Lions, Rhinos and Moose: Stories from Africa and Canada.

Lions, Rhinos and Moose: Stories from Africa and Canada

Lions, Rhinos and Moose: Stories from Africa and Canada•

Welcome back to English

Composition

Welcome back to English

Composition

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Agenda: Agenda: • Examine and practice cohesion in writingExamine and practice cohesion in writing

– Introduce topic and stressIntroduce topic and stress

• Examine coherence in writingExamine coherence in writing

• Writing WorkshopWriting Workshop

CohesionCohesion• Cohesion refers to the sense of Cohesion refers to the sense of

sentence-by-sentence flow by which we sentence-by-sentence flow by which we move easily through a passage.move easily through a passage.

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Understanding Cohesion and Coherence

Understanding Cohesion and Coherence• Read the following passages aloud. Which one is more Read the following passages aloud. Which one is more

clearly stated?clearly stated?

• The Gateway Arch at the edge of the Mississippi River in The Gateway Arch at the edge of the Mississippi River in St. Louis is the world’s tallest monument. Eero Saarinen St. Louis is the world’s tallest monument. Eero Saarinen designed the stainless steel structure that designed the stainless steel structure that commemorates the Westward Movement.commemorates the Westward Movement.

• At the edge of the Mississippi River in St. Louis stands At the edge of the Mississippi River in St. Louis stands the Gateway Arch, the world’s tallest monument. This the Gateway Arch, the world’s tallest monument. This stainless steel structure, designed by Eero Saarinen, stainless steel structure, designed by Eero Saarinen, commemorates the Westward Movementcommemorates the Westward Movement.

What makes the second seem to “flow” more easily?

Two Principles for RevisionTwo Principles for Revision1.1. Begin sentences with information that is familiar Begin sentences with information that is familiar

to your readers, usually information you’ve just to your readers, usually information you’ve just given them.given them.

2.2. End sentences with information that is new to End sentences with information that is new to your readers.your readers.

• This is called “The Known-New Contract.” This is called “The Known-New Contract.” Information moves from familiar to unfamiliar.Information moves from familiar to unfamiliar.

An ExampleAn Example• How might you fix the following sentences so that How might you fix the following sentences so that

they are more coherent?they are more coherent?• Some astonishing questions about the nature of Some astonishing questions about the nature of

the universe have been raised by scientists the universe have been raised by scientists studying black holes in space. The collapse of a studying black holes in space. The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a no larger than a marblemarble creates a black hole. creates a black hole. So much matter So much matter compressed compressed into so little volume changes the into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.

• Some astonishing questions about the nature of Some astonishing questions about the nature of the universe have been raised by scientists the universe have been raised by scientists studying black holes in space. A black hole is studying black holes in space. A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps perhaps no larger than a marble. So much matter no larger than a marble. So much matter compressedcompressed into so small a volume changes the into so small a volume changes the

fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.

An ExampleAn Example

• The Gateway Arch at the edge of the Mississippi The Gateway Arch at the edge of the Mississippi River in St. Louis is River in St. Louis is the world’s tallest monument.the world’s tallest monument. Eero Saarinen designed Eero Saarinen designed the stainless steel the stainless steel structurestructure that commemorates the Westward that commemorates the Westward Movement. Movement.

• At the edge of the Mississippi River in St. Louis At the edge of the Mississippi River in St. Louis stands the Gateway Arch, stands the Gateway Arch, the world’s tallest the world’s tallest monument. This stainless steel structuremonument. This stainless steel structure, , designed by Eero Saarinen, commemorates the designed by Eero Saarinen, commemorates the Westward MovementWestward Movement.

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What’s the Difference?What’s the Difference?

• In the 2nd paragraph, each sentence connects easily to the sentence that precedes it and the sentence that follows.

• The 2The 2ndnd paragraph has cohesion. paragraph has cohesion.

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The First Principle of Cohesion: Old FirstThe First Principle of Cohesion: Old First

• Begin your sentences with information familiar to your readers.– This can be information you’ve recently

introduced within the text.– This can be brought to the text with the

general knowledge of the audience.

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The Second Principle of Cohesion: New LastThe Second Principle of Cohesion: New Last

• End your sentences with information your readers cannot anticipate

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The Principle of Cohesion as a Law of Cognition

The Principle of Cohesion as a Law of Cognition• The principle of old-before-new is built

into our perception of time and story.

• The principle forms the conceptual basis of the introduction or background sections of an essay.

