Matilda Script

8/19/2019 Matilda Script

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MATILDA SCRIPT

ORIGINAL BROADWAY CAST – Act 1[Note: Especially among the ensemble, the person speaking each line (e.g., BIG KIDS) may change rom sho!to sho!. ]

MATILDASophia Gennusa, Oona Laurence, Bailey Ryon, MillyShapiro

MISS TRUNCHBULLBertie Carvel

MISS HONEYLauren Ward

MR WORMWOODGabriel Ebert

MRS WORMWOODLesli Margherita

MRS PHELPSKaren ldridge

MICHAEL!aylor !rensch

RUDOLPHO"hillip Spaeth

ESCAPOLOGISTBen !ho#pson

ACROBATSa#antha Stur#

DOCTOR $ohn rthur Greene

PARTY ENTERTAINER $ohn Sanders

NURSE!a#i%a Son&a La'rence

ACROBAT'S SISTER Bertie Carvel

BRUCE$ac% Broderic%

LAVENDER (renie coba

AMANDABeatrice !ulchin

NIGEL$ared "ar%er

ERIC!ed Wilson

ALICEva )eMary

HORTENSIAE##a *o'ard

TOMMY$udah Bella#y

CHILDREN SWINGSErica Si#one Barnett, Madilyn$a+ Morro',Lu%e Kolbe Manni%us, Sa'yer

unes

ADULT ENSEMBLE and SWINGSRyan Steele, !hayne $asperson, !a#i%a Son&a La'rence, adine-sengger, $ohn rthur Greene,Colin -srael, Clay !ho#son, Celia Mei Rubin,Betsy Stru.ness, *eather !epe, /urel Eche+arreta, Sa#antha

Stur#, Ben !ho#pson

BIG KID [BEN]Ben !ho#pson 0variable1

BIG KID [RYAN]Ryan Steele 0variable1

BIG KID [TAMIKA]!a#i%a Son&a La'rence 0variable1

BIG KID [TAYLOR]!aylor !rensch 0variable1

______________________________________________________________________________________

MATILDA THE MUSICAL ACT 1

A bell rings. Lights up. A long table with the word "Birthday" emblazoned on it



moves forward, with little hands creeping along the bottom. The table stops andthe hands hit the ground.

The children begin to pop up from behind the table and speak. They are all dressedin costume !ric as Batman, Tommy as the ncredible #ulk, Lavender as a $rincess,

%igel as &piderman, Bruce in army gear, Amanda as &uperwoman, Alice as 'onder'oman, #ortensia as a (ueen.

ERICMy mummy says I'm a miracle!

TOMMYMy daddy says I'm his special little guy!

Ow!

AMANDAI am a princess!

BRUCE And I am a prince.

ALL GIRLSMum says I'm an angel sent down from the sky!

ERIC, TOMMY, and BRUCEMy daddy says I'm his special little soldier.

No one is as handsome, strong as me.

BRUCEIt's true he indulges my tendency to bulge.

ERIC, TOMMY, and BRUCEBut I'm his little soldier.

Hup, two, four, free

ALICE and HORTENSIAMy mummy says I'm a miracle,

ne look at my face and it's plain to see."er since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord,

It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me.Ow!

NIGEL, TOMMYMy daddy says I'm his special little soldier.

No one is as bold or tough as me.#as my daddy told yane day when I'm older,

I can be a soldier

NIGELAnd "oot #ou $n t"e fa%e!

A party entertainer enters with balloons.

&ARTY ENTERTAINERne can hardly mo"e for beauty and brilliance these days.

It seems that there are millions of these $one in a millions$ these days.%pecialness is de rigueur .

Abo"e a"erage is a"erage. &o fig ueur!Is it some modern miracle of calculus

(hat such fre)uent miracles don't render each one un miraculous*

CHILDRENMy mummy says I'm a miracle.


It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me.

LA'ENDERMy mummy says I'm a precious barrelina.

%he has ne"er seen + a!rettier barrelin+a!

%he says if I'm keen, I ha"e to cut down on the cream,



But I'm a barrelina +So ($)e *e *ore %a+e!

)our *+ $L!&, crouched down behind the table, begin to stand and speak.

COU&LE MAN- (ake another picture of our angel from this angle o"er here.

MAN- %he is clearly more emotionally de"eloped than her peers.B (#- hat a dear!

