberswouldallthesereverendmatronsbe,iftherewerenotnowandthenaprettycredulousroguetakeninforajustificationoftheirpreachments,andtoserveasabeaconlightedupforthebenefitoftherest?

Dowenotthensee,thatanhonestprowlingfellowisanecessaryevilonmanyaccounts?Dowenotseethatitishighlyrequisitethatasweetgirlshouldbenow-and-thendrawnasidebyhim?--Andthemoreeminentthegirl,inthegracesofperson,mind,andfortune,isnottheexamplelikelytobethemoreefficacious?

Ifthesepostulatabegrantedme,who,Ipray,canequalmycharmerinallthese?Whothereforesofitforanexampletotherestofhersex?--Atworst,IamentirelywithinmyworthyfriendMandeville'sassertion,thatprivatevicesarepublicbenefits.

Well,then,ifthissweetcreaturemustfall,asitiscalled,forthebenefitofalltheprettyfoolsofthesex,shemust;andthere'sanendofthematter.Andwhatwouldtherehavebeeninitofuncommonorrare,hadInotbeensolongaboutit?--AndsoIdismissallfurtherargumentationanddebateuponthequestion:andIimposeuponthee,whenthouwritesttome,aneternalsilenceonthishead.

Wafer'don,asanafter-writtenintroductiontotheparagraphswhichfollow,markedwithturnedcommas,[thus,']:

Lord,Jack,whatshallIdonow!Howoneevilbringsonanother!Dreadfulnewstotellthee!WhileIwasmeditatingasimplerobbery,herehaveI(inmyowndefenceindeed)beenguiltyofmurder!--Abl--ymurder!SoIbelieveitwillprove.Atherlastgasp!--Poorimpertinentopposer!--Eternallyresisting!--Eternallycontradicting!Thereshelieswelteringinherblood!herdeath'swoundhaveIgivenher!--Butshewasathief,animpostor,aswellasatormentor.Shehadstolenmypen.WhileIwassullenlymeditating,doubting,astomyfuturemeasures,shestoleit;andthusshewrotewithitinahandexactlylikemyown;and

wouldhavefacedmedown,thatitwasreallymyownhand-writing.

'Butletmereflectbeforeitistoolate.Onthemanifoldperfectionsofthisever-amiablecreatureletmereflect.Thehandyetisonlyheldup.Theblowisnotstruck.MissHowe'snextlettermayblowtheeup.Inpolicythoushouldestbenowatleasthonest.Thoucanstnotlivewithouther.Thouwouldestrathermarryherthanloseherabsolutely.Thoumayestundoubtedlyprevailuponher,inflexibleassheseemstobe,formarriage.Butifnowshefindstheeavillain,thoumayestnevermoreengageherattention,andsheperhapswillrefuseandabhorthee.



'YetalreadyhaveInotgonetoofar?Likearepentantthief,afraidofhisgang,andobligedtogoon,infearofhangingtillhecomestobehanged,Iamafraidofthegangofmycursedcontrivances.

'AsIhopetolive,Iamsorry,(atthepresentwriting,)thatIhavebeensuchafoolishplotter,astoputit,asIfearIhavedone,outofmyownpowertobehonest.Ihatecompulsioninallforms;andcannotbear,eventobecompelledtobethewretchmychoicehasmademe!Sonow,Belford,asthouhastsaid,Iamamachineatlast,andnofreeagent.

'Uponmysoul,Jack,itisaveryfoolishthingforamanofspirittohavebroughthimselftosuchaheightofiniquity,thathemustproceed,andcannothelphimself,andyettobenexttocertain,thatthisveryvictorywillundohim.

'Whywassuchawomanasthisthrownintomyway,whoseveryfallwillbeherglory,and,perhaps,notonlymyshamebutmydestruction?

'Whatahappinessmustthatmanknow,whomovesregularlytosomelaudableend,andhasnothingtoreproachhimselfwithinhisprogresstodoit!When,byhonestmeans,heattainshisend,howgreatandunmixedmustbehisenjoyments!Whatahappyman,inthisparticular

case,hadIbeen,haditbeengivenmetobeonlywhatIwishedtoappeartobe!'

Thusfarhadmyconsciencewrittenwithmypen;andseewhatarecreantshehadmadeofme!--Iseizedherbythethroat--There!--There,saidI,thouvileimpertinent!--takethat,andthat!--HowoftenhaveIgavetheewarning!--andnow,Ihope,thouintrudingvarletess,haveIdonethybusiness!

Pulingandlow-voiced,rearingupthydetestedhead,invainimplorestthoumymercy,who,inthydayhastshowedmesolittle!--Takethat,forarisingblow!--Andnowwillthypain,andmypainforthee,soonbeover.Liethere!--Welteron!--HadInotgiventheethydeath'swound,

thouwouldesthaverobbedmeofallmyjoys.Thoucouldestnothavemendedme,'tisplain.Thoucouldestonlyhavethrownmeintodespair.Didstthounotsee,thatIhadgonetoofartorecede?--Welteron,oncemoreIbidthee!--Gaspon!--Thatthylastgasp,surely!--Howharddiestthou!

ADIEU!--Unhappyman!ADIEU!

'Tiskindinthee,however,tobidme,Adieu!

Adieu,Adieu,Adieu,tothee,Othouinflexible,and,tillnow,unconquerablebosomintruder!--Adieutotheeforever!

LETTERII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SUNDAYMORN.(JUNE11).FOURO'CLOCK.

Afewwordstotheverbalinformationthousentestmelastnightconcerningthypooroldman;andthenIrisefrommyseat,shakemyself,



refresh,new-dress,andsotomycharmer,whom,notwithstandingherreserves,IhopetoprevailupontowalkoutwithmeontheHeaththiswarmandfinemorning.

Thebirdsmusthaveawakenedherbeforenow.Theyareinfullsong.Shealwaysgloriedinaccustomingherselftobeholdthesunrise--oneofGod'snaturalwonders,asonceshecalledit.

Herwindowsalutestheeast.Thevalleysmustbegildedbyhisrays,bythetimeIamwithher;foralreadyhavetheymadetheup-landssmile,andthefaceofnaturecheerful.

HowunsuitablewillthoufindthisgayprefacetoasubjectsogloomyasthatIamnowturningto!

Iamgladtohearthytediousexpectationsareatlastanswered.

Thyservanttellsmethatthouareplaguilygrievedattheoldfellow'sdeparture.

Ican'tsay,butthoumayestlookasifthouwert;harassedasthouhastbeenforanumberofdaysandnightswithacloseattendanceuponadyingman,beholdinghisdrawing-onhour--pretending,fordecency'ssake,towhineoverhisexcruciatingpangs;tobeinthewaytoanswerathousand

impertinentinquiriesafterthehealthofamanthouwishedesttodie--topraybyhim--forsooncethouwrotesttome!--Toreadbyhim--tobeforcedtojoininconsultationwithacrewofsolemnandparadingdoctors,andtheirofficiouszanies,theapothecaries,joinedwiththebutcherlytribeofscarficators;allcombinedtocarryonthephysicalfarce,andtocutoutthongsbothfromhisfleshandhisestate--tohavethesuperaddedapprehensionofdividingthyinterestinwhatheshallleavewithacrewofeager-hoping,never-to-be-satisfiedrelations,legatees,andthedevilknowswho,ofprivategratifiersofpassionslaudableandillaudable--inthesecircumstances,Iwondernotthatthoulookestbeforeservants,(aslittlegrievedasthouafterheirship,)asifthouindeedwertgrieved;andasifthemostwry-fac'dwoehadbefallenthee.

Then,asIhaveoftenthought,thereflectionthatmustnaturallyarisefromsuchmortifyingobjects,asthedeathofonewithwhomwehavebeenfamiliar,mustafford,whenweareobligedtoattenditinitsslowapproaches,andinitsface-twistingpangs,thatitwillonedaybeourowncase,goesagreatwaytocredittheappearanceofgrief.

Andthatitisthis,seriouslyreflectedupon,maytemporallygiveafineairofsinceritytothewailingsoflivelywidows,heart-exultingheirs,andresiduarylegateesofalldenominations;since,bykeepingdowntheinwardjoy,thoseinterestingreflectionsmustsaddentheaspect,andaddanappearanceofrealconcerntotheassumedsables.

Well,but,nowthouartcometotherewardofallthywatchings,anxieties,andcloseattendances,tellmewhatitis;tellmeifitcompensatethytrouble,andanswerthyhope?

Astomyself,thouseest,bythegravityofmystyle,howthesubjecthashelpedtomortifyme.ButthenecessityIamunderofcommittingeitherspeedymatrimony,orarape,hassaddenedovermygayerprospects,and,morethanthecaseitself,contributedtomakemesympathizewiththepresentjoyful-sorrow.



Adieu,Jack,Imustbesoonoutofmypain;andmyClarissashallbesoonoutofher's--forsodoesthearduousnessofthecaserequire.

LETTERIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SUNDAYMORNING.

Ihavehadthehonourofmycharmer'scompanyfortwocompletehours.WemetbeforesixinMrs.Moore'sgarden.AwalkontheHeathrefusedme.

Thesedatenessofheraspectandherkindcomplianceinthismeetinggavemehopes.AndallthateithertheCaptainandIhadurgedyesterdaytoobtainafullandfreepardon,thatre-urgedI;andItoldher,besides,thatCaptainTomlinsonwasgonedownwithhopestoprevailuponheruncleHarlowetocomeupinperson,inordertopresenttomethegreatestblessingthatmaneverreceived.

ButtheutmostIcouldobtainwas,thatshewouldtakenoresolutioninmyfavourtillshereceivedMissHowe'snextletter.

IwillnotrepeattheargumentsIused;butIwillgivetheethesubstanceofwhatshesaidinanswertothem.

Shehadconsideredofeverything,shetoldme.Mywholeconductwasbeforeher.ThehouseIcarriedhertomustbeavilehouse.Thepeopleearlyshowedwhattheywerecapableof,intheearnestattemptmadetofastenMissPartingtonuponher;asshedoubtednot,withmyapprobation.[Surely,thoughtI,shehasnotreceivedaduplicateofMissHowe'sletterofdetection!]Theyheardhercries.Myinsultwasundoubtedlypremeditated.Bymywholerecollectedbehaviourtoher,previoustoit,itmustbeso.Ihadthevilestofviews,noquestion.Andmytreatmentofherputitoutofalldoubt.

Souloverall,Belford!Sheseemssensibleoflibertiesthatmypassionmademeinsensibleofhavingtaken,orshecouldnotsodeeplyresent.

Shebesoughtmetogiveoverallthoughtsofher.Sometimes,shesaid,shethoughtherselfcruellytreatedbyhernearestanddearestrelations;atsuchtimes,aspiritofrepiningandevenofresentmenttookplace;andthereconciliation,atothertimessodesirable,wasnotthensomuchthefavouritewishofherheart,aswastheschemeshehadformerlyplanned--oftakinghergoodNortonforherdirectressandguide,andlivinguponherownestateinthemannerhergrandfatherhadintendedsheshouldlive.

ThisschemeshedoubtednotthathercousinMorden,whowasoneofher

trusteesforthatestate,wouldenableher,(andthat,asshehoped,withoutlitigation,)topursue.Andifhecan,anddoes,what,Sir,letmeaskyou,saidshe,haveIseeninyourconduct,thatshouldmakemeprefertoitanunionofinterest,wherethereissuchadisunioninminds?

Sothouseest,Jack,thereisreason,aswellasresentment,inthepreferenceshemakesagainstme!--Thouseest,thatshepresumestothinkthatshecanbehappywithoutme;andthatshemustbeunhappywithme!



Ihadbesoughther,intheconclusionofmyre-urgedarguments,towritetoMissHowebeforeMissHowe'sanswercouldcome,inordertolaybeforeherthepresentstateofthings;andifshewouldpayadeferencetoherjudgment,toletherhaveanopportunitytogiveit,onthefullknowledgeofthecase--

SoIwould,Mr.Lovelace,wastheanswer,ifIwereindoubtmyself,whichIwouldprefer--marriage,ortheschemeIhavementioned.Youcannotthink,Sir,butthelattermustbemychoice.Iwishtopartwithyouwithtemper--don'tputmeuponrepeating--

Partwithme,Madam!interruptedI--Icannotbearthosewords!--Butletmebeseechyou,however,towritetoMissHowe.Ihope,ifMissHoweisnotmyenemy--

Sheisnottheenemyofyourperson,Sir;--asyouwouldbeconvinced,ifyousawherlastletter*tome.Butwereshenotanenemytoyouractions,shewouldnotbemyfriend,northefriendofvirtue.Whywillyouprovokefromme,Mr.Lovelace,theharshnessofexpression,which,however,which,howeverdeservedbyyou,Iamunwillingjustnowtouse,havingsufferedenoughinthetwopastdaysfrommyownvehemence?

*TheladyinnocentlymeansMr.Lovelace'sforgedone.SeeVol.V.

LetterXXX.

Ibitmylipforvexation.Andwassilent.

MissHowe,proceededshe,knowsthefullstateofmattersalready,Sir.TheanswerIexpectfromherrespectsmyself,notyou.Herheartistoowarminthecauseoffriendship,toleavemeinsuspenseonemomentlongerthanisnecessaryastowhatIwanttoknow.Nordoesheranswerabsolutelydependuponherself.Shemustseeapersonfirst,andthatpersonperhapsseeothers.

Thecursedsmuggler-woman,Jack!--MissHowe'sTownsend,Idoubtnot--

Plot,contrivance,intrigue,stratagem!--Underground-molesthesewomen--butlettheearthcoverme!--letmebeamoletoo,thoughtI,iftheycarrytheirpoint!--andifthisladyescapemenow!

ShefranklyownedthatshehadoncethoughtofembarkingoutofallourwaysforsomeoneofourAmericancolonies.Butnowthatshehadbeencompelledtoseeme,(whichhadbeenhergreatestdread),andwhichshemightbehappiestintheresumptionofherformerfavouritescheme,ifMissHowecouldfindherareputableandprivateasylum,tillhercousinMordencouldcome.--Butifhecamenotsoon,andifshehadadifficultytogettoaplaceofrefuge,whetherfromherbrotherorfromanybodyelse,[meaningme,Isuppose,]shemightyetperhapsgoabroad;for,tosaythetruth,shecouldnotthinkofreturningtoherfather'shouse,

sinceherbrother'srage,hersister'supbraidings,herfather'sanger,hermother'sstill-more-affectingsorrowings,andherownconsciousnessunderthemall,wouldbeunsupportabletoher.

OJack!Iamsicktodeath,Ipine,Idie,forMissHowe'snextletter!Iwouldbind,gag,strip,rob,anddoanythingbutmurder,tointerceptit.

But,determinedassheseemstobe,itwasevidenttome,nevertheless,thatshehadstillsometendernessforme.



Sheoftenweptasshetalked,andmuchoftenersighed.Shelookedatmetwicewithaneyeofundoubtedgentleness,andthreetimeswithaneyetendingtocompassionandsoftness;butitsbenignrayswereasoftensnatchedback,asImaysay,andherfaceaverted,asifhersweeteyeswerenottobetrusted,andcouldnotstandagainstmyeagereyes;seeking,astheydid,foralostheartinher's,andendeavouringtopenetratetoherverysoul.

MorethanonceItookherhand.Shestrugglednotmuchagainstthefreedom.Ipresseditoncewithmylips--shewasnotveryangry.Afrownindeed--butafrownthathadmoredistressinitthanindignation.

Howcamethedearsoul,(clothedasitiswithsuchasilkenvesture,)byallitssteadiness?*Wasitnecessarythattheactivegloomofsuchatyrantofafather,shouldcommixwithsuchapassivesweetnessofawill-lessmother,toproduceaconstancy,anequanimity,asteadiness,inthedaughter,whichneverwomanbeforecouldboastof?Ifso,sheismoreobligedtothatdespoticfatherthanIcouldhaveimaginedacreaturetobe,whogavedistinctiontoeveryonerelatedtoherbeyondwhatthecrownitselfcanconfer.

*SeeVol.I.LettersIX.XIV.andXIX.forwhatsheherselfsaysonthat

steadinesswhichMr.Lovelace,thoughadeservedsuffererbyit,cannothelpadmiring.

Ihoped,Isaid,thatshewouldadmitoftheintendedvisit,whichIhadsooftenmentioned,ofthetwoladies.

Shewashere.Shehadseenme.Shecouldnothelpherselfatpresent.Sheevenhadthehighestregardfortheladiesofmyfamily,becauseoftheirworthycharacters.Theresheturnedawayhersweetface,andvanquishedanhalf-risensigh.

Ikneeledtoherthen.Itwasuponaverdantcushion;forwewereupon

thegrasswalk.Icaughtherhand.Ibesoughtherwithanearnestnessthatcalledup,asIcouldfeel,myhearttomyeyes,tomakeme,byherforgivenessandexample,moreworthyofthem,andofherownkindandgenerouswishes.Bymysoul,Madam,saidI,youstabmewithyourgoodness--yourundeservedgoodness!andIcannotbearit!

Why,why,thoughtI,asIdidseveraltimesinthisconversation,willshenotgenerouslyforgiveme?WhywillshemakeitnecessaryformetobringLadyBettyandmycousintomyassistance?Canthefortressexpectthesameadvantageouscapitulation,whichyieldsnottothesummonsofaresistlessconqueror,asifitgavenotthetroubleofbringingupandraisingitsheavyartilleryagainstit?

Whatsensibilities,saidthedivinecreature,withdrawingherhand,mustthouhavesuppressed!Whatadreadful,whatajudicialhardnessofheartmustthinebe!whocanstbecapableofsuchemotions,assometimesthouhastshown;andofsuchsentiments,assometimeshaveflowedfromthylips;yetcansthavesofarovercomethemallastobeabletoactasthouhastacted,andthatfromsettledpurposeandpremeditation;andthis,asitissaid,throughoutthewholeofthylife,frominfancytothistime!

Itoldher,thatIhadhoped,fromthegenerousconcernshehadexpressed



forme,whenIwassosuddenlyanddangerouslytakenill--[theipecacuanhaexperiment,Jack!]

Sheinterruptedme--Wellhaveyourewardedmefortheconcernyouspeakof!--However,Iwillfranklyown,nowthatIamdeterminedtothinknomoreofyou,thatyoumight,(unsatisfiedasIneverthelesswaswithyou,)havemadeaninterest--

Shepaused.Ibesoughthertoproceed.

Doyousuppose,Sir,andturnedawayhersweetfaceaswewalked,--DoyousupposethatIhadnotthoughtoflayingdownaplantogovernmyselfby,whenIfoundmyselfsounhappilyover-reachedandcheated,asImaysay,outofmyself--WhenIfound,thatIcouldnotbe,anddo,whatIwishedtobe,andtodo,doyouimaginethatIhadnotcastabout,whatwasthenextpropercoursetotake?--Anddoyoubelievethatthisnextcoursehasnotcausedmesomepaintobeobligedto--

Thereagainshestopt.

Butletusbreakoffdiscourse,resumedshe.Thesubjectgrowstoo--Shesighed--Letusbreakoffdiscourse--Iwillgoin--Iwillprepareforchurch--[Thedevil!thoughtI.]Well,asIcanappearinthoseevery-day-wornclothes--lookinguponherself--Iwillgotochurch.

Shethenturnedfrommetogointothehouse.

Blessme,mybelovedcreature,blessmewiththecontinuanceofthisaffectingconversation.--Remorsehasseizedmyheart!--Ihavebeenexcessivelywrong--givemefarthercausetocursemyheedlessfolly,bythecontinuanceofthiscalmbutsoul-penetratingconversation.

No,no,Mr.Lovelace:Ihavesaidtoomuch.Impatiencebeginstobreakinuponme.Ifyoucanexcusemetotheladies,itwillbebetterformymind'ssake,andforyourcredit'ssake,thatIdonotseethem.Callmetothemover-nice,petulant,prudish--whatyoupleasecallmetothem.NobodybutMissHowe,towhom,nexttotheAlmighty,andmyownmother,I

wishtostandacquittedofwilfulerror,shallknowthewholeofwhathaspassed.Behappy,asyoumay!--Deservetobehappy,andhappyyouwillbe,inyourownreflectionatleast,wereyoutobeeversounhappyinotherrespects.Formyself,ifIevershallbeenabled,onduereflection,tolookbackuponmyownconduct,withoutthegreatreproachofhavingwilfully,andagainstthelightofmyownjudgment,erred,IshallbemorehappythanifIhadallthattheworldaccountsdesirable.

Thenoblecreatureproceeded;forIcouldnotspeak.

Thisself-acquittal,whenspiritsarelentmetodispelthedarknesswhichatpresenttoooftenover-cloudsmymind,will,Ihope,makemesuperiortoallthecalamitiesthatcanbefalme.

Herwholepersonwasinformedbyhersentiments.Sheseemedtobetallerthanbefore.HowtheGodwithinherexaltedher,notonlyaboveme,butaboveherself!

Divinecreature!(asIthoughther,)Icalledher.Iacknowledgedthesuperiorityofhermind;andwasproceeding--butsheinterruptedme--Allhumanexcellence,saidshe,iscomparativeonly.Mymind,Ibelieve,isindeedsuperiortoyour's,debasedasyour'sisbyevilhabits:butIhadnotknownittobeso,ifyouhadnottakenpainstoconvincemeofthe



inferiorityofyour's.

Howgreat,howsublimelygreat,thiscreature!--BymysoulIcannotforgiveherforhervirtues!Thereisnobearingtheconsciousnessoftheinfiniteinferiorityshechargedmewith.--Butwhywillshebreakfromme,whengoodresolutionsaretakingplace?Thered-hotironsherefusestostrike--Owhywillshesuffertheyieldingwaxtoharden?

Wehadgonebutafewpacestowardsthehouse,whenweweremetbytheimpertinentwomen,withnotice,thatbreakfastwasready.Icouldonly,withupliftedhands,beseechhertogivemehopeofarenewedconversationafterbreakfast.

No--shewouldgotochurch.

Andintothehouseshewent,andupstairsdirectly.Norwouldsheobligemewithhercompanyatthetea-table.

Ioffered,byMrs.Moore,toquitboththetableandtheparlour,ratherthansheshouldexcludeherself,ordeprivethetwowidowsofthefavourofhercompany.

Thatwasnotallthematter,shetoldMrs.Moore.Shehadbeenstrugglingtokeepdownhertemper.Ithadcosthersomepainstodoit.

Shewasdesiroustocomposeherself,inhopestoreceivebenefitbythedivineworshipshewasgoingtojoinin.

Mrs.Moorehopedforherpresenceatdinner.

Shehadratherbeexcused.Yet,ifshecouldobtaintheframeofmindshehopedfor,shemightnotbeaversetoshow,thatshehadgotabovethosesensibilities,whichgaveconsiderationtoamanwhodeservednottobetoherwhathehadbeen.

Thissaid,nodoubt,toletMrs.Mooreknow,thatthegarden-conversationhadnotbeenareconcilingone.

Mrs.Mooreseemedtowonderthatwewerenotuponabetterfootofunderstanding,aftersolongaconference;andthemore,asshebelievedthattheladyhadgivenintotheproposalfortherepetitionoftheceremony,whichIhadtoldthemwasinsisteduponbyheruncleHarlowe.--ButIaccountedforthis,bytellingbothwidowsthatshewasresolvedtokeeponthereservetillsheheardfromCaptainTomlinson,whetherherunclewouldbepresentinpersonatthesolemnity,orwouldnamethatworthygentlemanforhisproxy.

AgainIenjoinedstrictsecresy,astothisparticular;whichwaspromisedbythewidows,aswellasforthemselves,asforMissRawlins;ofwhosetaciturnitytheygavemesuchanaccount,asshowedme,thatshewassecret-keeper-generaltoallthewomenoffashionatHampstead.

TheLord,Jack!Whataworldofmischief,atthisrate,mustMissRawlinsknow!--WhataPandora'sboxmustherbosombe!--Yet,hadInothingthatwasmoreworthyofmyattentiontoregard,Iwouldengagetoopenit,andmakemyusesofthediscovery.

Andnow,Belford,thouperceivest,thatallmyrelianceisuponthemediationofLadyBettyandMissMontague,anduponthehopeofinterceptingMissHowe'snextletter.



LETTERIV

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.

ThisfairinexorableisactuallygonetochurchwithMrs.MooreandMrs.Bevis;butWill.closelyattendshermotions;andIaminthewaytoreceiveanyoccasionalintelligencefromhim.

Shedidnotchoose,[amightywordwiththesex!asiftheywerealwaystohavetheirownwills!]thatIshouldwaituponher.Ididnotmuchpressit,thatshemightnotapprehendthatIthoughtIhadreasontodoubthervoluntaryreturn.

IoncehaditinmyheadtohavefoundthewidowBevisotheremployment.AndIbelieveshewouldhavebeenaswellpleasedwithmycompanyastogotochurch;forsheseemedirresolutewhenItoldherthattwooutofafamilywereenoughtogotochurchforoneday.Buthavingherthingson,(asthewomencalleverything,)andherauntMooreexpectinghercompany,shethoughtitbesttogo--lestitshouldlookoddly,youknow,whisperedshe,toonewhowasaboveregardinghowitlooked.

SohereamIinmydining-room;andhavenothingtodobuttowritetilltheyreturn.

Andwhatwillbemysubjectthinkestthou?Why,theoldbeatenonetobesure;self-debate--throughtemporaryremorse:fortheblowbeingnotstruck,herguardianangelisredoublinghiseffortstosaveher.

Ifitbenotthat,[andyetwhatpowershouldherguardianangelhaveoverme?]Idon'tknowwhatitisthatgivesachecktomyrevenge,wheneverImeditatetreasonagainstsosovereignavirtue.Conscienceisdeadandgone,asItoldthee;soitcannotbethat.Ayoungconsciencegrowingup,likethephoenix,fromtheashesoftheoldone,itcannotbe,surely.Butifitwere,itwouldbehard,ifIcouldnotoverlaya

youngconscience.

Well,then,itmustbeLOVE,Ifancy.LOVEitself,inspiringloveofanobjectsoadorable--somelittleattentionpossiblypaidlikewisetothywhiningargumentsinherfavour.

LetLOVEthenbeallowedtobethemovingprinciple;andtherather,asLOVEnaturallymakestheloverlothtodisobligetheobjectofitsflame;andknowing,thattoanoffenceofthemeditatedkindwillbeamortaloffencetoher,cannotbearthatIshouldthinkofgivingit.

LetLOVEandmetalktogetheralittleonthissubject--beitayoungconscience,orlove,orthyself,Jack,thouseestthatIamforgiving

everywhiffleraudience.Butthismustbethelastdebateonthissubject;forisnotherfateinamanneratitscrisis?Andmustnotmynextstepbeanirretrievableone,tenditwhichwayitwill?

***

Andnowthedebateisover.



Athousandcharmingthings,(forLOVEisgentlerthanCONSCIENCE,)hasthislittleurchinsuggestedinherfavour.Hepretendedtoknowbothourhearts:andhewouldhaveit,thatthoughmylovewasaprodigiousstrongandpotentlove;andthoughithasthemeritofmanymonths,faithfulservicetoplead,andhashadinfinitedifficultiestostrugglewith;yetthatitisnotTHERIGHTSORTOFLOVE.

Rightsortoflove!--Apuppy!--But,withdueregardtoyourdeityship,saidI,whatmeritshasshewithYOU,thatyoushouldbeofherparty?Isher's,Iprayyou,arightsortoflove?Isitloveatall?Shedon'tpretendthatitis.Sheownsnotyoursovereignty.Whatad---lImovesyou,topleadthusearnestlyforarebel,whodespisesyourpower?

AndthenhecamewithhisIf'sandAnd's--anditwouldhavebeen,andstill,ashebelieved,wouldbe,love,andaloveoftheexaltedkind,ifIwouldencourageitbytherightsortoflovehetalkedof:and,injustificationofhisopinion,pleadedherownconfessions,aswellthoseofyesterday,asofthismorning:andevenwentsofarbackastomyipecacuanhaillness.

Inevertalkedsofamiliarlywithhisgodshipbefore:thoumayestthink,therefore,thathisdialectsoundedoddlyinmyears.Andthenhetoldme,howoftenIhadthrowncoldwateruponthemostcharmingflamethat

everwarmedalady'sbosom,whilebutyoungandrising.Irequiredadefinitionofthisrightsortoflove,hetriedatit:butmadeasorryhandofit:norcouldI,forthesoulofme,beconvinced,thatwhathemeanttoextolwasLOVE.

Uponthewhole,wehadanoblecontroversyuponthissubject,inwhichheinsistedupontheunprecedentedmeritofthelady.NeverthelessIgotthebetterofhim;forhewasstruckabsolutelydumb,when(wavingherpresentperverseness,whichyetwasasufficientanswertoallhispleas)Iasserted,andofferedtoproveit,byathousandinstancesimpromptu,thatlovewasnotgovernedbymerit,norcouldbeunderthedominionofprudence,oranyotherreasoningpower:andiftheladywerecapableof

love,itwasofsuchasortashehadnothingtodowith,andwhichneverbeforereignedinafemaleheart.

Iaskedhim,whathethoughtofherflightfromme,atatimewhenIwasmorethanhalfovercomebytherightsortoflovehetalkedof?--AndthenIshowedhimthelettershewrote,andleftbehindherforme,withanintention,nodoubt,absolutelytobreakmyheart,ortoprovokemetohang,drown,orshootmyself;tosaynothingofamultitudeofdeclarationsfromher,defyinghispower,andimputingallthatlookedlikeloveinherbehaviourtome,tothepersecutionandrejectionofherfriends;whichmadeherthinkofmebutasalastresort.

LOVEthengaveherup.Theletter,hesaid,deservedneitherpardonnor

excuse.Hedidnotthinkhehadbeenpleadingforsuchadeclaredrebel.Andastotherest,heshouldbeabetrayeroftherightsofhisownsovereignty,ifwhatIhadallegedweretrue,andhewerestilltopleadforher.

Isworetothetruthofall.AndtrulyIswore:whichperhapsIdonotalwaysdo.

Andnowwhatthinkestthoumustbecomeofthelady,whomLOVEitselfgivesup,andCONSCIENCEcannotpleadfor?



LETTERV

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SUNDAYAFTERNOON.

OBelford!whatahair's-breadthescapehaveIhad!--Suchaone,thatItremblebetweenterrorandjoy,atthethoughtofwhatmighthavehappened,anddidnot.

Whataperversegirlisthis,tocontendwithherfate;yethasreasontothink,thatherverystarsfightagainsther!Iamtheluckiestofme!--Butmybreathalmostfailsme,whenIreflectuponwhataslenderthreadmydestinyhung.

Butnottokeeptheeinsuspense;Ihave,withinthishalf-hour,obtainedpossessionoftheexpectedletterfromMissHowe--andbysuchanaccident!Buthere,withtheformer,Idispatchthis;thymessengerwaiting.

LETTERVI

MR.LOVELACE[INCONTINUATION.]

Thusitwas--MycharmeraccompaniedMrs.Mooreagaintochurchthisafternoon.Ihadbeeninveryearnest,inthefirstplace,toobtainhercompanyatdinner:butinvain.AccordingtowhatshehadsaidtoMrs.Moore,*Iwastooconsiderabletohertobeallowedthatfavour.Inthenextplace,Ibesoughthertofavourme,afterdinner,withanothergarden-walk.Butshewouldagaingotochurch.AndwhatreasonhaveI

torejoicethatshedid!

*SeeLetterIII.ofthisvolume.

Myworthyfriend,Mrs.Bevis,thoughtonesermonaday,wellobserved,enough;sostaidathometobearmecompany.

TheladyandMrs.Moorehadnotbeengoneaquarterofanhour,whenayoungcountry-fellowonhorsebackcametothedoor,andinquiredforMrs.HarriotLucas.ThewidowandI(undeterminedhowweweretoentertaineachother)wereintheparlournextthedoor;andhearingthefellow's

inquiry,OmydearMrs.Bevis,saidI,Iamundone,undoneforever,ifyoudon'thelpmeout!--Sincehere,inallprobability,isamessengerfromthatimplacableMissHowewithaletter;which,ifdeliveredtoMrs.Lovelace,mayundoallwehavebeendoing.

What,saidshe,wouldyouhavemedo?

Callthemaidinthismoment,thatImaygiveherherlesson;andifitbeasIimagined,I'lltellyouwhatyoushalldo.



Wid.Margaret!--Margaret!comeinthisminute.

Lovel.Whatanswer,Mrs.Margaret,didyougivetheman,uponhisaskingforMrs.HarriotLucas?

Peggy.Ionlyasked,Whatwashisbusiness,andwhohecamefrom?(for,Sir,yourhonour'sservanthadtoldmehowthingsstood):andIcameatyourcall,Madam,beforeheansweredme.

Lovel.Well,child,ifeveryouwishtobehappyinwedlockyourself,andwouldhavepeopledisappointedwhowanttomakemischiefbetweenyouandyourhusband,getoutofhimhismessage,orletterifhehasone,andbringittome,andsaynothingtoMrs.Lovelace,whenshecomesin;andhereisaguineaforyou.

Peggy.IwilldoallIcantoserveyourhonour'sworshipfornothing:[nevertheless,withareadyhand,takingtheguinea:]forMr.Williamtellsmewhatagoodgentlemanyoube.

AwaywentPeggytothefellowatthedoor.

Peggy.Whatisyourbusiness,friend,withMrs.HarryLucas?

Fellow.Imustspeaktoherherownself.

Lovel.Mydearestwidow,doyoupersonateMrs.Lovelace--forHeaven'ssakedoyoupersonateMrs.Lovelace.

Wid.IpersonateMrs.Lovelace,Sir!HowcanIdothat?--Sheisfair;Iambrown.Sheisslender:Iamplump--

Lovel.Nomatter,nomatter--Thefellowmaybeanew-comeservant:heisnotinlivery,Isee.Hemaynotknowherperson.Youcanbutbebloatedandinadropsy.

Wid.DropsicalpeoplelooknotsofreshandruddyasIdo.

Lovel.True--buttheclownmaynotknowthat.'Tisbutforapresentdeception.Peggy,Peggy,call'dI,inafemaletone,softlyatthedoor.Madam,answer'dPeggy;andcameuptometotheparlour-door.

Lovel.Tellhimtheladyisill;andhaslaindownuponthecouch.Andgethisbusinessfromhim,whateveryoudo.

AwaywentPeggy.

Lovel.Now,mydearwidow,liealongthesettee,andputyourhandkerchiefoveryourface,that,ifhewillspeaktoyouhimself,hemaynotseeyoureyesandyourhair.--So--that'sright.--I'llstepintotheclosetbyyou.

Ididso.

Peggy.[Returning.]Hewon'tdeliverhisbusinesstome.HewillspeaktoMrs.HarriotLucasherownself.

Lovel.[Holdingthedoorinmyhand.]TellhimthatthisisMrs.HarriotLucas;andlethimcomein.Whisperhim(ifhedoubts)thatsheisbloated,dropsical,andnotthewomanshewas.



AwaywentMargery.

Lovel.Andnow,mydearwidow,letmeseewhatacharmingMrs.Lovelaceyou'llmake!--AskifhecomesfromMissHowe.Askifheliveswithher.Askhowshedoes.Callher,ateveryword,yourdearMissHowe.Offerhimmoney--takethishalf-guineaforhim--complainofyourhead,tohaveapretencetoholditdown;andcoveryourforeheadandeyeswithyourhand,whereyourhandkerchiefhidesnotyourface.--That'sright--anddismisstherascal--[herehecomes]--assoonasyoucan.

Incamethefellow,bowingandscraping,hishatpokedoutbeforehimwithbothhishands.

Fellow.Iamsorry,Madam,an'tpleaseyou,tofindyouben'twell.

Widow.Whatisyourbusinesswithme,friend?

Fellow.YouareMrs.HarriotLucas,Isuppose,Madam?

Widow.Yes.DoyoucomefromMissHowe?

Fellow.Ido,Madam.

Widow.Dostthouknowmyrightname,friend?

Fellow.Icangiveashrewdguess.Butthatisnoneofmybusiness.

Widow.Whatisthybusiness?IhopeMissHoweiswell?

Fellow.Yes,Madam;purewell,IthankGod.Iwishyouweresotoo.

Widow.Iamtoofullofgrieftobewell.

Fellow.SobelikeIhavehardtosay.

Widow.Myheadachessodreadfully,Icannotholditup.Imustbegofyoutoletmeknowyourbusiness.

Fellow.Nay,andthatbeall,mybusinessissoonknown.Itisbuttogivethisletterintoyourownpartiklarhands--hereitis.

Widow.[Takingit.]FrommydearfriendMissHowe?--Ah,myhead!

Fellow.Yes,Madam:butIamsorryyouaresobad.

Widow.DoyoulivewithMissHowe?

Fellow.No,Madam:Iamoneofhertenants'sons.Herlady-mothermustnotknowashowIcameofthiserrand.Buttheletter,Isuppose,willtellyouall.

Widow.HowshallIsatisfyyouforthiskindtrouble?

Fellow.Nohowatall.WhatIdoisforloveofMissHowe.Shewillsatisfymemorethanenough.But,may-hap,youcansendnoanswer,youaresoill.

Widow.Wasyouorderedtowaitforananswer?

Fellow.No,IcannotsayasthatIwas.ButIwasbiddentoobserve



howyoulooked,andhowyouwas;andifyoudidwritealineortwo,totakecareofit,andgiveitonlytoouryounglandladyinsecret.

Widow.YouseeIlookstrangely.NotsowellasIusedtodo.

Fellow.Nay,Idon'tknowthatIeversawyoubutoncebefore;andthatwasatastile,whereImetyouandmyyounglandlady;butknewbetterthantostareagentlewomanintheface;especiallyatastile.

Widow.Willyoueat,ordrink,friend?

Fellow.Acupofsmallale,Idon'tcareifIdo.

Widow.Margaret,taketheyoungmandown,andtreathimwithwhatthehouseaffords.

Fellow.Yourservant,Madam.ButIstaidtoeatasIcomealong,justupontheHeathyonder;orelse,tosaythetruth,Ihadbeenheresooner.[Thankmystars,thoughtI,thoudidst.]Apieceofpowderedbeefwasuponthetable,atthesignoftheCastle,whereIstopttoinquireforthishouse:andso,thoffIonlyintendedtowetmywhistle,Icouldnothelpeating.Soshallonlytasteofyourale;forthebeefwaswoundilycorned.

Pratingdog!Poxonthee!thoughtI.Hewithdrew,bowingandscraping.

Margaret,whisperedI,inafemalevoice[whisperingoutofthecloset,andholdingtheparlour-doorinmyhand]gethimoutofthehouseasfastasyoucan,lesttheycomefromchurch,andcatchhimhere.

Peggy.Neverfear,Sir.

Thefellowwentdown,anditseems,drankalargedraughtofale;andMargaretfindinghimverytalkative,toldhim,shebeggedhispardon,butshehadasweetheartjustcomefromsea,whomshewasforcedtohidein

thepantry;sowassurehewouldexcuseherfromstayingwithhim.

Ay,ay,tobesure,theclownsaid:forifhecouldnotmakesport,hewouldspoilnone.Buthewhisperedher,thatone'SquireLovelacewasadamnationrogue,ifthetruthmightbetold.

Forwhat?saidMargaret.Andcouldhavegivenhim,shetoldthewidow(whorelatedtomeallthis)agooddowseofthechaps.

Forkissingallthewomenhecamenear.

Atthesametime,thedogwrappedhimselfroundMargery,andgaveherasmack,that,shetoldMrs.Bevisafterwards,shemighthaveheardinto

theparlour.

Such,Jack,ishumannature:thusdoesitoperateinalldegrees;andsodoestheclown,aswellashispractises!Yetthisslydogknewnotbutthewenchhadasweetheartlockedupinthepantry!Ifthetruthwereknown,someoftheruddy-faceddairywenchesmightperhapscallhimadamnationrogue,asjustlyastheirbettersofthesamesexmight'SquireLovelace.

Thefellowtoldthemaid,that,bywhathediscoveredoftheyounglady's



face,itlookedveryrosytowhathetookittobe;andhethoughtheragooddealfatter,asshelay,andnotsotall.

Allwomenareborntointrigue,Jack;andpractiseitmoreorless,asfathers,guardians,governesses,fromdearexperience,cantell;andinloveaffairsarenaturallyexpert,andquickerintheirwitsbyhalfthanmen.Thisready,thoughrawwench,gaveaninstanceofthis,andimprovedonthedropsicalhintIhadgivenher.Thelady'sseemingplumpnesswasowingtoadropsicaldisorder,andtotheroundpostureshelayin--verylikely,truly.Herappearingtohimtobeshorter,hemighthaveobserved,wasowingtoherdrawingherfeetupfrompain,andbecausethecouchwastooshort,shesupposed--Adso,hedidnotthinkofthat.Herrosycolourwasowingtohergriefandhead-ache.--Ay,thatmightverywellbe--buthewashighlypleasedthathehadgiventheletterintoMrs.Harriot'sownhand,asheshouldtellMissHowe.

Hedesiredoncemoretoseetheladyathisgoingaway,andwouldnotbedenied.Thewidowthereforesatup,withherhandkerchiefoverherface,leaningherheadagainstthewainscot.

Heaskedifshehadanypartiklarmessage?

No:shewassoillshecouldnotwrite;whichwasagreatgrieftoher.

Shouldhecallthenextday?forhewasgoingtoLondon,nowhewassonear;andshouldstayatacousin'sthatnight,wholivedinastreetcalledFetter-Lane.

No:shewouldwriteassoonasable,andsendbythepost.

Well,then,ifshehadnothingtosendbyhim,mayhaphemightstayintownadayortwo;forhehadneverseenthelionsintheTower,norBedlam,northetombs;andhewouldmakeaholidayortwo,ashehadleavetodo,ifshehadnobusinessormessagethatrequiredhispostingdownnextday.

Shehadnot.

Sheofferedhimthehalf-guineaIhadgivenherforhim;butherefuseditwithgreatprofessionsofdisinterestedness,andlove,ashecalledit,toMissHowe;toservewhom,hewouldridetotheworld's-end,oreventoJericho.

Andsotheshockingrascalwentaway:andgladatmyheartwasIwhenhewasgone;forIfearednothingsomuchasthathewouldhavestaidtilltheycamefromchurch.

Thus,Jack,gotImyheart'sease,theletterofMissHowe;adthroughsuchatrainofaccidents,asmakesmesay,thatthelady'sstarsfightagainsther.ButyetImustattributeagooddealtomyownprecaution,

inhavingtakenrightmeasures.ForhadInotsecuredthewidowbymystories,andthemaidbymyservant,allwouldhavesignifiednothing.Andsoheartilyweretheysecured,theonebyasingleguinea,theotherbyhalfadozenwarmkisses,andtheaversiontheybothhadtosuchwickedcreaturesasdelightedinmakingmischiefbetweenmanandwife,thattheypromised,thatneitherMrs.Moore,MissRawlins,Mrs.Lovelace,noranybodyliving,shouldknowanythingofthematter.

ThewidowrejoicedthatIhadgotthemischief-maker'sletter.Iexcusedmyselftoher,andinstantlywithdrewwithit;and,afterIhadreadit,



felltomyshort-hand,toacquainttheewithmygoodluck:andtheynotreturningsosoonaschurchwasdone,(stepping,asitproved,intoMissRawlins's,andtarryingthereawhile,tobringthatbusygirlwiththemtodrinktea,)Iwrotethusfartothee,thatthoumightest,whenthoucamesttothisplace,rejoicewithmeupontheoccasion.

Theyareallthreejustcomein.

Ihastentothem.

LETTERVII


Ihavebegunanotherlettertothee,incontinuationofmynarrative:butIbelieveIshallsendtheethisbeforeIshallfinishthat.Bytheenclosedthouwiltsee,thatneitherofthecorrespondentsdeservemercyfromme:andIamresolvedtomaketheendingwithonethebeginningwiththeother.

IfthousayestthattheprovocationsIhavegiventooneofthemwill

justifyherfreedoms;Ianswer,sotheywill,toanyotherpersonbutmyself.Buthethatiscapableofgivingthoseprovocations,andhasthepowertopunishthosewhoabusehimforgivingthem,willshowhisresentment;andthemoreremorselessly,perhaps,ashehasdeservedthefreedoms.

Ifthousayest,itis,however,wrongtodoso;Ireply,thatitisneverthelesshumannature:--Andwouldstthounothavemetobeaman,Jack?

Herereadtheletter,ifthouwilt.Butthouartnotmyfriend,ifthouofferesttopleadforeitherofthesaucycreatures,afterthouhastreadit.

TOMRS.HARRIOTLUCAS,

ATMRS.MOORE'S,ATHAMPSTEAD.JUNE10.

AfterthediscoveriesIhadmadeofthevillanousmachinationsofthemostabandonedofmen,particularizedinmylongletterofWednesday*last,youwillbelieve,mydearestfriend,thatmysurpriseuponperusingyour'sofThursdayeveningfromHampstead**wasnotsogreatasmyindignation.Hadthevillainattemptedtofireacityinsteadofahouse,Ishouldnothavewonderedatit.AllthatIamamazedatis,

thathe(whoseboast,asIamtold,itis,thatnowomanshallkeephimoutofherbed-chamber,whenhehasmadearesolutiontobeinit)didnotdiscoverhisfootbefore.Anditisasstrangetome,that,havinggotyouatsuchashockingadvantage,andinsuchahorridhouse,youcould,atthetime,escapedishonour,andafterwardsgetfromsuchasetofinfernals.

*SeeVol.V.LetterXX.**Ibid.SeeLetterXXI.



Igaveyou,inmylongletterofWednesdayandThursdaylast,reasonswhyyououghttomistrustthatspeciousTomlinson.Thatman,mydear,mustbeasolemnvillain.MaylightningfromHeavenblastthewretch,whohassethimandtherestofhisREMORSELESSGANGatwork,toendeavourtodestroythemostconsummatevirtue!--Heavenbepraised!youhaveescapedfromalltheirsnares,andnowareoutofdanger.--SoIwillnottroubleyouatpresentwiththeparticularsIhavefurthercollectedrelatingtothisabominableimposture.

Forthesamereason,Iforbeartocommunicatetoyousomenewstoriesoftheabhorredwretchhimselfwhichhavecometomyears.One,inparticular,ofsoshockinganature!--Indeed,mydear,theman'sadevil.

ThewholestoryofMrs.Fretchville,andherhouse,Ihavenodoubttopronounce,likewise,anabsolutefiction.--Fellow!--Howmysoulspurnsthevillain!

Yourthoughtofgoingabroad,andyourreasonsforsodoing,mostsensiblyaffectme.Butbecomforted,mydear;Ihopeyouwillnotbeunderanecessityofquittingyournativecountry.WereIsurethatthatmustbethecruelcase,Iwouldabandonallmybetterprospects,andsoonbewithyou.AndIwouldaccompanyyouwhithersoeveryouwent,andshare

fortuneswithyou:foritisimpossiblethatIshouldbehappy,ifIknewthatyouwereexposednotonlytotheperilsofthesea,buttotheattemptsofothervilemen;yourpersonalgracesattractingeveryeye;andexposingyoutothosehourlydangers,whichothers,lessdistinguishedbythegiftsofnature,mightavoid.--AllthatIknowthatbeauty(sogreatlycoveted,andsogreatlyadmired)isgoodfor.

Omydear,wereIevertomarry,andtobethemotherofaCLARISSA,[Clarissamustbethename,ifpromisinglylovely,]howoftenwouldmyheartacheforthedearcreature,asshegrewup,whenIreflectedthataprudenceanddiscretion,unexampledinwoman,hadnot,inyou,beenasufficientprotectiontothatbeauty,whichhaddrawnafteritasmanyadmirersasbeholders!--HowlittleshouldIregrettheattacksofthat

crueldistemper,asitiscalled,whichfrequentlymakesthegreatestravagesinthefinestfaces!

SAT.AFTERNOON.

IhavejustpartedwithMrs.Townsend.*Ithoughtyouhadonceseenherwithme;butshesayssheneverhadthehonourtobepersonallyknowntoyou.Shehasamanlikespirit.Sheknowstheworld.Andhertwobrothersbeingintown,sheissureshecanengagetheminsogoodacause,and(ifthereshouldbeoccasion)boththeirships'crews,inyourservice.

*FortheaccountofMrs.Townsend,&c.seeVol.IV.LetterXLII.

Giveyourconsent,mydear;andthehorridvillainshallberepaidwithbrokenbones,atleast,forallhisvileness!

Themisfortuneis,Mrs.TownsendcannotbewithyoutillThursdaynext,orWednesday,atsoonest:Areyousureyoucanbesafewhereyouaretillthen?IthinkyouaretoonearLondon;andperhapsyouhadbetterbein



it.Ifyouremove,letme,theverymoment,knowwhither.

Howmyheartistorn,tothinkofthenecessitysodearacreatureisdriventoofhidingherself!Devilishfellow!Hemusthavebeensportiveandwantoninhisinventions--yetthatcruel,thatsavagesportivenesshassavedyoufromthesuddenviolencetowhichhehashadrecourseintheviolationofothers,ofnamesandfamiliesnotcontemptible.Forsuchthevillainalwaysgloriedtospreadhissnares.

Thevilenessofthisspeciousmonsterhasdonemore,thananyotherconsiderationcoulddo,tobringMr.Hickmanintocreditwithme.Mr.Hickmanaloneknows(fromme)ofyourflight,andthereasonofit.HadInotgivenhimthereason,hemighthavethoughtstillworseofthevileattempt.IcommunicatedittohimbyshowinghimyourletterfromHampstead.Whenhehadreadit,[andhetrembledandreddened,asheread,]hethrewhimselfatmyfeet,andbesoughtmetopermithimtoattendyou,andtogiveyoutheprotectionofhishouse.Thegood-naturedmanhadtearsinhiseyes,andwasrepeatedlyearnestonthissubject;proposingtotakehischariot-and-four,oraset,andinperson,inthefaceofalltheworld,givehimselfthegloryofprotectingsuchanoppressedinnocent.

Icouldnotbutbepleasedwithhim.AndIlethimknowthatIwas.Ihardlyexpectedsomuchspiritfromhim.Butaman'spassivenesstoa

belovedobjectofoursexmaynot,perhaps,arguewantofcourageonproperoccasions.

IthoughtIought,inreturn,tohavesomeconsiderationforhissafety,assuchanopenstepwoulddrawuponhimthevengeanceofthemostvillanousenterpriserintheworld,whohasalwaysagangoffellows,suchashimself,athiscall,readytosupportoneanotherinthevilestoutrages.Butyet,asMr.Hickmanmighthavestrengthenedhishandsbylegalrecourses,Ishouldnothavestooduponit,hadInotknownyourdelicacy,[sincesuchastepmusthavemadeagreatnoise,andgivenoccasionforscandal,asifsomeadvantagehadbeengainedoveryou,]andweretherenotthegreatestprobabilitythatallmightbemoresilently,andmoreeffectually,managed,byMrs.Townsend'smeans.

Mrs.Townsendwillinpersonattendyou--shehopes,onWednesday--herbrothers,andsomeoftheirpeople,willscatteringly,andasiftheyknewnothingofyou,[sowehavecontrived,]seeyousafenotonlytoLondon,buttoherhouseatDeptford.

Shehasakinswoman,whowilltakeyourcommandsthere,ifsheherselfbeobligedtoleaveyou.Andthereyoumaystay,tillthewretch'sfury,onlosingyou,andhissearch,areover.

Hewillverysoon,'tislikely,enteruponsomenewvillany,whichmayengrosshim:anditmaybegivenout,thatyouaregonetolayclaimtotheprotectionofyourcousinMordenatFlorence.

Possibly,ifhecanbemadetobelieveit,hewillgoover,inhopestofindyouthere.

Afterawhile,Icanprocureyoualodginginoneofourneighbouringvillages,whereImayhavethehappinesstobeyourdailyvisiter.AndifthisHickmanbenotsillyandapish,andifmymotherdonotdounaccountablethings,Imaythesoonerthinkofmarrying,thatImay,withoutcontroul,receiveandentertainthedarlingofmyheart.



Many,verymany,happydaysdoIhopeweshallyetseetogether;andasthisismyhope,Iexpectthatitwillbeyourconsolation.

Astoyourestate,sinceyouareresolvednottolitigateforit,wewillbepatient,eithertillColonelMordenarrives,ortillshamecompelssomepeopletobejust.

Uponthewhole,Icannotbutthinkyourprospectsnowmuchhappierthantheycouldhavebeen,hadyoubeenactuallymarriedtosuchamanasthis.Imustthereforecongratulateyouuponyourescape,notonlyfromahorridlibertine,butfromsovileahusband,ashemusthavemadetoanywoman;butmoreespeciallytoapersonofyourvirtueanddelicacy.

Youhatehim,heartilyhatehim,Ihope,mydear--Iamsureyoudo.Itwouldbestrange,ifsomuchpurityoflifeandmannerswerenottoabhorwhatissorepugnanttoitself.

Inyourletterbeforeme,youmentiononewrittentomeforafeint.*Ihavenotreceivedanysuch.Dependuponit,therefore,thathemusthaveit.Andifhehas,itisawonderthathedidnotlikewisegetmylongoneofthe7th.Heavenbepraisedthathedidnot;andthatitcamesafetoyourhands!

*SeeVol.V.LettersXXI.andXXII.

Isendthisbyayoungfellow,whosefatherisoneofourtenants,withcommandtodeliverittonootherhandsbutyour's.Heistoreturndirectly,ifyougivehimanyletter.Ifnot,hewillproceedtoLondonuponhisownpleasures.Heisasimplefellow;butveryhonest.Soyoumaysayanythingtohim.Ifyouwritenotbyhim,Idesirealineortwo,assoonaspossible.

Mymotherknowsnothingofhisgoingtoyou;noryetofyourabandoningthefellow.Forgiveme!Butheisnotentitledtogoodmanners.

IshalllongtohearhowyouandMrs.Townsendordermatters.Iwishshecouldhavebeenwithyousooner.ButIhavelostnotimeinengagingher,asyouwillsuppose.Irefertoher,whatIhavefurthertosayandadvise.Soshallconcludewithmyprayers,thatHeavenwilldirectandprotectmydearestcreature,andmakeyourfuturedayshappy!

ANNAHOWE.

Andnow,Jack,Iwillsupposethatthouhastreadthiscursedletter.Allowmetomakeafewobservationsuponsomeofitscontents.

ItisstrangetoMissHowe,thathavinggotherfriendatsuchashockingadvantage,&c.Anditisstrangetome,too.IfeverIhavesuchanotheropportunitygiventome,thecauseofbothourwonder,Ibelieve,willcease.

SothouseestTomlinsonisfurtherdetected.--NosuchpersonasMrs.Fretchville.--MaylightningfromHeaven--OLord,OLord,OLord!--Whatahorridvixenisthis!--Mygang,myremorselessgang,too,isbroughtin--andthouwiltpleadforthesegirlsagain;wiltthou?heavenbepraised,shesays,thatherfriendisoutofdanger--MissHoweshouldbesureof



that,andthatsheherselfissafe.--Butforthistermagant,(asIoftensaid,)Imustsurelyhavemadeabetterhandofit.--

Newstoriesofme,Jack!--Whatcantheybe?--IhavenotfoundthatmygenerositytomyRose-budeverdidmeduecreditwiththispairoffriends.Veryhard,Belford,thatcreditscannotbesetagainstdebits,andabalancestruckinarake'sfavour,aswellasinthatofeverycommonman!--Buthe,fromwhomnogoodisexpected,isnotallowedthemeritofthegoodhedoes.

IoughttohavebeenalittlemoreattentivetocharacterthanIhavebeen.For,notwithstandingthatthemeasuresofrightandwrongaresaidtobesomanifest,letmetellthee,thatcharacterbiasesandrunsawaywithallmankind.Letamanorwomanonceestablishthemselvesintheworld'sopinion,andallthateitherofthemdowillbesanctified.Nay,intheverycourtsofjustice,doesnotcharacteracquitorcondemnasoftenasfacts,andsometimeseveninspiteoffacts?--Yet,[impoliticthatIhavebeenandam!]tobesocarelessofmine!--Andnow,Idoubt,itisirretrievable.--Buttoleavemoralizing.

Thou,Jack,knowestalmostallmyenterprisesworthremembering.Canthisparticularstory,whichthisgirlhintsat,bethatofLucyVillars?--Orcanshehaveheardofmyintriguewiththeprettygipsey,whometmeinNorwood,andofthetrapIcaughthercruelhusbandin,[afellowas

gloomyandtyrannicalasoldHarlowe,]whenhepursuedawife,whowouldnothavedeservedillofhim,ifhehaddeservedwellofher!--Buthewasnotquitedrowned.Themanisaliveatthisday,andMissHowementionsthestoryasaveryshockingone.Besides,boththeseareatwelve-monthold,ormore.

Butevilfameandscandalarealwaysnew.Whentheoffenderhasforgotavilefact,itisoftentoldtooneandtoanother,who,havingneverheardofitbefore,trumpetitaboutasanoveltytoothers.ButwellsaidthehonestcorregidoratMadrid,[asayingwithwhichIencroachedLordM.'scollection,]--Goodactionsarerememberedbutforaday:badonesformanyyearsafterthelifeoftheguilty.Suchistherelishthattheworldhasforscandal.Inotherwords,suchisthedesirewhich

everyonehastoexculpatehimselfbyblackeninghisneighbour.YouandI,Belford,havebeenverykindtotheworld,infurnishingitwithopportunitiestogratifyitsdevil.

[MissHowewillabandonherownbetterprospects,andsharefortuneswithher,wereshetogoabroad.]--Charmingromancer!--Imustsetaboutthisgirl,Jack.Ihavealwayshadhopesofawomanwhosepassionscarryhertosuchaltitudes.--HadIattackedMissHowefirst,herpassions,(inflamedandguidedasIcouldhavemanagedthem,)wouldhavebroughtherintomylureinafortnight.

Butthinkestthou,[andyetIthinkthoudost,]thatthereisanythinginthesehighflightsamongthesex?--Verily,Jack,thesevehement

friendshipsarenothingbutchaffandstubble,liabletobeblownawaybytheverywindthatraisesthem.Apes,mereapesofus!theythinkthewordfriendshiphasaprettysoundwithit;anditismuchtalkedof--afashionableword.Andso,truly,asinglewoman,whothinksshehasasoul,andknowsthatshewantssomething,wouldbethoughttohavefoundafellow-soulforitinherownsex.ButIrepeat,thatthewordisamereword,thethingamerenamewiththem;acork-bottomedshuttle-cock,whichtheyarefondofstrikingtoandfro,tomakeoneanotherglowinthefrostyweatherofasingle-state;butwhich,whenamancomesinbetweenthepretendedinseparables,isgivenup,liketheirmusicand



othermaidenlyamusements;which,nevertheless,maybenecessarytokeeptheprettyroguesoutofactivemischief.Theythen,inshort,havingcaughtthefish,layasidethenet.*

*Healludesheretothestoryofapope,who,(onceapoorfisherman,)througheveryprefermentheroseto,eventothatofthecardinalate,hungupinviewofallhisguestshisnet,asatokenofhumility.But,whenhearrivedatthepontificate,hetookitdown,saying,thattherewasnoneedofthenet,whenhehadcaughtthefish.

Thouhastamind,perhaps,tomakeanexceptionforthesetwoladies.--Withallmyheart.MyClarissahas,ifwomanhas,asoulcapableoffriendship.Herflameisbrightandsteady.ButMissHowe's,wereitnotkeptupbyhermother'sopposition,istoovehementtoendure.HowoftenhaveIknownoppositionnotonlycementfriendship,butcreatelove?IdoubtnotbutpoorHickmanwouldfarethebetterwiththisvixen,ifhermotherwereasheartilyagainsthim,assheisforhim.

Thusmuch,indeed,astothesetwoladies,Iwillgrantthee,thattheactivespiritoftheone,andthemeekdispositionoftheother,maymaketheirfriendshipmoredurablethanitwouldotherwisebe;forthisiscertain,thatineveryfriendship,whethermaleorfemale,theremustbe

amanandawomanspirit,(thatistosay,oneofthemmustbeaforbearingone,)tomakeitpermanent.

ButthisIpronounce,asatruth,whichallexperienceconfirms,thatfriendshipbetweenwomenneverholdstothesacrificeofcapitalgratifications,ortotheendangeringoflife,limb,orestate,asitoftendoesinournoblersex.

Well,butnextcomesanindictmentagainstpoorbeauty!WhathasbeautydonethatMissHoweshouldbeoffendedatit?--MissHowe,Jack,isacharminggirl.Shehasnoreasontoquarrelwithbeauty!--Didsteverseeher?--Toomuchfireandspiritinhereye,indeed,foragirl!--Butthat'snofaultwithamanthatcanlowerthatfireandspiritat

pleasure;andIknowIamthemanthatcan.

Formyownpart,whenIwasfirstintroducedtothislady,whichwasbymygoddesswhensheherselfwasavisiteratMrs.Howe's,Ihadnotbeenhalfanhourwithher,butIevenhungeredandthirstedafteraromping'boutwiththelivelyrogue;and,inthesecondorthirdvisit,wasmoredeterredbythedelicacyofherfriend,thanbywhatIapprehendedfromherown.Thischarmingcreature'spresence,thoughtI,awesusboth.AndIwishedherabsence,thoughanyotherwomanwerepresent,thatImighttrythedifferencesinMissHowe'sbehaviourbeforeherfriend'sface,orbehindherback.

Delicatewomenmakedelicatewomen,aswellasdecentmen.WithallMiss

Howe'sfireandspirit,itwaseasytosee,byherveryeye,thatshewatchedforlessonsandfearedreprooffromthepenetratingeyeofhermilderdispositionedfriend;*andyetitwasaseasytoobserve,inthecandourandsweetmannersoftheother,thatthefearwhichMissHowestoodinofher,wasmoreowingtoherowngenerousapprehensionthatshefellshortofherexcellencies,thantoMissHarlowe'sconsciousnessofexcellenceoverher.IhaveoftensinceIcameatMissHowe'sletters,revolvedthisjustandfinepraisecontainedinoneofthem:**'Everyonesawthatthepreferencetheygaveyoutothemselvesexaltedyounotintoanyvisibletriumphoverthem;foryouhadalwayssomethingtosay,on



everypointyoucarried,thatraisedtheyieldingheart,andlefteveryonepleasedandsatisfiedwiththemselves,thoughtheycarriednotoffthepalm.'

*MissHowe,inVol.III.LetterXIX.says,ThatshewasalwaysmoreafraidofClarissathanofhermother;and,inVol.III.LetterXLIV.Thatshefearsheralmostasmuchasshelovesher;andinmanyotherplaces,inherletters,verifiesthisobservationofLovelace.**SeeVol.IV.LetterXXXI.

AsIpropose,inamoreadvancedlife,toendeavourtoatoneformyusefulfreedomswithindividualsofthesex,bygivingcautionsandinstructionstothewhole,Ihavemadeamemorandumtoenlargeuponthisdoctrine;--towit,thatitisfullasnecessarytodirectdaughtersinthechoiceoftheirfemalecompanions,asitistoguardthemagainstthedesignsofmen.

Isaynotthis,however,tothedisparagementofMissHowe.Shehasfrompride,whatherfriendhasfromprinciple.[TheLordhelpthesex,iftheyhadnotpride!]ButyetIamconfident,thatMissHoweisindebtedtotheconversationandcorrespondenceofMissHarloweforherhighestimprovements.But,boththeseladiesoutofthequestion,Imakeno

scrupletoaver,[andI,Jack,shouldknowsomethingofthematter,]thattherehavebeenmoregirlsruined,atleastpreparedforruin,bytheirownsex,(takinginservants,aswellascompanions,)thandirectlybytheattemptsanddelusionsofmen.

ButitistimeenoughwhenIamoldandjoyless,toenlargeuponthistopic.

Astothecomparisonbetweenthetwoladies,Iwillexpatiatemoreonthatsubject,(forIlikeit,)whenIhavehadthemboth.Whichthisletterofthevixengirl's,Ihopethouwiltallow,warrantsmetotryfor.

Ireturntotheconsiderationofafewmoreofitscontents,tojustifymyvengeancessonearlynowinview.

AstoMrs.Townsend,--hermanlikespirit--hertwobrothers--andtheships'crews--Isaynothingbutthistotheinsolentthreatening--Let'emcome!--Butastohersordidmenace--Torepaythehorridvillain,asshecallsme,forallmyvilenessbyBROKENBONES!--Brokenbones,Belford!--Whocanbearthisporterlythreatening!--Brokenbones,Jack!--D--nthelittlevulgar!--Givemeanameforher--butIbanishallfuriousresentment.IfIgetthesetwogirlsintomypower,HeavenforbidthatIshouldbeasecondPhalaris,whoturnedhisbullupontheartist!--Nobonesoftheir'swillIbreak--Theyshallcomeoffwithmeuponmuchlighterterms!--

Butthesefellowsaresmugglers,itseems.AndamnotIasmugglertoo?--Iam--andhavenottheleastdoubtbutIshallhavesecuredmygoodsbeforeThursday,orWednesdayeither.

ButdidIwantaplot,whatacharmingnewonedoesthisletterofMissHowestrikemeout!Iamalmostsorry,thatIhavefixeduponone.--Forhere,howeasywoulditbeformetoassembleacrewofswabbers,andtocreateaMrs.Townsend(whoseperson,thouseest,mybelovedknowsnot)tocomeonTuesday,atMissHowe'srepeatedsolicitations,inorderto



carrymybelovedtoawarehouseofmyownproviding?

This,however,ismytriumphanthope,thatattheverytimethattheseragamuffinswillbeatHampstead(lookingforus)mydearMissHarloweandI[sotheFatesIimaginehaveordained]shallbefastasleepineachother'sarmsintown.--Liestill,villain,tillthetimecomes.--Myheart,Jack!myheart!--Itisalwaysthumpingawayontheremotestprospectsofthisnature.

Butitseemsthatthevilenessofthisspeciousmonster[meaningme,Jack!]hasbroughtHickmanintocreditwithher.SoIhavedonesomegood!ButtowhomIcannottell:forthispoorfellow,shouldIpermithimtohavethistermagant,willbepunished,asmanytimesweallare,bytheenjoymentofhisownwishes--norcanshebehappy,asItakeit,withhim,werehetogovernhimselfbyherwill,andhavenoneofhisown;sinceneverwasthereadirectingwifewhoknewwheretostop:powermakessuchaonewanton--shedespisesthemanshecangovern.LikeAlexander,whowept,thathehadnomoreworldstoconquer,shewillbelookingoutfornewexercisesforherpower,tillshegrowuneasytoherself,adiscredittoherhusband,andaplaguetoallabouther.

Butthishonestfellow,itseems,withtearsinhiseyes,andwithhumbleprostration,besoughtthevixentopermithimtosetoutinhischariot-and-four,inordertogivehimselfthegloryofprotectingsuchan

oppressedinnocent,inthefaceofthewholeworld.Nay,hereddened,itseems:andtrembledtoo!ashereadthefaircomplainant'sletter.--Howvaliantisallthis!--Womenlovebravemen;andnowonderthathistears,histrembling,andhisprostration,gavehimhighreputationwiththemeekMissHowe.

Butdostthink,Jack,thatIinthelikecase(andequallyaffectedwiththedistress)shouldhaveactedthus?Dostthink,thatIshouldnotfirsthaverescuedthelady,andthen,ifneedful,haveaskedexcuseforit,theladyinmyhand?--Wouldstnotthouhavedonethus,aswellasI?

But,'tisbestasitis.HonestHickmanmaynowsleepinawholeskin.Andyetthatismoreperhapsthanhewouldhavedone(thelady's

deliveranceunattempted)hadIcomeatthisrequestedpermissionofhisanyotherwaythanbyaletterthatitmustnotbeknownthatIhaveintercepted.

MissHowethinksImaybedivertedfrompursuingmycharmer,bysomenew-startedvillany.Villanyisawordthatsheisextremelyfondof.ButIcantellher,thatitisimpossibleIshould,tilltheendofthisvillanybeobtained.Difficultyisastimuluswithsuchaspiritasmine.IthoughtMissHoweknewmebetter.Wereshetoofferherself,personforperson,intheromancingzealofherfriendship,tosaveherfriend,itshouldnotdo,whilethedearcreatureisonthissidethemoon.

ShethanksHeaven,thatherfriendhasreceivedherletterofthe7th.

Weareallgladofit.Sheoughttothankmetoo.ButIwillnotatpresentclaimherthanks.

Butwhensherejoicesthattheletterwentsafe,doesshenot,ineffect,calloutforvengeance,andexpectit!--Allingoodtime,MissHowe.WhensettestthououtfortheIsleofWight,love?

Iwillcloseatthistimewithdesiringtheetomakealistofthevirulenttermswithwhichtheenclosedletterabounds:andthen,ifthousupposestthatIhavemadesuchanother,andhaveaddedtoitallthe



flowersofthesameblow,intheformerlettersofthesamesaucycreature,andthoseinthatofMissHarlowe,whichsheleftformeonherelopement,thouwiltcertainlythink,thatIhaveprovocationssufficienttojustifymeinallthatIshalldotoeither.

Returntheenclosedthemomentthouhastperusedit.

LETTERVIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SUNDAYNIGHT--MONDAYMORNING.

Iwentdownwithrevengeinmyheart,thecontentsofMissHowe'sletteralmostengrossingme,themomentthatMissHarloweandMrs.Moore(accompaniedbyMissRawlins)camein:butinmycountenanceallthegentle,theplacid,theserene,thattheglasscouldteach;andinmybehaviourallthepolite,thatsuchanunpolitecreature,asshehasoftentoldmeIam,couldputon.

MissRawlinswassentforhomealmostassoonasshecamein,toentertainanunexpectedvisiter;tohergreatregret,aswellastothe

disappointmentofmyfair-one,asIcouldperceivefromthelooksofboth:fortheyhadagreed,itseems,ifIwenttotown,asIsaidIintendedtodo,totakeawalkupontheHeath,atleastinMrs.Moore'sgarden;andwhoknows,whatmighthavebeentheissue,hadthespiritofcuriosityintheonemetwiththespiritofcommunicationintheother?

MissRawlinspromisedtoreturn,ifpossible:butsenttoexcuseherself:hervisiterintendingtostaywithherallnight.

Irejoicedinmyheartathermessage;and,aftermuchsupplication,obtainedthefavourofmybeloved'scompanyforanotherwalkinthegarden,having,asItoldher,abundanceofthingstosay,topropose,andtobeinformedof,inorderultimatelytogovernmyselfinmyfuture

steps.

Shehadvouchsafed,Ishouldhavetoldthee,witheyesturnedfromme,andinahalf-asideattitude,tosiptwodishesofteainmycompany--Dearsoul!--Howangerunpolishesthemostpolite!forIneversawMissHarlowebehavesoawkwardly.Iimaginedsheknewnothowtobeawkward.

Whenwewereinthegarden,Ipouredmywholesoulintoherattentiveear;andbesoughtherreturningfavour.

Shetoldme,thatshehadformedherschemeforherfuturelife:that,vileasthetreatmentwaswhichshehadreceivedfromme,thatwasnotallthereasonshehadforrejectingmysuit:butthat,onthematurest

deliberation,shewasconvincedthatshecouldneitherbehappywithme,normakemehappy;andsheinjoinedme,forbothoursakes,tothinknomoreofher.

TheCaptain,Itoldher,wasriddownpost,inamanner,toforwardmywisheswithheruncle.--LadyBettyandMissMontaguewereundoubtedlyarrivedintownbythistime.Iwouldsetoutearlyinthemorningtoattendthem.Theyadoredher.Theylongedtoseeher.Theywouldseeher.--TheywouldnotbedeniedhercompanyinOxfordshire.Whithercouldshebettergo,tobefreefromherbrother'sinsults?--Whither,tobe



absolutelymadeunapprehensiveofanybodyelse?--MightIhaveanyhopesofherreturningfavour,ifMissHowecouldbeprevailedupontointercedeforme?

MissHoweprevailedupontointercedeforyou!repeatedshe,withascornfulbridle,butaveryprettyone.--Andthereshestopt.

