Young people and spirituality: Understanding where young people are coming from in terms of spirituality and relating with them at a ‘spiritual level’

Spiritual? Mine’s a Guinness!

Mark leant over me and in confessional tones told me that he cried himself to sleep each weekend thinking about how he could escape from the hold that alcohol and cocaine had on him. He has two children that live with his ex-partner, a demanding job and a fast life style. Weekends are the main problem as that is when he begins the binge of drink and drugs which lead him into a cycle of regret, remorse and fear that perpetually turns him to prayer. He describes himself as a ‘lapsed Catholic’ and I was stunned at the depth of our conversation and the sincerity of his confession to me as a stranger he had just met, to be honest it felt very special and had the quality of an ‘ordained meeting’. I was able to offer him some support and advice, I listened to him and have been praying for him ever since.

I was in Northern Ireland to speak at a conference and decided in my free time to grab a pint of the ‘black stuff’, I had wandered into a local pub and happened to ask Mark to take my photo whilst supping my Guinness. We got talking and he soon discovered I was a Christian, at first he was shocked that I was in a pub as this didn’t fit his understanding of Christianity. Just to be clear, if I had been in a formal youth work role, with any responsibility for young people, I wouldn’t have been in the pub. However, I wasn’t in that role and my encounter with Mark has raised a couple of reflections for me that I wanted to share.

Whilst the cultural context of perceived faith in Northern Ireland is unique I find it interesting that Mark, like many young people, has a well developed and quite strong assumptions about what is and is not acceptable Christian behaviour. His perception was that his behaviour prevented him from being a Christian or receiving God’s help. I felt that my role in this ‘confessional’ encounter was to help him understand that God loved him just as he was and that Christianity was not something that excluded him because of his behaviour but was rather something that might help him with his behaviour.

It seems to me that a task for Christian youth worker is to enable young people to know that they belong and that this might lead to belief that might lead them to change the way that they behave. For some reason this process seems to have been reversed in that young people often assume that faith requires prerequisite changed behaviour, rooted in new beliefs that will enable them to belong. This is subtle stuff! My point is that I believe youth and community work is a great way of generating a sense of belonging, however, it may also require us to ‘debunk’ our own and other people’s assumptions about the ‘terms of membership’!

I also reflected on how the encounter with Mark would never have happened unless I had visited the pub and how even in writing about this I am nervous of how I will be judged by others. Perhaps I would never have crossed the road for the injured man in the story of the Good Samaritan for fear of ‘questionable association’! The truth is that I love association with people in this way and perpetually find myself having to assure ‘non believers’ that God likes and loves them despite their assumed messages to the contrary. I find that people are DEEPLY interested in spiritual issues, even though they may feel alienated from organized religion and more formal versions of Christianity.

Jesus seemed to cross social, cultural, religious and political boundaries all the time in His ministry. I wonder if we run the risk of safe, known and respectable youth/community work interventions that comply with seductively sanctimonious views of faith that spends more time identifying and patrolling

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the boundaries of faith membership than we do eating with sinners? This session looks at young people as being inherently interested in spiritual matters and how we can connect with that natural interest in meaningful ways.

Shalom - Dave Wiles (CEO Frontier Youth Trust)

In the beginning…An introduction to this theme

Spirituality is one of those vague words that seem to generate many differing definitions that are a great source of debate. Here are a few that I have collected:

Knowing something “from the inside” through establishing a relationship with a being that is greater than the self.

It is taking care of our deepest relationships with the whole world around us.

Spirituality is an inherent component of being human, and is subjective, intangible, and multidimensional.

Spirituality is incorporeal or immaterial in nature.

It refers to an ultimate reality or transcendent dimension of the world; an inner path enabling a person to discover the essence of his or her being.

It is the deepest values and meanings by which people live.

Spirituality is concerned with or affecting the spirit or soul

It is to do with the spirit or the soul as distinguished from the body or material matters

ACTION: which one of these definitions works for you and if there isn’t one either adapt one of them or come up with one of your own. When you have a definition that you are reasonably comfortable with have a think about how that definition relates to your sense of Christian mission. Which of the definitions in the list above would you not be happy with and why?

