Editorial Pleased to announce that
all the Lomandra plants
have been issued raising
approximately $4600 dol-
lars.
Ross’s visit to Grenfell with
Steve went well, meets be-
ing held with the Rotary
club of Grenfell and staff
of Henry Lawson High. It
is planned that Grenfell
Year 10 students will be
hosted by Springwood Ro-
tary for a weeks work expe-
rience the 3rd week in No-
vember.
The guest speaker this
week, Vent Thomas is from
the Board of the Blue
Mountains Business
Chamber (Biznet). Vent
spoke on the history of
Chambers of Commerce
and about Biznets begin-
ning in 2000. The organi-
sation currently with 200
members and a board of
11. It acts as a advocate for
the local business commu-
nity offering network
events, seminars such as
financial planning, holds
business awards and offers
a mentoring program. The
organisation is undergoing
a name change to Blue
The Other News…
Happy
September
Birthdays to…
Margaret Boyle
Robyn Crouch
Norm Kitto
Jennifer Wearne
Happy
September
Wedding
Anniversary
to ...
Margaret & Richard
Bell
Volume 31, Issue 10 8th September, 2014
SPRINGWORD The official Bulletin of The Rotary Club of Springwood Inc.
Chartered 4th December 1984 CLUB 22213 Postal Address P.O. Box 45, Springwood, N.S.W, 2777
See the District 9685 website http://rotarydistrict9685.org.au Club Website www.springwoodrotary.org.au
Of the things we
think, say, or do
Is it the truth?
Is it fair to all con-
cerned?
Will it build good
will and better
friendships?
Will it be beneficial
to all concerned?
Inside this issue...
GARY C.K. HUANG is the 2014-2015 President of Rotary International
His theme is “Light Up Rotary”
Introduction : Yvonne Meehan
Thanks : Steve Elliott
This Week’s Meeting…
Neville Burns -
Snake Handler / Author
Mountains Regional Busi-
ness Chamber.
Within the club John
Lambert is currently
working on the clubs final
report of last years Match-
ing Grant; ‘Training den-
tal staff in the Congo’.
As District Trainer, Paul
Erickson is organising a
joint 5 District Rotary
Leadership Seminar (Sat.
18 Oct) at RI offices Par-
ramatta and Presentation
Skills training (Sun 19th
Oct) to be held in Castle
Hills. Interested members
please contact Paul.
Ross Ingram
President
From the President 1
Money Stuff 2
Dates for Your Diary 2
Club News 2
Humour 3
Rotary News 4
Members of the Board
4
Last Meeting Stats 4
Treasurer Norm has emailed all members the club’s cur-
rent financial statements.
Money Stuff - Dates for Your Diary...
September is New Generations Month
Sep 6 Working Bee Buttenshaw Park
Sep 8 Meeting - Neville Burns - Snake Handler / Author
Sep 15 Meeting - Rebecca Har r is - After Care
Sep 22 Meeting - Club Assembly
Sep 27 Blue Gum Markets
Sep 29 Meeting - David Berger
Oct 6 No Meeting
Oct 13 Meeting - Pride of Workmanship Awards
Oct 20 Meeting - Peter Sweeney - Gallipoli
Oct 25 Blue Gum Markets
Oct 27 Meeting - Jennifer Scott - Bullying
Nov 3 Meeting - Sue Bell & Irene Morr ison - India / Po-
Club News … Apologies are to be phoned to Bill Clague preferably by text message (SMS) on 0400 802 448, or email
- [email protected], or on 4751 1089 by 5pm on Sunday. Reminder: You will be required to pay
for any meals not cancelled .
Report on PDG Bob Aitken’s illness.
Conference report form AG and Conference treasurer Ivan.
Members urged to book accommodation ASAP
Early bird registrations close in November
If members have problems with registration contact Ivan for help.
I am looking for suggested sites for the Graffiti Removal Day in October, preferably with the following crite-
ria: Safe and at a level which does not require ladders or climbing; Publicly visible; Preferably over-painting
only; Minimal chemical removal OK, so long as we can use smaller gurneys; Location Springwood/
Faulconbridge/Winmalee. Thanks! Jenny Y. Meehan
Videos of the Week Just click on each picture, then click to play
iPad Zauberer
Simon Pierro
Liveauftritt
[subtitled]
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take
it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on
someone you don't know, but you know deserves it...