IrepeatedtheconcernitwouldbetometobeunderanecessityofmentioningthemisunderstandingtoLadyBettyandmycousin,asamisunderstandingstilltobemadeup;andasifIwereofverylittleconsequencetoadearcreaturewhowasofsomuchtome;urging,thatthesecircumstanceswouldextremelylowermenotonlyinmyownopinion,butinthatofmyrelations.

ButstillshereferredtoMissHowe'snextletter;andalltheconcessionIcouldbringhertointhiswholeconference,was,thatshewouldwaitthearrivalandvisitofthetwoladies,iftheycameinadayortwo,orbeforeshereceivedtheexpectedletterfromMissHowe.

ThankHeavenforthis!thoughtI.AndnowmayIgototownwithhopesatmyreturntofindthee,dearest,whereIshallleavethee.

Butyet,asshemayfindreasonstochangehermindinmyabsence,Ishallnotentirelytrusttothis.Myfellow,therefore,whoisinthe

house,andwho,byMrs.Bevis'skindintelligence,willknoweverystepshecantake,shallhaveAndrewandahorseready,togivemeimmediatenoticeofhermotions;andmoreover,gowhithershewill,heshallbeoneofherretinue,thoughunknowntoherself,ifpossible.

ThiswasallIcouldmakeofthefairinexorable.ShouldIbegladofit,orsorryforit?--

GladIbelieve:andyetmyprideisconfoundedlyabated,tothinkthatIhadsolittleholdintheaffectionsofthisdaughteroftheHarlowes.

Don'ttellmethatvirtueandprincipleareherguidesonthisoccasion!--'Tispride,agreaterpridethanmyown,thatgovernsher.Love,she

hasnone,thouseest;noreverhad;atleastnotinasuperiordegree.Love,thatdeservesthename,neverwasunderthedominionofprudence,orofanyreasoningpower.Shecannotbeartobethoughtawoman,Iwarrant!Andif,inthelastattempt,Ifindhernotone,whatwillshebetheworseforthetrial?--Nooneistoblameforsufferinganevilhecannotshunoravoid.

Wereageneraltobeoverpowered,androbbedbyahighwayman,wouldhebelessfitforthecommandofanarmyonthataccount?--Ifindeedthegeneral,pretendinggreatvalour,andhavingboastedthatheneverwouldberobbed,weretomakebutfaintresistancewhenhewasbroughttothetest,andtoyieldhispursewhenhewasmasterofhisownsword,thenindeedwillthehighwaymanwhorobshimbethoughtthebraverman.

ButfromtheselastconferencesamIfurnishedwithoneargumentindefenceofmyfavouritepurpose,whichIneveryetpleaded.

OJack!whatadifficultymustamanbeallowedtohavetoconquerapredominantpassion,beitwhatitwill,whenthegratifyingofitisinhispower,howeverwrongheknowsittobetoresolvetogratifyit!Reflectuponthis;andthenwiltthoubeabletoaccountfor,ifnottoexcuse,aprojectedcrime,whichhashabittopleadforit,inabreastasstormyasuncontroulable!



Thisthatfollowsismynewargument--

Shouldshefailinthetrial;shouldIsucceed;andshouldsherefusetogoonwithme;andevenresolvenottomarryme(ofwhichIcanhavenonotion);andshouldshedisdaintobeobligedtomeforthehandsomeprovisionIshouldbeproudtomakeforher,eventothehalfofmyestate;yetcannotshebealtogetherunhappy--Isshenotentitledtoanindependentfortune?WillnotCol.Morden,ashertrustee,putherinpossessionofit?Anddidshenotinourformerconferencepointoutthewayoflife,thatshealwayspreferredtothemarriedlife--towit,'TotakehergoodNortonforherdirectressandguide,andtoliveuponherownestateinthemannerhergrandfatherdesiredsheshouldlive?'*

*SeeLetterIII.ofthisvolume.

Itismoreovertobeconsideredthatshecannot,accordingtoherownnotions,recoveraboveonehalfofherfame,werewenottointermarry;somuchdoesshethinkshehassufferedbyhergoingoffwithme.Andwillshenotbealwaysrepiningandmourningforthelossoftheotherhalf?--Andifshemustlivealifeofsuchuneasinessandregretforhalf,mayshenotaswellrepineandmournforthewhole?

Nor,letmetellthee,willherownschemeorpenitence,inthiscase,behalfsoperfect,ifshedonotfall,asifshedoes:forwhatafoolishpenitentwillshemake,whohasnothingtorepentof!--Shepiquesherself,thouknowest,andmakesitmatterofreproachtome,thatshewentnotoffwithmebyherownconsent;butwastrickedoutofherself.

Norupbraidthoumeuponthemeditatedbreachofvowssorepeatedlymade.Shewillnot,thouseest,permitmetofulfilthem.Andifshewould,thisIhavetosay,that,atthetimeImadethemostsolemnofthem,Iwasfullydeterminedtokeepthem.Butwhatprincethinkshimselfobligedanylongertoobservethearticlesoftreaties,themostsacredlyswornto,thansuitswithhisinterestorinclination;althoughthe

consequenceoftheinfractionmustbe,asheknows,thedestructionofthousands.

Isnotthisthentheresultofall,thatMissClarissaHarlowe,ifitbenotherownfault,maybeasvirtuousaftershehaslostherhonour,asitiscalled,asshewasbefore?Shemaybeamoreeminentexampletohersex;andifsheyield(alittleyield)inthetrial,maybeacompleterpenitent.Norcanshe,butbyherownwilfulness,bereducedtolowfortunes.

Andthusmayheroldnurseandshe;anoldcoachman;andapairofoldcoach-horses;andtwoorthreeoldmaid-servants,andperhapsaveryoldfootmanortwo,(foreverythingwillbeoldandpenitentialabouther,)

liveverycomfortablytogether;readingoldsermons,andoldprayer-books;andrelievingoldmenandoldwomen;andgivingoldlessons,andoldwarnings,uponnewsubjects,aswellasoldones,totheyoungladiesofherneighbourhood;andsopassontoagoodoldage,doingagreatdealofgoodbothbypreceptandexampleinhergeneration.

Andisawomanwhocanlivethusprettilywithoutcontroul;whoeverdidprefer,andwhostillprefers,thesingletothemarriedlife;andwhowillbeenabledtodoeverythingthattheplanshehadformedwilldirecthertodo;tobesaidtoberuined,undone,andsuchsortof



stuff?--Ihavenopatiencewiththeprettyfools,whousethosestrongwords,todescribeatransitoryevil;anevilwhichamerechurch-formmakesnone?

Atthisrateofromancing,howmanyflourishingruinsdostthou,aswellasI,know?Letusbutlookaboutus,andweshallseesomeofthehaughtiestandmostcensoriousspiritsamongoutacquaintanceofthatsexnowpassingforchastewives,ofwhomstrangestoriesmightbetold;andothers,whosehusbands'heartshavebeenmadetoachefortheirgaieties,bothbeforeandaftermarriage;andyetknownothalfsomuchofthem,assomeofushonestfellowscouldtellthem.

But,havingthussatisfiedmyselfinrelationtotheworstthatcanhappentothischarmingcreature;andthatitwillbeherownfault,ifshebeunhappy;Ihavenotatallreflecteduponwhatislikelytobemyownlot.

Thishasalwaysbeenmynotion,thoughMissHowegrudgesusrakesthebestofthesex,andsays,thattheworstistoogoodforus,*thatthewifeofalibertineoughttobepure,spotless,uncontaminated.Towhatpurposehassuchaonelivedafreelife,buttoknowtheworld,andtomakehisadvantagesofit!--And,tobeveryserious,itwouldbeamisfortunetothepublicfortwopersons,headsofafamily,tobebothbad;since,betweentwosuch,araceofvarletsmightbepropagated

(LovelacesandBelfords,ifthouwilt)whomightdogreatmischiefintheworld.

ThouseestatbottomthatIamnotanabandonedfellow;andthatthereisamixtureofgravityinme.This,asIgrowolder,mayincrease;andwhenmyactivecapacitybeginstoabate,Imaysitdownwiththepreacher,andresolveallmypastlifeintovanityandvexationofspirit.

Thisiscertain,thatIshallneverfindawomansowellsuitedtomytasteasMissClarissaHarlowe.IonlywishthatImayhavesuchaladyashertocomfortandadornmysettingsun.Ihaveoftenthoughtitveryunhappyforusboth,thatsoexcellentacreaturesprangupalittletoo

lateformysettingout,andalittletooearlyinmyprogress,beforeIcanthinkofreturning.Andyet,asIhavepickedupthesweettravellerinmyway,Icannothelpwishingthatshewouldbearmecompanyintherestofmyjourney,althoughsheweresteppingoutofherownpathtoobligeme.Andthen,perhaps,wecouldputupintheeveningatthesameinn;andbeveryhappyineachother'sconversation;recountingthedifficultiesanddangerswehadpassedinourwaytoit.

Iimaginethatthouwiltbeapttosuspectthatsomepassagesinthisletterwerewrittenintown.Why,Jack,IcannotbutsaythattheWestminsterairisalittlegrosserthanthatatHampstead;andtheconversationofMrs.SinclairandthenymphslessinnocentthanMrs.Moore'sandMissRawlins's.AndIthinkinmyheartIcansayandwrite

thosethingsatoneplacewhichIcannotattheother,norindeedanywhereelse.

Icametotownaboutseventhismorning--allnecessarydirectionsandprecautionsrememberedtobegiven.

IbesoughtthefavourofanaudiencebeforeIsetout.Iwasdesiroustoseewhichofherlovelyfacesshewaspleasedtoputon,afteranothernighthadpassed.Butshewasresolved,Ifound,toleaveourquarrelopen.Shewouldnotgivemeanopportunitysomuchastoentreather



againtocloseit,beforethearrivalofLadyBettyandmycousin.

Ihadnoticefrommyproctor,byafewlinesbroughtbyamanandhorse,justbeforeIsetout,thatalldifficultieshadbeenfortwodayspastsurmounted;andthatImighthavethelicenseforfetching.

Isentupthelettertomybeloved,byMrs.Bevis,witharepeatedrequestforadmittancetoherpresenceuponit;butneitherdidthisstandmeinstead.Isupposeshethoughtitwouldbeallowingoftheconsequencesthatwerenaturallytobeexpectedtofollowtheobtainingofthisinstrument,ifshehadconsentedtoseemeonthecontentsofthisletter,havingrefusedmethathonourbeforeIsentituptoher.--Nosurprisingher.--Noadvantagetobetakenofherinattentiontothenicestcircumstances.

Andnow,Belford,Isetoutuponbusiness.

LETTERIX

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.MONDAY,JUNE12.

Dursteverseealicense,Jack?

'Edmund,bydivinepermission,LordBishopofLondon,toourwell-belovedinChrist,RobertLovelace,[yourservant,mygoodLord!WhathaveIdonetomeritsomuchgoodness,whoneversawyourLordshipinmylife?]oftheparishofSt.Martin'sintheFields,bachelor,andClarissaHarlowe,ofthesameparish,spinster,sendethgreeting.--WHEREASyeare,asisalleged,determinedtoenterintotheholystateofMatrimony[thisisonlyalleged,thouobservest]byandwiththeconsentof,&c.&c.&c.andareverydesirousofobtainingyourmarriagetobesolemnizedinthefaceofthechurch:Wearewillingthatyourhonestdesires[honestdesires,Jack!]maymorespeedilyhavetheirdueeffect:andtherefore,

thatyemaybeabletoprocuresuchMarriagetobefreelyandlawfullysolemnizedintheparishchurchofSt.Martin'sintheFields,orSt.Giles'sintheFields,inthecountyofMiddlesex,bytheRector,Vicar,orCuratethereof,atanytimeoftheyear,[atANYtimeoftheyear,Jack!]withoutpublicationofbans:Provided,thatbyreasonofanypre-contract,[IverilythinkthatIhavehadthreeorfourpre-contractsinmytime;butthegoodgirlshavenotclaimeduponthemofalongwhile,]consanguinity,affinity,oranyotherlawfulcausewhatsoever,therebenolawfulimpedimentonthisbehalf;andthattherebenotatthistimeanyaction,suit,plaint,quarrel,ordemand,movedordependingbeforeanyjudgeecclesiasticalortemporal,fororconcerninganymarriagecontractedbyorwitheitherofyou;andthatthesaidmarriagebeopenlysolemnizedinthechurchabove-mentioned,betweenthehoursof

eightandtwelveintheforenoon;andwithoutprejudicetotheministeroftheplacewherethesaidwomanisaparishioner:Wedohereby,forgoodcauses,[itcostme--letmesee,Jack--whatdiditcostme?]giveandgrantourLicense,aswelltoyouastothepartiescontracting,astotheRector,Vicar,orCurateofthesaidchurch,wherethesaidmarriageisintendedtobesolemnized,tosolemnizethesame,inmannerandformabovespecified,accordingtotheritesandceremoniesprescribedintheBookofCommonPrayerinthatbehalfpublishedbyauthorityofParliament.Providedalways,thatifhereafteranyfraudshallappeartohavebeencommitted,atthetimeofgrantingthisLicense,eitherbyfalse



suggestions,orconcealmentofthetruth,[nowthis,Belford,isalittleharduponus;forIcannotsaythateveryoneofoursuggestionsisliterallytrue:--so,ingoodconscience,IoughtnottomarryunderthisLicense;]theLicenseshallbevoidtoallintentsandpurposes,asifthesamehadnotbeengranted.Andinthatcasewedoinhibitallministerswhatsoever,ifanythingofthepremisesshallcometotheirknowledge,fromproceedingtothecelebrationofthesaidMarriage;withoutfirstconsultingUs,orourVicar-general.Given,'&c.

Thenfollowtheregister'sname,andalargependentseal,withthesewordsroundit--SEALOFTHEVICAR-GENERALANDOFFICIALPRINCIPALOFTHEDIOCESEOFLONDON.

Agoodwhimsicalinstrument,takeitaltogether!Butwhat,thinkestthou,arethearmstothismatrimonialharbinger?--Why,inthefirstplace,twocrossedswords;toshowthatmarriageisastateofoffenceaswellasdefence;threelions;todenotethatthosewhoenterintothestateoughttohaveatripleproportionofcourage.And[couldstthouhaveimaginedthatthesepriestlyfellows,insosolemnacase,wouldcuttheirjokesuponpoorsoulswhocametohavetheirhonestdesiresputinawaytobegratified;]therearethreecrookedhorns,smartlytop-knottedwithribands;whichbeingtheladies'wear,seemtoindicatethattheymayveryprobablyadorn,aswellasbestow,thebull'sfeather.

Todescribeitaccordingtoheraldryart,ifIamnotmistaken--gules,twoswords,saltire-wise,or;secondcoat,achevronsablebetweenthreebugle-horns,OR[soitoughttobe]:onachiefofthesecond,threelionsrampantofthefirst--butthedeviltakethemfortheirhieroglyphics,shouldIsay,ifIweredeterminedingoodearnesttomarry!

AnddeterminedtomarryIwouldbe,wereitnotforthisconsideration,thatoncemarried,andIammarriedforlife.

That'stheplagueofit!--Couldamandoasthebirdsdo,changeeveryValentine'sday,[anaturalappointment!forbirdshavenotthesense,forsooth,tofetterthemselves,aswewiseacrementakegreatandsolemn

painstodo,]therewouldbenothingatallinit.Andwhataglorioustimewouldthelawyershave,ontheonehand,withtheirnoveriniuniversi's,andsuitscommenceableonrestitutionofgoodsandchattels;andtheparsons,ontheother,withtheirindulgencies[renewableannually,asotherlicenses]tothehonestdesiresoftheirclients?

Then,wereastatedmullet,accordingtorankorfortune,tobepaidoneverychange,towardstheexigenciesofthestate[butnoneonrenewalswiththeoldlives,forthesakeofencouragingconstancy,especiallyamongtheminores]thechangewouldbemadesufficientlydifficult,andthewholepublicwouldbethebetterforit;whilethosechildren,whichtheparentscouldnotagreeaboutmaintaining,mightbeconsideredasthechildrenofthepublic,andprovidedforlikethechildrenoftheantient

Spartans;whowere(asourswouldinthiscasebe)anationofheroes.How,Jack,couldIhaveimproveduponLycurgus'sinstitutionshadIbeenalawgiver!

DidInevershowtheeaschemewhichIdrewuponsuchanotionasthis?--InwhichIdemonstratedtheconveniencies,andobviatedtheinconveniencies,ofchangingthepresentmodetothis?IbelieveIneverdid.

IrememberIprovedtoademonstration,thatsuchachangewouldbea



meanofannihilating,absolutelyannihilating,fourorfiveveryatrociousandcapitalsins.--Rapes,vulgarlysocalled;adultery,andfornication;norwouldpolygamybepantedafter.Frequentlywoulditpreventmurdersandduelling;hardlyanysuchthingasjealousy(thecauseofshockingviolences)wouldbeheardof:andhypocrisybetweenmanandwifebebanishedthebosomsofeach.Nor,probably,wouldthereproachofbarrennessrest,asitnowtoooftendoes,whereitisleastdeserved.--Norwouldtherepossiblybesuchapersonasabarrenwoman.

Moreover,whatamultitudeofdomesticquarrelswouldbeavoided,wheresuchaschemecarriedintoexecution?Sincebothsexeswouldbearwitheachother,intheviewthattheycouldhelpthemselvesinafewmonths.

Andthenwhatacharmingsubjectforconversationwouldbethegallantandgenerouslastpartingsbetweenmanandwife!Each,perhaps,anewmateineye,andrejoicingsecretlyinthemanumission,couldaffordtobecomplaisantlysorrowfulinappearance.'Hepresentedherwiththisjewel,itwillbesaidbythereporter,forexamplesake:shehimwiththat.Howhewept!Howshesobb'd!Howtheylookedafteroneanother!'Yet,that'sthejestofit,neitherofthemwishingtostandanothertwelvemonth'strial.

Andifgiddyfellows,orgiddygirls,misbehaveinafirstmarriage,whetherfromnoviceship,havingexpectedtofindmoreinthematterthan

canbefound;orfromperversenessonherpart,orpositivenessonhis,eachbeingmistakenintheother[amightydifference,Jack,inthesameperson,aninmateoravisiter];whatafineopportunitywilleachhave,bythisscheme,ofrecoveringalostcharacter,andofsettingallrightinthenextadventure?

And,OJack!withwhatjoy,withwhatrapture,wouldthechangelings(orchangeables,ifthoulikethatwordbetter)numbertheweeks,thedays,thehours,astheannualobligationapproachedtoitsdesirableperiod!

Asforthespleenorvapours,nosuchmaladywouldbeknownorheardof.Thephysicaltribewould,indeed,bethesufferers,andtheonlysufferers;sincefreshhealthandfreshspirits,theconsequencesof

sweetbloodandsweethumours(themindandbodycontinuallypleasedwitheachother)wouldperpetuallyflowin;andthejoysofexpectation,thehighestofallourjoys,wouldinvigorateandkeepallalive.

But,thatnobodyofmenmightsuffer,thephysicians,Ithought,mightturnparsons,astherewouldbeagreatdemandforparsons.Besides,astheywouldbepartakersinthegeneralbenefit,theymustbesorryfellowsindeediftheypreferredthemselvestothepublic.

Everyonewouldbemarriedadozentimesatleast.Bothmenandwomenwouldbecarefuloftheircharactersandpoliteintheirbehaviour,aswellasdelicateintheirpersons,andelegantintheirdress,[agreatmatteeachofthese,letmetellthee,tokeeppassionalive,]eitherto

inducearenewalwiththeoldlove,ortorecommendthemselvestoanew.Whilethenewspaperswouldbecrowdedwithparagraphs;alltheworldtheirreaders,asalltheworldwouldbeconcernedtoseewhoandwho'stogether--

'Yesterday,forinstance,enteredintotheholystateofmatrimony,'[weshouldallspeakreverentlyofmatrimony,then,]'therightHonourableRobertEarlLovelace'[Ishallbeanearlbythattime,]'withherGracetheDuchessDowagerofFifty-manors;hisLordship'sone-and-thirtiethwife.'--Ishallthenbecontented,perhaps,totakeup,asitiscalled,



withawidow.Butshemustnothavehadmorethanonehusbandneither.ThouknowestthatIamniceintheseparticulars.

Iknow,Jack,thatthouforthypart,wiltapproveofmyscheme.

AsLordM.andI,betweenus,havethreeorfourboroughsatcommand,IthinkIwillgetintoparliament,inordertobringinabillforthisgoodpurpose.

Neitherwillthehouseofparliament,northehousesofconvocation,havereasontoobjectit.Andallthecourts,whetherspiritualorsensual,civiloruncivil,willfindtheiraccountinitwhenpassedintoalaw.

Bymysoul,Jack,Ishouldbeapprehensiveofageneralinsurrection,andthatincitedbythewomen,weresuchabilltobethrownout.--Forhereistheexcellencyofthescheme:thewomenwillhaveequalreasonwiththementobepleasedwithit.

Dostthink,thatoldprerogativeHarlowe,forexample,mustnot,ifsuchalawwereinbeing,havepulledinhishorns?--Soexcellentawifeashehas,wouldneverelsehaverenewedwithsuchagloomytyrant:who,aswellasallothermarriedtyrants,musthavebeenupongoodbehaviourfromyeartoyear.

Atermagantwife,ifsuchalawweretopass,wouldbeaphoenix.Thechurcheswouldbetheonlymarket-placeforthefairsex;anddomesticexcellencethecapitalrecommendation.

NorwouldtherebeanoldmaidinGreatBritain,andallitsterritories.Forwhatanoddsoulmustshebewhocouldnothavehertwelvemonth'strial?

Inshort,atotalalterationforthebetter,inthemoralsandwayoflifeinbothsexes,must,inaveryfewyears,betheconsequenceofsuchasalutarylaw.

Whowouldhaveexpectedsuchaonefromme!Iwishthedevilowemenotaspiteforit.

Thewouldnotthedistinctionbeverypretty,Jack?asinflowers;--suchagentleman,orsuchalady,isanANNUAL--suchaoneisaPERENNIAL.

Onedifficulty,however,asIremember,occurredtome,upontheprobabilitythatawifemightbeenceinte,asthelawyerscallit.ButthusIobviatedit--

Thatnomanshouldbeallowedtomarryanotherwomanwithouthisthenwife'sconsent,tillshewerebrought-to-bed,andhehaddefrayedallincidentcharges;andtillitwasagreeduponbetweenthemwhetherthe

childshouldbehis,her's,orthepublic's.ThewomeninthiscasetohavewhatIcallthecoerciveoption;forIwouldnothaveitintheman'spowertobeadogneither.

And,indeed,Igavetheturnofthescaleineverypartofmyschemeinthewomen'sfavour:fordearlydoIlovethesweetrogues.

Howinfinitelymorepreferablethismyschemetothepolygamyoneoftheoldpatriarchs;whohadwivesandconcubineswithoutnumber!--IbelieveDavidandSolomonhadtheirhundredsatatime.Hadtheynot,Jack?



Letmeadd,thatannualparliaments,andannualmarriages,aretheprojectsnextmyheart.HowcouldIexpatiateuponthebenefitsthatwouldarisefromboth!

LETTERX


Well,butnowmyplotsthicken;andmyemploymentofwritingtotheeonthissubjectwillsooncometoaconclusion.Fornow,havinggotthelicense;andMrs.Townsendwithhertars,beingtocometoHampsteadnextWednesdayorThursday;andanotherletterpossibly,ormessagefromMissHowe,toinquirehowMissHarlowedoes,upontherustic'sreportofherillhealth,andtoexpressherwonderthatshehasnotheardformherinanswertoher'sonherescape;Imustsoonblowupthelady,orbeblownupmyself.AndsoIampreparing,withLadyBettyandmycousinMontague,towaituponmybelovedwithacoach-and-four,orasett;forLadyBettywillnotstiroutwithapairfortheworld;thoughbutfortwoorthreemiles.Andthisisawell-knownpartofhercharacter.

Butastothearmsandcrestuponthecoachandtrappings?DostthounotknowthataBlunt'smustsupplyher,whileherownisnewliningandrepairing?Anopportunitysheiswillingtotakenowsheisintown.Nothingofthiskindcanbedonetohermindinthecountry.LiveriesnearlyLadyBetty's.

ThouhastseenLadyBettyLawranceseveraltimes--hastthounot,Belford?

No,neverinmylife.

Butthouhast--andlainwithhertoo;orfamedoestheemorecreditthanthoudeservest--Why,Jack,knowestthounotLadyBetty'sothername?

Othername!--Hasshetwo?

Shehas.AndwhatthinkestthouofLadyBab.Wallis?

Othedevil!

Nowthouhastit.LadyBarbarathouknowest,liftedupincircumstances,andbypride,neverappearsorproducesherself,butonoccasionsspecial--topasstomenofqualityorprice,foraduchess,orcountess,atleast.Shehasalwaysbeenadmiredforagrandeurinherair,thatfewwomenofqualitycancomeupto;andneverwassupposedtobeotherthanwhatshepassedfor;thoughoftenandoftenaparamourforlords.

Andwho,thinkestthou,ismycousinMontague?

Nay,howshouldIknow?

Howindeed!Why,mylittleJohanettaGolding,alively,yetmodest-lookinggirl,ismycousinMontague.

There,Belford,isanaunt!--There'sacousin!--Bothhavewitatwill.Bothareaccustomedtoapequality.--Botharegenteellydescended.



Mistressesofthemselves,andwelleducated--yetpastpity.--TrueSpartandames;ashamedofnothingbutdetection--always,therefore,upontheirguardagainstthat.Andintheirownconceit,whenassumingtopparts,theveryqualitytheyape.

AndhowdostthinkIdressthemout?--I'lltellthee.

LadyBettyinarichgoldtissue,adornedwithjewelsofhighprice.

MycousinMontagueinapalepink,standingonendwithsilverflowersofherownworking.Charlotteaswellasmybelovedisadmirableatherneedle.Notquitesorichlyjewell'doutasLadyBetty;butear-ringsandsolitaireveryvaluable,andinfinitelybecoming.

Johanetta,thouknowest,hasagoodcomplexion,afineneck,andearsremarkablyfine--sohasCharlotte.SheisnearlyofCharlotte'sstaturetoo.

Lacesboth,therichestthatcouldbeprocured.

Thoucanstnotimaginewhatasumtheloanofthejewelscostme,thoughbutforthreedays.

Thissweetgirlwillhalfruinme.Butseestthounot,bythistime,

thatherreignisshort!--Itmustbeso.AndMrs.Sinclairhasalreadypreparedeverythingforherreceptiononcemore.

***

Herecometheladies--attendedbySusanMorrison,atenant-farmer'sdaughter,asLadyBetty'swoman;withherhandsbeforeher,andthoroughlyinstructed.

Howdressadvantageswomen!--especiallythosewhohavenaturallyagenteelairandturn,andhavehadeducation.

Hadstthouseenhowtheyparadedit--Cousin,andCousin,andNephew,ateveryword;LadyBettybridlingandlookinghaughtily-condescending.--Charlottegalantingherfan,andswimmingoverthefloorwithouttouchingit.

HowIlongtoseemyniece-elect!criesone--fortheyaretoldthatwearenotmarried;andarepleasedthatIhavenotputtheslightuponthemthattheyhadapprehendedfromme.

HowIlongtoseemydearcousinthatistobe,theother!

YourLa'ship,andyourLa'ship,andanawkwardcourtesyateveryaddress

--primSusanMorrison.

Topyourparts,yevillains!--YouknowhownicelyIdistinguish.Therewillbenopassioninthiscasetoblindthejudgment,andtohelponmeditateddelusion,aswhenyouengagewithtitledsinners.Mycharmerisascoolandasdistinguishing,thoughnotquitesolearnedinherownsex,asIam.Yourcommonly-assumeddignitywon'tdoformenow.Airsofsuperiority,asifborntorank.--Butnoover-do!--Doubtingnothing.Letnotyourfacesarraignyourhearts.



Easyandunaffected!--Yourverydresseswillgiveyouprideenough.

Alittlegraver,LadyBetty.--Moresignificance,lessbridlinginyourdignity.

That'stheair!Charminglyhit----Again----Youhaveit.

Deviltakeyou!--Lessarrogance.Youaregotintoairsofyoungquality.Belesssensibleofyournewcondition.Peopleborntodignitycommandrespectwithoutneedingtorequireit.

Nowforyourpart,CousinCharlotte!--

Prettywell.Butalittletoofrolickythatair.--YethaveIpreparedmybelovedtoexpectinyoubothgreatvivacityandquality-freedom.

Cursethoseeyes!--Thoseglancingswillneverdo.Adown-castbashfulturn,ifyoucancommandit.Lookuponme.Supposemenowtobemybeloved.

Deviltakethatleer.Toosignificantlyarch!--OnceIknewyouthegirlIwouldnowhaveyoutobe.

Sprightly,butnotconfident,cousinCharlotte!--Besureforgetnotto

lookdown,oraside,whenlookedat.Wheneyesmeeteyes,beyour'stheretreatingones.Yourfacewillbearexamination.

OLord!Lord!thatsoyoungacreaturecansosoonforgettheinnocentappearanceshefirstcharmedby;andwhichIthoughtbornwithyouall!--Fiveyearstoruinwhattwentyhadbeenbuildingup!Hownaturalthelatterlesson!Howdifficulttoregaintheformer!

Astranger,asIhopetobesaved,totheprincipalartsofyoursex!--Oncemore,whatadevilhasyourhearttodoinyoureyes?

HaveInottoldyou,thatmybelovedisagreatobserveroftheeyes?Sheoncequoteduponmeatext,*whichshowedmehowshecamebyher

knowledge--Dorcas'swerefoundguiltyoftreasonthefirstmomentshesawher.

*Eccles.xxvi.Thewhoredomofawomanmaybeknowninherhaughtylooksandeye-lids.Watchoveranimpudenteye,andmarvelnotifittrespassagainstthee.

Oncemore,supposemetobemycharmer.--Nowyouaretoencountermyexaminingeye,andmydoubtingheart--

That'smydear!

Studythatairinthepier-glass!--

Charmingly!--Perfectlyright!

Yourhonours,now,devils!--

Prettywell,CousinCharlotte,forayoungcountrylady!Tillformyieldstofamiliarity,youmaycourtesylow.Youmustnotbesupposedtohaveforgotyourboarding-schoolairs.



Buttoolow,toolowLadyBetty,foryouryearsandyourquality.Thecommonfaultofyoursexwillbeyourdanger:aimingtobeyoungtoolong!--Thedevil'sinyouall,whenyoujudgeofyourselvesbyyourwishes,andbyyourvanity!Fifty,inthatcase,isnevermorethanfifteen.

Gracefulease,consciousdignity,likethatofmycharmer,Oh!howhardtohit!

Bothtogethernow--

Charming!--That'stheair,LadyBetty!--That'sthecue,CousinCharlotte,suitedtothecharacterofeach!--But,oncemore,besuretohaveaguarduponyoureyes.

Neverfear,Nephew!--

Neverfear,Cousin.

AdramofBarbadoeseach--

Andnowwearegone--

LETTERXI

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.ATMRS.SINCLAIR'S,MONDAYAFTERNOON.

All'sright,asheartcanwish!--Inspiteofallobjection--inspiteofareluctancenexttofaintings--inspiteofallforesight,vigilance,suspicion--oncemoreisthecharmerofmysoulinheroldlodgings!

Nowthrobsawayeverypulse!Nowthump,thump,thumpsmyboundingheart

forsomething!

ButIhavenottimefortheparticularsofourmanagement.

Mybelovedisnowdirectingsomeofherclothestobepackedup--nevermoretoenterthishouse!Norevermorewillshe,Idaresay,whenonceagainoutofit!

Yetnotsomuchasaconditionofforgiveness!--TheHarlowe-spiritedfair-onewillnotdeservemymercy!--ShewillwaitforMissHowe'snextletter;andthen,ifshefindadifficultyinhernewschemes,[Thankherfornothing,]--will--willwhat?Whyeventhenwilltaketimetoconsider,whetherIamtobeforgiven,orforeverrejected.An

indifferencethatrevivesinmyhearttheremembranceofathousandofthelikenature.--AndyetLadyBettyandMissMontague,[amanwouldbetemptedtothink,Jack,thattheywishhertoprovokemyvengeance,]declare,thatIoughttobesatisfiedwithsuchaproudsuspension!

Theyareentirelyattachedtoher.Whatevershesays,is,mustbe,gospel!TheyareguaranteesforherreturntoHampsteadthisnight.Theyaretogobackwithher.AsupperbespokenbyLadyBettyatMrs.Moore's.Allthevacantapartmentsthere,bymypermission,(forIhadengagedthemforamonthcertain,)tobefilledwiththemandtheir



attendants,foraweekatleast,ortilltheycanprevailuponthedearperverse,astheyhopetheyshall,torestoremetoherfavour,andtoaccompanyLadyBettytoOxfordshire.

Thedearcreaturehasthusfarcondescended--thatshewillwritetoMissHoweandacquaintherwiththepresentsituationofthings.

Ifshewrite,Ishallseewhatshewrites.ButIbelieveshewillhaveotheremploymentsoon.

LadyBettyissure,shetellsher,thatsheshallprevailuponhertoforgiveme;thoughshedaressay,thatIdeservenotforgiveness.LadyBettyistoodelicatetoinquirestrictlyintothenatureofmyoffence.Butitmustbeanoffenceagainstherself,againstMissMontague,againstthevirtuousofthewholesex,oritcouldnotbesohighlyresented.Yetshewillnotleavehertillsheforgiveme,andtillsheseeournuptialsprivatelycelebrated.Meantime,assheapprovesofheruncle'sexpedient,shewilladdressherasalreadymywifebeforestrangers.

Stedman,hersolicitor,mayattendherforordersinrelationtoherchanceryaffair,atHampstead.Notonehourtheycanbefavouredwith,willtheylosefromthecompanyandconversationofsodear,socharminganewrelation.

Hardthenifshehadnotobligedthemwithhercompanyintheircoach-and-four,toandfromtheircousinLeeson's,wholonged,(astheythemselveshaddone,)toseealadysojustlycelebrated.

'HowwillLordM.berapturedwhenheseesher,andcansaluteherashisniece!

'HowwillLadySarahblessherself!--Shewillnowthinkherlossofthedeardaughtershemournsforhappilysupplied!'

MissMontaguedwellsuponeverywordthatfallsfromherlips.Sheperfectlyadoreshernewcousin--'Forhercousinshemustbe.Andhercousinwillshecallher!Sheanswersforequaladmirationinhersister

Patty.

'Ay,cryI,(whisperingloudenoughforhertohear,)howwillmycousinPatty'sdove'seyesglistenandrunover,ontheveryfirstinterview!--Sogracious,sonoble,sounaffectedadearcreature!'

'Whatahappyfamily,'chorusweall,'willour'sbe!'

Theseandsuchlikecongratulatoryadmirationseveryhourrepeated.Hermodestyhurtbytheecstaticpraises:--'Hergracesaretoonaturaltoherselfforhertobeproudofthem:butshemustbecontenttobepunishedforexcellenciesthatcastashadeuponthemostexcellent!'

Inshort,wearehere,asatHampstead,alljoyandrapture--allofusexceptmybeloved;inwhosesweetface,[heralmostfaintingreluctancetore-enterthesedoorsnotovercome,]reignsakindofanxiousserenity!--Buthowwilleventhatbechangedinafewhours!

MethinksIbegintopitythehalf-apprehensivebeauty!--Butavaunt,thouunseasonably-intrudingpity!Thouhastmorethanoncealreadywellnighundoneme!And,adieu,reflection!Begone,consideration!andcommiseration!Idismissyeall,foratleastaweektocome!--Butrememberedherbrokenword!Herflight,whenmyfondsoulwasmeditating



mercytoher!--BerememberedhertreatmentofmeinherletteronherescapetoHampstead!HerHampsteadvirulence!WhatisitsheoughtnottoexpectfromanunchainedBeelzebub,andaplottingvillain?

Beherpreferenceofthesinglelifetomealsoremembered!--Thatshedespisesme!--ThatsheevenrefusestobemyWIFE!--AproudLovelacetobedeniedawife!--TobemoreproudlyrejectedbyadaughteroftheHarlowes!--Theladiesofmyownfamily,[shethinksthemtheladiesofmyfamily,]supplicatinginvainforherreturningfavourtotheirdespisedkinsman,andtakinglawsfromherstillprouderpunctilio!

Betheexecrationsofhervixenfriendlikewiseremembered,pouredoutuponmefromherrepresentations,andtherebymadeherownexecrations!

BerememberedstillmoreparticularlytheTownsendplot,setonfootbetweenthem,andnow,inadayortwo,readytobreakout;andthesordidthreateningthrownoutagainstmebythatlittlefury!

IsnotthisthecrisisforwhichIhavebeenlongwaiting?ShallTomlinson,shallthesewomenbeengaged;shallsomanyenginesbesetatwork,atanimmenseexpense,withinfinitecontrivance;andalltonopurpose?

Isnotthisthehourofhertrial--andinher,ofthetrialofthevirtue

ofherwholesex,solongpremeditated,solongthreatened?--Whetherherfrostbefrostindeed?Whetherhervirtuebeprinciple?Whether,ifoncesubdued,shewillnotbealwayssubdued?Andwillshenotwantthecrownofherglory,theproofofhertillnowall-surpassingexcellence,ifIstopshortoftheultimatetrial?

Nowistheendofpurposeslongover-awed,oftensuspended,athand.AndneedIgothrowthesinsofhercursedfamilyintothetoo-weightyscale?

[Abhorredbeforce!--bethethoughtsofforce!--There'snotriumphoverthewillinforce!]ThisIknowIhavesaid.*ButwouldInothaveavoidedit,ifIcould?HaveInottriedeveryothermethod?AndhaveIanyotherresourceleftme?Cansheresentthelastoutragemorethan

shehasresentedafaintereffort?--Andifherresentmentsruneversohigh,cannotIrepairbymatrimony?--Shewillnotrefuseme,Iknow,Jack:thehaughtybeautywillnotrefuseme,whenherprideofbeingcorporallyinviolateisbroughtdown;whenshecantellnotales,butwhen,(beherresistancewhatitwill,)evenherownsexwillsuspectayieldinginresistance;andwhenthatmodesty,whichmayfillherbosomwithresentment,willlockupherspeech.

*Vol.IV.LetterXLVIII.

ButhowknowI,thatIhavenotmademyowndifficulties?Isshenota

woman!Whatredressliesforaperpetuatedevil?Mustshenotlive?Herpietywillsecureherlife.--Andwillnottimebemyfriend!What,inaword,willbeherbehaviourafterwards?--Shecannotflyme!--Shemustforgiveme--andasIhaveoftensaid,onceforgiven,willbeforeverforgiven.

Whythenshouldthisenervatingpityunsteelmyfoolishheart?

Itshallnot.AllthesethingswillIremember;andthinkofnothingelse,inordertokeepuparesolution,whichthewomenaboutmewill



haveitIshallbestillunabletohold.

I'llteachthedear,charmingcreaturetoemulatemeincontrivance;I'llteachhertoweavewebsandplotsagainstherconqueror!I'llshowher,thatinhersmugglingschemessheisbutaspidercomparedtome,andthatshehasallthistimebeenspinningonlyacobweb!

***

Whatshallwedonow!weareimmersedinthedepthofgriefandapprehension!Howilldowomenbeardisappointment!--SetupongoingtoHampstead,anduponquittingforeverahouseshere-enteredwithinfinitereluctance;whatthingssheintendedtotakewithherreadypackedup,herselfontiptoetobegone,andIpreparedtoattendherthither;shebeginstobeafraidthatsheshallnotgothisnight;andingriefanddespairhasflungherselfintoheroldapartment;lockedherselfin;andthroughthekey-holeDorcasseesheronherknees,praying,Isuppose,forasafedeliverance.

Andfromwhat?andwhereforetheseagonizingapprehensions?

Why,here,thisunkindLadyBetty,withthedearcreature'sknowledge,

thoughtoherconcern,andthismad-headedcousinMontaguewithoutit,whileshewasemployedindirectingherpackage,havehurriedawayinthecoachtotheirownlodgings,[only,indeed,toputupsomenight-clothes,andsoforth,inordertoattendtheirsweetcousintoHampstead;]and,nolesstomysurprisethanher's,arenotyetreturned.

Ihavesenttoknowthemeaningofit.

Inagreathurryofspirits,shewouldhavehadmetogomyself.Hardlyanypacifyingher!Thegirl,Godblessher!iswildwithherownidleapprehensions!Whatissheafraidof?

Icursethembothfortheirdelay.Mytardyvillain,howhestays!

Devilfetchthem!letthemsendtheircoach,andwe'llgowithoutthem.InherhearingIbidthefellowtellthemso.Perhapshestaystobringthecoach,ifanythinghappenstohindertheladiesfromattendingmybelovedthisnight.

***

Deviltakethem,againsayI!Theypromisedtootheywouldnotstay,becauseitwasbuttwonightsagothatachariotwasrobbedatthefootofHampstead-hill,whichalarmedmyfair-onewhentoldofit!

Oh!here'sLadyBetty'sservant,withabillet.

TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.MONDAYNIGHT.

Excuseus,mydearNephew,Ibeseechyou,tomydearestkinswoman.Onenightcannotbreaksquares:forhereMissMontaguehasbeentakenviolentlyillwiththreefaintingfits,oneafteranother.Thehurryofherjoy,Ibelieve,tofindyourdearladysomuchsurpassall



expectations,[neverdidfamilylove,youknow,reignsostrongasamongus,]andthetooeagerdesireshehadtoattendher,haveoccasionedit!Forshehasbutweakspirits,poorgirl!wellasshelooks.

Ifshebebetter,wewillcertainlygowithyoutomorrowmorning,afterwehavebreakfastedwithher,atyourlodgings.Butwhethershebe,ornot,IwilldomyselfthepleasuretoattendyourladytoHampstead;andwillbewithyouforthatpurposeaboutnineinthemorning.Withduecomplimentstoyourmostworthilybeloved,Iam

Your'saffectionately,ELIZAB.LAWRANCE.

***

Faithandtroth,Jack,Iknownotwhattodowithmyself;forhere,justnowhavingsentintheabovenotebyDorcas,outcamemybelovedwithitinherhand,inafitofphrensy!--true,bymysoul!

Shehadindeedcomplainedofherheadalltheevening.

Dorcasrantome,outofbreath,totellme,thatherladywascomingin

somestrangeway;butshefollowedhersoquick,thatthefrightedwenchhadnottimetosayinwhatway.

Itseems,whenshereadthebillet--Nowindeed,saidshe,amIalostcreature!OthepoorClarissaHarlowe!

Shetoreoffherhead-clothes;inquiredwhereIwas;andinshecame,hershiningtressesflowingaboutherneck;herrufflestorn,andhangingintattersabouthersnowyhands,withherarmsspreadout--hereyeswildlyturned,asifstartingfromtheirorbits--downsunksheatmyfeet,assoonassheapproachedme;hercharmingbosomheavingtoherupliftedface;andclaspingherarmsaboutmyknees,DearLovelace,saidshe,ifever--ifever--ifever--and,unabletospeakanotherword,quittingher

claspinghold--down--prostrateonthefloorsunkshe,neitherinafitnoroutofone.

Iwasquiteastonished.--Allmypurposessuspendedforafewmoments,Iknewneitherwhattosay,norwhattodo.But,recollectingmyself,amIagain,thoughtI,inawaytobeovercome,andmadeafoolof!--IfInowrecede,Iamgoneforever.

Iraisedher;butdownshesunk,asifquitedisjointed--herlimbsfailingher--yetnotinafitneither.Ineverheardoforsawsuchadearunaccountable;almostlifeless,andspeechlesstooforafewmoments;whatmustherapprehensionsbeatthatmoment?--Andforwhat?--Anhigh-notioneddearsoul!--Prettyignorance!--thoughtI.

Neverhavingmetwithsosincere,sounquestionablearepugnance,Iwasstaggered--Iwasconfounded--yethowshouldIknowthatitwouldbesotillItried?--Andhow,havingproceededthusfar,couldIstop,wereInottohavehadthewomentogoadmeon,andtomakelightofcircumstances,whichtheypretendedtobebetterjudgesofthanI?

Iliftedher,however,intoachair,andinwordsofdisorderedpassion,toldher,allherfearswereneedless--wonderedatthem--beggedofhertobepacified--besoughtherrelianceonmyfaithandhonour--andrevowed



allmyoldvows,andpouredforthnewones.

Atlast,withaheart-breakingsob,Isee,Isee,Mr.Lovelace,inbrokensentencesshespoke--Isee,Isee--thatatlast--Iamruined!--Ruined,ifyourpity--letmeimploreyourpity!--anddownonherbosom,likeahalf-broken-stalkedlilytop-heavywiththeoverchargingdewsofthemorning,sunkherhead,withasighthatwenttomyheart.

AllIcouldthinkoftore-assureher,whenalittlerecovered,Isaid.

WhydidInotsendfortheircoach,asIhadintimated?Itmightreturninthemorningfortheladies.

Ihadactuallydoneso,Itoldher,onseeingherstrangeuneasiness.ButitwasthengonetofetchadoctorforMissMontague,lesthischariotshouldnotbesoready.

Ah!Lovelace!saidshe,withadoubtingface;anguishinherimploringeye.

LadyBettywouldthinkitverystrange,Itoldher,ifsheweretoknowitwassodisagreeabletohertostayonenightforhercompanyinthehousewhereshehadpassedsomany.

Shecalledmenamesuponthis--shehadcalledmenamesbefore.--Iwaspatient.

LethergotoLadyBetty'slodgingsthen;directlygo;ifthepersonIcalledLadyBettywasreallyLadyBetty.

If,mydear!GoodHeaven!WhatavillaindoesthatIFshowyoubelievemetobe!

Icannothelpit--Ibeseechyouoncemore,letmegotoMrs.Leeson's,ifthatIFoughtnottobesaid.

Thenassumingamoreresolutespirit--Iwillgo!Iwillinquiremyway!

--Iwillgobymyself!--andwouldhaverushedbyme.

Ifoldedmyarmsabouthertodetainher;pleadingthebadwayIheardpoorCharlottewasin;andwhatafartherconcernherimpatience,ifshewent,wouldgivetopoorCharlotte.

ShewouldbelievenothingIsaid,unlessIwouldinstantlyorderacoach,(sinceshewasnottohaveLadyBetty's,norwaspermittedtogotoMrs.Leeson's,)andlethergoinittoHampstead,lateasitwas,andallalone,somuchthebetter;forinthehouseofpeopleofwhomLadyBetty,uponinquiry,hadheardabadcharacter,[Droptfoolishlythis,bymypratingnewrelation,inordertodocredittoherself,bydepreciatingothers,]everything,andeveryface,lookingwithsomuchmeaning

vileness,aswellasmyown,[thouartstilltoosensible,thoughtI,mycharmer!]shewasresolvednottostayanothernight.

Dreadingwhatmighthappenastoherintellects,andbeingveryapprehensivethatshemightpossiblygothroughagreatdealbeforemorning,(thoughmoreviolentshecouldnotwellbewiththeworstshedreaded,)Ihumouredher,andorderedWill.toendeavourtogetacoachdirectly,tocarryustoHampstead;Icarednotatwhatprice.

Robbers,withwhomIwouldhaveterrifiedher,shefearednot--Iwasall



herfear,Ifound;andthishouseherterror:forIsawplainlythatshenowbelievedthatLadyBettyandMissMontaguewerebothimpostors.

Buthermistrustisalittleofthelatesttodoherservice!

And,OJack,therageoflove,therageofrevengeisuponme!byturnstheytearme!Theprogressalreadymade--thewomen'sinstigations--thepowerIshallhavetotryhertotheutmost,andstilltomarryher,ifshebenottobebroughttocohabitation--letmeperish,Belford,ifsheescapemenow!

***

Will.isnotyetcomeback.Neareleven.

***

Will.isthismomentreturned.Nocoachtobegot,eitherforloveormoney.

Oncemoresheurges--toMrs.Leeson's,letmego,Lovelace!GoodLovelace,letmegotoMrs.Leeson's?WhatisMissMontague'sillnesstomyterror?---FortheAlmighty'ssake,Mr.Lovelace!--herhandsclasped.

Omyangel!Whatawildnessisthis!Doyouknow,doyousee,mydearestlife,whatappearancesyourcauselessapprehensionshavegivenyou?--Doyouknowitispasteleveno'clock?

Twelve,one,two,three,four--anyhour,Icarenot--Ifyoumeanmehonourably,letmegooutofthishatedhouse!

Thou'ltobserve,Belford,thatthoughthiswaswrittenafterwards,yet,

(asinotherplaces,)Iwriteitasitwasspokenandhappened,asifIhadretiredtoputdowneverysentencespoken.Iknowthoulikestthislivelypresent-tensemanner,asitisoneofmypeculiars.

Justasshehadrepeatedthelastwords,Ifyoumeanmehonourably,letmegooutofthishatedhouse,incameMrs.Sinclair,inagreatferment--Andwhat,pray,Madam,hasthishousedonetoyou?Mr.Lovelace,youhaveknownmesometime;and,ifIhavenotthenicenessofthislady,IhopeIdonotdeservetobetreatedthus!

Shesetherhugearmsakimbo:Hoh!Madam,letmetellyouthatIamamazedatyourfreedomswithmycharacter!And,Mr.Lovelace,[holdingup,andviolentlyshakingherhead,]ifyouareagentleman,andamanof

honour----

Havingneverbeforeseenanythingbutobsequiousnessinthiswoman,littleasshelikedher,shewasfrightedathermasculineair,andfiercelook--Godhelpme!criedshe--whatwillbecomeofmenow!Then,turningherheadhitherandthither,inawildkindofamaze.WhomhaveIforaprotector!Whatwillbecomeofmenow!

Iwillbeyourprotector,mydearestlove!--ButindeedyouareuncharitablysevereuponpoorMrs.Sinclair!Indeedyouare!--Sheisa



gentlewomanborn,andtherelictofamanofhonour;andthoughleftinsuchcircumstanceastoobligehertoletlodgings,yetwouldshescorntobeguiltyofawilfulbaseness.

Ihopeso--itmaybeso--Imaybemistaken--but--butthereisnocrime,Ipresume,notreason,tosayIdon'tlikeherhouse.

Theolddragonstraddleduptoher,withherarmskemboedagain--hereye-browserect,likethebristlesuponahog'sback,and,scoulingoverhershortenednose,morethanhalf-hidherferreteyes.Hermouthwasdistorted.Shepoutedoutherblubber-lips,asiftobellowsupwindandsputterintoherhorse-nostrils;andherchinwascurdled,andmorethanusuallyprominentwithpassion.

WithtwoHoh-Madamssheaccostedthefrightedfair-one;who,terrified,caughtholdofmysleeve.

Ifearedshewouldfallintofits;and,withalookofindignation,toldMrs.Sinclairthattheseapartmentsweremine;andIcouldnotimaginewhatshemeant,eitherbylisteningtowhatpassedbetweenmeandmyspouse,ortocomeinuninvited;andstillmoreIwonderedathergivingherselfthesestrangeliberties.

Imaybetoblame,Jack,forsufferingthiswretchtogiveherselfthese

airs;buthercominginwaswithoutmyorders.Theoldbeldam,throwingherselfintoachair,fellablubberingandexclaiming.Andthepacifyingofher,andendeavouringtoreconciletheladytoher,tookuptillnearoneo'clock.

Andthus,betweenterror,andthelatehour,andwhatfollowed,shewasdivertedfromthethoughtsofgettingoutofthehousetoMrs.Leeson's,oranywhereelse.

LETTERXII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.TUESDAYMORNING,JUNE13.

Andnow,Belford,Icangonofarther.Theaffairisover.Clarissalives.AndIam

Yourhumbleservant,R.LOVELACE.

[ThewholeofthisblacktransactionisgivenbytheinjuredladytoMissHowe,inhersubsequentletters,datedThursday,July6.SeeLettersLXVII.LXVIII.LXIX.]

LETTERXIII

MR.BELFORD,TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.WATFORD,WEDN.JAN.14.



Othousavage-heartedmonster!Whatworkhastthoumadeinoneguiltyhour,forawholeageofrepentance!

Iaminexpressiblyconcernedatthefateofthismatchlesslady!Shecouldnothavefallenintothehandsofanyothermanbreathing,andsufferedasshehasdonewiththee.

Ihadwrittenagreatpartofanotherlonglettertotrytosoftenthyflintyheartinherfavour;forIthoughtitbuttoolikelythatthoushouldstsucceedingettingherbackagaintotheaccursedwoman's.ButIfinditwouldhavebeentoolate,hadIfinishedit,andsentitaway.YetcannotIforbearwriting,tourgetheetomaketheonlyamendsthounowcanstmakeher,byaproperuseofthelicensethouhastobtained.

Poor,poorlady!ItisapaintomethatIeversawher.Suchanadorerofvirtuetobesacrificedtothevilestofhersex;andthoutheirimplementinthedevil'shand,forapurposesobase,soungenerous,soinhumane!--Pridethyself,Ocruellestofmen!inthisreflection;andthatthytriumphoverawoman,whoforthysakewasabandonedofeveryfriendshehadintheworld,waseffected;notbyadvantagestakenofherweaknessandcredulity;butbytheblackestartifice;afteralongcourseofstudieddeceitshadbeentriedtonopurpose.

Icantellthee,itiswelleitherfortheeorforme,thatIamnotthebrotherofthelady.HadIbeenherbrother,herviolationmusthavebeenfollowedbythebloodofoneofus.

Excuseme,Lovelace;andletnottheladyfaretheworseformyconcernforher.AndyetIhavebutoneothermotivetoaskthyexcuse;andthatis,becauseIowetothyowncommunicativepentheknowledgeIhaveofthybarbarousvillany,sincethoumightest,ifthouwouldst,havepassedituponmeforacommonseduction.

CLARISSALIVES,thousayest.Thatshedoesismywonder:andthesewordsshowthatthouthyself(thoughthoucouldst,nevertheless,proceed)

hardlyexpectedstshewouldhavesurvivedtheoutrage.Whatmusthavebeenthepoorlady'sdistress(watchfulasshehadbeenoverherhonour)whendreadfulcertaintytookplaceofcruelapprehension!--Andyetamanmayguesswhatmusthavebeen,bythatwhichthoupaintest,whenshesuspectedherselftricked,deserted,andbetrayed,bythepretendedladies.

Thatthoucouldstbeholdherphrensyonthisoccasion,andherhalf-speechless,half-faintingprostrationatthyfeet,andyetretainthyevilpurposes,willhardlybethoughtcredible,evenbythosewhoknowthee,iftheyhaveseenher.

Poor,poorlady!Withsuchnoblequalitiesaswouldhaveadornedthe

mostexaltedmarriedlife,tofallintothehandsoftheonlymanintheworld,whocouldhavetreatedherasthouhasttreatedher!--Andtoletloosetheolddragon,asthouproperlycallesther,uponthebefore-affrightedinnocent,whatabarbaritywasthat!Whatapoorpieceofbarbarity!inordertoobtainbyterror,whatthoudispairedsttogainbylove,thoughsupportedbystratagemsthemostinsidious!

OLOVELACE!LOVELACE!hadIdoubteditbefore,Ishouldnowbeconvinced,thattheremustbeaWORLDAFTERTHIS,todojusticetoinjuredmerit,andtopunishbarbarousperfidy!Couldthedivine



SOCRATES,andthedivineCLARISSA,otherwisehavesuffered?

Butletme,ifpossible,foronemoment,trytoforgetthisvillanousoutrageonthemostexcellentofwomen.

Ihavebusinessherewhichwillholdmeyetafewdays;andthenperhapsIshallquitthishouseforever.

Ihavehadasolemnandtedioustimeofit.IshouldneverhaveknownthatIhadhalftherespectIreallyfindIhadfortheoldgentleman,hadInotsoclosely,athisearnestdesire,attendedhim,andbeenawitnessofthetorturesheunderwent.

Thismelancholyoccasionmaypossiblyhavecontributedtohumanizeme:butsurelyInevercouldhavebeensoremorselessacaitiffasthouhastbeen,toawomanofhalfthislady'sexcellence.

Butpr'ythee,dearLovelace,ifthou'rtaman,andnotadevil,resolve,outofhand,torepairthysinofingratitude,byconferringuponthyselfthehighesthonourthoucanstreceive,inmakingherlawfullythine.

Butifthoucanstnotprevailuponthyselftodoherthisjustice,IthinkIshouldnotscrupleatiltwiththee,[aneverlastingruptureatleastmustfollow]ifthousacrificesthertotheaccursedwomen.

ThouartdesiroustoknowwhatadvantageIreapbymyuncle'sdemise.Idonotcertainlyknow;forIhavenotbeensogreedilysolicitousonthissubjectassomeofthekindredhavebeen,whooughttohaveshownmoredecency,asIhavetoldthem,andsufferedthecorpsetohavebeencoldbeforetheyhadbeguntheirhungryinquiries.But,bywhatIgatheredfromthepoorman'stalktome,whooftenerthanIwishedtoucheduponthesubject,Ideemitwillbeupwardsof5000Â£.incash,andinthefunds,afteralllegaciespaid,besidestherealestate,whichisaclear1000Â£.a-year.

Iwish,frommyheart,thouwertamoney-lover!Weretheestatetobeofdoublethevalue,thoushouldsthaveiteveryshilling;onlyuponone

condition[formycircumstancesbeforewereaseasyasIwishthemtobewhileIamsingle]--thatthouwouldstpermitmethehonourofbeingthisfatherlesslady'sfather,asitiscalled,atthealtar.

Thinkofthis!mydearLovelace!behonest:andletmepresenttheewiththebrightestjewelthatmaneverpossessed;andthen,bodyandsoul,wiltthoubindtotheeforeverthy

BELFORD.

LETTERXIV

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.THURSDAY,JUNE15.

Letmealone,yougreatdog,you!--letmealone!--haveIheardalesserboy,hiscowardarmsheldoverhisheadandface,saytoabigger,whowaspommelinghim,forhavingrunawaywithhisapple,hisorange,orhisginger-bread.



SosayItothee,onoccasionofthyseveritytothypoorfriend,who,asthouownest,hasfurnishedthee(ungenerousasthouart!)withtheweaponsthoubrandishestsofearfullyagainsthim.--Andtowhatpurpose,whenthemischiefisdone?when,ofconsequence,theaffairisirretrievable?andwhenaCLARISSAcouldnotmoveme?

Well,but,afterall,Imustown,thatthereissomethingverysingularinthislady'scase:and,attimes,IcannothelpregrettingthateverIattemptedher;sincenotonepowereitherofbodyorsoulcouldbemovedinmyfavour;andsince,tousetheexpressionofthephilosopher,onamuchgraveroccasion,thereisnodifferencetobefoundbetweentheskullofKingPhilipandthatofanotherman.

Butpeople'sextravagantnotionsofthingsalternotfacts,Belford:and,whenall'sdone,MissClarissaHarlowehasbutrunthefateofathousandothersofhersex--onlythattheydidnotsetsucharomanticvalueuponwhattheycalltheirhonour;that'sall.

AndyetIwillallowtheethis--thatifapersonsetsahighvalueuponanything,beiteversuchatrifleinitself,orintheeyeofothers,therobbingofthatpersonofitisnotatrifletohim.Takethematterinthislight,IownIhavedonewrong,greatwrong,tothisadmirablecreature.

ButhaveInotknowntwentyandtwentyofthesex,whohaveseemedtocarrytheirnotionsofvirtuehigh;yet,whenbroughttothetest,haveabatedoftheirseverity?Andhowshouldwebeconvincedthatanyofthemareprooftilltheyaretried?

AthousandtimeshaveIsaid,thatIneveryetmetwithsuchawomanasthis.IfIhad,IhardlyevershouldhaveattemptedMissClarissaHarlowe.Hithertosheisallangel:andwasnotthatthepointwhichatsettingoutIproposedtotry?*Andwasnotcohabitationevermydarlingview?AndamInotnow,atlast,inthehighroadtoit?--Itistrue,thatIhavenothingtoboastofastoherwill.Theverycontrary.Butnowarewecometothetest,whethershecannotbebroughttomakethebestofanirreparableevil.Ifsheexclaim,[shehasreasontoexclaim,

andIwillsitdownwithpatiencebythehourtogethertohearherexclamations,tillsheistiredofthem,]shewillthendescendtoexpostulationperhaps:expostulationwillgivemehope:expostulationwillshowthatshehatesmenot.And,ifshehatemenot,shewillforgive:and,ifshenowforgive,thenwillallbeover;andshewillbemineuponmyownterms:anditshallthenbethewholestudyofmyfuturelifetomakeherhappy.

*SeeVol.III.LetterXVIII.

So,Belford,thouseestthatIhavejourneyedontothisstage[indeed,

throughinfinitemazes,andasinfiniteremorses]withonedeterminedpointinviewfromthefirst.Tothyurgentsupplicationthen,thatIwilldohergratefuljusticebymarriage,letmeanswerinMatt.Prior'stwolinesonhishoped-forauditorship;asputintothemouthsofhisSt.JohnandHarley;

---Letthatbedone,whichMatt.dothsay.YEA,quoththeEarl--BUTNOTTO-DAY.

Thouseest,Jack,thatImakenoresolutions,however,againstdoingher,



onetimeorother,thewished-forjustice,evenwereItosucceedinmyprincipalview,cohabitation.AndofthisIdoassurethee,that,ifIevermarry,itmust,itshallbeMissClarissaHarlowe.--Norisherhonouratallimpairedwithme,bywhatshehassofarsuffered:butthecontrary.Shemustonlytakecarethat,ifshebeatlastbroughttoforgiveme,sheshowmethatherLovelaceistheonlymanonearthwhomshecouldhaveforgivenonthelikeoccasion.

Butah,Jack!what,inthemeantime,shallIdowiththisadmirablecreature?Atpresent--[Iamlothtosayit--but,atpresent]sheisquitestupified.

Ihadrather,methinks,sheshouldhaveretainedallheractivepowers,thoughIhadsufferedbyhernailsandherteeth,thanthatsheshouldbesunkintosuchastateofabsolute--insensibility(shallIcallit?)asshehasbeenineverysinceTuesdaymorning.Yet,asshebeginsalittletorevive,andnow-and-thentocallnames,andtoexclaim,Idreadalmosttoengagewiththeanguishofaspiritthatowesitsextraordinaryagitationstoanicenessthathasnoexampleeitherinancientormodernstory.For,afterall,whatisthereinhercasethatshouldstupifysuchaglowing,suchabloomingcharmer?--Excessofgrief,excessofterror,havemadeaperson'shairstandonend,andeven(aswehaveread)changedthecolourofit.Butthatitshouldsostupify,astomakeaperson,attimes,insensibletothoseimaginarywrongs,which

wouldraiseothersfromstupifaction,isverysurprising!ButIwillleavethissubject,leastitshouldmakemetoograve.

IwasyesterdayatHampstead,anddischargedallobligationsthere,withnosmallapplause.Itoldthemthattheladywasnowashappyasmyself:andthatisnogreatuntruth;forIamnotaltogetherso,whenIallowmyselftothink.

Mrs.Townsend,withhertars,hadnotbeenthenthere.ItoldthemwhatIwouldhavethemsaytoher,ifshecame.

Well,but,afterall[howmanyafter-all'shaveI?]Icouldbevery

grave,wereItogivewaytoit.--Thedeviltakemeforafool!What'sthemattewithme,Iwonder!--Imustbreatheafresherairforafewdays.

ButwhatshallIdowiththisadmirablecreaturethewhile?--Hangme,ifIknow!--For,ifIstir,thevenomousspiderofthishabitationwillwanttosetuponthecharmingfly,whosesilkenwingsarealreadysoentangledinmyenormousweb,thatshecannotmovehandorfoot:forsomuchhasgriefstupifiedher,thatsheisatpresentdestituteofwill,asshealwaysseemedtobeofdesire.Imustnotthereforethinkofleavingheryetfortwodaystogether.

LETTERXV


Ihavejustnowhadaspecimenofwhattheresentmentofthisdearcreaturewillbewhenquiterecovered:anaffectingone!--ForenteringherapartmentafterDorcas;andendeavouringtosootheandpacifyherdisorderedmind;inthemidstofmyblandishments,shehelduptoHeaven,



inaspeechlessagony,theinnocentlicense(whichshehasinherownpower);asthepoordistressedCatalanshelduptheirEnglishtreaty,onanoccasionthatkeepstheworstofmyactionsincountenance.

Sheseemedabouttocalldownvengeanceuponme;when,happilytheleadengod,inpitytohertremblingLovelace,wavedoverherhalf-drownedeyeshissomniferouswant,andlaidasleepthefairexclaimer,beforeshecouldgohalfthroughwithherintendedimprecation.

Thouwiltguess,bywhatIhavewritten,thatsomelittlearthasbeenmadeuseof:butitwaswithagenerousdesign(ifthou'ltallowmethewordonsuchanoccasion)inordertolessenthetoo-quicksenseshewaslikelytohaveofwhatshewastosuffer.AcontrivanceIneverhadoccasionforbefore,andhadnotthoughtofnow,ifMrs.Sinclairhadnotproposedittome:towhomIleftthemanagementofit:andIhavedonenothingbutcursehereversince,lestthequantityshouldhaveforeverdampenedhercharmingintellects.

Hencemyconcern--forIthinkthepoorladyoughtnottohavebeensotreated.Poorlady,didIsay?--WhathaveItodowiththycreepingstyle?--ButhavenotItheworstofit;sinceherinsensibilityhasmademebutathieftomyownjoys?

Ididnotintendtotelltheeofthislittleinnocenttrick;forsuchI

designedittobe;butthatIhatedisingenuousness:tothee,especially:andasIcannothelpwritinginamoreseriousveinthanusual,thouwouldstperhaps,hadInothintedthetruecause,haveimaginedthatIwassorryforthefactitself:andthiswouldhavegiventheeagooddealoftroubleinscribblingdullpersuasivestorepairbymatrimony;andmeinreadingthycruelnonsense.Besides,onedayorother,thoumightest,hadInotconfessedit,haveheardofitinanaggravatedmanner;andIknowthouhastsuchanhighopinionofthislady'svirtue,thatthouwouldstbedisappointed,ifthouhadstreasontothinkthatshewassubduedbyherownconsent,oranytheleastyieldinginherwill.Andsoisshebeholdentomeinsomemeasure,that,attheexpenseofmyhonour,shemaysojustlyformaplea,whichwillentirelysalveher's.

Andnowisthewholesecretout.

ThouwiltsayIamahorridfellow!--Astheladydoes,thatIamtheunchainedBeelzebub,andaplottingvillain:andasthisiswhatyoubothsaidbeforehand,andnothingworsecanbesaid,Idesire,ifthouwouldstnothavemequiteseriouswiththee,andthatIshouldthinkthoumeanestmorebythytiltinghintthanIamwillingtobelievethoudost,thatthouwiltforbearthyinvectives:Forisnotthethingdone?--Canitbehelped?--AndmustInotnowtrytomakethebestofit?--AndtheratherdoIenjointomaketheethis,andinviolablesecrecy;becauseIbegintothinkthatmypunishmentwillbegreaterthanthefault,wereittobeonlyfrommyownreflection.

LETTERXVI

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.FRIDAY,JUNE16.

Iamsorrytohearofthymisfortune;buthopethouwiltnotlongliebyit.Thyservanttellsmewhatnarrowescapethouhadstwiththyneck,I



wishitmaynotbeominous:butIthinkthouseemestnottobeinsoenterprisingawayasformerly;andyet,merryorsad,thouseestarake'sneckisalwaysindanger,ifnotfromthehangman,fromhisownhorse.But,'tisavicioustoad,itseems;andIthinkthoushouldstneverventureuponhisbackagain;for'tisaplaguythingforriderandhorsebothtobevicious.

Thefellowtellsme,thoudesirestmetocontinuetowritetotheeinordertodivertthychagrinonthyforcedconfinement:buthowcanIthinkitinmypowertodivert,whenmysubjectisnotpleasingtomyself?

Caesarneverknewwhatitwastobehipped,Iwillcallit,tillhecametobewhatPompeywas;thatistosay,tillhearrivedattheheightofhisambition:nordidthyLovelaceknowwhatitwastobegloomy,tillhehadcompletedhiswishesuponthemostcharmingcreatureintheworld.

AndyetwhysayIcompleted?whenthewill,theconsent,iswanting--andIhavestillviewsbeforemeofobtainingthat?

YetIcouldalmostjoinwiththeeinthewish,whichthousendestmeupbythyservant,unfriendlyasitis,thatIhadhadthymisfortunebeforeMondaynightlast:forhere,thepoorladyhasrunintoa

contraryextremetothatItoldtheeofinmylast:fornowissheasmuchtoolively,asbeforeshewastoostupid;and'batingthatshehasprettyfrequentlucidintervals,wouldbedeemedravingmad,andIshouldbeobligedtoconfineher.

Iammostconfoundedlydisturbedaboutit:forIbegintofearthatherintellectsareirreparablyhurt.

Whothedevilcouldhaveexpectedsuchstrangeeffectsfromacausesocommonandsoslight?

Butthesehigh-souledandhigh-sensedgirls,whohadsetupforshininglightsandexamplestotherestofthesex,arewithsuchdifficulty

broughtdowntothecommonstandard,thatawiseman,whoprefershispeaceofmindtohisglory,insubduingoneofthatexaltedclass,wouldhavenothingtosaytothem.

Idoallinmypowertoquietherspirits,whenIforcemyselfintoherpresence.

Igoon,beggingpardononeminute;andvowingtruthandhonouranother.

Iwouldatfirsthavepersuadedher,andofferedtocallwitnessestothetruthofit,thatwewereactuallymarried.Thoughthelicensewasinherhands,Ithoughttheassertionmightgodowninherdisorder;andcharmingconsequencesIhopedwouldfollow.Butthiswouldnot

do.--

Ithereforegaveupthathope:andnowIdeclaretoher,thatitismyresolutiontomarryher,themomentheruncleHarloweinformsmethathewillgracetheceremonywithhispresence.

ButshebelievesnothingIsay;nor,(whetherinhersenses,ornot)bearsmewithpatienceinhersight.

Ipityherwithallmysoul;andIcursemyself,whensheisinher



wailingfits,andwhenIapprehendthatintellects,socharming,areforeverdamped.

ButmoreIcursethesewomen,whoputmeuponsuchanexpedient!Lord!Lord!whatahandhaveImadeofit!--Andallforwhat?

Lastnight,forthefirsttimesinceMondaynight,shegottoherpenandink;butshepursuesherwritingwithsucheagernessandhurry,asshowtooevidentlyherdiscomposure.

Ihope,however,thatthisemploymentwillhelptocalmherspirits.

***

JustnowDorcastellsme,thatwhatshewritesshetears,andthrowsthepaperinfragmentsunderthetable,eitherasnotknowingwhatshedoes,ordislikingit:thengetsup,wringsherhands,weeps,andshiftsherseatallroundtheroom:thenreturnstohertable,sitsdown,andwritesagain.

***

Oneoddletter,asImaycallit,Dorcashasthismomentgivenmefromher--Carrythis,saidshe,tothevilestofmen.Dorcas,atoad,broughtit,withoutanyfurtherdirectiontome.Isatdown,intending(though'tisprettylong)togivetheeacopyofit:but,formylife,Icannot;'tissoextravagant.Andtheoriginalistoomuchanoriginaltoletitgooutofmyhands.

Butsomeofthescrapsandfragments,aseithertornthrough,orflungaside,Iwillcopy,forthenoveltyofthething,andtoshowtheehowhermindworksnowsheisinthewhimsicalway.YetIknowIamstillfurnishingtheewithnewweaponsagainstmyself.Butsparethycomments.

Myownreflectionsrenderthemneedless.Dorcasthinksherladywillaskforthem:sowishestohavethemtolayagainunderthetable.

Bythefirstthou'ltguessthatIhavetoldherthatMissHoweisveryill,andcan'twrite;thatshemayaccountthebetterfornothavingreceivedtheletterdesignedforher.

PAPERI(Tornintwopieces.)