COU&LE - MAN- (hat's right, honey. /ook at mummy.

MAN- 0on't put honey on your brother. MAN- %mile for mummy! %mile for mother!

MAN- I think he blinked. MAN- ell, take another!

COU&LE .MAN- #a"e you seen his school report* #e got a 1 on his report!

ALL COU&LES/ 0"at1MAN- e'll ha"e to change his school. (he teacher's clearly falling short.

COU&LE 2

MAN- %he's 2ust delightful.MAN- %o hilarious. MAN- And insightful.

COU&LESMight she be a little brighter than her class*

h, yes, she's definitely ad"anced!

The couples and the children overlap the ne-t two verses, as children splitthemselves among five couples and e-ecute rote choreography.

3COU&LES(ake another picture of our angel from this angle o"er here.%he is clearly more emotionally de"eloped than her peers.

hat a dear!

(hat's right, honey, look at mummy.0on't put honey on your brother.%mile for mummy, smile for mother.

I think he blinked. ell, take another!



It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. 4

CHILDRENMy mummy says I'm a +

CHILDREN and COU&LESMiracle!

CHILDREN(hat I'm as tiny and as shiny as a +

CHILDREN and COU&LESMirror ball!

1#I/03 N 4ou can be all cynical,

But it's a truth empirical.(here's ne"er been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle

As me.

A curtain is wheeled in with the words " /!A0& A1+" painted on it. t is flankedby A2A%3A and !0 * in lab coats over their costumes. 20& '+02'++3 is behind the

curtain. A 3+*T+0 enters.



MRS 0ORM0OODLoo+, $ t"$ (onna ta+e *u%" 5on(er, do%tor1 I6)e (ot a p5ane to %at%" at t"ree

I6* %o*pet$n( $n t"e B$7Annua5 Internat$ona5 A*ateur Sa5 a and Ba55roo* Dan%$n(C"a*p$on "$p $n &ar$

DOCTORYou6re (ett$n( on a p5ane, Mr 0or*wood1

MRS 0ORM0OODOf %our e I a* I a5wa# %o*pete, do%tor But t"$ t$*e, I6)e (ot a e%ret weapon

Rudo5p"o! He6 part Ita5$an, #ou +now 'er# upp5e Ha $n%red$85e upper78od#tren(t"

DOCTORI t"$n+ we "ou5d "a)e a ta5+

20& '+02'++3 walks out from behind the curtain, heavily pregnant.

MRS 0ORM0OODSo, w"at $ $t1 0"at6 wron( w$t" *e1

DOCTORMr 0or*wood, do #ou rea55# "a)e no $dea1

MRS 0ORM0OODGa 1

DOCTORMr 0or*wood, I want #ou to t"$n+ )er# %arefu55# 0"at do #ou t"$n+ *$("t 8e t"e

%au e of 9 t"$ 1

20& '+02'++3 gasps.

MRS 0ORM0OODA* I A* I Loo+, a* I fat1

DOCTORYou6re pre(nant!

MRS 0ORM0OOD

0"at1!DOCTOR

You6re (o$n( to "a)e a 8a8#

MRS 0ORM0OODBut I6)e (ot a 8a8#! I don6t want anot"er one I n6t t"ere o*et"$n( #ou %an do1

DOCTORYou6re n$ne *ont" pre(nant!

MRS 0ORM0OODAnt$8$ot$% , or O", *# (ood Lord! 0"at a8out t"e B$7Annua5 Internat$ona5

A*ateur Sa5 a and Ba55roo* Dan%$n( C"a*p$on "$p 1

DOCTORA 8a8#, Mr 0or*wood A %"$5d T"e *o t pre%$ou ($ft t"e natura5 wor5d %an 8e tow

upon u "a 8een "anded to #ou A 8rand new "u*an 8e$n(! A 5$fe A per on Awonderfu5 new per on $ a8out to %o*e $nto #our 5$fe to 8r$n( 5o)e, and *a($%, and

"app$ne , and wonder!

MRS 0ORM0OODO", 85ood# "e55!

20& '+02'++3 walks back behind the curtain.

DOCTOR"ery life I bring into this world

3estores my faith in human kind.

NURSE

&u ", Mr 0or*wood, pu "!MRS 0ORM0OOD

I655 pu " #ou $n a *$nute!



DOCTORach newborn life a can"as yet unpainted,

(his still, unbroken skin,(his uncorrupted mind.

