cOnTenTs
AbouttheContributors 9 Introduction 11
1.MindingYourDignity: “Thereismoretoyouthanyouknow.” 15 Rosalie de Rosset 2.FindingYourVoice:KnowingandBeingKnown 35 Pam MacRae 3.Longing:FromDisparitytoDesire 55 Linda Haines 4.“EverythingIsTheological” 75 Rosalie de Rosset 5.DistractedorDignified?:“SolidorGhostly” 95 Rosalie de Rosset 6.MindfulorMindless:ATheologyofPlay 117 Rosalie de Rosset 7.ReadingasaSpiritualExercise 137 Rosalie de Rosset 8.SexualDignity:NotbyAccident 157 Linda Haines 9.ATheologyofModesty:NakedyetUnashamed 181 Stacie Parlee-Johnson10.IsItWorthIt?IsHeWorthy? 199 Rosalie de Rosset
Appendix1:ItShouldn’tBeEasy 211 Appendix2:“SoMuchfromSoLittle” 215 Notes 221 Resources 233 Acknowledgments 237
chapTeR 1
MIndIng YOUR dIgnITY“There is more to you than you know.”
BY ROsalIe de ROsseT
DIGNITY: Formal, grave or noble bearing, conduct or speech; nobility or elevation of character.
The quality or condition of being worthy, esteemed or honored; inherent nobility and worth; poise and self-respect; formal reserve or
seriousness of manner appearance, or language.1
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She is clothed with strength and dignity. . . .
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
PROVERBS31:25–26 (niv)
The dIgnIfIed WOMan
Inthespringof2011,thenewestmovieversionofJane Eyre,basedontheextraordinary1847novelbyCharlotteBrontë,
openedintheatersacrossthecountry.Thoughtherehavebeenanumberoffilmsbasedonthenovelthroughouttheyears,manycriticspraisedit.Inearliermovies,somecriticsnoted,theleadcharactershaveoftenbeentoogood-looking,thefemaleheroinetoomild-mannered,bothoftheserepresentationsnotinlinewithBrontë’scharacterization.
Iwasstruckbythewordsoftwocritics. WritingforChicago’sThe Reader,J.R.Jonesnotes,“CastinghandsomestarsintheleadroleshasbeenachroniccompromiseinadaptingJaneEyre,whoseheroineisrepeatedlydescribedasplainlookingandwhoseheroisdownrightugly.”Moreimportant,however,hewritesaboutJanethefollowingwords:“[InJane Eyre],Brontëstruckamightyblowforhergenderwhenshecreatedhertitlecharacterandnarrator,anorphanedgirlwhomaturesintoaformidablyself-possessedyoungwoman;Jane’smoralsensibilityissodetailed,sofullyrealizedthatnoreadercouldthinkheranylessapersonthanthemensurround-ingher.”2 Inotherwords,hereisawomantobetakenseriouslybecauseofhercharacter.
“Aformidablyself-possessedyoungwomanwithafullyreal-
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ized,detailedmoralsensibility.”That’sadescriptionthatdeservesattention.Idecidedtolookateachprimarywordorphraseofthesentencetoremindmyselfexactlywhattheymean.It’ssoeasytomissthebeautyoffinelanguage.Thedictionarydefinestwoofthewordsasfollows.Formidable:causinggreatrespect,evenfear;self-possessed:someonewhohascontrolofherlongingsandattendantfeelingsandbehaviorespeciallywhenunderpressure.Fully realized, detailed moral sensibilitymeansthatJanehasdevelopedandrefinedherconvictions,intellect,andlongingstoagreatcapacity.Sheisawomanofcharacter,whatonewritercalls“theinnerformthatmakesanyoneoranythingwhatitis—whetheraperson,awineorahistoricalrecord.”3
Although I have heard speakers and leaders stress the importance of humility and honesty for women, I have heard little or no admonition to them to be spirited.