MYDEARESTMISSHOWE,

Owhatdreadful,dreadfulthingshaveItotellyou!ButyetIcannottellyouneither.Butsay,areyoureallyill,asavile,vilecreatureinformsmeyouare?

Butheneveryettoldmetruth,andIhopehasnotinthis:andyet,ifitwerenottrue,surelyIshouldhaveheardfromyoubeforenow!--ButwhathaveItodotoupbraid?--Youmaywellbetiredofme!--Andifyouare,Icanforgiveyou;forIamtiredofmyself:andallmyownrelationsweretiredofmelongbeforeyouwere.



Howgoodyouhavealwaysbeentome,mineowndearAnnaHowe!--ButhowIramble!

Isatdowntosayagreatdeal--myheartwasfull--Ididnotknowwhattosayfirst--andthought,andgrief,andconfusion,and(Omypoorhead)Icannottellwhat--andthought,andgriefandconfusion,camecrowdingsothickuponme;onewouldbefirst;anotherwouldbefirst;allwouldbefirst;soIcanwritenothingatall.--Onlythat,whatevertheyhavedonetome,Icannottell;butIamnolongerwhatIwas-inanyonethingdidIsay?Yes,butIam;forIamstill,andIeverwillbe,

Yourtrue----

Plagueonit!Icanwritenomoreofthiseloquentnonsensemyself;whichrathershowsaraised,thanaquenched,imagination:butDorcasshalltranscribetheothersinseparatepapers,aswrittenbythewhimsicalcharmer:andsometimehencewhenallisover,andIcanbetterbeartoreadthem,Imayasktheeforasightofthem.Preservethem,therefore;forweoftenlookbackwithpleasureevenupontheheaviestgriefs,whenthecauseofthemisremoved.

PAPERII(Scratch'dthrough,andthrownunderthetable.)

--Andcanyou,mydear,honouredPapa,resolveforevertoreprobateyourpoorchild?--ButIamsureyouwouldnot,ifyouknewwhatshehassufferedsinceherunhappy--Andwillnobodypleadforyourpoorsufferinggirl?--Noonegoodbody?--Whythen,dearestSir,letitbeanactofyourowninnategoodness,whichIhavesomuchexperienced,andsomuchabused.Idon'tpresumetothinkyoushouldreceiveme--No,indeed!--Mynameis--Idon'tknowwhatmynameis!--Ineverdaretowishtocomeintoyourfamilyagain!--Butyourheavycurse,myPapa--Yes,Iwillcallyou

Papa,andhelpyourselfasyoucan--foryouaremyowndearPapa,whetheryouwillornot--andthoughIamanunworthychild--yetIamyourchild--

PAPERIII

ALadytookagreatfancytoayounglion,orabear,Iforgetwhich--butabear,oratiger,Ibelieveitwas.Itwasmadeherapresentofwhenawhelp.Shefeditwithherownhand:shenursedupthewickedcubwithgreattenderness;andwouldplaywithitwithoutfearorapprehensionofdanger:anditwasobedienttoallhercommands:anditstameness,assheusedtoboast,increasedwithitsgrowth;so

that,likealap-dog,itwouldfollowheralloverthehouse.Butmindwhatfollowed:atlast,somehow,neglectingtosatisfyitshungrymaw,orhavingotherwisedisobligeditonsomeoccasion,itresumeditsnature;andonasuddenfelluponher,andtoreherinpieces.--Andwhowasmosttoblame,Ipray?Thebrute,orthelady?Thelady,surely!--Forwhatshedidwasoutofnature,outofcharacter,atleast:whatitdidwasinitsownnature.

PAPERIV



Howartthounowhumbledinthedust,thouproudClarissaHarlowe!Thouthatneversteppedstoutofthyfather'shousebuttobeadmired!Whowertwonttoturnthineeye,sparklingwithhealthfullife,andself-assurance,todifferentobjectsatonceasthoupassedst,asif(forsothypenetratingsisterusedtosay)toplumethyselfupontheexpectedapplausesofallthatbeheldthee!Thouthatusedsttogotorestsatisfiedwiththeadulationspaidtheeinthepastday,andcouldstputoffeverythingbutthyvanity!---

PAPERV

Rejoicenotnow,myBella,mySister,myFriend;butpitythehumbledcreature,whosefoolishheartyouusedtosayyoubeheldthroughthethinveilofhumilitywhichcoveredit.

Itmusthavebeenso!Myfallhadnotelsebeenpermitted--

Youpenetratedmyproudheartwiththejealousyofaneldersister'ssearchingeye.

YouknewmebetterthanIknewmyself.Henceyourupbraidingsandyourchidings,whenIbegantototter.

Butforgivenowthosevaintriumphsofmyheart.

Ithought,poor,proudwretchthatIwas,thatwhatyousaidwasowingtoyourenvy.

IthoughtIcouldacquitmyintentionofanysuchvanity.

IwastoosecureintheknowledgeIthoughtIhadofmyownheart.

Mysupposedadvantagesbecameasnaretome.

Andwhatnowistheendofall?--

PAPERVI

Whatnowisbecomeoftheprospectsofahappylife,whichonceIthoughtopeningbeforeme?--Whonowshallassistinthesolemnpreparations?Whonowshallprovidethenuptialornaments,whichsoftenanddiverttheapprehensionsofthefearfulvirgin?Nocourtnowtobepaidtomysmiles!Noencouragingcomplimentstoinspiretheewithhopeoflayinga

mindnotunworthyoftheeunderobligation!Noelevationnowforconsciousmerit,andapplaudedpurity,tolookdownfromonaprostrateadorer,andanadmiringworld,anduptopleasedandrejoicingparentsandrelations!

PAPERVII

Thouperniciouscaterpillar,thatpreyestuponthefairleafofvirgin



fame,andpoisonestthoseleaveswhichthoucanstnotdevour!

Thoufellblight,thoueasternblast,thouoverspreadingmildew,thatdestroyesttheearlypromisesoftheshiningyear!thatmockestthelaborioustoil,andblastestthejoyfulhopes,ofthepainfulhusbandman!

Thoufrettingmoth,thatcorruptestthefairestgarment!

Thoueatingcanker-worm,thatpreyestupontheopeningbud,andturnestthedamask-roseintolividyellowness!

If,asreligionteachesus,Godwilljudgeus,inagreatmeasure,byourbenevolentorevilactionstooneanother--Owretch!bethinkthee,intimebethinkthee,howgreatmustbethycondemnation!

PAPERVIIII

Atfirst,Isawsomethinginyourairandpersonthatdispleasedmenot.Yourbirthandfortuneswerenosmalladvantagestoyou.--Youactednotignoblybymypassionatebrother.Everybodysaidyouwerebrave:everybodysaidyouweregenerous:abraveman,Ithought,couldnotbeabaseman:agenerousman,couldnot,Ibelieved,beungenerous,

whereheacknowledgedobligation.Thusprepossessed,alltherestthatmysoullovedandwishedforinyourreformationIhoped!--Iknewnot,butbyreport,anyflagrantinstancesofyourvileness.Youseemedfrank,aswellasgenerous:franknessandgenerosityeverattractedme:whoeverkeptupthoseappearances,Ijudgedoftheirheartsbymyown;andwhateverqualitiesIwishedtofindinthem,Iwasreadytofind;and,whenfound,Ibelievedthemtobenativesofthesoil.

Myfortunes,myrank,mycharacter,Ithoughtafurthersecurity.IwasinnoneofthoserespectsunworthyofbeingthenieceofLordM.andofhistwonoblesisters.--Yourvows,yourimprecations--But,Oh!youhavebarbarouslyandbaselyconspiredagainstthathonour,whichyououghttohaveprotected:andnowyouhavemademe--Whatisitof

vilethatyouhavenotmademe?--

Yet,Godknowsmyheart,Ihadnoculpableinclinations!--Ihonouredvirtue!--Ihatedvice!--ButIknewnot,thatyouwereviceitself!

PAPERIX

Hadthehappinessofanyofthepoorestoutcastintheworld,whomIhadneveerseen,neverknown,neverbeforeheardof,lainasmuchinmypower,asmyhappinessdidinyour's,mybenevolentheartwouldhavemademeflytothesuccourofsuchapoordistressed--withwhatpleasure

wouldIhaveraisedthedejectedhead,andcomfortedthedespondingheart!--Butwhonowshallpitythepoorwretch,whohasincreased,insteadofdiminished,thenumberofthemiserable!

PAPERX

Leadme,wheremyownthoughtsthemselvesmayloseme;WhereImaydoseoutwhatI'veleftoflife,



Forgetmyself,andthatday'sguile!----Cruelremembrance!----howshallIappeasethee?

[Deathonlycanbedreadfultothebad;*Toinnocence'tislikeabugbeardress'dTofrightenchildren.Pullbutoffthemask,Andhe'llappearafriend.]

*Transcriber'snote:Portionssetoffinsquarebrackets[]arewrittenatanglestothemajorityofthetext,asifsqueezedintomargins.

----Oh!youhavedoneanactThatblotsthefaceandblushofmodesty;TakesofftheroseFromthefairforeheadofaninnocentlove,Andmakesablisterthere!

ThendownIlaidmyhead,Downoncoldearth,andforawhilewasdead;Andmyfreedsoultoastrangesomewherefled!Ah!sottishsoul!saidI,WhenbacktoitscageagainIsawitfly;

Fool!toresumeherbrokenchain,Androwthegalleyhereagain!Fool!tothatbodytoreturn,Whereitcondemn'danddestin'distomourn!

[Icouldataleunfold----Wouldharrowupthysoul----]

OmyMissHowe!ifthouhastfriendship,helpme,Andspeakthewordsofpeacetomydividedsoul,Thatwarswithinme,Andraisesev'rysensetomyconfusion.I'mtott'ringonthebrink

Ofpeace;anthouartalltheholdI'veleft!Assistme----inthepangsofmyaffliction!

Whenhonour'slost,'tisarelieftodie:Death'sbutasureretreatfrominfamy.

[ByswiftmisfortunesHowIampursu'd!WhichoneachotherAre,likewaves,renew'd!]

Thefarewell,youth,Andallthejoysthatdwell

Withyouthandlife!Andlifeitself,farewell!

Forlifecanneverbesincerelyblest.Heav'npunishesthebad,andprovesthebest.

***



Afterall,Belford,IhavejustskimmedoverthesetranscriptionsofDorcas:andIseetherearemethodandgoodsenseinsomeofthem,wildasothersofthemare;andthathermemory,whichserveshersowellforthesepoeticalflights,isfarfrombeingimpaired.Andthisgivesmehope,thatshewillsoonrecoverhercharmingintellects--thoughIshallbethesuffererbytheirrestoration,Imakenodoubt.

But,inthelettershewrotetome,thereareyetgreaterextravagancies;andthoughIsaiditwastooaffectingtogivetheeacopyofit,yet,afterIhavelettheeseetheloosepapersenclosed,IthinkImaythrowinatranscriptofthat.Dorcasthereforeshallheretranscribeit.Icannot.Thereadingofitaffectedmetentimesmorethantheseverestreproachesofaregularmindcoulddo.

TOMR.LOVELACE

Ineverintendedtowriteanotherlinetoyou.Iwouldnotseeyou,ifIcouldhelpit--OthatIneverhad!

Buttellme,ofatruth,isMissHowereallyandtrulyill?--Veryill?-Andisnotherillnesspoison?Anddon'tyouknowwhogaveittoher?

Whatyou,orMrs.Sinclair,orsomebody(Icannottellwho)havedoneto

mypoorhead,youbestknow:butIshallneverbewhatIwas.Myheadisgone.Ihaveweptawayallmybrain,Ibelieve;forIcanweepnomore.IndeedIhavehadmyfullshare;soitisnomatter.

But,goodnow,Lovelace,don'tsetMrs.Sinclairuponmeagain.--Ineverdidheranyharm.Shesoaffrightsme,whenIseeher!--Eversince--whenwasit?Icannottell.Youcan,Isuppose.Shemaybeagoodwoman,asfarasIknow.Shewasthewifeofamanofhonour--verylikely--thoughforcedtoletlodgingsforalivelihood.Poorgentlewoman!LetherknowIpityher:butdon'tlethercomenearmeagain--praydon't!

Yetshemaybeaverygoodwoman--

WhatwouldIsay!--IforgetwhatIwasgoingtosay.

OLovelace,youareSatanhimself;orhehelpsyououtineverything;andthat'sasbad!

Buthaveyoureallyandtrulysoldyourselftohim?Andforhowlong?Whatdurationisyourreigntohave?

Poorman!Thecontractwillbeout:andthenwhatwillbeyourfate!

OLovelace!ifyoucouldbesorryforyourself,Iwouldbesorrytoo--butwhenallmydoorsarefast,andnothingbutthekey-holeopen,andthekeyoflateputintothat,tobewhereyouare,inamannerwithout

openinganyofthem--Owretched,wretchedClarissaHarlowe!

ForIneverwillbeLovelace--letmyuncletakeitashepleases.

Well,butnowIrememberwhatIwasgoingtosay--itisforyourgood--notmine--fornothingcandomegoodnow!--Othouvillanousman!thouhatedLovelace!

ButMrs.Sinclairmaybeagoodwoman--ifyouloveme--butthatyoudon't--butdon'tletherblusterupwithherworsethanmannishairstome



again!Osheisafrightfulwoman!Ifshebeawoman!Sheneedednottoputonthatfearfulmasktoscaremeoutofmypoorwits.Butdon'ttellherwhatIsay--Ihavenohatredtoher--itisonlyfright,andfoolishfear,that'sall.--Shemaynotbeabadwoman--butneitherareallmen,anymorethanallwomenalike--Godforbidtheyshouldbelikeyou!

Alas!youhavekilledmyheadamongyou--Idon'tsaywhodidit!--Godforgiveyouall!--Buthaditnotbeenbettertohaveputmeoutofallyourwaysatonce?Youmightsafelyhavedoneit!Fornobodywouldrequiremeatyourhands--no,notasoul--except,indeed,MissHowewouldhavesaid,whensheshouldseeyou,What,Lovelace,haveyoudonewithClarissaHarlowe?--Andthenyoucouldhavegivenanyslight,gayanswer--sentherbeyondsea;or,shehasrunawayfromme,asshedidfromherparents.Andthiswouldhavebeeneasilycredited;foryouknow,Lovelace,shethatcouldrunawayfromthem,mightverywellrunawayfromyou.

ButthisisnothingtowhatIwantedtosay.NowIhaveit.

Ihavelostitagain--Thisfoolishwenchcomesteasingme--forwhatpurposeshouldIeat?ForwhatendshouldIwishtolive?--Itellthee,Dorcas,Iwillneithereatnordrink.IcannotbeworsethanIam.

Iwilldoasyou'dhaveme--goodDorcas,looknotuponmesofiercely--butthoucanstnotlooksobadasIhaveseensomebodylook.

Mr.Lovelace,nowthatIrememberwhatItookpeninhandtosay,letmehurryoffmythoughts,lestIlosethemagain--hereIamsensible--andyetIamhardlysensibleneither--butIknowmyheadisnotasitshouldbe,forallthat--thereforeletmeproposeonethingtoyou:itisforyourgood--notmine;andthisisit:

Imustneedsbebothatroubleandanexpensetoyou.AndheremyuncleHarlowe,whenheknowshowIam,willneverwishanymantohaveme:no,notevenyou,whohavebeentheoccasionofit--barbarousandungrateful!--AlesscomplicatedvillanycostaTarquin--butIforgetwhatIwould

sayagain--

Thenthisisit--Inevershallbemyselfagain:Ihavebeenaverywickedcreature--avain,proud,poorcreature,fullofsecretpride--whichIcarriedoffunderanhumbleguise,anddeceivedeverybody--mysistersaysso--andnowIampunished--soletmebecarriedoutofthishouse,andoutofyoursight;andletmebeputintothatBedlamprivately,whichonceIsaw:butitwasasadsighttomethen!LittleasIthoughtwhatIshouldcometomyself!--ThatisallIwouldsay:thisisallIhavetowishfor--thenIshallbeoutofallyourways;andIshallbetakencareof;andbreadandwaterwithoutyourtormentings,willbedainties:andmystraw-bedtheeasiestIhavelainin--for--Icannottellhowlong!

Myclotheswillsellforwhatwillkeepmethere,perhapsaslongasIshalllive.But,Lovelace,dearLovelace,Iwillcallyou;foryouhavecostmeenough,I'msure!--don'tletmebemadeashowof,formyfamily'ssake;nay,foryourownsake,don'tdothat--forwhenIknowallIhavesuffered,whichyetIdonot,andnomatterifIneverdo--Imaybeapttoraveagainstyoubyname,andtellofallyourbasenesstoapoorhumbledcreature,thatoncewasasproudasanybody--butofwhatIcan'ttell--exceptofmyownfollyandvanity--butletthatpass--sinceIampunishedenoughforit--



So,suppose,insteadofBedlam,itwereaprivatemad-house,wherenobodycomes!--Thatwillbebetteragreatdeal.

But,anotherthing,Lovelace:don'tletthemusemecruellywhenIamthere--youhaveusedmecruellyenough,youknow!--Don'tletthemusemecruelly;forIwillbeverytractable;anddoasanybodywouldhavemetodo--exceptwhatyouwouldhavemedo--forthatIneverwill.--Anotherthing,Lovelace:don'tletthisgoodwoman,Iwasgoingtosayvilewoman;butdon'ttellherthat--becauseshewon'tletyousendmetothishappyrefuge,perhaps,ifsheweretoknowit--

Anotherthing,Lovelace:andletmehavepen,andink,andpaper,allowedme--itwillbeallmyamusement--buttheyneednotsendtoanybodyIshallwriteto,whatIwrite,becauseitwillbuttroublethem:andsomebodymaydoyouamischief,maybe--Iwishnotthatanybodydoanybodyamischiefuponmyaccount.

Youtellme,thatLadyBettyLawrance,andyourcousinMontague,wereheretotakeleaveofme;butthatIwasasleep,andcouldnotbewaked.SoyoutoldmeatfirstIwasmarried,youknow,andthatyouweremyhusband--Ah!Lovelace!looktowhatyousay.--Butletnotthem,(fortheywillsportwithmymisery,)letnotthatLadyBetty,letnotthatMissMontague,whatevertherealonesmaydo;norMrs.Sinclairneither,nor

anyofherlodgers,norhernieces,cometoseemeinmyplace--realones,Isay;for,Lovelace,Ishallfindoutallyourvillaniesintime--indeedIshall--soputmethereassoonasyoucan--itisforyourgood--thenallwillpassforravingsthatIcansay,as,Idoubtnomanypoorcreatures'exclamationsdopass,thoughtheremaybetoomuchtruthinthemforallthat--andyouknowIbegantobemadatHampstead--soyousaid.--Ah!villanousman!whathaveyounottoanswerfor!

***

Alittleintervalseemstobelentme.IhadbeguntolookoverwhatI

havewritten.Itisnotfitforanyonetosee,sofarasIhavebeenabletore-peruseit:butmyheadwillnothold,Idoubt,togothroughitall.IfthereforeIhavenotalreadymentionedmyearnestdesire,letmetellyouitisthis:thatIbesentoutofthisabominablehousewithoutdelay,andlockedupinsomeprivatemad-houseaboutthistown;forsuch,itseems,thereare;nevermoretobeseen,ortobeproducedtoanybody,exceptinyourownvindication,ifyoushouldbechargedwiththemurderofmyperson;amuchlightercrimethanthatofhonour,whichthegreatestvillainonearthhasrobbedmeof.Anddenymenotthismylastrequest,Ibeseechyou;andoneother,andthatis,nevertoletmeseeyoumore!Thissurelymaybegrantedto

Themiserablyabused

CLARISSAHARLOWE.

***

Iwillnotbearthyheavypreachments,Belford,uponthisaffectingletter.So,notawordofthatsort!Thepaper,thou'ltsee,isblisteredwiththetearsevenofthehardenedtranscriber;whichhasmadeherinkrunhereandthere.



Mrs.Sinclairisatrueheroine,and,Ithink,shamesusall.Andsheisawomantoo!Thou'ltsay,thebesetthingscorruptedbecometheworst.Butthisiscertain,thatwhateverthesexsettheirheartsupon,theymakethoroughworkofit.Andhenceitis,thatamischiefwhichwouldendinsimplerobberyamongmenrogues,becomesmurder,ifawomanbeinit.

Iknowthouwiltblamemeforhavinghadrecoursetoart.Butdonotphysiciansprescribeopiatesinacutecases,wheretheviolenceofthedisorderwouldbeapttothrowthepatientintoafeverordelirium?Iaver,thatmymotiveforthisexpedientwasmercy;norcoulditbeanythingelse.Forarape,thouknowest,tousrakes,isfarfrombeinganundesirablething.Nothingbutthelawstandsinourway,uponthataccount;andtheopinionofwhatamodestwomanwillsufferratherthanbecomeavivavoceaccuser,lessensmuchanhonestfellow'sapprehensionsonthatscore.Then,ifthesesomnivolencies[Ihatethewordopiatesonthisoccasion,]haveturnedherhead,thatisaneffecttheyfrequentlyhaveuponsomeconstitutions;andinthiscasewasratherthefaultofthedosethanthedesignofthegiver.

Butisnotwineitselfanopiateindegree?--Howmanywomenhavebeentakenadvantageofbywine,andotherstillmoreintoxicatingviands?--Letmetellthee,Jack,thattheexperienceofmanyofthepassivesex,

andtheconsciencesofmanymoreoftheactive,appealedto,willtestifythatthyLovelaceisnottheworstofvillains.NorwouldIhavetheeputmeuponclearingmyselfbycomparisons.

Ifsheescapeasettleddeliriumwhenmyplotsunravel,IthinkitisallIoughttobeconcernedabout.WhatthereforeIdesireofthee,is,that,iftwoconstructionsmaybemadeofmyactions,thouwiltaffordmethemostfavourable.Forthis,notonlyfriendship,butmyowningenuousness,whichhasfurnishedtheewiththeknowledgeofthefactsagainstwhichthouartsoreadytoinveigh,requireofthee.

***

Will.isjustreturnedfromanerrandtoHampstead;andacquaintsme,thatMrs.TownsendwasyesterdayatMrs.Moore's,accompaniedbythreeorfourroughfellows;agreaternumber(assupposed)atadistance.ShewasstrangelysurprisedatthenewsthatmyspouseandIareentirelyreconciled;andthattwofineladies,myrelations,cametovisither,andwenttotownwithher:wheresheisveryhappywithme.Shewassurewewerenotmarried,shesaid,unlessitwaswhilewewereatHampstead:andtheyweresuretheceremonywasnotperformedthere.Butthattheladyishappyandeasy,isunquestionable:andaflingwasthrownoutbyMrs.MooreandMrs.Bevisatmischief-makers,astheyknewMrs.TownsendtobeacquaintedwithMissHowe.

Now,sincemyfair-onecanneitherreceive,norsendawayletters,IamprettyeasyastothisMrs.Townsendandheremployer.AndIfancyMissHowewillbepuzzledtoknowwhattothinkofthematter,andafraidofsendingbyWilson'sconveyance;andperhapssupposethatherfriendslightsher;orhaschangedhermindinmyfavour,andisashamedtoownit;asshehasnothadananswertowhatshewrote;andwillbelievethattherusticdeliveredherlastletterintoherownhand.

MeantimeIhavealittleprojectcomeintomyhead,ofanewkind;just



foramusement-sake,that'sall:varietyhasirresistiblecharms.Icannotlivewithoutintrigue.Mycharmerhasnopassions;thatistosay,noneofthepassionsthatIwanthertohave.Sheengagesallmyreverence.IamatpresentmoreinclinedtoregretwhatIhavedone,thantoproceedtonewoffences:andshallregretittillIseehowshetakesitwhenrecovered.

ShallItelltheemyproject?'Tisnotahighone.--'Tisthis--togethithertoMrs.Moore,MissRawlins,andmywidowBevis;fortheyaredesiroustomakeavisittomyspouse,nowwearesohappytogether.And,ifIcanorderitright,Belton,Mowbray,Tourville,andI,willshowthemalittlemoreofthewaysofthiswickedtown,thantheyatpresentknow.Whyshouldtheybeacquaintedwithamanofmycharacter,andnotbethebetterandwiserforit?--Iwouldhaveeverybodyrailagainstrakeswithjudgmentandknowledge,iftheywillrail.Twoofthesewomengavemeagreatdealoftrouble:andthethird,Iamconfident,willforgiveamerryevening.

Thouwiltbecurioustoknowwhatthepersonsofthesewomenare,towhomIintendsomuchdistinction.IthinkIhavenotheretoforementionedanythingcharacteristicoftheirpersons.

Mrs.Mooreisawidowofaboutthirty-eight;alittlemortifiedbymisfortunes;butthoseareoftenthemerriestfolks,whenwarmed.She

hasgoodfeaturesstill;andiswhattheycallmuchofagentlewoman,andveryneatinherpersonanddress.Shehasgivenover,Ibelieve,allthoughtsofoursex:butwhenthedyingembersarerakedupaboutthehalf-consumedstump,therewillbefuelenoughleft,Idaresay,toblazeout,andgiveacomfortablewarmthtoahalf-starvedby-stander.

Mrs.Bevisiscomely;thatistosay,plump;aloverofmirth,andonewhomnogriefeverdweltwith,Idaresay,foraweektogether;abouttwenty-fiveyearsofage:Mowbraywillhaveverylittledifficultywithher,Ibelieve;foronecannotdoeverythingone'sself.Andyetsometimeswomenofthisfreecast,whenitcomestothepoint,answernotthepromisestheircheerfulforwardnessgivesamanwhohasaviewuponthem.

MissRawlinsisanagreeableyoungladyenough;butnotbeautiful.Shehassense,andwouldbethoughttoknowtheworld,asitiscalled;but,forherknowledge,ismoreindebtedtotheorythanexperience.Amerewhipt-syllabubknowledgethis,Jack,thatalwaysfailsthepersonwhotruststoit,whenitshouldholdtodoherservice.Forsuchyoungladieshavesomuchdependenceupontheirownunderstandingandwariness,aresomuchabovethecautionsthatthelessopinionativemaybebenefitedby,thattheirpresumptionisgenerallytheiroverthrow,whenattemptedbyamanofexperience,whoknowshowtoflattertheirvanity,andtomagnifytheirwisdom,inordertotakeadvantageoftheirfolly.But,forMissRawlins,ifIcanaddexperiencetohertheory,whatanaccomplishedpersonwillshebe!--Andhowmuchwillshebeobligedtome;

andnotonlyshe,butallthosewhomaybethebetterforthepreceptsshethinksherselfalreadysowellqualifiedtogive!Dearly,Jack,doIlovetoengagewiththeseprecept-givers,andexample-setters.

Now,Belford,althoughthereisnothingstrikinginanyofthesecharacters;yetmaywe,atapinch,makeagoodfrolickyhalf-daywiththem,if,afterwehavesoftenedtheirwaxattablebyencouragingviands,wecansetourwomenandthemintodancing:dancing,whichallwomenlove,andallmenshouldthereforepromote,forboththeirsakes.



Andthus,whenTourvillesings,Beltonfiddles,Mowbraymakesroughlove,andIsmooth;andthou,Jack,wiltbebythattimewellenoughtojoininthechorus;thedevil'sin'tifwedon'tmouldthemintowhatshapeweplease--ourownwomen,bytheirlaughingfreedoms,encouragingthemtobreakthroughalltheircustomaryreserves.Forwomentowomen,thouknowest,aregreatdarersandincentives:notoneofthemlovingtobeoutdoneoroutdared,whentheirheartsarethoroughlywarmed.

Iknow,atfirst,thedifficultywillbetheaccidentalabsenceofmydearMrs.Lovelace,towhomprincipallytheywilldesigntheirvisit:butifwecanexhilaratethem,theywon'tthenwishtoseeher;andIcanformtwentyaccidentsandexcuses,fromonehourtoanother,forherabsence,tilleachshallhaveasubjecttotakeupallherthoughts.

Iamreallysickatheartforafrolic,andhavenodoubtbutthiswillbeanagreeableone.Thesewomenalreadythinkmeawildfellow;nordotheylikemethelessforit,asIcanperceive;andIshalltakecare,thattheyshallbetreatedwithsomuchfreedombeforeoneanother'sfaces,thatinpolicytheyshallkeepeachother'scounsel.Andwon'tthisbedoingakindthingbythem?sinceitwillknitanindissolublebandofunionandfriendshipbetweenthreewomenwhoareneighbours,andatpresenthaveonlycommonobligationstooneanother:forthouwantestnottobetold,thatsecretsoflove,andsecretsofthisnature,aregenerallythestrongestcementoffemalefriendships.

But,afterall,ifmybelovedshouldbehappilyrestoredtoherintellects,wemayhavescenesarisebetweenusthatwillbesufficientlybusytoemployallthefacultiesofthyfriend,withoutlookingoutfornewoccasions.Already,asIhaveoftenobserved,hasshebeenthemeansofsavingscoresofhersex,yetwithoutherownknowledge.

SATURDAYNIGHT.

ByDorcas'saccountofherlady'sbehaviour,thedearcreatureseemstoberecovering.IshallgivetheearliestnoticeofthistotheworthyCapt.Tomlinson,thathemayapprizeuncleJohnofit.Imustbe

properlyenabled,fromthatquarter,topacifyher,or,atleast,torebateherfirstviolence.

LETTERXVII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SUNDAYAFTERNOON,SIXO'CLOCK,(JUNE18.)

Iwentoutearlythismorning,andreturnednottilljustnow;whenIwasinformedthatmybeloved,inmyabsence,hadtakenitintoherheadto

attempttogetaway.

Shetrippeddown,withaparceltiedupinahandkerchief,herhoodon;andwasactuallyintheentry,whenMrs.Sinclairsawher.

Pray,Madam,whippingbetweenherandthestreet-door,bepleasedtoletmeknowwhereyouaregoing?

Whohasarighttocontroulme?wastheword.



Ihave,Madam,byorderofyourspouse:and,kemboingherarms,assheowned,Idesireyouwillbepleasedtowalkupagain.

Shewouldhavespoken;butcouldnot:and,burstingintotears,turnedback,andwentuptoherchamber:andDorcaswastakentotaskforsufferinghertobeinthepassagebeforeshewasseen.

Thisshows,aswehopedlastnight,thatsheisrecoveringhercharmingintellects.

Dorcassays,shewasvisibletoherbutoncebeforethewholeday;andthensheseemedverysolemnandsedate.

Iwillendeavourtoseeher.Itmustbeinherownchamber,Isuppose;forshewillhardlymeetmeinthedining-room.Whatadvantagewilltheconfidenceofoursexgivemeoverthemodestyofher's,ifsheberecovered!--I,themostconfidentofmen:she,themostdelicateofwomen.Sweetsoul!methinksIhaveherbeforeme:herfaceaverted:speechlostinsighs--abashed--conscious--whatatriumphantaspectwillthisgiveme,whenIgazeonherdowncastcountenance!

***

ThismomentDorcastellsmeshebelievessheiscomingtofindmeout.Sheaskedherafterme:andDorcaslefther,dryingherred-swolneyesatherglass;[nodesignofmovingmebytears!]sighingtoosensiblyformycourage.ButtowhatpurposehaveIgonethusfar,ifIpursuenotmyprincipalend?Nicenessmustbealittleabated.Sheknowstheworst.Thatshecannotflyme;thatshemustseeme;andthatIcanlookherintoasweetconfusion;arecircumstancesgreatlyinmyfavour.Whatcanshedobutraveandexclaim?Iamusedtoravingandexclaiming--but,ifrecovered,Ishallseehowshebehavesuponthisourfirstsensibleinterviewafterwhatshehassuffered.

Hereshecomes.

LETTERXVIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.SUNDAYNIGHT.

Neverblamemeforgivingwaytohaveartusedwiththisadmirablecreature.Alltheprincesoftheair,orbeneathit,joiningwithme,couldneverhavesubduedherwhileshehadhersenses.

Iwillnotanticipate--onlytotellthee,thatIamtoomuchawakenedbyhertothinkofsleep,wereItogotobed;andsoshallhavenothingtodobuttowriteanaccountofouroddconversation,whileitissostronguponmymindthatIcanthinkofnothingelse.

Shewasdressedinawhitedamasknight-gown,withlessnegligencethanforsomedayspast.Iwassittingwithmypeninmyfingers;andstoodupwhenIfirstsawher,withgreatcomplaisance,asifthedaywerestillherown.Andsoindeeditis.



Sheenteredwithsuchdignityinhermannerasstruckmewithgreatawe,andpreparedmeforthepoorfigureImadeinthesubsequentconversation.Apoorfigureindeed!--ButIwilldoherjustice.

Shecameupwithquicksteps,prettyclosetome;awhitehandkerchiefinherhand;hereyesneitherfiercenormild,butveryearnest;andafixedsedatenessinherwholeaspect,whichseemedtobetheeffectofdeepcontemplation:andthussheaccostedme,withanairandactionthatIneversawequalled.

Youseebeforeyou,Sir,thewretch,whosepreferenceofyoutoallyoursexyouhaverewarded--asitindeeddeservedtoberewarded.Myfather'sdreadfulcursehasalreadyoperateduponmeintheveryletterofit,astothislife;anditseemstometooevidentthatitwillnotbeyourfaultthatitisnotentirelycompletedinthelossofmysoul,aswellasofmyhonour--whichyou,villanousman!haverobbedmeof,withabasenesssounnatural,soinhuman,thatitseemsyou,evenyou,hadnotthehearttoattemptit,tillmysensesweremadetheprevioussacrifice.

HereImadeanhesitatingefforttospeak,layingdownmypen:butsheproceeded!--Hearmeout,guiltywretch!--abandonedman!--Man,didIsay?--YetwhatnameelsecanI?sincethemortalworryingsofthefiercestbeastwouldhavebeenmorenatural,andinfinitelymorewelcome,thatwhatyouhaveactedbyme;andthatwithapremeditationandcontrivance

worthyonlyofthatsingleheartwhichnow,baseaswellasungratefulasthouart,seemstoquakewithinthee.--Andwellmay'stthouquake;wellmay'stthoutremble,andfalter,andhesitate,asthoudost,whenthoureflectestuponwhatIhavesufferedforthysake,anduponthereturnsthouhastmademe!

Bymysoul,Belford,mywholeframewasshaken:fornotonlyherlooksandheraction,buthervoice,sosolemn,wasinexpressiblyaffecting:andthenmycursedguilt,andherinnocence,andmerit,andrank,andsuperiorityoftalents,allstaredmeatthatinstantinthefacesoformidably,thatmypresentaccount,towhichsheunexpectedlycalledme,seemed,asIthenthought,toresemblethatgeneralone,towhichwearetoldweshallbesummoned,whenourconscienceshallbeouraccuser.

Butshehadhadtimetocollectallthepowersofhereloquence.Thewholedayprobablyinherintellects.AndthenIwasthemoredisappointed,asIhadthoughtIcouldhavegazedthedearcreatureintoconfusion--butitisplain,thatthesenseshehasofherwrongssetsthismatchlesswomanabovealllesser,allweakerconsiderations.

Mydear--mylove--I--I--Inever--nonever--lipstrembling,limbsquaking,voiceinward,hesitating,broken--neversurelydidmiscreantlooksolikeamiscreant!whilethussheproceeded,wavinghersnowyhand,withallthegracesofmovingoratory.

Ihavenoprideintheconfusionvisibleinthywholeperson.Ihave

beenallthedayprayingforacomposure,ifIcouldnotescapefromthisvilehouse,thatshouldoncemoreenablemetolookuptomydestroyerwiththeconsciousnessofaninnocentsufferer.Thouseestme,sincemywrongsarebeyondthepowerofwordstoexpress,thouseestme,calmenoughtowish,thatthoumay'stcontinueharassedbytheworkingsofthyownconscience,tilleffectualrepentancetakeholdofthee,thatsothoumay'stnotforfeitalltitletothatmercywhichthouhastnotshowntothepoorcreaturenowbeforethee,whohadsowelldeservedtomeetwithafaithfulfriendwhereshemetwiththeworstofenemies.



Buttellme,(fornodoubtthouhastsomeschemetopursue,)tellme,sinceIamaprisoner,asIfind,inthevilestofhouses,andhavenotafriendtoprotectorsaveme,whatthouintendestshallbecomeoftheremnantofalifenotworththekeeping!--Tellme,ifyettherearemoreevilsreservedforme;andwhetherthouhastenteredintoacompactwiththegranddeceiver,inthepersonofhishorridagentinthishouse;andiftheruinofmysoul,thatmyfather'scursemaybefulfilled,istocompletethetriumphsofsovileaconfederacy?--Answerme!--Say,ifthouhastcouragetospeakouttoherwhomthouhastruined,tellmewhatfartherIamtosufferfromthybarbarity?

Shestoppedhere,and,sighing,turnedhersweetfacefromme,dryingupwithherhandkerchiefthosetearswhichsheendeavouredtorestrain;and,whenshecouldnot,toconcealfrommysight.

AsItoldthee,Ihadpreparedmyselfforhighpassions,raving,flying,tearingexecration;thesetransientviolences,theworkingsofsuddengrief,andshame,andvengeance,wouldhavesetusuponaparwitheachother,andquittedscores.ThesehaveIbeenaccustomedto;andasnothingviolentislasting,withtheseIcouldhavewishedtoencounter.Butsuchamajesticcomposure--seekingme--whom,yetitisplain,byherattempttogetaway,shewouldhaveavoidedseeking--noLucretia-likevengeanceuponherselfinherthought--yetswallowedup,herwholemindswallowedup,asImaysay,byagriefsoheavy,as,inherownwords,to

bebeyondthepowerofspeechtoexpress--andtobeable,discomposedasshewas,totheverymorning,toputsuchahome-questiontome,asifshehadpenetratedmyfutureview--howcouldIavoidlookinglikeafool,andanswering,asbefore,inbrokensentencesandconfusion?

What--what-a--whathasbeendone--I,I,I--cannotbutsay--mustown--mustconfess--hem--hem----isnotright--isnotwhatshouldhavebeen--but-a--but--but--Iamtruly--truly--sorryforit--uponmysoulIam--and--and--willdoall--doeverything--dowhat--whateverisincumbentuponme--allthatyou--thatyou--thatyoushallrequire,tomakeyouamends!----

OBelford!Belford!whosethetriumphnow!HER'S,orMINE?

Amends!Othoutrulydespicablewretch!Thenliftinguphereyes--GoodHeaven!whoshallpitythecreaturewhocouldfallbysobaseamind!--Yet--[andthenshelookedindignantlyuponme!]yet,Ihatetheenot(baseandlow-souledasthouart!)halfsomuchasIhatemyself,thatIsawtheenotsoonerinthypropercolours!ThatIhopedeithermorality,gratitude,orhumanity,fromalibertine,who,tobealibertine,musthavegotoveranddefiedallmoralsanctions.*

*HercousinMorden'swordstoherinhisletterfromFlorence.SeeVol.IV.LetterXIX.

ShethencalleduponhercousinMorden'sname,asifhehadwarnedheragainstamanoffreeprinciples;andwalkedtowardsthewindow;herhandkerchiefathereyes.But,turningshorttowardsme,withanairofmingledscornandmajesty,[what,atthemoment,wouldIhavegivennevertohaveinjuredher!]Whatamendshastthoutopropose!Whatamendscansuchaoneasthoumaketoapersonofspirit,orcommonsense,fortheevilsthouhastsoinhumanelymademesuffer?

Assoon,Madam--assoon--as--assoonasyouruncle--or--notwaiting----



Thouwouldesttellme,Isuppose--Iknowwhatthouwouldesttellme--Butthinkestthou,thatmarriagewillsatisfyforaguiltlikethine?Destituteasthouhastmademebothoffriendsandfortune,Itoomuchdespisethewretch,whocouldrobhimselfofhiswife'svirtue,toendurethethoughtsoftheeinthelightthouseemesttohopeIwillaccepttheein!--

Ihesitatedaninterruption;butmymeaningdiedawayuponmytremblinglips.Icouldonlypronouncethewordmarriage--andthussheproceeded:

Letme,therefore,knowwhetherIamtobecontrouledinthefuturedisposalofmyself?Whether,inacountryofliberty,asthis,wherethesovereignofitmustnotbeguiltyofyourwickedness,andwhereyouneitherdursthaveattemptedit,hadIonefriendorrelationtolookuponme,Iamtobekepthereaprisoner,tosustainfreshinjuries?Whether,inaword,youintendtohindermefromgoingwheremydestinyshallleadme?

Afterapause--forIwasstillsilent:

Canyounotanswermethisplainquestion?--Iquitallclaim,allexpectation,uponyou--whatrighthaveyoutodetainmehere?

Icouldnotspeak.WhatcouldIsaytosuchaquestion?

Owretch!wringingherupliftedhands,hadInotbeenrobbedofmysenses,andthatinthebasestmanner--youbestknowhow--hadIbeenabletoaccountformyself,andyourproceedings,ortohaveknownbuthowthedayspassed--awholeweekshouldnothavegoneovermyhead,asIfindithasdone,beforeIhadtoldyou,whatInowtellyou--Thatthemanwhohasbeenthevillaintomeyouhavebeen,shallnevermakemehiswife.--Iwillwritetomyuncle,tolayasidehiskindintentionsinmyfavour--allmyprospectsareshutin--Igivemyselfupforalostcreatureastothisworld--hindermenotfromenteringuponalifeofseverepenitence,forcorresponding,afterprohibition,withawretchwhohastoowelljustifiedalltheirwarningsandinveteracy;andforthrowingmyselfintothepowerofyourvileartifices.LetmetrytosecuretheonlyhopeI

haveleft.ThisisalltheamendsIaskofyou.Irepeat,therefore,AmInowatlibertytodisposeofmyselfasIplease?

Nowcomesthefool,themiscreantagain,hesitatinghisbrokenanswer:Mydearestlove,Iamconfounded,quiteconfounded,atthethoughtofwhat--ofwhathasbeendone;andatthethoughtof--towhom.Isee,Isee,thereisnowithstandingyoureloquence!--Suchirresistibleproofsoftheloveofvirtue,foritsownsake,didIneverhearof,normeetwith,inallmyreading.Andifyoucanforgivearepentantvillain,whothusonhiskneesimploresyourforgiveness,[thendownIdropt,absolutelyinearnestinallIsaid,]Ivowbyallthat'ssacredandjust,(andmayathunderboltstrikemedeadatyourfeet,ifIamnotsincere!)thatIwillbymarriagebeforeto-morrownoon,withoutwaitingforyouruncle,

oranybody,doyouallthejusticeInowcandoyou.Andyoushalleveraftercontroulanddirectmeasyouplease,tillyouhavemadememoreworthyofyourangelicpuritythannowIam:norwillIpresumesomuchastotouchyourgarment,tillIhavethehonourtocallsogreatablessinglawfullymine.

Othouguilefulbetrayer!thereisajustGod,whomthouinvokest:yetthethunderboltdescendsnot;andthoulivesttoimprecateanddeceive!

Mydearestlife!rising;forIhopedshewasrelenting----



Hadstthounotsinnedbeyondthepossibilityofforgiveness,interruptedshe;andthishadbeenthefirsttimethatthusthousolemnlypromisestandinvokestthevengeancethouhastasoftendefied;thedesperatenessofmyconditionmighthaveinducedmetothinkoftakingawretchedchancewithamansoprofligate.But,afterwhatIhavesufferedbythee,itwouldbecriminalinmetowishtobindmysoulincovenanttoamansonearlyalliedtoperdition.

GoodGod!--howuncharitable!--Ioffernottodefend--wouldtoHeaventhatIcouldrecall--sonearlyalliedtoperdition,Madam!--Soprofligateaman,Madam!----

Ohowshortisexpressionofthycrimes,andofmysufferings!Suchpremeditationisthybaseness!Toprostitutethecharactersofpersonsofhonourofthyownfamily--andalltodeludeapoorcreature,whomthououghtest--ButwhytalkItothee?Bethycrimesuponthyhead!OncemoreIaskthee,AmI,oramInot,atmyownlibertynow?

Iofferedtospeakindefenceofthewomen,declaringthattheyreallyweretheverypersons----

Presumenot,interruptedshe,baseasthouart,tosayonewordinthineownvindication.Ihavebeencontemplatingtheirbehaviour,their

conversation,theirover-readyacquiescences,tomydeclarationsinthydisfavour;theirfree,yetaffectedly-reservedlightmanners:andnowthatthesadeventhasopenedmyeyes,andIhavecomparedfactsandpassagestogether,inthelittleintervalthathasbeenlentme,IwonderIcouldnotdistinguishthebehaviouroftheunmatron-likejilt,whomthoubroughtesttobetrayme,fromtheworthyladywhomthouhastthehonourtocallthyaunt:andthatIcouldnotdetectthesuperficialcreaturewhomthoupassedstuponmeforthevirtuousMissMontague.

Amazinguncharitablenessinaladysogoodherself!--Thatthehighspiritsthoseladieswereintoseeyou,shouldsubjectthemtosuchcensures!--Idomustsolemnlyvow,Madam----

Thattheywere,interruptingme,verilyandindeedLadyBettyLawranceandthycousinMontague!--Owretch!Iseebythysolemnaverment[Ihadnotyetaverredit,]whatcreditoughttobegiventoalltherest.HadInootherproof----

Interruptingher,Ibesoughtherpatientear.'Ihadfoundmyself,Itoldher,almostavowedlydespisedandhated.Ihadnohopeofgainingherlove,orherconfidence.Thelettershehadleftbehindher,onherremovaltoHampstead,sufficientlyconvincedmethatshewasentirelyunderMissHowe'sinfluence,andwaitedbutthereturnofaletterfromhertoenteruponmeasuresthatwoulddeprivemeofherforever:MissHowehadeverbeenmyenemy:moresothen,nodoubt,fromthecontentsofthelettershehadwrittentoheronherfirstcomingtoHampstead;that

Idarednottostandtheeventofsuchaletter;andwasgladofanopportunity,byLadyBetty'sandmycousin'smeans(thoughtheyknewnotmymotive)togetherbacktotown;far,atthetime,fromintendingtheoutragewhichmydespair,andherwantofconfidenceinme,putmesovilelyupon'--

Iwouldhaveproceeded;andparticularlywouldhavesaidsomethingofCaptainTomlinsonandheruncle;butshewouldnothearmefurther.Andindeeditwaswithvisibleindignation,andnotwithoutseveralangryinterruptions,thatsheheardmesaysomuch.



WouldIdare,sheaskedme,toofferatapalliationofmybaseness?Thetwowomen,shewasconvinced,wereimpostors.SheknewnotbutCaptainTomlinsonandMr.Mennellweresotoo.Butwhethertheyweresoornot,Iwas.Andsheinsisteduponbeingatherowndisposalfortheremainderofhershortlife--forindeedsheabhorredmeineverylight;andmoreparticularlyinthatinwhichIofferedmyselftoheracceptance.

And,sayingthis,sheflungfromme;leavingmeabsolutelyshockedandconfoundedatherpartofaconversationwhichshebeganwithsuchuncommon,howeversevere,composure,andconcludedwithsomuchsincereandunaffectedindignation.

Andnow,Jack,Imustaddressoneseriousparagraphparticularlytothee.

Ihavenotyettoucheduponcohabitation--heruncle'smediationshedoesnotabsolutelydiscredit,asIhadthepleasuretofindbyonehintinthisconversation--yetshesuspectsmyfutureviews,andhasdoubtaboutMennellandTomlinson.

Idosay,ifshecomefairlyatherlights,atherclues,orwhatshallIcallthem?herpenetrationiswonderful.

Butifshedonotcomeatthemfairly,thenisherincredulity,thenis

herantipathytomeevidentlyaccountedfor.Iwillspeakout--thoucouldstnot,surely,playmebooty,Jack?--Surelythoucouldstnotletthyweakpityforherleadtheetoanunpardonablebreachoftrusttothyfriend,whohasbeensounreservedinhiscommunicationstothee?

Icannotbelievetheecapableofsuchabaseness.Satisfyme,however,uponthishead.Imustmakeacursedfigureinhereye,vowingandprotesting,asIshallnotscrupleoccasionallytovowandprotest,ifallthetimeshehashadunquestionableinformationsofmyperfidy.Iknowthouaslittlefearestme,asIdothee,ifanypointofmanhood;andwiltscorntodenyit,ifthouhastdoneit,whenthushome-pressed.

AndhereIhaveagoodmindtostop,andwritenofarther,tillIhavethyanswer.

AndsoIwill.

MONDAYMORN.PASTTHREE.

LETTERXIX


MONDAYMORN.FIVEO'CLOCK(JUNE19.)

Imustwriteon.Nothingelsecandivertme:andIthinkthoucanstnothavebeenadogtome.

Iwouldfainhaveclosedmyeyes:butsleepfliesme.WellsaysHorace,astranslatedbyCowley:

Thehalcyonsleepwillneverbuildhisnest



Inanystormybreast.'TisnotenoughthathedoesfindCloudsanddarknessinthemind:Darknessbuthalfhisworkwilldo.'Tisnotenough:hemustfindquiettoo.

NowindeeddoIfrommyheartwishthatIhadneverknownthislady.Butwhowouldhavethoughttherehadbeensuchawomanintheworld?OfallthesexIhavehithertoknown,orheard,orreadof,itwasoncesubdued,andalwayssubdued.Thefirststrugglewasgenerallythelast;or,atleast,thesubsequentstrugglesweresomuchfainterandfainter,thatamanwouldratherhavethemthanbewithoutthem.ButhowknowIyet----

***

Itisnownearsix--thesunfortwohourspasthasbeenilluminatingeverythingaboutme:forthatimpartialorbshinesuponMotherSinclair'shouseaswellasuponanyother:butnothingwithinmecanitilluminate.

Atday-dawnIlookedthroughthekey-holeofmybeloved'sdoor.Shehaddeclaredshewouldnotputoffherclothesanymoreinthishouse.There

Ibeheldherinasweetslumber,whichIhopewillproverefreshingtoherdisturbedsenses;sittinginherelbow-chair,herapronoverherhead;herheadsupportedbyonesweethand,theotherhandhangingdownuponherside,inasleepylifelessness;halfofoneprettyfootonlyvisible.

Seethedifferenceinourcases!thoughtI:she,thecharminginjured,cansweetlysleep,whilethevarletinjurercannotclosehiseyes;andhasbeentrying,tonopurpose,thewholenighttodiverthismelancholy,andtoflyfromhimself!

Aseveryvicegenerallybringsonitsownpunishment,eveninthislife;ifanythingweretotemptmetodoubtoffuturepunishment,itwouldbe,

thattherecanhardlybeagreaterthanthatinwhichIatthisinstantexperienceinmyownremorse.

Ihopeitwillgooff.Ifnot,wellwillthedearcreaturebeavenged;forIshallbethemostmiserableofmen.

***

SIXO'CLOCK.

JustnowDorcastellsme,thatherladyispreparingopenly,andwithout

disguise,tobegone.Veryprobable.Thehumoursheflewawayfrommeinlastnighthasgivenmeexpectationofsuchanenterprize.

Now,Jack,tobethushatedanddespised!--AndifIhavesinnedbeyondforgiveness----

ButshehassentmeamessagebyDorcas,thatshewillmeetmeinthedining-room;anddesires[oddenough]thatthewretchmaybepresentattheconversationthatshallpassbetweenus.Thismessagegivesmehope.



NINEO'CLOCK.

Confoundedart,cunningvillany!--Bymysoul,shehadliketohaveslippedthroughmyfingers!ShemeantnothingbyhermessagebuttogetDorcasoutoftheway,andaclearcoast.Isafancieddistress,sufficienttojustifythisladyfordispensingwithherprinciples?Doesshenotshowmethatshecanwilfullydeceive,aswellasI?

Hadshebeeninthefore-house,andnopassagetogothroughtogetatthestreet-door,shehadcertainlybeengone.Butherhastebetrayedher:forSallyMartinhappeningtobeinthefore-parlour,andhearingaswiftermotionthanusual,andarustlingofsilks,asiffromsomebodyinahurry,lookedout;andseeingwhoitwas,steptbetweenherandthedoor,andsetherbackagainstit.

Youmustnotgo,Madam.Indeedyoumustnot.

Bywhatright?--Andhowdareyou?--Andsuch-likeimperiousairsthedearcreaturegaveherself.--WhileSallycalledoutforheraunt;andhalfadozenvoicedjoinedinstantlyinthecry,formetohastendown,tohastendowninamoment.

IwasgravelyinstructingDorcasabovestairs,andwonderingwhatwould

bethesubjectoftheconversationtowhichthewenchwastobeawitness,whentheseoutcriesreachedmyears.AnddownIflew.--Andtherewasthecharmingcreature,thesweetdeceiver,pantingforbreath,herbackagainstthepartition,aparcelinherhand,[womenmakenoexcursionswithouttheirparcels,]Sally,Polly,(butPollyobliginglypleadedforher,)themother,Mabell,andPeter,(thefootmanofthehouse,)abouther;all,however,keepingtheirdistance;themotherandSallybetweenherandthedoor--inhersoftragethedearsoulrepeating,Iwillgo--nobodyhasaright--Iwillgo--ifyoukillme,women,Iwon'tgoupagain!

Assoonasshesawme,shesteptapaceortwotowardsme;Mr.Lovelace,Iwillgo!saidshe--doyouauthorizethesewomen--whatrighthavethey,

oryoueither,tostopme?

Isthis,mydear,preparativetotheconversationyouledmetoexpectinthedining-room?Anddoyouthing[sic]Icanpartwithyouthus?--DoyouthinkIwill.

AndamI,Sir,tobethusbeset?--Surroundedthus?--Whathavethesewomentodowithme?

Idesiredthemtoleaveus,allbutDorcas,whowasdownassoonasI.Ithenthoughtitrighttoassumeanairofresolution,havingfoundmytamenesssogreatlytriumphedover.Andnow,mydear,saidI,(urgingherreluctantfeet,)bepleasedtowalkintothefore-parlour.Here,

sinceyouwillnotgoupstairs,herewemayholdourparley;andDorcaswillbewitnesstoit.Andnow,Madam,seatingher,andstickingmyhandsinmysides,yourpleasure!

Insolentvillain!saidthefuriouslady.Andrising,rantothewindow,andthrewupthesash,[sheknewnot,Isuppose,thattherewereironrailsbeforethewindows.]And,whenshefoundshecouldnotgetoutintothestreet,claspingherupliftedhandstogether,havingdroptherparcel--FortheloveofGod,goodhonestman!--FortheloveofGod,mistress--[totwopassersby,]apoor,apoorcreature,saidshe,ruined!



----

Iclaspedherinmyarms,peoplebeginningtogatheraboutthewindow:andthenshecriedoutMurder!help!help!andcarriedheruptothedining-room,inspiteofherlittleplottingheart,(asImaynowcallit,)althoughsheviolentlystruggled,catchingholdofthebanistershereandthere,asshecould.Iwouldhaveseatedherthere;butshesunkdownhalf-motionless,paleasashes.Andaviolentburstoftearshappilyrelievedher.

Dorcasweptoverher.Thewenchwasactuallymovedforher!

Violenthystericssucceeded.IlefthertoMabell,Dorcas,andPolly;thelatterthemostsupportabletoherofthesisterhood.

Thisattempt,soresolutelymade,alarmedmenotalittle.

Mrs.Sinclairandhernymphs,aremuchmoreconcerned;becauseofthereputationoftheirhouseastheycallit,havingreceivedsomeinsults(brokenwindowsthreatened)tomakethemproducetheyoungcreaturewhocriedout.

Whilethemobbishinquisitorswereintheheightoftheiroffice,thewomencamerunninguptome,toknowwhattheyshoulddo;aconstable

beingactuallyfetched.Gettheconstableintotheparlour,saidI,withthreeorfouroftheforwardestofthemob,andproduceoneofthenymphs,onion-eyed,inamoment,withdisorderedhead-dressandhandkerchief,andletherownherselftheperson:theoccasion,afemaleskirmish:butsatisfiedwiththejusticedoneher.Thengiveadramortwotoeachfellow,andallwillbewell.

ELEVENO'CLOCK.

AlldoneasIadvised;andalliswell.

Mrs.Sinclairwishesshehadneverseenthefaceofsoskittishalady;andsheandSallyareextremelypressingwithme,toleavetheperversebeautytotheirbreaking,astheycallit,forfourorfivedays.ButIcursedthemintosilence;onlyorderingdoubleprecautionforthefuture.

Polly,thoughsheconsoledthedearperverseoneallshecould,whenwithher,insistsuponittome,thatnothingbutterrorwillprocuremetolerableusage.

Dorcaswaschallengedbythewomenuponhertears.Sheownedthemreal.Saidshewasashamedofherself:butcouldnothelpit.Sosincere,sounyieldingagrief,insosweetalady!--

Thewomenlaughedather;butIbidhermakenoapologiesforhertears,normindtheirlaughing.Iwasgladtoseethemsoready.Goodusemightbemadeofsuchstrangers.Inshort,Iwouldnothaveherindulgethemoften,andtryifitwerenotpossibletogainherlady'sconfidencebyherconcernforher.

Shesaidthatherladydidtakekindnoticeofthemtoher;andwasgladtoseesuchtokensofhumanityinher.



Wellthen,saidI,yourpart,whetheranythingcomeofitornot,istobetender-hearted.Itcandonoharm,ifnogood.Buttakecareyouarenottoosuddenly,ortooofficiouslycompassionate.

SoDorcaswillbeahumane,goodsortofcreature,Ibelieve,veryquicklywithherlady.Andasitbecomeswomentobeso,andasmybelovediswillingtothinkhighlyofherownsex;itwillthemorereadilypasswithher.

Ithoughttohavehadonetrial(havinggonesofar)forcohabitation.Butwhathopecantherebeofsucceeding?--Sheisinvincible!--Againstallmymotions,againstallmyconceptions,(thinkingofherasawoman,andintheverybloomofhercharms,)sheisabsolutelyinvincible.Mywholeview,atthepresent,istodoherlegaljustice,ifIcanbutoncemoregetheroutofheraltitudes.

Theconsentofsuchawomanmustmakeherevernew,evercharming.Butastonishing!Canthewantofachurch-ceremonymakesuchadifference!

Sheowesmeherconsent;forhithertoIhavehadnothingtoboastof.Allofmyside,hasbeendeepremorse,anguishofmind,andloveincreasedratherthanabated.

Howherproudrejectionstingsme!--AndyetIhopestilltogetherto

listentomystoriesofthefamily-reconciliation,andofheruncleandCapt.Tomlinson--andasshehasgivenmeapretencetodetainheragainstherwill,shemustseeme,whetherintemperornot.--Shecannothelpit.Andiflovewillnotdo,terror,asthewomenadvise,mustbetried.

Anicepart,afterall,hasmybelovedtoact.Ifsheforgivemeeasily,Iresumeperhapsmyprojects:--ifshecarryherrejectionintoviolence,thatviolencemaymakemedesperate,andoccasionfreshviolence.Sheought,sinceshethinksshehasfoundthewomenout,toconsiderwheresheis.

Iamconfoundedlyoutofconceitwithmyself.IfIgiveupmycontrivances,myjoyinstratagem,andplot,andinvention,Ishallbe

butacommonman;suchanotherdullheavycreatureasthyself.Yetwhatdoesevenmysuccessinmymachinationsbringmebutregret,disgrace,repentance?ButIamovermatched,egregiouslyovermatched,bythiswoman.Whattodowithher,orwithouther,Iknownot.

LETTERXX


IhavethismomentintelligencefromSimonParsons,oneofLordM.'s

stewards,thathisLordshipisveryill.Simon,whoismyobsequiousservant,invirtueofmypresumptiveheirship,givesmeahintinhisletter,thatmypresenceatM.Hallwillnotbeamiss.SoImustaccelerate,whateverbethecourseIshallbeallowedorcompelledtotake.

Nobadprospectsforthischarmingcreature,iftheoldpeerwouldbesokindastosurrender;andmanyasummonshasthisgoutgivenhim.Agood8000Â£.a-year,andperhapsthetitlereversionary,orastillhigher,wouldhelpmeupwithher.



Proudlyasthisladypretendstobeaboveallpride,grandeurwillhaveitscharmswithher;forgrandeuralwaysmakesaman'sfaceshineinawoman'seye.Ihaveaprettygood,becauseaclear,estate,asitis.Butwhatanoblevarietyofmischiefwill8000Â£.a-year,enableamantodo?

Perhapsthou'ltsay,Idoalreadyallthatcomesintomyhead;butthat'samistake--notonehalfIwillassurethee.Andevengoodfolks,asIhaveheard,lovetohavethepowerofdoingmischief,whethertheymakeuseofitornot.ThelateQueenAnne,whowasaverygoodwoman,wasalwaysfondofprerogative.Andherministers,inhername,inmoreinstancesthanone,madeaministerialuseofthisherfoible.

***

Butnow,atlast,amItobeadmittedtothepresenceofmyangryfair-one;afterthreedenials,nevertheless;andaperemptoryfromme,byDorcas,thatImustseeherinherchamber,ifIcannotseeherinthedining-room.

Dorcas,however,tellsmethatshesays,ifshewereatherownliberty,

shewouldneverseememore;andthatshehadbeenaskingafterthecharactersandconditionsoftheneighbours.Isuppose,nowshehasfoundhervoice,tocalloutforhelpfromthem,iftherewereanytohearher.

Shewillhaveitnow,itseems,thatIhadthewickednessfromtheverybeginning,tocontrive,forherruin,ahousesoconvenientfordreadfulmischief.

Dorcasbegsofhertobepacified--entreatshertoseemewithpatience--tellsherthatIamoneofthemostdeterminedofmen,asshehasheardsay.Thatgentlenessmaydowithme;butthatnothingelsewill,shebelieves.Andwhat,asherladyship(asshealwaysstylesher,)is

married,ifIhadbrokenmyoath,orintendedtobreakit!--

Shehintedplainenoughtothehonestwench,thatshewasnotmarried.ButDorcaswouldnotunderstandher.

Thisshowssheisresolvedtokeepnomeasures.Andnowistobeatrialofskill,whethersheshallornot.

DorcashashintedtohermyLord'sillness,asapieceofintelligencethatdroptinconversationfromme.

ButhereIstop.Mybeloved,pursuanttomyperemptorymessage,isjustgoneupintothedining-room.

LETTERXXI

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.MONDAYAFTERNOON.

Pityme,Jack,forpity'ssake;since,ifthoudostnot,nobodyelse



will:andyetneverwasthereamanofmygeniusandlivelytemperthatwanteditmore.Weareapttoattributetothedevileverythinghappenstous,whichwewouldnothavehappen:buthere,being,(asperhapsthou'ltsay,)thedevilmyself,myplaguesarisefromanangel.Isupposeallmankindistobeplaguedbyitscontrary.

Shebeganwithmelikeatruewoman,[sheinthefault,Itobeblamed,]themomentIenteredthedining-room:nottheleastapology,nottheleastexcuse,fortheuproarshehadmade,andthetroubleshehadgivenme.

Icome,saidshe,intothydetestedpresence,becauseIcannothelpit.ButwhyamItobeimprisonedhere?--Althoughtonopurpose,Icannothelp----

DearestMadam,interruptedI,givenotwaytosomuchviolence.Youmustknow,thatyourdetentionisentirelyowingtothedesireIhavetomakeyoualltheamendsthatisinmypowertomakeyou.Andthis,aswellforyoursakeasmyown.Surelythereisstillonewaylefttorepairthewrongsyouhavesuffered----

Canstthoublotoutthepastweek!Severalweekspast,Ishouldsay;eversinceIhavebeenwiththee?Canstthoucallbacktime?--Ifthoucanst----

Surely,Madam,againinterruptingher,ifImaybepermittedtocallyoulegallymine,Imighthavebutanticip----

Wretch,thatthouart!Saynotanotherworduponthissubject.Whenthouvowedst,whenthoupromisedstatHampstead,IhadbeguntothinkthatImustbethine.IfIhadconsented,attherequestofthoseIthoughtthyrelations,thiswouldhavebeenaprincipalinducement,thatIcouldthenhavebroughtthee,whatwasmostwanted,anunsulliedhonourindowry,toawretchdestituteofallhonour;andcouldhavemetthegratulationsofafamilytowhichthylifehasbeenonecontinueddisgrace,withaconsciousnessofdeservingtheirgratulations.Butthinkestthou,thatIwillgiveaharlotniecetothyhonourableuncle,

andtothyrealaunts;andacousintothycousinsfromabrothel?forsuch,inmyopinion,isthisdetestedhouse!--Then,liftingupherclaspedhands,'GreatandgoodGodofHeaven,'saidshe,'givemepatiencetosupportmyselfundertheweightofthoseafflictions,whichthou,forwiseandgoodends,thoughatpresentimpenetrablebyme,hastpermitted!'

Then,turningtowardsme,whoknewneitherwhattosaytoher,norformyself,Irenouncetheeforever,Lovelace!--Abhorredofmysoul!foreverIrenouncethee!--Seekthyfortuneswheresoeverthouwilt!--onlynow,thatthouhastalreadyruinedme!--

Ruinedyou,Madam--theworldneednot--Iknewnotwhattosay.

Ruinedmeinmyowneyes;andthatisthesametomeasifalltheworldknewit--hindermenotfromgoingwhithermymysteriousdestinyshallleadme.

Whyhesitateyou,Sir?Whatrighthaveyoutostopme,asyoulatelydid;andtobringmeupbyforce,myhandsandarmsbruisedbyyourviolence?Whatrighthaveyoutodetainmehere?

Iamcuttotheheart,Madam,withinvectivessoviolent.Iambuttoo



sensibleofthewrongIhavedoneyou,orIcouldnotbearyourreproaches.Themanwhoperpetratesavillany,andresolvestogoonwithit,showsnotthecompunctionIshow.Yet,ifyouthinkyourselfinmypower,Iwouldcautionyou,Madam,nottomakemedesperate.Foryoushallbemine,ormylifeshallbetheforfeit!Norislifeworthhavingwithoutyou!--

Bethine!--Ibethine!--saidthepassionatebeauty.Ohowlovelyinherviolence!

Yes,Madam,bemine!Irepeatyoushallbemine!Myverycrimeisyourglory.Mylove,myadmirationofyouisincreasedbywhathaspassed--andsoitought.Iamwilling,Madam,tocourtyourreturningfavour;butletmetellyou,werethehousebesetbyathousandarmedmen,resolvedtotakeyoufromme,theyshouldnoteffecttheirpurpose,whileIhadlife.

Inever,neverwillbeyour's,saidshe,claspingherhandstogether,andliftinguphereyes!--Ineverwillbeyour's!

Wemayyetseemanyhappyyears,Madam.Allyourfriendsmaybereconciledtoyou.Thetreatyforthatpurposeisingreaterforwardnessthanyouimagine.Youknowbetterthantothinktheworseofyourselfforsufferingwhatyoucouldnothelp.EnjoinbutthetermsIcanmake

mypeacewithyouupon,andIwillinstantlycomply.Never,never,repeatedshe,willIbeyour's!

Onlyforgiveme,mydearestlife,thisonetime!--Avirtuesoinvincible!whatfurtherviewcanIhaveagainstyou?--HaveIattemptedanyfurtheroutrage?--Ifyouwillbemine,yourinjurieswillbeinjuriesdonetomyself.Youhavetoowellguessedattheunnaturalartsthathavebeenused.Butcanagreatertestimonybegivenofyourvirtue?--AndnowIhaveonlytohope,thatalthoughIcannotmakeyoucompleteamends,yetyouwillpermitmetomakeyoualltheamendsthatcanpossiblybemade.

Here[sic]meout,Ibeseechyou,Madam;forshewasgoingtospeakwith

anaspectunpacifiedlyangry:theGod,whomyouserve,requiresbutrepentanceandamendment.Imitatehim,mydearestlove,andblessmewiththemeansofreformingacourseoflifethatbeginstobehatefultome.Thatwasonceyourfavouritepoint.Resumeit,dearestcreature,incharitytoasoul,aswellasbody,whichonce,asIflatteredmyself,wasmorethanindifferenttoyou,resumeit.Andletto-morrow'ssunwitnesstoourespousals.

Icannotjudgethee,saidshe;buttheGODtowhomthousoboldlyreferrestcan,and,assurethyself,Hewill.But,ifcompunctionhasreallytakenholdofthee--if,indeed,thouarttouchedforthyungratefulbaseness,andmeanestanythingbythispleadingtheholyexamplethourecommendesttomyimitation;inthisthypretended

repentantmoment,letmesifttheethoroughly,andbythyanswerIshalljudgeofthesincerityofthypretendeddeclarations.

Tellme,then,isthereanyrealityinthetreatythouhaspretendedtobeonfootbetweenmyuncleandCapt.Tomlinson,andthyself?--Say,andhesitatenot,isthereanytruthinthatstory?--But,remember,iftherebenot,andthouavowestthatthereis,whatfurthercondemnationattendstothyaverment,ifitbeassolemnasIrequireittobe!

Thiswasacursedthrust!WhatcouldIsay!--Surelythismercilesslady



isresolvedtod--nme,thoughtI,andyetaccusesmeofadesignagainsthersoul!--ButwasInotobligedtoproceedasIhadbegun?

Inshort,Isolemnlyaverredthattherewas!--Howonecrime,asthegoodfolkssay,bringsonanother!

Iadded,thattheCaptainhadbeenintown,andwouldhavewaitedonher,hadshenotbeenindisposed;thathewentdownmuchafflicted,aswellonheraccount,asonthatofheruncle;thoughIhadnotacquaintedhimeitherwiththenatureofherdisorder,ortheever-to-be-regrettedoccasionofit,havingtoldhimthatitwasaviolentfever;Thathehadtwicesince,byheruncle'sdesire,sentuptoinquireafterherhealth;andthatIhadalreadydispatchedamanandhorsewithaletter,toacquainthim,(andherunclethroughhim,)withherrecovery;makingitmyearnestrequest,thathewouldrenewhisapplicationtoheruncleforthefavourofhispresenceattheprivatecelebrationsofournuptials;andthatIexpectedananswer,ifnotthisnight,asto-morrow.

Letmeasktheenext,saidshe,(thouknowesttheopinionIhaveofthewomenthoubroughtesttomeatHampstead;andwhohaveseducedmehithertomyruin;letmeaskthee,)If,reallyandtruly,theywereLadyBettyLawranceandthycousinMontague?--Whatsayestthou--hesitatenot--whatsayestthoutothisquestion?

Astonishing,mydear,thatyoushouldsuspectthem!--But,knowingyourstrangeopinionofthem,whatcanIsaytobebelieved?

Andisthistheanswerthoureturnestme?Dostthouthusevademyquestion?Butletmeknow,forIamtryingthysinceritynow,andallshalljudgeofthynewprofessionsbythyanswertothisquestion;letmeknow,Irepeat,whetherthosewomenbereallyLadyBettyLawranceandthycousinMontague?

Letme,mydearestlove,beenabledto-morrowtocallyoulawfullymine,andwewillsetoutthenextday,ifyouplease,toBerkshiretomyLordM.'s,wheretheybothareatthistime;andyoushallconvinceyourselfbyyourowneyes,andbyyourownears;whichyouwillbelievesooner

thanallIcansayorswear.

Now,Belford,Ihadreallysomeapprehensionoftreacheryfromthee;whichmademesomiserablyevade;forelse,Icouldassafelyhavesworntothetruthofthis,astothatoftheformer:butshepressingmestillforacategoricalanswer,Iventuredplumb;andsworetoit,[lover'soaths,Jack!]thattheywerereallyandtrulyLadyBettyLawranceandmycousinMontague.

Sheliftedupherhandsandeyes--WhatcanIthink!--whatcanIthink!

Youthinkmeadevil,Madam;averydevil!oryoucouldnotafteryouhaveputthesequestionstome,seemtodoubtthetruthofanswersso

solemnlyswornto.

AndifIdothinktheeso,haveInotcause?Isthereanothermanintheworld,(Ihopeforthesakeofhumannature,thereisnot,)whocouldactbyanypoorfriendlesscreatureasthouhastactedbyme,whomthouhastmadefriendless--andwho,beforeIknewthee,hadforafriendeveryonewhoknewme?