Spirituality and religion are often used interchangeably, but the two concepts are different. Spirituality involves humans’ search for meaning in life, while religion involves an organized entity with rituals and practices about a higher power or God. Spirituality may be related to religion for certain individuals, but for others, such as an atheist, it may not be. Faith is also another matter! Faith is a ‘subsection’ of religion in that it is a specific interpretation of a God or deity and a system of life based on specified doctrines and teachings.

"Why is this of any significance?" I hear you ask?! I think it is crucial in that it can redefine our sense of mission from one which is about an entrenched sense of ‘us and them’ to something that is far more inclusive and effective in building on what people already have experience of. For example, Phil Rankin has written a book called ‘Buried Spirituality’ (2005, Sarum College Press) which is based on conversations with over 200 young people during a 3 years period in nightclubs, pubs, parks, on street corners etc and his book underlines the deep interest that he found amongst young people with regard to spirituality. Phil explored young people’s perceptions of spirituality based on two key questions:

Would you perceive yourself to be spiritual? What do you think the word spiritual means?

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This in turn led to many deep and interesting conversations that lead to the conclusion that young people remain sincerely interested in spirituality despite their exodus from the church (for statistics on young people’s absence from church please see http://www.vexen.co.uk/UK/religion.html, however the diagram below offers a visual on the current situation and the projected future picture.)

One of Phil’s concluding comments in his research is,

“Young people are asking for space and opportunity to consider spiritual questions”

Perhaps an important role for us as Christian youth workers is to offer young people the time, space and opportunity to reflect on these types of questions in a safe, non-judgemental and respectful context and environment. Perhaps if we take an ‘open’ question about spirituality to people, rather than a closed answer rooted in our opinion of God (our faith system), we might discover a new model of evangelism. A model that sees and respects people’s starting points rather than assumes that they have none – this is important as it changes the dynamic in our relationship with people, it equalises our relationships, enables them to feel more at ease with us and I believe is rooted in authenticity rather than a type of ‘sales pitch’ evangelism!

Thinking it through Some theory

One of the important ways of exploring spirituality is to think about your own views in relation to the subject, these provide you with a sense of what matters to you.

ACTION: Make a list of what really matters to you in terms of spirituality. Below I have listed key factors in my thinking; these are some of my ‘givens’ and they inform my dialogue with others when exploring spirituality. You may want to reflect on my ‘givens’ (please disagree with them!) and add some of your own.

Conversion is a reality – there are many expressions of it (intellectual, emotional, instant, long term etc)

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Significant discoveries/events inform our spirituality – we all carry key stories and experiences that are foundational to our beliefs

Doubts/Questions are important as they help us to grow We are ‘journeying’ and have not ‘arrived’ Changes in belief/theology occur as we deepen (or simplify!) our spirituality ‘Kingdom’ – ‘Church’ – there is tension between these ideas, my fidelity is to the Kingdom of

Jesus and not a denominational perspective Future anticipations are high! I believe more and more about less and less and often reflect on what is it that is central to

my spirituality – there are many things that I think are not worth arguing about now (unlike when I was a younger Christian!)

I know some things, there is a lot I don’t know – but there is even more that I don’t know I don’t know!

Here are a few ways to understand spirituality that come from a theoretical perspective. As you read and think about them reflect on how they impact on your sense of mission in relation to young people’s spiritual development.

Francis Bridger (Children Finding Faith) offers us these four insights:

Insight number 1: All of us have some faith from the earliest months of life. The infant in her mother’s arms shows faith, not by believing or doing but simply by trusting….

Insight number 2: The development of faith is closely connected to the natural processes of human growth and development….

Insight number 3: Just as it is possible to chart an individual’s human growth and development so the same is true for faith… Each stage has its own characteristics and builds upon the previous ones.…

Insight number 4: The characteristics of each faith stage can be discerned by looking at the human science model….As we move on to successive stages, we can see something of what faith means in each one.