Jonesisnotaloneinhisassessment.A.O.Scott,writingfortheNew York Times,says,“JaneEyremaylackfortuneandgoodlooks—sheisfamously‘smallandplain’aswellas‘poorandobscure’—butastheheroineofanovel,shehaseverything.Fromtheveryfirstpages...Janeembodiesvirtuesthatmightbeoff-puttingiftheywerenotsopersuasive....Sheisbrave,humble,spiritedandhon-est,thekindofpersonreadersfallinlovewithandbelievethem-selvestobeintheirinnermosthearts.”4HereinasecularvenueisareviewerwhoatonceacknowledgesthatJaneisplainandpoorandcontendswithadmirationthatsheisayoungwomanwhohas
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“everything.”Theeverythingshehas,Scottsays,isthatsheis“humble,spiritedandhonest.”Spiritedisaworddefinedas“fulloforcharacterizedbyanimation,vigor,orcourage.”5Scottalsoadmitsthathervirtuesare“off-puttingiftheywerenotsopersuasive,”aparticularlyintriguingphrase.Howinterestingthatacontempo-rary,secularcritichasfoundaplainwomantohave“everything.”And,Imightadd,howcomfortingandunusual.Thathethinksread-ers“believethemselvestobe[Jane]intheirinnermosthearts”hastobeamarkofwhatmanywomenandsomemenwanttobesincetherealityisthatfewpeopletodayarelikeJane.EvenfewerquicklyadmiretheJanestheymeetinreallife,atellingirony.
Overaperiodofthirty-fiveyears,Ihavespokenatagreatmanyconferencesandseminarsforwomenofallages,butIhaveneverseenadvertisedorheardatalkentitled,“Howtobecomeaformi-dable,self-possessedwomanoffullyrealizedmoralsensibility.”AlthoughIhaveheardspeakersandleadersstresstheimportanceofhumilityandhonestyforwomen,Ihaveheardlittleornoadmoni-tiontothemtobespirited,eventhoughthedefinitionofthewordasnotedabovedescribesacommendable,evennecessaryattributeforawomanofcharacter.
Ican’thelpstoppingonthelastreviewer’swordsthatJanehasvirtueswhichare“off-puttingiftheywerenotsopersuasive.”IthinkwhathemeansisthatJaneknowshermind,aqualitythatisalwaysstartling,eventhreatening.InsomeChristiancirclesthiswouldbeseenastheproverbial“toostrong.”Janeisapersonofgreatconviction,whichsometimesmeanstellingahardtruthwhenitneedstobesaid.Whatispersuasiveisthatfinally,JaneEyreisvirtuous(anotherconceptonehearslittleabout)anddignifiedinthewaythatElizabethBennet,theheroineofPride and Prejudice,
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alsois,withthedifferencethatJane’schoicesareinfluencedbyGod’sovertactioninherlife.Thefoundationalpremiseintheseremarksisthatittakesspiritednessandconvictionandeventellingahardtruthtobetrulyvirtuousanddignified,avirtueanddignitythatinvolvespurposefulattentiontoone’smind,one’ssoulanditslongings,andone’sspirit,allofwhichaffectone’sphysicallife.
ItseemspossibletosuggestthattheaverageChristiangirlandwomanmaylearnmoreabouthowtodothisfromclassicnovelslikethoseofJaneAustenandCharlotteBrontëthanfromaChristianwomen’smagazine,aChristianromancenovel,aChristian-livingbook,orfromsomewomen’sconferences.Icanhearsomereaderssaying—can’tyoufindsomethingmorecurrentthanthesebookstoillustrateyourpointwithcontemporarywomen?Thedefinitionofclassicisaworkthatlasts,thatisdatedonlyinsuperficialdetailsuchasparticularitiesofdressandspeech,butwhosethemesareuniversalandtimeless.Thesenovelsarespecific,hard-hitting,donotresorttopiousclichés,andtheyshowconsequences.Theyshowinsteadofjusttelling,oneofthefirstprinciplesanywritingorspeechteachertellsherstudents.Theyarealsoelegantlywritten.And,whileprofoundlymoral(alltruthisGod’struth),thisnovelisnot“religious,”generallyorspecifically.
