Raising Strong and Successful Children

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Raising Strong and Successful Children Ken Ginsburg MD, MS Ed The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia The University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine

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Raising Strong and Successful Children. Ken Ginsburg MD, MS Ed The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia The University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine. What should childhood look like?. And . . . who is childhood for???. How do we define success?. Resilience. - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

Transcript of Raising Strong and Successful Children

Page 1: Raising Strong and Successful Children

Raising Strong and Successful Children

Ken Ginsburg MD, MS Ed

The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia

The University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine

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What should childhood look like?

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And . . . who is childhood for???

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How do we define success?

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Resilience

• The Ability To Overcome Adversity

• The Capacity to Bounce Back

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Resilience

is

NOT

Invulnerability

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Resilience

is

NOT

a character trait.

It is affected by supports and circumstances!!!

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The Bottom Line

• Young People will be more resilient if the

important adults in their lives believe in

them unconditionally and hold them to

high expectations

• Young People live up or down to the

expectations we set for them

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The 7 C’s of Resilience

Confidence

Competence

Connection

Character

Contribution

Coping

Control

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The importance of

Connection can not be overstated. . .

• Family

• School

• Community

• . . . and sometimes, the health clinician

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Connection 101:

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Why does it feel like our connection is challenged

during adolescence?

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Listening

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Sometimes it feels like this…

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But know that they do hear you…

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Connection 101 (cont’d):

Perfectionism Prevention

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What is perfectionism?

And . . . why isn’t it a good thing?

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“Just try your best”

Victims of a toxic society What do we praise . . . or notice? Desire to spare us Fear of becoming the target of

anger

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Finding Competence . . . . . . Building Confidence

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Learning Not to Undermine Competence

• Listening

• Letting young people make their own mistakes

• Praising the process of trying, rather than just the results

• And not over-praising . . .this is not self esteem!

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• Talking in a way young people understand

• Recognizing the cognitive development of adolescence

• No more lectures!!!!!!

• The “Cognitive AHA” experience

Learning Not to Undermine Competence

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Control - Discipline

Parenting Style

What goes wrong

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Resilience

• Is about learning to cope, in a positive way with life’s inevitable stressors

• We might do our greatest good by raising youth with a wide repertoire of positive coping strategies

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You Feel Awful!!!

Positive Coping

Strategies

Stress Discomfort

Negative Coping

Strategies

Relief

You Feel Awful!!!DiscomfortYou Feel Awful!!!Discomfort

Relief

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Coping

Engagement vs. Disengagement

Emotion Focused vs. Problem Focused

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Stress Management : Tackling The Problem

1) Making the problem manageable

2) Active Avoidance

3) Let Some things go

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Serenity Prayer

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the

difference

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Stress Management : Taking Care of My Body

4)Exercise

o Fear

o Anger

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Stress Management : Taking Care of My Body

5)Relaxation

6)Nutrition

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Stress Management : Taking Care of My Body

7) Sleep

o Stimulation

o Cool Down

Exercise

Shower

o Release emotion

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Stress Management : Managing Emotions

8) Instant Vacations

9) Releasing Emotions

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Stress Management Plan : Making the World Better

10) Contributing to the world

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An Interactive Stress Management Plan

www.aap.org/stress