The *# L30!% enter from both sides of the stage, with lab coats over theircostumes. The 3+*T+0 and the *# L30!% sing into their stethoscopes.

DOCTOR and CHILDREN" er y life is unbelie"ably unlikely.

(he chances of e5istence almost infinitely small.

DOCTOR(he most common thing in life is life . . .

The curtain is wheeled away to reveal 20& '+02'++3. A % 0&! is holding a baby,which cries.

DOCTOR And yet e"ery single life,

"ery new lifeIs a miracle!

Miracle!

20 '+02'++3 enters, puffing on a cigarette.MR 0ORM0OOD

0"ere $ "e1 0"ere6 *# on1

DOCTORMr 0or*wood! Are #ou *o+$n( a %$(arette1

MR 0ORM0OOD0"at1 O", of %our e 3 #e throws the cigarette into the audience. 4 I6* orr#,

do%tor 0"at a* I t"$n+$n(1 T"$ %a55 for a proper *o+e 3 #e takes out a cigarand takes hold of the baby. 4 O", *# word, "e6 an u(5# 5$tt5e t"$n(

DOCTORT"$ $ one of t"e *o t 8eaut$fu5 %"$5dren I6)e e)er een

20 '+02'++3 unwraps the blanket that the baby is swathed in.

MR 0ORM0OODO", *# (ood Lord 0"ere6 "$ f$n($e1

DOCTORH$ w"at1

MR 0ORM0OODH$ f$n($e H$ w"at%"a*a%a55$t H$ do7da" 0"at6)e #ou done w$t" "$ f$n($e1

DOCTORT"$ %"$5d doe n6t "a)e a :t"$n($e: 9

MR 0ORM0OOD0"at1 A 8o# w$t" no f$n($e1 Loo+ w"at #ou6)e done, #ou tup$d wo*an T"$ 8o#6

(ot no f$n($e

DOCTORMr 0or*wood! T"$ %"$5d $ a ($r5 A 8eaut$fu5, 8eaut$fu5 5$tt5e ($r5

MRS 0ORM0OODI t"ere t$55 t$*e for t"e B$7Annua5 Inter7C"a*p$on "$p A*ateur Sau a(e 9

MR 0ORM0OODDan%e %o*pet$t$on6 o)er You *$ ed $t 3 #e brings out a load of cash and startsleafing through it. 4 Loo+, I don6t uppo e we %ou5d e;%"an(e $t for a 8o#, %ou5d

we1

The 3+*T+0 e-its and 20 '+02'++3 hurries after him.

MRS 0ORM0OODT"$ $ t"e wor t da# of *# 5$fe!

h, my undercarriage doesn't feel )uite normal.



My skin looks 2ust re"olting in this foul, fluorescent light. And this gown is nothing like the semi formal,

%emi %panish gownI should be wearing in the semi finals tonight!

0 3+L$#+ enters from behind a gap in the curtain behind her. #e dances with thehospital bed that 20& '+02'++3 is lying on.

MRS 0ORM0OODI should be dancing the (arentella

6ui mon fella Italiano.

0 3+L$#+ e-its the same way he came.

MRS 0ORM0OODNot dressed in hospital cotton,

ith an owchie . . . front bottom. And this +

The 3+*T+0, 20 '+02'++3, and a male nurse enter.

DOCTORMiracle!

MRS 0ORM0OOD#orrible +

DOCTORMiracle!

MRS 0ORM0OOD%melly little +

DOCTOR(he most beautiful miracle I ha"e e"er seen!

MR 0ORM0OODI can't find his frank 'n' beans!

$arents wheeling strollers enter alongside their *# L30!%.

DOCTOR" er y life is unbelie"ably unlikely.


DOCTOR(he chances of e5istence almost infinitely small.

CHILDRENMy daddy says I'm his special little guy.

DOCTOR(he most common thing in life is life +

CHILDRENHup, two, four, free!

The Birthday table is wheeled back in by other children. *# L30!% and *+ $L!&arrange themselves behind it.

DOCTOR And yet, e"ery single life,

"ery new lifeIs a miracle!

Miracle!Miracle!

The 3+*T+0 runs behind the table with the others. The group sets off party poppersdown the line.

COU&LES, CHILDREN, and DOCTORMy mummy says I'm a miracle,

ne look at my face and it's plain to see.