Belovedforyearsbywomenofeveryageandclass,Pride and Prejudiceanditsvariousfilmtakesshowthecontrastbetweensillywomenwhomakepoorchoicesandaheroinewho,whileflawed,isneverthelessprincipled,modest,noble,self-disciplined,anddigni-fied.Evennon-Christianwomenwhosemoralcode,philosophyofmodesty,anddatingbehavioraren’tremotelylikethoseofthenovels’charactersappeartobeengaged.Onecanonlyspeculate,then,thatwomenyearnfortheverydignityandrestraintthey
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eschewbyallowingthemselvestobeclonesoftheculture;theylongtoberespectedandcherishedevenwhentheychoosemenwhodoneither;theywanttobelikeElizabethBennetandJaneEyreoratleasttoendupbeinglovedastheseheroinesarebygoodmen.Manyofthem,Christianandnon-Christianseem,however,unabletonavigatethepathstosuchconclusions.
ElizabethBennet,whilehavingattractivefeatures,isnotsaidtobebeautiful.Whatemergesfarmoreclearlyisherwit,herintel-ligence,herhonestyinspeakinghermind,herrefusaltoacceptdisrespectevenfromthemansheloves,herwillingnesstobealoneratherthancompromisehersoul,andherindependenceexercisedwithrestraint.Insummary,sheisthepictureofdignity.
Andthatiswhatseldomcomesuptoday,thecrucialrolethatdignityneedstoplayinthedevelopmentofeverywomanwhoclaimstoknowJesusChristaspersonalSavior.Thisiswhatneedstoinformeveryfacetofawoman’slife,everychoiceshemakes.I’mnotevensuredignityisawordanyonehasthoughtaboutforalongtime.
WhaT dO YOU ThInk?
IhavewonderedthroughtheyearswhoChristianwomen’srolemodelsareandiftheyaregettingthepurposefulguidancetheyneedfromolderwomen.IhaveinformallyaskedgroupsofyoungwomenthisquestionyearlyinaclassIteach.Dependingontheyear,threeorfournamescomeup.Oneortwoofthemisusuallythelatestwell-knownfemaleauthor/speakeroftheday;theothersarehistoricalfigureslikeSusannaWesleyorAmyCarmichael.Ortheynameagrandmother,amother,orasister,somethingwhichusuallyhasmoreconvictionandspecificity.ThewomenIaskseem
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tohaveahardtimethinkingofpeopleorarticulatingwhattheyaremodelingthemselvesafter.
IfoundinterestingwhatoneyoungwomanwroteaboutEmmaWatson,whoplaysHermioneGrangerintheHarryPotterfilmseries.“Whenayoungwomanhasgrownupwithmillionsofpeoplewatchingherentireadolescentdevelopment,criticizingandcon-trollingherphysicalappearance,andconfusingheridentitywiththatofafictionalcharacter,thepressuresmakeconsistentdignityseemimpossible.EmmaWatsonhaslivedthislifewithdignityandself-respect,prizinghereducation,maintainingprivacy,avoidingscandals,conductinginterviewsandpublicstatementswithgrace,andencouragingotherwomentohaveself-respect.”6Whetherornotyouagreewiththisassessment,ithitsmanyoftherightnotes.
So,Iaskyoutothinkaboutthequestion:Whatdoyouthinkofwhenyouheartheworddignity?Perhapsmorespecifically,whodoyouthinkof?Whatpersoncomestomind?Isitapopularsinger,speaker,movieactress,orperhapsafriendorrelative?Andhowdoyoupicturedignity?Isitsomethingyouaspiretobe?Whatwouldyouchangeaboutyourselftobedignified?
dIgnITY defIned
Dignity:theword,again,deservesacloselook.Thefirstorseconddefinitionsofthewordfromavarietyofdictionariesareasfollows:“formal,graveornoblebearing,conductorspeech;nobilityoreleva-tionofcharacter;thequalityorconditionofbeingworthy,esteemedorhonored;inherentnobilityandworth;poiseandself-respect;formalreserveorseriousnessofmannerappearance,orlanguage.”
Dignity,itisclear,isnotthesamethingaspoise;itisnotthesamethingasbeauty,anditiscertainlynotthesamethingasstyle
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though,ofcourse,adignifiedpersonmayhaveanyoneorallofthosequalities.Probablythecharacteristicmostconfusedwithdignityispoise,definedas“tobebalancedorheldinequilibrium:balance;freedomfromaffectationorembarrassment;composure.”7Littleaboutthisdefinitionsuggestsmuchabouttheinternalval-uesofthepersonorabouthercharacter;instead,itdescribesanoutwardbehaviorthatmayormaynotbeinfluencedbyinternalstabilityandintegrity.Manyofthecelebritiespresentedtousinmediaoutletshavebeenpoised,althoughadmittedly,eventhatisbecomingathingofthepastasonelooksattheembarrassingandludicrousbehaviorofsomanywhoarehavingwhatAndyWarholcalledtheirfifteenminutesoffame.