Westerhoff (Will our Children Have faith) says that we move through stages of faith development:

Stage 1 Experienced Faith Stage 2 Affiliative Faith Stage 3 Searching Faith Stage 4 Owned Faith

Fowler (Stages of Faith) has outlined more stages to spiritual development:

Stage 0: Primal Faith - foundation Stage 1: Intuitive-Projective Faith - unordered Stage 2: Mythic-Literal Faith – ordered Stage 3: Synthetic-Conventional Faith - conforming Stage 4: Individuative-Reflective Faith - choosing Stage 5: Conjunctive Faith - inclusive tage 6: Universalising Faith – selfless

Hay and Nye (The Spirit of the Child) describe the senses that apply to spiritual development:

Awareness Sensing - focussing on the here and now, tuning in to a particular experience such as music or nature, being lost or absorbed in a task or moment and focussing on the felt senses.

Mystery-sensing - Wonder and awe, for example, of the expanse of a starry sky or ultimate

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mysteries; imagination, exploring dreams and fantasy. Value-sensing - the experience of delight and despair over the events of daily life, sense of the

ultimate goodness and security, reflecting upon meaning and experiencing a sense of oneness with the universe.

ACTION: Looking back at the models above and reflect on these questions:

What can we learn from these models for our youth work? If the models have some resonance with our experience, what do we need to adjust or take

account of in our youth work? Should we work towards the ‘stepped’ approach of the models and positively enable young

people to progress through the stages, or should we just ‘let things happen’? How?

One of the huge challenges for us is to be able to enable spiritual reflection and development for young people who do not use books – the so called ‘non-book culture’. Gerard Kelly says,

“Post-literacy presents the church with both challenge and opportunity.  The challenge:  to extricate our faith from an over-dependence on text - without killing the patient in the process.  The opportunity:  to re-access, re-examine, re-imagine and re-explore “the story” in new forms.  Are we preparing our young (& old) to be pioneers in a world beyond words - or equipping them for a print age that for them no longer exists?  Old text or new context - the choice is ours”.

ACTION: Review your own activity (in terms of spirituality) in light of Gerard’s comment – does it ring a bell with you? Do you need to consider a change of approach?

Faithing the FactsSome theology

It is interesting to note that the bible uses a lot of ‘journey’ and ‘growing’ imagery when reflecting on spirituality and faith:

salm 1 describes the faithful man as being like a growing and fruitful tree. Psalm 92:12-15 describes righteous people as people who grow and flourish in faith even into old

age. In Mark 4:26, Jesus described the faithful in a parable as those like the seed sown on good soil,

producing a good crop. In 2 Thessalonians Paul told the Thessalonians that he was grateful to God because their faith was

growing. Peter told the early church that growing faith required a process much like that of a growing child:

begin with milk, and then take on more mature nourishment (1 Peter 2:2).

ACTION: take a moment to think and pray about your own spirituality, how are you growing? What is the key evidence of that growth? What might help you to grow more effectively? How is your growth linked/connected to the growth of the young people you work with do you think?

Story from the Edge This section provides a story from youth work practice that relates to the theme with reflective questions for you as an individual and/or in a group.