"er since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord,It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me.

My mummy says I'm a miracle.(hat I'm as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball.

4ou can be all cynical,But it's a truth empirical

(here's ne"er been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as . . .

The woman from *+ $L! 4 blows on a birthday cake as the table splits in two and2AT L3A stands from behind it, holding a collection of books from one hand.

MATILDAMy mummy says I'm a lousy little worm.

My daddy says I'm a bore.My mummy says I'm a 2umped up little germ,(hat kids like me should be against the law.

My daddy says I should learn to shut my pie hole.No one like a smart mouthed girl like me.

Mum says I'm a good case for population control.0ad says I should watch more (7.

20 '+02'++3 kicks her out of the way, talking on the telephone. The scene switchesto the 'ormwood5s living room. 2AT L3A5s brother, 2 *#A!L, lies lazily on a

recliner. 2AT L3A sits to the side, reading a book.

MR 0ORM0OODGet out of $t! Ye , $r T"at6 r$("t, $r One "undred and f$ft#7f$)e 8rand new5u;ur# %ar , $r Are t"e# (ood runner 1 O", 5et6 put $t t"$ wa# You wou5dn6t

8eat t"e* $n a ra%e! 3 #e laughs then peters out. 4 No, $r Ye , $r T"e# are (oodrunner , $r Ye , $r Indeed, $r So, er* How *u%", e;a%t5# are we

ta5+$n( a8out1

20& '+02'++3 enters and screams.

MRS 0ORM0OODHarr#!

MR 0ORM0OOD3 to the phone 4 Han( on

MRS 0ORM0OODLoo+ at t"$ S"e6 read$n( a 8oo+ T"at6 not nor*a5 for a f$)e7#ear7o5d I t"$n+

"e *$("t 8e an $d$ot

MATILDAL$ ten to t"$ / :It wa t"e 8e t of t$*e It wa t"e wor t of t$*e It wa t"e

a(e of w$ do* :

20& '+02'++3 screams again.

MR 0ORM0OODStop %ar$n( #our *ot"er w$t" t"at 8oo+, 8o#

MATILDAI6* a ($r5!

MRS 0ORM0OODAnd "e +eep tr#$n( to te55 *e tor$e , Harr# Stor$e 0"o want tor$e 1 I

*ean, $t6 <u t not nor*a5 for a ($r5 to 8e a55 :t"$n+$n(:

MR 0ORM0OOD3 to the phone 4 I6* (onna %a55 #ou tra$("t 8a%+ 3 to 20& '+02'++3 4 0ou5d #ou

p5ea e "ut up1 I a* tr#$n( to pu55 off t"e 8$((e t 8u $ne dea5 of *# 5$fe and I"a)e to 5$ ten to t"$ It6 #our fau5t You pend u $nto trou85e and #ou e;pe%t

*e to (et u out 0"at a* I1 A f5a*$n( e %apo5o($ t1

MRS 0ORM0OOD:E %apo5o($ t:, "e a# ! 0"at a8out *e, t"en1 I6)e (ot a w"o5e "ou e to 5oo+

after! D$nner don6t *$%rowa)e t"e* e5)e , #ou +now! If #ou6re an e %apo5o($ t, I*u t 8e an a%ro8at to 8a5an%e t"at 5ot T"e wor5d6 (reate t a%ro8at! I a* off to85ea%" *# root and I "an6t 8e ta5+$n( to #ou for t"e re t of t"e e)en$n(,

#ou "orr$d 5$tt5e *an!



MR 0ORM0OODBut I6* (onna *a+e u r$%"!

MRS 0ORM0OODR$%"1 How r$%"1

MR 0ORM0OODO", )er# r$%" Ru $an 8u $ne *en/ )er#, )er# tup$d! Your (en$u "u 8and $

(o$n( to e55 t"e* one "undred and f$ft# f$)e +na%+ered o5d 8an(er a 8rand7new5u;ur# %ar

MATILDABut t"at6 not fa$r! T"e %ar w$55 8rea+ down 0"at a8out t"e Ru $an 1

MR 0ORM0OOD:=a$r : L$ ten to t"e 8o#

MATILDAI6* a ($r5!