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to
make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying 'Hello.'
I politely said, 'This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?'
Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear 'Get the right phone num-
ber!' And the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that
anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down Robyn's correct number
to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.
After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled 'You're an asshole!'
And hung up.
I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, And put it in
my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had
a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, 'You're an asshole!' It always
cheered me up.
When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole' call-
ing would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, 'Hi, this is John
Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar
with our Caller ID Program?'
He yelled 'NO!' And slammed down the phone.
I quickly called him back and said, 'That's because you're an asshole!'
and hung up.
One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had
patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for
that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a 'For Sale' sign in his back
window, so I wrote down his number. A couple of days later, right after
calling the first asshole (I had his number on speed dial) I thought that
I'd better call the BMW asshole, too.
I said, 'Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?'
He said, 'Yes, it is.'
I then asked, 'Can you tell me where I can see it?'
He said, 'Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd. , in Fairfax
It's a yellow ranch style house And the car's parked right out in front.'
I asked, 'What's your name?'
He said, 'My name is Don Hansen.'
I asked, 'When's a good time to catch you, Don?'
He said, 'I'm home every evening after five.'
I said, 'Listen, Don, can I tell you something?'
He said, 'Yes?'
I said, 'Don, you're an asshole!'
Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.
Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.
Then I came up with an idea...
I called asshole #1.
He said, 'Hello'
I said, 'You're an asshole!'
(But I didn't hang up.)
He asked, 'Are you still there?'
I said, 'Yeah!'
He screamed, 'Stop calling me'
I said, 'Make me.'
He asked, 'Who are you?'
I said, 'My name is Don Hansen.'
He said, 'Yeah? Where do you live?'
I said, 'Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd., in Fairfax, a yellow ranch
style home and I have a black Beamer parked in front.'
He said, 'I'm coming over right now, Don.
And you had better start saying your prayers.'
I said, 'Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole,' and hung up.
Then I called Asshole #2.
He said, 'Hello?'
I said, 'Hello, asshole,'
He yelled, 'If I ever find out who you are...'
I said, 'You'll what?'
He exclaimed, 'I'll kick your ass'
I answered, 'Well, asshole, here's your chance.
I'm coming over right now.'
Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I was on
my way over to 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, to kill my gay lover.
Then I called Channel 7 News about the gang war going down in Oak-
tree Blvd in Fairfax .
I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax .
I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of
each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and
surrounded by a news crew.
NOW I feel much better. Anger management really does work.
Trying To Feed Five Thousand Today
MEMBERS OF THE BOARD 2014-2015
President : Ross Ingram
Vice President : Pat Ainslie
Past President : Laur ie Waterson
Honorary Secretary : Laur ie Waterson
Honorary Treasurer : Norman Kitto
Community Service Directors : Steve Elliott /Robyn
Crouch
International Service Director : Margaret Bell
Vocational Services Directors : Bill Clague / Carol Brandt
Youth Director : Warwick Har r ison
Foundation Director: C. Kenney / J . Lamber t / J . Wearn
*********
Sergeant at Arms : Cheryl Kitto / J eff Sprague
Historian: Alan Cameron
Speaker Coordinator : Yvonne Meehan
Springword Editor : Marilyn Kenney
DATE SPEAKER INTRODUCE THANKS
8.9.14 Neville Burns Y. Meehan S. Elliott
15.9.14 Rebecca Harris G Sprague W. Harrison
22.9.14 Club Assembly
29.9.14 David Berger W Harrison I. Fedor
13.10.14 PRIDE OF WORKMANSHIP AWARDS
20.10.14 Peter Sweeney R Ingram D Rayner
MEETING STATISTICS 1/9/2014
Current Membership 38
Attendance tonight 23
Effective Attendance 28
Percentage 72%
Raffle Winner Ross Ingram
Pick-A-Card Bronwyn Berriman (no joker)
Exchange Student
Visiting Rotarians
Members’ Guests
Guest Speakers Vent Thomas
The District 9685 Conference 2015will be held at the Hunter Valley on March 20 - 22. Registrations are now open . Just click on the icon above to go to the site.
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