The truth of the matter is that most of us are in process, no matter what our age.
ProbablyoneofthemostfamousindividualsinmodernhistorywhoconsistentlyanddeservedlyhasbeencalledpoisedisPrin-cessDiana,whosedecisions,asshesuffereddisappointmentandbetrayal,weredeeplyflawedandledtoundignifiedchoicesandthetragedyofherlife.Interestinglyenough,MotherTeresa,whodiedwithinafewdaysofPrincessDiana,wasprobablyseldomdescribedaspoised,butalwaysseenasdignified,anissueofcharacter.Inrecenthistory,LauraBushwasseenbyalmosteveryoneonbothsidesofthepoliticalspectrumasdignifiedandgraceful.Thesewerequalitiesthatemanatedfromherperson;whilenotbeautiful,shewasoftenradiantwithoutbeingshowy;whenaskedhard,evenrudequestionsbyherhusband’senemies,sheansweredwithgra-
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ciousconviction,andsometimesasenseofdisarminghumor.ShehandledthedutiesoftheWhiteHousewithoutbringingattentiontoherself;shewasmodestandcontained.
Dignitycontainswithinit,asthedefinitionssuggest,notonlynoblebearing,afacetofappearance,butalsonoblecharacter whichcomesfrominherent nobilityandworth.Thatmeansthepersonissureofhervaluesandbeliefs,sheissoberandthoughtfulabouteverypartofherlife.And,whatthisdiscussionistryingtodoistointroducetoyoudignity’simportance,nottopresentyetanotherunreachableideal.Ifyoucanseethecrucialroleofaquality,itispossibletobeginthejourneytowardthatqualitybecauseitprom-isesalifeofgreaterintegrity.Thetruthofthematteristhatmostofusareinprocess,nomatterwhatourage.Itiseasierforsomeofustolookdignifiedthanothers,buttotrulybedignifiedissomethingdifferentthathasanumberofcomponents.
JustasIhaveneverheardorseenadvertisedaseminarcalled“Howtobecomeaformidable,self-possessedwomanoffullyreal-izedmoralsensibility,”Ihavealsoneverseenoneentitled“HowtoBeDignifiedinYourChoices,”thoughofcoursewisebooksandinnumerablearticleshavebeenwrittenandcountlesspresentationsmadeaboutmakinggoodchoices.Oddlyenough,givenitsimpor-tance,oneseldomhearstheworddignitydiscussedasavalueforhumanbehaviorbynon-ChristiansorChristiansalthoughitmaybeusedtodescribesomeonefromtimetotime.Ifyoudoacursorysearchofarticlesondignity,besidesrandomreferencesinChris-tianblogshereandthere,you’llfindmostlypiecesaddressedtothemedicalandsocialservicescommunities,articlesabouthelpingpeople todiewithdignityandthedisenfranchisedtofinddignitythroughabetterlife.JohnPaulIIwroteaboutthedignityofwomen
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inoneofhisapostolicletters,arguingthatChristianity,morethan“anyotherreligion”hasgivenwomenspecialdignityandurgesthechurchtousetheminmoresignificantways.
Dignity is a strong, chosen, deliberate way of life, the result of the totality of a person’s choices and worldview.