MR 0ORM0OOD:=a$r: doe not (et #ou an#w"ere, #ou t"$%+"eaded tw$t78ra$n! A55 I %an a# $ ,

t"an+ "ea)en M$%"ae5 "a $n"er$ted "$ o5d *an6 8ra$n , e", on1

MICHAEL3dully 4 M$%"ae5

MRS 0ORM0OODH** 0e55, I "a55 ta+e #our *one# w"en #ou earn $t, and I "a55 pend $t But I

"an6t en<o# $t, 8e%au e of t"e de p$%a85e wa# $n w"$%" #ou "a)e po+en to *eton$("t

20& '+02'++3 e-its.

MR 0ORM0OOD3 to 2AT L3A 4 T"$ $ #our fau5t 0$t" #our tup$d 8oo+ and #our tup$d read$n(

MATILDA0"at1 But I d$dn6t do an#t"$n( T"at6 not r$("t

MR 0ORM0OOD:R$("t:1 3 #e laughs. 4 :R$("t:1 I655 te55 #ou o*et"$n( You6re off to %"oo5 $n afew da# 6 t$*e And #ou won6t 8e (ett$n( :r$("t: t"ere, o" no See, I +now #our

"ead*$ tre A(at"a Trun%"8u55

Behind 20 '+02'++3 and 2AT L3A, the scene changes from a living room to 2AT L3A5sbedroom.

MR 0ORM0OODAnd I6)e to5d "er a55 a8out #ou and #our *art#7pant $dea Great, 8$(, tron(,%ar# wo*an "e $ U ed to %o*pete $n t"e O5#*p$% , t"row$n( t"e "a**er! I*a($ne

w"at "e $ (o$n( to do to a "orr$85e, >uea+# 5$tt5e (o85$n 5$+e #ou, 8o#

MATILDAI6* a ($r5!

MR 0ORM0OODNow, (et off to 8ed, #ou 5$tt5e 8oo+wor*

20 '+02'++3 e-its while 2AT L3A runs into her bedroom, flings the door open, andclimbs onto her bookshelf. &he opens a book.

MATILDA8ack and 8ill went up the hill

(o fetch a pail of water.%o they say.

(he subse)uent fall was ine"itable.(hey ne"er stood a chance.(hey were written that way-

Innocent "ictims of their story.

/ike 3omeo and 8uliet,'(was written in the stars before they e"en met.

(hat lo"e and fate and a touch of stupidity



ould rob them of their hope of li"ing happily.(he endings are often a little bit gory!

I wonder why they didn't 2ust change their story. e're told we ha"e to do what we're told, but surely,

%ometimes you ha"e to be a little bit naughty!

8ust because you find that life's not fair, it0oesn't mean that you 2ust ha"e to grin and bear it.

If you always take it on the chin and wear it,Nothing will change."en if you're little, you can do a lot. 4ou

Mustn't let a little thing like $little$ stop you.If you sit around and let them get on top, you

Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, And that's not right.

3 &he flicks on the light of the vanity in her parent5s bathroom, which has risenfrom the stage. t is delineated into "#is" and "#ers" sides. 4

And if it's not right, 4ou ha"e to put it right.

2AT L3A picks up various bottles from the vanity and reads from their labels.

&5at$nu* 85onde "a$r d#e E;tra tron( ?eep out of rea%" of %"$5dren H**O$5 of '$o5et "a$r ton$% =or *en Yep!

2AT L3A starts pouring the hair dye into the +il of 6iolets bottle.

MATILDAIn the slip of a bolt, there's a tiny re"olt.

(he seed of a war in the creak of a floorboard. A storm can begin with the flap of a wing.(he tiniest mite packs the mightiest sting.

"ery day starts with the tick of a clock. All escapes start with the click of a lock.

If you're stuck in your story and want to get out, 4ou don't ha"e to cry, you don't ha"e to shout +

'1ause if you're little, you can do a lot. 4ouMustn't let a little thing like $little$ stop you.If you sit around and let them get on top, you

on't change a thing.8ust because you find that life's not fair, it

0oesn't mean that you 2ust ha"e to grin and bear it.If you always take it on the chin and wear it,

4ou might as well be saying you think that it's okay, And that's not right. And if it's not right,

4ou ha"e to put it right . . .3 &he re7enters her bedroom and 8umps onto the bed. 4

But nobody else is gonna put it right for me.Nobody but me is gonna change my story.

%ometimes you ha"e to be a little bit naughty!2atilda lies down and flicks off the light. The vanity rises again, signifying

morning. 20 '+02'++3, towel wrapped about his shoulder, enters the bathroom with2 *#A!L.