Itoldyou,Madam,beforethatLadyBettyandmycousinwereactuallyhere,inordertotakeleaveofyou,beforetheysetoutforBerkshire:



buttheeffectsofmyungratefulcrime,(such,withshameandremorse,Iownittobe,)werethereasonyoucouldnotseethem.NorcouldIbefondthattheyshouldseeyou;sincetheyneverwouldhaveforgivenme,hadtheyknownwhathadpassed--andwhatreasonhadItoexpectyoursilenceonthesubject,hadyoubeenrecovered?

Itsignifiesnothingnow,thatthecauseoftheirappearancehasbeenansweredinmyruin,whoorwhattheyare:butifthouhastaverredthussolemnlytotwofalsehoods,whatawretchdoIseebeforeme!

Ithoughtshehadnowreasontobesatisfied;andIbeggedhertoallowmetotalktoherofto-morrow,asofthehappiestdayofmylife.Wehavethelicense,Madam--andyoumustexcuseme,thatIcannotletyougohencetillIhavetriedeverywayIcantoobtainyourforgiveness.

AndamIthen,[withakindoffranticwildness,]tobedetainedaprisonerinthishorridhouse--amI,Sir?--Takecare!takecare!holdingupherhand,menacing,howyoumakemedesperate!IfIfall,thoughbymyownhand,inquisitionwillbemadeformyblood;andbenotoutinthyplot,Lovelace,ifitshouldbeso--makesurework,Ichargethee--digaholedeepenoughtocraminandconcealthisunhappybody;for,dependuponit,thatsomeofthosewhowillnotstirtoprotectmeliving,willmoveheavenandearthtoavengemedead!

Ahorriddearcreature!--Bymysoulshemademeshudder!Shehadneedindeedtotalkofherunhappinessinfallingintothehandsoftheonlymanintheworld,whocouldhaveusedherasIhaveusedher--sheistheonlywomanintheworld,whocouldhaveshockedanddisturbedmeasshehasdone.Soweareuponafootinthatrespect.AndIthinkIhavetheworstofitbymuch:sinceverylittlehasbeenmyjoy--verymuchmytrouble.Andherpunishment,asshecallsit,isover:butwhenminewill,orwhatitmaybe,whocantell?

Here,onlyrecapitulating,(think,then,howImustbeaffectedatthetime,)Iwasforcedtoleaveoff,andsingasongtomyself.Iaimedatalivelyair;butIcroakedratherthansung.AndfellintotheolddismalthirtiethofJanuarystrain;Ihemmedupforasprightliernote;

butitwouldnotdo;andatlastIended,likeamalefactor,inadeadpsalmmelody.

Heigh-ho!--Igapelikeanunfledgedkiteinitsnest,wantingtoswallowachicken,bobbedatitsmouthbyitsmaraudingdam!--

Whata-devilailsme?--Icanneitherthinknorwrite!

Liedown,pen,foramoment!

LETTERXXII


Thereiscertainlyagooddealintheobservation,thatitcostsamantentimesmorepainstobewicked,thanitwouldcosthimtobegood.WhataconfoundednumberofcontrivanceshaveIhadrecourseto,inordertocarrymypointwiththischarmingcreature;andyetafterall,howhaveIpuzzledmyselfbyit;andyetamneartumblingintothepitwhichitwastheendofallmyplotstoshun!WhatahappymanhadIbeenwith



suchanexcellence,couldIhavebroughtmymindtomarrywhenIfirstprevaileduponhertoquitherfather'shouse!Butthen,asIhaveoftenreflected,howhadIknown,thatabutblossomingbeauty,whocouldcarryonaprivatecorrespondence,andrunsuchrisqueswithanotoriouswildfellow,wasnotpromptedbyinclination,whichonedaymightgivesuchafree-liverasmyselfasmuchpaintoreflectupon,as,atthetimeitgavemepleasure?Thourememberestthehost'staleinAriosto.Andthyexperience,aswellasmine,canfurnishouttwentyFiametta'sinproofoftheimbecilityofthesex.

Buttoproceedwithmynarrative.

Thedearcreatureresumedthetopicherheartwassofirmlyfixedupon;andinsisteduponquittingtheodioushouse,andthatinveryhighterms.

Iurgedhertomeetmethenextdayatthealtarineitherofthetwochurchesmentionedinthelicense.AndIbesoughther,whateverwasherresolution,toletmedebatethismattercalmlywithher.

If,shesaid,IwouldhavehergivewhatIdesiredtheleastmoment'sconsideration,Imustnothinderherfrombeingherownmistress.TowhatpurposedidIaskherconsent,ifshehadnotapowerovereitherherownpersonoractions?

Willyougivemeyourhonour,Madam,ifIconsenttoyourquittingahousesodisagreeabletoyou?--

Myhonour,Sir!saidthedearcreature--Alas!--Andturnedweepingfrommewithinimitablegrace--asifshehadsaid--Alas!--youhaverobbedmeofmyhonour!

Ihopedthen,thatherangrypassionsweresubsiding;butIwasmistaken;for,urgingherwarmlyfortheday;andthatforthesakeofourmutualhonour,andthehonourofbothourfamilies;inthishigh-flownandhigh-souledstrainsheansweredme:

Andcanstthou,Lovelace,besomean--astowishtomakeawifeofthe

creaturethouhastinsulted,dishonoured,andabused,asthouhastme?Wasitnecessarytohumblemedowntothelowlevelofthybaseness,beforeIcouldbeawifemeetforthee?Thouhadstafather,whowasamanofhonour:amother,whodeservedabetterson.Thouhastanuncle,whoisnodishonourtothePeerageofakingdom,whosepeersaremorerespectablethanthenobilityofanyothercountry.Thouhastotherrelationsalso,whomaybethyboast,thoughthoucanstnotbetheirs--andcanstthounotimagine,thatthouhearestthemcallinguponthee;thedeadfromtheirmonuments;thelivingfromtheirlaudablepride;nottodishonourthyancientandsplendidhouse,byenteringintowedlockwithacreaturewhomthouhastlevelledwiththedirtofthestreet,andclassedwiththevilestofhersex?

Iextolledhergreatnessofsoul,andhervirtue.Iexecratedmyselfformyguilt:andtoldher,howgratefultothemanesofmyancestors,aswellastothewishesoftheliving,thehonourIsupplicatedforwouldbe.

Butstillsheinsisteduponbeingafreeagent;ofseeingherselfinotherlodgingsbeforeshewouldgivewhatIurgedtheleastconsideration.Norwouldshepromisemefavoureventhen,ortopermitmyvisits.Howthen,asIaskedher,couldIcomply,withoutresolvingtoloseherforever?



Sheputherhandtoherforeheadoftenasshetalked;andatlast,pleadingdisorderinherhead,retired;neitherofussatisfiedwiththeother.Butshetentimesmoredissatisfiedwithme,thanIwithher.

Dorcasseemstobecomingintofavourwithher--

Whatnow!--Whatnow!

MONDAYNIGHT.

Howdeterminedisthislady!--Againhadsheliketohaveescapedus!--Whatafixedresentment!--Sheonly,Ifind,assumedalittlecalm,inordertoquietsuspicion.Shewasgotdown,andactuallyhadunboltedthestreet-door,beforeIcouldgettoher;alarmedasIwasbyMrs.Sinclair'scookmaid,whowastheonlyonethatsawherflythroughthepassage:yetlightningwasnotquickerthanI.

AgainIbroughtherbacktothedining-room,withinfinitereluctanceonherpart.And,beforeherface,orderedaservanttobeplacedconstantlyatthebottomofthestairsforthefuture.

Sheseemedevenchokedwithgriefanddisappointment.

Dorcaswasexceedinglyassiduousabouther;andconfidentlygaveitasherownopinion,thatherdearladyshouldbepermittedtogotoanotherlodging,sincethiswassodisagreeabletoher:wereshetobekilledforsayingso,shewouldsayit.AndwasgoodDorcasforthisafterwards.

Butforsometimethedearcreaturewasallpassionandviolence--

Isee,Isee,saidshe,whenIhadbroughtherup,whatIamtoexpectfromyournewprofessions,Ovilestofmen!--

HaveIofferedtyou,mybelovedcreature,anythingthatcanjustifythisimpatienceafteramorehopefulcalm?

Shewrungherhands.Shedisorderedherhead-dress.Shetoreherruffles.Shewasinaperfectphrensy.

Idreadedherreturningmalady:but,entreatyratherexasperating,Iaffectedanangryair.--Ibidherexpecttheworstshehadtofear--andwasmenacingon,inhopestointimidateher;when,droppingtomyfeet,

'Twillbeamercy,saidshe,thehighestactofmercyyoucando,tokillmeoutrightuponthisspot--thishappyspot,asIwill,inmylastmoments,callit!--Then,baring,withastillmorefranticviolence,partofherenchantingneck--Here,here,saidthesoul-harrowingbeauty,letthypointedmercyenter!andIwillthankthee,andforgivetheeforall

thedreadfulpast!--WithmylatestgaspwillIforgiveandthankthee!--Orhelpmetothemeans,andIwillmyselfputoutofthewaysomiserableawretch!Andblesstheeforthosemeans!

Whyallthisextravagantpassion?Whyalltheseexclamations?HaveIofferedanynewinjurytoyou,mydearestlife?Whataphrensyisthis!AmInotreadytomakeyouallthereparationthatIcanmakeyou?HadInotreasontohope--

No,no,no,no,asbefore,shakingherheadwithwildimpatience,as



resolvednottoattendtowhatIsaid.

Myresolutionsaresohonourable,ifyouwillpermitthemtotakeeffect,thatIneednotbesolicitouswhereyougo,ifyouwillbutpermitmyvisits,andreceivemyvows.--AndGodismywitness,thatIbringyounotbackfromthedoorwithanyviewtoyourdishonour,butthecontrary:andthismomentIwillsendforaministertoputanendtoallyourdoubtsandfears.

Saythis,andsayathousandtimesmore,andbindeverywordwithasolemnappealtothatGodwhomthouartaccustomedtoinvoketothetruthofthevilestfalsehoods,andallwillstillbeshortofwhatthouhasvowedandpromisedtome.And,werenotmyhearttoabhorthee,andtoriseagainstthee,forthyperjuries,asitdoes,Iwouldnot,Itelltheeoncemore,Iwouldnot,bindmysoulincovenantwithsuchaman,forathousandworlds!

Composeyourself,however,Madam;foryourownsake,composeyourself.Permitmetoraiseyouup;abhorredasIamofyoursoul!

Nay,ifImustnottouchyou;forshewildlyslaptmyhands;butwithsuchasweetpassionateair,herbosomheavingandthrobbingasshelookeduptome,thatalthoughIwasmostsincerelyenraged,Icouldwithtransporthavepressedhertomine.

IfImustnottouchyou,Iwillnot.--Butdependuponit,[andIassumedthesternestairIcouldassume,totrywhatitwoulddo,]dependuponit,Madam,thatthisisnotthewaytoavoidtheevilsyoudread.LetmedowhatIwill,Icannotbeusedworse--Dorcas,begone!

Shearose,Dorcasbeingabouttowithdraw;andwildlycaughtholdofherarm:ODorcas!Ifthouartofmineownsex,leavemenot,Ichargethee!--ThenquittingDorcas,downshethrewherselfuponherknees,inthefurthermostcorneroftheroom,claspingachairwithherfacelaiduponthebottomofit!--OwherecanIbesafe?--Where,wherecanIbesafe,fromthismanofviolence?--

ThisgaveDorcasanopportunitytoconfirmherselfinherlady'sconfidence:thewenchthrewherselfatmyfeet,whileIseemedinviolentwrath;andembracingmyknees,Killme,Sir,killme,Sir,ifyouplease!--Imustthrowmyselfinyourway,tosavemylady.Ibegyourpardon,Sir--butyoumustbeseton!--Godforgivethemischief-makers!--Butyourownheart,iflefttoitself,wouldnotpermitthesethings--spare,however,Sir!sparemylady,Ibeseechyou!--bustlingonherkneesaboutme,asifIwereintendingtoapproachherlady,hadInotbeenrestrainedbyher.

This,humouredbyme,Begone,devil!--Officiousdevil,begone!--startledthedearcreature:who,snatchinguphastilyherheadfromthechair,andashastilypoppingitdownagaininterror,hithernose,Isuppose,

againsttheedgeofthechair;anditgushedoutwithblood,runninginastreamdownherbosom;sheherselfwastoomuchfrightedtoheedit!

NeverwasmortalmaninsuchterrorandagitationasI;forIinstantlyconcluded,thatshehadstabbedherselfwithsomeconcealedinstrument.

Irantoherinawildagony--forDorcaswasfrightedoutofallhermockinterposition----

Whathaveyoudone!--Owhathaveyoudone!--Lookuptome,mydearest



life!--Sweetinjuredinnocence,lookuptome!Whathaveyoudone!--LongwillInotsurviveyou!--AndIwasuponthepointofdrawingmyswordtodispatchmyself,whenIdiscovered--[Whatanunmanlyblockheaddoesthischarmingcreaturemakemeatherpleasure!]thatallIapprehendedwasbutabloodynose,which,asfarasIknow(foritcouldnotbestoppedinaquarterofanhour)mayhavesavedherheadandherintellects.

ButIseebythisscene,thatthesweetcreatureisbutaprettycowardatbottom;andthatIcanterrifyheroutofhervirulenceagainstme,wheneverIputonsternnessandanger.Butthen,asaqualifiertotheadvantagethisgivesmeoverher,Ifindmyselftobeacowardtoo,whichIhadnotbeforesuspected,sinceIwascapableofbeingsoeasilyterrifiedbytheapprehensionsofherofferingviolencetoherself.

LETTERXXIII


Butwithallthisdearcreature'sresentmentagainstme,Icannot,formyheart,thinkbutshewillgetallover,andconsenttoenterthepalewithme.Weresheeventodieto-morrow,andtoknowsheshould,would

notawomanofhersense,ofherpunctilio,andinhersituation,andofsoproudafamily,ratherdiemarried,thanotherwise?--Nodoubtbutshewould;althoughsheweretohatethemaneversoheartily.Ifso,thereisnowbutonemanintheworldwhomshecanhave--andthatisme.

NowItalk[familiarwritingisbuttalking,Jack]thusgliblyofenteringthepale,thouwiltbereadytoquestionme,Iknow,astomyintentionsonthishead.

Asmuchofmyheart,asIknowofitmyself,willItellthee.--WhenIamfromher,Icannotstillhelphesitatingaboutmarriage;andIevenfrequentlyresolveagainstit,anddeterminetopressmyfavouriteschemeforcohabitation.ButwhenIamwithher,Iamreadytosay,toswear,

andtodo,whateverIthinkwillbethemostacceptabletoher,andwereaparsonathand,Ishouldplungeatonce,nodoubtofit,intothestate.

Ihavefrequentlythought,incommoncases,thatitishappyformanygiddyfellows[therearegiddyfellows,aswellasgiddygirls,Jack;andperhapsthoseareasoftendrawnin,asthese]thatceremonyandparadearenecessarytotheirrevocablesolemnity;andthatthereisgenerallytimeforamantorecollecthimselfinthespacebetweentheheatedover-night,andthecoolernextmorning;orIknownotwhocouldescapethesweetgypsies,whosefascinatingpowersaresomuchaidedbyourownraisedimaginations.

Awifeatanytime,Iusedtosay.IhadeverconfidenceandvanityenoughtothinkthatnowomanbreathingcoulddenyherhandwhenIheldoutmine.Iamconfoundedlymortifiedtofindthatthisladyisabletoholdmeatbay,andtorefuseallmyhonestvows.

Whatforce[allowmeaseriousreflection,Jack:itwillbeputdown!Whatforce]haveevilhabitsuponthehumanmind!Whenweenteruponadeviouscourse,wethinkweshallhaveitinourpowerwhenwewillreturntotherightpath.Butitisnotso,Iplainlysee:For,whocanacknowledgewithmorejusticethisdearcreature'smerits,andhisown



errors,thanI?Whoseregret,attimes,canbedeeperthanmine,fortheinjuriesIhavedoneher?Whoseresolutionstorepairthoseinjuriesstronger?--Yethowtransitoryismypenitence!--HowamIhurriedaway--Canstthoutellbywhat?--Odevilofyouth,anddevilofintrigue,howdoyoumisleadme!--Howoftendoweendinoccasionsforthedeepestremorse,whatwebegininwantonness!--

Atthepresentwriting,however,theturnofthescaleisinbehalfofmatrimony--forIdespairofcarryingwithhermyfavouritepoint.

TheladytellsDorcas,thatherheartisbroken:andthatsheshalllivebutalittlewhile.Ithinknothingofthat,ifwemarry.Inthefirstplace,sheknowsnotwhatamindunapprehensivewilldoforher,inastatetowhichallthesexlookforwardswithhighsatisfaction.Howoftenhavethewholeofthesacredconclavebeenthusdeceivedintheirchoiceofapope;notconsideringthatthenewdignityisofitselfsufficienttogivenewlife!Afewmonths'heart'seasewillgivemycharmeraquitedifferentnotionofthings:andIdaresay,asIhaveheretoforesaid,*oncemarried,andIammarriedforlife.

*SeeLetterIX.ofthisvolume.

Iwillallowthatherpride,inonesense,hassufferedabasement:buthertriumphisthegreaterineveryother.AndwhileIcanthinkthatallhertrialsarebutadditionstoherhonour,andthatIhavelaidthefoundationsofhergloryinmyownshame,canIbecalledcruel,ifIamnotaffectedwithhergriefassomemenwouldbe?

Andforwhatshouldherheartbebroken?Herwillisunviolated;--atpresent,however,herwillisunviolated.Thedestroyingofgoodhabits,andtheintroducingofbad,tothecorruptingofthewholeheart,istheviolation.Thatherwillisnottobecorrupted,thathermindisnottobedebased,shehashithertounquestionablyproved.Andifshegivecauseforfarthertrials,andholdfastherintegrity,whatideaswillshehavetodwellupon,thatwillbeabletocorrupthermorals?What

vestigia,whatremembrances,butsuchaswillinspireabhorrenceoftheattempter?

Whatnonsensethentosupposethatsuchamerenotionalviolationasshehassufferedshouldbeabletocutasunderthestringsoflife?

Herreligion,married,ornotmarried,willsetherabovemakingsuchatriflingaccident,suchaninvoluntarysufferingfataltoher.

Suchconsiderationsasthesetheyarethatsupportmeagainstallapprehensionsofbugbearconsequences;andIwouldhavethemhaveweightwiththee;whoaresuchadoughtyadvocateforher.AndyetIallowtheethis;thatshereallymakestoomuchofit;takesittoomuchtoheart.

Tobesuresheoughttohaveforgotitbythistime,exceptthecharming,charmingconsequencehappen,thatstillIaminhopeswillhappen,wereItoproceednofarther.And,ifsheapprehendedthisherself,thenhasthedearover-nicesoulsomereasonfortakingitsomuchtoheart;andyetwouldnot,Ithink,refusetolegitimate.

OJack!hadIamimperialdiadem,Isweartothee,thatIwouldgiveitup,eventomyenemy,tohaveonecharmingboybythislady.Andshouldsheescapeme,andnosucheffectfollow,myrevengeonherfamily,and,insuchacase,onherself,wouldbeincomplete,andIshouldreproach



myselfaslongasIlived.

WereItobesurethatthisfoundationislaid[AndwhymayInothopeitis?]Ishouldnotdoubttohaveherstill(shouldshewithstandherdayofgrace)onmyownconditions;norshouldI,ifitwereso,questionthatrevivedaffectioninher,whichawomanseldomfailstohaveforthefatherofherfirstchild,whetherborninwedlock,oroutofit.

Andpr'ythee,Jack,seeinthismyardenthope,adistinctioninmyfavourfromotherrakes;who,almosttoaman,followtheirinclinationswithouttroublingthemselvesaboutconsequences.Inimitation,asonewouldthink,ofthestruttingvillainofabird,whichfromfeatheredladytofeatheredladypursueshisimperialpleasures,leavingittohissleekparamourstohatchthegenialproductinholesandcornersoftheirownfindingout.

LETTERXXIV

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.TUESDAYMORN.JUNE20.

Well,Jack,nowareweuponanotherfootingtogether.Thisdearcreaturewillnotletmebegood.Sheisnowauthorizingallmyplotsbyherownexample.

Thoumustbepartialinthehighestdegree,ifnowthoublamestmeforresumingmyformerschemes,sinceinthatcaseIshallbutfollowhercue.NoforcedconstructionofheractionsdoImakeonthisoccasion,inordertojustifyabadcauseoraworseintention.Aslightpretence,indeed,servedthewolfwhenhehadamindtoquarrelwiththelamb;butthisisnotnowmycase.

Forhere(wouldstthouhavethoughtit?)takingadvantageofDorcas'scompassionatetemper,andofsomewarmexpressionswhichthe

tender-heartedwenchletfallagainstthecrueltyofmen,andwishingtohaveitinherpowertoserveher,hasshegivenherthefollowingnote,signedbyhermaidenname:forshehasthoughtfit,inpositiveandplainwords,toowntothepityingDorcasthatsheisnotmarried.

MONDAY,JUNE19.

Ithenunderwrittendoherebypromise,that,onmycomingintopossessionofmyownestate,IwillprovideforDorcasMartindaleinagentlewoman-likemanner,inmyownhouse:or,ifIdonotsoonobtainthatpossession,orshouldfirstdie,Idoherebybindmyself,myexecutors,andadministrators,topaytoher,orherorder,duringthetermofher

naturallife,thesumoffivepoundsoneachofthefourusualquarterlydaysintheyear;onconditionthatshefaithfullyassistmeinmyescapefromanillegalconfinementunderwhichInowlabour.Thefirstquarterlypaymenttocommenceandbepayableattheendofthreemonthsimmediatelyfollowingthedayofmydeliverance.AndIdoalsopromisetogiveher,asatestimonyofmyhonourintherest,adiamondring,whichIhaveshowedher.WitnessmyhandthisnineteenthdayofJune,intheyearabovewritten.

CLARISSAHARLOWE.



Now,Jack,whattermswouldstthouhavemetokeepwithsuchasweetcorruptress?Seestthounothowshehatesme?Seestthounotthatsheisresolvednevertoforgiveme?Seestthounot,however,thatshemustdisgraceherselfintheeyeoftheworld,ifsheactuallyshouldescape?Thatshemustbesubjectedtoinfinitedistressandhazard!Forwhomhasshetoreceiveandprotecther?Yettodeterminetorisquealltheseevils!andfurthermoretostooptoartifice,tobeguiltyofthereigningviceofthetimes,ofbriberyandcorruption!OJack,Jack!saynot,writenotanotherwordinherfavour!

Thouhastblamedmeforbringinghertothishouse:buthadIcarriedhertoanyotherinEngland,wheretherewouldhavebeenoneservantorinmatecapableeitherofcompassionorcorruption,whatmusthavebeentheconsequence?

Butseestthounot,however,thatinthisflimsycontrivance,thedearimplacable,likeadrowningman,catchesatastrawtosaveherself!--Astrawshallshefindtobetherefugeshehasresortedto.

LETTERXXV

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.TUES.MORN.TENO'CLOCK

Veryill--exceedinglyill--asDorcastellsme,inordertoavoidseeingme--andyetthedearsoulmaybesoinhermind.Butisnotthatequivocation?Someonepassionpredominatingineveryhumanbreast,breaksthroughprinciple,andcontroulsusall.Mineisloveandrevengetakingturns.Her'sishatred.--Butthisismyconsolation,thathatredappeasedislovebegun;orloverenewed,Imayrathersay,ifloveeverhadfootinghere.

Butreflectioningapart,thouseest,Jack,thatherplotisbeginningtowork.To-morrowistobreakout.

Ihavebeenabroad,tosetonfootaplotofcircumvention.Allfairnow,Belford!

Iinsisteduponvisitingmyindisposedfair-one.Dorcasmadeofficiousexcusesforher.Icursedthewenchinherhearingforherimpertinence;andstampedandmadeaclutter;whichwasimprovedintoanapprehensiontotheladythatIwouldhaveflungherfaithfulconfidantefromthetopofthestairstothebottom.

Heisaviolentwretch!--But,Dorcas,[dearDorcas,nowitis,]thou

shalthaveafriendinmetothelastdayofmylife.

Andwhatnow,Jack,dostthinkthenameofhergoodangelis!--WhyDorcasMartindale,christianandsuper(nomoreWykes)asinthepromissorynoteinmyformer--andthedearcreaturehasboundhertoherbythemostsolemnobligations,besidesthetieofinterest.

Whither,Madam,doyoudesigntogowhenyougetoutofthishouse?

IwillthrowmyselfintothefirstopenhouseIcanfind;andbeg



protectiontillIcangetacoach,oralodginginsomehonestfamily.

Whatwillyoudoforclothes,Madam?Idoubtyou'llbeabletotakeanyawaywithyou,butwhatyou'llhaveon.

O,nomatterforclothes,ifIcanbutgetoutofthishouse.

Whatwillyoudoformoney,Madam?Ihaveheardhishonourexpresshisconcern,thathecouldnotprevailuponyoutobeobligedtohim,thoughheapprehendedthatyoumustbeshortofmoney.

O,Ihaveringsandothervaluables.IndeedIhavebutfourguineas,andtwoofthemIfoundlatelywraptupinabitoflace,designedforacharitableuse.Butnow,alas!charitybeginsathome!--ButIhaveonedearfriendleft,ifshebeliving,asIhopeinGodsheis!towhomIcanbeobliged,ifIwant.ODorcas!Imusterenowhaveheardfromher,ifIhadhadfairplay.

Well,Madam,your'sisahardlot.Ipityyouatmyheart!

Thankyou,Dorcas!--Iamunhappy,thatIdidnotthinkbefore,thatImighthaveconfidedinthypity,andinthysex!

Ipitiedyou,Madam,oftenandoften:butyouwerealways,asIthought,

diffidentofme.AndthenIdoubtednotbutyouweremarried;andIthoughthishonourwasunkindlyusedbyyou.SothatIthoughtitmydutytowishwelltohishonour,ratherthantowhatIthoughttobeyourhumours,Madam.WouldtoHeaventhatIhadknownbeforethatyouwerenotmarried!--Suchalady!suchafortune!tobesosadlybetrayed;----

Ah,Dorcas!Iwasbaselydrawnin!Myyouth--myignoranceoftheworld--andIhavesomethingstoreproachmyselfwithwhenIlookback.

Lord,Madam,whatdeceitfulcreaturesarethesemen!--Neitheroaths,norvows--Iamsure!Iamsure![andthenwithherapronshegavehereyeshalfadozenheartyrubs]ImaycursethetimethatIcameintothishouse!

Herewasaccountingforherboldeyes!AndwasitnotbetterforDorcastogiveupahousewhichherladycouldnotthinkworseofthanshedid,inordertogainthereputationofsincerity,thanbyofferingtovindicateit,tomakeherprofferedservicessuspected.

PoorDorcas!--Blessme!howlittledowe,whohavelivedallourtimeinthecountry,knowofthiswickedtown!

HadIbeenabletowrite,criedtheveteranwench,IshouldcertainlyhavegivensomeothernearrelationsIhaveinWalesalittleinklingofmatters;andtheywouldhavesavedmefrom----from----from----

Hersobswereenough.Theapprehensionsofwomenonsuchsubjectsareeveraforehandwithspeech.

Andthen,sobbingon,sheliftedheraprontoherfaceagain.Sheshowedmehow.

PoorDorcas!--Againwipingherowncharmingeyes.

Alllove,allcompassion,isthisdearcreaturetoeveryoneinafflictionbutme.



Andwouldnotanauntprotectherkinswoman?--Abominablewretch!

Ican't--Ican't--Ican't--say,myauntwasprivytoit.Shegavemegoodadvice.SheknewnotforagreatwhilethatIwas--thatIwas--thatIwas--ugh!--ugh!--ugh!--

Nomore,nomore,goodDorcas--Whataworlddowelivein!--WhatahouseamIin!--Butcome,don'tweep,(thoughsheherselfcouldnotforbear:)mybeingbetrayedintoit,thoughtomyownruin,maybeahappyeventforthee:and,ifIlive,itshall.

Ithankyou,mygoodlady,blubbering.Iamsorry,verysorry,youhavehadsohardalot.Butitmaybethesavingofmysoul,ifIcangettoyourladyship'shouse.HadIbutknownthatyourladyshipwasnotmarried,Iwouldhaveeatmyownflesh,before----before----before----

Dorcassobbedandwept.Theladysighedandweptalso.

Butnow,Jack,foraseriousreflectionuponthepremises.

Howwillthegoodfolksaccountforit,thatSatanhassuchfaithfulinstruments,andthatthebondofwickednessisastrongerbondthanthetiesofvirtue;asifitwerethenatureofthehumanmindtobevillanous?

Forhere,hadDorcasbeengood,andbeentemptedasshewastemptedtoanythingevil,Imakenodoubtbutshewouldhaveyieldedtothetemptation.

Andcannotourfraternityinanhundredinstancesgiveproofofthelikepredominanceofviceovervirtue?Andthatwehaveriskedmoretoserveandpromotetheinterestsoftheformer,thaneveragoodmandidtoserveagoodmanoragoodcause?Forhavewenotbeenprodigaloflifeandfortune?havewenotdefiedthecivilmagistrateuponoccasion?andhavewenotattemptedrescues,anddaredallthings,onlytoextricateapoundedprofligate?

Whence,Jack,canthisbe?

O!Ihaveit,Ibelieve.Theviciousareasbadastheycanbe;anddotheDevil'sworkwithoutlookingafter;whileheiscontinuallyspreadingsnaresfortheothers;and,likeaskilfulangler,suitinghisbaitstothefishheanglesfor.

Norletevenhonestpeople,socalled,blamepoorDorcasforherfidelityinabadcause.Fordoesnotthegeneral,whoimplicitlyservesanambitiousprinceinhisunjustdesignsuponhisneighbours,oruponhisownoppressedsubjects;andeventhelawyer,who,forthesakeofapaltryfee,undertakestowhitenablackcause,andtodefenditagainstoneheknowstobegood,dotheverysamethingasDorcas?Andaretheynotbotheverywhitasculpable?Yettheoneshallbedubbedahero,theothercalledanadmirablefellow,andbecontendedforbyeveryclient,

andhisdouble-tonguedabilitiesshallcarryhimthroughallthehighprefermentsofthelawwithreputationandapplause.

Well,butwhatshallbedone,sincetheladyissomuchdeterminedonremoving!--Istherenowaytoobligeher,andyettomaketheveryactsubservienttomyotherviews?Ifancysuchawaymaybefoundout.

Iwillstudyforit----

SupposeIsufferhertomakeanescape?Herheartisinit.Ifshe



effectit,thetriumphshewillhaveovermeuponitwillbeacounterbalanceforallshehassuffered.

IwillobligeherifIcan.

LETTERXXVI


Tiredwithasuccessionoffatiguingdaysandsleeplessnights,andwithcontemplatingtheprecarioussituationIstandinwithmybeloved,Ifellintoaprofoundreverie;whichbroughtonsleep;andthatproducedadream;afortunatedream;which,asIimagine,willaffordmyworkingmindthemeanstoeffecttheobligingdoublepurposemyheartisnowoncemoresetupon.

What,asIhaveoftencontemplated,istheenjoymentofthefinestwomanintheworld,tothecontrivance,thebustle,thesurprises,andatlastthehappyconclusionofawell-laidplot!--Thecharminground-abouts,tocometothenearestwayhome;--thedoubts;theapprehensions;theheart-achings;themeditatedtriumphs--thesearethejoysthatmakethe

blessingdear.--Foralltherest,whatisit?--Whatbuttofindanangelinimaginationdwindleddowntoawomaninfact?----Buttomydream----

MethoughtitwasaboutnineonWednesdaymorningthatachariot,withadowager'sarmsuponthedoors,andinitagravematronlylady[notunlikemotherH.intheface;but,inherheart,Oh!howunlike!]stoppedatagrocer'sshop,abouttendoorsontheothersideoftheway,inordertobuysomegroceries:andmethoughtDorcas,havingbeenouttoseeifthecoastwereclearforherlady'sflight,andifacoachweretobegotneartheplace,espiedthechariotwiththedowager'sarms,andthismatronlylady:andwhat,methought,didDorcas,thatsubtletraitress,do,butwhipuptotheoldmatronlylady,andliftinguphervoice,say,GoodmyLady,permitmeonewordwithyourLadyship!

Whatthouhasttosaytome,sayon,quoththeoldlady;thegrocerretiring,andstandingaloof,togiveDorcasleavetospeak;who,methought,inwordsliketheseaccostedthelady:

'Youseem,Madam,tobeaverygoodlady;andhere,inthisneighbourhood,atahouseofnohighrepute,isaninnocentladyofrankandfortune,beautifulasaMaymorning,andyouthfulasarose-bud,andfullassweetandlovely,whohasbeentrickedthitherbyawickedgentleman,practisedinthewaysofthetown,andthisverynightwillsheberuinedifshegetnotoutofhishands.Now,OLady!ifyouwillextendyourcompassionategoodnesstothisfairyounglady,inwhom,themomentyoubeholdher,youwillseecausetobelieveallIsay,andlet

herbuthaveaplaceinyourchariot,andremaininyourprotectionforonedayonly,tillshecansendamanandhorsetoherrichandpowerfulfriends,youmaysavefromruinaladywhohasnoequalforvirtueaswellasbeauty.'

Methoughttheoldlady,movedwithDorcas'sstory,answeredandsaid,'Hasten,Odamsel,whoinahappymomentartcometoputitinmypowertoservetheinnocentandvirtuous,whichithasalwaysbeenmydelighttodo:hastentothisyounglady,andbidherhiehithertomewithallspeed;andtellher,thatmychariotshallbeherasylum:andifIfind



allthatthousayesttrue,myhouseshallbehersanctuary,andIwillprotectherfromallheroppressors.'

Hereupon,methought,thistraitressDorcashiedbacktothelady,andmadereportofwhatshehaddone.And,methought,theladyhighlyapprovedofDorcas'sproceedingandblessedherforhergoodthought.

AndIliftedupmineeyes,andbeholdtheladyissuedoutofthehouse,andwithoutlookingback,rantothechariotwiththedowager'scoatuponit;andwasreceivedbythematronlyladywithopenarms,and'Welcome,welcome,welcome,fairyounglady,whosowellanswerthedescriptionofthefaithfuldamsel:andIwillcarryyouinstantlytomyhouse,whereyoushallmeetwithallthegoodusageyourheartcanwishfor,tillyoucanapprizeyourrichandpowerfulfriendsofyourpastdangers,andpresentescape.'

'Thankyou,thankyou,thankyou,thankyou,worthy,thriceworthylady,whoaffordsokindlyyourprotectiontoamostunhappyyoungcreature,whohasbeenbaselyseducedandbetrayed,andbroughttotheverybrinkofdestruction.'

Methought,then,thematronlylady,whohad,bythetimetheyoungladycametoher,boughtandpaidforthegoodsshewanted,orderedhercoachmantodrivehomewithallspeed;whostoppednottillhehad

arrivedinacertainstreetnotfarfromLincoln's-inn-fields,wherethematronlyladylivedinasumptuousdwelling,repletewithdamselswhowroughtcuriouslyinmuslins,cambrics,andfinelinen,andineverygoodworkthatindustriousdamselslovetobeemployedabout,excepttheloomandthespinning-wheel.

And,methought,allthewaytheyoungladyandtheoldladyrode,andaftertheycamein,tilldinnerwasready,theyoungladyfilledupthetimewiththedismalaccountofherwrongsandhersufferings,thelikeofwhichwasneverheardbymortalear;andthisinsomovingamanner,thatthegoodoldladydidnothingbutweep,andsigh,andsob,andinveighagainsttheartsofwickedmen,andagainstthatabominable'SquireLovelace,whowasaplottingvillain,methoughtshesaid;and

morethanthat,anunchainedBeelzebub.

MethoughtIwasinadreadfulagony,whenIfoundtheladyhadescaped,andinmywrathhadliketohaveslainDorcas,andourmother,andeveryoneImet.But,bysomequicktransition,andstrangemetamorphosis,whichdreamsdonotusuallyaccountfor,methought,allofasudden,thismatronlyladyturnedintothefamousmotherH.herself;and,beinganoldacquaintanceofmotherSinclair,wasprevailedupontoassistinmyplotupontheyounglady.

Then,methought,followedastrangescene;formotherH.longingtohearmoreoftheyounglady'sstory,andnightbeingcome,besoughthertoacceptofaplaceinherownbed,inordertohaveallthetalkto

themselves.For,methought,twoyoungniecesofher'shadbrokeninuponthem,inthemiddleofthedismaltale.

Accordingly,goingearlytobed,andthesadstorybeingresumed,withasgreatearnestnessononesideasattentionontheother,beforetheyoungladyhadgonefarinit,motherH.methoughtwastakenwithafitofthecolic;andhertorturesincreasing,wasobligedtorisetogetacordialsheusedtofindspecificinthisdisorder,towhichshewasunhappilysubject.



Havingthusrisen,andstepttohercloset,methoughtsheletfallthewaxtaperinherreturn;andthen[Ometamorphosisstillstrangerthantheformer!whatunaccountablethingsaredreams!]comingtobedagaininthedark,theyounglady,toherinfiniteastonishment,grief,andsurprise,foundmotherH.turnedintoayoungpersonoftheothersex;andalthoughLovelacewastheabhorredofhersoul,yet,fearingitwassomeotherperson,itwasmatterofconsolationtoher,whenshefounditwasnootherthanhimself,andthatshehadbeenstillthebed-fellowofbutoneandthesameman.

Astrangepromiscuoushuddleofadventuresfollowed,scenesperpetuallyshifting;nownothingheardfromthelady,butsighs,groans,exclamations,faintings,dyings--Fromthegentleman,butvows,promises,protestations,disclaimersofpurposespursued,andallthegentleandungentlepressuresofthelover'swarfare.

Then,asquickasthought(fordreams,thouknowestconfinenotthemselvestotherulesofthedrama)ensuedrecoveries,lyings-in,christenings,thesmilingboy,amply,eveninherownopinion,rewardingthesufferingmother.

Thenthegrandfather'sestateyieldedup,possessiontakenofit:livingveryhappilyuponit:herbelovedNortonhercompanion;MissHowehervisiter;and(admirable!thriceadmirable!)enabledtocomparenoteswith

her;acharminggirl,bythesamefather,toherfriend'scharmingboy;who,astheygrowup,inordertoconsolidatetheirmamma'sfriendships,(forneitherhavedreamsregardtoconsanguinity,)intermarry;changenamesbyactofparliament,toenjoymyestate--andIknownotwhatofthelikeincongruousstuff.

Iawoke,asthoumayestbelieve,ingreatdisorder,andrejoicedtofindmycharmerinthenextroom,andDorcashonest.

Nowthouwiltsaythiswasaveryodddream.Andyet,(forIamastrangedreamer,)itisnotaltogetherimprobablethatsomethinglikeitmayhappen;astheprettysimpletonhastheweaknesstoconfideinDorcas,whomtillnowshedisliked.

ButIforgottotelltheeonepartofmydream;andthatwas,that,thenextmorning,theladygavewaytosuchtransportsofgriefandresentment,thatshewaswithdifficultydivertedfrommakinganattemptuponherownlife.But,however,atlastwasprevailedupontoresolvetolive,andmakethebestofthematter:aletter,methought,fromCaptainTomlinsonhelpingtopacifyher,writtentoapprizeme,thatheruncleHarlowewouldcertainlybeatKentish-townonWednesdaynight,June28,thefollowingday(the29th)beinghisbirth-day;andbedoublydesirous,onthataccount,thatournuptialsshouldbethenprivatelysolemnizedinhispresence.

ButisThursday,the29th,heruncle'sanniversary,methinksthouaskest?

--Itis;orelsethedayofcelebrationshouldhavebeenearlierstill.ThreeweeksagoIheardhersayitwas:andIhavedownthebirthdayofeveryoneinthefamily,andthewedding-dayofherfatherandmother.Theminutestcircumstancesareoftenofgreatserviceinmattersofthelastimportance.

Andwhatsayestthounowtomydream?

Whosaysthat,sleepingandwaking,Ihavenotfinehelpsfromsomebody,somespiritrather,asthou'ltbeapttosay?Butnowonderthata



Beelzebubhashisdevilkinstoattendhiscall.

IcanhavenomannerofdoubtofsucceedinginmotherH.'spartofthescheme;forwillthelady(whoresolvestothrowherselfintothefirsthouseshecanenter,ortobespeaktheprotectionofthefirstpersonshemeets,andwhothinkstherecanbenodangeroutofthishouse,equaltowhatsheapprehendsfrommeinit)scrupletoacceptofthechariotofadowager,accidentallyoffered?andthelady'sprotectionengagedbyherfaithfulDorcas,sohighlybribedtopromoteherescape?--AndthenMrs.H.hastheairandappearanceofavenerablematron,andisnotsuchaforbiddingdevilasMrs.Sinclair.

Theprettysimpletonknowsnothingintheworld;northatpeoplewhohavemoneyneverwantassistantsintheirviews,betheywhattheywill.Howelsecouldtheprincesoftheearthbesoimplicitlyservedastheyare,changetheyhandseverysooften,andbetheirpurposeseversowicked.

IfIcanbutgethertogoonwithmetillWednesdaynextweek,weshallbesettledtogetherprettyquietlybythattime.Andindeedifshehasanygratitude,andhasinhertheleastofhersex'sfoibles,shemustthinkIdeserveherfavour,bythepainsshehascostme.Fordearlydotheyalllovethatmenshouldtakepainsaboutthemandforthem.

Andhere,forthepresent,Iwilllaydownmypen,andcongratulate

myselfuponmyhappyinvention(sinceherobstinacyputsmeoncemoreuponexercisingit.)--Butwiththisresolution,Ithink,that,ifthepresentcontrivancefailme,Iwillexertallthefacultiesofmymind,allmytalents,toprocureformyselfaregalrighttoherfavourandthatindefianceofallmyantipathiestothemarriedstate;andofthesuggestionsofthegreatdeviloutofthehouse,andofhissecretagentsinit.--Since,ifnowsheisnottobeprevailedupon,ordrawnin,itwillbeinvaintoattemptherfurther.

LETTERXXVII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.TUESDAYNIGHT,JUNE20.

Noadmittanceyettomycharmer!sheisveryill--inaviolentfever,Dorcasthinks.Yetwillhavenoadvice.

DorcastellsherhowmuchIamconcernedatit.

Butagainletmeask,Doesthisladydorighttomakeherselfill,whensheisnotill?Formyownpart,libertineaspeoplethinkme,whenIhadoccasiontobesick,Itookadoseofipecacuanha,thatImightnotbeguiltyofafalsehood;andmostheartilysickwasI;asshe,who

thenpitiedme,fullwellknew.Butheretopretendtobeveryill,onlytogetanopportunitytorunaway,inordertoavoidforgivingamanwhohasoffendedher,howunchristian!--Ifgoodfolksallowthemselvesinthesebreachesofaknownduty,andinthesepresumptuouscontrivancestodeceive,who,Belford,shallblameus?

Ihaveastrangenotionthatthematronlyladywillbecertainlyatthegrocer'sshopatthehourofninetomorrowmorning:forDorcasheardmetellMrs.Sinclair,thatIshouldgooutateightprecisely;andthensheistotryforacoach:andifthedowager'schariotshouldhappen



tobethere,howluckywillitbeformycharmer!howstrangelywillmydreambemadeout!

***

IhavejustreceivedaletterfromCaptainTomlinson.Isitnotwonderful?forthatwaspartofmydream.

Ishallalwayshaveaprodigiousregardtodreamshenceforward.IknownotbutImaywriteabookuponthatsubject;formyownexperiencewillfurnishoutagreatpartofit.'GlanvilleofWitches,''Baxter'sHistoryofSpiritsandApparitions,'andthe'RoyalPedant'sDemonology,'willbenothingatalltoLovelace'sReveries.

TheletterisjustwhatIdreamedittobe.IamonlyconcernedthatuncleJohn'sanniversarydidnothappenthreeorfourdayssooner;forshouldanynewmisfortunebefalmycharmer,shemaynotbeabletosupportherspiritssolongastillThursdayinthenextweek.Yetitwillgivemethemoretimefornewexpedients,shouldmypresentcontrivancefail;whichIcannothoweversuppose.

TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.MONDAY,JUNE19.

DearSir,

Icannowreturnyourjoy,forthejoyyouhavegivenme,aswellasmydearfriendMr.Harlowe,inthenewsofhisbelovedniece'shappyrecovery;forheisdeterminedtocomplywithherwishesandyour's,andtogivehertoyouwithhisownhand.

Astheceremonyhasbeennecessarilydelayedbyreasonofherillness,andasMr.Harlowe'sbirth-dayisonThursdaythe29thofthisinstantJune,whenheentersintotheseventy-fourthyearofhisage;andas

timemaybewantedtocompletethedearlady'srecovery;heisverydesirousthatthemarriageshallbesolemnizeduponit;thathemayafterwardshavedoublejoyonthatdaytotheendofhislife.

Forthispurposeheintendstosetoutprivately,soastobeatKentish-townonWednesdayse'nnightintheevening.

Allthefamilyused,hesays,tomeettocelebrateitwithhim;butastheyareatpresentintoounhappyasituationforthat,hewillgiveout,that,notbeingabletobearthedayathome,hehasresolvedtobeabsentfortwoorthreedays.

Hewillsetoutonhorseback,attendedonlywithonetrustyservant,

forthegreaterprivacy.Hewillbeatthemostcreditable-lookingpublichousethere,expectingyoubothnextmorning,ifhehearnothingfrommetopreventhim.Andhewillgototownwithyouaftertheceremonyisperformed,inthecoachhesupposesyouwillcomein.

HeisverydesirousthatIshouldbepresentontheoccasion.ButthisIhavepromisedhim,athisrequest,thatIwillbeupbeforetheday,inordertoseethesettlementsexecuted,andeverythingproperlyprepared.



Heisverygladyouhavethelicenseready.

Hespeaksverykindlyofyou,Mr.Lovelace;andsays,that,ifanyofthefamilystandoutafterhehasseentheceremonyperformed,hewillseparatefromthem,andunitehimselftohisdearnieceandherinterests.

Iownedtoyou,whenintownlast,thatItookslightnoticetomydearfriendofthemisunderstandingbetweenyouandhisniece;andthatIdidthis,forfeartheladyshouldhaveshownanylittlediscontentinhispresence,hadIbeenabletoprevailuponhimtogoupinperson,asthenwasdoubtful.ButIhopenothingofthatdiscontentremainsnow.

Myabsence,whenyourmessengercame,mustexcusemefornotwritingbyhim.

Bepleasedtomakemymostrespectfulcomplimentsacceptabletotheadmirablelady,andbelievemetobe

Yourmostfaithfulandobedientservant,ANTONYTOMLINSON.

***

ThisletterIsealed,andbrokeopen.Itwasbrought,thoumayestsuppose,byaparticularmessenger;thesealsuchaoneasthewriterneedbeashamedof.ItookcaretoinquireaftertheCaptain'shealth,inmybeloved'shearing;anditisnowreadytobeproducedasapacifier,accordingassheshalltakeonorresent,ifthetwometamorphoseshappenpursuanttomywonderfuldream;as,havinggreatfaithindreams,Idaresaytheywill.--Ithinkitwillnotbeamiss,inchangingmyclothes,tohavethisletteroftheworthyCaptainlieinmybeloved'sway.

LETTERXXVIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.WEDN.NOON,JUNE21.

WhatshallIsaynow!--I,whobutafewhoursagohadsuchfaithindreams,andhadproposedoutofhandtobeginmytreatiseofdreamssleepinganddreamswaking,andwaspleasingmyselfwiththedialoguesbetweentheoldmatronalladyandtheyounglady,andwiththemetamorphoses,(absolutelyassuredthateverythingwouldhappenasmy

dreamchalkeditout,)shallnevermoredependuponthoseflyingfollies,thoseillusionsofafancydepraved,andrunmad.

Thusconfoundedlyhavemattershappened.

Iwentoutateighto'clockinhighgoodhumourwithmyself,inordertogivethesought-foropportunitytotheplottingmistressandcorruptedmaid;onlyorderingWill.tokeepagoodlook-outforfearhisladyshouldmistrustmyplot,ormistakeahackney-coachforthedowager-lady'schariot.ButfirstIsenttoknowhowshedid;and



receivingforanswer,Veryill:hadaverybadnight:whichlatterwasbuttooprobable;sincethisIknow,thatpeoplewhohaveplotsintheirheadsasseldomhaveasdeservegoodones.

Idesiredaphysicianmightbecalledin;butwasrefused.

ItookawalkinSt.James'sPark,congratulatingmyselfallthewayonmyrareinventions:then,impatient,Itookcoach,withoneofthewindowsquiteup,theotheralmostup,playingatbo-peepineverychariotIsawpassinmywaytoLincoln's-inn-fields:andwhenarrivedthereIsentthecoachmantodesireanyoneofMotherH.'sfamilytocometometothecoach-side,notdoubtingbutIshouldhaveintelligenceofmyfairfugitivethere;itbeingthenhalfanhourafterten.

Aservantcame,whogavemetounderstandthatthematronlyladywasjustreturnedbyherselfinthechariot.

Frightedoutofmywits,Ialighted,andheardfromthemother'sownmouth,thatDorcashadengagedhertoprotectthelady;butcametotellherafterwards,thatshehadchangedhermind,andwouldnotquitthehouse.

Quiteastonished,notknowingwhatmighthavehappened,Iorderedthe

coachmantolashawaytoourmother's.Arrivinghereinaninstant,thefirstwordIasked,was,Iftheladywassafe?

[Mr.LovelaceheregivesaverycircumstantialrelationofallthatpassedbetweentheLadyandDorcas.Butashecouldonlyguessathermotivesforrefusingtogooff,whenDorcastoldherthatshehadengagedforhertheprotectionofthedowager-lady,itisthoughtpropertoomitthisrelation,andtosupplyitbysomememorandaoftheLady's.Butitisfirstnecessarytoaccountfortheoccasiononwhichthosememorandaweremade.

Thereadermayremember,thatintheletterwrittentoMissHowe,onherescapetoHampstead,*shepromisestogivehertheparticularsofherflightatleisure.ShehadindeedthoughtsofcontinuingheraccountofeverythingthathadpassedbetweenherandMr.Lovelacesinceherlastnarrativeletter.Buttheuncertaintyshewasinfromthattime,withtheexecrabletreatmentshemetwithonherbeingdeludedbackagain,followedbyaweek'sdelirium,hadhithertohinderedherfromprosecutingherintention.But,nevertheless,havingitstillinherviewtoperformherpromiseassoonasshehadopportunity,shemademinutesofeverythingasitpassed,inordertohelphermemory:--'Which,'assheobservesinoneplace,'shecouldlesstrusttosinceherlatedisordersthanbefore.'Intheseminutes,orbookofmemoranda,sheobserves,'Thathaving

apprehensionsthatDorcasmightbeatraitress,shewouldhavegotawaywhileshewasgoneouttoseeforacoach;andactuallysliddownstairswiththatintent.Butthat,seeingMrs.Sinclairintheentry,(whomDorcashadplantedtherewhileshewentout,)shespeededupagainunseen.'

*SeeVol.V.LetterXXI.



Shethenwentuptothedining-room,andsawtheletterofCaptainTomlinson:onwhichsheobservesinhermemorandum-bookasfollows:]

'HowamIpuzzlednow!--Hemightleavethisletteronpurpose:noneoftheotherpapersleftwithitbeingofanyconsequence:Whatisthealternative?--Tostay,andbethewifeofthevilestofmen--howmyheartresiststhat!--Toattempttogetoff,andfail,ruininevitable!--Dorcasmaybetrayme!--Idoubtsheisstillhisimplement!--Athisgoingout,hewhisperedher,asIsaw,unobserved--inaveryfamiliarmannertoo--Neverfear,Sir,withacourtesy.

'Inheragreeingtoconniveatmyescape,sheprovidednotforherownsafety,ifIgotaway:yethadreason,inthatcase,toexpecthisvengeance.Andwantsnotforethought.--Tohavetakenherwithme,wastobeinthepowerofherintelligence,ifafaithlesscreature.--Letme,however,thoughIpartnotwithmycaution,keepmycharity!--Cantherebeanywomansoviletoawoman?--Oyes!--Mrs.Sinclair:heraunt.--TheLorddeliverme!--But,alas!--Ihaveputmyselfoutofthecourseofhisprotectionbythenaturalmeans--andamalreadyruined!Afather'scurselikewiseagainstme!Havingmadevainallmyfriends'cautionsandsolicitudes,Imustnothopeformiraclesinmyfavour!

'IfIdoescape,whatmaybecomeofme,apoor,helpless,desertedcreature!--Helplessfromsex!--fromcircumstances!--Exposedtoevery

danger!--Lordprotectme!'Hisvilemannotgonewithhim!--Lurkinghereabouts,nodoubt,towatchmysteps!--Iwillnotgoawaybythechariot,however.----

'Thatthechariotshouldcomesoopportunely!Solikehismanyopportunities!--ThatDorcasshouldhavethesuddenthought!--Shouldhavethecouragewiththethought,toaddressaladyinbehalfofanabsolutestrangertothatlady!Thattheladyshouldsoreadilyconsent!Yetthetransactionbetweenthemtotakeupsomuchtime,theirdistanceindegreeconsidered:for,arduousasthecasewas,andpreciousasthetime,Dorcaswasgoneabovehalfanhour!Yetthechariotwassaidtobereadyatagrocer'snotmanydoorsoff!

'Indeedsomeelderlyladiesaretalkative:andthereare,nodoubt,somegoodpeopleintheworld.----

'Butthatitshouldchancetobeawidowlady,whocoulddowhatshepleased!ThatDorcasshouldknowhertobesobythelozenge!Personsinherstationarenotusuallysoknowing,Ibelieve,inheraldry.

'Yetsomemay!forservantsarefondofderivingcollateralhonoursanddistinctions,asImaycallthem,fromthequality,orpeopleofrank,whomtheyserve.Butthisslyservantnotgonewithhim!ThenthisletterofTomlinson!----

'AlthoughIamresolvednevertohavethiswretch,yet,mayInotthrowmyselfintomyuncle'sprotectionatKentish-town,orHighgate,ifIcannotescapebefore:andsogetclearofhim?MaynottheevilIknowbelessthanwhatImayfallinto,ifIcanavoidfarthervillany?Farthervillanyhehasnotyetthreatened;freelyandjustlyasIhavetreatedhim!--Iwillnotgo,Ithink.Atleast,unlessIcansendthisfellowaway.*----

*Shetriedtodothis;butwaspreventedbythefellow'spretendingto



puthisankleout,byaslipdownstairs--Atrick,sayshiscontrivingmaster,inhisomittedrelation,Ihadtaughthim,onalikeoccasion,atAmiens.

'Thefellowavillain!Thewench,Idoubt,avilewench.Atlastconcernedforherownsafety.Playsoffandonaboutacoach.

'Allmyhopesofgettingoffatpresentover!--Unhappycreature!towhatfartherevilsartthoureserved!Oh!howmyheartrisesatthenecessityImuststillbeundertoseeandconversewithsoveryvileaman!'

LETTERXXIX

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.WEDNESDAYAFTERNOON.

Disappointedinhermeditatedescape;obliged,againstherwill,tomeetmeinthedining-room;andperhapsapprehensiveofbeingupbraidedforherartinfeigningherselfill;Iexpectedthatthedearperversewouldbeginwithmewithspiritandindignation.ButIwasinhopes,

fromthegentlenessofhernaturaldisposition;fromtheconsiderationwhichIexpectedfromheronhersituation;fromthecontentsoftheletterofCaptainTomlinson,whichDorcastoldmeshehadseen;andfromthetimeshehadhadtocoolandreflectsinceshelastadmittedmetoherpresence,thatshewouldnothavecarrieditsostronglythroughasshedid.

AsIenteredthedining-room,Icongratulatedherandmyselfuponhersuddenrecovery.Andwouldhavetakenherhand,withanairofrespectfultenderness;butshewasresolvedtobeginwheresheleftoff.

Sheturnedfromme,drawinginherhand,witharepulsingandindignant

aspect--Imeetyouoncemore,saidshe,becauseIcannothelpit.Whathaveyoutosaytome?WhyamItobethusdetainedagainstmywill?

Withtheutmostsolemnityofspeechandbehaviour,Iurgedtheceremony.IsawIhadnothingelseforit.IhadaletterinmypocketIsaid,[feelingforit,althoughIhadnottakenitfromthetablewhereIleftitinthesameroom,]thecontentsofwhich,ifattendedto,wouldmakeusbothhappy.Ihadbeenlothtoshowittoherbefore,becauseIhopedtoprevailuponhertobeminesoonerthanthedaymentionedinit.

Ifeltforitinallmypockets,watchinghereyemeantime,whichIsawglancetowardsthetablewhereitlay.

IwasuneasythatIcouldnotfindit--atlast,directedagainbyherslyeye,Ispieditonthetableatthefartherendoftheroom.

WithjoyIfetchedit.Bepleasedtoreadthatletter,Madam;withanairofsatisfiedassurance.

Shetookit,andcasthereyeoverit,insuchacarelessway,asmadeitevident,thatshehadreaditbefore:andthenunthankfullytosseditintothewindow-seatbeforeher.



Iurgedhertoblessmeto-morrow,orFridaymorning;atleast,thatshewouldnotrendervainheruncle'sjourney,andkindendeavourstobringaboutareconciliationamongusall.

Amongusall!repeatedshe,withanairequallydisdainfulandincredulous.OLovelace,thouartsurelynearlyalliedtothegranddeceiver,inthyendeavourtosuittemptationstoinclinations?--Butwhathonour,whatfaith,whatveracity,wereitpossiblethatIcouldenterintoparleywiththeeonthissubject,(whichitisnot,)mayIexpectfromsuchamanasthouhastshownthyselftobe?

Iwastouchedtothequick.Aladyofyourperfectcharacter,Madam,whohasfeignedherselfsick,onpurposetoavoidseeingthemanwhoadoredher,shouldnot--

Iknowwhatthouwouldstsay,interruptedshe--Twentyandtwentylowthings,thatmysoulwouldhavebeenabovebeingguiltyof,andwhichIhavedespisedmyselffor,haveIbeenbroughtintobytheinfectionofthycompany,andbythenecessitythouhadstlaidmeunder,ofappearingmean.But,IthankGod,destituteasIam,thatIamnot,however,sunksolow,astowishtobethine.

I,Madam,astheinjurer,oughttohavepatience.Itisfortheinjuredtoreproach.Butyouruncleisnotinaplotagainstyou,itistobe

hoped.Therearecircumstancesintheletteryoucastyoureyesover----Againsheinterruptedme,Why,oncemoreIaskyou,amIdetainedinthishouse?--DoInotseemyselfsurroundedbywretches,who,thoughtheywearthehabitofmysex,mayyet,asfarasIknow,lieinwaitformyperdition?

Shewouldbeveryloth,Isaid,thatMrs.Sinclairandherniecesshouldbecalleduptovindicatethemselvesandtheirhouse.

Wouldbuttheykillme,letthemcome,andwelcome,Iwillblessthehandthatwillstriketheblow!IndeedIwill.

'Tisidle,veryidle,totalkofdying.Mereyoung-ladytalk,whencontrouledbythosetheyhate.Butletmebeseechyou,dearestcreature----

Beseechmenothing.Letmenotbedetainedthusagainstmywill!--UnhappycreaturethatIam,saidshe,inakindofphrensy,wringingherhandsatthesametime,andturningfromme,hereyesliftedup!'Thycurse,Omycruelfather,seemstobenowintheheightofitsoperation!--Myweakenedmindisfullofforebodings,thatIaminthewayofbeingalostcreatureastobothworlds!Blessed,blessedGod,saidshe,fallingonherknees,saveme,Osaveme,frommyselfandfromthisman!'

Isunkdownonmykneesbyher,excessivelyaffecting--OthatIcould

recallyesterday!--Forgiveme,mydearestcreature,forgivewhatispast,asitcannotnow,butbyoneway,beretrieved.Forgivemeonlyonthiscondition--Thatmyfuturefaithandhonour--

Sheinterruptedme,rising--Ifyoumeantobegofmenevertoseektoavengemyselfbylaw,orbyanappealtomyrelations,tomycousinMordeninparticular,whenhecomestoEngland----

D--nthelaw,risingalso,[shestarted,]andallthosetowhomyoutalkofappealing!--Idefyboththeoneandtheother--AllIbegisYOUR



forgiveness;andthatyouwill,onmyunfeignedcontrition,re-establishmeinyourfavour----

Ono,no,no!liftingupherclaspedhands,Ineverneverwill,never,nevercanforgiveyou!--anditisapunishmentworsethandeathtome,thatIamobligedtomeetyou,ortoseeyou.

Thisisthelasttime,mydearestlife,thatyouwilleverseemeinthisposture,onthisoccasion:andagainIkneeledtoher.Letmehope,thatyouwillbeminenextThursday,youruncle'sbirth-day,ifnotbefore.WouldtoHeavenIhadneverbeenavillain!Yourindignationisnot,cannotbegreater,thanmyremorse--andItookholdofhergownforshewasgoingfromme.

Beremorsethyportion!--Forthineownsake,beremorsethyportion!--Inever,neverwillforgivethee!--Inever,neverwillbethine!--Letmeretire!--Whykneelestthoutothewretchwhomthouhastsovilelyhumbled?

Saybut,dearestcreature,youwillconsider--saybutyouwilltaketimetoreflectuponwhatthehonourofbothourfamiliesrequiresofyou.Iwillnotrise.Iwillnotpermityoutowithdraw[stillholdinghergown]tillyoutellmeyouwillconsider.--Takethisletter.Weighwellyoursituation,andmine.Sayyouwillwithdrawtoconsider;andthenIwillnotpresumetowithold[sic]you.

Compulsionshalldonothingwithme.Thoughaslave,aprisoner,incircumstance,Iamnoslaveinmywill!--NothingwillIpromisethee!--Withheld,compelled--nothingwillIpromisethee!

Noblecreature!butnotimplacable,Ihope!--Promisemebuttoreturninanhour!

NothingwillIpromisethee!

Saybutthatyouwillseemeagainthisevening!

OthatIcouldsay--thatitwereinmypowertosay--Ineverwillsee

theemore!--WouldtoHeavenIneverweretoseetheemore!

Passionatebeauty!--stillholdingher--

Ispeak,thoughwithvehemence,thedeliberatewishofmyheart.--OthatIcouldavoidlookingdownuponthee,meangroveler,andabjectasinsulting--Letmewithdraw!Mysoulisintumults!Letwe[sic]withdraw!

Iquittedmyholdtoclaspmyhandstogether--Withdraw,Osovereignofmyfate!--Withdraw,ifyouwillwithdraw!Mydestinyisinyourpower!--Itdependsuponyourbreath!--Yourscornbutaugmentsmylove!Yourresentmentisbuttoowellfounded!--But,dearestcreature,return,

return,return,witharesolutiontoblesswithpardonandpeaceyourfaithfuladorer!

Sheflewfromme.Theangel,assoonasshefoundherwings,flewfromme.I,thereptilekneeler,thedespicableslave,nomoretheproudvictor,arose;and,retiring,triedtocomfortmyself,that,circumstancedassheis,destituteoffriendsandfortune;herunclemoreover,whoistoreconcileallsosoon,(asIthankmystarsshestillbelieves,)expected.



Othatshewouldforgiveme!--Wouldshebutgenerouslyforgiveme,andreceivemyvowsatthealtar,attheinstantofherforgivingme,thatImightnothavetimetorelapseintomyoldprejudices!Bymysoul,Belford,thisdeargirlgivesthelietoallourrakishmaxims.Theremustbesomethingmorethananameinvirtue!--Inowseethatthereis!--Oncesubdued,alwayssubdued--'Tisanegregiousfalsehood!--But,OJack,sheneverwassubdued.WhathaveIobtainedbutanincreaseofshameandconfusion!--Whilehergloryhasbeenestablishedbyhersufferings!

Thisonemeritis,however,leftme,thatIhavelaidallhersexunderobligationtome,byputtingthisnoblecreaturetotrials,which,sogloriouslysupported,havedonehonourtothemall.

However--ButnomorewillIadd--Whataforcehaveevilhabits!--Iwilltakeanairing,andtrytoflyfrommyself!--Donotthouupbraidmeonmyweakfits--onmycontradictorypurposes--onmyirresolution--andallwillbewell.

LETTERXXX

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.WEDNESDAYNIGHT.

AmanisjustnowarrivedfromM.Hall,whotellsme,thatmyLordisinaverydangerousway.Thegoutinhisstomachtoanextremedegree,occasionedbydrinkingagreatquantityoflemonade.

Amanof8000Â£.ayeartopreferhisappetitetohishealth!--Hedeservestodie!--Butwehaveallofusourinordinatepassionstogratify:andtheygenerallybringtheirpunishmentalongwiththem--sowitnessesthenephew,aswellastheuncle.

Thefellowwassentuponotherbusiness;butstretchedhisordersalittle,tomakehiscourttoasuccessor.

IamgladIwasnotatM.Hall,atthetimemyLordtookthegratefuldose:[itwascertainlygratefultohimatthetime:]therearepeopleintheworld,whowouldhavehadthewickednesstosay,thatIhadpersuadedhimtodrink.

Themansays,thathisLordshipwassobadwhenhecameaway,thatthefamilybegantotalkofsendingformeinposthaste.AsIknowtheoldpeerhasagooddealofcashbyhim,ofwhichheseldomkeepsaccount,itbehovesmetogodownassoonasIcan.ButwhatshallIdowiththisdearcreaturethewhile?--To-morrowover,Ishall,perhaps,beabletoanswermyownquestion.Iamafraidshewillmakemedesperate.

ForherehaveIsenttoimplorehercompany,andamdeniedwithscorn.

***

Ihavebeensohappyastoreceive,thismoment,athirdletterfromthedearcorrespondentMissHowe.Alittleseveredevil!--Itwouldhavebrokentheheartofmybeloved,haditfallenintoherhands.I



willencloseacopyofit.Readithere.

TUESDAY,JUNE20.

MYDEARESTMISSHARLOWE,

AgainIventuretoyou,(almostagainstinclination;)andthatbyyourformerconveyance,littleasIlikeit.

Iknownothowitiswithyou.Itmaybebad;andthenitwouldbehardtoupbraidyou,forasilenceyoumaynotbeabletohelp.Butifnot,whatshallIsaysevereenough,thatyouhavenotansweredeitherofmylastletters?thefirst*ofwhich[andIthinkitimportedyoutoomuchtobesilentuponit]youownedthereceiptof.Theotherwhichwasdeliveredintoyourownhands,**wassopressingforthefavourofalinefromyou,thatIamamazedIcouldnotbeobliged;andstillmore,thatIhavenotheardfromyousince.

*SeeVol.V.LetterXX.**SeeVol.VI.LetterVII.

Thefellowmadesostrangeastoryoftheconditionhesawyouin,andofyourspeechtohim,thatIknownotwhattoconcludefromit:only,thatheisasimple,blundering,andyetconceitedfellow,who,aimingatdescription,andtherusticwonderful,givesanairofbumkinlyromancetoallhetells.Thatthisishischaracter,youwillbelieve,whenyouareinformedthathedescribedyouingriefexcessive,*yetsoimprovedinyourpersonandfeatures,andsorosy,thatwashisword,inyourface,andsoflush-coloured,andsoplumpinyourarms,thatonewouldconcludeyouwerelabouringundertheoperationofsomemalignantpoison;andsomuchtherather,ashewasintroducedtoyou,whenyouwereuponacouch,fromwhichyouofferednottorise,orsitup.

*SeeVol.VI.LetterVI.

Uponmyword,MissHarlowe,Iamgreatlydistresseduponyouraccount;forImustbesofreeastosay,thatinyourreadyreturnwithyourdeceiver,youhavenotatallansweredmyexpectations,noracteduptoyourowncharacter;forMrs.Townsendtellsme,fromthewomenatHampstead,howcheerfullyyouputyourselfintohishandsagain:yet,atthetime,itwasimpossibleyoushouldbemarried!--

Lord,mydear,whatpityitis,thatyoutookmuchpainstogetfromtheman!--Butyouknowbest!--SometimesIthinkitcouldnotbeyouto

whomtherusticdeliveredmyletter.Butitmusttoo:yet,itisstrangeIcouldnothaveonelinebyhim:--notone:--andyousosoonwellenoughtogowiththewretchbackagain!

IamnotsurethattheletterIamnowwritingwillcometoyourhands:soshallnotsayhalfthatIhaveuponmymindtosay.But,ifyouthinkitworthyourwhiletowritetome,prayletmeknowwhatfineladieshisrelationsthosewerewhovisitedyouatHampstead,andcarriedyoubackagainsojoyfullytoaplacethatIhadsofullywarnedyou.--ButIwillsaynomore:atleasttillIknowmore:forIcandonothing



butwonderandstandamazed.

Notwithstandingalltheman'sbaseness,'tisplaintherewasmorethanalurkinglove--GoodHeaven!--ButIhavedone!--YetIknownothowtohavedoneneither!--YetImust--Iwill.

Onlyaccounttome,mydear,forwhatIcannotatallaccountfor:andinformme,whetheryouarereallymarried,ornot.--AndthenIshallknowwhethertheremustormustnot,beaperiodshorterthanthatofoneofourlives,toafriendshipwhichhashithertobeentheprideandboastof

YourANNAHOWE.

***

Dorcastellsme,thatshehasjustnowhadasearchingconversation,asshecallsit,withherlady.Sheiswilling,shetellsthewench,stilltoplaceherconfidenceinher.Dorcashopesshehasre-assuredher:butwishesmenottodependuponit.YetCaptainTomlinson'slettermustassuredlyweighwithher.

IsentitinjustnowbyDorcas,desiringhertore-peruseit.Anditwasnotreturnedme,asIfeareditwouldbe.Andthat'sagoodsign,Ithink.

IsayIthink,andIthink;forthischarmingcreature,entangledasIaminmyowninventions,puzzlesmetenthousandtimesmorethanIher.

LETTERXXXI


THURSDAYNOON,JUNE22.

LetmeperishifIknowwhattomakeeitherofmyselforofthissurprisingcreature--nowcalm,nowtempestuous.--ButIknowthoulovestnotanticipationanymorethanI.

Atmyrepeatedrequests,shemetmeatsixthismorning.

Shewasreadydressed;forshehadnotherclothesoffeverysinceshedeclared,thattheynevermoreshouldbeoffinthishouse.Andcharminglyshelooked,withallthedisadvantagesofathree-hoursviolentstomach-ache--(forDorcastoldmethatshehadbeenreallyill)--

norest,andeyesredandswelledwithweeping.Strangetomethatthosecharmingfountainshavenotbeensolongagoexhausted!Butsheisawoman.AndIbelieveanatomistsallow,thatwomenhavemorewatryheadsthanmen.

Well,mydearestcreature,IhopeyouhavenowthoroughlyconsideredofthecontentsofCaptainTomlinson'sletter.Butaswearethusearlymet,letmebeseechyoutomakethismyhappyday.

Shelookednotfavourablyuponme.Acloudhunguponherbrowather



entrance:butasshewasgoingtoanswerme,astillgreatersolemnitytookpossessionofhercharmingfeatures.

Yourair,andyourcountenance,mybelovedcreature,arenotpropitioustome.Letmebegofyou,beforeyouspeak,toforbearallfurtherrecriminations:foralreadyIhavesuchasenseofmyvilenesstoyou,thatIknownothowtobearthereproachesofmyownmind.

Ihavebeenendeavouring,saidshe,sinceIamnotpermittedtoavoidyou,toobtainacomposurewhichInevermoreexpectedtoseeyouin.HowlongImayenjoyit,Icannottell.ButIhopeIshallbeenabledtospeaktoyouwithoutthatvehemencewhichIexpressedyesterday,andcouldnothelpit.*

*TheLady,inherminutes,says,'IfearDorcasisafalseone.MayInotbeabletoprevailuponhimtoleavemeatmyliberty?Bettertotrythantotrusttoher.IfIcannotprevail,butmustmeethimandmyuncle,IhopeIshallhavefortitudeenoughtorenouncehimthen.ButIwouldfainavoidqualifyingwiththewretch,ortogivehimanexpectationwhichIintendnottoanswer.IfIammistressofmyownresolutions,myunclehimselfshallnotprevailwithmetobindmysoulincovenantwithsovileaman.'