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My belief that young people are still seriously interested in spirituality, despite their absence from institutional church and organized religion, has been affirmed again as I trawl the streets of my city as a Street Pastor. In fact it was during a two hour slot on the streets from 2am to 4am last Friday that it happened...    I approached Naomi and Sarah as they sat on a wall overlooking a park - some 20 feet below! I just wanted to make sure that they didn’t fall, anyway, they were quite sober and responded with a smile that I had cared enough to check them out. Which led on to a conversation about what a Street Pastor was, why we did it and then a great discussion about things that mattered most in life. Naomi carried on chatting with me whilst Sarah, inspired by the philosophy of Street Pastors, went to help a couple of girls who looked a bit vulnerable down the street! Naomi continued to chat and opened up an area of life that concerned her deeply regarding her past, something that she was worried that neither she herself, nor God, would ever be able to forgive. We talked and I listened and in the end I think I was able to help her with the issue to the extent that she smiled, jumped of the wall and gave me a huge hug! I was very moved that here was a deep spiritual encounter at 2am in the morning that offered her enough hope to say that she might well give church a try again.    As we moved on I nearly missed the young girl, dressed in black, crying in the corner of the street. Thankfully Marion, my partner, didn’t miss her and I watched with a real sense of pride as this 60 year old Street Pastor reached out to the girl with some comfort and concern. She sat beside her as the girl shared how her partner and she had fallen out. Marion just listened, stroking her arm and kept all potential platitudes at a safe distance! Marion would have walked the girl back on to the main street and out of the dark, or taken her to a bus stop, but the girl just needed some more time and space on her own. We decided to check up on her in a while and prayed for her as we wandered on. It was something of a surprise when the girl caught us up and said she had decided to make it up with her partner who was just down the road. She ran past us and entered into a passionate embrace with her girl friend outside one of the ‘gay pubs’ in our city. We had a great conversation with the couple and they were keen to offer Street Pastors some financial support.    It was then that Frank approached us, he was slightly more than half cut, he looked very anxious and sounded quite depressed. I think it was the word ‘pastor’ that attracted him as he tentatively reached out to share the grief he felt at losing his dad a year ago. He had got ‘hammered’ in the pub trying to drown a sorrow that overwhelmed him, to the extent that the week before he had tried to take his own life. There are no quick fix answers to grief (I recommend you read ‘The Shack’ by William P. Young if you want to explore the subject), so we offered a sympathetic ear and gave him some of what we could - our time. It was when he began berating himself that at 20 he had wasted his life that I decided it was appropriate to share some of my own story briefly. I mentioned how 33 years ago, at 20, I had had a profound encounter with a God of love who turned my world upside down and then started me on what has been a fantastic adventure ever since! He was interested and I sensed a lifting in his spirit as I asked him what he felt his dad would want for him - he smiled and replied that his dad would want him to be happy. We then discovered that his best friend was my daughter’s boyfriends and this really seemed to inspire him to think that our encounter was ‘ordained’ - I said ‘perhaps’ and he joined us on the rest of our rounds!   

3 stories from the street then, I suppose the questions that I would like you to reflect on are: Naomi would not have darkened the door of any church and she, like most of her generation, is deeply interested in God (outside of organized religion) - how do we reach this generation (especially 18 - 25 year olds) through our youth work effectively? With no in depth exploration of the area of sexuality I just wondered if you might ask yourself what the story about the gay couple made you feel and why you think you felt that way? Finally, how do you respond to grief in your youth work? Have you explored and rehearsed some of the issues/concerns that go with it?   

Dave Wiles (CEO of Frontier Youth Trust) 

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Don’t just stand there… This section contains ideas for action – methods, tools and approaches to engage with young people – based on the session subject/content.

We have been thinking about young people in context, here are some activities for you to consider this theme and to connect with young people (the approach is ‘pick and mix’ – in other words read on and respond to one or more of the ideas that catch your eye!

ACTION: “Glimpses” (Nigel Pimlott and Steve Bullock) is a dynamic and exciting resource for youth workers, packed full of creative ideas and reflections that will help them in their work as they help young people to explore their spirituality (available from FYT on 0121 687 3505 or www.fyt.org.uk). Here is a sample exercise and consider using it with some of the young people you work with.

The Magazines exercise (page 161 of Glimpses): Equipment and materials required: Selection of magazines available across a range of subject matters. Scissors. Glue. Two envelopes. Flip chart paper. Pens.

a. Ask people to choose a picture that means something to them (It can be absolutely anything) and ask them to cut it out and stick it in the middle of a piece of flip chart paper.

b. Then give them an envelope (marked ‘A’) and invite them to follow the instructions in the envelope. Inside, put a piece of paper that asks them to write all the words and ideas which come to mind when they look at the picture. They should do this on the flip chart paper around the picture they have stuck on it.

c. When they have done this give them another envelope (marked ‘B’). Inside this envelope put a random subject from the list below. Then invite the participant to link up the subject they have been given with all the words they have already written on the flip chart.