MR 0ORM0OODIn 8u $ne , on, a *an6 "a$r $ "$ (reate t a et Good "a$r *ean a (ood

8ra$n Now, t"e e%ret to *# u%%e $n 8u $ne $ 9

MICHAELSe%ret

MR 0ORM0OODYe Ye Se%ret T"e e%ret to *# u%%e $ t"$ O$5 of '$o5et "a$r ton$% for

*en Stand 8a%+, on! Your o5d *an $ (o$n( to wor+ 3 #e pulls the towel over hishead and starts massaging vigorously 4 O", #ea" O", t"at6 w"ere $t6 at! O",

r$("t T"at6 t"e 8anana r$("t t"ere 3 #e rips the towel off to reveal that hishair is green. 4 Let *e te55 #ou o*et"$n(, on A *an $n 8u $ne $*p5# %annot



fa$5 to (et not$%ed w"en "e 5oo+ 5$+e t"$

MICHAELSe%ret !

20& '+02'++3 enters and screams.

MRS 0ORM0OODYour "a$r! It6 (reen!

MR 0ORM0OODGood Lord, wo*an, "a)e #ou tarted a5read#1 It6 not e)en e$("t t"$rt#!

2AT L3A enters from her bedroom. 20 '+02'++3 takes a mirror that 20& '+02'++3brandishes.

MR 0ORM0OODO"! M# "a$r $ (reen!

MRS 0ORM0OOD0"at on eart" d$d #ou do t"at for1 0"# wou5d #ou want (reen "a$r1

MR 0ORM0OODI don6t want (reen "a$r I d$dn6t do an#t"$n(!

MATILDAMa#8e #ou u ed o*e of *u**#6 pero;$de 8# *$ ta+e

MRS 0ORM0OODT"at6 e;a%t5# w"at #ou6)e done O", #ou tup$d *an

MR 0ORM0OODO", *# "a$r! O", *# 5o)e5# "a$r! O", *# (ood Lord I6)e (ot *# dea5 toda# w$t" t"e

Ru $an 0"at a* I (onna do1

MATILDAI +now I +now w"at #ou %an do

MR 0ORM0OOD0"at1 0"at $ $t1 0"at %an I do1

MATILDAYou %an pretend #ou6re an e5f!

MR 0ORM0OODYe ! T"at6 $t! I %an pretend I6* an 0"at are #ou ta5+$n( a8out1 You foo5!

T"e 8o#6 a 5oone#

20 '+02'++3 and 2 *#A!L e-it. 20& '+02'++3 brushes past 2AT L3A with a sound ofutter disgust.

MATILDAMu*, wou5d #ou 5$+e to "ear a tor#1

MRS 0ORM0OODDon6t 8e d$ (u t$n(! Go on Creep on 8a%+ to t"at 5$8rar# of #our or o*et"$n(

T"e ooner #ou6re 5o%+ed up $n t"at %"oo5, t"e 8etter20& '+02'++3 e-its. 2AT L3A collects her books. The scene changes to the library.

2 && #+%!/ is browsing the stacks. 20& $#!L$& enters.

MRS &HEL&SMat$5da! 0"at a p5ea ure to ee #ou Here $n t"e 5$8rar# a(a$n, are we1

MATILDAYe I *ean, *# *u* wanted *e to ta# at "o*e w$t" "er S"e "ate $t w"en I (o

out S"e *$ e *e o *u%" Dad too He 5o)e "a)$n( *e around But I t"$n+ $t6(ood for (rown7up to "a)e t"e$r own pa%e

MRS &HEL&SYour parent *u t 8e o proud to "a)e a ($r5 a %5e)er a #ou And do #ou te55

t"e* 5ot of tor$e 5$+e #ou do w$t" *e1 I 5o)e #our tor$e , Mat$5da! And t"at6not a "$nt, 8# t"e wa# But $f #ou d$d "appen to "a)e a tor# #ou wanted to te55 9

MISS HONEYGood78#e, Mr &"e5p See #ou ne;t wee+



MRS &HEL&SGood78#e, M$ Hone# And (ood 5u%+ w$t" t"e To5 to#

2 && #+%!/ laughs and e-its down the stairs at the front of the stage.