Afterapause(forIwasallattention)thussheproceeded:

Itiseasyforme,Mr.Lovelace,toseethatfurtherviolencesareintendedme,ifIcomplynotwithyourpurposes,whatevertheyare,Iwillsupposethemtobewhatyousolemnlyprofesstheyare.ButIhavetoldyouassolemnlymymind,thatIneverwill,thatInevercanbeyour's;nor,ifso,anyman'suponearth.Allvengeance,nevertheless,forthewrongsyouhavedoneme,Idisclaim.Iwantbuttoslideintosomeobscurecorner,tohidemyselffromyouandfromeveryonewhooncelovedme.Thedesirelatelysonearmyheart,ofareconciliationwithmyfriends,ismuchabated.Theyshallnotreceivemenow,iftheywould.Sunkinmineowneyes,Inowthinkmyselfunworthyoftheir

favour.Intheanguishofmysoul,therefore,Iconjureyou,Lovelace,[tearsinhereyes,]toleavemetomyfate.Indoingso,youwillgivemeapleasurethehighestInowcanknow.

Where,mydearestlife----

Nomatterwhere.IwillleavetoProvidence,whenIamoutofthishouse,thedirectionofmyfuturesteps.Iamsensibleenoughofmydestitutecondition.IknowthatIhavenotnowafriendintheworld.EvenMissHowehasgivenmeup--oryouare--ButIwouldfainkeepmytemper!--ByyourmeansIhavelostthemall--andyouhavebeenabarbarousenemytome.Youknowyouhave.

Shepaused.

Icouldnotspeak.

TheevilsIhavesuffered,proceededshe,[turningfromme,]howeverirreparable,arebuttemporarilyevils.LeavemetomyhopesofbeingenabledtoobtaintheDivineforgivenessfortheoffenceIhavebeendrawnintogivetomyparentsandtovirtue;thatsoImayavoidtheevilsthataremorethantemporary.ThisisnowallIhavetowishfor.AndwhatisitthatIdemand,thatIhavenotarightto,and



fromwhichitisanillegalviolencetowithholdme?

Itwasimpossibleforme,Itoldherplainly,tocomply.

Ibesoughthertogivemeherhandasthisveryday.Icouldnotlivewithouther.IcommunicatedtohermyLord'sillness,asareasonwhyIwishednottostayforheruncle'sanniversary.Ibesoughthertoblessmewithherconsent;and,aftertheceremonywaspassed,toaccompanymedowntoBerks.Andthus,mydearestlife,saidI,willyoubefreedfromahouse,towhichyouhaveconceivedsogreatanantipathy.

This,thouwiltown,wasaprincelyoffer.AndIwasresolvedtobeasgoodasmyword.IthoughtIhadkilledmyconscience,asItoldthee,Belford,sometimeago.Butconscience,Ifind,thoughitmaybetemporarilystifled,cannotdie,and,whenitdarenotspeakaloud,willwhisper.AndatthisinstantIthoughtIfelttherevivedvarletess(onbutaslightretrogrademotion)writhingroundmypericardiumlikeaserpent;andintheactionofadyingone,(collectingallitsforceintoitshead,)fixitsplaguyfangsintomyheart.

Shehesitated,andlookeddown,asifirresolute.Andthissetmyheartupatmymouth.And,believeme,Ihadinstantlypoptinuponme,inimagination,anoldspectacledparson,withawhitesurplice

thrownoverablackhabit,[afitemblemofthehalcyonoffice,which,underabenignappearance,oftenintroducedalifeofstormsandtempests,]whiningandsnufflingthroughhisnosetheirrevocableceremony.

Ihopenow,mydearestlife,saidI,snatchingherhand,andpressingittomylips,thatyoursilencebodesmegood.Letme,mybelovedcreature,havebutyourtacitconsent;andthismomentIwillstepoutandengageaminister.AndthenIpromisedhowmuchmywholefuturelifeshouldbedevotedtohercommands,andthatIwouldmakeherthebestandtenderestofhusbands.

Atlast,turningtome,Ihavetoldyoumymind,Mr.Lovelace,saidshe.

Thinkyou,thatIcouldthussolemnly--Thereshestopt--Iamtoomuchinyourpower,proceededshe;yourprisoner,ratherthanapersonfreetochooseformyself,ortosaywhatIwilldoorbe.Butasatestimonythatyoumeanmewell,letmeinstantlyquitthishouse;andIwillthengiveyousuchananswerinwriting,asbestbefitsmyunhappycircumstances.

Andimaginestthou,fairest,thoughtI,thatthiswillgodownwithaLovelace?Thououghtesttohaveknownthatfree-livers,likeministersofstate,neverpartwithapowerputintotheirhands,withoutanequivalentoftwicethevalue.

Ipleaded,thatifwejoinedhandsthismorning,(ifnot,to-morrow;if

not,onThursday,heruncle'sbirth-day,andinhispresence);andafterwards,asIhadproposed,setoutforBerks;weshould,ofcourse,quitthishouse;and,onourreturntotown,shouldhaveinreadinessthehouseIwasintreatyfor.

Sheansweredmenot,butwithtearsandsighs;fondofbelievingwhatIhopedIimputedhersilencetothemodestyofhersex.Thedearcreature,(thoughtI,)solemnlyasshebeganwithme,isruminating,inasweetsuspence,howtoputintofitwordsthegentlepurposesofhercondescendingheart.But,lookinginheravertedfacewithasoothing



gentleness,Iplainlyperceived,thatitwasresentment,andnotbashfulness,thatwasstrugglinginherbosom.*

*TheLady,inherminutes,ownsthedifficultyshelayundertokeephertemperinthisconference.'ButwhenIfound,'saysshe,'thatallmyentreatieswereineffectual,andthathewasresolvedtodetainme,Icouldnolongerwithholdmyimpatience.'

Atlastshebrokesilence--Ihavenopatience,saidshe,tofindmyselfaslave,aprisoner,inavilehouse--Tellme,Sir,insomanywordstellme,whetheritbe,orbenot,yourintentiontopermitmetoquitit?--TopermitmethefreedomwhichismybirthrightasanEnglishsubject?

WillnottheconsequenceofyourdeparturehencebethatIshallloseyouforever,Madam?--AndcanIbearthethoughtsofthat?

Sheflungfromme--Mysouldisdainstoholdparleywiththee!wereherviolentwords.--ButIthrewmyselfatherfeet,andtookholdofherreluctanthand,andbegantoimprecate,avow,topromise--Butthusthepassionatebeauty,interruptingme,wenton:

Iamsickofthee,MAN!--Onecontinuedstringofvows,oaths,andprotestations,variedonlybytimeandplace,fillsthymouth!--Whydetainestthoume?Myheartrisesagainstthee,Othoucruelimplementofmybrother'scauselessvengeance.--AllIbegoftheeis,thatthouwiltremitmethefuturepartofmyfather'sdreadfulcurse!thetemporarypart,baseandungratefulasthouart!thouhastcompleted!

Iwasspeechless!--WellImight!--Herbrother'simplement!--JamesHarlowe'simplement!--Zounds,Jack!whatwordswerethese!

Iletgoherstrugglinghand.Shetooktwoorthreeturnscrosstheroom,herwholehaughtysoulinherair.Thenapproachingme,butinsilence,turningfromme,andagaintome,inamildervoice--Iseethy

confusion,Lovelace.Orisitthyremorse?--Ihavebutonerequesttomakethee--therequestsooftenrepeated--Thatthouwiltthismomentpermitmetoquitthishouse.Adieu,then,letmesay,foreveradieu!Andmayestthouenjoythathappinessinthisworld,whichthouhastrobbedmeof;asthouhastofeveryfriendIhaveinit!

Andsayingthis,awaysheflung,leavingmeinaconfusionsogreat,thatIknewnotwhattothink,say,ordo!

ButDorcassoonrousedme--Doyouknow,Sir,runninginhastily,thatmyladyisgonedownstairs!

No,sure!--AnddownIflew,andfoundheroncemoreatthestreet-door,

contendingwithPollyHortontogetout.

Sherushedbymeintotheforeparlour,andflewtothewindow,andattemptedoncemoretothrowupthesash--Goodpeople!goodpeople!criedshe.

Icaughtherinmyarms,andliftedherfromthewindow.Butbeingafraidofhurtingthecharmingcreature,(charminginherveryrage,)sheslidthroughmyarmsonthefloor.--Letmediehere!letmediehere!wereherwords;remainingjointlessandimmovable,tillSallyandMrs.



Sinclairhurriedin.

Shewasvisiblyterrifiedatthesightoftheoldwretch;whileI(sincerelyaffected)appealed,Bearwitness,Mrs.Sinclair!--bearwitness,MissMartin!--MissHorton!--Everyonebearwitness,thatIoffernotviolencetothisbelovedcreature!

Shethenfoundherfeet--Ohouse[looktowardsthewindows,andallroundher,Ohouse,]contrivedonpurposeformyruin!saidshe--butletnotthatwomancomeintomypresence--notthatMissHortonneither,whowouldnothavedaredtocontroulme,hadshenotbeenabaseone!--

Hoh,Sir!Hoh,Madam!vociferatedtheolddragon,herarmedkemboed,andflourishingwithonefoottotheextentofherpetticoats--What'sadohereaboutnothing!Ineverknewsuchworkinmylife,betweenachickenofagentlemanandatigerofalady!--

Shewasvisiblyaffrighted:andupstairsshehastened.Abadwomaniscertainly,Jack,moreterribletoherownsexthanevenabadman.

Ifollowedherup.Sherushedbyherownapartmentintothedining-room:noterrorcanmakeherforgetherpunctilio.

Torecitewhatpassedthereofinvective,exclamations,threatenings,

evenofherownlife,ononeside;ofexpostulations,supplications,andsometimesmenaces,ontheother;wouldbetooaffecting;and,aftermyparticularityinlikescenes,thesethingsmayaswellbeimaginedasexpressed.

Iwillthereforeonlymention,that,atlength,Iextortedaconcessionfromher.Shehadreason*tothinkitwouldhavebeenworseforheronthespot,ifshehadnotmadeit.Itwas,ThatshewouldendeavourtomakeherselfeasytillshesawwhatnextThursday,heruncle'sbirth-day,wouldproduce.ButOh!thatitwerenotasin,shepassionatelyexclaimedonmakingthispoorconcession,toputandendtoherownlife,ratherthanyieldtogivemebutthatassurance!

*TheLadymentions,inhermemorandum-book,thatshehadnootherway,asisapprehended,tosaveherselffrominstantdishonour,butbymakingthisconcession.Heronlyhope,now,shesays,ifshecannotescapebyDorcas'sconnivance,(whom,neverthelessshesuspects,)istofindawaytoengagetheprotectionofheruncle,andevenofthecivilmagistrate,onThursdaynext,ifnecessary.'Heshallsee,'saysshe,'tameandtimidashethoughtme,whatIdaretodo,toavoidsohatedacompulsion,andamancapableofabasenesssopremeditatedlyvileandinhuman.'

This,however,showsme,thatsheisawarethatthereluctantly-given

assurancemaybefairlyconstruedintoamatrimonialexpectationonmyside.Andifshewillnow,evennow,lookforward,Ithink,frommyheart,thatIwillputonherlivery,andwearitforlife.

WhatasituationamIin,withallmycursedinventions!Iampuzzled,confounded,andashamedofmyself,uponthewhole.Totakesuchpainstobeavillain!--But(forthefiftiethtime)letmeaskthee,Whowouldhavethoughtthattherehadbeensuchawomanintheworld?--Nevertheless,shehadbesttakecarethatshecarriesnotherobstinacymuchfarther.Sheknowsnotwhatrevengeforslightedlovewillmakeme



do.

ThebusyscenesIhavejustpassedthroughhavegivenemotionstomyheart,whichwillnotbequietedonewhile.Myheart,Isee,(onre-perusingwhatIhavewritten,)hascommunicateditstremorstomyfingers;andinsomeplacesthecharactersaresoindistinctandunformed,thatthou'lthardlybeabletomakethemout.Butifonehalfofthemisonlyintelligible,thatwillbeenoughtoexposemetothycontempt,forthewretchedhandIhavemadeofmyplotsandcontrivances.--Butsurely,Jack,Ihavegainedsomegroundbythispromise.

Andnow,onewordtotheassurancesthousendestme,thatthouhastnotbetrayedmysecretsinrelationtothischarmingcreature.Thoumightesthavesparedthem,Belford.MysuspicionsheldnolongerthanwhileIwroteaboutthem.*ForwellIknew,whenIallowedmyselftimetothink,thatthouhadstnoprinciples,novirtue,tobemisledby.Agreatdealofstrongenvy,andalittleofweakpity,Iknewtobethymotives.Thoucouldstnotprovokemyanger,andmycompassionthoueverhadst;andartnowmoreespeciallyentitledtoit;becausethouartapityfulfellow.

Allthynewexpostulationsinmybeloved'sbehalfIwillanswerwhenIseethee.

LETTERXXXII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.THURSDAYNIGHT.

Confoundedlyoutofhumourwiththisperversewoman!--Norwiltthoublameme,ifthouartmyfriend.Sheregardstheconcessionshemade,asaconcessionextortedfromher:andwearebutjustwherewewerebeforeshemadeit.

WithgreatdifficultyIprevaileduponhertofavourmewithhercompanyforonehalfhourthisevening.ThenecessityIwasundertogodowntoM.HallwasthesubjectIwantedtotalkupon.

Itoldher,thatasshehadbeensogoodastopromisethatshewouldendeavourtomakeherselfeasytillshesawtheThursdayinnextweekover,Ihopedthatshewouldnotscrupletoobligemewithherword,thatIshouldfindherhereatmyreturnfromM.Hall.

Indeedshewouldmakenosuchpromise.Nothingofthishousewasmentionedtome,saidshe:youknowitwasnot.AnddoyouthinkthatIwouldhavegivenmyconsenttomyimprisonmentinit?

Iwasplaguilynettled,anddisappointedtoo.IfIgonotdowntoMr.Hall,Madam,you'llhavenoscrupletostayhere,Isuppose,tillThursdayisover?

IfIcannothelpmyselfImust--butIinsistuponbeingpermittedtogooutofthishouse,whetheryouleaveitornot.

Well,Madam,thenIwillcomplywithyourcommands.AndIwillgooutthisveryeveninginquestoflodgingsthatyoushallhavenoobjectionsto.



Iwillhavenolodgingsofyourproviding,Sir--IwillgotoMrs.Moore's,atHampstead.

Mrs.Moore's,Madam!--IhavenoobjectiontoMrs.Moore's--butwillyougivemeyourpromise,toadmitmetheretoyourpresence?

AsIdohere--whenIcannothelpit.

Verywell,Madam--Willyoubesogoodastoletmeknowwhatyouintendbyyourpromisetomakeyourselfeasy.

Toendeavour,Sir,tomakemyselfeasy--werethewords----

TillyousawwhatnextThursdaywouldproduce?

Askmenoquestionsthatmayensnareme.IamtoosincereforthecompanyIamin.

Letmeaskyou,Madam,Whatmeantyou,whenyousaid,'that,wereitnotasin,youwoulddiebeforeyougavemethatassurance?'

Shewasindignantlysilent.

Youthought,Madam,youhadgivenmeroomtohopeyourpardonbyit?WhenIthinkIoughttoansweryouwithpatienceIwillspeak.

Doyouthinkyourselfinmypower,Madam?

IfIwerenot--Andthereshestopt----

Dearestcreature,speakout--Ibeseechyou,dearestcreature,speakout----

Shewassilent;hercharmingfaceallinaglow.

Haveyou,Madam,anyrelianceuponmyhonour?

Stillsilent.

Youhateme,Madam!YoudespisememorethanyoudothemostodiousofGod'screatures!

Yououghttodespiseme,ifIdidnot.

Yousay,Madam,youareinabadhouse.Youhavenorelianceuponmyhonour--youbelieveyoucannotavoidme----

Shearose.Ibeseechyou,letmewithdraw.

Isnatchedherhand,rising,andpresseditfirsttomylips,andthentomyheart,inwilddisorder.Shemighthavefelttheboundingmischiefreadytoburstitsbars--Youshallgo--toyourownapartment,ifyouplease--But,bythegreatGodofHeaven,Iwillaccompanyyouthither!

Shetrembled--Pray,pray,Mr.Lovelace,don'tterrifymeso!

Beseated,Madam!Ibeseechyou,beseated!----



Iwillsitdown----

Dothen--Allmysoulisinmyeyes,andmyheart'sbloodthrobbingatmyfingers'ends.

Iwill--Iwill--Youhurtme--Pray,Mr.Lovelace,don't--don'tfrightenmeso--Anddownshesat,trembling;myhandstillgraspingher's.

Ihungoverherthrobbingbosom,andputtingmyotherarmroundherwaist--Andyousay,youhateme,Madam--andyousay,youdespiseme--andyousay,youpromisemenothing----

Yes,yes,Ididpromiseyou--letmenotbehelddownthus--youseeIsatdownwhenyoubidme--Why[struggling]needyouholdmedownthus?--IdidpromisetoendeavourtobeeasytillThursdaywasover!Butyouwon'tletme!--HowcanIbeeasy?--Pray,letmenotbethusterrified.

Andwhat,Madam,meantyoubyyourpromise?Didyoumeananythinginmyfavour?--YoudesignedthatIshould,atthattime,thinkyoudid.Didyoumeananythinginmyfavour,Madam?--DidyouintendthatIshouldthinkyoudid?

Letgomyhand,Sir--Takeawayyourarmfromaboutme,[struggling,yettrembling,]--Whydoyougazeuponmeso?

Answerme,Madam--Didyoumeananythinginmyfavourbyyourpromise?

Letmebenotthusconstrainedtoanswer.

Thenpausing,andgainingmorespirit,Letmego,saidshe:Iambutawoman--butaweakwoman.

Butmylifeisinmyownpower,thoughmypersonisnot--Iwillnotbethusconstrained.

Youshallnot,Madam,quittingherhand,bowing;butmyheartisatmymouth,andhopingfartherprovocation.

Shearose,andwashurryingaway.

Ipursueyounot,Madam--Iwilltryyourgenerosity.Stop--return--thismomentstop,return,if,Madam,youwouldnotmakemedesperate.

Shestoptatthedoor;burstintotears--OLovelace!--How,how,haveIdeserved----

Bepleased,dearestangel,toreturn.

Shecameback--butwithdeclaredreluctance;andimputinghercompliancetoterror.

Terror,Jack,asIhaveheretoforefoundout,thoughIhavesolittlebenefitedbythediscovery,mustbemyresort,ifshemakeitnecessary--nothingelsewilldowiththeinflexiblecharmer.

Sheseatedherselfover-againstme;extremelydiscomposed--butindignationhadavisiblepredominanceinherfeatures.

Iwasgoingtowardsher,withacountenanceintendedlychangedtoloveandsoftness:Sweetest,dearestangel,weremywords,inthetenderest



accent:--But,risingup,sheinsisteduponmybeingseatedatadistancefromher.

Iobeyed,andbeggedherhandoverthetable,tomyextendedhand;tosee,ifinanythingshewouldobligeme.Butnothinggentle,soft,oraffectionate,woulddo.Sherefusedmeherhand!--Wasshewise,Jack,toconfirmtome,thatnothingbutterrorwoulddo?

Letmeonlyknow,Madam,ifyourpromisetoendeavourtowaitwithpatiencetheeventofnextThursdaymeantmefavour?

Doyouexpectanyvoluntaryfavourfromonetowhomyougivenotafreechoice?

Doyouintend,Madam,tohonourmewithyourhand,inyouruncle'spresence,ordoyounot?

Myheartandmyhandshallneverbeseparated.Why,thinkyou,didIstandinoppositiontothewillofmybest,mynaturalfriends.

Iknowwhatyoumean,Madam--AmIthenashatefultoyouasthevileSolmes?

Askmenotsuchaquestion,Mr.Lovelace.

Imustbeanswered.AmIashatefultoyouasthevileSolmes?

WhydoyoucallMr.Solmesvile?

Don'tyouthinkhimso,Madam?

WhyshouldI?DidMr.Solmeseverdovilelybyme?

Dearestcreature!don'tdistractmebyhatefulcomparisons!andperhapsbyamorehatefulpreference.

Don'tyou,Sir,putquestionstomethatyouknowIwillanswertruly,

thoughmyanswerwereeversomuchtoenrageyou.

Myheart,Madam,mysoulisallyour'satpresent.Butyoumustgivemehope,thatyourpromise,inyourownconstruction,bindsyou,nonewcausetothecontrary,tobemineonThursday.HowelsecanIleaveyou?

LetmegotoHampstead;andtrusttomyfavour.

MayItrusttoit?--SayonlymayItrusttoit?

Howwillyoutrusttoit,ifyouextortananswertothisquestion?

Sayonly,dearestcreature,sayonly,mayItrusttoyourfavour,ifyou

gotoHampstead?

Howdareyou,Sir,ifImustspeakout,expectapromiseoffavourfromme?--Whatameancreaturemustyouthinkme,aftertheungratefulbasenesstome,wereItogiveyousuchapromise?

Thenstandingup,Thouhastmademe,Ovilestofmen![herhandsclasped,andafacecrimsonedwithindignation,]aninmateofthevilestofhouses--nevertheless,whileIaminit,Ishallhaveaheartincapableofanythingbutabhorrenceofthatandofthee!



Androundherlookedtheangel,anduponme,withfearinhersweetaspectoftheconsequenceofherfreedeclaration--ButwhatadevilmustIhavebeen,Iwholovebraveryinaman,hadInotbeenmorestruckwithadmirationofherfortitudeattheinstant,thanstimulatedbyrevenge?

Noblestofcreatures!--AnddoyouthinkIcanleaveyou,andmyinterestinsuchanexcellence,precarious?Nopromise!--nohope!--Ifyoumakemenotdesperate,maylightningblastme,ifIdoyounotallthejustice'tisinmypowertodoyou!

Ifyouhaveanyintentiontoobligeme,leavemeatmyownliberty,andletmenotbedetainedinthisabominablehouse.TobeconstrainedasIhavebeenconstrained!tobestoptbyyourvileagents!tobebroughtupbyforce,andbebruisedinmyowndefenceagainstsuchillegalviolence!--Idaretodie,Lovelace--andshewhofearsnotdeath,isnottobeintimidatedintoameannessunworthyofherheartandprinciples!

Wonderfulcreature!Butwhy,Madam,didyouleadmetohopeforsomethingfavourablefornextThursday?--Oncemore,makemenotdesperate--Withallyourmagnanimity,gloriouscreature![Iwasmorethanhalffrantic,Belford,]youmay,youmay--butdonot,donotmakemebrutallythreatenyou--donot,donotmakemedesperate!

Myaspect,Ibelieve,threatenedstillmorethanmywords.Iwasrising--Sherose--Mr.Lovelace,bepacified--youareevenmoredreadfulthantheLovelaceIhavelongdreaded--letmeretire--Iaskyourleavetoretire--youreallyfrightenme--yetIgiveyounohope--frommyheartIab----

Saynot,Madam,youabhorme.Youmust,foryourownsake,concealyourhatred--atleastnotavowit.Iseizedherhand.

Letmeretire--letme,retire,saidshe,inamanneroutofbreath.

Iwillonlysay,Madam,thatIrefermyselftoyourgenerosity.Myheartisnottobetrustedatthisinstant.Asamarkofmysubmissiontoyour

will,youshall,ifyouplease,withdraw--butIwillnotgotoM.Hall--liveordiemyLordM.IwillnotgotoM.Hall--butwillattendtheeffectofyourpromise.Remember,Madam,youhavepromisedtoendeavourtomakeyourselfeasytillyouseetheeventofnextThursday--nextThursday,remember,yourunclecomesup,toseeusmarried--that'stheevent.--YouthinkillofyourLovelace--donot,Madam,sufferyourownmoralstobedegradedbytheinfection,asyoucalledit,ofhisexample.

Awayflewthecharmerwiththishalfpermission--andnodoubtthoughtthatshehadanescape--norwithoutreason.

Iknewnotforhalfanhourwhattodowithmyself.Vexedattheheart,nevertheless,(nowshewasfromme,andwhenIreflecteduponherhatred

ofme,andherdefiances,)thatIsufferedmyselftobesooverawed,checked,restrained----

AndnowIhavewrittenthusfar,(haveofcourserecollectedthewholeofourconversation,)Iammoreandmoreincensedagainstmyself.

ButIwillgodowntothesewomen--andperhapssuffermyselftobelaughedatbythem.

Devilfetchthem,theypretendtoknowtheirownsex.Sallywasawoman



welleducated--Pollyalso--bothhaveread--bothhavesense--ofparentagenotmean--oncemodestboth--still,theysay,hadbeenmodest,butforme--notentirelyindelicatenow;thoughtoolittleniceformypersonalintimacy,lothastheybotharetohavemethinkso--theoldone,too,awomanoffamily,thoughthus(frombadinclinationaswellasatfirstfromlowcircumstances)miserablysunk:--andhencetheyallpretendtorememberwhatoncetheywere;andvouchfortheinclinationsandhypocrisyofthewholesex,andwishfornothingsoardently,asthatIwillleavetheperverseladytotheirmanagementwhileIamgonetoBerkshire;undertakingabsolutelyforherhumilityandpassivenessonmyreturn;andcontinuallyboastingofthemanyperversecreatureswhomtheyhaveobligedtodrawintheirtraces.

***

Iamjustcomefromthesorceresses.

Iwasforcedtotakethemotherdown;forshebeganwithherHoh,Sir!withme;andtocatechizeandupbraidme,withasmuchinsolenceasifIowedhermoney.

Imadeherflythepitatlast.Strangewisheswishedweagainsteach

otheratherquittingit----Whatwerethey?--I'lltellthee----Shewishedmemarried,andtobejealousofmywife;andmyheir-apparentthechildofanotherman.Iwasevenwithherwithavengeance.Andyetthouwiltthinkthatcouldnotwellbe.--Ashow?--Ashow,Jack!--Why,Iwishedforherconsciencecometolife!AndIknow,bythegripesminegivesmeeveryhalf-hour,thatshewouldthenhaveacursedtimeofit.

SallyandPollygavethemselveshighairstoo.Theirfirstfavourswerethrownatme,[womentoboastofthosefavourswhichtheywereaswillingtoimpart,firstformsallthedifficultywiththem!asItoreceive!]Iwasupbraidedwithingratitude,dastardiceandallmydifficultieswithmyangelchargeduponmyself,forwantoffollowingmyblows;andforleavingtheproudladymistressofherownwill,andnothingtoreproach

herselfwith.Andallagreed,thattheartsusedagainstheronacertainoccasion,hadtoohighanoperationforthemormetojudgewhatherwillwouldhavebeeninthearduoustrial.Andthentheyblamedoneanother;asIcursedthemall.

Theyconcluded,thatIshouldcertainlymarry,andbealostman.AndSally,onthisoccasion,withanaffectedandmaliciouslaugh,snaptherfingersatme,andpointingtwoofeachhandforkedlyatme,bidmerememberthelinesIonceshowedherofmyfavouriteJackDryden,asshealwaysfamiliarlycallsthatcelebratedpoet:

Wewomentonewjoysunseenmaymove:Therearenoprintsleftinthepathsoflove.

Allgoodsbesidesbypublicmarksareknown:Butthosemenmostdesiretokeep,havenone.

Thisinfernalimplementhadtheconfidencefurthertohint,thatwhenawife,someothermanwouldnotfindhalfthedifficultywithmyangelthatIhadfound.Confidenceindeed!Butyet,Imustsay,ifamangiveshimselfuptothecompanyofthesedevils,theyneverlethimresttillheeithersuspectsorhatehiswife.

Butawordortwoofothermatters,ifpossible.



MethinksIlongtoknowhowcausesgoatM.Hall.Ihaveanotherprivateintimation,thattheoldpeerisinthegreatestdanger.

Imustgodown.Yetwhattodowiththisladythemeanwhile!Thesecursedwomenarefullofcrueltyandenterprise.Shewillneverbeeasywiththeminmyabsence.Theywillhaveprovocationandpretencetherefore.Butwoebetothem,if----

Yetwhatwillvengeancedo,afteraninsultcommitted?Thetwonymphswillhavejealousragetogoadthemon.Andwhatwillwithholdajealousandalready-ruinedwoman?

Tolethergoelsewhere;thatcannotbedone.Iamstilltooresolvedtobehonest,ifshe'llgivemehope:ifyetshe'llletmebehonest.ButI'llseehowshe'llbeafterthecontentionshewillcertainlyhavebetweenherresentmentandtheterrorshehasreasonforfromourlastconversation.Soletthissubjectresttillthemorning.Andtotheoldpeeroncemore.

Ishallhaveagooddealoftrouble,Ireckon,thoughnosordidman,tobedecentontheexpectedoccasion.Thenhowtoact(Iwhoamnohypocrite)inthedaysofcondolement!WhatfarceshaveItogothrough;andtobetheprincipalactorinthem!I'lltrytothinkofmyown

latterend;agraybeard,andagracelessheir;inordertomakemeserious.

Thou,Belford,knowestagooddealofthissortofgrimace;andcansthelpagayhearttoalittleofthedismal.Buttheneveryfeatureofthyfaceiscutoutforit.Myheartmaybetouched,perhaps,soonerthanthine;for,believemeornot,Ihaveaverytenderone.Butthen,nomanlookingintomyface,betheoccasionforgriefeversogreat,willbelievethathearttobedeeplydistressed.

Allisplacid,easy,serene,inmycountenance.Sorrowcannotsithalfanhourtogetheruponit.Nay,Ibelieve,thatLordM.'srecovery,shouldithappen,wouldnotaffectmeaboveaquarterofanhour.Only

thenewscenery,(andthepleasureofapinganHeraclitustothefamily,whileIamaDemocritusamongmyprivatefriends,)orIwantnothingthattheoldpeercanleaveme.Whereforethenshouldgriefsaddenanddistortsuchblythe,suchjocund,featuresasmine?

Butasforthine,weretheremurdercommittedinthestreet,andthouwertbutpassingby,themurderereveninsight,thepursuerswouldquithim,andlayholdofthee:andthyverylookswouldhang,aswellasapprehendthee.

Butonewordtobusiness,Jack.Whomdealestthouwithforthyblacks?--Wertthouwellused?--Ishallwantaplaguyparcelofthem.ForIintendtomakeeverysoulofthefamilymourn--outside,ifnotin.

LETTERXXXIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.JUNE23,FRIDAYMORNING.

Iwentoutearlythismorning,onadesignthatIknownotyetwhether



Ishallorshallnotpursue;andonmyreturnfoundSimonParsons,myLord'sBerkshirebailiff,(justbeforearrived,)waitingformewithamessageinform,sentbyallthefamily,topressmetogodown,andthatatmyLord'sparticulardesire,whowantstoseemebeforehedies.

SimonhasbroughtmyLord'schariot-and-six[perhapsmyownbythistime,]tocarrymedown.Ihaveorderedittobeinreadinessbyfourto-morrowmorning.Thecattleshallsmokeforthedelay;andbytherestthey'llhaveintheinterim,willbebetterabletobearit.

Iamstillresolveduponmatrimony,ifmyfairperversewillacceptofme.But,ifshewillnot----whythenImustgiveanuninterruptedhearing,nottomyconscience,buttothesewomenbelow.

DorcashadacquaintedherladywithSimon'sarrivalanderrand.Mybelovedhaddesiredtoseehim.Butmycominginpreventedhisattendanceonher,justasDorcaswasinstructinghimwhatquestionsheshouldnotanswerto,thatmightbeaskedofhim.

Iamtobeadmittedtoherpresenceimmediately,atmyrepeatedrequest.Surelytheacquisitioninviewwillhelpmetomakeupallwithher.Sheisjustgoneuptothedining-room.

***

Nothingwilldo,Jack!--Icanprocurenofavourfromher,thoughshehasobtainedfrommethepointwhichshehadsetherheartupon.

Iwillgivetheeabriefaccountofwhatpassedbetweenus.

Ifirstproposedinstantmarriage;andthisinthemostferventmanner:butwasdeniedasfervently.

Wouldshebepleasedtoassuremethatshewouldstayhereonlytill

Tuesdaymorning?IwouldbutjustgodowntoseehowmyLordwas--toknowwhetherhehadanythingparticulartosay,orenjoinme,whileyethewassensible,ashewasveryearnesttoseeme:perhapsImightbeuponSunday.--Concedeinsomething!--Ibeseechyou,Madam,showmesomelittleconsideration.

Why,Mr.Lovelace,mustIbedeterminedbyyourmotions?--ThinkyouthatIwillvoluntarilygiveasanctiontotheimprisonmentofmyperson?Ofwhatimportancetomeoughttobeyourstayoryourreturn.

Giveasanctiontotheimprisonmentofyourperson!Doyouthink,Madam,thatIfearthelaw?

Imighthavesparedthisfoolishquestionofdefiance:butmypridewouldnotletme.Ithoughtshethreatenedme,Jack.

Idon'tthinkyoufearthelaw,Sir.--Youaretoobravetohaveanyregardeithertomoralordivinesanctions.

'Tiswell,Madam!ButaskmeanythingIcandotoobligeyou;andIwillobligeyou,thoughinnothingwillyouobligeme.

ThenIaskyou,thenIrequestofyou,toletmegotoHampstead.



Ipaused--Andatlast--Bymysoulyoushall--thisverymomentIwillwaituponyou,andseeyoufixedthere,ifyou'llpromisemeyourhandonThursday,inpresenceofyouruncle.

Iwantnotyoutoseemefixed.Iwillpromisenothing.

Takecare,Madam,thatyoudon'tletmeseethatIcanhavenorelianceuponyourfuturefavour.

Ihavebeenusedtobethreatenedbyyou,Sir--butIwillacceptofyourcompanytoHampstead--Iwillbereadytogoinaquarterofanhour--myclothesmaybesentafterme.

Youknowthecondition,Madam--NextThursday.

Youdarenottrust----

Myinfinitedemeritstellme,thatIoughtnot--neverthelessIwillconfideinyourgenerosity.--To-morrowmorning(nonewcausearisingtogivereasontothecontrary)asearlyasyoupleaseyoumaygotoHampstead.

Thisseemedtoobligeher.Butyetshelookedwithafaceofdoubt.

Iwillgodowntothewomen,Belford.Andhavingnobetterjudgesathand,willhearwhattheysayuponmycriticalsituationwiththisproudbeauty,whohassoinsolentlyrejectedaLovelacekneelingatherfeet,thoughmakinganearnesttenderofhimselfforahusband,inspiteofallhisprejudicestothestateofshackles.

LETTERXXXIV


Justcomefromthewomen.

'HaveIgonesofar,andamIafraidtogofarther?--HaveInotalready,asitisevidentbyherbehaviour,sinnedbeyondforgiveness?--Awoman'stearsusedtobetomebutaswatersprinkledonaglowingfire,whichgivesitafiercerandbrighterblaze:Whatdefencehasthisladybuthertearsandhereloquence?Shewasbeforetakenatnoweakadvantage.Shewasinsensibleinhermomentsoftrial.Hadshebeensensible,shemusthavebeensensible.Sotheysay.Themethodstakenwithherhaveaugmentedhergloryandherpride.Shehasnowataletotell,thatshemaytellwithhonourtoherself.Noaccomplice-inclination.Shecanlookmeintoconfusion,withoutbeingconsciousofsomuchasathought

whichsheneedtobeashamedof.'

This,Jack,isthesubstanceofthewomen'sreasoningswithme.

Towhichletmeadd,thatthedearcreaturenowseesthenecessityIamintoleaveher.Detectingmeisinherhead.Mycontrivancesareofsuchanature,thatImustappeartobethemostodiousofmenifIamdetectedonthissidematrimony.AndyetIhavepromised,asthouseest,thatsheshallsetouttoHampsteadassoonasshepleasesinthemorning,andthatwithoutconditiononherside.



Dostthouask,WhatImeantbythispromise?

Nonewcausearising,wastheprovisoonmyside,thou'ltremember.Buttherewillbeanewcause.

SupposeDorcasshoulddropthepromissorynotegivenherbyherlady?Servants,especiallythosewhocannotreadorwrite,arethemostcarelesspeopleintheworldofwrittenpapers.SupposeItakeitup?--atatime,too,thatIwasdeterminedthatthedearcreatureshouldbeherownmistress?--Willnotthisdetectionbeanewcause?--Acausethatwillcarrywithitagainsthertheappearanceofingratitude!

Thatshedesigneditasecrettome,arguesafearofdetection,andindirectlyasenseofguilt.Iwantedapretence.CanIhaveabetter?--IfIaminaviolentpassionuponthedetection,isnotpassionanuniversally-allowedextenuatorofviolence?Isnoteverymanandwomanobligedtoexcusethatfaultinanother,whichattimestheyfindattendedwithsuchungovernableeffectsinthemselves?

Themotherandsisterhood,suppose,broughttositinjudgmentuponthevilecorrupted--theleastbenefitthatmustaccruefromtheaccidentaldiscovery,ifnotapretenceforperpetration,[which,however,maybethecase,]anexcuseforrenewingmyordersforherdetentiontillmy

returnfromM.Hall,[thefaultherown,]andforkeepingastricterwatchoverherthanbefore;withdirectiontosendmeanylettersthatmaybewrittenbyherortoher.--AndwhenIreturn,thedevil'sinitifIfindnotawaytomakeherchooselodgingsforherself,(sincethesearesohatefultoher,)thatshallanswerallmypurposes;andyetInomoreappeartodirectherchoice,thanIdidbeforeinthese.

Thouwiltcursemewhenthoucomesttothisplace.Iknowthouwilt.Butthinkestthouthat,aftersuchaseriesofcontrivance,Iwilllosethisinimitablewomanforwantofalittlemore?Arake'sarake,Jack!--Andwhatrakeiswithheldbyprinciplefromtheperpetrationofanyevilhisheartissetupon,andinwhichhethinkshecansucceed?--Besides,amInotinearnestastomarriage?--Willnotthegeneralityof

theworldacquitme,ifIdomarry?Andwhatisthatinjurywhichachurch-ritewillnotatanytimerepair?Isnotthecatastropheofeverystorythatendsinwedlockaccountedhappy,bethedifficultiesintheprogressofiteversogreat.

Buthere,howamIengrossedbythislady,whilepoorLordM.asSimontellsme,liesgroaninginthemostdreadfulagonies!--Whatmusthesuffer!--Heavenrelievehim!--Ihaveatoocompassionateheart.Andsowouldthedearcreaturehavefound,couldIhavethoughtthattheworstofhersufferingsisequaltothelightestofhis.Imeanastofact;forastothatpartofher's,whicharisesfromextremesensibility,Iknownothingofthat;andcannotthereforebeanswerableforit.

LETTERXXXV


Justcomefrommycharmer.Shewillnotsuffermetosayhalftheobliging,thetenderthings,whichmyhonestheartisreadytooverflowwith.Aconfoundedsituationthat,whenamanfindshimselfinhumour



tobeeloquent,andpatheticatthesametime,yetcannotengagethemistressofhisfatetolendaneartohisfinespeeches.

Icanaccountnowhowitcomesaboutthatlovers,whentheirmistressesarecruel,runintosolitude,anddisburthentheirmindstostocksandstones:ForamInotforcedtomakemycomplaintstothee?

Sheclaimedtheperformanceofmypromise,themomentshesawme,ofpermittingher[haughtilyshespoketheword]togotoHampsteadassoonasIwasgonetoBerks.

MostcheerfullyIrenewedit.

Shedesiredmetogiveordersinherhearing.

IsentforDorcasandWill.Theycame.--Doyoubothtakenotice,(but,perhaps,Sir,Imaytakeyouwithme,)thatyourladyistobeobeyedinallhercommands.ShepurposestoreturntoHampsteadassoonasIamgone--Mydear,willyounothaveaservanttoattendyou?

Ishallwantnoservantthere.

WillyoutakeDorcas?

IfIshouldwantDorcas,Icansendforher.Dorcascouldnotbutsay,Sheshouldbeveryproud--

Well,well,thatmaybeatmyreturn,ifyourladypermit.--ShallI,mydear,callupMrs.Sinclair,andgiveherorders,tothesameeffect,inyourhearing?

IdesirenottoseeMrs.Sinclair;noranythatbelongtoher.

Asyouplease,Madam.

Andthen(theservantsbeingwithdrawn)Iurgedheragainforthe

assurance,thatshewouldmeetmeatthealtaronThursdaynext.Buttonopurpose.--Mayshenotthankherselfforallthatmayfollow?

Onefavour,however,Iwouldnotbedenied,tobeadmittedtopasstheeveningwithher.

AllsweetnessandobsequiousnesswillIbeonthisoccasion.Mywholesoulshallbepouredouttomovehertoforgiveme.Ifshewillnot,andifthepromissorynoteshouldfallinmyway,myrevengewilldoubtlesstaketotalpossessionofme.

Allthehouseinmyinterest,andeveryoneinitnotonlyengagingtointimidateandassist,asoccasionshalloffer,butstakingalltheir

experienceuponmysuccess,ifitbenotmyownfault,whatmustbetheconsequence?

This,Jack,however,shallbeherlasttrial;andifshebehaveasnoblyinandafterthissecondattempt(allhersensesabouther)asshehasdoneafterthefirst,shewillcomeoutanangeluponfullproof,inspiteofman,woman,anddevil:thenshalltherebeanendofallhersufferings.Iwillthenrenouncethatvanquisheddevil,andreform.Andifanyvilemachinationstartup,presumingtomisleadme,Iwillsoonerstabitinmyheart,asitrises,thangivewaytoit.



Afewhourswillnowdecideall.Butwhateverbetheevent,Ishallbetoobusytowriteagain,tillIgettoM.Hall.

Meantime,Iaminstrangeagitations.Imustsuppressthem,ifpossible,beforeIventureintoherpresence.--Myheartbouncesmybosomfromthetable.Iwilllaydownmypen,andwhollyresigntoitsimpulses.

LETTERXXXVI

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.FRIDAYNIGHT,ORRATHERSAT.MORN.ONEO'CLOCK.

IthoughtIshouldnothavehadeithertimeorinclinationtowriteanotherlinebeforeIgottoM.Hall.But,havingthefirst,mustfindthelast;sinceIcanneithersleep,nordoanythingbutwrite,ifIcandothat.Iammostconfoundedlyoutofhumour.Thereasonletitfollow;ifitwillfollow--norpreparationforitfromme.

Itriedbygentlenessandlovetosoften--What?--Marble.Aheart

incapableeitherofloveorgentleness.Herpastinjuriesforeverinherhead.Readytoreceiveafavour;thepermissiontogotoHampstead:butneithertodeserveit,norreturnany.Somyschemeofthegentlekindwassoongivenover.

Ithenwantedtoprovokeher:likeacowardboy,whowaitsforthefirstblowbeforehecanpersuadehimselftofight,Ihalfchallengedhertochallengeordefyme.Sheseemedawareofherdanger;andwouldnotdirectlybravemyresentment:butkeptsuchamiddlecourse,thatIneithercouldfindapretencetooffend,norreasontohope:yetshebelievedmytale,thatherunclewouldcometoKentish-town,andseemednottoapprehendthatTomlinsonwasanimpostor.

Shewasveryuneasy,uponthewhole,inmycompany:wantedoftentobreakfromme:yetsoheldmetomypurposeofpermittinghertogotoHampstead,thatIknewnothowtogetoffit;althoughitwasimpossible,inmyprecarioussituationwithher,tothinkofperformingit.

Inthissituation;thewomenreadytoassist;and,ifIproceedednot,asreadytoridiculeme;whathadIleftme,buttopursuetheconcertedscheme,andtoseekapretencetoquarrelwithher,inordertorevokemypromisedpermission,andtoconvinceherthatIwouldnotbeupbraidedasthemostbrutalofravishersfornothing?

Ihadagreedwiththewomen,thatifIcouldnotfindapretenceinher

presencetobeginmyoperations,thenoteshouldlieinmyway,andIwastopickitup,soonafterherretiringfromme.ButIbegantodoubtatnearteno'clock,(soearnestwasshetoleaveme,suspectingmyover-warmbehaviourtoher,andeagergraspingofherhandtwoorthreetimes,witheye-strings,asIfelt,onthestrain,whilehereyesshoweduneasinessandapprehension,)thatifsheactuallyretiredforthenight,itmightbeachancewhetheritwouldbeeasytocomeatheragain.Loth,therefore,torunsucharisk,Isteptoutalittleafterten,withintenttoalterthepreconcerteddispositionalittle;sayingIwouldattendheragaininstantly.ButasIreturnedImetheratthedoor,intendingto



withdrawforthenight.Icouldnotpersuadehertogoback:norhadIpresenceofmind(sofullofcomplaisanceasIwastoherjustbefore)tostayherbyforce:sosheslidthroughmyhandsintoherownapartment.Ihadnothingtodo,therefore,buttoletmyformerconcerttakeplace.

Ishouldhavepromised(butcarenotfororderoftime,connection,oranythingelse)that,betweeneightandnineintheevening,anotherservantofLordM.onhorsebackcame,todesiremetocarrydownwithmeDr.S.,theoldpeerhavingbeenonce(inextremis,astheyjudgeheisnow)relievedandreprievedbyhim.Isentandengagedthedoctortoaccompanymedown:andamtocalluponhimbyfourthismorning:orthedevilshouldhavebothmyLordandtheDoctor,ifI'dstirtillIgotallmadeup.

Pokethydamn'dnoseforwardintotheevent,ifthouwilt--Cursemeifthoushalthaveittillitspropertimeandplace.Andtoosoonthen.

Shehadhardlygotintoherchamber,butIfoundalittlepaper,asIwasgoingintomine,whichItookup;andopeningit,(foritwascarefullypinnedinanotherpaper,)whatshoulditbebutapromissorynote,givenasabribe,withafurtherpromiseofadiamondring,toinduceDorcastofavourhermistress'sescape?

Howmytemperchangedinamoment!--Ring,ring,ring,ring,Imybell,

withaviolenceenoughtobreakthestring,andasifthehousewereonfire.

Everydevilfrightedintoactivelife:thewholehouseinanuproar.UprunsWill.--Sir--Sir--Sir!--Eyesgoggling,mouthdistended--Bidthedamn'dtoadDorcascomehither,(asIstoodatthestair-head,)inahorriblerage,andoutofbreath,criedI.

Insightcamethetremblingdevil--butstandingaloof,fromthereportmadeherbyWill.ofthepassionIwasin,aswellasfromwhatshehadheard.

Flashcameoutmyswordimmediately;forIhaditreadyon--Cursed,

confounded,villanousbriberyandcorruption----

Uprunsshetoherlady'sdoor,screamingoutforsafetyandprotection.

Goodyourhonour,interposedWill.,forGod'ssake!--OLord,OLord!--receivingagoodcuff.--

Takethat,varlet,forsavingtheungratefulwretchfrommyvengeance.

Wretch!Iintendedtosay;butifitweresomeotherwordoflikeending,passionmustbemyexcuse.

Uprantwoorthreeofthesisterhood,What'sthematter!What'sthe

matter!

Thematter!(forstillmybelovedopenednotthedoor;onthecontrary,drewanotherbolt,)ThisabominableDorcas!--(callherauntup!--letherseewhatatraitressshehasplacedaboutme!--andletherbringthetoadtoanswerforherself)--hastakenabribe,aprovisionforlife,tobetrayhertrust;bythatmeanstoperpetuateaquarrelbetweenamanandhiswife,andfrustrateforeverallhopesofreconciliationbetweenus!

Letmeperish,Belford,ifIhavepatiencetoproceedwiththefarce!



***

IfImustresume,Imust----

Upcametheaunt,puffingandblowing--Asshehopedformercy,shewasnotprivytoit!Sheneverknewsuchaplotting,perverseladyinherlife!--Wellmightservantsbeatthepasstheywere,whensuchladiesasMrs.Lovelacemadenoconscienceofcorruptingthem.Forherpartshedesirednomercyforthewretch;nonieceofher's,ifshewerenotfaithfultohertrust!--Butwhatwastheproof?----

Shewasshownthepaper----

Buttooevident!--Cursed,cursedtoad,devil,jade,passedfromeachmouth:--andthevilenessofthecorrupted,andtheunworthinessofthecorruptress,wereinveighedagainst.

Upweallwent,passingthelady'sdoorintothedining-room,toproceedtotrial.----

Stamp,stamp,stampup,eachonherheels;rave,rave,rave,everytongue

----Bringupthecreaturebeforeusallthisinstant!----

Andwouldshehavegotoutofthehouse,sayyou?--

Thesethenoisesandthespeechesasweclatteredbythedoorofthefairbribress.

UpwasbroughtDorcas(whimpering)betweentwo,bothbawlingout--Youmustgo--Youshallgo--'Tisfityoushouldanswerforyourself--Youareadiscredittoallworthyservants--astheypulledandpushedherupstairs.--Shewhining,Icannotseehishonour--Icannotlooksogoodand

sogenerousagentlemanintheface--OhowshallIbearmyaunt'sravings?----

Comeup,andbed--n'd--Bringherforward,herimperialjudge--Whataplague,itisthedetection,notthecrime,thatconfoundsyou.Youcouldbequietenoughfordaystogether,asIseebythedate,underthevillany.Tellme,ungratefuldevil,tellmewhomadethefirstadvances?

Ay,disgracetomyfamilyandblood,criedtheoldone--tellhishonour--tellthetruth!--Whomadethefirstadvances?----

Ay,cursedcreature,criedSally,whomadethefirstadvances?

Ihavebetrayedonetrustalready!--Oletmenotbetrayanother!--Myladyisagoodlady!--Oletnothersuffer!--

Tellallyouknow.Tellthewholetruth,Dorcas,criedPollyHorton.--Hishonourloveshisladytoowelltomakehersuffermuch:littleassherequiteshislove!----

Everybodyseesthat,criedSally--toowell,indeed,forhishonour,Iwasgoingtosay.



Tillnow,Ithoughtshedeservedmylove--Buttobribeaservantthus,whoshesupposedhadorderstowatchhersteps,forfearofanotherelopement;andtoimputethatprecautiontomeasacrime!--YetImustloveher--Ladies,forgivemyweakness!----

Curseuponmygrimaces!--ifIhavepatiencetorepeatthem!--Butthoushalthaveitall--thoucanstnotdespisememorethanIdespisemyself!

***

Butsuppose,Sir,saidSally,youhavemyladyandthewenchfacetoface!Youseeshecaresnottoconfess.

Omycarelessness!criedDorcas--Don'tletmypoorladysuffer!--Indeed,ifyouallknewwhatIknow,youwouldsayherladyshiphasbeencruellytreated--

See,see,see,see!--repeatedly,everyoneatonce--Onlysorryforthedetection,asyourhonoursaid--notforthefault.

Cursedcreature,anddevilishcreature,fromeverymouth.

Yourladywon't,shedarenotcomeouttosaveyou,criedSally;thoughitismorehishonour'smercy,thanyourdesert,ifhedoesnotcutyourvilethroatthisinstant.

Say,repeatedPolly,wasityourladythatmadethefirstadvances,orwasityou,youcreature----

Iftheladyhadsomuchhonour,bawledthemother,excuseme,so--Excuseme,Sir,[confoundtheoldwretch!shehadliketohavesaidson!]--Iftheladyhassomuchhonour,aswehavesupposed,shewillappeartovindicateapoorservant,misled,asshehasbeen,bysuchlargepromises!--ButIhope,Sir,youwilldothembothjustice:Ihopeyouwill!--Goodlack!--Goodlack!clappingherhandstogether,togranther

everythingshecouldask--toindulgeherinherunworthyhatredtomypoorinnocenthouse!--tolethergotoHampstead,thoughyourhonourtoldus,youcouldgetnocondescensionfromher;no,nottheleast--OSir,OSir--Ihope--Ihope--ifyourladywillnotcomeout--Ihopeyouwillfindawaytohearthiscauseinherpresence.Ivaluenotmydoorsonsuchanoccasionasthis.JusticeIeverloved.Idesireyouwillcometothebottomofitinclearancetome.I'llbeswornIhadnoprivityinthisblackcorruption.

Justthenweheardthelady'sdoor,unbar,unlock,unbolt----

Now,Sir!

Now,Mr.Lovelace!

Now,Sir!fromeveryencouragingmouth!----

But,OJack!Jack!Jack!Icanwritenomore!

***



Ifyoumusthaveitall,youmust!

Now,Belford,seeusallsittinginjudgment,resolvedtopunishthefairbribress--I,andthemother,thehithertodreadedmother,theniecesSally,Polly,thetraitressDorcas,andMabell,aguard,asitwere,overDorcas,thatshemightnotrunaway,andhideherself:--allpre-determined,andofnecessitypre-determined,fromthejourneyIwasgoingtotake,andmyprecarioussituationwithher--andhearherunbolt,unlock,unbar,thedoor;then,asitprovedafterwards,putthekeyintothelockontheoutside,lockthedoor,andputitinherpocket--Will.Iknew,below,whowouldgivemenotice,if,whilewewereallabove,sheshouldmistakeherway,andgodownstairs,insteadofcomingintothedining-room:thestreet-dooralsodoublysecured,andeveryshuttertothewindowsroundthehousefastened,thatnonoiseorscreamingshouldbeheard--[suchwasthebrutalpreparation]--andthenhearhersteptowardsus,andinstantlyseeherenteramongus,confidinginherowninnocence;andwithamajestyinherpersonandmanner,thatisnaturaltoher;butwhichthenshoneoutinallitsglory!--Everytonguesilent,everyeyeawed,everyheartquaking,mine,inaparticularmannersunk,throbless,andtwicebelowitsusualregion,toonceatmythroat:--ashamefulrecreant:--Shesilenttoo,lookingroundher,firstonme;thenonthemother,nolongerfearingher;thenonSally,Polly,andtheculpritDorcas!--suchthegloriouspowerofinnocenceexertedatthatawfulmoment!

Shewouldhavespoken,butcouldnot,lookingdownmyguiltintoconfusion.Amousemighthavebeenheardpassingoverthefloor:herownlightfeetandrustlingsilkscouldnothavepreventedit;forsheseemedtotreadair,andtobeallsoul.Shepassedbackwardsandforwards,nowtowardsme,nowtowardsthedoorseveraltimes,beforespeechcouldgetthebetterofindignation;andatlast,aftertwiceorthricehemmingtorecoverherarticulatevoice--'OthoucontemptibleandabandonedLovelace,thinkestthouthatIseenotthroughthispoorvillanousplotofthine,andofthesethywickedaccomplices?

'Thou,woman,[lookingatthemother]oncemyterror!alwaysmydislike!butnowmydetestation!shouldstoncemore(forthineperhapswasthe

preparation)haveprovidedformeintoxicatingpotions,torobmeofmysenses----

'Andthen,thus,wretch,[turningtome,]mightestthoumoresecurelyhavedependeduponsuchalowcontrivanceasthis!

'Andye,vilewomen,whoperhapshavebeentheruin,bodyandsoul,ofhundredsofinnocents,(youshowmehow,infullassembly,)know,thatIamnotmarried--ruinedasIam,byyourhelp,IblessGod,Iamnotmarriedtothismiscreant--andIhavefriendsthatwilldemandmyhonouratyourhands!--andtowhoseauthorityIwillapply;fornonehasthismanoverme.Looktoitthen,whatfartherinsultsyouofferme,orincitehimtoofferme.Iamaperson,thoughthusvilelybetrayed,of

rankandfortune.Ineverwillbehis;and,toyourutterruin,willfindfriendstopursueyou:andnowIhavethisfullproofofyourdetestablewickedness,andhaveheardyourbaseincitements,willhavenomercyuponyou!'

TheycouldnotlaughatthepoorfigureImade.--Lord!howeverydevil,conscience-shaken,trembled!--

Whatadejectionmusteverfalltothelotofguilt,wereitgiventoinnocencealwaysthustoexertitself!



'Andasforthee,thouvileDorcas!Thoudoubledeceiver!--whiningoutthypretendedloveforme!--Begone,wretch!--Nobodywillhurtthee!--Begone,Isay!--thouhastoowellactedthyparttobeblamedbyanyherebutmyself--thouartsafe:thyguiltisthysecurityinsuchahouseasthis!--thyshameful,thypoorpart,thouhastaswellactedasthelowfarcecouldgivetheetoact!--aswellastheyeachofthem(thysuperiors,thoughnotthybetters),thouseest,canacttheirs.--Stealawayintodarkness!Noinquiryafterthiswillbemade,whosethefirstadvances,thineormine.'

And,asIhopetolive,thewench,confoundedlyfrightened,slunkaway;sodidhersentinelMabell;thoughI,endeavouringtorally,criedoutforDorcastostay--butIbelievethedevilcouldnothavestopther,whenanangelbidherbegone.

Madam,saidI,letmetellyou;andwasadvancingtowardsherwithafierceaspect,mostcursedlyvexed,andashamedtoo----

Butsheturnedtome:'Stopwherethouart,Ovilestandmostabandonedofmen!--Stopwherethouart!--nor,withthatdeterminedface,offertotouchme,ifthouwouldstnotthatIshouldbeacorpsatthyfeet!'

Tomyastonishment,sheheldforthapenknifeinherhand,thepointto

herownbosom,graspingresolutelythewholehandle,sothattherewasnoofferingtotakeitfromher.

'Ioffernotmischieftoanybodybutmyself.You,Sir,andyewomen,aresafefromeveryviolenceofmine.TheLAWshallbeallmyresource:theLAW,'andshespokethewordwithemphasis,theLAW!thattosuchpeoplecarriesnaturalterrorwithit,andnowstruckapanicintothem.

Nowonder,sincethosewhowilldamnthemselvestoprocureeaseandplentyinthisworld,willtrembleateverythingthatseemstothreatentheirmethodsofobtainingthateaseandplenty.----

'TheLAWonlyshallbemyrefuge!'----

Theinfamousmotherwhisperedme,thatitwerebettertomaketermswiththisstrangelady,andlethergo.

Sally,notwithstandingallherimpudentbraveryatothertimes,said,IfMr.Lovelacehadtoldthemwhatwasnottrue,ofherbeinghiswife----

AndPollyHorton,Thatshemustneedssay,thelady,ifshewerenotmywife,hadbeenverymuchinjured;thatwasall.

Thatisnotnowamattertobedisputed,criedI:youandIknow,Madam----

'Wedo,saidshe;andIthankGod,Iamnotthine--oncemoreIthankGodforit--Ihavenodoubtofthefartherbasenessthatthouhastintendedme,bythisvileandlowtrick:butIhavemySENSES,Lovelace:andfrommyheartIdespisethee,thouverypoorLovelace!--Howcanstthoustandinmypresence!--Thou,that'----

Madam,Madam,Madam--theseareinsultsnottobeborne--andwasapproachingher.

Shewithdrewtothedoor,andsetherbackagainstit,holdingthe



pointedknifetoherheavingbosom;whilethewomenheldme,beseechingmenottoprovoketheviolentlady--fortheirhousesake,andbecurs'dtothem,theybesoughtme--andallthreehunguponme--whilethetrulyheroicladybravedmeatthatdistance:

'Approachme,Lovelace,withresentment,ifthouwilt.Idaredie.Itisindefenceofmyhonour.Godwillbemercifultomypoorsoul!Iexpectnomoremercyfromthee!Ihavegainedthisdistance,andtwostepsnearerme,andthoushaltseewhatIdaredo!'----

Leaveme,women,tomyself,andtomyangel!--[Theyretiredatadistance.]--Omybelovedcreature,howyouterrifyme!Holdingoutmyarms,andkneelingononeknee--notastep,notastepfarther,excepttoreceivemydeathatthatinjuredhandwhichisthusheldupagainstalifefardearertomethanmyown!Iamavillain!theblackestofvillains!--Sayyouwillsheathyourknifeintheinjurer's,nottheinjured'sheart,andthenwillIindeedapproachyou,butnotelse.

Themothertwangedherd--n'dnose;andSallyandPollypulledouttheirhandkerchiefs,andturnedfromus.Theyneverintheirlives,theytoldmeafterwards,beheldsuchascene----

Innocencesotriumphant:villanysodebased,theymustmean!

Unawarestomyself,Ihadmovedonwardtomyangel--'Anddostthou,dostthou,stilldisclaiming,stilladvancing--dostthou,dostthou,stillinsidiouslymovetowardsme?'--[Andherhandwasextended]'Idare--Idare--notrashlyneither--myheartfromprincipleabhorstheact,whichthoumakestnecessary!--God,inthymercy![liftinguphereyesandhands]God,inthymercy!'

Ithrewmyselftothefartherendoftheroom.Anejaculation,asilentejaculation,employingherthoughtsthatmoment;Pollysaysthewhitesofherlovelyeyeswereonlyvisible:and,intheinstantthatsheextendedherhand,assuredlytostrikethefatalblow,[howtheveryrecitalterrifiesme!]shecasthereyetowardsme,andsawmeattheutmostdistancetheroomwouldallow,andheardmybrokenvoice--myvoicewas

utterlybroken;norknewIwhatIsaid,orwhethertothepurposeornot--andhercharmingcheeks,thatwereallinaglowbefore,turnedpale,asifterrifiedatherownpurpose;andliftinguphereyes--'ThankGod!--thankGod!saidtheangel--deliveredforthepresent;forthepresentdelivered--frommyself--keep,Sir,thatdistance;'[lookingdowntowardsme,whowasprostrateonthefloor,myheartpierced,aswithanhundreddaggers;]'thatdistancehassavedalife;towhatreserved,theAlmightyonlyknows!'--

Tobehappy,Madam;andtomakehappy!--And,Oletmehopeforyourfavourforto-morrow--Iwillputoffmyjourneytillthen--andmayGod--

Swearnot,Sir!--withanawfulandpiercingaspect--youhavetoooften

sworn!--God'seyeisuponus!--Hismoreimmediateeye;andlookedwildly.--Butthewomenlookeduptotheceiling,asifafraidofGod'seye,andtrembled.Andwelltheymight,andItoo,whosoverylatelyhadeachofusthedevilinourhearts.

Ifnotto-morrow,Madam,saybutnextThursday,youruncle'sbirth-day;saybutnextThursday!

'ThisIsay,ofthisyoumayassureyourself,Inever,neverwillbeyour's.--Andletmehope,thatImaybeentitledtotheperformanceof



yourpromise,tobepermittedtoleavethisinnocenthouse,asonecalledit,(butlonghavemyearsbeenaccustomedtosuchinversionsofwords),assoonasthedaybreaks.'

Didmyperditiondependuponit,thatyoucannot,Madam,butuponterms.AndIhopeyouwillnotterrifyme--stilldreadingtheaccursedknife.

'Nothinglessthananattemptuponmyhonourshallmakemedesperate.Ihavenoviewbuttodefendmyhonour:withsuchaviewonlyIenteredintotreatywithyourinfamousagentbelow.Theresolutionyouhaveseen,Itrust,Godwillgivemeagain,uponthesameoccasion.Butforaless,Iwishnotforit.--Onlytakenotice,women,thatIamnowifeofthisman:baselyashehasusedme,Iamnothiswife.Hehasnoauthorityoverme.Ifhegoawayby-and-by,andyouactbyhisauthoritytodetainme,looktoit.'

Then,takingoneofthelights,sheturnedfromus;andawayshewent,unmolested.--Notasoulwasabletomolesther.

Mabellsawher,tremblingly,andinahurry,takethekeyofherchamber-dooroutofherpocket,andunlockit;and,assoonassheentered,heardherdouble-lock,bar,andboltit.

Byhertakingoutherkey,whenshecameoutofherchambertous,sheno

doubtsuspectedmydesign:whichwas,tohavecarriedherinmyarmsthither,ifshemadesuchforcenecessary,afterIhadintimidatedher;andtohavebeenhercompanionforthatnight.

Shewastohavehadseveralbedchamber-womentoassisttoundressheruponoccasion:butfromthemomentsheenteredthedining-roomwithsomuchintrepidity,itwasabsolutelyimpossibletothinkofprosecutingmyvillanousdesignsagainsther.

***

This,this,Belford,wasthehandImadeofacontrivancefromwhichIexpectedsomuch!--AndnowIamtentimesworseoffthanbefore.

Thouneversawestpeopleinthylifelooksolikefoolsupononeanother,asthemother,herpartners,andI,did,forafewminutes.Andatlast,thetwodevilishnymphsbrokeoutintoinsultingridiculeuponme;whiletheoldwretchwasconcernedforherhouse,thereputationofherhouse.Icursedthemalltogether;and,retiringtomychamber,lockedmyselfin.

Andnowitistimetosetout:allIhavegained,detection,disgrace,freshguiltbyrepeatedperjuries,andtobedespisedbyherIdoatupon;and,whatisstillworsetoaproudheart,bymyself.

Success,successinprojects,iseverything.WhatanadmirablecontriverdidIthinkmyselftillnow!Evenforthisschemeamongtherest!Buthowpitifullyfoolishdoesitnowappeartome!--Scratchout,erase,nevertoberead,everypartofmyprecedingletters,whereIhaveboastinglymentionedit.Andneverpresumetorallymeuponthecursedsubject:forIcannotbearit.

Butforthelady,bymysoul,Iloveher.Iadmirehermorethanever!Imusthaveher.Iwillhaveherstill--withhonourorwithout,asI



haveoftenvowed.Mycursedfrightatheraccidentalbloodynose,solately,putheruponimprovinguponmethus.HadshethreatenedME,Ishouldhavesoonbeenmasterofonearm,andinboth!Butforsosincereavirtuetothreatenherself,andnottooffertointimidateanyother,andwithsomuchpresenceofmind,astodistinguish,intheverypassionateintention,thenecessityoftheact,defenceofherhonour,andsofairlytodisavowlesseroccasions:showedsuchadeliberation,suchachoice,suchaprinciple;andthenkeepingmesowatchfullyatadistancethatIcouldnotseizeherhand,sosoonasshecouldhavegiventhefatalblow;howimpossiblenottobesubduedbysotrueandsodiscreetamagnanimity!

Butsheisnotgone.Sheshallnotgo.IwillpressherwithlettersfortheThursday.Sheshallyetbemine,legallymine.For,astocohabitation,thereisnosuchthingtobethoughtof.

TheCaptainshallgiveheraway,asproxyforheruncle.MyLordwilldie.Myfortunewillhelpmywill,andsetmeaboveeverythingandeverybody.

Buthereisthecurse--shedespisesme,Jack!--Whatman,asIhaveheretoforesaid,canbeartobedespised--especiallybyhiswife!--OLord!--OLord!Whatahand,whatacursedhand,haveImadeofthisplot!--Andhereends

Thehistoryoftheladyandthepenknife!--Thedeviltakethepenknife!--Itgoesagainstmetosay,

Godblessthelady!

NEAR5,SAT.MORN.

LETTERXXXVII

MR.LOVELACE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE

[SUPERSCRIBEDTOMRS.LOVELACE.]M.HALL,SAT.NIGHT,JUNE24.

MYDEARESTLIFE,

Ifyoudonotimputetolive,andtoterrorraisedbylove,thepoorfigureImadebeforeyoulastnight,youwillnotdomejustice.IthoughtIwouldtrytotheverylastmoment,if,bycomplyingwithyouineverything,IcouldprevailuponyoutopromisetobemineonThursdaynext,sinceyourefusedmeanearlierday.CouldIhavebeensohappy,youhadnotbeenhinderedgoingtoHampstead,orwhereverelseyoupleased.ButwhenIcouldnotprevailuponyoutogivemethis

assurance,whatroomhadI,(mydemeritsogreat,)tosuppose,thatyourgoingthitherwouldnotbetoloseyouforever?

Iwillowntoyou,Madam,thatyesterdayafternoonIpickedupthepaperdroptbyDorcas;whohasconfessedthatshewouldhaveassistedyouingettingaway,ifshehadhadopportunitysotodo;andundoubtedlydroppeditbyaccident.AndcouldIhaveprevaileduponyouastoThursdaynext,Iwouldhavemadenouseofit;secureasIshouldhavebeeninyourwordgiven,tobemine.ButwhenIfoundyouinflexible,Iwasresolvedtotry,if,byresentingDorcas'streachery,Icouldnot



makeyourpardonofmetheconditionofminetoher:andifnot,tomakeahandleofittorevokemyconsenttoyourgoingawayfromMrs.Sinclair's;sincetheconsequenceofthatmusthavebeensofataltome.

Sofar,indeed,wasmyproceedinglowandartful:andwhenIwaschallengedwithit,assuch,insohighandnobleamanner,Icouldnotavoidtakingshametomyselfuponit.

Butyoumustpermitme,Madam,tohope,thatyouwillnotpunishmetooheavilyforsopooracontrivance,sincenodishonourwasmeantyou:andsince,inthemomentofitsexecution,youhadasgreataninstanceofmyincapacitytodefendawrong,alowmeasure,and,atthesametime,inyourpoweroverme,asmortalmancouldgive--inaword,sinceyoumusthaveseen,thatIwasabsolutelyunderthecontroulbothofconscienceandoflove.

Iwillnotoffertodefendmyself,forwishingyoutoremainwhereyouare,tilleitheryougivemeyourwordtomeetmeatthealtaronThursday;ortillIhavethehonourofattendingyou,preparativetothesolemnitywhichwillmakethatdaythehappiestofmylife.

Iambuttoosensible,thatthiskindoftreatmentmayappeartoyouwiththefaceofanarbitraryandillegalimposition:butastheconsequences,notonlytoourselves,buttobothourfamilies,maybefatal,ifyou

cannotbemovedinmyfavour;letmebeseechyoutoforgivethisactofcompulsion,onthescoreofthenecessityyouyourdearselfhavelaidmeundertobeguiltyofit;andtopermitthesolemnityofnextThursdaytoincludeanactofoblivionforallpastoffences.

TheordersIhavegiventothepeopleofthehouseare:'ThatyoushallbeobeyedineveryparticularthatisconsistentwithmyexpectationsoffindingyouthereonmyreturnonWednesdaynext:thatMrs.Sinclairandhernieces,havingincurredyourjustdispleasure,shallnot,withoutyourorders,comeintoyourpresence:thatneithershallDorcas,tillshehasfullyclearedherconducttoyoursatisfaction,bepermittedtoattendyou:butMabell,inherplace;ofwhomyouseemedsometimeagotoexpresssomeliking.Will.Ihaveleftbehindmetoattendyour

commands.Ifhebeeithernegligentorimpertinent,yourdismissionshallbeadismissionofhimfrommyserviceforever.But,astoletterswhichmaybesentyou,oranywhichyoumayhavetosend,Imusthumblyentreat,thatnonesuchpassfromortoyou,forthefewdaysthatIshallbeabsent.'ButIdoassureyou,madam,thatthesealsofbothsortsshallbesacred:andtheletters,ifsuchbesent,shallbegivenintoyourownhandsthemomenttheceremonyisperformed,orbefore,ifyourequireit.

MeantimeIwillinquire,andsendyouword,howMissHowedoes;andtowhat,ifIcanbeinformed,herlongsilenceisowing.

Dr.PerkinsIfoundhere,attendingmyLord,whenIarrivedwithDr.S.

Heacquaintsmethatyourfather,mother,uncles,andthestilllessworthypersonsofyourfamily,arewell;andintendtobeallatyouruncleHarlowe'snextweek;Ipresume,withintenttokeephisanniversary.Thiscanmakenoalteration,butahappyone,astopersons,onThursday;becauseMr.Tomlinsonassuredme,thatifanythingfellouttohinderyouruncle'scomingupinperson,(which,however,hedidnotthenexpect,)hewouldbesatisfiedifhisfriendtheCaptainwereproxyforhim.Ishallsendamanandhorseto-morrowtotheCaptain,tobeatgreatercertainty.



Isendthisbyaspecialmessenger,whowillwaityourpleasureinrelationtotheimpatiently-wished-forThursday:whichIhumblyhopewillbesignifiedbyaline.

MyLord,thoughhardlysensible,andunmindfulofeverythingbutofyourfelicity,desireshismostaffectionatecomplimentstoyou.Hehasinreadinesstopresenttoyouaveryvaluablesetofjewels,whichhehopeswillbeacceptable,whetherhelivestoseeyouadornthemornot.