Subjects: Hope, Peace, happiness, Life, Work, Family, Self-esteem, Values

ACTION: Why don’t you consider starting a conversation (in a safe way) with a young person that you don’t know and by asking, “have you ever had a spiritual experience”?

ACTION: consider buying or making a Labyrinth to enable young people to reflect on their spirituality – if you are not sure what they are take a look at http://www.labyrinth.org.uk/index.html

ACTION: Think about getting young people to create a “Me board” – these are art and/or word based boards that say something about s re who you are. Starting with young people’s stories. Key to ensure that this is choice with no pressure. Informal and conversational

ACTION: Make a Bedouin tent (parachutes, blankets, chairs, fairy lights etc!) with young people and when you have finished it get inside and tell some stories! Creating the right atmosphere and ambience for shared stories is crucial.

ACTION: “Spiritual Direction” – you could offer this to young people, but please make sure you implement this in a way that is safe and professional and based upon a sound working

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knowledge of what is involved. The internet will give you some ideas about what “Spiritual direction” involves, for example see http://www.soulfriend.org.uk

ACTION: Traveling with young people and learning together can be a profound experience in terms of deepening spirituality. I have written about this in “Inspire Too” (available from FYT on 0121 687 3505 or www.fyt.org.uk). Here is an extract for your interest:

“Accompanying” (See Maxine Green and Chandu Christians – see details in ‘further reading’) young people is, in my opinion, an apt definition for the role of the youth worker in relation to enabling young people to explore their spirituality; it offers a description of mutual discovery, of being alongside on the road and listening to each other, self and God.

However, I want to suggest that in actual fact the notion of spiritual development as journey is not just an abstract metaphor; it is something that becomes a reality on real journeys. Even those with the most casual knowledge of the bible will be aware that it is full of journeys, just a few examples are: Adam and Eve leaving the garden, Abraham leaving his tent for ‘he knew not where’, Moses and the Israelites back packing in Sinai, Noah and his sea voyages, Jonah’s exploits en route to Nineveh, captivities in strange lands, redevelopments in Jerusalem, Jesus’ peripatetic missionary travels over 3 years, the dispersed early church, the sending out of apostles, Paul’s great travels around the Middle East and even at the end of the bible you have John’s visions from his exile on the island of Patmos.

Indeed, Christians were first called, “people of the way”, what a pertinent description of journeying? Journeying as spirituality can be both a metaphor to guide our inner life and a potential literal experience for our spiritual development with young people.

I believe that enabling journeys in our work with young people is critical if we are interested in their spiritual development. One of the most profound youth work experiences I have had in this sphere was when I took a group of 16 youngsters to Prague.

We had planned the trip together, discussed it, prayed about it, raised the funds together and then a few weeks before we left I broke my leg and became wheelchair bound! The other youth workers and the young people were brilliant; I could often be seen hurtling across the cobbled streets of Prague with several young people pushing me whilst I sketched the passing scenery!

We spent time with Czech young people and youth leaders and listened to the stories of those who had lived through the communist era and how they had retained their sense of faith through persecution. It was a profound time as we listened and talked together, each morning we would review the previous day and say a few prayers. To my amazement as we flew home 4 of the young people approached me to ask if they might be baptised or confirmed, I had not been aware of the way in which the experience of travelling together, the stories on the road, our reflections on experience and the faith of those they had met was impacting some of the groups beliefs and spiritual journey.

The skills that I think are critical for this kind of activity include:

An ability to review and reflect on shared experience. It is much easier to have a prepared packaged view of spirituality that can be dispensed in 5 ml spoons of ‘received wisdom’ than it is to stay with an honest question about the road ahead. An open mind and heart will help and a willingness to utter the dreaded phrase, ‘I don’t know’ from time to time! This skill is about the ability to conduct intentional reflection and whilst often frowned upon by those with more didactic inclinations it is a skill that can facilitate deep and meaningful learning and change.