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What Cohesion Means forYour Sentence Beginnings

What Cohesion Means forYour Sentence Beginnings• Don’t begin a sentence with a bit of new

information• Don’t begin a sentence with a bit of technical

information• Use your openings to refer back to previous

material or gently introduce a new topic

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What Cohesion Means forYour Sentence Endings

What Cohesion Means forYour Sentence Endings• Don’t end a sentence with old information

• Put the new, technical, and difficult information at the end of the sentence

• Clearly signal when the end of a sentence begins

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“But then my point will be lost!”“But then my point will be lost!”

• Ending sentences with new and important information is counter-intuitive.

• We want to put the new information first, to “highlight” it.

• But if readers don’t understand its importance, placing it first will not help.

• Besides, we remember what’s last anyway.

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What Readers Remember from Sentences

What Readers Remember from Sentences• First―the sentence ending

• Second―the sentence beginning

• Last―the sentence middle

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Topic and StressTopic and Stress• The beginning of your sentence is its

topic: it’s what the sentence is about.

• The end of the sentence is its stress: it’s what the sentence delivers.

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Topic and Stress in a SentenceTopic and Stress in a Sentence

Topic (the “beginning”)

Stress (the “ending”)

Old, familiar, simple informationlinking back to previous sentences

New, complex, unfamiliar information linking forward

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Let’s add Cohesion/Coherence

Let’s add Cohesion/Coherence

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Cohesion: In-class ActivityCohesion: In-class Activity

• For practice, look at the first three sentences of a paragraph you’ve written for your About the Staff assignment

• Check to see if your sentences start with old information and end with new

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Cohesion: In-class ActivityCohesion: In-class Activity

• If the paragraph you chose does not show cohesion, please rewrite it now

• If the paragraph you chose does show cohesion, see if you can find one that doesn’t and rewrite it

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Questions?Questions?

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CoherenceCoherenceCoherence refers to the overall sense of unity in a passage

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Cohesion without CoherenceCohesion without Coherence

• As a reminder, please promptly return the lecture notes you borrowed. Slide the notes under my door if I am not there. I may become agitated if you are late, much like my Uncle Chester after several egg nogs on Christmas Eve. Most Christmases I liked to stay up and open my stockings after midnight. Staying up late was exciting and would be repeated a week later at New Year’s. So would Uncle Chester’s disgraceful behavior.

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Cohesion Vs. CoherenceCohesion Vs. Coherence

• The previous example is cohesive– Each sentence

connects with the next and the previous

– Sentences begin with familiar information

– Sentences end with new information

• But the previous example is incoherent– The paragraph has no

sense of focus– Each sentence shifts

topic from the previous

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Coherence is Established in Two Ways

Coherence is Established in Two Ways• Readers identify the topics of individual

sentences clearly

• Topics of sentences come in a connected set (usually a paragraph)

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“Sometimes I will stay up in my room for a day trying to get two sentences that will flow, that will seem as if they were always there.”

- Maya Angelou

American Poet & Autobiographer

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

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Summary of Key PointsSummary of Key Points

• Cohesion: Connect sentences by moving from old to new

• Coherence: Create thematic continuity in passages

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“Nobody should suppose that good writing―the kind that says what it means while being pleasant to read―has ever been easy.”

- Jacques Barzun

a French-born American historian of ideas and culture

who lives in San Antonio

From Dawn to Decadence: 500 Years of Western Cultural Life, 1500 to the Present

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• Finally:It’s an uphill battle(if at first you don’t succeed…..)

Writing WorkshopWriting Workshop• Get with a new partner and swap outlines for

review, share constructive comments• Spend 5 minutes • Look for

– unnecessary material? Remove it. – missing material? Add it – It is much less painful and more time-efficient to

make such decisions early, during the outline phase, rather than after you've already done a lot of writing which has to be thrown away.

Writing WorkshopWriting Workshop• Freewrite about one section of your outline

for 5 minutes .

Keeping goingKeeping going• Brainstorm, Question, Mind-map, Freewrite/Loop

about each section of your outline• Share writing early and often with your group and

me • Deal with procrastination. Keep lists of tasks,

broken in to small manageable pieces, including writing tasks (a few pages at a time).

• Identify a time and location where you can write with good focus and few distractions, and take advantage of it daily.

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Wrap-upWrap-up• Examined and practiced cohesion in writingExamined and practiced cohesion in writing

– Introduced topic and stressIntroduced topic and stress• Examined coherence in writingExamined coherence in writing• Outlines are due Friday, 11/30Outlines are due Friday, 11/30• No late submissionsNo late submissions• Typed in Times New Roman 12, Word, double-spacedTyped in Times New Roman 12, Word, double-spaced• Hardcopy with your nameHardcopy with your name• List of your reviewers from class (at least 3 names)List of your reviewers from class (at least 3 names)• Include your outline worksheetInclude your outline worksheet

Lions, Rhinos and Moose: Stories from Africa and Canada.

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