LadySarahandLadyBettyhavealsotheirtokensofrespectreadytocourtyouracceptance:butmayHeaveninclineyoutogivetheopportunityofreceivingtheirpersonalcompliments,andthoseofmycousinsMontague,beforethenextweekbeout!

HisLordshipisexceedingill.Dr.S.hasnohopesofhim.TheonlyconsolationIcanhaveforthedeathofarelationwholovesmesowell,ifhedodie,mustarisefromtheadditionalpoweritwillputintomyhandsofshowinghowmuchIam,

Mydearestlife,Yourever-affectionate,faithful,LOVELACE.

LETTERXXXVIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[SUPERSCRIBEDTOMRS.LOVELACE.]M.HALL,SUNDAYNIGHT,JUNE25.

MYDEARESTLOVE,

IcannotfindwordstoexpresshowmuchIammortifiedatthereturnofmymessengerwithoutalinefromyou.

Thursdayissonear,thatIwillsendmessengeraftermessengereveryfourhours,tillIhaveafavourableanswer;theonetomeettheother,tillitsevearrives,toknowifImayventuretoappearinyourpresencewiththehopeofhavingmywishesansweredonthatday.

Yourlove,Madam,Ineitherexpect,noraskfor;norwill,tillmyfuturebehaviourgivesyoucausetothinkIdeserveit.AllIatpresentpresumetowishis,tohaveitinmypowertodoyouallthejusticeIcannowdoyou:andtoyourgenerositywillIleaveit,torewardme,asIshallmerit,withyouraffection.

Atpresent,revolvingmypoorbehaviourofFridaynightbeforeyou,IthinkIshouldsoonerchoosetogotomylastaudit,unpreparedforitas

Iam,thantoappearinyourpresence,unlessyougivemesomehope,thatIshallbereceivedasyourelectedhusband,ratherthan,(howeverdeserved,)asadetestedcriminal.

Letme,therefore,proposeanexpedient,inordertosparemyownconfusion;andtospareyouthenecessityforthatsoul-harrowingrecrimination,whichIcannotstand,andwhichmustbedisagreeabletoyourself--tonamethechurch,andIwillhaveeverythinginreadiness;sothatournextinterviewwillbe,inamanner,attheveryaltar;andthenyouwillhavethekindhusbandtoforgiveforthefaultsofthe



ungratefullover.Ifyourresentmentbestilltoohightowritemore,letitonlybeinyourowndearhand,thesewords,St.Martin'schurch,Thursday--orthese,St.Giles'schurch,Thursday;norwillIinsistuponanyinscriptionorsubscription,orsomuchastheinitialsofyourname.ThisshallbeallthefavourIwillexpect,tillthedearhanditselfisgiventomine,inpresenceofthatBeingwhomIinvokeasawitnessoftheinviolablefaithandhonourof

YouradoringLOVELACE.

LETTERXXXIX

MR.LOVELACE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[SUPERSCRIBEDTOMRS.LOVELACE.]M.HALL,MONDAY,JUNE26.

Oncemore,mydearestlove,doIconjureyoutosendmethefourrequestedwords.Thereisnotimetobelost.AndIwouldnothavenextThursdaygoover,withoutbeingentitledtocallyoumine,fortheworld;andthataswellforyoursakeasformyown.Hithertoallthathas

passedisbetweenyouandmeonly;but,afterThursday,ifmywishesareunanswered,thewholewillbebeforetheworld.

MyLordisextremelyill,andenduresnottohavemeoutofhissightforonehalfhour.Butthisshallnothavetheleastweightwithme,ifyoubepleasedtoholdouttheolive-branchtomeinthefourrequestedwords.

IhavethefollowingintelligencefromCaptainTomlinson.

'AllyourfamilyareatyouruncleHarlowe's.Yourunclefindshecannotgoup;andnamesCaptainTomlinsonforhisproxy.HeproposestokeepallyourfamilywithhimtilltheCaptainassureshimthattheceremony

isover.

'Alreadyhehasbegun,withhopeofsuccess,totrytoreconcileyourmothertoyou.'

MyLordM.butjustnowhastoldmehowhappyheshouldthinkhimselftohaveanopportunity,beforehedies,tosaluteyouashisniece.Ihaveputhiminhopesthatheshallseeyou;andhavetoldhimthatIwillgototownonWednesday,inordertoprevailuponyoutoaccompanymedownonThursdayorFriday.Ihaveorderedasettobeinreadinesstocarrymeup;and,werenotmyLordsoveryill,mycousinMontaguetellsmethatshewouldofferherattendanceonyou.Ifyouplease,therefore,wecansetoutforthisplacethemomentthesolemnityisperformed.

Donot,dearestcreature,dissipateallthosepromisingappearances,andbyrefusingtosaveyourownandyourfamily'sreputationintheeyeoftheworld,useyourselfworsethantheungratefullestwretchonearthhasusedyou.Forifweweremarried,allthedisgraceyouimagineyouhavesufferedwhileasinglelady,willbemyown,andonlyknowntoourselves.

Oncemore,then,considerwellthesituationwearebothin;andremember,mydearestlife,thatThursdaywillbesoonhere;andthatyou



havenotimetolose.

InalettersentbythemessengerwhomIdispatchwiththis,Ihavedesiredthatmyfriend,Mr.Belford,whoisyourverygreatadmirer,andwhoknowsallthesecretsofmyheart,willwaituponyou,toknowwhatIamtodependuponastothechosenday.

Surely,mydear,younevercould,atanytime,sufferhalfsomuchfromcruelsuspense,asIdo.

IfIhavenotananswertothis,eitherfromyourowngoodness,orthroughMr.Belford'sintercession,itwillbetoolateformetosetout:andCaptainTomlinsonwillbedisappointed,whogoestotownonpurposetoattendyourpleasure.

OnemotiveforthegentleresistanceIhavepresumedtolayyouunderis,topreventthemischiefsthatmightensue(asprobablytothemoreinnocent,astotheless)wereyoutowritetoanybodywhileyourpassionsweresomuchraisedandinflamedagainstme.Havingapprizedyouofmydirectiontothewomenintownonthishead,IwonderyoushouldhaveendeavouredtosendalettertoMissHowe,althoughinacoverdirectedtothatyounglady's*servant;asyoumustthinkitwouldbelikelytofallintomyhands.

*Theladyhadmadeanattempttosendawayaletter.

ThejustsenseofwhatIhavedeservedthecontentsshouldbe,leavesmenoroomtodoubtwhattheyare.Nevertheless,Ireturnityouenclosed,withtheseal,asyouwillsee,unbroken.

Relieve,Ibeseechyou,dearestMadam,bythefourrequestedwords,orbyMr.Belford,theanxietyof

Yourever-affectionateandobligedLOVELACE.

Remember,therewillnot,therecannotbetimeforfurtherwriting,andforcomingupbyThursday,youruncle'sbirth-day.

LETTERXL

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.MONDAY,JUNE26.

ThouwiltseethesituationIaminwithMissHarlowebytheenclosed

copiesofthreeletters;totwoofwhichIamsomuchscornedasnottohaveonewordgivenmeinanswer;andofthethird(nowsentbythemessengerwhobringstheethis)Iamafraidaslittlenoticewillbetaken--andifso,herdayofgraceisabsolutelyover.

Onewouldimagine(solongusedtoconstrainttooasshehasbeen)thatshemighthavebeensatisfiedwiththetriumphshehadoverusallonFridaynight!atriumphthattothishourhassunkmyprideandmyvanitysomuch,thatIalmosthatethewords,plot,contrivance,scheme;andshallmistrustmyselfinfutureforeveryonethatrisestomyinventive



head.

ButseestthounotthatIamunderanecessitytocontinueheratSinclair'sandtoprohibitallhercorrespondencies?

Now,Belford,asIreally,inmypresentmood,thinkofnothinglessthanmarryingher,ifsheletnotThursdayslip,Iwouldhavetheeattendher,inpursuanceoftheintimationIhavegivenherinmyletterofthisdate;andvowforme,swearforme,bindthysoultoherformyhonour,andusewhatargumentsthyfriendlyheartcansuggest,inordertoprocuremeananswerfromher;which,asthouwiltsee,shemaygiveinfourwordsonly.AndthenIpurposetoleaveLordM.(dangerouslyillasheis,)andmeetheratherappointedchurch,inordertosolemnize.IfshewillbutsignCl.H.tothywritingthefourwords,thatshalldo:forIwouldnotcomeuptobemadeafoolofinthefaceofallmyfamilyandfriends.

Ifsheshouldletthedaygooff,Ishallbedesperate.Iamentangledinmyowndevices,andcannotbearthatsheshoulddetectme.

OthatIhadbeenhonest!--Whatadevilareallmyplotscometo!Whatdotheyendin,butonegrandplotuponmyself,andatitletoeternalinfamyanddisgrace!But,dependingonthyfriendlyoffices,Iwillsaynomoreofthis.--Lethersendmebutoneline!--Butoneline!--Totreat

measunworthyofhernotice;--yetbealtogetherinmypower--Icannot--Iwillnotbearthat.

MyLord,asIsaid,isextremelyill.Thedoctorsgivehimover.Hegiveshimselfover.Thosewhowouldnothavehimdie,areafraidhewilldie.Butastomyself,Iamdoubtful:fortheselongandviolentstrugglesbetweentheconstitutionandthedisease(thoughthelatterhasthreephysiciansandanapothecarytohelpitforward,andallthree,astotheirprescriptions,ofdifferentopinionstoo)indicateaplaguyhabit,andsavourmoreofrecoverythandeath:andthemoreso,ashehasnosharporacutementalorganstowhetouthisbodilyones,andtoraisehisfeverabovethesympathetichelpfulone.

ThouwiltseeintheenclosedwhatpainsIamattodispatchmessengers;whoareconstantlyontheroadtomeeteachother,andoneofthemtolinkinthechainwiththefourth,whosestationisinLondon,andfivemilesonwards,ortillmet.ButintruthIhavesomeothermattersforthemtoperformatthesametime,withmyLord'sbankerandhislawyer;whichwillenableme,ifhisLordshipissogoodastodiethisbout,tobeanovermatchforsomeofmyotherrelations.Idon'tmeanCharlotteandPatty;fortheyarenoblegirls:butothers,whohavebeenscratchingandclawingunder-groundlikesomanymolesinmyabsence;andwhoseworkingsIhavediscoveredsinceIhavebeendown,bythelittleheapsofdirttheyhavethrownup.

Aspeedyaccountofthycommission,dearJack!Thelettertravelsall

night.

LETTERXLI

MR.BELFORD,TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.LONDON,JUNE27.TUESDAY.



Youmustexcuseme,Lovelace,fromengagingintheofficeyouwouldhavemeundertake,tillIcanbebetterassuredyoureallyintendhonourablyatlastbythismuch-injuredlady.

IbelieveyouknowyourfriendBelfordtoowelltothinkhewouldbeeasywithyou,orwithanymanalive,whoshouldseektomakehimpromiseforhimwhatheneverintendedtoperform.Andletmetellthee,thatIhavenotmuchconfidenceinthehonourofaman,whybyimitationofhands(Iwillonlycallit)hasshownsolittleregardtothehonourofhisownrelations.

Onlythatthouhastsuchjesuiticalqualifyings,orIshouldthinktheeatlasttouchedwithremorse,andbroughtwithinviewofbeingashamedofthycursedinventionsbytheillsuccessofthylast:whichIheartilycongratulatetheeupon.

Othedivinelady!--ButIwillnotaggravate!

Nevertheless,whenthouwritestthat,inthypresentmood,thouthinkestofmarrying,andyetcanstsoeasilychangethymood;whenIknowthyheartisagainstthestate:thatthefourwordsthoucourtestfromtheladyareasmuchtothypurpose,asifshewroteforty;sinceitwillshowshecanforgivethehighestinjurythatcanbeofferedtowoman;andwhenIrecollecthoweasilythoucanstfindexcusestopostpone;thou

mustbemoreexplicitagooddeal,astothyrealintentions,andfuturehonour,thanthouart:forIcannottrusttotemporaryremorse;whichbroughtonbydisappointmenttoo,andnotbyprinciple,andthelikeofwhichthouhastsooftengotover.

Ifthoucanstconvincemetimeenoughfortheday,thatthoumeanesttodohonourablybyher,inherownsenseoftheword;or,ifnottimeenough,wiltfixsomeotherday,(whichthououghtesttoleavetoheroption,andnotbindherdownfortheThursday;andtherather,asthypretenceforsodoingisfoundedonanabsolutefiction;)Iwillthenmostcheerfullyundertakethycause;byperson,ifshewilladmitmetoherpresence;ifshewillnot,bypen.But,inthiscase,thoumustallowmetobeguaranteeforthyfamily.And,ifso,somuchasIvalue

thee,andrespectthyskillinallthequalificationsofagentleman,thoumayestdependuponit,thatIwillactuptothecharacterofaguarantee,withmorehonourthantheprincesofourdayusuallydo----totheirshamebeitspoken.

Meantimeletmetellthee,thatmyheartbleedsforthewrongthisangelicladyhasreceived:andifthoudostnotmarryher,ifshewillhavethee,and,whenmarried,makeherthebestandtenderestofhusbands,Iwouldratherbeadog,amonkey,abear,aviper,oratoad,thanthee.

Commandmewithhonour,andthoushaltfindnonereadiertoobligetheethan

Thysincerefriend,JOHNBELFORD.

LETTERXLII

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.M.HALL,JUNE27.TUESDAYNIGHT,NEAR12.



Your'sreachedmethismoment,byanextraordinarypushinthemessengers.

Whatamanofhonourthouofasudden!----

Andso,intheimaginaryshapeofaguarantee,thouthreatenestme!

HadInotbeeninearnestastothelady,Ishouldnothaveofferedtoemploytheeintheaffair.But,letmesay,thathadstthouundertakenthetask,andIhadstafterwardsthoughtfittochangemymind,Ishouldhavecontentedmyselftotellthee,thatthatwasmymindwhenthouengagedstforme,andtohavegiventheethereasonsforthechange,andthenlefttheetothyowndiscretion:forneverknewIwhatfearofmanwas--norfearofwomanneither,tillIbecameacquaintedwithMissClarissaHarlowe,nay,whatismostsurprising,tillIcametohaveherinmypower.

Andsothouwiltnotwaituponthecharmerofmyheart,butupontermsandconditions!--Letitaloneandbecurs'd;Icarenot.--ButsomuchcreditdidIgivetothevaluethouexpressedstforher,thatIthoughttheofficewouldhavebeenacceptabletothee,asserviceabletome;forwhatwasit,buttoendeavourtopersuadehertoconsenttothe

reparationofherownhonour?ForwhathaveIdonebutdisgracedmyself,andbeenathieftomyownjoys?--Andiftherebeaunionofhearts,andanintentiontosolemnize,whatistherewantingbutthefoolishceremony?--andthatIstilloffer.But,ifshewillkeepbackherhand,ifshewillmakemeholdoutmineinvain,howcanIhelpit?

Iwriteheronemoreletter;andif,aftershehasreceivedthat,shekeepssullensilence,shemustthankherselfforwhatistofollow.

But,afterall,,myheartisnotwhollyher's.Iloveherbeyondexpression;andcannothelpit.IhopethereforeshewillreceivethislasttenderasIwish.Ihopesheintendsnot,likeatruewoman,toplague,andvex,andteaseme,nowshehasfoundherpower.Ifshewill

takemetomercynowtheseremorsesareuponme,(thoughIscorntoconditionwiththeeformysincerity,)allhertrials,asIhaveheretoforedeclared,shallbeover,andsheshallbeashappyasIcanmakeher:for,ruminatinguponallthathaspassedbetweenus,fromthefirsthourofouracquaintancetillthepresent,Imustpronounce,ThatsheisvirtueitselfandoncemoreIsay,hasnoequal.

Astowhatyouhint,ofleavingtoherchoiceanotherday,doyouconsider,thatitwillbeimpossiblethatmycontrivancesandstratagemsshouldbemuchlongerconcealed?--Thismakesmepressthatday,thoughsonear;andthemore,asIhavemadesomuchadoaboutheruncle'sanniversary.Ifshesendmethefourwords,Iwillsparenofatiguetobeintime,ifnotforthecanonicalhouratchurch,forsomeotherhour

ofthedayinherownapartment,oranyother:formoneywilldoeverything:andthatIhaveneversparedinthisaffair.

Toshowthee,thatIamnotatenmitywiththee,Ienclosethecopiesoftwoletters--onetoher:itisthefourth,andmustbethelastonthesubject----TheothertoCaptainTomlinson;calculated,asthouwiltsee,forhimtoshowher.

Andnow,Jack,interfere;inthiscaseornot,thouknowestthemindof



R.LOVELACE.

LETTERXLIII

MR.LOVELACE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[SUPERSCRIBEDTOMRS.LOVELACE.]M.HALL,WED.MORNING,ONEO'CLOCK,JUNE28.

Notoneline,mydearestlife,notoneword,inanswertothreelettersIhavewritten!Thetimeisnowsoshort,thatthismustbethelastletterthatcanreachyouonthissidetheimportanthourthatmightmakeuslegallyone.

Myfriend,Mr.Belford,isapprehensive,thathecannotwaituponyouintime,byreasonofsomeurgentaffairsofhisown.

Ithelessregretthedisappointment,becauseIhaveprocuredamoreacceptableperson,asIhope,toattendyou;CaptainTomlinsonImean:towhomIhadappliedforthispurpose,beforeIhadMr.Belford'sanswer.

Iwasthemoresolicitoustoobtainhisfavourformhim,becauseoftheofficeheistotakeuponhim,asIhumblypresumetohope,to-morrow.Thatofficeobligedhimtobeintownasthisday:andIacquaintedhimwithmyunhappysituationwithyou;anddesiredthathewouldshowme,onthisoccasion,thatIhadasmuchofhisfavourandfriendshipasyourunclehad;sincethewholetreatymustbebrokenoff,ifhecouldnotprevailuponyouinmybehalf.

Hewilldispatchthemessengerdirectly;whomIproposetomeetinpersonatSlough;eithertoproceedonwardtoLondonwithajoyfulheart,ortoreturnbacktoM.Hallwithabrokenone.

Ioughtnot(butcannothelpit)toanticipatethepleasureMr.Tomlinson

proposestohimself,inacquaintingyouwiththelikelihoodthereisofyourmother'ssecondingyouruncle'sviews.For,itseems,hehasprivatelycommunicatedtoherhislaudableintentions:andherresolutiondepends,aswellashis,uponwhatto-morrowwillproduce.

Disappointnotthen,Ibeseechyou,foranhundredpersons'sakes,aswellasformine,thatuncleandthatmother,whosedispleasureIhaveheardyousooftendeplore.

YoumaythinkitimpossibleformetoreachLondonbythecanonicalhour.Ifitshould,theceremonymaybeperformedinyourownapartments,atanytimeintheday,oratnight:sothatCaptainTomlinsonmayhaveittoavertoyouruncle,thatitwasperformedonhisanniversary.

TellbuttheCaptain,thatyouforbidmenottoattendyou:andthatshallbesufficientforbringingtoyou,onthewingsoflove,

Yourever-gratefulandaffectionateLOVELACE.

LETTERXLIV



TOMR.PATRICKM'DONALD,ATHISLODGINGS,ATMR.BROWN'S,PERUKE-MAKER,INST.MARTIN'SLANE,WESTMINSTERM.HALL,WEDN.MORNING,TWOO'CLOCK.

DEARM'DONALD,

Thebearerofthishasalettertocarrytothelady.*Ihavebeenatthetroubleofwritingacopyofit:whichIenclose,thatyoumaynotmistakeyourcue.

*SeetheprecedingLetter.

Youwilljudgeofmyreasonsforante-datingtheenclosedsealedone,*directedtoyoubythenameofTomlinson;whichyouaretoshowtothelady,asinconfidence.Youwillopenitofcourse.

*SeethenextLetter.

Idoubtnotyourdexterityandmanagement,dearM'Donald;noryourzeal;especiallyasthehopeofcohabitationmustnowbegivenup.Impossibletobecarriedisthatscheme.Imightbreakherheart,butnotinclineherwill--aminearnestthereforetomarryher,ifsheletnotthedayslip.

Improveuponthehintofhermother.Thatmaytouchher.ButJohnHarlowe,remember,hasprivatelyengagedthatlady--privately,Isay;else,(nottomentionthereasonforheruncleHarlowe'sformerexpedient,)youknow,shemightfindmeanstogetaletterawaytotheoneortotheother,toknowthetruth;ortoMissHowe,toengagehertoinquireintoit:and,ifsheshould,thewordprivatelywillaccountfortheuncle'sandmother'sdenyingit.

However,failnot,asfromme,tochargeourmotherandhernymphstoredoubletheirvigilancebothastoherpersonandletters.All'suponacrisisnow.Butshemustnotbetreatedillneither.

Thursdayover,Ishallknowwhattoresolveupon.

Ifnecessary,youmustassumeauthority.Thedevil'sin't,ifsuchagirlasthisshallaweamanofyouryearsandexperience.YouarenotinlovewithherasIam.Flyout,ifshedoubtyourhonour.Spiritsnaturallysoftmaybebeatoutoftheirplayandbornedown(thougheversomuchraised)byhigheranger.Allwomenarecowardsatbottom;onlyviolentwheretheymay.Ihaveoftenstormedagirloutofhermistrust,

andmadeheryield(beforesheknewwhereshewas)tothepointindignantlymistrusted;andthattomakeupwithme,thoughIwastheaggressor.

IfthismattersucceedasI'dhaveit,(orifnot,anddonotfailbyyourfault,)Iwilltakeyouoffthenecessityofpursuingyourcursedsmuggling;whichotherwisemayonedayendfatallyforyou.

Wearenoneofusperfect,M'Donald.Thissweetladymakesmeserioussometimesinspiteofmyheart.Butasprivatevicesarelessblamable



thanpublic;anasIthinksmuggling(asitiscalled)anationalevil;Ihavenodoubttopronounceyouamuchworsemanthanmyself,andassuchshalltakepleasureinreformingyou.

Isendyouenclosedtenguineas,asasmallearnestoffurtherfavours.Hithertoyouhavebeenaverycleverfellow.

AstoclothesforThursday,Monmouth-streetwillaffordareadysupply.Clothesquitenewwouldmakeyourconditionsuspected.Butyoumaydeferthatcare,tillyouseeifshecanbeprevailedupon.Yourriding-dresswilldoforthefirstvisit.Norletyourbootsbeoverclean.Ihavealwaystoldyoutheconsequenceofattendingtotheminutiae,whereart(orimposture,astheill-manneredwouldcallit)isdesigned--yourlinenrumpledandsoily,whenyouwaituponher--easytermsthese--justcometotown--remember(asformerly)tololl,tothrowoutyourlegs,tostrokeandgraspdownyourruffles,asifofsignificanceenoughtobecareless.Whatthoughthepresenceofafineladywouldrequireadifferentbehaviour,areyounotofyearstodispensewithpoliteness?Youcanhavenodesignuponher,youknow.Youareafatheryourselfofdaughtersasoldasshe.Evermoreisparadeandobsequiousnesssuspectable:itmustshoweitherafoolishhead,oraknavishheart.Assumeairsofconsequencetherefore;andyouwillbetreatedasamanofconsequence.Ihaveoftenmorethanhalfruinedmyselfbymycomplaisance;and,beingafraidofcontroul,havebrought

controuluponmyself.IthinkIhavenomoretosayatpresent.IintendtobeatSlough,oronthewaytoit,asbyminetothelady.Adieu,honestM'Donald.

R.L.

LETTERXLV

TOCAPTAINTOMLINSON[ENCLOSEDINTHEPRECEDING;TOBESHOWNTOTHELADYASINCONFIDENCE.]

M.HALL,TUESDAYMORN.,JUNE27.

DEARCAPTAINTOMLINSON,

Anunhappymisunderstandinghasarisenbetweenthedearestladyintheworldandme(theparticularsofwhichsheperhapsmaygiveyou,butIwillnot,becauseImightbethoughtpartialtomyself;)andsherefusingtoanswermymostpressingandrespectfulletters;IamatamostperplexinguncertaintywhethershewillmeetusornotnextThursdaytosolemnize.

MyLordissoextremelyill,thatifIthoughtshewouldnotobligeme,

Iwoulddefergoinguptotownfortwoorthreedays.Hecaresnottohavemeoutofhissight:yetisimpatienttosalutemybelovedashisneice[sic]beforehedies.ThisIhavepromisedtogivehimanopportunitytodo:intending,ifthedearcreaturewillmakemehappy,tosetoutwithherforthisplacedirectlyfromchurch.

WithregretIspeakitofthecharmerofmysoul,thatirreconcilablenessisherfamily-fault--thelessexcusableindeedforher,assheherselfsuffersbyitinsohighadegreefromherownrelations.



Now,Sir,asyouintendedtobeintownsometimebeforeThursday,ifitbenottoogreataninconveniencetoyou,Icouldbegladyouwouldgoupassoonaspossible,formysake:andthisIthemoreboldlyrequest,asIpresumethatamanwhohassomanygreataffairsofhisowninhandasyouhave,wouldbegladtobeatacertaintyastotheday.

You,Sir,cansopatheticallyandjustlysetbeforehertheunhappyconsequencesthatwillfollowifthedaybepostponed,aswellwithregardtoheruncle'sdisappointment,astothepartyouhaveassuredmehermotheriswillingtotakeinthewished-forreconciliation,thatIhavegreathopesshewillsufferherselftobeprevailedupon.Andamanandhorseshallbeinwaitingtotakeyourdispatchesandbringthemtome.

Butifyoucannotprevailinmyfavour,youwillbepleasedtosatisfyyourfriend,Mr.JohnHarlowe,thatitisnotmyfaultthatheisnotobliged.Iam,dearSir,

Yourextremelyobligedandfaithfulservant,R.LOVELACE.

LETTERXLVI

TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.WEDN.JUNE28,NEARTWELVEO'CLOCK.

HONOUREDSIR,

Ireceivedyour's,asyourservantdesiredmetoacquaintyou,bytenthismorning.Horseandmanwereinafoam.

Iinstantlyequippedmyself,asifcomeofffromajourney,andposted

awaytothelady,intendingtopleadgreataffairsthatIcamenotbefore,inordertofavouryourantedate;andlikewisetobeinahurry,tohaveapretencetohurryherladyship,andtotakenodenialforhergivingasatisfactoryreturntoyourmessenger.But,uponmyenteringMrs.Sinclair'shouse,Ifoundallinthegreatestconsternation.

Youmustnot,Sir,besurprised.Itisatroubletometobetherelaterofthebadnews;butsoitis--Theladyisgoneoff!ShewasmissedbuthalfanhourbeforeIcame.

Herwaiting-maidisrunaway,orhithertoisnottobefound:sothattheyconcludeitwasbyherconnivance.

Theyhadsent,beforeIcame,tomyhonouredmastersMr.Belton,Mr.Mowbray,andMr.Belford.Mr.Tourvilleisoutoftown.

HighwordsarepassingbetweenMadamSinclair,andMadamHorton,andMadamMartin;asalsowithDorcas.AndyourservantWilliamthreatenstohangordrownhimself.

TheyhavesenttoknowiftheycanhearofMabell,thewaiting-maid,athermother's,whoitseemslivesinChick-lane,West-Smithfield;andtoanuncleofher'salso,whokeepsanalehouseatCow-cross,hadby,and



withwhomshelivedlast.

Yourmessengerhavingjustchangedhishorse,iscomeback:soIwillnotdetainhimlongerthantoadd,thatIam,withgreatconcernforthismisfortune,andthanksforyourseasonablefavourandkindintentionstowardsme--Iamsurethiswasnotmyfault--

HonouredSir,Yourmostobliged,humbleservant,PATRICKM'DONALD.

LETTERXLVII

MR.MOWBRAY,TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.WEDNESDAY,TWELVEO'CLOCK.

DEARLOVELACE,

Ihaveplaguynewstoacquainttheewith.MissHarloweisgoneoff!--Quitegone,bysoul!--Ihavenotimeforparticulars,yourservantbeinggoneoff.ButifIhad,wearenotyetcometothebottomofthematter.

Theladieshereareallblubberinglikedevills,accusingoneanothermostconfoundedly:whilstBeltonandIdamnthemalltogetherinthyname.

IfthoushouldsthearthatthyfellowWill.istakendeadoutofsomehorse-pond,andDorcascutdownfromherbed'steaster,fromdanglinginherowngarters,benotsurprised.Here'sthedeviltopay.NobodyserenebutJackBelford,whoistakingminutesofexaminations,accusations,andconfessions,withthesignificantairofaMiddlesexJustice;andintendstowriteatlargeallparticulars,Isuppose.

Iheartilycondolewiththee:sodoesBelton.Butitmayturnoutforthebest:forsheisgoneawaywiththymarks,Iunderstand.Afoolish

littledevill!Wherewillshemendherself?fornobodywilllookuponher.Andtheytellmethatthouwouldstcertainlyhavemarriedher,hadshestaid.ButIknowtheebetter.

DearBobby,adieu.IfLordM.willdienow,tocomforttheeforthisloss,whataseasonableexitwouldhemake!Let'shavealetterfromthee.Pr'ytheedo.Thoucan'stwritedevill-liketoBelford,whoshewsusnothingatall.Thineheartily,

RD.MOWBRAY.

LETTERXLVIII

MR.BELFORD,TOROBERTLOVELACE,ESQ.THURSDAY,JUNE29.

ThouhastheardfromM'DonaldandMowbraythenews.Badorgood,Iknownotwhichthou'ltdeemit.IonlywishIcouldhavegiventheejoyuponthesameaccount,beforetheunhappyladywasseducedfromHampstead;forthenofwhatanungratefulvillanyhadstthoubeensparedthe



perpetration,whichnowthouhasttoanswerfor!

Icametotownpurelytoservetheewithher,expectingthatthynextwouldsatisfymethatImightendeavouritwithoutdishonour.AndatfirstwhenIfoundhergone,Ihalfpitiedthee;fornowwiltthoubeinevitablyblownup:andinwhatanexecrablelightwiltthouappeartoalltheworld!--PoorLovelace!caughtinthyownsnares!thypunishmentisbutbeginning.

Buttomynarrative:forIsupposethouexpectestallparticularsfromme,sinceMowbrayhasinformedtheethatIhavebeencollectingthem.

'ThenobleexertionofspiritshehasmadeonFridaynight,had,itseems,greatlydisorderedher;insomuchthatshewasnotvisibletillSaturdayevening;whenMabellsawher;andsheseemedtobeveryill:butonSundaymorning,havingdressedherself,asifdesigningtogotochurch,sheorderedMabelltogetheracoachtothedoor.

'Thewenchtoldher,Shewastoobeyherineverythingbutthecallingofacoachorchair,orinrelationtoletters.

'ShesentforWill.andgavehimthesamecommand.

'Hepleadedhismaster'sorderstothecontrary,anddesiredtobe

excused.'Uponthis,downshewent,herself,andwouldhavegoneoutwithoutobservation;butfindingthestreet-doordouble-locked,andthekeynotinthelock,shesteptintothestreet-parlour,andwouldhavethrownupthesashtocallouttothepeoplepassingby,astheydoubtednot:butthat,sinceherlastattemptofthesamenature,hadbeenfasteneddown.

'HereuponsheresolutelysteptintoMrs.Sinclair'sparlourintheback-house;whereweretheolddevilandhertwopartners;anddemandedthekeyofthestreet-door,ortohaveitopenedforher.

'Theywereallsurprised;butdesiredtobeexcused,andpleadedyour

orders.

'Sheasserted,thatyouhadnoauthorityoverher;andnevershouldhaveany:thattheirpresentrefusalwastheirownactanddeed:shesawtheintentoftheirbackhouse,andthereasonofputtingherthere:shepleadedherconditionandfortune;andsaid,theyhadnowaytoavoidutterruin,butbyopeningtheirdoorstoher,orbymurderingher,andburyingherintheirgardenorcellar,toodeepfordetection:thatalreadywhathadbeendonetoherwaspunishablebydeath:andbidthemattheirperildetainher.'

Whatanoble,whatarightspirithasthischarmingcreature,incasesthatwilljustifyanexertionofspirit!--

'TheyansweredthatMr.Lovelacecouldprovehismarriage,andwouldindemnifythem.AndtheyallwouldhavevindicatedtheirbehaviouronFridaynight,andthereputationoftheirhouse.Butrefusingtohearthemonthattopic,sheflungfromthemthreatening.

'Shethenwentuphalfadozenstairsinherwaytoherownapartment:but,asifshehadbethoughtherself,downshesteptagain,andproceededtowardsthestreet-parlour;saying,asshepassedbytheinfamousDorcas,I'llmakemyselfprotectors,thoughthewindowssuffer.Butthatwench,



ofherownhead,onthelady'sgoingoutofthatparlourtoMrs.Sinclair's,hadlockedthedoor,andtakenoutthekey:sothatfindingherselfdisappointed,sheburstintotears,andwentsobbingandmenacingupstairsagain.

'Shemadenootherattempttilltheeffectualone.Yourlettersandmessages,theysuppose,comingsofastupononeanother(thoughshewouldnotansweroneofthem)gavehersomeamusement,andanassurancetothem,thatshewouldatlastforgiveyou;andthatthenallwouldendasyouwished.

'Thewomen,inpursuanceofyourorders,offerednottoobtrudethemselvesuponher;andDorcasalsokeptoutofhersightalltherestofSunday;alsoonMondayandTuesday.Butbythelady'scondescension,(eventofamiliarity)toMabell,theyimagined,thatshemustbeworkinginhermindallthattimetogetaway.Theythereforeredoubledtheircautionstothewench;whotoldthemsofaithfullyallthatpassedbetweenherladyandher,thattheyhadnodoubtofherfidelitytoherwickedtrust.

''Tisprobableshemighthavebeencontrivingsomethingallthistime;butsawnoroomforperfectinganyscheme.Thecontrivancebywhichsheeffectedherescapeseemstomenottohavebeenfallenupontilltheveryday;sinceitdependedpartlyupontheweather,asitproved.But

itisevidentshehopedsomethingfromMabell'ssimplicity,orgratitude,orcompassion,bycultivatingallthetimehercivilitytoher.

'PollywaitedonherearlyonWednesdaymorning;andmetwithabetterreceptionthanshehadreasontoexpect.Shecomplainedhowever,withwarmth,ofherconfinement.Pollysaidtherewouldbeanhappyendtoit(ifitwereaconfinement,)nextday,shepresumed.Sheabsolutelydeclaredtothecontrary,inthewayPollymeantit;andsaid,ThatMr.Lovelace,onhisreturn[whichlookedasifsheintendedtowaitforit]shouldhavereasontorepenttheordershehadgiven,astheyallshouldtheirobservanceofthem:lethimsendtwentyletters,shewouldnotanswerone,betheconsequencewhatitwould;norgivehimhopeoftheleastfavour,whileshewasinthathouse.ShehadgivenMrs.Sinclair

andthemselvesfairwarning,shesaid:noordersofanotheroughttomakethemdetainafreeperson:buthavingmadeanopenattempttogo,andbeendetainedbythem,shewasthecalmer,shetoldPolly;letthemlooktotheconsequence.

'Butyetshespokethiswithtemper;andPollygaveitasheropinion,(withapprehensionfortheirownsafety,)thathavingsogoodahandletopunishthemall,shewouldnotgoawayifshemight.Andwhat,inferredPolly,istheindemnityofamanwhohascommittedthevilestofrapesonapersonofcondition;andmusthimself,ifprosecutedforit,eitherfly,orbehanged?

'Sinclair,[soIwillstillcallher,]uponthisrepresentationofPolly,

foresaw,shesaid,theruinofherpoorhouseintheissueofthisstrangebusiness;andtheinfamousSallyandDorcasboretheirpartsintheapprehension:andthisputthemuponthinkingitadvisableforthefuture,thatthestreet-doorshouldgenerallyintheday-timebeonlyleftuponabolt-latch,astheycalledit,whichanybodymightopenontheinside;andthatthekeyshouldbekeptinthedoor;thattheirnumerouscomersandgoers,astheycalledtheirguests,shouldbeabletogiveevidence,thatshemighthavegoneoutifshewould:notforgetting,however,torenewtheirorderstoWill.toDorcas,toMabell,andtherest,toredoubletheirvigilanceonthisoccasion,topreventher



escape:noneofthemdoubting,atthesametime,thatherloveofamansoconsiderableintheireyes,andtheprospectofwhatwastohappen,asshehadreasontobelieve,onThursday,heruncle'sbirth-day,would(thoughperhapsnottillthelasthour,forherpridesake,wastheirword)engagehertochangehertemper.

'Theybelieve,thatshediscoveredthekeytobeleftinthedoor;forshewasdownmorethanoncetowalkinthelittlegarden,andseemedtocasthereyeeachtimetothestreet-door.

'Abouteightyesterdaymorning,anhourafterPollyhadlefther,shetoldMabell,shewassuresheshouldnotlivelong;andhavingagoodmanysuitsofapparel,whichafterherdeathwouldbeofnousetoanybodyshevalued,shewouldgiveherabrownlustringgown,which,withsomealterationstomakeitmoresuitabletoherdegree,wouldagreatwhileserveherforaSundaywear;forthatshe(Mabell)wastheonlypersoninthathouseofwhomshecouldthinkwithoutterrororantipathy.

'Mabellexpressinghergratitudeupontheoccasion,theladysaid,shehadnothingtoemployherselfabout,andifshecouldgetaworkwomandirectly,shewouldlookoverherthingsthen,andgiveherwhatsheintendedforher.

'Hermistress'smantua-maker,themaidreplied,livedbutalittleway

off:andshedoubtednotthatshecouldprocureher,oroneofthejourney-womentoalterthegownoutofhand.

'Iwillgiveyoualso,saidshe,aquiltedcoat,whichwillrequirebutlittlealteration,ifany;foryouaremuchaboutmystature:butthegownIwillgivedirectionsabout,becausethesleevesandtherobingsandfacingsmustbealteredforyourwear,being,Ibelieve,aboveyourstation:andtry,saidshe,ifyoucangettheworkwoman,andwe'lladviseaboutit.Ifshecannotcomenow,lethercomeintheafternoon;butIhadrathernow,becauseitwillamusemetogiveyoualift.

'Thensteppingtothewindow,itrains,saidshe,[andsoithaddoneallthemorning:]sliponthehoodandshortcloakIhaveseenyouwear,and

cometomewhenyouarereadytogoout,becauseyoushallbringmeinsomethingthatIwant.

'Mabellequippedherselfaccordingly,andreceivedhercommandstobuyhersometrifles,andthenlefther;butinherwayout,steptintothebackparlour,whereDorcaswaswithMrs.Sinclair,tellingherwhereshewasgoing,andonwhataccount,biddingDorcaslookouttillshecameback.Sofaithfulasthewenchtothetrustreposedinher,andsolittlehadthelady'sgenerositywroughtuponher.

'Mrs.Sinclaircommendedher;Dorcasenviedher,andtookhercue:andMabellsoonreturnedwiththemantua-maker'sjourney-woman;(sheresolved,shesaid,butshewouldnotcomewithouther);andthenDorcas

wentoffguard.

'Theladylookedoutthegownandpetticoat,andbeforetheworkwomancausedMabelltotryiton;and,thatitmightfitthebetter,madethewillingwenchpulloffherupper-petticoat,andputonthatshegaveher.ThenshebidthemgointoMr.Lovelace'sapartment,andcontriveaboutitbeforethepier-glassthere,andstaytillshecametothem,togivethemheropinion.

'Mabellwouldhavetakenherownclothes,andhood,andshortcloakwith



her:butherladysaid,Nomatter;youmayputthemonagainhere,whenwehaveconsideredaboutthealterations:there'snooccasiontolittertheotherroom.

'Theywent;andinstantly,asitissupposed,shesliptonMabell'sgownandpetticoatoverherown,whichwaswhitedamask,andputonthewench'shood,shortcloak,andordinaryapron,anddownshewent.

'Hearingsomebodytrippingalongthepassage,bothWill.andDorcaswhipttotheinner-halldoor,andsawher;but,takingherforMabell,Areyougoingfar,Mabell?criedWill.

'Withoutturningherface,oranswering,sheheldoutherhand,pointingtothestairs;whichtheyconstruedasacautionforthemtolookoutinherabsence;andsupposingshewouldnotbelonggone,asshehadnotinform,repeatedhercautiontothem,upwentWill,tarryingatthestairs-headinexpectationofthesupposedMabell'sreturn.

'Mabellandtheworkwomanwaitedagoodwhile,amusingthemselvesnotdisagreeably,theonewithcontrivinginthewayofherbusiness,theotherdelightingherselfwithherfinegownandcoat.Butatlast,wonderingtheladydidnotcomeintothem,Mabelltiptoedittoherdoor,andtapping,andnotbeinganswered,steptintothechamber.

'Will.atthatinstant,fromhisstationatthestairs-head,seeingMabellinherlady'sclothes;forhehadbeentoldofthepresent,[giftstoservantsflyfromservanttoservantinaminute,]wasverymuchsurprised,having,ashethought,justseenhergooutinherown;andsteppingup,metheratthedoor.Howthedevilcanthisbe?saidhe:justnowyouwentoutinyourowndress!Howcameyouhereinthis?andhowcouldyoupassmeunseen?butnevertheless,kissingher,said,hewouldnowbraghehadkissedhislady,oroneinherclothes.

'Iamglad,Mr.William,criedMabell,toseeyouheresodiligently.Butknowyouwheremyladyis?

'Inmymaster'sapartment,answeredWill.Isshenot?Wasshenot

talkingwithyouthismoment?

'No,that'sMrs.Dolins'sjourney-woman.

'Theybothstoodaghast,astheysaid;Will,againrecollectinghehadseenMabell,ashethought,gooutinherownclothes.Andwhiletheyweredebatingandwondering,upcomesDorcaswithyourfourthletter,justthenbroughtforthelady,andseeingMabelldressedout,(whomshehadlikewisebeheldalittlebefore),asshesupposed,inhercommonclothes;shejoinedinthewonder;tillMabell,re-enteringthelady'sapartment,missedherownclothes;andthensuspectingwhathadhappened,andlettingtheothersintothegroundofthesuspicion,theyallagreedthatshehadcertainlyescaped.Andthenfollowedsuchanuproarof

mutualaccusation,andyoushouldhavedonethis,andyouhavedonethat,asalarmedthewholehouse;everyapartmentinbothhousesgivingupitsdevil,tothenumberoffourteenorfifteen,includingthemotherandherpartners.

'Will.toldthemhisstory;andthenranout,asonthelikeoccasionformerly,tomakeinquirywhethertheladywasseenbyanyofthecoachmen,chairmen,orporters,plyinginthatneighbourhood:whileDorcasclearedherselfimmediately,andthatatthepoorMabell'sexpense,whomadeafigureasguiltyasawkward,havingonthesuspected



priceofhertreachery;whichDorcas,outofenvy,wasreadytotearfromherback.

'Hereuponallthepackopenedatthepoorwench,whilethemotherfoamedatthemouth,bellowedoutherordersforseizingthesuspectedoffender;whocouldneitherbeheardinherowndefence,norhadshebeenheard,wouldhavebeenbelieved.

'Thatsuchaperfidiouswretchshouldeverdisgraceherhouse,wasthemother'scry;goodpeoplemightbecorrupted;butitwasafinethingifsuchahouseasher'scouldnotbefaithfullyservedbycursedcreatureswhowerehiredknowingthebusinesstheyweretobeemployedin,andwhohadnopretencetoprinciple!--D--nher,thewretchproceeded!--Shehadnopatiencewithher!callthecook,andcallthescullion!

'Theywereathand.

'See,thatguiltypyeballdevil,washerword--(herlady'sgownuponherback)--butI'llpunishherforawarningtoallbetrayersoftheirtrust.Putonthegreatgridironthismoment,[anoathoracurseateveryword:]makeuparoaringfire--thecleaverbringmethisinstant--I'llcutherintoquarterswithmyownhands;andcarbonadeandbroilthetraitressforafeasttoallthedogsandcatsintheneighbourhood,andeatthefirstsliceofthetoadmyself,withoutsaltorpepper.

'ThepoorMabell,frightedoutofherwits,expectedeverymomenttobetorninpieces,havinghalfascoreopen-clawedpawsuponherallatonce.Shepromisedtoconfessall.Butthatall,whenshehadobtainedahearing,wasnothing:fornothinghadshetoconfess.

'Sally,hereuponwithacurseofmercy,orderedhertoretire;undertakingthatsheandPollywouldexamineherthemselves,thattheymightbeabletowriteallparticularstohishonour;andthen,ifshecouldnotclearherself,or,ifguilty,givesomeaccountofthelady,(whohadbeensowickedastogivethemallthistrouble,)soastheymightgetheragain,thenthecleaverandgridironmightgotoworkwithalltheirheart.

'Thewench,gladofthisreprieve,wentupstairs;andwhileSallywaslayingoutthelaw,andpratingawayinherusualdictorialmanner,whiptonanothergown,andslidingdownthestairs,escapedtoherrelations.Andthisflight,whichwascertainlymoreowingtoterrorthanguilt,was,inthetrueOldBaileyconstruction,madeaconfirmationofthelatter.'

***

ThesearetheparticularsofMissHarlowe'sflight.Thou'lthardlythink

metoominute.--HowIlongtotriumphoverthyimpatienceandfuryontheoccasion!

Letmebeseechthee,mydearLovelace,inthynextletter,toravemostgloriously!--Ishallbegrievouslydisappointedifthoudostnot.

***



Where,Lovelace,canthepoorladybegone?Andwhocandescribethedistressshemustbein?

Bythyformerletters,itmaybesupposed,thatshecanhaveverylittlemoney:nor,bythesuddennessofherflight,moreclothesthanthoseshehason.Andthouknowestwhooncesaid,*'Herparentswillnotreceiveher.Heruncleswillnotentertainher.HerNortonisintheirdirection,andcannot.MissHowedarenot.Shehasnotonefriendorintimateintown--entirelyastrangertoit.'And,letmeadd,hasbeendespoiledofherhonourbythemanforwhomshehadmadeallthesesacrifices;andwhostoodboundtoherbyathousandoathsandvows,tobeherhusband,herprotector,andfriend!

*SeeVol.IV.LetterXXI.

Howstrongmustbeherresentmentofthebarbaroustreatmentshehasreceived!howworthyofherself,thatithasmadeherhatethemansheonceloved!and,ratherthanmarryhim,choosetoexposeherdisgracetothewholeworld:toforegothereconciliationwithherfriendswhichherheartwassosetupon:andtohazardathousandevilstowhichheryouthandhersexmaytooprobablyexposeanindigentandfriendlybeauty!

Rememberestthounotthathomepushuponthee,inoneofthepaperswritteninherdelirium;ofwhich,howeveritsavoursnot?----

Iwillassurethee,thatIhaveveryoftensincemostseriouslyreflecteduponit:andasthyintendedsecondoutrageconvincesmethatitmadenoimpressionupontheethen,andperhapsthouhastneverthoughtofitsince,Iwilltranscribethesentence.

'If,asreligionteachesus,Godwilljudgeus,inagreatmeasure!byourbenevolentorevilactionstooneanother--Owretch!bethinkthee,intimebethinkthee,howgreatmustbethycondemnation.'*

*SeeVol.VI.LetterXVI.

Andisthisamiabledoctrinethesumofreligion?Uponmyfaith,believeitis.For,toindulgeaseriousthought,sincewearenotatheists,exceptinpractice,doesGod,theBEINGofBeings,wantanythingofusforHIMSELF!Anddoeshenotenjoinusworksofmercytooneanother,asthemeanstoobtainhismercy?Asublimeprinciple,andworthyoftheSUPREMESUPERINTENDENTandFATHERofallthings!--Butifwearetobejudgedbythisnobleprinciple,what,indeed,mustbethycondemnationonthescoreofthisladyonly?andwhatmine,andwhatallourconfraternity's,onthescoreofotherwomen:thoughwearenoneofushalfsobadasthouart,aswellforwantofinclination,Ihope,as

ofopportunity!

Imustadd,that,aswellforthyownsake,asforthelady's,Iwishyewereyettobemarriedtoeachother.Itistheonlymediumthatcanbehitupontosalvethehonourofboth.Allthat'spastmayyetbeconcealedfromtheworld,andfromallhersufferings,ifthouresolvesttobeatenderandkindhusbandtoher.

Andifthisreallybethyintention,Iwillacceptwithpleasureofacommissionfromtheethatshalltendtopromotesogoodanend,whenever



shecanbefound;thatistosay,ifshewilladmittoherpresenceamanwhoprofessesfriendshiptothee.NorcanIgiveagreaterdemonstration,thatIam

Thysincerefriend,J.BELFORD.

P.S.Mabell'sclotheswerethrownintothepassagethismorning:nobodyknowsbywhom.

LETTERXLIX

MR.LOVELACE,TOJOHNBELFORD,ESQ.FRIDAY,JUNE30.

Iamruined,undone,blownup,destroyed,andworsethanannihilated,that'scertain!--Butwasnotthenewsshockingenough,dostthouthink,withoutthythrowingintothetoo-weightyscalereproaches,whichthoucouldsthavehadnoopportunitytomakebutformyownvoluntarycommunications?atatimetoo,when,asitfallsout,Ihaveanotherverysensibledisappointmenttostrugglewith?

Iimagine,iftherebesuchathingasfuturepunishment,itmustbenoneofthesmallestmortifications,thatanewdevilshallbepunishedbyaworseoldone.And,takethat!And,takethat!tohavetheoldsatyrcrytothescreamingsufferer,layingonwithacat-o'-nine-tails,withastarofburningbrassattheendofeach:and,forwhat!forwhat!---Why,ifthetruthmaybefairlytold,fornotbeingsobadadevilasmyself.

Thouart,surely,casuistgoodenoughtoknow,(whatIhaveinsistedupon*heretofore,)thatthesinofseducingacredulousandeasygirl,isasgreatasthatofbringingtoyourlureanincredulousandwatchfulone.

*SeeVol.IV.LetterXVII.

HoweverungenerousanappearancewhatIamgoingtosaymayhavefrommypen,letmetellthee,thatifsuchawomanasMissHarlowechosetoenterintothematrimonialstate,[Iamresolvedtodisappointtheeinthymeditatedtriumphovermyrageanddespair!]and,accordingtotheoldpatriarchalsystem,togooncontributingtogetsonsanddaughters,withnootherviewthantobringthemuppiously,andtobegoodandusefulmembersofthecommonwealth,whatadevilhadshetodo,toletherfancyrunagaddingafterarake?onewhomsheknewtobearake?

Oh!buttrulyshehopedtohavethemeritofreclaiminghim.Shehadformedprettynotionshowcharmingitwouldlooktohaveapenitentofherownmakingdanglingathersideatchurch,throughanapplaudingneighbourhood:and,astheirfamilyincreased,marchingwithherthither,attheheadoftheirboysandgirls,processionally,asitwere,boastingofthefruitsoftheirhonestdesires,asmygoodlordbishophasitinhislicense.Andthen,whatacomelysight,allkneelingdowntogetherinonepew,accordingtoeldershipaswehaveseenineffigy,awholefamilyuponsomeoldmonument,wherethehonestchevalierinarmourispresentedkneeling,withup-liftedhands,andhalfadozenjolter-headed



crop-earedboysbehindhim,rangedgradatim,orstep-fashionaccordingtoageandsize,allinthesameposture--facinghispiousdame,witharuffaboutherneck,andasmanywhey-facedgirlsallkneelingbehindher:analtarbetweenthem,andanopenbookuponit:overtheirheadssemiluminaryraysdartingfromgildedclouds,surroundinganachievement-motto,INCOELOSALUS--orQUIES--perhaps,iftheyhavehappenedtolivetheusualmarriedlifeofbrawlandcontradiction.

ItiscertainlyasmuchmymisfortunetohavefalleninwithMissClarissaHarlowe,wereItohavevaluedmyreputationorease,asitisthatofMissHarlowetohavebeenacquaintedwithme.And,afterall,whathaveIdonemorethanprosecutethemaxim,bywhichthouandIandeveryrakearegoverned,andwhich,beforeIknewthislady,wehavepursuedfromprettygirltoprettygirl,asfastaswehavesetonedown,takinganotherup;--justasthefellowsdowiththeirflyingcoachesandflyinghorsesatacountryfair----withaWhoridesnext!Whoridesnext!

Buthereinthepresentcase,tocarryonthevolantmetaphor,(forImusteitherbemerry,ormad,)isaprettylittlemissjustcomeoutofherhanging-sleeve-coat,broughttobuyaprettylittlefairing;fortheworld,Jack,isbutagreatfair,thouknowest;and,togivetheeseriousreflectionforserious,allitsjoysbuttinselledhobby-horses,giltgingerbread,squeakingtrumpets,painteddrums,andsoforth.

Nowbeholdthisprettylittlemissskimmingfromboothtobooth,inaveryprettymanner.OneprettylittlefellowcalledWyerley,perhaps;anotherjiggetingrascalcalledBiron,athirdsimperingvarletofthenameofSymmes,andamorehideousvillainthananyofthereset,withalongbagunderhisarm,andparchmentsettlementstaggedtohisheels,yelpedSolmes:pursueherfromraree-showtoraree-show,shoulderingupononeanotherateveryturn,stoppingwhenshestops,andsetaspinningagainwhenshemoves.Andthusdangledafter,butstillintheeyeofherwatchfulguardians,traversestheprettylittlemissthroughthewholefair,equallydelightedanddelighting:tillatlast,takenwiththeinvitationofthelaced-hatorator,andseeingseveralprettylittlebib-wearersstucktogetherintheflying-coaches,cuttingsafelythe

yieldingair,intheone-go-uptheothergo-downpicture-of-the-worldvehicle,andallwithaslittlefearaswit,istemptedtoridenext.

Inthensupposesheslilypops,whennoneofherfriendsarenearher:Andif,aftertwoorthreeupsanddowns,herprettyheadturnsgiddy,andshethrowsherselfoutofthecoachwhenatitselevation,andsodashesoutherprettylittlebrains,whocanhelpit?--Andwouldyouhangthepoorfellow,whoseprofessedtradeitwastosettheprettylittlecreatureaflying?

'Tistrue,thisprettylittlemiss,beingaveryprettylittlemiss,beingaverymuch-admiredlittlemiss,beingaverygoodlittlemiss,whoalwaysmindedherbook,andhadpassedthroughhersampler-doctrinewith

highapplause;hadevenstitchedout,ingaudyproprietyofcolors,anAbrahamofferingupIsaac,aSampsonandthePhilistines;andflowers,andknots,andtrees,andthesunandthemoon,andthesevenstars,allhungupinframeswithglassesbeforethem,fortheadmirationofherfuturegrandchildren:wholikewisewasentitledtoaveryprettylittleestate:whowasdescendedfromaprettylittlefamilyupwardsofonehundredyearsgentility;whichlivedinaveryprettylittlemanner,respectedaverylittleontheirownaccounts,agreatdealonher's:----

Forsuchaprettylittlemissasthistocometosogreatamisfortune,



mustbeaverysadthing:But,tellme,wouldnotthelosingofanyordinarychild,ofanyotherlessconsiderablefamily,orlessshiningoramiablequalities,havebeenasgreatandheavyalosstothatfamily,asthelosingthisprettylittlemisscouldbetoher's?

Todescendtoaverylowinstance,andthatonlyastopersonality;hastthouanydoubt,thatthystrong-muscledbony-facedwasasmuchadmiredbythymother,asifithadbeenthefaceofaLovelace,oranyotherhandsomefellow?Andhadthypicturebeendrawn,wouldshehaveforgiventhepainter,hadhenotexpressedsoexactlythylineaments,asthateveryoneshouldhavediscernedthelikeness?Thehandsomelikenessisallthatiswishedfor.Uglinessmadefamiliartous,withthepartialitynaturaltofondparents,willbebeautyalltheworldover.--Dothouapply.

But,alas!Jack,allthisisbutacopyofmycountenance,drawntoevadethymalice!--Thoughitanswerthyunfriendlypurposetoownit,Icannotforbeartoownit,thatIamstungtotheverysoulwiththisunhappy--accident,mustIcallit!--HaveInobody,whosethroat,eitherforcarelessnessortreachery,Ioughttocut,inordertopacifymyvengeance?

WhenIreflectuponmylastiniquitousintention,thefirstoutragesonoblyresented,aswellas,sofarasshewasable,sonoblyresisted,I

cannotbutconclude,thatIwasunderthepoweroffascinationfromtheseaccursedCirces;who,pretendingtoknowtheirownsex,wouldhaveit,thatthereisineverywomanayielding,oraweak-resistingmomenttobemetwith:andthatyet,andyet,andyet,Ihadnottriedenough;butthat,ifneitherlovenorterrorshouldenablemetohitthatluckymoment,when,byhelpoftheircursedarts,shewasonceovercome,shewouldbeforeverovercome:--appealingtoallmyexperience,toallmyknowledgeofthesex,forjustificationoftheirassertion.

Myappealtoexperience,Iown,wasbuttoofavourabletotheirargument:FordostthouthinkIcouldhaveheldmypurposeagainstsuchanangelasthis,hadIeverbeforemetwithawomansomuchinearnesttodefendherhonouragainsttheunweariedartificesandperseveranceofthemanshe

loved?Whythenweretherenotmoreexamplesofavirtuesoimmovable?Or,whywasthissingularonetofalltomylot?exceptindeedtodoublemyguilt;andatthesametimetoconvinceallthatshouldhearherstory,thatthereareangelsaswellasdevilsintheflesh?

Somuchforconfession;andforthesakeofhumouringmyconscience;withaviewlikewisetodisarmthymalicebyacknowledgement:sincenooneshallsayworseofme,thanIwillofmyselfonthisoccasion.

OnethingIwillneverthelessadd,toshowthesincerityofmycontrition--'Tisthis,thatifthoucanstbyanymeansfindheroutwithinthesethreedays,oranytimebeforeshehasdiscoveredthestoriesrelatingtoCaptainTomlinsonandheruncletobewhattheyare;andifthoucanst

prevailuponhertoconsent,Iwillactually,inthypresenceandhis,(hetorepresentheruncle,)marryher.

Iamstillinhopesitmaybeso--shecannotbelongconcealed--Ihavealreadysetallenginesatworktofindherout!andifIdo,whatindifferentpersons,[andnooneofherfriends,asthouobservest,willlookuponher,]willcaretoembroilthemselveswithamanofmyfigure,fortune,andresolution?Showherthispart,then,oranyotherpartofthisletter,asthyowndiscretion,ifthoucanstfindher:for,afterall,methinks,Iwouldbegladthatthisaffair,whichisbadenoughin



itself,shouldgooffwithoutworsepersonalconsequencestoanybodyelse:andyetitrunsinmymind,Iknownotwhy,that,soonerorlateritwilldrawafewdropsofbloodafterit;exceptsheandIcanmakeitupbetweenourselves.Andthismaybeanotherreasonwhysheshouldnotcarryherresentmenttoofar--notthatsuchanaffairwouldgivememuchconcernneither,wereItochooseanymanofmen,forIheartilyhateallherfamily,butherself;andevershall.

***

Letmeadd,thatthelady'splottoescapeappearstomenoextraordinaryone.Therewasmuchmoreluckthanprobabilitythatitshoulddo:since,tomakeitsucceed,itwasnecessarythatDorcasandWill.,andSinclairandhernymphs,shouldbealldeceived,orofftheirguard.Itbelongstome,whenIseethem,togivethemmyheartythanksthattheywere;andthattheirselfishcaretoprovidefortheirownfuturesecurity,shouldinducethemtoleavetheiroutwarddoorupontheirbolt-latch,andbecurs'dtothem.

Mabelldeservesapitchsuitandabonfire,ratherthanthelustring;andasherclothesarereturned,lethelady'sbeputtoherothers,tobesenttoherwhenitcanbetoldwhither--butnottillIgivetheword

neither;forwemustgetthedearfugitivebackagainifpossible.Isupposethatmystupidvillain,whoknewnotsuchagoddess-shapedladywithamiensonoble,fromtheawkwardandbent-shoulderedMabell,hasbeenatHampsteadtoseeafterher.AndyetIhardlythinkshewouldgothither.Heoughttogothrougheverystreetwherebillsforlodgingsareup,toinquireafteranew-comer.Thehousesofsuchasdealinwomen'smatters,andtea,coffee,andsuch-like,arethosetobeinquiredatforher.Ifsometidingsbenotquicklyheardofher,IwouldnothaveeitherDorcas,Will.,orMabell,appearinmysight,whatevertheirsuperiorsthinkfittodo.

This,thoughwrittenincharacter,isaverylongletter,consideringit

isnotanarrativeone,orajournalofproceedings,likemostofmyformer;forsuchwillunavoidablyandnaturally,asImaysay,runintolength.ButIhavesousedmyselftowriteagreatdealoflate,thatIknownothowtohelpit.YetImustaddtoitslength,inordertoexplainmyselfonahintIgaveatthebeginningofit;whichwas,thatIhaveanotherdisappointment,besidesthisofMissHarlowe'sescape,tobemoan.

Andwhatdostthouthinkitis?Why,theoldPeer,poxofhistoughconstitution,(forthatmaladywouldhavehelpedhimon,)hasmadeshiftbyfireandbrimstone,andthedevilknowswhat,toforcethegouttoquitthecounterscarpofhisstomach,justasithadcollectedallitsstrength,inordertostormthecitadelofhisheart.Inshort,they

have,bythemereforceofstink-pots,hand-granades,andpop-guns,driventheslow-workingpioneerquiteoutofthetrunkintotheextremities;andthereitliesnibblingandgnawinguponhisgreattoe;whenIhadafairendofthedistemperandthedistempered.

ButI,whocouldwritetotheeoflaudanum,andthewetcloth,formerly,yetlet8000Â£.ayearslipthroughmyfingers,whenIhadentereduponitmorethaninimagination,[forIhadbeguntoaskthestewardsquestions,andtohearthemtalkoffinesandrenewals,andsuchsortofstuff,]deservetobemortified.



Thoucanstnotimaginehowdifferentlytheservants,andevenmycousins,lookuponme,sinceyesterday,towhattheydidbefore.Neithertheonenortheotherboworcourtesyhalfsolow--noramIaquartersooftenhishonourandyourhonour,asIwaswithinthesefewhours,withtheformer:andastothelatter--itiscousinBobbyagain,withtheusualfamiliarity,insteadofSir,andSir,andIfyouplease,Mr.Lovelace.Andnowtheyhavetheinsolencetocongratulatemeontherecoveryofthebestofuncles;whileIamforcedtoseemasmuchdelightedasthey,when,woulditdomegood,Icouldsitdownandcrymyeyesout.

Ihadbespokemymourninginimagination,aftertheexampleofacertainforeignminister,who,beforethedeath,orevenlastillnessofCharlesII.,ashonestWhiteKennettellsus,hadhalfexhaustedBlackwell-hallofitssables--anindication,asthehistorianwouldinsinuate,thatthemonarchwastobepoisoned,andtheambassadorinthesecret.--Andyet,foolthatIwas,Icouldnottakethehint--Whatthedevildoesamanreadhistoryfor,ifhecannotprofitbytheexampleshefindinit?

Butthus,Jack,isanobservationoftheoldPeer'sverified,thatonemisfortuneseldomcomesalone:andsoconcludes

ThydoublymortifiedLOVELACE.

LETTERL

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMISSHOWEWEDNESDAYNIGHT,JUNE28.

OMYDEARESTMISSHOWE!

OncemorehaveIescaped--But,alas!I,mybestself,havenotescaped!--Oh!yourpoorClarissaHarlowe!youalsowillhateme,Ifear!----

Yetyouwon't,whenyouknowall!

Butnomoreofmyself!mylostself.Youthatcanriseinamorningtobeblest,andtobless;andgotorestdelightedwithyourownreflections,andinyourunbroken,unstartingslumbers,conversingwithsaintsandangels,theformeronlymorepurethanyourself,astheyhaveshakenofftheincumbranceofbody;youshallbemysubject,asyouhavelong,long,beenmyonlypleasure.Andletme,atawfuldistance,reveremybelovedAnnaHowe,andinherreflectuponwhatherClarissaHarloweoncewas!

***

Forgive,Oforgivemyrambling.Mypeaceisdestroyed.Myintellectsaretouched.Andwhatflightynonsensemustyouread,ifyounowwillvouchsafetocorrespondwithme,asformerly!

Omybest,mydearest,myonlyfriend!whatatalehaveItounfold!--Butstilluponself,thisvile,thishatedself!--Iwillshakeitoff,ifpossible;andwhyshouldInot,sinceIthink,exceptonewretch,Ihate



nothingsomuch?Self,then,bebanishedfromselfonemoment(forIdoubtitwillbefornolonger)toinquireafteradearerobject,mybelovedAnnaHowe!--whosemind,allrobedinspotlesswhite,charmsandirradiates--ButwhatwouldIsay?----

***

Andhow,mydearestfriend,afterthisrhapsody,whichonre-perusal,Iwouldnotletgo,buttoshowyouwhatadistractedminddictatestomytremblingpen!Howdoyou?Youhavebeenveryill,itseems.Thatyouarerecovered,mydear,letmehear.Thatyourmotheriswell,prayletmehear,andhearquickly.Thiscomfortsurelyisowingtome;foriflifeisnoworsethanchequer-work,Imustnowhavealittlewhitetocome,havingseennothingbutblack,allunchequereddismalblack,foragreat,greatwhile.

***

Andwhatisallthiswildincoherencefor?Itisonlytobegtoknowhowyouhavebeen,andhowyoudonow,byalinedirectedforMrs.Rachel

Clark,atMr.Smith's,aglove-shop,inKing-street,Covent-garden;which(althoughmyabodeissecrettoeverybodyelse)willreachthehandsof--yourunhappy--butthat'snotenough----

YourmiserableCLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLI

MRS.HOWE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[SUPERSCRIBEDASDIRECTEDINTHEPRECEDING.]

FRIDAY,JUNE30.

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,

Youwillwondertoreceivealetterfromme.Iamsorryforthegreatdistressyouseemtobein.Suchahopefulyoungladyasyouwere!Butseewhatcomesofdisobediencetoparents!

Formypart;althoughIpityyou,yetImuchmorepityyourpoorfatherandmother.Sucheducationastheygaveyou!suchimprovementasyoumade!andsuchdelightastheytookinyou!--Andallcometothis!--

Butpray,Miss,don'tmakemyNancyguiltofyourfault;whichisthatofdisobedience.Ihavechargedheroverandovernottocorrespondwithonewhohadmadesuchagiddystep.Itisnottoherreputation,Iamsure.YouknowthatIsochargedher;yetyougooncorrespondingtogether,tomyverygreatvexation;forshehasbeenveryperverseuponitmorethanonce.Evilcommunication,Miss--youknowtherest.

Here,peoplecannotbeunhappybythemselves,buttheymustinvoketheirfriendsandacquaintancewhosediscretionhaskeptthemclearoftheirerrors,intonearasmuchunhappinessasiftheyhadrunintothelike



oftheirownheads!Thusmypoordaughterisalwaysintearsandgrief.Andshehaspostponedherownfelicity,truly,becauseyouareunhappy.

Ifpeople,whoseektheirownruin,couldbetheonlysufferersbytheirheadstrongdoings,itweresomething:But,OMiss,Miss!whathaveyoutoanswerfor,whohavemadeasmanygrievedheartsashaveknownyou!Thewholesexisindeedwoundedbyyou:For,whobutMissClarissaHarlowewasproposedbyeveryfatherandmotherforapatternfortheirdaughters?

Iwritealongletter,whereIproposedtosaybutafewwords;andthosetoforbidyourwritingtomyNancy:andthisaswellbecauseofthefalsestepyouhavemade,asbecauseitwillgrieveherpoorheart,anddoyounogood.Ifyouloveher,therefore,writenottoher.Yoursadlettercameintomyhands,Nancybeingabroad:andIshallnotshowither:fortherewouldbenocomfortforher,ifshesawit,norforme,whosedelightsheis--asyouoncewastoyourparents.--

Butyouseemtobesensibleenoughofyourerrorsnow.--Soareallgiddygirls,whenitistoolate:andwhatacrest-fallenfigurethendotheconsequencesoftheirself-willedobstinacyandheadstrongnesscompelthemtomake!

Imaysaytoomuch:onlyasIthinkitpropertobearthattestimony

againstyourrashnesswhichitbehoveseverycarefulparenttobear:andnonemorethan

Yourcompassionating,well-wishingANNABELLAHOWE.

Isendthisbyaspecialmessenger,whohasbusinessonlysofarasBarnet,becauseyoushallhavenoneedtowriteagain;knowinghowyoulovewriting:andknowing,likewise,thatmisfortunemakespeopleplaintive.

LETTERLII

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMRS.HOWE.SATURDAY,JULY1.

Permitme,Madam,totroubleyouwithafewlines,wereitonlytothankyouforyourreproofs;whichhaveneverthelessdrawnfreshstreamsofbloodfromableedingheart.

Mystoryisadismalstory.Ithascircumstancesinitthatwouldengagepity,andpossiblyajudgmentnotaltogetherunfavourable,werethosecircumstancesknown.Butitismybusiness,andshallbeallmy

business,torepentofmyfailings,andnotendeavourtoextenuatethem.

NorwillIseektodistressyourworthymind.IfIcannotsufferalone,IwillmakeasfewpartiesasIcaninmysufferings.And,indeed,ItookupmypenwiththisresolutionwhenIwrotetheletterwhichhasfallenintoyourhands.Itwasonlytoknow,andthatforaveryparticularreason,aswellasforaffectionunbounded,ifmydearMissHowe,fromwhomIhadnotheardofalongtime,wereill;asIhadbeentoldshewas;andifso,howshenowdoes.Butmyinjuriesbeingrecent,andmydistresseshavingbeenexceedinggreat,selfwouldcrowdintomy



letter.Whendistressed,thehumanmindisapttoturnitselftoeveryone,inwhomitimaginedorwishedaninterest,forpityandconsolation.--Or,toexpressmyselfbetter,andmoreconcisely,inyourownwords,misfortunemakespeopleplaintive:Andtowhom,ifnottoafriend,cantheafflictedcomplain?

MissHowebeingabroadwhenmylettercame,Iflattermyselfthatsheisrecovered.Butitwouldbesomesatisfactiontometobeinformedifshehasbeenill.Anotherlinefromyourhandwouldbetoogreatafavour:butifyouwillbepleasedtodirectanyservanttoansweryes,orno,tothatquestion,Iwillnotbefarthertroublesome.

Nevertheless,Imustdeclare,thatmyMissHowe'sfriendshipwasallthecomfortIhad,orexpectedtohaveinthisworld;andalinefromherwouldhavebeenacordialtomyfaintingheart.Judgethen,dearestMadam,howreluctantlyImustobeyyourprohibition--butyetIwillendeavourtoobeyit;althoughIshouldhavehoped,aswellfromthetenorofallthathaspassedbetweenMissHoweandme,asfromherestablishedvirtue,thatshecouldnotbetaintedbyevilcommunication,hadoneortwolettersbeenpermitted.This,however,Iasknotfor,sinceIthinkIhavenothingtodobuttobegofGod(who,Ihope,hasnotyetwithdrawnhisgracefromme,althoughhehaspleadedtoletloosehisjusticeuponmyfaults)togivemeatrulybrokenspirit,ifitbenotalreadybrokenenough,andthentotaketohismercy

TheunhappyCLARISSAHARLOWE.

Twofavours,goodMadam,Ihavetobegofyou.--Thefirst,--thatyouwillnotletanyofmyrelationsknowthatyouhaveheardfromme.Theother,--thatnolivingcreaturebeapprizedwhereIamtobeheardof,ordirectedto.ThisisapointthatconcernsmemorethanIcanexpress.--Inshort,mypreservationfromfurtherevilsmaydependuponit.

LETTERLIII

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOHANNAHBURTONTHURSDAY,JUNE29.