WhendignityistalkedaboutamongChristianwomen,itmostoftenhastodowiththepassagesaboutwives’behaviorin1Timo-thyandtheproverbial“quietandsubmissivespirit,”aphrasethatisseldomcorrectlyscripturallyinterpretedandistoooftenequatedwithpassivitycontributingtowomen’svoicelessness.Passivity,wroteoneclinicalpsychologist,“isbornofanxiety;itisafearofus-ingourenergieslestweriskdisapprovalbyothersorriskfailureinourowneyes....Itisadisowningofournoblerparts—ourself-re-liance,ourcourageunderfire,ourresolvetowin,ourdeterminationtoinspireotherstogreaterheights.”8
dIgnITY lIved OUT
TobeaChristianwomanofdignity,awomanmustknowwhosheisbeforeGod;shemusthavedealtthoughtfullywithherperson-hoodandmadedecisionsaboutwhoshewillbe.Dignityisastrong,chosen,deliberatewayoflife,theresultofthetotalityofaperson’schoicesandworldview.WhichtakesusbacktoJaneEyre,whoisamodelofthatkindofliving.Again,Ichosethisbook,notbecauseofitsage,butbecauseofitsunusualcentralcharacter,onewhosestrengthandcharacterstandoutenduringly.
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JaneEyreenduresoppression,starvation,madness,conde-scension,andcoldness.Sheispresentedwithanumberofwomenrolemodelswhomsheobserves,learnsfrom,anddepartsfromtobecomeherownperson.Oneofthosemodelsistooideal,toocompliant,thoughgood.Anotheristooangelic,andstillanothersometimespassive-aggressive.Janeistoostrongtocompromiseherconvictions,andsheispassionate,qualitieswhichpresentedproblemsforVictoriancriticsandperhapsforustodayattimes.And,shedarestosuggestthatsinglenessispreferabletoaninap-propriatemarriage.
Ifyouknowthestoryatall,JaneEyreistheaccountofayoung,orphanedBritishgirlwhogoestolivewithanauntandcousins,allofwhomtreathercruelly.Sheisthensenttoaboardingschoolforpoorgirls,whereasupposedlyChristiandirector,actuallyamon-ster,treatstheorphansabusivelyandtyrannically—manyofthemdyingofcold-relatedillnessesandstarvation.Allofthishashistori-calprecedentinthetimesofthenovelandwaspartofCharlotteBrontë’sandhersisters’experience.
Jane,whodoesnothavetheadvantageofgoodlooksorgoodfortune,survivesinspiritbecauseshechoosesthepathherlife(spirit,mind,andbehavior)willtake,oftenagainstculturalmoresandcorruptauthoritativevoices,Shehasasenseofvoicefromthetimesheisachildandtellsthetruthineverycircumstance,evenwhenitcouldendangerherwell-being.Thoughshemustlearntorefineherexpression,shewillnotsilencethevoiceofherintellec-tualneedsormutehermoralvoicebycompromisinghercharacterwithpoorrelationalorsexualchoicesforthesakeoffleetinghappi-ness.Sherisestoahigherstandard,aGod-givenunderstandingofrighteousness.
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So,firstofall,shetellsthetruth, arighteoustruth.Shetrustsherinstincts—somethingwomenareoftenpronetoignore.Shedoesn’tgoalongwiththeconventionalwisdomthatsays“keepquiet,taketheabuse,answerquestionsthewayyou’reexpectedto.”Shecallsherauntonhercruelbehavior.Sherefusestogivepiousanswerstotheevilschooldirector,Mr.Brocklehurst,whenheaskshersupposedly“spiritualquestions”abouttheBible.Listentothefollowingexchange—startingwithhisattempttointimidateher.
“Doyouknowwherethewickedgoafterdeath?”“Theygotohell,”wasmyreadyandorthodoxanswer.“Andwhatishell?Canyoutellmethat?”“Apitfulloffire.”“Andshouldyouliketofallintothatpit,andtobeburningthereforever?”
“Nosir.”“Whatmustyoudotoavoidit?”...“Imustkeepingoodhealth,andnotdie.” [repliesJane]9
Thereadercan’thelpsmilingatthischildlikehonesty,butalsothekindoftruthfulspiritthatwillbecome“astrongmoralsensibil-ity.”That’sthekindofwomenIthinkJesuswantsustobe—that’sthekindofbiologicalandspiritualdaughtersHewantsustoraise,womenwhohavearighteousinstinctforrecognizing,naming,andresistingabuseandfalsehood.