An ability to organise and facilitate processes that young people can enjoy together and can go deeper with in terms of inner exploration – some good group work skills! It’s really important to remember that we all learn in differing ways and to connect with learning styles in a way that enables mutual learning and discovery.

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Communication skills are an obvious skill that is required. Listening as well as speaking goes without saying and it will be critically important to be able to summarise, ask open questions, be sensitive to the groups’ mood and from time to time to offer theoretical and/or theological inputs in a way that young people can relate to. It will also be important to know when to stay silent!

A host of practical youth work skills that will enable planning, fund raising and actually journeying together is a safe, healthy and meaningful way.

It should not be assumed that this is the kind of activity, in this country or abroad, that is just relevant to or for middle class church going youngsters. It is not. I come across many projects who work in extremely challenging communities that have organised very successful mission activity at home and further afield. My friends in Easterhouse (Glasgow), who have had mutual exchange visits with youngsters in India, are a great example and many of the youngsters that I have taken on such activities have come from low income families who live in social housing.

In the final part of the chapter in ‘Inspire Too’ I explore models and descriptions of journeys with young people, outcomes for young people and those they visit and list ‘top tips’ for practice - all based on research of youth worker practice – I would of course encourage you to get your copy of Inspire Too and get on the road!

ACTION: Eating with young people – this may well be stating the obvious but there is nothing like a shared meal to open good conversation! I heard recently of a Bishop who decided to review Jesus’ model of evangelism when he was reading the gospels. He discovered that Jesus seemed to spend a large amount of time at table with people, or at parties or socializing and with this in mind the Bishop opened his home more consciously as a tool for mission – it was a great success! Give it a go!

AOB Some contacts, resources, links that relate to the session subject/content

Training:

Christian Youth Work Training – www.cywt.org.uk provides information about Christian youth work training in the UK. The site is now run by David Howell, a freelance consultant in the fields of training, Further Education, Higher Education and Christian youth work.

Frontier Youth Trust - please contact if we can help you to look a little deeper at this theme or other youth work related topics. www.fyt.org.uk

Some Web Based Resources:

Damaris at: http://www.damaris.org/ Damaris is an educational charity with a Christian foundation - but working with people of all faiths and none. Damaris is committed to rigorous study and effective communication as they seek to relate biblical Christian faith and contemporary popular culture.

UK Youth at: http://www.ukyouth.org/ UK Youth is the leading national youth work charity supporting over 750,000 young people, helping them to raise their aspirations, realise their potential and have their achievements recognised via non-formal, accredited education programmes and activities

National Youth Agency (NYA) at: http://www.nya.org.uk/ The National Youth Agency works in partnership with a wide range of public, private and voluntary sector organisations to support and

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improve services for young people. Their particular focus is on youth work

Recommended Books:

‘Buried Spirituality’ by Phil Rankin ‘Inspire Too’ (FYT) ‘Youth Work After Christendom’ by Nigel and Jo Pimlott ‘Meet Them Where they are At’ by Richard Passmore ‘A Good Childhood’ by Layard and Dunn (The Children’s Society) ‘Growing Up Evangelical: youthwork and the making of a subculture’ and/or ‘Youthwork and the

Mission of God’ by Pete Ward ‘Accompanying Young People on their Spiritual Quest.’ Maxine Green and Chandu Christian (2000)

Church House Publicity. ‘Young People and Small Groups’ and/or ‘Joined Up. An introduction to youthwork and ministry’ by

Danny Brierley ‘Well-being and Spirituality‘ by Sally Nash and Nigel Pimlott (Grove)

A very helpful listing of Christian youth work literature can be found at http://www.infed.org/youthwork/b-ywchri.htm

Amen Corner Some ideas to pray about this theme

Reflect and meditate on this quote and spend some time praying about what it says to you.

“In working with young people, do not try to call them back to where they were, and do not try to call them to where you are... You must have the courage to go with them to a place that neither you nor they have ever been before.” Vincent Donovan ‘Christianity rediscovered’

Look again at the models of spirituality that this session has offered and pray about what they say about your spirituality