MYGOODHANNAH,

Strangethingshavehappenedtome,sinceyouweredismissedmyservice(sosorelyagainstmywill)andyourpertfellowservantsetoverme.Butthatmustallbeforgottennow--

Howdoyou,myHannah?Areyourecoveredofyourillness?Ifyouare,

doyouchoosetocomeandbewithme?Orcanyouconveniently?

Iamaveryunhappycreature,and,beingamongallstrangers,shouldbeverygladtohaveyouwithme,ofwhosefidelityandloveIhavehadsomanyacceptableinstances.

Livingordying,Iwillendeavourtomakeitworthyourwhile,myHannah.

Ifyouarerecovered,asIhope,andifyouhaveagoodplace,itmaybetheywouldbearwithyourabsence,andsuffersomebodyinyourroomfora



monthorso:and,bythattime,Ihopetobeprovidedfor,andyoumaythenreturntoyourplace.

Don'tletanyofmyfriendsknowofthismydesire:whetheryoucancomeornot.

IamatMr.Smith's,ahosier'sandgloveshop,inKing-street,Covent-garden.

YoumustdirecttomebythenameofRachelClark.

Do,mygoodHannah,comeifyoucantoyourpooryoungmistress,whoalwaysvaluedyou,andalwayswillwhetheryoucomeornot.

IsendthistoyourmotheratSt.Alban's,notknowingwheretodirecttoyou.Returnmealine,thatImayknowwhattodependupon:andIshallseeyouhavenotforgottentheprettyhandyouweretaught,inhappydays,by

Yourtruefriend,CLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLIVHANNAHBURTON[INANSWER.]MONDAY,JULY3.

HONOREDMADDAM,

Ihavenotforgottowrite,andneverwillforgetanythingyou,mydearyounglady,wassogoodastolarnme.Iamverysorrowfulforyourmisfortens,mydearestyounglady;sosorrowfull,Idonotknowwhattodo.GladdathartewouldIbetobeabletocometoyou.ButindeedI

havenotbeenabletostiroutofmyromehereatmymother'seversinceIwasforsedtoleavemyplasewitharoomatise,whichhasmademequiteandclenehelpless.Iwillprayforyounightandday,mydearest,mykindest,mygoodestyounglady,whohavebeensobadlyused;andIamverysorryIcannotcometodoyouloveandsarvice;whichwilleverbeintheharteofmeetodo,ifitwasinmypower:whoam

Yourmostdutifulservanttocommand,HANNAHBURTON.

LETTERLV

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMRS.JUDITHNORTONTHURSDAY,JUNE29.

MYDEARMRS.NORTON,

Iaddressmyselftoyou,afteraverylongsilence,(which,however,wasnotowingeithertowantofloveorduty,)principallytodesireyoutosatisfymeintwoorthreepoints,whichitbehovesmetoknow.



Myfather,andallthefamily,Iaminformed,aretobeatmyuncleHarlowe'sthisday,asusual.Prayacquaintme,iftheyhavebeenthere?Andiftheywerecheerfulontheanniversaryoccasion?Andalso,ifyouhaveheardofanyjourney,orintendedjourney,ofmybrother,incompanywithCaptainSingletonandMr.Solmes?

Strangethingshavehappenedtome,mydear,worthyandmaternalfriend--verystrangethings!--Mr.Lovelacehasprovedaverybarbarousandungratefulmantome.But,Godbepraised,Ihaveescapedfromhim.Beingamongabsolutestrangers(thoughIthinkworthyfolks)IhavewrittentoHannahBurtontocomeandbewithme.Ifthegoodcreaturefallinyourway,prayencouragehertocometome.Ialwaysintendedtohaveher,sheknows:buthopedtobeinhappiercircumstances.

Saynothingtoanyofmyfriendsthatyouhaveheardfromme.

Pray,doyouthinkmyfatherwouldbeprevailedupon,ifIweretosupplicatehimbyletter,totakeofftheheavycursehelaiduponmeatmygoingfromHarlowe-place?Icanexpectnootherfavourfromhim.Butthatbeingliterallyfulfilledastomyprospectsinthislife,Ihopeitwillbethoughttohaveoperatedfarenough;andmyheartissoweak!--itisveryweak!--Butformyfather'sownsake--whatshouldIsay!--IndeedIhardlyknowhowIoughttoexpressmyselfonthissadsubject!--butit

willgiveeasetomymindtobereleasedfromit.IamafraidmyPoor,asIusedtocallthegoodcreaturestowhosenecessitiesIwaswonttoadministerbyyourfaithfulhands,havemissedmeoflate.Butnow,alas!Iampoormyself.Itisnottheleastaggravationofmyfault,norofmyregrets,thatwithsuchinclinationsasGodhasgivenme,IhaveputitourofmypowertodothegoodIoncepleasedmyselftothinkIwasborntodo.Itisasadthing,mydearestMrs.Nortin,torenderuselesstoourselvesandtheworld,byourownrashness,thetalentswhichProvidencehasintrustedtous,fortheserviceofboth.

Butthesereflectionsarenowtoolate;andperhapsIoughttohavekept

themtomyself.Letme,however,hopethatyoulovemestill.Prayletmehopethatyoudo.Andthen,notwithstandingmymisfortunes,whichhavemademeseemungratefultothekindandtrulymaternalpainsyouhavetakenwithmefrommycradle,Ishallhavethehappinesstothinkthatthereisoneworthyperson,whohatesnot

TheunfortunateCLARISSAHARLOWE.

Prayremembermetomyfoster-brother.Ihopehecontinuesdutifulandgoodtoyou.BepleasedtodirectforRachelClark,atMr.Smith's,inKing-street,Covent-garden.Butkeepthedirectionanabsolutesecret.

LETTERLVI

MRS.NORTON[INANSWER.]SATURDAY,JULY1.



Yourletter,mydearestyounglady,cutsmetotheheart!Whywillyounotletmeknowallyourdistresses?--Yetyouhavesaidenough!

Mysonisverygoodtome.Afewhoursagohewastakenwithafeverishdisorder.ButIhopeitwillgooffhappily,ifhisardourforbusinesswillgivehimtherecessfromitwhichhisgoodmasteriswillingtoallowhim.Hepresentshisdutytoyou,andshedtearsathearingyoursadletterread.

Youhavebeenmisinformedastoyourfamily'sbeingatyouruncleHarlowe's.Theydidnotintendtobethere.Norwasthedaykeptatall.Indeed,theyhavenotstirredout,buttochurch(andthatbutthreetimes)eversincethedayyouwentaway.--Unhappydayforthem,andforallwhoknowyou!--Tome,Iamsure,mostparticularlyso!--Myheartnowbleedsmoreandmoreforyou.

Ihavenotheardasyllableofsuchajourneyasyoumentionedofyourbrother,CaptainSingleton,andMr.Solmes.Therehasbeensometalkindeedofyourbrother'ssettingoutforhisnorthernestates:butIhavenotheardofitlately.

Iamafraidnoletterwillbereceivedfromyou.Itgrievesmetotellyouso,mydearestyounglady.Noevilcanhavehappenedtoyou,whichtheydonotexpecttohearof;sogreatistheirantipathytothewicked

man,andsobadishischaracter.Icannotbutthinkhardlyoftheirunforgiveness:butthereisnojudgingforothersbyone'sself.NeverthelessIwilladd,that,ifyouhadhadasgentlespiritsasmine,theseevilshadneverhappenedeithertothemortoyou.Iknewyourvirtue,andyourloveofvirtue,fromyourverycradle;andIdoubtednotbutthat,withGod'sgrace,wouldalwaysbeyourguard.Butyoucouldneverbedriven;norwasthereoccasiontodriveyou--sogenerous,sonoble,sodiscreet.--Buthowdoesmyloveofyouramiablequalitiesincreasemyaffliction;astheserecollectionsmustdoyour's!

Youareescaped,mydearestMiss--happily,Ihope--thatistosay,with

yourhonour--else,howgreatmustbeyourdistress!--Yet,fromyourletter,Idreadtheworst.

IamveryseldomatHarlowe-place.Thehouseisnotthehouseitusedtobe,sinceyouwentfromit.Thentheyaresorelentless!And,asIcannotsayharshthingsofthebelovedchildofmyheart,aswellasbosom,theydonottakeitamissthatIstayaway.

YourHannahleftherplaceillsometimeago!and,assheisstillathermother'satSt.Alban's,Iamafraidshecontinuesill.Ifso,asyouareamongstrangers,andIcannotencourageyouatpresenttocomeintotheseparts,Ishallthinkitmydutytoattendyou(letitbetakenasitwill)assoonasmyTommy'sindispositionwillpermit;whichIhope

willbesoon.

Ihavealittlemoneybyme.Yousayyouarepooryourself.--Howgrievousarethosewordsfromoneentitledandaccustomedtoaffluence!--Willyoubesogoodtocommandit,mybelovedyounglady?--Itismostofityourownbountytome.AndIshouldtakeapridetorestoreittoitsoriginalowner.

YourPoorblessyou,andprayforyoucontinually.Ihavesomanagedyourlastbenevolence,andtheyhavebeensohealthy,andhavehadsuch



constantemploy,thatithasheldout;andwillholdouttillthehappiertimesreturn,whichIcontinuallyprayfor.

Letmebegofyou,mydearestyounglady,totaketoyourselfallthoseaidswhichgoodpersons,likeyou,drawfromRELIGION,insupportoftheircalamities.Letyoursufferingsbewhattheywill,Iamsureyouhavebeeninnocentinyourintention.Sodonotdespond.Nonearemadetosufferabovewhattheycan,andthereforeoughttobear.

WeknownotthemethodsofProvidence,norwhatwiseendsitmayhavetoserveinitsseemingly-severedispensationstoitspoorcreatures.

Fewpersonshavegreaterreasontosaythisthanmyself.Andsinceweareaptincalamitiestodrawmorecomfortfromexamplethanprecept,youwillpermitmetoremindyouofmyownlot:Forwhohashadagreatershareofafflictionsthanmyself?

Tosaynothingofthelossofanexcellentmother,atatimeoflifewhenmotherlycareismostwanted;thedeathofadearfather,whowasanornamenttohiscloth,(andwhohadqualifiedmetobehisscribeandamanuensis,)justashecamewithinviewofaprefermentwhichwouldhavemadehisfamilyeasy,threwmefriendlessintothewideworld;threwmeuponaverycareless,and,whichwasmuchworse,averyunkindhusband.Poorman!--buthewassparedlongenough,thankGod,inatedious

illness,torepentofhisneglectedopportunities,andhislightprinciples;whichIhavealwaysthoughtofwithpleasure,althoughIwasleftthemoredestituteforhischargeableillness,andreadytobebroughttobed,whenhedied,ofmyTommy.

Butthisverycircumstance,whichIthoughttheunhappiestthatIcouldhavebeenleftin,(soshort-sightedishumanprudence!)becamethehappymeansofrecommendingmetoyourmother,who,inregardtomycharacter,andincompassiontomyverydestitutecircumstances,permittedme,asImadeaconscienceofnotpartingwithmypoorboy,tonursebothyouandhim,bornwithinafewdaysofeachother.AndIhaveneversincewantedanyofthehumbleblessingswhichGodhasmademecontentedwith.

NorhaveIknownwhataverygreatgriefwas,fromthedayofmypoorhusband'sdeathtillthedaythatyourparentstoldmehowmuchtheyweredeterminedthatyoushouldhaveMr.Solmes;whenIwasapprizednotonlyofyouraversiontohim,buthowunworthyhewasofyou:forthenIbegantodreadtheconsequencesofforcingsogenerousaspirit;and,tillthen,IneverfearedMr.Lovelace,attractingaswashisperson,andspecioushismannersandaddress.ForIwassureyouwouldneverhavehim,ifhegaveyounotgoodreasontobeconvincedofhisreformation:nortillyourfriendswereaswellsatisfiedinitasyourself.ButthatunhappymisunderstandingbetweenyourbrotherandMr.Lovelace,andtheirjoiningsoviolentlytoforceyouuponMr.Solmes,didallthatmischief,whichhascostyouandthemsodear,andpoormeallmypeace!Oh!what

hasnotthisungrateful,thisdouble-guiltymantoanswerfor!

Nevertheless,youknownotwhatGodhasinstoreforyouyet!--Butifyouaretobepunishedallyourdayshere,forexamplesake,inacaseofsuchimportance,foryouronefalsestep,bepleasedtoconsider,thatthislifeisbutastateofprobation;andifyouhaveyourpurificationinit,youwillbethemorehappy.NordoubtI,thatyouwillhavethehigherrewardhereafterforsubmittingtothewillofProvidenceherewithpatienceandresignation.



Yousee,mydearestMissClary,thatImakenoscrupletocallthestepyoutookafalseone.Inyouitwaslessexcusablethanitwouldhavebeeninanyotheryounglady;notonlybecauseofyoursuperiortalents,butbecauseoftheoppositionbetweenyourcharacterandhis:sothat,ifyouhadbeenprovokedtoquityourfather'shouse,itneednottohavebeenwithhim.NorneededI,indeed,butasaninstanceofmyimpartiallove,tohavewrittenthistoyou.*

*Mrs.Norton,havingonlythefamilyrepresentationandinvectivestoformherjudgmentupon,knewnotthatClarissahaddeterminedagainstgoingoffwithMr.Lovelace;norhowsolicitousshehadbeentoprocureforherselfanyotherprotectionthanhis,whensheapprehendedthat,ifshestaid,shehadnowaytoavoidbeingmarriedtoMr.Solmes.

Afterthis,itwillhaveanunkind,andperhapsatthistimeanunseasonableappearance,toexpressmyconcernthatyouhavenotbeforefavouredmewithaline.Yetifyoucanaccounttoyourselfforyoursilence,IdaresayIoughttobesatisfied;forIamsureyouloveme:asIbothloveandhonouryou,andeverwill,andthemoreforyourmisfortunes.

Oneconsolation,methinks,Ihave,evenwhenIamsorrowingforyour

calamities;andthatis,thatIknownotanyyoungpersonsoqualifiedtoshinethebrighterforthetrialsshemaybeexercisedwith:andyetitisaconsolationthatendsinaddingtomyregretsforyourafflictions,becauseyouareblessedwithamindsowellabletobearprosperity,andtomakeeverybodyroundyouthebetterforit!--ButIwillforbeartillIknowmore.

Ruminatingoneverythingyourmelancholylettersuggests,andapprehending,fromthegentlenessofyourmind,theamiablenessofyourperson,andyouryouth,thefarthermisfortunesandinconvenienciestowhichyoumaypossiblybesubjected,Icannotconcludewithoutaskingforyourleavetoattendyou,andthatinaveryearnestmanner--andIbegofyounottodenyme,onanyconsiderationrelatingtomyself,orevento

theindispositionofmyotherbelovedchild,ifIcanbeeitherofuseorofcomforttoyou.Wereit,mydearestyounglady,butfortwoorthreedays,permitmetoattendyou,althoughmyson'sillnessshouldincrease,andcompelmetocomedownagainattheendofthosetwoorthreedays.--Irepeatmyrequest,likewise,thatyouwillcommandfrommethelittlesumremaininginthehandsofyourbountytoyourPoor,aswellasthatdispensedto

Yourever-affectionateandfaithfulservant,JUDITHNORTON.

LETTERLVII

MISSCL.HARLOWE,TOLADYBETTYLAWRANCETHURSDAY,JUNE29.

MADAM,

Ihopeyou'llexcusethefreedomofthisaddress,fromonewhohasnotthehonourtobepersonallyknowntoyou,althoughyoumusthaveheard



muchofClarissaHarlowe.ItisonlytobegthefavourofalinefromyourLadyship'shand,(bythenextpost,ifconvenient,)inanswertothefollowingquestions:

1.Whetheryouwrotealetter,dated,asIhaveamemorandum,Wedn.June7,congratulatingyournephewLovelaceonhissupposednuptials,asreportedtoyoubyMr.Spurrier,yourLadyship'ssteward,asfromoneCaptainTomlinson:--andinitreproachingMr.Lovelace,asguiltyofslight,&c.innothavingacquaintedyourLadyshipandthefamilywithhismarriage?

2.WhetheryourladyshipwrotetoMissMontaguetomeetyouatReading,inordertoattendyoutoyourcousinLeeson's,inAlbemarle-street;onyourbeingobligedtobeintownonyouroldchanceryaffair,Irememberarethewords?andwhetheryoubespokeyournephew'sattendancethereonSundaynightthe11th?

3.WhetheryourLadyshipandMissMontaguedidcometotownatthattime;andwhetheryouwenttoHampstead,onMonday,inahiredcoachandfour,yourownbeingrepairing,andtookfromthencetotownwiththeyoungcreaturewhomyouvisitedthere?

YourLadyshipwillprobablyguess,thatthequestionsarenotaskedforreasonsfavourabletoyournephewLovelace.Butbetheanswerwhatit

will,itcandohimnohurt,normeanygood;onlythatIthinkIoweittomyformerhopes,(howeverdeceivedinthem,)andeventocharity,thataperson,ofwhomIwasoncewillingtothinkbetter,shouldnotprovesoegregiouslyabandoned,astobewanting,ineveryinstance,tothatveracitywhichisindispensableinthecharacterofagentleman.

Bepleased,Madam,todirecttome,(keepingthedirectionasecretforthepresent,)tobeleftattheBelle-Savage,onLudgatehill,tillcalledfor.Iam

YourLadyship'smosthumbleservant,CLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLVIII

LADYBETTYLAWRANCE,TOMISSCL.HARLOWESATURDAY,JULY1.

DEARMADAM,

IfindthatallisnotasitshouldbebetweenyouandmynephewLovelace.Itwillverymuchafflictme,andallhisfriends,ifhehasbeenguiltyofanydesignedbasenesstoaladyofyourcharacterand

merit.

Wehavebeenlonginexpectationofanopportunitytocongratulateyouandourselvesuponaneventmostearnestlywishedforbyusall;sinceourhopesofhimarebuiltuponthepoweryouhaveoverhim:forifevermanadoredawoman,heisthatman,andyou,Madam,arethatwoman.

MissMontague,inherlastlettertome,inanswertooneofmine,inquiringifsheknewfromhimwhetherhecouldcallyouhis,orwaslikelysoontohavethathonour,hasthesewords:'Iknownotwhatto



makeofmycousinLovelace,astothepointyourLadyshipissoearnestabout.HesometimessaysheisactuallymarriedtoMissCl.Harlowe:atothertimes,thatitisherownfaultifhebenot.--Hespeaksofhernotonlywithlovebutwithreverence:yetowns,thatthereisamisunderstandingbetweenthem;butconfessesthatsheiswhollyfaultless.Anangel,andnotawoman,hesayssheis:andthatnomanlivingcanbeworthyofher.'--

ThisiswhatmynieceMontaguewrites.

Godgrant,mydearestyounglady,thathemaynothavesoheinouslyoffendedyouthatyoucannotforgivehim!Ifyouarenotalreadymarried,andrefusetobehis,Ishallloseallhopesthatheeverwillmarry,orbethemanIwishhimtobe.SowillLordM.SowillLadySarahSadleir.

Iwillnowansweryourquestions:butindeedIhardlyknowwhattowrite,forfearofwideningstillmoretheunhappydifferencebetweenyou.Butyetsuchayoungladymustcommandeverythingfromme.Thisthenismyanswer:

Iwrotenotanylettertohimonoraboutthe7thofJune.

NeitherInormystewardknowanysuchmanasCaptainTomlinson.

IwrotenottomyniecetomeetmeatReading,nortoaccompanymetomycousinLeeson'sintown.

Mychanceryaffair,though,likemostchanceryaffairs,itbeoflongstanding,is,nevertheless,nowinsogoodaway,thatitcannotgivemeoccasiontogototown.

NorhaveIbeenintownthesesixmonths:noratHampsteadforyears.

NeithershallIhaveanytemptationtogototown,excepttopaymycongratulatorycomplimentstoMrs.Lovelace.OnwhichoccasionI

shouldgowiththegreatestpleasure;andshouldhopeforthefavourofyouraccompanyingmetoGlenham-hall,foramonthatleast.

Bewhatwillthereasonofyourinquiry,letmeentreatyou,mydearyounglady,forLordM.'ssake;formysake;forthisgiddyman'ssake,soulaswellasbody;andforallourfamily'ssakes;nottosufferthisanswertowidendifferencessofarastomakeyourefusehim,ifhealreadyhasnotthehonourofcallingyouhis;asIamapprehensivehehasnot,byyoursigningbyyourfamily-name.

Andhereletmeoffertoyoumymediationtocomposethedifferencebetweenyou,beitwhatitwill.Yourcause,mydearyounglady,cannot

beputintothehandsofanybodylivingmoredevotedtoyourservice,thanintothoseof

Yoursincereadmirer,andhumbleservant,ELIZ.LAWRANCE.

LETTERLIX



MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMRS.HODGESENFIELD,JUNE22.

MRS.HODGES,

Iamunderakindofnecessitytowritetoyou,havingnooneamongmyrelationstowhomIdarewrite,orhopealinefromifIdid.Itisbuttoansweraquestion.Itisthis:

WhetheryouknowanysuchmanasCaptainTomlinson?and,ifyoudo,whetherhebeveryintimatewithmyuncleHarlowe?

Iwilldescribehispersonlest,possibly,heshouldgobyanothernameamongyou;althoughIknownotwhyheshould.

'Heisathin,tallishman,alittlepock-fretten,ofasallowishcomplexion.Fiftyyearsofage,ormore.Ofgoodaspectwhenhelooksup.Heseemstobeaseriousman,andonewhoknowstheworld.Hestoopsalittleintheshoulders.IsofBerkshire.HiswifeofOxfordshire;andhasseveralchildren.HeremovedlatelyintoyourpartsformNorthamptonshire.'

Imustdesireyou,Mrs.Hodges,thatyouwillnotletmyuncle,norany

ofmyrelations,knowthatIwritetoyou.Youusedtosay,thatyouwouldbegladtohaveitinyourpowertoserveme.That,indeed,wasinmyprosperity.But,Idaresay,youwillnotrefusemeinaparticularthatwillobligeme,withouthurtingyourself.

Iunderstandthatmyfather,mother,andsister,andIpresume,mybrother,andmyuncleAntony,aretobeatmyuncleHarlowe'sthisday.Godpreservethemall,andmaytheyrejoiceinmanyhappybirth-days!Youwillwritesixwordstomeconcerningtheirhealths.

Direct,foraparticularreason,toMrs.DorothySalcombe,tobelefttillcalledfor,attheFourSwansInn,Bishopsgate-street.

Youknowmyhand-writingwellenough,werenotthecontentsofthelettersufficienttoexcusemyname,oranyothersubscription,thanthatof

Yourfriend.

LETTERLX

MRS.HODGES[INANSWER.]SAT.JULY2.

MADDAM,

Ireturnyouananser,asyouwishmetodoe.Masterisacquentedwithnositchman.Iamshurenositchevercametoourhouse.Andmasterstursverylittleout.Hehasnohartetosturout.Forwhy?Yourobstinacymakesumnotcaretoseeoneanother.Master'sbirth-dayneverwaskeptsoebefore:fornotasoleheere:andnothingbutsikeingandsorrowinfrommastertothinkhowityusedtobee.



Iaxedmaster,ifsoebeeheknowedsitchamanasoneCaptainTomlinson?butsaidnotwhirforIaxed.Hesed,No,nothe.

ShurethisisnotrixnorforgerybruingagainstmasterbyoneTomlinson--Wonknowsnotwhatcompanyyoumayhavebeenforsedtokeep,senyouwentaway,youknoe,Maddam;butLundonisapestilentplase;andthat'SquireLuvlessisadevil(forallheissitchalikegentlemantolookto)asIhevherdeveryboddysay;andthinkashowyouhavefoundbythiss.

Itruste,Maddam,youwuldenotletmastercumtoharme,ifyouknoedit,byanybodywhomaypretendtobeacquentedwithhim:butforfere,IqueridwithmyselfifIshuldenottellhim.ButIwaswillintoshowyou,thatIwuldeplessureyouinadvarsity,ifadvarsitybeyourlott,aswellasprosperity;forIamnoneofthosethatwouldedoeotherwiss.Soenomorefrom

Yourhumblesarvent,towishyouwell,SARAHHODGES.

LETTERLXI

MISSCL.HARLOWE,TOLADYBETTYLAWRANCE.MONDAY,JULY3.

MADAM,

IcannotexcusemyselffromgivingyourLadyshipthisonetroublemore;tothankyou,asImostheartilydo,foryourkindletter.

Imustowntoyou,Madam,thatthehonourofbeingrelatedtoladiesaseminentfortheirvirtueasfortheirdescent,wasatfirstnosmallinducementwithmetolendaneartoMr.Lovelace'saddress.Andthe

rather,asIwasdetermined,haditcometoeffect,todoeverythinginmypowertodeserveyourfavourableopinion.

Ihadanothermotive,whichIknewwouldofitselfgivememeritwithyourwholefamily;apresumptuousone,(apunishablypresumptuousone,asithasproved,)inthehopethatImightbeanhumblemeaninthehandofProvidencetoreclaimaman,whohad,asIthought,goodsenseenoughtoacknowledgetheintendedobligation,whetherthegeneroushopeweretosucceedornot.

ButIhavebeenmostegregiouslymistakeninMr.Lovelace;theonlyman,Ipersuademyself,pretendingtobeagentleman,inwhomIcouldhavebeensomuchmistaken:forwhileIwasendeavouringtosaveadrowning

wretch,Ihavebeen,notaccidentally,butpremeditatedly,andofsetpurpose,drawninafterhim.Andhehashadtheglorytoaddtothelistofthosehehasruined,aname,that,Iwillbeboldtosay,wouldnothavedisparagedhisown.Andthis,Madam,bymeansthatwouldshockhumanitytobemadeacquaintedwith.

MywholeendisservedbyyourLadyship'sanswertothequestionsItookthelibertytoputtoyouinwriting.NorhaveIawishtomaketheunhappymanmoreodioustoyouthanisnecessarytoexcusemyselfforabsolutelydecliningyourofferedmediation.



WhenyourLadyshipshallbeinformedofthefollowingparticulars:

Thatafterhehadcompulsorily,asImaysay,trickedmeintotheactofgoingoffwithhim,hecouldcarrymetooneofthevilesthouses,asitproved,inLondon:

Thathecouldbeguiltyofawickedattempt,inresentmentofwhich,IfoundmeanstoescapefromhimtoHampstead:

That,afterhehadfoundmeoutthere(Iknownothow)hecouldprocuretwowomen,dressedoutrichly,topersonateyourLadyshipandMissMontague;who,underpretenceofengagingmetomakeavisitintowntoyourcousinLeeson,(promisingtoreturnwithmethateveningtoHampstead,)betrayedmebackagaintothevilehouse:where,againmadeaprisoner,Iwasfirstrobbedofmysenses;andthenofmyhonour.WhyshouldIseektoconcealthatdisgracefromotherswhichIcannothidefrommyself?

WhenyourLadyshipshallknow,that,intheshockingprogresstothisruin,wilfulfalsehoods,repeatedforgeries,(particularlyofoneletterfromyourLadyship,anotherfromMissMontague,andathirdfromLordM.)andnumberlessperjuries,werenottheleastofhiscrimes:youwilljudge,thatIcanhavenoprinciplesthatwillmakemeworthyofan

alliancewithladiesofyour'sandyournoblesister'scharacter,ifIcouldnotfrommysouldeclare,thatsuchanalliancecannevernowtakeplace.

Iwillnotoffertoclearmyselfentirelyofblame:but,astohim,Ihavenofaulttoaccusemyselfof:mycrimewas,thecorrespondingwithhimatfirst,whenprohibitedsotodobythosewhohadarighttomyobedience;madestillmoreinexcusable,bygivinghimaclandestinemeeting,whichputmeintothepowerofhisarts.AndforthisIamcontenttobepunished:thankful,thatatlastIhaveescapedfromhim;andhaveitinmypowertorejectsowickedamanformyhusband:andglad,ifImaybeawarning,sinceIcannotbeanexample:whichonce(veryvain,andveryconceited,asIwas)Iproposedtomyselftobe.

AlltheillIwishhimis,thathemayreform;andthatImaybethelastvictimtohisbaseness.Perhapsthisdesirablewishmaybeobtained,whenheshallseehowhiswickedness,hisunmeritedwickedness!toapoorcreature,madefriendlessbyhiscruelarts,willend.

IconcludewithmyhumblethankstoyourLadyshipforyourfavourableopinionofme;andwiththeassurancethatIwillbe,whilelifeislentme,

YourLadyship'sgratefulandobligedservant,CLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLXII

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMRS.NORTONSUNDAYEVENING,JULY2.

Howkindly,mybelovedMrs.Norton,doyousoothetheanguishofableedingheart!Surelyyouaremineownmother;and,bysome



unaccountablemistake,Imusthavebeenlaidtoafamilythat,havingnewlyfoundout,oratleastsuspected,theimposture,castmefromtheirhearts,withtheindignationthatsuchadiscoverywillwarrant.

Oh!thatIhadbeenindeedyourownchild,borntopartakeofyourhumblefortunes,anheiressonlytothatcontentinwhichyouaresohappy!thenshouldIhavehadatrulygentlespirittohaveguidedmyductileheart,whichforceandungeneroususagesitsoillupon:andnothingofwhathashappenedwouldhavebeen.

ButletmetakeheedthatIenlargenot,byimpatience,thebreachalreadymadeinmydutybymyrashness!since,hadInoterred,mymother,atleast,couldneverhavebeenthoughthard-heartedandunforgiving.AmInotthenanswerable,notonlyformyownfaults,butfortheconsequencesofthem;whichtendtodepreciateandbringdisgraceuponamaternalcharacterneverbeforecalledinquestion?

Itiskind,however,inyoutoendeavourtoextenuatethefaultsofonesogreatlysensibleofit:andcoulditbewipedoffentirely,itwouldrendermemoreworthyofthepainsyouhavetakeninmyeducation:foritmustaddtoyourgrief,asitdoestomyconfusion,that,aftersuchpromisingbeginnings,Ishouldhavesobehavedastobeadisgraceinsteadofacredittoyouandmyotherfriends.

ButthatImaynotmakeyouthinkmemoreguiltythanIam,givemeleavebrieflytoassureyou,that,whenmystoryisknown,Ishallbetomorecompassionthanblame,evenonthescoreofgoingawaywithMr.Lovelace.

Astoallthathappenedafterwards,letmeonlysay,thatalthoughImustcallmyselfalostcreatureastothisworld,yethaveIthisconsolationleftme,thatIhavenotsufferedeitherforwantofcircumspection,orthroughcarefulcredulityorweakness.NotonemomentwasIoffmyguard,orunmindfulofyourearlyprecepts.But(havingbeenenabledtobafflemanybasecontrivances)Iwasatlastruinedbyartsthemostinhuman.ButhadInotbeenrejectedbyeveryfriend,thislow-heartedmanhadnotdared,norwouldhavehadopportunity,totreatmeashehas

treatedme.

MoreIcannot,atthistime,norneedIsay:andthisIdesireyoutokeeptoyourself,lestresentmentsshouldbetakenupwhenIamgone,thatmayspreadtheevilwhichIhopewillendwithme.

Ihavebeenmisinformed,yousay,astomyprincipalrelationsbeingatmyuncleHarlowe's.Theday,yousay,wasnotkept.NorhavemybrotherandMr.Solmes--Astonishing!--Whatcomplicatedwickednesshasthiswretchedmantoanswerfor!--WereItotellyou,youwouldhardlybelievethattherecouldhavebeensuchaheartinman.--

Butonedayyoumayknowthewholestory!--AtpresentIhaveneither

inclinationnorwords--Omyburstingheart!--Yetahappy,awishedrelief!--Wereyoupresentmytearswouldsupplytherest!

***

Iresumemypen!

Andsoyoufearnoletterwillbereceivedfromme.ButDON'Tgrieveto



tellmeso!Iexpecteverythingbad--andsuchismydistress,thathadyounotbidmehopeformercyfromthethroneofmercy,Ishouldhavebeenafraidthatmyfather'sdreadfulcursewouldbecompletedwithregardtobothworlds.

Forhere,anadditionalmisfortune!--Inafitofphrensicalheedlessness,IsentalettertomybelovedMissHowe,withoutrecollectingherprivateaddress;andithasfallenintoherangrymother'shands:andsothatdearfriendperhapshasanewincurreddispleasureonmyaccount.Andheretooyourworthysonisill;andmypoorHannah,youthink,cannotcometome--OmydearMrs.Norton,willyou,canyoucensurethosewhoseresentmentsagainstmeHeavenseemstoapproveof?andwillyouacquitherwhomthatcondemns?

Yetyoubidmenotdespond.--Iwillnot,ifIcanhelpit.And,indeed,mostseasonableconsolationhasyourkindletteraffordedme.--YettoGodAlmightydoIappeal,toavengemywrongs,andvindicatemyinno----

Buthushedbemystormypassions!--HaveInotbutthismomentsaidthatyourlettergavemeconsolation?--Maythosebeforgivenwhohindermyfatherfromforgivingme!--andthis,astothem,shallbetheharshestthingthatshalldropfrommypen.

Butalthoughyoursonshouldrecover,Ichargeyou,mydearMrs.Norton,

thatyoudonotthinkofcomingtome.Idon'tknowstillbutyourmediationwithmymother(althoughatpresentyourinterpositionwouldbesolittleattendedto)maybeofusetoprocuremetherevocationofthatmostdreadfulpartofmyfather'scurse,whichonlyremainstobefulfilled.ThevoiceofNaturemustatlastbeheardinmyfavour,surely.Itwillonlypleadatfirsttomyfriendsinthestillconsciousplaintivenessofayoungandunhardenedbeggar.ButitwillgrowmoreclamorouswhenIhavethecouragetobeso,andshalldemand,perhaps,thepaternalprotectionfromfartherruin;andthatforgiveness,whichthosewillbelittleentitledtoexpect,fortheirownfaults,whoshallinterposetohaveitrefusedtome,foranaccidental,notapremeditatederror:andwhich,butforthem,Ihadneverfalleninto.

Butagain,impatiency,foundedperhapsonself-partiality,thatstrangemisleader!prevails.

Letmebrieflysay,thatitisnecessarytomypresentandfuturehopesthatyoukeepwellwithmyfamily.Andmoreover,shouldyoucome,Imaybetracedoutbythatmeansbythemostabandonedofmen.Saynotthenthatyouthinkyououghttocomeuptome,letitbetakenasitwill:--Formysake,letmerepeat,(weremyfoster-brotherrecovered,asIhopeheis,)youmustnotcome.NorcanIwantyouradvice,whileIcanwrite,andyoucananswerme.AndwriteIwillasoftenasIstandinneedofyourcounsel.

ThenthepeopleIamnowwithseemtobebothhonestandhumane:and

thereisinthesamehouseawidow-lodger,oflowfortunes,butofgreatmerit:--almostsuchanotherseriousandgoodwomanasthedearonetowhomIamnowwriting;whohas,asshesays,givenoverallotherthoughtsoftheworldbutsuchasshouldassisthertoleaveithappily.--Howsuitabletomyownviews!--Thereseemstobeacomfortableprovidenceinthisatleast--sothatatpresentthereisnothingofexigence;nothingthatcanrequire,orevenexcuse,yourcoming,whensomanybetterendsmaybeansweredbyyourstayingwhereyouare.Atimemaycome,whenIshallwantyourlastandbestassistance:andthen,mydearMrs.Norton--andthen,Iwillspeakit,andembraceitwithallmy



wholeheart--andthen,willitnotbedeniedmebyanybody.

Youareveryobliginginyourofferofmoney.ButalthoughIwasforcedtoleavemyclothesbehindme,yetItookseveralthingsofvaluewithme,whichwillkeepmefrompresentwant.You'llsay,Ihavemadeamiserablehandofit--soindeedIhave--and,tolookbackwards,inaverylittlewhiletoo.

ButwhatshallIdo,ifmyfathercannotbeprevailedupontorecallhismalediction?OmydearMrs.Norton,whataweightmustafather'scursehaveuponaheartsoappreciativeasmine!--DidIthinkIshouldeverhaveafather'scursetodeprecate?Andyet,onlythatthetemporarypartofitissoterriblyfulfilled,orIshouldbeasearnestforitsrecall,formyfather'ssake,asformyown!

YoumustnotbeangrywithmethatIwrotenottoyoubefore.YouareveryrightandverykindtosayyouaresureIloveyou.IndeedIdo.Andwhatagenerosity,[solikeyourself!]isthereinyourpraise,toattributetomemorethanImerit,inordertoraiseanemulationtometodeserveyourpraises!--youtellmewhatyouexpectfrommeinthecalamitiesIamcalledupontobear.MayIbehaveanswerably!

Icanalittleaccounttomyselfformysilencetoyou,mykind,mydearmaternalfriend!Howequallysweetlyandpolitelydoyouexpress

yourselfonthisoccasion!Iwasverydesirous,foryoursake,aswellasformyown,thatyoushouldhaveittosaythatwedidnotcorrespond:hadtheythoughtwedid,everywordyoucouldhavedroptinmyfavourwouldhavebeenrejected;andmymotherwouldhavebeenforbidtoseeyou,orpayanyregardtowhatyoushouldsay.

ThenIhadsometimesbetterandsometimesworseprospectsbeforeme.Myworstwouldonlyhavetroubledyoutoknow:mybettermademefrequentlyhope,that,bythenextpost,orthenext,andsoonforweeks,Ishouldhavethebestnewstoimparttoyouthatthencouldhappen:coldasthewretchhadmademyhearttothatbest.--ForhowcouldIthinktowritetoyou,withaconfessionthatIwasnotmarried,yetlivedinthehouse(forIcouldnothelpit)withsuchaman?--Wholikewisehadgivenitout

toseveral,thatwewereactuallymarried,althoughwithrestrictionsthatdependedonthereconciliationwithmyfriends?Andtodisguisethetruth,orbeguiltyofafalsehood,eitherdirectorequivocal,thatwaswhatyouhadnevertaughtme.

ButImighthavewrittentoyouforadvice,inmyprecarioussituation,perhapsyouwillthink.But,indeed,mydearMrs.Norton,Iwasnotlostforwantofadvice.AndthiswillappearcleartoyoufromwhatIhavealreadyhinted,wereItoexplainmyselfnofurther:--Forwhatneedhadthecruelspoilertohaverecoursetounprecedentedarts--Iwillspeakoutplainerstill,(butyoumustnotatpresentreportit,)tostupifyingpotions,andtothemostbrutalandoutrageousforce,hadIbeenwantinginmyduty?

Afewwordsmoreuponthisgrievoussubject--

WhenIreflectuponallthathashappenedtome,itisapparent,thatthisgenerally-supposedthoughtlessseducerhasactedbymeuponaregularandpreconcertedplanofvillany.

Inordertosetallhisvileplotsinmotion,nothingwaswanting,fromthefirst,buttoprevailuponme,eitherbyforceorfraud,tothrowmyselfintohispower:andwhenthiswaseffected,nothinglessthanthe



interventionofthepaternalauthority,(whichIhadnotdeservedtobeexertedinmybehalf,)couldhavesavedmefromtheeffectofhisdeepmachinations.Oppositionfromanyotherquarterwouldbuttooprobablyhaveprecipitatedhisbarbarousandungratefulviolence:andhadyouyourselfbeenwithme,Ihavereasonnowtothink,thatsomehoworotheryouwouldhavesufferedinendeavouringtosaveme:forneverwasthere,asnowIsee,aplanofwickednessmoresteadilyanduniformlypursuedthanhishasbeen,againstanunhappycreaturewhomeritedbetterofhim:buttheAlmightyhasthoughtfit,accordingtothegeneralcourseofHisprovidence,tomakethefaultbringonitsownpunishment:butsurelynotinconsequenceofmyfather'sdreadfulimprecation,'ThatImightbepunishedhere,'[OmymammaNorton,praywithme,ifso,thathereitstop!]'bytheverywretchinwhomIhadplacedmywickedconfidence!'

Iamsorry,foryoursake,toleaveoffsoheavily.Yettherestmustbebrief.

LetmedesireyoutobesecretinwhatIhavecommunicatedtoyou;atleasttillyouhavemyconsenttodivulgeit.

Godpreservetoyouyourmorefaultlesschild!

IwillhopeforHismercy,althoughIshouldnotobtainthatofanyearthlyperson.

AndIrepeatmyprohibition:--Youmustnotthinkofcomingupto

YoureverdutifulCL.HARLOWE.

Theobligingperson,wholeftyour'sformethisday,promisedtocallto-morrow,toseeifIshouldhaveanythingtoreturn.Iwouldnotlosesogoodanopportunity.

LETTERLXIII

MRS.NORTON,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWEMONDAYNIGHT,JULY3.

Othebarbarousvillanyofthisdetestableman!Andisthereamanintheworldwhocouldofferviolencetososweetacreature!

Andareyousureyouarenowoutofhisreach?

Youcommandmetokeepsecrettheparticularsoftheviletreatmentyouhavemetwith;orelse,uponanunexpectedvisitwhichMissHarlowefavouredmewith,soonafterIhadreceivedyourmelancholyletter,I

shouldhavebeentemptedtoownIhadheardfromyou,andtohavecommunicatedtohersuchpartsofyourtwolettersaswouldhavedemonstratedyourpenitence,andyourearnestnesstoobtaintherevocationofyourfather'smalediction,aswellashisprotectionfromoutragesthatmaystillbeofferedtoyou.Butthenyoursisterwouldprobablyhaveexpectedasightoftheletters,andeventohavebeenpermittedtotakethemwithhertothefamily.

Yettheymustonedaybeacquaintedwiththesadstory:--anditisimpossiblebuttheymustpityyou,andforgiveyou,whentheyknowyour



earlypenitence,andyourunprecedentedsufferings;andthatyouhavefallenbythebrutalforceofabarbarousravisher,andnotbythevileartsofaseducinglover.

ThewickedmangivesitoutatLordM.'s,asMissHarlowetellsme,thatheisactuallymarriedtoyou--yetshebelievesitnot:norhadIthehearttoletherknowthetruth.

Sheputitclosetome,WhetherIhadnotcorrespondedwithyoufromthetimeofyourgoingaway?Icouldsafelytellher,(asIdid,)thatIhadnot:butIsaid,thatIwaswellinformed,thatyoutookextremelytoheartyourfather'simprecation;andthat,ifshewouldexcuseme,Iwouldsayitwouldbeakindandsisterlypart,ifshewoulduseherinteresttogetyoudischargedfromit.

Amongotherseverethings,shetoldme,thatmypartialfondnessforyoumademeverylittleconsiderthehonouroftherestofthefamily:but,ifIhadnotheardthisfromyou,shesupposedIwassetonbyMissHowe.

Sheexpressedherselfwithagooddealofbitternessagainstthatyounglady:who,itseems,everywhere,andtoeverybody,(foryoumustthinkthatyourstoryisthesubjectofallconversations,)railsagainstyourfamily;treatingthem,asyoursistersays,withcontempt,andevenwithridicule.

Iamsorrysuchangryfreedomsaretaken,fortworeasons;first,becausesuchlibertiesneverdoanygood.Ihaveheardyouown,thatMissHowehasasatiricalvein;butIshouldhopethatayoungladyofhersense,andrightcastofmind,mustknowthattheendofsatireisnottoexasperate,butamend;andshouldneverbepersonal.Ifitbe,asmygoodfatherusedtosay,itmaymakeanimpartialpersonsuspectthatthesatiristhasanaturalspleentogratify;whichmaybeasgreatafaultinhim,asanyofthosewhichhepretendstocensureandexposeinothers.

Perhapsahintofthisfromyouwillnotbethrownaway.

Mysecondreasonis,Thatthesefreedoms,fromsowarmafriendtoyouasMissHoweisknowntobe,aremostlikelytobechargedtoyouraccount.

Myresentmentsaresostrongagainstthisvilestofmen,thatIdarenottouchupontheshockingparticularswhichyoumentionofhisbaseness.Whatdefence,indeed,couldtherebeagainstsodeterminedawretch,afteryouwasinhispower?Iwillonlyrepeatmyearnestsupplicationtoyou,that,blackasappearancesare,youwillnotdespair.Yourcalamitiesareexceedinggreat;butthenyouhavetalentsproportionedtoyourtrials.Thiseverybodyallows.

Supposetheworst,andthatyourfamilywillnotbemovedinyourfavour,yourcousinMordenwillsoonarrive,asMissHarlowetoldme.Ifhe

shouldevenbegotovertotheirside,hewillhoweverseejusticedoneyou;andthenmayyouliveanexemplarylife,makinghundredshappy,andteachingyoungladiestoshunthesnaresinwhichyouhavebeensodreadfullyentangled.

Astothemanyouhavelost,isanunionwithsuchaperjuredheartashis,withsuchanadmirableoneasyour's,tobewishedfor?Abase,low-heartedwretch,asyoujustlycallhim,withallhisprideofancestry;andmoreanenemytohimselfwithregardtohispresentandfuturehappinessthantoyou,inthebarbarousandungratefulwrongshe



hasdoneyou:Ineednot,Iamsure,exhortyoutodespisesuchamanasthis,sincenottobeabletodoso,wouldbeareflectionuponasextowhichyouhavealwaysbeenanhonour.

Yourmoralcharacterisuntainted:theverynatureofyoursufferings,asyouwillobserve,demonstratesthat.Cheerup,therefore,yourdearheart,anddonotdespair;forisitnotGODwhogovernstheworld,andpermitssomethings,anddirectsothers,asHepleases?andwillHenotrewardtemporarysufferings,innocentlyincurred,andpiouslysupported,witheternalfelicity?--Andwhat,mydear,isthispoorneedle'spointofNOWtoaboundlesseternity?

Myheart,however,laboursunderadoubleaffliction:Formypoorboyisvery,verybad--aviolentfever--norcanitbebroughttointermit.--Prayforhim,mydearestMiss--forhisrecovery,ifGodseefit.--IhopeGodwillseefit--ifnot(howcanIbeartosupposethat!)Prayforme,thathewillgivemethatpatienceandresignationwhichIhavebeenwishingtoyou.Iam,mydearestyounglady,

YoureveraffectionateJUDITHNORTON.

LETTERLXIVMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMRS.JUDITHNORTONTHURSDAY,JULY6.

Ioughtnot,especiallyatthistime,toaddtoyourafflictions--butyetIcannothelpcommunicatingtoyou(whonowaremyonlysoothingfriend)anewtroublethathasbefallenme.

Ihadbutonefriendintheworld,besideyou;andsheisutterlydispleasedwithme.*Itisgrievous,butforonemoment,tolieunderabelovedperson'scensure;andthisthroughimputationsthataffectone's

honourandprudence.Therearepointssodelicate,youknow,mydearMrs.Norton,thatitisadegreeofdishonourtohaveavindicationofone'sselffromthemappeartobenecessary.Inthepresentcase,mymisfortuneis,thatIknownothowtoaccount,butbyguess(sosubtlehavebeentheworkingsofthedarkspiritIhavebeenunhappilyentangledby)forsomeofthefactsthatIamcalledupontoexplain.

MissHowe,inshort,supposesshehasfoundaflawinmycharacter.Ihavejustnowreceivedhersevereletter--butIshallanswerit,perhaps,inbettertemper,ifIfirstconsideryour's:forindeedmypatienceisalmostatanend.AndyetIoughttoconsider,thatfaithfularethewoundsofafriend.Butsomanythingsatonce!OmydearMrs.Norton,howshallsoyoungascholarintheschoolofafflictionbeabletobear

suchheavyandsuchvariousevils!

Buttoleavethissubjectforawhile,andturntoyourletter.

IamverysorryMissHoweissolivelyinherresentmentsonmyaccount.Ihavealwaysblamedherveryfreelyforherlibertiesofthissortwithmyfriends.Ioncehadagooddealofinfluenceoverherkindheart,andshemadeallIsaidalawtoher.Butpeopleincalamityhavelittleweightinanything,orwithanybody.Prosperityandindependencearecharmingthingsonthisaccount,thattheygiveforcetothecounselsof



afriendlyheart;whileitisthoughtinsolenceinthemiserabletoadvise,orsomuchastoremonstrate.

YetisMissHoweaninvaluableperson:AndisittobeexpectedthatsheshouldpreservethesameregardformyjudgmentthatshehadbeforeIforfeitedalltitletodiscretion?WithwhatfacecanItakeuponmetoreproachawantofprudenceinher?ButifIcanbesohappyastore-establishmyselfinherever-valuedopinion,Ishallendeavourtoenforceuponheryourjustobservationonthishead.

Youneednot,yousay,exhortmetodespisesuchamanashim,bywhomIhavesuffered--indeedyouneednot:forIwouldchoosethecruellestdeathratherthantobehis.Andyet,mydearMrs.Norton,Iwillowntoyou,thatonceIcouldhavelovedhim.--Ungratefulman!--hadhepermittedmetolovehim,Ioncecouldhavelovedhim.Yetheneverdeservedlove.Andwasnotthisafault?--Butnow,ifIcanbutkeepoutofhishands,andobtainalastforgiveness,andthataswellforthesakeofmydearfriends'futurereflections,asformyownpresentcomfort,itisallIwishfor.

ReconciliationwithmyfriendsIdonotexpect;norpardonfromthem;atleast,tillinextremity,andasaviaticum.

OmybelovedMrs.Norton,youcannotimaginewhatIhavesuffered!--But

indeedmyheartisbroken!--IamsureIshallnotlivetotakepossessionofthatindependence,whichyouthinkwouldenablemetoatone,insomemeasure,formypastconduct.

Whilethisismyopinion,youmaybelieveIshallnotbeeasytillIcanobtainalastforgiveness.

Iwishtobelefttotakemyowncourseinendeavouringtoprocurethisgrace.YetknowInot,atpresent,whatthatcourseshallbe.

Iwillwrite.Buttowhomismydoubt.CalamityhasnotyetgivenmetheassurancetoaddressmyselftomyFATHER.MyUNCLES(wellastheyoncelovedme)arehardhearted.Theyneverhadtheirmasculinepassions

humanizedbythetendernameofFATHER.OfmyBROTHERIhavenohope.IhavethenbutmyMOTHER,andmySISTER,towhomIcanapply.--'AndmayInot,mydearestMamma,bepermittedtoliftupmytremblingeyetoyourall-cheering,andyouroncemorethanindulgent,yourfondeye,inhopesofseasonablemercytothepoorsickheartthatyetbeatswithlifedrawnfromyourowndearerheart?--Especiallywhenpardononly,andnotrestoration,isimplored?'

YetwereIabletoengagemymother'spity,woulditnotbeameantomakeherstillmoreunhappythanIhavealreadymadeher,bytheoppositionshewouldmeetwith,wereshetotrytogiveforcetothatpity?

TomySISTER,then,Ithink,Iwillapply--Yethowhard-heartedhasmysisterbeen!--ButIwillnotaskforprotection;andyetIaminhourlydreadthatIshallwantprotection.--AllIwillaskforatpresent(preparativetothelastforgivenessIwillimplore)shallbeonlytobefreedfromtheheavycursethatseemstohaveoperatedasfarisitcanoperateastothislife--and,surely,itwaspassion,andnotintention,thatcarrieditsofarastotheother!

ButwhydoIthusaddtoyourdistresses?--Itisnot,mydearMrs.Norton,thatIhavesomuchfeelingformyowncalamitythatIhavenone



foryour's:sinceyour'sisindeedanadditiontomyown.Butyouhaveoneconsolation(averygreatone)whichIhavenot:--Thatyourafflictions,whetherrespectingyourmoreoryourlessdeservingchild,risenotfromanyfaultofyourown.

ButwhatcanIdoforyoumorethanpray?--Assureyourself,thatineverysupplicationIputupformyself,Iwillwithequalfervourrememberbothyouandyourson.ForIamandeverwillbe

YourtrulysympathisinganddutifulCLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLXV

MISSHOWE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[SUPERSCRIBEDFORMRS.RACHELCLARK,&c.]WEDNESDAY,JULY5.

MYDEARCLARISSA,

IhaveatlastheardfromyoufromaquarterIlittleexpected.

Frommymother!

Shehadforsometimeseenmeuneasyandgrieving;andjustlysupposeditwasaboutyou:andthismorningdroptahint,whichmademeconjecturethatshemusthaveheardsomethingofyoumorethanIknew.Andwhenshefoundthatthisaddedtomyuneasiness,sheownedshehadaletterinherhandsofyour's,datedthe29thofJune,directedforme.

Youmayguess,thatthisoccasionedalittlewarmth,thatcouldnotbewishedforbyeither.

[Itissurprising,mydear,mightysurprising!thatknowingthe

prohibitionIlayunderofcorrespondingwithyou,youcouldsendaletterformetoourownhouse:sinceitmustbefiftytoonethatitwouldfallintomymother'shands,asyoufinditdid.]

Inshort,sheresentedthatIshoulddisobeyher:Iwasasmuchconcernedthatsheshouldopenandwithholdfrommemyletters:andatlastshewaspleasedtocompromisethematterwithmebygivinguptheletter,andpermittingmetowritetoyouonceortwice:shetoseethecontentsofwhatIwrote.For,besidesthevalueshehasforyou,shecouldnotbuthavegreatercuriositytoknowtheoccasionofsosadasituationasyourmelancholylettershowsyoutobein.

[ButIshallgethertobesatisfiedwithhearingmereadwhatIwrite;

puttinginbetweenhooks,thus[],whatIintendnottoreadtoher.]

NeedItoremindyou,MissClarissaHarlowe,ofthreelettersIwrotetoyou,tononeofwhichIhadanyanswer;excepttothefirst,andthatofafewlinesonly,promisingaletteratlarge,thoughyouwerewellenough,thedayafteryoureceivedmysecond,togojoyfullybackagainwithhimtothevilehouse?Butmoreoftheseby-and-by.ImusthastentotakenoticeofyourletterofWednesdaylastweek;whichyoucouldcontriveshouldfallintomymother'shands.



Letmetellyou,thatthatletterhasalmostbrokenmyheart.GoodGod!--Whathaveyoubroughtyourselfto,MissClarissaHarlowe?--CouldIhavebelieved,thatafteryouhadescapedfromthemiscreant,(withsuchmightypainsandearnestnessescaped,)andaftersuchanattemptashehadmade,youwouldhavebeenprevaileduponnotonlytoforgivehim,but(withoutbeingmarriedtoo)toreturnwithhimtothathorridhouse!--AhouseIhadgivenyousuchanaccountof!--Surprising!----Whatanintoxicatingthingisthislove?--Ialwaysfeared,thatyou,evenyou,werenotproofagainstitsinconsistenteffects.

Youyourbestselfhavenotescaped!--IndeedIseenothowyoucouldexpecttoescape.

Whatatalehaveyoutounfold!--Youneednotunfoldit,mydear:Iwouldhaveengagedtoprognosticateallthathashappened,hadyoubuttoldmethatyouwouldoncemorehaveputyourselfinhispower,afteryouhadtakensuchpainstogetoutofit.

Yourpeaceisdestroyed!--Iwondernotatit:sincenowyoumustreproachyourselfforacredulitysoill-placed.

Yourintellectistouched!--Iamsuremyheartbleedsforyou!But,excuseme,mydear,IdoubtyourintellectwastouchedbeforeyouleftHampstead:oryouwouldneverhavelethimfindyououtthere;or,when

hedid,sufferhimtoprevailuponyoutoreturntothehorridbrothel.Itellyou,Isentyouthreeletters:Thefirstofwhich,datedthe7thand8thofJune*(foritwaswrittenattwice)camesafelytoyourhands,asyousentmewordbyafewlinesdatedthe9th:haditnot,Ishouldhavedoubtedmyownsafety;sinceinitIgiveyousuchanaccountoftheabominablehouse,andthrewsuchcautionsinyourway,inrelationtothatTomlinson,asthemoresurprisedmethatyoucouldthinkofgoingbacktoitagain,afteryouhadescapedfromit,andfromLovelace.--Omydear--butnothingnowwillIeverwonderat!

*SeeVol.V.LetterXX.

Thesecond,datedJune10,*wasgivenintoyourownhandatHampstead,onSundaythe11th,asyouwaslyinguponacouch,inastrangeway,accordingtomymessenger'saccountofyou,bloated,andflush-coloured;Idon'tknowhow.

*SeeLetterVII.ofthisvolume.

Thethirdwasdatedthe20thofJune.*Havingnotheardonewordfromyousincethepromisingbilletofthe9th,IownIdidnotspareyouin

it.Iventureditbytheusualconveyance,bythatWilson's,havingnoother:socannotbesureyoureceivedit.IndeedIratherthinkyoumightnot;becauseinyour's,whichfellintomymother'shands,youmakenomentionofit:andifyouhadhadit,Ibelieveitwouldhavetouchedyoutoomuchtohavebeenpassedbyunnoticed.

*SeeLetterXXX.ofthisvolume.



Youhaveheard,thatIhavebeenill,yousay.Ihadacold,indeed;butitwassoslightaonethatitconfinedmenotanhour.ButIdoubtnotthatstrangethingsyouhaveheard,andbeentold,toinduceyoutotakethestepyoutook.And,tillyoudidtakethatstep(thegoingbackwiththisvillain,Imean,)Iknewnotamorepitiablecasethanyour's:sinceeverybodymusthaveexcusedyoubefore,whoknewhowyouwereusedathome,andwasacquaintedwithyourprudenceandvigilance.But,alas!mydear,weseethatthewisestpeoplearenottobedependedupon,whenlove,likeanignisfatuus,holdsupitsmisleadinglightsbeforetheireyes.

Mymothertellsme,shesentyouananswer,desiringyounottowritetome,becauseitwouldgrieveme.TobesureIamgrieved;exceedinglygrieved;and,disappointedtoo,youmustpermitmetosay.ForIhadalwaysthoughtthatthereneverwassuchawoman,atyouryears,intheworld.

ButIrememberonceanargumentyouheld,onoccasionofacensurepassedincompanyuponanexcellentpreacher,whowasnotaveryexcellentliver:preachingandpractising,yousaid,requiredverydifferenttalents:*which,whenunitedinthesameperson,madethemanasaint;aswitandjudgment,goingtogether,constitutedagenius.

*SeeVol.II.LetterIV.

Youmadeitout,Iremember,veryprettily:butyounevermadeitout,excuseme,mydear,moreconvincingly,thanbythatpartofyourlateconduct,whichIcomplainof.

Myloveforyou,andmyconcernforyourhonour,maypossiblyhavemademealittleoftheseverest.Ifyouthinkso,placeittoitsproperaccount;tothatlove,andtothatconcern:whichwillbutdojusticeto

Yourafflictedandfaithful

A.H.

P.S.Mymotherwouldnotbesatisfiedwithoutreadingmyletterherself;andthatbeforeIhadfixedalltheproposedhooks.Sheknows,bythismeans,andhasexcused,ourformercorrespondence.

Sheindeedsuspecteditbefore:andsosheverywellmight;knowingmyloveofyou.

Shehassomuchrealconcernforyourmisfortunes,that,thinkingitwillbeaconsolationtoyou,andthatitwillobligeme,sheconsentsthatyoushallwritetometheparticularsatlargeofyoursaystory.ButitisonconditionthatIshowherallthathaspassed

betweenus,relatingtoyourselfandthevilestofmen.Ihavethemorecheerfullycomplied,asthecommunicationcannotbetoyourdisadvantage.

Youmaythereforewritefreely,anddirecttoourownhouse.

Mymotherpromisestoshowmethecopyofherlettertoyou,andyourreplytoit;whichlattershehasbutjusttoldmeof.Shealreadyapologizesfortheseverityofher's:andthinksthesightofyourreplywillaffectmetoomuch.But,havingherpromise,Iwillnot



dispensewithit.

Idoubther'sissevereenough.SoIfearyouwillthinkmine:butyouhavetaughtmenevertosparethefaultforthefriend'ssake;andthatagreaterroroughtrathertobethemoreinexcusableinthepersonwevalue,thaninoneweareindifferentto;becauseitisareflectionuponourchoiceofthatperson,andtendstoabreachoftheloveofmind,andtoexposeustotheworldforourpartiality.Totheloveofmind,Irepeat;sinceitisimpossiblebuttheerrorsofthedearestfriendmustweakenourinwardopinionofthatfriend;andtherebylayafoundationforfuturedistance,andperhapsdisgust.

GodgrantthatyoumaybeabletoclearyourconductafteryouhadescapedfromHampstead;asallbeforethattimewasnoble,generous,andprudent;themanadevilandyouasaint!----YetIhopeyoucan;andthereforeexpectitfromyou.

Isendbyaparticularhand.Hewillcallforyouransweratyourownappointment.

Iamafraidthishorridwretchwilltraceoutbythepost-officeswhereyouare,ifnotcareful.

Tohavemoney,andwill,andhead,tobeavillain,istoomuchfortherestoftheworld,whentheymeetinoneman.

LETTERLXVI

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMISSHOWETHURSDAY,JULY6.

Fewyoungpersonshavebeenabletogivemoreconvincingproofsthanmyselfhowlittletruehappinessliesintheenjoymentofourownwishes.

Toproduceoneinstanceonlyofthetruthofthisobservation;whatwouldIhavegivenforweekspast,forthefavourofaletterfrommydearMissHowe,inwhosefriendshipIplacedallmyremainingcomfort!LittledidIthink,thatthenextlettershewouldhonourmewith,shouldbeinsuchastyle,asshouldmakemelookmorethanonceatthesubscription,thatImightbesure(thenamenotbeingwrittenatlength)thatitwasnotsignedbyanotherA.H.Forsurely,thoughtI,thisismysisterArabella'sstyle:surelyMissHowe(blamemeasshepleasesinotherpoints)couldneverrepeatsosharplyuponherfriend,wordswritteninthebitternessofspirit,andinthedisorderofhead;norremindher,withasperity,andwithmingledstrokesofwit,ofanargumentheldinthegaietyofaheartelatedwithprosperousfortunes,(asminethen

was,)andverylittleapprehensiveofthesevereturnthatargumentwouldonedaytakeagainstherself.

ButwhathaveI,sinkinmyfortunes;mycharacterforfeited;myhonourlost,[whileIknowit,Icarenotwhoknowsit;]destituteoffriends,andevenofhope;whathaveItodotoshowaspiritofrepiningandexpostulationtoadearfriend,becausesheisnotmorekindthanasister?----

Youhavetillnow,mydear,treatedmewithgreatindulgence.Ifitwas



withgreaterthanIhaddeserved,Imaybetoblametohavebuiltuponit,ontheconsciousnessthatIdeserveitnowasmuchasever.ButIfind,bytherisingbitternesswhichwillminglewiththegallinmyink,thatIamnotyetsubduedenoughtomycondition.--Ilaydownmypenforonemoment.

***

Pardonme,myMissHowe.Ihaverecollectedmyself:andwillendeavourtogiveaparticularanswertoyourletter;althoughitwilltakemeuptoomuchtimetothinkofsendingitbyyourmessengerto-morrow:hecanputoffhisjourney,hesays,tillSaturday.IwillendeavourtohavethewholenarrativereadyforyoubySaturday.

Buthowtodefendmyselfineverythingthathashappened,Icannottell:sinceinsomepartofthetime,inwhichmyconductappearstohavebeencensurable,Iwasnotmyself;andtothishourknownotallthemethodstakentodeceiveandruinme.

Youtellme,thatinyourfirstletteryougavemesuchanaccountofthevilehouseIwasin,andsuchcautionsaboutthatTomlinson,asmadeyouwonderhowIcouldthinkofgoingback.

Alas,mydear!Iwastricked,mostvilelytrickedback,asyoushallhearinitsplace.

Withoutknowingthehousewassoveryvileahousefromyourintendedinformation,Idislikedthepeopletoomuch,evervoluntarilytohavereturnedtoit.ButhadyoureallywrittensuchcautionsaboutTomlinson,andthehouse,asyouseemtohavepurposedtodo,theymust,hadtheycomeintime,havebeenofinfiniteservicetome.Butnotonewordofeither,whateverwasyourintention,didyoumentiontome,inthatfirstofthethreelettersyousowarmlyTELLmeyoudidsendme.Iwillencloseittoconvinceyou.*

*ThelettersheencloseswasMr.Lovelace'sforgedone.SeeVol.V.LetterXXX.

Butyouraccountofyourmessenger'sdeliveringtomeyoursecondletter,andthedescriptionhegivesofme,aslyinguponacouch,inastrangeway,bloated,andflush-coloured;youdon'tknowhow,absolutelypuzzlesandconfoundsme.

LordhavemercyuponthepoorClarissaHarlowe!Whatcanthismean!--Whowasthemessengeryousent?WasheoneofLovelace'screaturestoo!--Couldnobodycomenearmebutthatman'sconfederates,eithersettingout

so,ormadeso?Iknownotwhattomakeofanyonesyllableofthis!IndeedIdon't.

Letmesee.Yousay,thiswasbeforeIwentfromHampstead!Myintellectshadnotthenbeentouched!--norhadIeverbeensurprisedbywine,[strangeifIhad!]:HowthencouldIbefoundinsuchastrangeway,bloatedandflush-coloured;youdon'tknowhow!--Yetwhatavile,whatahatefulfigurehasyourmessengerrepresentedmetohavemade!

ButindeedIknownothingofanymessengerfromyou.



BelievingmyselfsecureatHampstead,IstaidlongertherethanIwouldhavedone,inhopesoftheletterpromisedmeinyourshortoneofthe9th,broughtmebymyownmessenger,inwhichyouundertaketosendforandengageMrs.Townsendinmyfavour.*

*SeeVol.V.LetterXXIX.

IwonderedIhadnotheardfromyou:andwastoldyouweresick;and,atanothertime,thatyourmotherandyouhadhadwordsonmyaccount,andthatyouhadrefusedtoadmitMr.Hickman'svisitsuponit:sothatIsupposed,atonetime,thatyouwerenotabletowrite;atanother,thatyourmother'sprohibitionhaditsdueforcewithyou.ButnowIhavenodoubtthatthewickedmanmusthaveinterceptedyourletter;andIwishhefoundnotmeanstocorruptyourmessengertotellyousostrangeastory.

ItwasonSunday,June11,yousay,thatthemangaveitme.IwasatchurchtwicethatdaywithMrs.Moore.Mr.Lovelacewasatherhousethewhile,whereheboarded,andwantedtohavelodged;butIwouldnotpermitthat,thoughIcouldnothelptheother.Inoneofthesespacesitmustbethathehadtimetoworkupontheman.You'lleasily,my

dear,findthatout,byinquiringthetimeofhisarrivalatMrs.Moore'sandothercircumstancesofthestrangewayhepretendedtoseemein,onacouch,andtherest.

Hadanybodyseenmeafterwards,whenIwasbetrayedbacktothevilehouse,strugglingundertheoperationofwickedpotions,androbbedindeedofmyintellects(forthis,asyoushallhear,wasmydreadfulcase,)Imightthen,perhaps,haveappearedbloatedandflush-coloured,andIknownothowmyself.ButwereyoutoseeyourpoorClarissa,now(oreventohaveseenheratHampsteadbeforeshesufferedthevilestofalloutrages,)youwouldnotthinkherbloatedorflush-coloured:indeedyouwouldnot.

Inaword,itcouldnotbemeyourmessengersaw;nor(ifanybody)whoitwascanIdivine.

Iwillnow,asbrieflyasthesubjectwillpermit,enterintothedarkerpartofmysadstory:andyetImustbesomewhatcircumstantial,thatyoumaynotthinkmecapableofreserveorpalliation.ThelatterIamnotconsciousthatIneed.IshouldbeutterlyinexcusablewereIguiltyoftheformertoyou.Andyet,ifyouknowhowmyheartsinksunderthethoughtsofarecollectionsopainful,youwouldpityme.

AsIshallnotbeable,perhaps,toconcludewhatIhavetowriteineventwoorthreeletters,Iwillbeginanewonewithmystory;andsendthewholeofittogether,althoughwrittenatdifferentperiods,asIam

able.

Allowmealittlepause,mydear,atthisplace;andtosubscribemyself

Youreveraffectionateandobliged,CLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLXVII



MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMISSHOWE[REFERREDTOINLETTERXII.]THURSDAYNIGHT.

HehadfoundmeoutatHampstead:strangelyfoundmeout;forIamstillatalosstoknowbywhatmeans.

Iwasloth,inmybilletofthe6th,*totellyouso,forfearofgivingyouapprehensionsforme;andbesides,Ihopedthentohaveashorterandhappierissuetoaccounttoyoufor,throughyourassistance,thanImetwith.

*SeeVol.V.LetterXXXI.

[ShethengivesanarrativeofallthatpassedatHampsteadbetweenherself,Mr.Lovelace,Capt.Tomlinson,andthewomenthere,tothesameeffectwiththatsoamplygivenbyMr.Lovelace.]

Mr.Lovelace,findingallhecouldsay,andallCaptainTomlinsoncouldurge,ineffectual,toprevailuponmetoforgiveanoutragesoflagrantly

premeditated;restedallhishopesonavisitwhichwastobepaidmebyLadyBettyLawranceandMissMontague.

Inmyuncertainsituation,myprospectsallsodark,IknewnottowhomImightbeobligedtohaverecourseinthelastresort:andasthoseladieshadthebestofcharacters,insomuchthatIhadreasontoregretthatIhadnotfromthefirstthrownmyselfupontheirprotection,(whenIhadforfeitedthatofmyownfriends,)IthoughtIwouldnotshunaninterviewwiththem,thoughIwastooindifferenttotheirkinsmantoseekit,asIdoubtednotthatoneendoftheirvisitwouldbetoreconcilemetohim.

OnMonday,the12thofJune,thesepretendedladiescametoHampstead;

andIwaspresentedtothem,andtheytomebytheirkinsman.

Theywererichlydressed,andstuckoutwithjewels;thepretendedLadyBetty'swereparticularlyveryfine.

Theycameinacoach-and-four,hired,aswasconfessed,whiletheirownwasrepairingintown:apretencemade,Inowperceive,thatIshouldnotguessattheimposturebythewantofthereallady'sarmsuponit.LadyBettywasattendedbyherwoman,whoshecalledMorrison;amodestcountry-lookingperson.

Ihadheard,thatLadyBettywasafinewoman,andthatMissMontaguewasabeautifulyounglady,genteel,andgraceful,andfullofvivacity.--

Suchweretheseimpostors:andhavingneverseeneitherofthem,Ihadnottheleastsuspicion,thattheywerenottheladiestheypersonated;andbeingputalittleoutofcountenancebytherichnessoftheirdresses,Icouldnothelp,(foolthatIwas!)toapologizeformyown.

ThepretendedLadyBettythentoldme,thathernephewhadacquaintedthemwiththesituationofaffairsbetweenus.Andalthoughshecouldnotbutsay,thatshewasverygladthatshehadnotputsuchaslightuponhisLordshipandthem,asreporthadgiventhemcausetoapprehend,(thereasonsforwhichreport,however,shemusthaveapprovedof;)yet



ithadbeenmatterofgreatconcerntoher,andtohernieceMontague,andwouldtothewholefamily,tofindsogreatamisunderstandingsubsistingbetweenus,as,ifnotmadeup,mightdistancealltheirhopes.

Shecouldeasilytellwhowasinfault,shesaid.Andgavehimalookbothofangeranddisdain;askinghim,Howitwaspossibleforhimtogiveanoffenceofsuchanaturetosocharmingalady,[soshecalledme,]asshouldoccasionaresentmentsostrong?

Hepretendedtobeawedintoshameandsilence.

Mydearestniece,saidshe,andtookmyhand,(Imustcallyouniece,aswellfromlove,astohumouryouruncle'slaudableexpedient,)permitmetobe,notanadvocate,butamediatrixforhim;andnotforhissake,somuchasformyown,myCharlotte's,andallourfamily's.Theindignityhehasofferedtoyou,maybeoftootenderanaturetobeinquiredinto.Butashedeclares,thatitwasnotapremeditatedoffence;whether,mydear,[forIwasgoingtoriseuponitinmytemper,]itwereornot;andashedeclareshissorrowsforit,(andneverdidcreatureexpressadeepersorrowforanyoffencethanhe);andasitisarepairableone;letus,forthisonetime,forgivehim;andtherebylayanobligationuponthismanoferrors--LetUS,Isay,mydear:for,Sir,[turningtohim,]anoffenceagainstsuchapeerlessladyasthis,mustbeanoffence

againstme,againstyourcousinhere,andagainstallthevirtuousofoursex.