WhenJaneleavestheboardingschool,shegoestoThornfield,anestatewhereshebecomesagovernessforayounggirl.Thejobofgovernesswasonlyasgoodastheemployermadeit.Anythingcouldbedonetogovernesses,and,becauseofwhattheyendured,the
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proportionoftheminmentalasylumswassubstantial.WhileJaneisgratefulforthejob,sheisnotsubservient.Sheremarks:
Itisinvaintosayhumanbeingsoughttobesatisfiedwithtranquility;theymusthaveaction;andtheywillmakeitiftheycannotfindit.... Womenaresupposedtobeverycalmgenerally:butwomenfeeljustasmenfeel;theyneedexercisefortheirfaculties,andafieldfortheireffortsasmuchastheirbrothersdo;theysufferfromtoorigidarestraint,tooabsoluteastagnation,preciselyasmenwouldsuffer....Itisthoughtlesstocondemnthem,orlaughatthem,iftheyseektodomoreorlearnmorethancustomhaspronouncednecessaryfortheirsex.10
Thesewordsstillringstrongtodayastheywereshockingthen,160yearsago,buttheyshowanaccurateunderstandingoftheneedforwomen,ashumanbeings,tofulfilltheirgifts,tousetheircreativity,tostretchbeyondprescribedactivitiesandpassivitytotruehumanity.Dignityrequiresthedevelopmentofprincipleandtheuseofintelligence.
WhenJanemeetsRochester,herboss,andthemanwhobe-comesthegreatloveofherlife,sheneverthelesskeepshersenseofvoice,outrageousthenasitisnow.Atonepoint,whenhehasbeencondescendingtoher,shesaystohimarticulatelytosaytheleast:
Doyouthink,becauseIampoor,obscure,plain,andlittle,Iamsoullessandheartless?—Youthinkwrong!—Ihaveasmuchsoulasyou,—andfullasmuchheart!...Itismyspiritthataddresses
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yourspirit;justasifbothhadpassedthroughthegrave,andwestoodatGod’sfeet,equal,—asweare!11
Thisisnotawomanwhocanbeputdownorforcedintofalsesubmissionbyhersocialpositionorthedominanceofthemanwholovesher.CharlotteBrontëwasseverelycriticizedforthisworkbecauseshedaredtoportrayawomanwhowouldnotsurrendertotheworstofherculture’sexpectations—wouldnotgiveuphersenseofselfandconviction,nomatterwhathersocialcaste.ThisisawomanwhoputsahighvalueonherselfasGoddoesalso.Inherowndefense,inthefaceofcriticswhoaccusedherofpresentinganinappropriatemodelforyoungwomenandwhocalledhersensibil-ity“masculine,”Brontëwrotethefollowingwordsintheprefacetothenovel’ssecondedition:“Conventionalityisnotmorality.Self-righteousnessisnotreligion.Toattackthefirstisnottoassailthelast.TopluckthemaskfromthefaceofthePharisee,isnottoliftanimpioushandtotheCrownofThorns.”12Inotherwords,whathasalwaysbeendoneculturallyisnotthesameasmoralprinciple.PointingoutthehypocrisyofwhatapersonorchurchhasdecidedisappropriateisnotanattackonthepersonofJesusChrist.
As I say to my students, Jane and Rochester are not just “in heat.”
Iwonderhowmanyyoungwomenreadingthisfeelthatsenseofself,thatsenseofworthbeforeGod,aworththatextendstotheirchoicesandabilitytostandforwhattheyknowisright?Iwonderhowmanywomeningeneralcanmakethedistinctionbetween
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whattheirsubculturedictates(thechurch,thecirclestheyoccupy)andtruemorality,betweentheself-righteousnessofpeerpressureandtrueconviction,betweenpharisaicaldemandsandwhatChristwantsHisdaughterstobe?
NotonlyisJanetruthfulandthoughtful,butsheisalsomorallyresolute;shedoestherightthinginthefaceofgreattemptation,arighteousbehaviorwhichisnotaccidentalbutbornofawhole lifefilledwiththepracticeofcharacter,whatwewouldcallholiness.So,whenJanemustleaveRochester,whomshehasinherneedforlovemadeagod(Iwillnotinsertaspoilerforthosewhohavenotreadthenovel)yetwithwhomshehasfallendeeplyinlove,sherunslikeJosephranfromPotiphar’swife.Thisisnosmallact,astheloveJaneandRochesterfeelforeachotheriscompletelydifferentfromtheshallowrelationshipsusuallydrawninformulaicChristianorsecularromancenovelsandeveninsomepersonalaccounts.