See,mydear,whatacreaturehehadpickedout!Couldyouhavethoughttherewasawomanintheworldwhocouldthusexpressherself,andyetbevile?Butshehadherprincipalinstructionsfromhim,andthosewrittendowntoo,asIhavereasontothink:forIhaverecollectedsince,thatIoncesawthisLadyBetty,(whooftenrosefromherseat,andtookaturntotheotherendoftheroomwithsuchanemotion,asifthejoyofherheartwouldnotlethersitstill)takeoutapaperfromherstays,andlookintoit,andputitthereagain.Shemightoftener,andInotobserveit;forIlittlethoughtthattherecouldbesuchimpostorsintheworld.

Icouldnotforbearpayinggreatattentiontowhatshesaid.Ifoundmytearsreadytostart;Idrewoutmyhandkerchief,andwassilent.Ihadnotbeensoindulgentlytreatedagreatwhilebyapersonofcharacteranddistinction,[suchIthoughther;]anddurstnottrusttotheaccentofmyvoice.

ThepretendedMissMontaguejoinedinonthisoccasion:anddrawingherchairclosetome,tookmyotherhand,andbesoughtmetoforgivehercousin;andconsenttorankmyselfasoneoftheprincipalsofafamilythathadlong,verylong,covetedthehonourofmyalliance.

Iamashamedtorepeattoyou,mydear,nowIknowwhatwretchesthey

are,thetender,theobliging,andtherespectfulthingsIsaidtothem.

Thewretchhimselfthencameforward.Hethrewhimselfatmyfeet.HowwasIbeset!--Thewomengrasping,onemyrighthand,theothermyleft:thepretendedMissMontaguepressingtoherlipsmorethanoncethehandsheheld:thewickedmanonhisknees,imploringmyforgiveness;andsettingbeforememyhappyandmyunhappyprospects,asIshouldforgiveandnotforgivehim.Allthathethoughtwouldaffectmeinformerpleas,andthoseofCapt.Tomlinson,herepeated.Hevowed,hepromised,hebespokethepretendedladiestoanswerforhim;andtheyengagedtheir



honoursinhisbehalf.

Indeed,mydear,Iwasdistressed,perfectlydistressed.IwassorrythatIhadgivenwaytothisvisit.ForIknewnothow,intendernesstorelations,(asIthoughtthem,)soworthy,totreatsofreelyashedeserved,amannearlyalliedtothem:sothatmyargumentsandmyresolutionsweredeprivedoftheirgreatestforce.

Ipleaded,however,myapplicationtoyou.Iexpectedeveryhour,Itoldthem,ananswerfromyoutoaletterIhadwritten,whichwoulddecidemyfuturedestiny.

Theyofferedtoapplytoyouthemselvesinperson,intheirownbehalf,astheypolitelytermedit.Theybesoughtmetowritetoyoutohastenyouranswer.

Isaid,Iwassurethatyouwouldwritethemomentthattheeventofanapplicationtobemadetoathirdpersonenabledyoutowrite.Butastothesuccessoftheirrequestinbehalfoftheirkinsman,thatdependednotupontheexpectedanswer;forthat,Ibeggedtheirpardon,wasoutofthequestion.Iwishedhimwell.Iwishedhimhappy.ButIwasconvinced,thatIneithercouldmakehimso,norheme.

Then!howthewretchpromised!--Howhevowed!--Howheentreated!--Andhow

thewomenpleaded!--Andtheyengagedthemselves,andthehonouroftheirwholefamily,forhisjust,hiskind,histenderbehaviourtome.

Inshort,mydear,Iwassohardset,thatIwasobligedtocometoamorefavourablecompromisewiththemthanIhadintended.Iwouldwaitforyouranswertomyletter,Isaid:andifthatmadedoubtfulordifficultthechangeofmeasuresIhadresolvedupon,andtheschemeoflifeIhadformed,Iwouldthenconsiderofthematter;and,iftheywouldpermitme,layallbeforethem,andtaketheiradviceuponit,inconjunctionwithyour's,asiftheoneweremyownaunt,andtheotherweremyowncousin.

Theyshedtearsuponthis--ofjoytheycalledthem:--Butsince,I

believe,totheircredit,badastheyare,thattheyweretearsoftemporaryremorse;for,thepretendedMissMontagueturnedabout,and,asIremember,said,Therewasnostandingit.

ButMr.Lovelacewasnotsoeasilysatisfied.Hewasfixeduponhisvillanousmeasuresperhaps;andsomightnotbesorrytohaveapretenceagainstme.Hebithislip--hehadbeenbuttoomuchused,hesaid,tosuchindifference,suchcoldness,intheverymidstofhishappiestprospects.Ihadontwentyoccasionsshownhim,tohisinfiniteregret,thatanyfavourIwastoconferuponhimwastobetheresultof--therehestopt--andnotofmychoice.

Thishadliketohavesetallbackagain.Iwasexceedinglyoffended.

Butthepretendedladiesinterposed.Theelderseverelytookhimtotask.Heought,shetoldhim,tobesatisfiedwithwhatIhadsaid.Shedesirednoothercondition.Andwhat,Sir,saidshe,withanairofauthority,wouldyoucommiterrors,andexpecttoberewardedforthem?

Theythenengagedmeinamoreagreeableconversation--thepretendedladydeclared,thatshe,LordM.andLadySarah,woulddirectlyandpersonallyinterestthemselvestobringaboutageneralreconciliationbetweenthetwofamilies,andthiseitherinopenorprivateconcertwithmyuncleHarlowe,asshouldbethoughtfit.Animositiesononesidehadbeen



carriedagreatway,shesaid;andtoolittlecarehadbeenshownontheothertomollifyorheal.Myfathershouldseethattheycouldtreathimasabrotherandafriend;andmybrotherandsistershouldbeconvincedthattherewasnoroomeitherforthejealously[sic]orenvytheyhadconceivedfrommotivestoounworthytobeavowed.

CouldIhelp,mydear,beingpleasedwiththem?--

Permitmeheretobreakoff.Thetaskgrowstooheavy,atpresent,fortheheartof

YourCLARISSAHARLOWE.

LETTERLXVIII

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[INCONTINUATION.]

Iwasveryill,andobligedtolaydownmypen.IthoughtIshouldhavefainted.Butambetternow--sowillproceed.

Thepretendedladies,themorewetalked,thefondertheyseemedtobeofme.AndtheLadyBettyhadMrs.Moorecalledup;andaskedher,Ifshehadaccommodationsforhernieceandself,herwoman,andtwomenservants,forthreeorfourdays?

Mr.Lovelaceansweredforherthatshehad.

ShewouldnotaskherdearnieceLovelace,[Permitme,mydear,whisperedshe,thischarmingstylebeforestrangers!Iwillkeepyouruncle'ssecret,]whethersheshouldbewelcomeornottobesonearher.Butforthetimesheshouldstayintheseparts,shewouldcomeupeverynight--Whatsayyou,nieceCharlotte?

ThepretendedCharlotteanswered,sheshouldliketodoso,ofallthings.

TheLadyBettycalledheranobliginggirl.Shelikedtheplace,shesaid.HercousinLeesonwouldexcuseher.Theair,andmycompany,woulddohergood.Sheneverchosetolieinthesmokytown,ifshecouldhelpit.Inshort,mydear,saidshetome,IwillstaywithyoutillyouhearfromMissHowe;andtillIhaveyourconsenttogowithmetoGlenham-hall.NotonemomentwillIbeoutofyourcompany,whenIcanhaveit.Stedman,mysolicitor,asthedistancefromtownissosmall,mayattendmehereforinstructions.NieceCharlotte,onewordwithyou,child.

Theyretiredtothefurtherendoftheroom,andtalkedabouttheirnight-dresses.

TheMissCharlottesaid,Morrisonmightbedispatchedforthem.

True,saidtheother--butIhavesomelettersinmyprivatebox,whichImusthaveup.Andyouknow,Charlotte,thatItrustnobodywiththekeysofthat.



CouldnotMorrisonbringupthebox?

No.Shethoughtitsafestwhereitwas.ShehadheardofarobberycommittedbuttwodaysagoatthefoodofHampstead-hill;andsheshouldberuinedinshelostherbox.

Well,then,itwasbutgoingtotowntoundress,andshewouldleaveherjewelsbehindher,andreturn;andshouldbeeasieragreatdealonallaccounts.

Formypart,Iwonderedtheycameupwiththem.Butthatwastobetakenasarespectpaidtome.Andthentheyhintedatanothervisitofceremonywhichtheyhadthoughttomake,hadtheynotfoundmesoinexpressiblyengaging.

Theytalkedloudenoughformetohearthem;onpurpose,nodoubt,thoughinaffectedwhispers;andconcludedwithhighpraisesofme.

Iwasnotfoolenoughtobelieve,ortobepuffedupwiththeirencomiums;yetnotsuspectingthem,IwasnotdispleasedatsofavourableabeginningofacquaintancewithLadies(whetherIweretoberelatedtothemornot)ofwhomIhadalwaysheardhonourablemention.Andyetatthetime,Ithought,highlyastheyexaltedme,thatinsomerespects(thoughIhardlyknowinwhat)theyfellshortofwhatIexpectedthemto

be.Thegranddeluderwasatthefartherendoftheroom,anotherway;probablytogivemeanopportunitytohearthesepreconcertedpraises--lookingintoabook,whichhadtherenotbeenapreconcert,wouldnothavetakenhisattentionforonemoment.ItwasTaylor'sHolyLivingandDying.

Whenthepretendedladiesjoinedme,heapproachedmewithitinhishand--asmartbook,this,mydear!--thisolddivineaffects,Isee,amightyflowerystyleofanordinarycountryfuneral,where,theyoungwomen,inhonourofadefunctcompanion,especiallyifshewereavirgin,orpassedforsuch,makeaflower-bedofhercoffin.

Andthen,layingdownthebook,turninguponhisheel,withoneofhisusualairsofgaiety,Andareyoudetermined,Ladies,totakeupyourlodgingswithmycharmingcreature?

Indeedtheywere.

Neverweretheremorecunning,moreartfulimpostors,thanthesewomen.Practisedcreatures,tobesure:yetgenteel;andtheymusthavebeenwell-educated--once,perhaps,asmuchthedelightoftheirparents,asIwasofmine:andwhoknowsbywhatartsruined,bodyandmind--Omydear!howpregnantisthisreflection!

Buttheman!--Neverwasthereamansodeep.Neversoconsummateadeceiver;exceptthatdetestedTomlinson;whoseyearsandseriousness,joinedwithasolidityofsenseandjudgmentthatseemeduncommon,gavehim,onewouldhavethought,advantagesinvillany,theotherhadnottimefor.Hard,veryhard,thatIshouldfallintotheknowledgeoftwosuchwretches;whentwomoresuchIhopearenottobemetwithintheworld!--bothsodeterminedtocarryonthemostbarbarousandperfidiousprojectsagainstapooryoungcreature,whoneverdidorwishedharmtoeither.



Takethefollowingslightaccountofthesewomen'sandofthisman'sbehaviourtoeachotherbeforeme.

Mr.Lovelacecarriedhimselftohispretendedauntwithhighrespect,andpaidagreatdeferencetoallshesaid.Hepermittedhertohavealltheadvantageoverhiminthereparteesandretortsthatpassedbetweenthem.Icould,indeed,easilysee,thatitwaspermitted;andthatheforborethatvivacity,thatquickness,whichheneversparedshowingtohispretendedMissMontague;andwhichamanofwitseldomknowshowtospareshowing,whenanopportunityofferstodisplayhiswit.

ThepretendedMissMontaguewasstillmorerespectfulinherbehaviourtoherpretendedaunt.Whiletheauntkeptupthedignityofthecharactershehadassumed,rallyingbothofthemwiththeairofapersonwhodependsuponthesuperioritywhichyearsandfortunegiveoveryoungerpersons,whomighthaveaviewtobeobligedtoher,eitherinherlife,oratherdeath.

Theseverityofherraillery,however,wasturneduponMr.Lovelace,onoccasionofthecharacterofthepeoplewhokeptthelodgings,which,shesaid,Ihadthoughtmyselfsowellwarrantedtoleaveprivately.

Thisstartledme.ForhavingthennosuspicionofthevileTomlinson,Iconcluded(andyourletterofthe7th*favouredmyconclusion)thatif

thehousewerenotorious,eitherhe,orMr.Mennell,wouldhavegivenmeorhimsomehintsofit--nor,althoughIlikednotthepeople,didIobserveanythinginthemveryculpable,tilltheWednesdaynightbefore,thattheyofferednottocometomyassistance,althoughwithinhearingofmydistress,(asIamsuretheywere,)andhavingasmuchreasonasItobefrightedatthefire,haditbeenreal.

*Hisforgedletter.SeeVol.V.LetterXXX.

IlookedwithindignationuponMr.Lovelace,atthishint.

Heseemedabashed.Ihavenotpatience,buttorecollectthespeciouslooksofthisviledeceiver.Buthowwasitpossible,thateventhatfloridcountenanceofhisshouldenablehimtocommandablushathispleasure?forblushhedid,morethanonce:andtheblush,onthisoccasion,wasadeep-dyedcrimson,unstrainedfor,andnatural,asIthought--butheissomuchoftheactor,thatheseemsabletoenterintoanycharacter;andhismusclesandfeaturesappearentirelyunderobediencetohiswickedwill.*

*Itispropertoobserve,thattherewasamorenaturalreasonthanthisthattheLadygivesforMr.Lovelace'sblushing.Itwasablushofindignation,asheownedafterwardstohisfriendBelford,in

conversation;forthepretendedLadyBettyhadmistakenhercue,incondemningthehouse;andhehadmuchadotorecovertheblunder;beingobligedtofollowherlead,andvaryfromhisfirstdesign;whichwastohavethepeopleofthehousespokenwellof,inordertoinducehertoreturntoit,wereitbutonpretencetodirectherclothestobecarriedtoHampstead.

Thepretendedladywenton,saying,shehadtakenuponherselftoinquireafterthepeople,onhearingthatIhadleftthehouseindisgust;and



thoughsheheardnotanythingmuchamiss,yetsheheardenoughtomakeherwonderthathecouldcarryhisspouse,apersonofsomuchdelicacy,toahouse,that,ifithadnotabadfame,hadnotagoodone.

Youmustthink,mydear,thatIlikedthepretendedLadyBettythebetterforthis.IsupposeitwasdesignedthatIshould.

Hewassurprised,hesaid,thatherLadyshipshouldhearabadcharacterofthepeople.Itwaswhathehadneverbeforeheardthattheydeserved.Itwaseasy,indeed,tosee,thattheyhadnotverygreatdelicacy,thoughtheywerenotindelicate.Thenatureoftheirlivelihood,lettinglodgings,andtakingpeopletoboard,(andyethehadunderstoodthattheywereniceintheseparticulars,)ledthemtoaimatbeingfreeandobliging:anditwasdifficult,hesaid,forpersonsofcheerfuldispositions,sotobehaveastoavoidcensure:opennessofheartandcountenanceinthesex(morewasthepity)toooftensubjectedgoodpeople,whosefortunesdidnotsetthemabovetheworld,touncharitablecensure.

Hewished,however,thatherLadyshipwouldtellwhatshehadheard:althoughnowitsignifiedbutlittle,becausehewouldneveraskmetosetfootwithintheirdoorsagain:andhebeggedshewouldnotmincethematter.

Nay,nogreatmatter,shesaid.Butshehadbeeninformed,thatthereweremorewomen-lodgersinthehousethanmen:yetthattheirvisitersweremorementhanwomen.Andthishadbeenhintedtoher(perhapsbyill-wishers,shecouldnotanswerforthat)insuchaway,asifsomewhatfurtherweremeantbyitthanwasspoken.

This,hesaid,wasthetrueinnuendo-wayofcharacterizing,usedbydetractors.Everybodyandeverythinghadablackandawhiteside,ofwhichwellwishersandillwishersmaymaketheiradvantage.Hehadobservedthatthefronthousewaswelllet,andhebelievedmoretotheonesexthantotheother;forhehadseen,occasionallypassingtoorfro,severalgenteelmodestlookingwomen;andwho,itwasveryprobable,werenotsoill-beloved,buttheymighthavevisitersandrelationsof

bothsexes:buttheywerenoneofthemanythingtous,orwetothem:wewerenotonceinanyoftheircompanies:butinthegenteelestandmostretiredhouseofthetwo,whichwehadinamannertoourselves,withtheuseofaparlourtothestreet,toserveusforaservants'hall,ortoreceivecommonvisiters,orourtradersonly,whomweadmittednotupstairs.

Healwayslovedtospeakashefound.Nomanintheworldhadsufferedmorefromcalumnythanhehimselfhaddone.

Women,heowned,oughttobemorescrupulousthanmenneededtobewheretheylodged.Neverthelesshewishedthatfact,ratherthansurmise,weretobethefoundationoftheirjudgments,especiallywhentheyspokeof

oneanother.

HemeantnoreflectionuponherLadyship'sinformants,orrathersurmisants,(ashemightcallthem,)betheywhotheywould:nordidhethinkhimselfobligedtodefendcharactersimpeached,ornotthoughtwellof,bywomenofvirtueandhonour.Neitherwerethesepeopleofimportanceenoughtohavesomuchsaidaboutthem.

ThepretendedLadyBettysaid,allwhoknewher,wouldclearherofcensoriousness:thatitgavehersomeopinion,shemustneedssay,ofthe



people,thathehadcontinuedtheresolongwithme;thatIhadrathernegativethanpositivereasonsofdisliketothem;andthatsoshrewdamanassheheardCaptainTomlinsonwashadnotobjectedtothem.

Ithink,nieceCharlotte,proceededshe,asmynephewhadnotpartedwiththeselodgings,youandI,(for,asmydearMissHarlowedislikesthepeople,Iwouldnotaskherforhercompany)willtakeadishofteawithmynephewthere,beforewegooutoftown;andthenweshallseewhatsortofpeopletheyare.IhaveheardthatMrs.Sinclairisamightyforbiddingcreature.

Withallmyheart,Madam.InyourLadyship'scompanyIshallmakenoscrupleofgoinganywhere.

ItwasLadyshipateveryword;andassheseemedproudofhertitle,andofherdresstoo,Imighthaveguessedthatshewasnotusedtoeither.

Whatsayyou,cousinLovelace?LadySarah,thoughamelancholywoman,isveryinquisitiveaboutallyouraffairs.ImustacquaintherwitheveryparticularcircumstancewhenIgodown.

Withallhisheart.Hewouldattendherwhenevershepleased.Shewouldseeveryhandsomeapartments,andverycivilpeople.

Thedeuceisinthem,saidtheMissMontague,iftheyappearothertous.Shethenfellintofamilytalk;familyhappinessonmyhoped-foraccessionintoit.TheymentionedLordM.'sandLadySarah'sgreatdesiretoseeme:howmanyfriendsandadmirers,withuplifthands,Ishouldhave![Oh!mydear,whatatriumphmustthesecreatures,andhe,haveoverthepoordevotedallthetime!]--Whatahappymanhewouldbe!--Theywouldnot,theLadyBettysaid,givethemselvesthemortificationbuttosupposethatIshouldnotbeoneofthem!

Presentswerehintedat.SheresolvedthatIshouldgowithhertoGlenham-hall.Shewouldnotberefused,althoughsheweretostayaweekbeyondhertimeforme.

Shelongedfortheexpectedletterfromyou.Imustwritetohastenit,andtoletMissHoweknowhoweverythingstoodsinceIwrotelast.Thatmightdisposemeabsolutelyinherfavourandinhernephew's;andthenshehopedtherewouldbenooccasionformetothinkofenteringuponanynewmeasures.

Indeed,mydear,Ididatthetimeintend,ifIheardnotfromyoubymorning,todispatchamanandhorsetoyou,withtheparticularsofall,thatyoumight(ifyouthoughtproper)atleastputoffMrs.Townsend'scominguptoanotherday.--ButIwasmiserablyprevented.

ShemademepromisethatIwouldwritetoyouuponthissubject,whether

Iheardfromyouornot.Oneofherservantsshouldridepostwithmyletter,andwaitforMissHowe'sanswer.

Shethenlaunchedoutindeservedpraisesofyou,mydear.Howfondsheshouldbeofthehonourofyouracquaintance.

ThepretendedMissMontaguejoinedinwithher,aswellforherselfasforhersister.

Abominablywellinstructedweretheyboth!



Omydear!whatrisksmaypoorgiddygirlsrun,whentheythrowthemselvesoutoftheprotectionoftheirnaturalfriends,andintothewideworld!

Thethentalkedagainofreconciliationandintimacywitheveryoneofmyfriends;withmymotherparticularly;andgavethedeargoodladythepraisesthateveryonegivesher,whohasthehappinesstoknowher.

Ah,mydearMissHowe!Ihadalmostforgotmyresentmentsagainstthepretendednephew!--Somanyagreeablethingssaid,mademethink,that,ifyoushouldadviseit,andifIcouldbringmymindtoforgivethewretchforanoutragesopremeditatedlyvile,andcouldforbeardespisinghimforthatandhisotherungratefulandwickedways,Imightnotbeunhappyinanalliancewithsuchafamily.Yet,thoughtIatthetime,withwhatintermixturedoeseverythingcometomethathadtheappearanceofgood!----However,asmylucidhopesmademeseefewerfaultsinthebehaviourofthesepretendedladies,thanrecollectionandabhorrencehavehelpedmesincetosee,Ibegantoreproachmyself,thatIhadnotatfirstthrownmyselfintotheirprotection.

Butamidstallthesedelightfulprospects,Imustnot,saidtheLadyBetty,forgetthatIamtogototown.

Shethenorderedhercoachtobegottothedoor.--Wewillallgototowntogether,saidshe,andreturntogether.Morrisonshallstayhere,andseeeverythingasIamusedtohaveit,inrelationtomyapartment,andmybed;forIamveryparticularinsomerespects.MycousinLeeson'sservantscandoallIwanttobedonewithregardtomynight-dresses,andthelike.Anditwillbealittleairingforyou,mydear,andawantofyourappareltobesentfromyourformerlodgingstoMrs.Leeson's;andwecanbringitupwithusfromthence.

Ihadnointentiontocomply.ButasIdidnotimaginethatshewouldinsistuponmygoingtotownwiththem,Imadenoanswertothatpartofherspeech.

Imustherelaydownmytiredpen!

Recollection!heart-affectingrecollection!howitpainsme!

LETTERLXIX

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMISSHOWE

Inthemidstofthisagreeableness,thecoachcametothedoor.ThepretendedLadyBettybesoughtmetogivethemmycompanytotheircousin

Leeson's.Idesiredtobeexcused:yetsuspectednothing.Shewouldnotbedenied.HowhappywouldavisitsocondescendingmakehercousinLeeson!----HercousinLeesonwasnotunworthyofmyacquaintance:andwouldtakeitforthegreatestfavourintheworld.

Iobjectedmydress.Buttheobjectionwasnotadmitted.ShebespokeasupperofMrs.Mooretobereadyatnine.

Mr.Lovelace,vilehypocrite,andwickeddeceiver!seeing,ashesaid,mydisliketogo,desiredhisLadyshipnottoinsistuponit.



Fondnessformycompanywaspleaded.Shebeggedmetoobligeher:madeamotiontohelpmetomyfanherself:and,inshort,wassoveryurgent,thatmyfeetcompliedagainstmyspeechandmymind:andbeing,inamanner,ledtothecoachbyher,andmadetostepinfirst,shefollowedme:andherpretendedniece,andthewretch,followedher:andawayitdrove.

Nothingbuttheheightofaffectionatecomplaisancepassedalltheway:overandover,whatajoywouldthisunexpectedvisitgivehercousinLeeson!Whatapleasuremustitbetosuchamindasmine,tobeabletogivesomuchjoytoeverybodyIcamenear!

Thecruel,thesavageseducer(asIhavesincerecollected)wasinarapturealltheway;butyetsuchasortofrapture,ashetookvisiblepainstocheck.

Hatefulvillain!howIabhorhim!--Whatmischiefmustbetheninhisplottingheart!--WhatadevotedvictimmustIbeinalltheireyes!

Thoughnotpleased,Iwasneverthelessjustthenthoughtlessofdanger;theyendeavouringthustoliftmeupaboveallapprehensionsofthat,andabovemyselftoo.

Butthink,mydear,whatadreadfulturnallhaduponme,when,throughseveralstreetsandwaysIknewnothingof,thecoachslackeningitspace,camewithinsightofthedreadfulhouseofthedreadfullestwomanintheworld;assheprovedtome.

Lordbegooduntome!criedthepoorfool,lookingoutofthecoach--Mr.Lovelace!--Madam!turningtothepretendedLadyBetty!--Madam!turningtotheniece,myhandsandeyesliftedup--Lordbegooduntome!

What!What!What!mydear.

Hepulledthestring--Whatneedtohavecomethisway?saidhe--Butsinceweare,Iwillbutaskaquestion--Mydearestlife,whythis

apprehension?

Thecoachmanstopped:hisservant,who,withoneofher'swasbehind,alighted--Ask,saidhe,ifIhaveanyletters?Whoknows,mydearestcreature,turningtome,butwemayalreadyhaveonefromtheCaptain?--Wewillnotgooutofthecoach!--Fearnothing--Whysoapprehensive?--Oh!thesefinespirits!--criedtheexecrableinsulter.

Dreadfullydidmyheartthenmisgiveme:Iwasreadytofaint.Whythisterror,mylife?youshallnotstiroutofthecoachbutonequestion,nowthefellowhasdroveusthisway.

Yourladywillfaint,criedtheexecrableLadyBetty,turningtohim--My

dearestNiece!(nieceIwillcallyou,takingmyhand)--wemustalight,ifyouaresoill.--Letusalight--onlyforaglassofwaterandhartshorn--indeedwemustalight.

No,no,no--Iamwell--quitewell--Won'tthemandriveon?--Iamwell--quitewell--indeedIam.--Man,driveon,puttingmyheadoutofthecoach--Man,driveon!--thoughmyvoicewastoolowtobeheard.

Thecoachstoptatthedoor.HowItrembled!



Dorcascametothedoor,onitsstopping.

Mydearestcreature,saidthevileman,gasping,asitwereforbreath,youshallnotalight--Anylettersforme,Dorcas?

Therearetwo,Sir.Andhereisagentleman,Mr.Belton,Sir,waitsforyourhonour;andhasdonesoaboveanhour.

I'lljustspeaktohim.Openthedoor--Yousha'n'tstepout,mydear--AletterperhapsfromCaptainalready!--Yousha'n'tstepout,mydear.

Isighedasifmyheartwouldburst.

Butwemuststepout,Nephew:yourladywillfaint.Maid,aglassofhartshornandwater!--Mydearyoumuststepout--Youwillfaint,child--Wemustcutyourlaces.--[Ibelievemycomplexionwasallmannerofcoloursbyturns]--Indeed,youmuststepout,mydear.

Heknew,saidI,Ishouldbewell,themomentthecoachdrovefromthedoor.Ishouldnotalight.Byhissoul,Ishouldnot.

Lord,Lord,Nephew,Lord,Lord,Cousin,bothwomeninabreath,whatadoyoumakeaboutnothing!Youpersuadeyourladytobeafraidofalighting.--Seeyounotthatsheisjustfainting?

Indeed,Madam,saidthevileseducer,mydearestlovemustnotbemovedinthispointagainstherwill.Ibegitmaynotbeinsistedupon.

Fiddle-faddle,foolishman--Whatapotherishere!Iguesshowitis:youareashamedtoletusseewhatsortofpeopleyoucarriedyourladyamong--butdoyougoout,andspeaktoyourfriend,andtakeyourletters.

Hesteptout;butshutthecoach-doorafterhim,toobligeme.

Thecoachmaygoon,Madam,saidI.

Thecoachshallgoon,mydearlife,saidhe.--Buthegavenot,norintendedtogive,ordersthatitshould.

Letthecoachgoon!saidI--Mr.Lovelacemaycomeafterus.

Indeed,mydear,youareill!--Indeedyoumustalight--alightbutforonequarterofanhour.--Alightbuttogiveordersyourselfaboutyourthings.Whomcanyoubeafraidofinmycompany,andmyniece's;thesepeoplemusthavebehavedshockinglytoyou!PleasetheLord,I'llinquireintoit!--I'llseewhatsortofpeopletheyare!

Immediatelycametheoldcreaturetothedoor.Athousandpardons,dearMadam,steppingtothecoach-side,ifwehaveanywayoffendedyou--Be

pleased,Ladies,[totheothertwo]toalight.

Well,mydear,whisperedtheLadyBetty,Inowfindthatanhideousdescriptionofapersonweneversawisanadvantagetothem.Ithoughtthewomanwasamonster--but,really,sheseemstolerable.

IwasafraidIshouldhavefallenintofits:butstillrefusedtogoout--Man!--Man!--Man!--criedI,gaspingly,myheadoutofthecoachandin,byturns,halfadozentimesrunning,driveon!--Letusgo!



Myheartmisgavemebeyondthepowerofmyownaccountingforit;forstillIdidnotsuspectthesewomen.ButtheantipathyIhadtakentothevilehouse,andtofindmyselfsonearit,whenIexpectednosuchmatter,withthesightoftheoldcreature,alltogethermademebehavelikeadistractedperson.

Thehartshornandwaterwasbrought.ThepretendedLadyBettymademedrinkit.Heavenknowsiftherewasanythingelseinit!

Besides,saidshe,whisperingly,Imustseewhatsortofcreaturestheniecesare.Wantofdelicacycannotbehidfromme.Youcouldnotsurely,mydear,havethisaversiontore-enterahouse,forafewminutes,inourcompany,inwhichyoulodgedandboardedseveralweeks,unlessthesewomencouldbesopresumptuouslyvile,asmynephewoughtnottoknow.

Outsteptthepretendedlady;theservant,athercommand,havingopenedthedoor.

DearestMadam,saidtheothertome,letmefollowyou,[forIwasnextthedoor.]Fearnothing:Iwillnotstirfromyourpresence.

Come,mydear,saidthepretendedlady,givemeyourhand;holdingouther's.Obligemethisonce.

Iwillblessyourfootsteps,saidtheoldcreature,ifoncemoreyouhonourmyhousewithyourpresence.

Acrowdbythistimewasgatheredaboutus;butIwastoomuchaffectedtomindthat.

AgainthepretendedMissMontagueurgedme;standingupasreadytogooutifIwouldgiveherroom.--Lord,mydear,saidshe,whocanbearthiscrowd?--Whatwillpeoplethink?

ThepretendedLadyagainpressedme,withbothherhandsheldout--Only,mydear,togiveordersaboutyourthings.

Andthuspressed,andgazedat,(forthenIlookedaboutme,)thewomensorichlydressed,peoplewhispering;inanevilmoment,outsteppedI,trembling,forcedtoleanwithbothmyhands(frightedtoomuchforceremony)onthepretendedLadyBetty'sarm--Oh!thatIhaddroppeddowndeadupontheguiltythreshold!

Weshallstaybutafewminutes,mydear!--butafewminutes!saidthesamespeciousjilt--outofbreathwithherjoy,asIhavesincethought,thattheyhadthustriumphedovertheunhappyvictim!

Come,Mrs.Sinclair,Ithinkyournameis,showustheway----followingher,andleadingme.Iamverythirsty.Youhavefrightedme,mydear,

withyourstrangefears.Imusthaveteamade,ifitcanbedoneinamoment.Wehavefarthertogo,Mrs.Sinclair,andmustreturntoHampsteadthisnight.

Itshallbereadyinamoment,criedthewretch.Wehavewaterboiling.

Hasten,then--Come,mydear,tome,assheledmethroughthepassagetothefatalinnerhouse--leanuponme--howyoutremble!--howyoufalterinyoursteps!--DearestnieceLovelace,[theoldwretchbeinginhearing,]whythesehurriesuponyourspirits?--We'llbegoneinaminute.



Andthussheledthepoorsacrificeintotheoldwretch'stoo-well-knownparlour.

Neverwasanybodysogentle,someek,solowvoiced,astheodiouswoman;drawlingout,inapulingaccent,alltheobligingthingsshecouldsay:awed,Ithenthought,bytheconsciousdignityofawomanofquality;glitteringwithjewels.

Thecalled-forteawasreadypresently.

TherewasnoMr.Belton,Ibelieve:forthewretchwentnottoanybody,unlessitwerewhilewewereparlyinginthecoach.Nosuchpersonhowever,appearedatthetea-table.

Iwasmadetodrinktwodishes,withmilk,complaisantlyurgedbythepretendedladieshelpingmeeachtoone.Iwasstupidtotheirhands;and,whenItookthetea,almostchokedwithvapours;andcouldhardlyswallow.

Ithought,transientlythought,thatthetea,thelastdishparticularly,hadanoddtaste.They,onmypalatingit,observed,thatthemilkwasLondon-milk;farshortingoodnessofwhattheywereaccustomedtofromtheirowndairies.

Ihavenodoubtthatmytwodishes,andperhapsmyhartshorn,werepreparedforme;inwhichcaseitwasmoreproperfortheirpurpose,thattheyshouldhelpme,thanthatIshouldhelpmyself.Illbefore,Ifoundmyselfstillmoreandmoredisorderedinmyhead;aheavytorpidpainincreasingfastuponme.ButIimputedittomyterror.

Nevertheless,atthepretendedLady'smotion,Iwentupstairs,attendedbyDorcas;whoaffectedtoweepforjoy,thatsheoncemoresawmyblessedface;thatwasthevilecreature'sword:andimmediatelyIsetabouttakingoutsomeofmyclothes,orderingwhatshouldbeputup,andwhatsentafterme.

WhileIwasthusemployed,upcamethepretendedLadyBetty,inahurryingway----Mydear,youwon'tbelongbeforeyouareready.Mynephewisverybusyinwritinganswerstohisletters:so,I'lljustwhipaway,andchangemydress,andcalluponyouinaninstant.

OMadam!--Iamready!Iamnowready!--Youmustnotleavemehere.AnddownIsunk,affrighted,intoachair.

Thisinstant,thisinstant,Iwillreturn--beforeyoucanbeready--beforeyoucanhavepackedupyourthings--wewouldnotbelate--therobberswehaveheardofmaybeout--don'tletusbelate.

AndawayshehurriedbeforeIcouldsayanotherword.Herpretended

niecewentwithher,withouttakingnoticetomeofhergoing.

Ihadnosuspicionyetthatthesewomenwerenotindeedtheladiestheypersonated;andIblamedmyselfformyweakfears.--Itcannotbe,thoughtI,thatsuchladieswillabettreacheryagainstapoorcreaturetheyaresofondof.Theymustundoubtedlybethepersonstheyappeartobe--whatfollytodoubtit!Theair,thedress,thedignityofwomenofquality.Howunworthyofthem,andofmycharity,concludedI,isthisungenerousshadowofsuspicion!



So,recoveringmystupefiedspirits,aswellastheycouldberecovered,(forIwasheavierandheavier!andwonderedtoDorcaswhatailedme,rubbingmyeyes,andtakingsomeofhersnuff,pinchafterpinch,toverylittlepurpose,)Ipursuedmyemployment:butwhenthatwasover,allpackedupthatIdesignedtobepackedup;andIhadnothingtodobuttothink;andfoundthemtarrysolong;IthoughtIshouldhavegonedistracted.Ishutmyselfintothechamberthathadbeenmine;Ikneeled,Iprayed;yetknewnotwhatIprayedfor:thenranoutagain:itwasalmostdarknight,Isaid:where,where,wherewasMr.Lovelace?

Hecametome,takingnonoticeatfirstofmyconsternationandwildness,[whattheyhadgivenmemademeincoherentandwild:]Allgoeswell,saidhe,mydear!--AlinefromCapt.Tomlinson!

Allindeeddidgowellforthevillanousprojectofthemostcruelandmostvillanousofmen!

Idemandedhisaunt!--Idemandedhiscousin!--Theevening,Isaid,wasclosing!--Myheadwasvery,verybad,IrememberIsaid--anditgrewworseandworse.--

Terror,however,asyetkeptupmyspirits;andIinsisteduponhisgoinghimselftohastenthem.

Hecalledhisservant.Heravedatthesexfortheirdelay:'twaswellthatbusinessofconsequenceseldomdependeduponsuchparading,unpunctualtriflers!

Hisservantcame.

HeorderedhimtoflytohiscousinLeeson's,andtoletLadyBettyandhiscousinknowhowuneasywebothwereattheirdelay:adding,ofhisownaccord,desirethem,iftheydon'tcomeinstantly,tosendtheircoach,andwewillgowithoutthem.TellthemIwonderthey'llservemeso!

Ithoughtthiswasconsideratelyandfairlyput.Butnow,indifferentas

myheadwas,Ihadalittletimetoconsiderthemanandhisbehaviour.Heterrifiedmewithhislooks,andwithhisviolentemotions,ashegazeduponme.Evidentjoy-suppressedemotions,asIhavesincerecollected.Hissentencesshort,andpronouncedasifhisbreathweretouched.NeversawIhisabominableeyeslookasthentheylooked--Triumphinthem!--fierceandwild;andmoredisagreeablethanthewomen'satthevilehouseappearedtomewhenIfirstsawthem:andattimes,suchaleering,mischief-bodingcast!--Iwouldhavegiventheworldtohavebeenanhundredmilesfromhim.Yethisbehaviourwasdecent--adecency,however,thatImighthaveseentobestruggledfor--forhesnatchedmyhandtwoorthreetimes,withavehemenceinhisgraspthathurtme;speakingwordsoftendernessthroughhisshutteeth,asitseemed;andletitgowithabeggar-voicedhumbledaccent,likethevile

woman'sjustbefore;half-inward;yethiswordsandmannercarryingtheappearanceofstrongandalmostconvulsedpassion!--Omydear!whatmischiefwashenotthenmeditating!

Icomplainedonceortwiceofthirst.Mymouthseemedparched.Atthetime,Isupposedthatitwasmyterror(gaspingoftenasIdidforbreath)thatparcheduptheroofofmymouth.Icalledforwater:sometable-beerwasbroughtme:beer,Isuppose,wasabettervehiclefortheirpotions.Itoldthemaid,thatsheknewIseldomtastedmaltliquor:yet,suspectingnothingofthisnature,beingextremelythirsty,



Idrankit,aswhatcamenext:andinstantly,asitwere,foundmyselfmuchworsethanbefore:asifinebriated,Ishouldfancy:Iknownothow.

Hisservantwasgonetwiceaslongasheneeded:and,justbeforehisreturn,cameoneofthepretendedLadyBetty'swithaletterforMr.Lovelace.

Hesentituptome.Ireadit:andthenitwasthatIthoughtmyselfalostcreature;itbeingtoputoffhergoingtoHampsteadthatnight,onaccountofviolentfitswhichMissMontaguewaspretendedtobeseizedwith;forthenimmediatelycameintomyheadhisvileattemptuponmeinthishouse;therevengethatmyflightmighttooprobablyinspirehimwithonthatoccasion,andbecauseofthedifficultyImadetoforgivehim,andtobereconciledtohim;hisverylookswildanddreadfultome;andthewomenofthehousesuchasIhadmorereasonthanever,evenfromthepretendedLadyBetty'shint,tobeafraidof:allthesecrowdingtogetherinmyapprehensivemind,Ifellintoakindofphrensy.

IhavenoremembrancehowIwasforthistimeitlasted:butIknowthat,inmyfirstagitations,Ipulledoffmyhead-dress,andtoremyrufflesintwentytatters,andrantofindhimout.

Whenalittlerecovered,Iinsisteduponthehinthehadgivenmeoftheircoach.Butthemessenger,hesaid,hadtoldhim,thatitwassent

tofetchaphysician,lesthischariotshouldbeputup,ornotready.ItheninsistedupongoingdirectlytoLadyBetty'slodgings.

Mrs.Leeson'swasnowacrowdedhouse,hesaid:andasmyearnestnesscouldbeowingtonothingbutgroundlessapprehensions,[andOh!whatvows,whatprotestationsofhishonour,didhethenmake!]hehopedIwouldnotaddtotheirpresentconcern.Charlotte,indeed,wasusedtofits,hesaid,uponanygreatsurprises,whetherofjoyorgrief;andtheywouldholdherforoneweektogether,ifnotgotoffinafewhours.

Youareanobserverofeyes,mydear,saidthevillain;perhapsinsecretinsult:SawyounotinMissMontague's,now-and-thenatHampstead,

somethingwildish?Iwasafraidforherthen.Silenceandquietonlydohergood:yourconcernforher,andherloveforyou,willbutaugmentthepoorgirl'sdisorder,ifyoushouldgo.

Allimpatientwithgriefandapprehension,Istilldeclaredmyselfresolvednottostayinthathousetillmorning.AllIhadintheworld,myrings,mywatch,mylittlemoney,foracoach;or,ifonewerenottobegot,IwouldgoonfoottoHampsteadthatnight,thoughIwalkeditbymyself.

Acoachwashereuponsentfor,orpretendedtobesentfor.Anyprice,hesaid,hewouldgivetoobligeme,lateasitwas;andhewouldattendmewithallhissoul.Butnocoachwastobegot.

Letmecutshorttherest.Igrewworseandworseinmyhead!nowstupid,nowraving,nowsenseless.Thevilestofvilewomenwasbroughttofrightenme.Neverwastheresohorribleacreatureassheapprearedtomeatthistime.

IrememberIpleadedformercy.IrememberthatIsaidIwouldbehis--indeedIwouldbehis--toobtainhismercy.ButnomercyfoundI!Mystrength,myintellectsfailedme--Andthensuchscenesfollowed--Omydear,suchdreadfulscenes!--fitsuponfits,(faintlyindeedand



imperfectlyremembered,)procuringmenocompassion--Butdeathwaswithheldfromme.Thatwouldhavebeentoogreatamercy!

***

ThuswasItrickedanddeludedbackbyblackerheartsofmyownsexthanIthoughttherewereintheworld;whoappearedtometobepersonsofhonour;and,wheninhispower,thusbarbarouslywasItreatedbythisvillanousman!

Iwassosenseless,thatIdarenotaver,thatthehorridcreaturesofthehousewerepersonallyaidingandabetting:butsomevisionaryremembrancesIhaveoffemalefigures,flitting,asImaysay,beforemysight;thewretchedwoman'sparticularly.ButastheseconfusedideasmightbeowingtotheterrorIhadconceivedoftheworsethanmasculineviolenceshehadbeenpermittedtoassumetome,forexpressingmyabhorrenceofherhouse;andaswhatIsufferedfromhisbarbaritywantsnotthataggravation;Iwillsaynomoreonasubjectsoshockingasthismusteverbetomyremembrance.

Ineversawthepersonatingwretchesafterwards.Hepersistedtothelast,(dreadfullyinvokingHeavenasawitnesstothetruthofhis

assertion)thattheywerereallyandtrulytheladiestheypretendedtobe;declaring,thattheycouldnottakeleaveofme,whentheylefttown,becauseofthestateofsenselessnessandphrensyIwasin.Fortheirintoxicating,orratherstupefying,potionshadalmostdeleteriouseffectsuponmyintellects,asIhavehinted;insomuchthat,forseveraldaystogether,Iwasunderastrangedelirium;nowmoping,nowdozing,nowweeping,nowraving,nowscribbling,tearingwhatIscribbledasfastasIwroteit:mostmiserablewhennow-and-thenarayofreasonbroughtconfusedlytomyremembrancewhatIhadsuffered.

LETTERLXX

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE[INCONTINUATION.]

[Theladynextgivesanaccount,

Ofherrecoveryfromherdeliriumandsleepydisorder:

Ofherattempttogetawayinhisabsence:

Oftheconversationsthatfollowed,athisreturn,betweenthem:

Oftheguiltyfigurehemade:

Ofherresolutionnottohavehim:

Ofherseveraleffortstoescape:

OfhertreatywithDorcastoassistherinit:

OfDorcas'sdroppingthepromissorynote,undoubtedly,asshesays,onpurposetobetrayher:



Ofhertriumphoverallthecreaturesofthehouse,assembledtoterrifyher;andperhapstocommitfreshoutragesuponher:

OfhissettingoutforM.Hall:

Ofhisrepeatedletterstoinducehertomeethimatthealtar,onheruncle'sanniversary:

Ofherdeterminedsilencetothemall:

Ofhersecondescape,effected,asshesays,contrarytoherownexpectation:theattemptbeingatfirstbuttheintendedpreludetoamorepromisingone,whichshehadformedinhermind:

Andofotherparticulars;whichbeingtobefoundinMr.Lovelace'sletterspreceding,andtheletterofhisfriendBelford,areomitted.Shethenproceeds:]

TheveryhourthatIfoundmyselfinaplaceofsafety,Itookpentowritetoyou.WhenIbegan,Idesignedonlytowritesixoreightlines,toinquireafteryourhealth:for,havingheardnothingfromyou,Ifearedindeed,thatyouhadbeen,andstillwere,tooilltowrite.But

nosoonerdidmypenbegintoblotthepaper,butmysadhearthurrieditintolength.TheapprehensionsIhadlainunder,thatIshouldnotbeabletogetaway;thefatigueIhadineffectingmyescape:thedifficultyofprocuringalodgingformyself;havingdislikedthepeopleoftwohouses,andthoseofathirddislikingme;foryoumustthinkImadeafrightedappearance--these,togetherwiththerecollectionofwhatIhadsufferedfromhim,andmyfartherapprehensionsofmyinsecurity,andmydesolatecircumstances,hadsodisorderedme,thatIrememberIrambledstrangelyinthatletter.

Inshort,Ithoughtit,onre-perusal,ahalf-distractedone:butIthendespaired,(wereItobeginagain,)ofwritingbetter:soIletitgo:andcanhavenoexcusefordirectingitasIdid,ifthecauseofthe

incoherenceinitwillnotfurnishmewithaverypitiableone.

TheletterIreceivedfromyourmotherwasadreadfulblowtome.Butneverthelessithadthegoodeffectuponme(labouring,asIdidjustthen,underaviolentfitofvapourishdespondency,andalmostyieldingtoit)whichprofusebleedingandblisteringshaveinparalyticorapoplecticalstrokes;revivingmyattention,andrestoringmetospiritstocombattheevilsIwassurroundedby--sluicingoff,anddivertingintoanewchannel,(ifImaybeallowedanothermetaphor,)theoverchargingwoeswhichthreatenedoncemoretooverwhelmmyintellects.

ButyetImostsincerelylamented,(andstilllament,)inyourmother'swords,ThatIcannotbeunhappybymyself:andwasgrieved,notonlyfor

thetroubleIhadgivenyoubefore;butforthenewoneIhadbroughtuponyoubymyinattention.

[ShethengivesthesubstanceofthelettersshewrotetoMrs.Norton,toLadyBettyLawrance,andtoMrs.Hodges;asalsooftheiranswers;wherebyshedetectedallMr.Lovelace'simpostures.Sheproceedsasfollows:]



Icannot,however,forbeartowonderhowthevileTomlinsoncouldcomeattheknowledgeofseveralofthethingshetoldmeof,andwhichcontributedtogivemeconfidenceinhim.*

*TheattentivereaderneednotbereferredbackforwhattheLadyneverthelesscouldnotaccountfor,assheknewnotthatMr.LovelacehadcomeatMissHowe'sletters;particularlythatinVol.IV.LetterXXIX.whichhecommentsuponinLetterXLIV.ofthesamevolume.

IdoubtnotthatthestoriesofMrs.Fretchvilleandherhousewouldbefoundasvileasanyoftherest,wereItoinquire;andhadInotenough,andtoomuch,alreadyagainsttheperjuredman.

HowhaveIbeenledon!--Whatwillbetheendofsuchafalseandperjuredcreature!Heavennotlessprofanedanddefiedbyhimthanmyselfdeceivedandabused!This,however,againstmyselfImustsay,ThatifwhatIhavesufferedbethenaturalconsequenceofmyfirsterror,Inevercanforgivemyself,althoughyouaresopartialinmyfavour,astosay,thatIwasnotcensurableforwhatpassedbeforemyfirstescape.

Andnow,honouredMadam,andmydearestMissHowe,whoaretositin

judgmentuponmycase,permitmetolaydownmypenwithonerequest,which,withthegreatestearnestness,Imaketoyouboth:andthatis,ThatyouwillneitherofyouopenyourlipsinrelationtothepotionsandtheviolencesIhavehintedat.--NotthatIamsolicitous,thatmydisgraceshouldbehiddenfromtheworld,orthatitshouldnotbegenerallyknown,thatthemanhasprovedavillaintome:forthis,itseems,everybodybutmyselfexpectedfromhischaracter.Butsuppose,ashisactionsbymearereallyofacapitalnature,itwereinsisteduponthatIshouldappeartoprosecutehimandhisaccomplicesinacourtofjustice,howdoyouthinkIcouldbearthat?

Butsincemycharacter,beforethecapitalenormity,waslostintheeyeoftheworld;andthatfromtheveryhourIleftmyfather'shouse;and

sinceallmyownhopesofworldlyhappinessareentirelyover;letmeslidequietlyintomygrave;andletitbenotremembered,exceptbyonefriendlytear,andnomore,droptfromyourgentleeye,mineowndearAnnaHowe,onthehappydaythatshallshutupallmysorrows,thattherewassuchacreatureas

CLARISSAHARLOWE

SATURDAY,JULY8.

LETTERLXXI

MISSHOWE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWESUNDAY,JULY9.

MayHeavensignalizeitsvengeance,inthefaceofalltheworld,uponthemostabandonedandprofligateofmen!--Andinitsowntime,Idoubtnotbutitwill.--AndwemustlooktoaWORLDBEYONDTHISfortherewardofyoursufferings!



Anothershockingdetection,mydear!--Howhaveyoubeendeluded!--VerywatchfulIhavethoughtyou;verysagacious:--but,alas!notwatchful,notsagaciousenough,forthehorridvillainyouhavehadtodealwith!----

Theletteryousentmeenclosedasmine,ofthe7thofJune,isavillanousforgery.*

*SeeVol.V.LetterXXX.

Thehand,indeed,isastonishinglylikemine;andthecover,Isee,isactuallymycover:butyettheletterisnotsoexactlyimitated,butthat,(hadyouhadanysuspicionsabouthisvilenessatthetime,)you,whosowellknowmyhand,mighthavedetectedit.

Inshort,thisvile,forgedletter,thoughalongone,containsbutafewextractsfrommine.Minewasaverylongone.Hehasomittedeverything,Isee,initthatcouldhaveshownyouwhatadetestablehousethehouseis;andgivenyoususpicionsofthevileTomlinson.--Youwillseethis,andhowhehasturnedMissLardner'sinformation,andmyadvicestoyou,[execrablevillain!]tohisownhorridends,bytheroughdraughtofthegenuineletter,whichIshallenclose.*

*SeeVol.V.LetterXX.

Apprehensiveforbothoursafetiesfromthevillanyofsuchadaringandprofligatecontriver,Imustcalluponyou,mydear,toresolveupontakinglegalvengeanceoftheinfernalwretch.Andthisnotonlyforourownsakes,butforthesakesofinnocentswhootherwisemayyetbedeludedandoutragedbyhim.

[Shethengivestheparticularsofthereportmadebytheyoungfellow

whomshesenttoHampsteadwithherletter;andwhosupposedhehaddelivereditintoherownhand;*andthenproceeds:]

*SeeVol.VI.LetterVI.

Iamastonished,thatthevilewretch,whocouldknownothingofthetimemymessenger,(whosehonestyIcanvouchfor)wouldcome,couldhaveacreaturereadytopersonateyou!Strange,thatthemanshouldhappentoarrivejustasyouweregonetochurch,(asIfindwasthefact,oncomparingwhathesayswithyourhintthatyouwereatchurchtwicethatday,)whenhemighthavegottoMrs.Moore'stwohoursbefore!--Buthad

youtoldme,mydear,thatthevillainhadfoundyouout,andwasaboutyou!--Youshouldhavedonethat--yetIblameyouuponajudgmentfoundedontheeventonly!

Ineverhadanyfaithinthestoriesthatgocurrentamongcountrygirls,ofspecters,familiars,anddemons;yetIseenotanyotherwaytoaccountforthiswretch'ssuccessfulvillany,andforhismeansofworkinguphisspeciousdelusions,butbysupposing,(ifhebenotthedevilhimself,)thathehasafamiliarconstantlyathiselbow.Sometimesitseemstomethatthisfamiliarassumestheshapeofthat



solemnvillainTomlinson:sometimesthatoftheexecrableSinclair,ashecallsher:sometimesitispermittedtotakethatofLadyBettyLawrance--but,whenitwouldassumetheangelicshapeandmienofmybelovedfriend,seewhatabloatedfigureitmade!

'Tismyopinion,mydear,thatyouwillbenolongersafewhereyouare,thanwhiletheV.isinthecountry.Wordsarepoor!--orhowcouldIexecratehim!Ihavehardlyanydoubtthathehassoldhimselfforatime.Oh!maythetimebeshort!--ormayhisinfernalprompternomorekeepcovenantwithhimthanhedoeswithothers!

Ienclosenotonlytheroughdraughtofmylonglettermentionedabove,buttheheadsofthatwhichtheyoungfellowthoughthedeliveredintoyourownhandsatHampstead.Andwhenyouhaveperusedthem,IwillleavetoyoutojudgehowmuchreasonIhadtobesurprisedthatyouwrotemenotananswertoeitherofthoseletters;oneofwhichyouownedyouhadreceived,(thoughitprovedtobehisforgedone,)theotherdeliveredintoyourownhands,asIwasassured;andbothofthemofsomuchconcerntoyourhonour;andstillnowmuchmoresurprisedImustbe,whenIreceivedaletterfromMrs.Townsend,datedJune15,fromHampstead,importing,'ThatMr.Lovelace,whohadbeenwithyouseveraldays,had,ontheMondaybefore,broughtLadyBettyandhiscousin,richlydressed,andinacoach-and-four,tovisityou:who,withyourownconsent,hadcarriedyoutotownwiththem--toyourformerlodgings;

whereyoustillwere:thattheHampsteadwomenbelievedyoutobemarried;andreflecteduponmeasafomenterofdifferencesbetweenmanandwife:thathehimselfwasatHampsteadthedaybefore;viz.Wednesdaythe14th;andboastedofhishappinesswithyou;invitingMrs.Moore,Mrs.Bevis,andMissRawlins,togototown,tovisithisspouse;whichtheypromisedtodo:thathedeclaredthatyouwereentirelyreconciledtoyourformerlodgings:--andthat,finally,thewomenatHampsteadtoldMrs.Townsend,thathehadveryhandsomelydischargedtheirs.'

Iowntoyou,mydear,thatIwassomuchsurprisedanddisgustedattheseappearancesagainstaconducttillthenunexceptionable,thatIwasresolvedtomakemyselfaseasyasIcould,andwaittillyoushouldthinkfittowritetome.ButIcouldrein-inmyimpatiencebutfora

fewdays;andonthe20thofJuneIwroteasharplettertoyou;whichIfindyoudidnotreceive.

Whatafatality,mydear,hasappearedinyourcase,fromtheverybeginningtillthishour!Hadmymotherpermitted----

ButcanIblameher;whenyouhaveafatherandmotherliving,whohavesomuchtoanswerfor?--Somuch!--asnofatherandmother,consideringthechildtheyhavedriven,persecuted,exposed,renounced,everhadtoanswerfor!

ButagainImustexecratetheabandonedvillain--yet,asIsaidbefore,allwordsarepoor,andbeneaththeoccasion.

Butseewenot,inthehorridperjuriesandtreacheryofthisman,whatrakesandlibertineswilldo,whentheygetayoungcreatureintotheirpower!Itisprobablethathemighthavetheintolerablepresumptiontohopeaneasierconquest:but,whenyourunexampledvigilanceandexaltedvirtuemadepotions,andrapes,andtheutmostviolences,necessarytotheattainmentofhisdetestableend,weseethatheneverboggledatthem.Ihavenodoubtthatthesameorequalwickednesswouldbeoftenercommittedbymenofhisvillanouscast,ifthefollyandcredulityofthepoorinconsiderateswhothrowthemselvesintotheirhands,didnotgive



themaneasiertriumph.

Withwhatcomfortmustthoseparentsreflectuponthesethingswhohavehappilydisposedoftheirdaughtersinmarriagetoavirtuousman!Andhowhappytheyoungwomenwhofindthemselvessafeinaworthyprotection!--IfsuchapersonasMissClarissaHarlowecouldnotescape,whocanbesecure?--Since,thougheveryrakeisnotaLOVELACE,neitheriseverywomanaCLARISSA:andhisattemptswerebutproportionedtoyourresistanceandvigilance.

Mymotherhascommandedmetoletyouknowherthoughtsuponthewholeofyoursadstory.Iwilldoitinanotherletter;andsendittoyouwiththis,byaspecialmessenger.

But,forthefuture,ifyouapproveofit,Iwillsendmylettersbytheusualhand,(Collins's,)tobeleftattheSaracen'sHead,onSnow-hill:whitheryoumaysendyour's,(aswebothusedtodo,toWilson's,)exceptsuchasweshallthinkfittotransmitbythepost:whichIamafraid,aftermynext,mustbedirectedtoMr.Hickman,asbefore:sincemymotherisfixingaconditiontoourcorrespondence,which,Idoubt,youwillnotcomplywith,thoughIwishyouwould.ThisconditionIshallacquaintyouwithby-and-by.

Meantime,beggingexcuseforalltheharshthingsinmylast,ofwhich

yoursweetmeeknessandsuperiorgreatnessofsoulhavenowmadememostheartilyashamed,Ibeseechyou,mydearestcreature,tobelievemetobe

Yourtrulysympathising,andunalterablefriend,ANNAHOWE.

LETTERLXXII

MISSHOWE,TOMISSCLARISSAHARLOWEMONDAY,JULY10.

Inow,mydearestfriend,resumemypen,toobeymymother,ingivingyouheropinionuponyourunhappystory.

Shestillharpsupontheoldstring,andwillhaveitthatallyourcalamitiesareowingtoyourfirstfatalstep;forshebelieves,(whatIcannot,)thatyourrelationshadintendedafteronegeneraltrialmore,tocomplywithyouraversion,iftheyhadfoundittobeasrivetedaone,as,letmesay,itwasafollytosupposeitwouldnotbefoundtobe,aftersomanyridiculously-repeatedexperiments.

Astoyourlattersufferingsfromthatvilestofmiscreants,sheis

unalterablyofopinionthatifallbeasyouhaverelated(whichshedoubtsnot)withregardtothepotions,andtotheviolencesyouhavesustained,yououghtbyallmeanstosetonfootaprosecutionagainsthim,andagainsthisdevilishaccomplices.

Sheasks,Whatmurderers,whatravishers,wouldbebroughttojustice,ifmodestyweretobeageneralplea,andallowable,againstappearinginacourttoprosecute?

Shesays,thatthegoodofsocietyrequires,thatsuchabeastofprey



shouldbehuntedoutofit:and,ifyoudonotprosecutehim,shethinksyouwillbeanswerableforallthemischiefshemaydointhecourseofhisfuturevillanouslife.

Willitbethought,Nancy,saidshe,thatMissClarissaHarlowecanbeinearnest,whenshesays,sheisnotsolicitoustohaveherdisgracesconcealedfromtheworld,ifshebeafraidorashamedtoappearincourt,todojusticetoherselfandhersexagainsthim?Willitnotberathersurmised,thatshemaybeapprehensivethatsomeweakness,orlurkinglove,willappearuponthetrialofthestrangecause?If,inferredshe,suchcomplicatedvillanyasthis(whereperjury,potions,forgery,subornation,areallcombinedtoeffecttheruinofaninnocentcreature,andtodishonourafamilyofeminence,andwheretheverycrimes,asmaybesupposed,areproofsofherinnocence)istogooffwithimpunity,whatcasewilldeservetobebroughtintojudgment?orwhatmalefactoroughttobehanged?

Thenshethinks,andsodoI,thatthevilecreatures,hisaccomplices,ought,byallmeans,tobebroughttocondignpunishment,astheymustandwillbeuponbringinghimtotrial:andthismaybeameantoblowupandrootoutawholenestofvipers,andsavemanyinnocentcreatures.

Sheadded,thatifMissClarissaHarlowecouldbesoindifferentabouthavingthispublicjusticedoneuponsuchawretchforherownsake,she

oughttoovercomeherscruplesoutofregardtoherfamily,heracquaintance,andhersex,whichareallhighlyinjuredandscandalizedbyhisvillanytoher.

Forherownpart,shedeclares,thatweresheyourmother,shewouldforgiveyouuponnootherterms:and,uponyourcompliancewiththese,sheherselfwillundertaketoreconcileallyourfamilytoyou.

These,mydear,aremymother'ssentimentsuponyoursadstory.

Icannotsaybuttherearereasonandjusticeinthem:anditismyopinion,thatitwouldbeveryrightforthelawtoobligeaninjuredwomantoprosecute,andtomakeseductionontheman'spartcapital,

wherehisstudiedbaseness,andnofaultinherwill,appeared.

TothispurposethecustomintheIsleofManisaverygoodone----

'Ifasinglewomanthereprosecutesasinglemanforarape,theecclesiasticaljudgesimpannelajury;and,ifthisjuryfindhimguilty,heisreturnedguiltytothetemporalcourts:whereifhebeconvicted,thedeemster,orjudge,deliverstothewomanarope,asword,andaring;andshehasitinherchoicetohavehimhanged,beheaded,ortomarryhim.'

Oneofthetwoformer,Ithink,shouldalwaysbeheroption.

Ilongfortheparticularsofyourstory.Youmusthavetoomuchtimeuponyourhandsforamindsoactiveasyour's,iftolerablehealthandspiritsbeaffordedyou.

Thevillanyoftheworstofmen,andthevirtueofthemostexcellentofwomen,Iexpectwillbeexemplifiedinit,wereittobewritteninthesameconnectedandparticularmannerinwhichyouusedtowritetome.

Tryforit,mydearestfriend;andsinceyoucannotgivetheexamplewithoutthewarning,giveboth,forthesakesofallthosewhoshallhear



ofyourunhappyfate;beginningfromyour'sofJune5,yourprospectsthennotdisagreeable.Ipityyouforthetask;thoughIcannotwillinglyexemptyoufromit.

***

Mymotherwillhavemeadd,thatshemustinsistuponyourprosecutingthevillain.Sherepeats,thatshemakesthataconditiononwhichshepermitsourfuturecorrespondence.Letmethereforeknowyourthoughtsuponit.Iaskedher,ifshewouldbewillingthatIshouldappeartosupportyouincourt,ifyoucomplied?--Byallmeans,shesaid,ifthatwouldinduceyoutobeginwithhim,andwiththehorridwomen.IthinkIcouldprobablyattendyou,IamsureIcould,weretherebutaprobabilityofbringingthemonstertohisdeservedend.

Oncemoreyourthoughtsofit,supposingitweretomeetwiththeapprobationofyourrelations.

Butwhateverbeyourdeterminationonthishead,itshallbemyconstantprayer,thatGodwillgiveyoupatiencetobearyourheavyafflictions,asapersonoughttodowhohasnotbroughtthemuponherselfbyafaultywill:thatHewillspeakpeaceandcomforttoyourwoundedmind;andgive

youmanyhappyyears.Iam,andeverwillbe,YouraffectionateandfaithfulANNAHOWE.

***

[Thetwoprecedinglettersweresentbyaspecialmessenger:inthecoverwerewrittenthefollowinglines:]

MONDAY,JULY10.

Icannot,mydearestfriend,suffertheenclosedtogounaccompaniedbyafewlines,tosignifytoyouthattheyarebothlesstenderinsomeplacesthanIwouldhavewritten,hadtheynotbeentopassmymother'sinspection.Theprincipalreason,however,ofmywritingthusseparatelyis,tobegofyoutopermitmetosendyoumoneyandnecessaries,whichyoumustneedswant;andthatyouwillletmeknow,ifeitherI,oranybodyIcaninfluence,canbeofservicetoyou.Iamexcessivelyapprehensivethatyouarenotenoughoutofthevillain'sreachwhereyouare.YetLondon,Iampersuaded,istheplace,ofallothers,tobeprivatein.

Icouldtearmyhairforvexation,thatIhaveitnotinmypowerto

affordyoupersonalprotection!--Iam

YoureverdevotedANNAHOWE.

Oncemoreforgiveme,mydearestcreature,formybarbaroustauntinginmineofthe5th!YetIcanhardlyforgivemyself.Itobesocruel,yettoknowyousowell!--Whence,whence,hadIthisvileimpatiencyofspirit!--



LETTERLXXIII

MISSCLARISSAHARLOWE,TOMISSHOWETUESDAY,JULY11.

Forgiveyou,mydear!--MostcordiallydoIforgiveyou--WillyouforgivemeforsomesharpthingsIwroteinreturntoyour'softhe5th?Youcouldnothavelovedmeasyoudo,norhadtheconcernyouhavealwaysshownformyhonour,ifyouhadnotbeenutterlydispleasedwithme,ontheappearancewhichmyconductworetoyouwhenyouwrotethatletter.Imostheartilythankyou,mybestandonlylove,fortheopportunityyougavemeofclearingitup;andforbeinggenerouslyreadytoacquitmeofintentionalblame,themomentyouhadreadmymelancholynarrative.

Asyouaresoearnesttohavealltheparticularsofmysadstorybeforeyou,Iwill,iflifeandspiritsbelentme,giveyouanampleaccountofallthathasbefallenme,fromthetimeyoumention.Butthis,itisveryprobable,youwillnotsee,tillafterthecloseofmylastscene:andasIshallwritewithaviewtothat,Ihopenoothervoucherwillbewantedfortheveracityofthewriter,bewhowillthereader.

Iamfarfromthinkingmyselfoutofthereachofthisman'sfurtherviolence.ButwhatcanIdo?WhithercanIfly?--Perhapsmybadstateofhealth(whichmustgrowworse,asrecollectionofthepastevils,andreflectionsuponthem,growheavierandheavieruponme)maybemyprotection.Once,indeed,Ithoughtofgoingabroad;and,hadItheprospectofmanyyearsbeforeme,Iwouldgo.--But,mydear,theblowisgiven.--Norhaveyoureasonnow,circumstancedasIam,tobeconcernedthatitis.WhataheartmustIhave,ifitbenotbroken--andindeed,mydearfriend,Idosoearnestlywishforthelastclosingscene,andwithsomuchcomfortfindmyselfinadecliningway,thatIevensometimesungratefullyregretthatnaturally-healthyconstitution,whichusedtodoubleuponmeallmyenjoyments.

Astotheearnestly-recommendedprosecution,Imaypossiblytouchuponitmorelargelyhereafter,ifeverIshallhavebetterspirits;fortheyareatpresentextremelysunkandlow.Butjustnow,Iwillonlysay,thatIwouldsoonersuffereveryevil(therepetitionofthecapitaloneexcepted)thanappearpubliclyinacourttodomyselfjustice.*AndIamheartilygrievedthatyourmotherprescribessuchameasureastheconditionofourfuturecorrespondence:forthecontinuanceofyourfriendship,mydear,andthedesireIhadtocorrespondwithyoutomylife'send,wereallmyremaininghopesandconsolation.Nevertheless,asthatfriendshipisinthepoweroftheheart,notofthehandonly,IhopeIshallnotforfeitthat.

*Dr.Lewen,inLetterXXIV.ofVol.VIII.presseshertothispublicprosecution,byargumentsworthyofhischaracter;whichsheanswersinamannerworthyofher's.SeeLetterXXV.ofthatvolume.

Omydear!whatwouldIgivetoobtainarevocationofmyfather'smalediction!areconciliationisnottobehopedfor.You,whoneverlovedmyfather,maythinkmysolicitudeonthisheadaweakness:butthemotiveforit,sunkasmyspiritsattimesare,isnotalwaysweak.



***

Iapproveofthemethodyouprescribefortheconveyanceofourletters;andhavealreadycausedtheporteroftheinntobeengagedtobringtomeyour's,themomentthatCollinsarriveswiththem.AndtheservantofthehousewhereIamwillbepermittedtocarryminetoCollinsforyou.

IhavewrittenalettertoMissRawlins,ofHampstead;theanswertowhich,justnowreceived,hashelpedmetotheknowledgeofthevilecontrivance,bywhichthewickedmangotyourletterofJunethe10th.Iwillgiveyouthecontentsofboth.

Inminetoher,Ibrieflyacquaintedher'withwhathadbefallenme,throughthevilenessofthewomenwhohadpasseduponmeastheauntandcousinofthewickedestofmen;andown,thatIneverwasmarriedtohim.Idesirehertomakeparticularinquiry,andtoletmeknow,whoitwasatMrs.Moore'sthat,onSundayafternoon,June11,whileIwasatchurch,receivedaletterfromMissHowe,pretendingtobeme,andlyingonacouch:--whichletter,haditcometomyhands,wouldhavesavedmefromruin.Iexcusemyself(onthescoreofthedelirium,whichthehorridusageIhadreceivedthrewmeinto,andfromaconfinementas

barbarousasillegal)thatIhadnotbeforeappliedtoMrs.MooreforanaccountofwhatIwasindebtedtoher:whichaccountInowdesired.And,forfearofbeingtracedbyMr.Lovelace,Idirectedhertosuperscribeheranswer,ToMrs.MaryAtkins;tobelefttillcalledfor,attheBelleSavageInn,onLudgate-hill.'

Inheranswer,shetellsme,'thatthevilewretchprevaileduponMrs.Bevistopersonateme,[asuddenmotionofhis,itseems,ontheappearanceofyourmessenger,]andpersuadedhertoliealongacouch:ahandkerchiefoverherneckandface;pretendingtobeill;thecredulouswomandrawninbyfalsenotionsofyourillofficestokeepupavariancebetweenamanandhiswife--andsotakingtheletterfromyourmessengerasme.

'MissRawlinstakespainstoexcuseMrs.Bevis'sintention.Sheexpressestheirastonishment,andconcernatwhatIcommunicate:butisglad,however,andsotheyareall,thattheyknowintimethevilenessofthebaseman;thetwowidowsandherselfhaving,athisearnestinvitation,designedmeavisitatMrs.Sinclair's:supposingalltobehappybetweenhimandme;asheassuredthemwasthecase.Mr.Lovelace,sheinformsme,hadhandsomelysatisfiedMrs.Moore.AndMissRawlinsconcludeswithwishingtobefavouredwiththeparticularsofsoextraordinaryastory,astheseparticularsmaybeofuse,toletherseewhatwickedcreatures(womenaswellasmen)thereareintheworld.'

Ithankyou,mydear,forthedraughtsofyourtwoletterswhichwere

interceptedbythishorridman.Iseethegreatadvantagetheywereoftohim,intheprosecutionofhisvillanousdesignsagainstthepoorwretchwhomhehadsolongmadethesportofhisabhorredinventions.

Letmerepeat,thatIamquitesickoflife;andofanearth,inwhichinnocentandbenevolentspiritsaresuretobeconsideredasaliens,andtobemadesufferersbythegenuinesonsanddaughtersofthatearth.

Howunhappy,thatthoselettersonlywhichcouldhaveacquaintedmewithhishorridviews,andarmedmeagainstthem,andagainstthevilenessof



thebasewomen,shouldfallintohishands!--Unhappierstill,inthatmyveryescapetoHampsteadgavehimtheopportunityofreceivingthem.

Nevertheless,Icannotbutstillwonder,howitwaspossibleforthatTomlinsontoknowwhatpassedbetweenMr.HickmanandmyuncleHarlowe:*acircumstancewhichgavethevileimpostormostofhiscreditwithme.

*SeethenoteinLetterLXX.ofthisvolume.

HowthewickedwretchhimselfcouldfindmeoutatHampstead,mustalsoremainwhollyamysterytome.Hemaygloryinhiscontrivances--he,whohasmorewickednessthanwit,maygloryinhiscontrivances!--But,afterall,Ishall,Ihumblypresumetohope,behappy,whenhe,poorwretch,willbe--alas!--whocansaywhat!----

Adieu,mydearestfriend!--Mayyoubehappy!--AndthenyourClarissacannotbewhollymiserable!

ENDOFVOL.6.

Vuolume 6 Clarissa

Documents

Transcript of Vuolume 6 Clarissa