InmuchthesamewaythatDarcyandElizabethareattractedtoeachotherinPride and Prejudice,JaneandRochesteraredrawntoeachotherbecauseeachfindstheothersointeresting.Eachadmirestheother’sstrengthandthoughtfulness(bythisImeangivingthoughtto)asshowninbehaviorandconversation.Eachchallengestheotherinthebestsenseoftheword.Thisisaconnectionofthemindswhichleadstoadeeper,moreenduringpassionthanthatsparkedbyalesslayeredattraction.AsIsaytomystudents,JaneandRochesterarenotjust“inheat.”So,Jane’srefusingtosinistheresultofhermoralresolve,hersenseofidentitybeforeGod,herchoiceofwhatisrightoverwhattheheartwants.Herchoiceis“spirited.”Thisistherefusaltosurrendertodesperationorfearofbeingalone;itshowsnobilityofcharacteranddignifiedliving.
ListentotheprocessJanegoesthroughinthemidstofloss,of
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homelessness,ofnothingtoquietherterrorbutGodandinthefaceofheroverpoweringlove,attraction,andcompassionforRochester.Firstofall,sheasksherselfthequestionanywomanwhohaslovedcanunderstand.Thinkofatimewhenyouhavebeendatingamanwhohasapornographyproblem,whoisnottreatingyouwell,orwhoisn’tgoodforyouspiritually,emotionally,orphysically.Janefeelstornbyherbeloved’sdesolation—shewantsinourvernacular“tobethereforhim.”Shesays,“Feeling...clamouredwildly.‘Oh,comply!’itsaid....‘Soothehim;savehim;lovehim;tellhimyoulovehimandwillbehis.Whointheworldcaresforyou?orwhowillbeinjuredbywhatyoudo?’”Inthewakeofherpity,herhabitofthinkingrationallyandtheologicallyandherself-respectkickin.“Stillindomitablewasthereply—‘Icareformyself.Themoresolitary,themorefriendless,themoreunsustainedIam,themoreIwillrespectmyself.IwillkeepthelawgivenbyGod;sanctionedbyman.’”13Indomitableisanotherofthosewordsthatdeservesacloserlook.Itmeans“incapableofbeingovercome,subdued,orvan-quished.”14Here,ofcourse,thesenseofitisthateventhegreatestpassion,thedeepesthumanlongingcannotovercomeJaneinthefaceoftruth,ofwhatsheknowstoberight.
Finally,inoneofthemorepowerfultheologicalstatementsJaneEyremakes,sheteachesherreadersthefoundationofhowoneistolivewhenshesayswithdesperatedetermination,“IwillholdtotheprinciplesreceivedbymewhenIwassane,andnotmad—asIamnow.Lawsandprinciplesarenotforthetimeswhenthereisnotemptation....Theyhaveaworth—soIhavealwaysbelieved;andifIcannotbelieveitnow,itisbecauseIaminsane—quiteinsane:withmyveinsrunningfire,andmyheartbeatingfasterthanIcancountitsthrobs.”15Torephrase,God’slawsareeasilykeptwhenone
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isnotenduringtemptation.Howcommittedwearetowhatwesaywebelieveistestedwhenweare“insane,”literallyoutofourmindswithtemptation,whenitishardtoremembertruth.
dIgnITY and MeMORY
ApproximatelytwohundredusesofthewordrememberappearintheOldandNewTestaments,manyofthemreminderstorecallthehistoricaleventsthroughwhichthepatriarchspassedsothattheirdescendantsmightbegivenfaith.ReadersareurgedtorememberhowGodledHischildrenandtheirenslavementanddeliverance,toconsiderthegenerationslongago.Theyareevenurgedtoasktheirfathersforthathistory.ReadersarecalledupontoextolGod’swordsandwonders,toremembertheancientlawsandfindcomfortinthem.ThefailuretoremembermarkssomeofthegreatdefeatsofthechildrenofIsrael.SometimesmymotherusedtosaytomeasIwentoutwithmyfriends,“Rememberwhoyouareandwhomyoubelongto.”Dignitydemandsthatwerememberthatwearedaugh-tersofGod,thatwebelongtoHimatalltimes,butparticularlywhenasJanesays,weare“insane.”
If your faith matters, your mind matters.
WhathelpsJaneintemptationandlossisbothherabilitytothinkcriticallyinamomentofpassionandhertheology—herobjectivebeliefinaGodoftruth,herinsistenceuponremember-ingtruth.Sheunderstandsthatshemustbehavewithrighteous-nessanddignityinspiteofwhatshefeels.Shemustliveaboveheremotionsaspowerfulastheymaybe;shemustnotrationalizeher
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choices,choiceswhichmakeallthedifferenceinherlife,thediffer-encebetweenwastingtimeinsinandtrustingGodforherhappi-ness.And,itmakesheramodeltoothers,proofthatonecanlivewiselyandwell.
Ifyourfaithmatters,yourmindmatters.Ifyourmindmatters,itisimportantwhatyoudowithit,theologicallyandintellectually.Youcannotseparateyourspirituallifefromthelifeofthemind.Youcan’tbefullyhumanwithoutusingwiselyallthefacultiesGodhasgivenyou.Theyareintertwined;onewillnotthrivewithouttheother.Inneglectingoneortheother,youwillliveasmall,shriveledexistence.Janemakestherightdecisionsbecauseherintellectualreasoningabilityandtheologicalunderstandingaresound,protect-ingherfrommoralfailure.
Theculturehasencouragedsomuchself-focusandindulgencethatsometimesIwonderifwehaven’ttoldourselveswecan’tbeheroinesintheold-timetradition.Beingaheroinemeansbeingcounterculturalwherecultureorsubcultureiswrongheaded.Every-wherewelook,peoplearetellingstoriesofrecoveryfromsin;and,ofcourse,God’sgraceismarvelousbeyondwords.However,itispossibletochoosewell,tospendlesstimerecoveringandmoretimedeepeningourwalkwithGod.
InJ.R.R.Tolkien’sThe Hobbit,themagicianGandalftellsthere-luctantandunlikelyheroBilboBaggins,“Thereismoretoyouthanyouknow,”16moreinthisinstancethandoingwhathehasalwaysdone.ThewisemagicianknowsthatBilbohasbecomeaddictedtothatcozyhobbithole;helikeseatinganddrinkingwell,helikesbeingcomfortable.ButGandalfknowsthatBilbohastwosidestohisnature,that“withinthehobbit’sveinscoursedbloodnotonlyfromthesedentaryBagginssideofthefamilybutalsofromthe
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Minding Your dignity
swashbucklingTookside.”17Bilbohasgottenusedtothesedentaryside,andafterall,he’snotdoinganythingwrong;he’sjustanice,evengenerous,placidhobbitwhoknowshowtohaveagoodtime,whofitsintohiscommunity.But,somethingtranscendentiscallingtoBilbo—tellinghimthereismoretolifethanthis,thatthereareadventurestobehadonaheroicscale,thatthereisgoodandevilinthisworld,andhehastobepartoffightingthewrongs.Bilbohasachoiceatthispoint,tocontinuetoobservethestatusquoortohaveanadventurewhichwillmakehimahero.Itisadifferencebetweenthestatusquoasspiritualdeath,andthetranscendentadventurewhichislife.It’sachoiceeachoneofyouisbeingcalledtomake.
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UnsedUced Unshakenand
dIscUssIOn QUesTIOns
1. Whatisyourconceptofdignity?Howhasitchangedafterread-ingthischapter?
2. Whodoyoufinddignifiedandwhy?Bespecific.
3. HowdoyouseedignityasacomponentofChristianity?
4. Formabookclubandreadoneorbothofthenovelsmentionedinthischapterwithaviewtoformingaphilosophyofdignifiedwomanhood.
sUggesTed ReadIng
• FICTION:Jane EyrebyCharlotteBrontëorPride and PrejudicebyJaneAusten.Chooseunabridgededitions.
• NONFICTION:Biographies/autobiographiesofwomeninmis-sionarywork;womeninChristianity.(SeeBiographical Diction-ary of Christian Missions,editedbyGeraldH.Anderson.)
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