MRS &HEL&SA I wa a#$n(, Mat$5da I6* not "$nt$n(, 8ut $f #ou d$d "appen to "a)e a tor#

#ou wanted 9

MATILDA0"o wa t"at1

MRS &HEL&ST"at 5ad#1 T"at wa M$ Hone# S"e6 (o$n( to 8e #our tea%"er

MATILDAT"at 5ad#1 T"at 5ad# $ *# 9

MRS &HEL&SYe , #our tea%"er Now, 5oo+ Are #ou (o$n( to te55 *e a tor# or not1

MATILDAOn%e upon a t$*e 9

20& $#!L$& screams and e-its. &he re7enters carrying two s(uare blocks, one larger

than the other. &he puts down the large block and 2AT L3A stands on it. 20& $#!L$&retreats to the smaller block and sits down.

MATILDAOn%e upon a t$*e, t"e two (reate t %$r%u perfor*er $n t"e wor5d 9 an

e %apo5o($ t w"o %ou5d e %ape fro* an# 5o%+ t"at wa e)er $n)ented, and an a%ro8atw"o wa o +$55ed $t ee*ed a $f "e %ou5d a%tua55# f5# 9 fe55 $n 5o)e, and (ot

*arr$ed T"e# perfor*ed o*e of t"e *o t $n%red$85e feat to(et"er an#one "a e)ereen And peop5e wou5d %o*e fro* *$5e around/ +$n( ! >ueen ! %e5e8r$t$e ! and

a tronaut ! But not <u t to ee t"e$r +$55, 8ut a5 o to ee t"e$r 5o)e for ea%"ot"er, w"$%" wa o deep t"at $t wa a$d t"at %at wou5d purr a t"e# pa ed

t"e*, and do( wou5d weep w$t" <o#

A model of a grand old house rolls in from the back of the stage.

MATILDAT"e *o)ed $nto a 8eaut$fu5 o5d "ou e at t"e ed(e of town, and $n t"e e)en$n( ,

t"e# wou5d wa5+ and ta+e t"e a$r And ea%" n$("t, t"e %"$5dren of t"e town wou5dwa$t $n ant$%$pat$on, "op$n( for a (5$*p e of t"e "$n# w"$te %arf t"at t"ea%ro8at a5wa# wore, for t"en t"e# +new t"at t"e# "ad on5# to %r#, :Tr$%+ !

Tr$%+ !: and t"e (reat perfor*er wou5d $n tant5# o85$(e w$t" t"e *o tpe%ta%u5ar "ow, <u t for t"e*

But a5t"ou(" t"e# 5o)ed ea%" ot"er, a5t"ou(" t"e# were fa*ou and e)er#one 5o)edt"e*, t"e# were ad

2AT L3A collects two dolls from the house. &he uses them to carry on aconversation.

ACROBAT 3 off7stage 40e "a)e e)er#t"$n(

MATILDA:0e "a)e e)er#t"$n( t"at t"e wor5d "a to offer,: a$d t"e w$fe

ESCA&OLOGIST 3 off7stage 40e "a)e e)er#t"$n(

MATILDA:But we do not "a)e t"e one t"$n( $n t"e wor5d we want *o t :

ACROBAT and ESCA&OLOGIST 3 off7stage 4But t"e one t"$n(

MATILDA

:0e do not "a)e a %"$5d :ESCA&OLOGIST 3 off7stage 4

&at$en%e, *# 5o)e



MATILDA:&at$en%e, *# 5o)e,: t"e "u 8and rep5$ed :T$*e $ on our $de E)en t$*e 5o)e

u :

MRS &HEL&SO", Mat$5da!

MATILDABut t$*e $ t"e one t"$n( no one $ *a ter of And a t$*e pa ed, t"e# (rew >u$teo5d, and t$55 t"e# "ad no %"$5d At n$("t, t"e# 5$ tened to t"e $5en%e of t"e$r

8$(, e*pt# "ou e, and t"e# wou5d $*a($ne "ow 8eaut$fu5 $t wou5d 8e $f $t waf$55ed w$t" t"e ound of a %"$5d p5a#$n(

MRS &HEL&SO", Mat$5da, t"$ $ )er# ad!

MATILDADo #ou want *e to top1

MRS &HEL&SDon6t #ou dare!

MATILDAT"e$r adne o)erw"e5*ed t"e*, and drew t"e* $nto e)er *ore dan(erou feat , a

t"e$r wor+ 8e%a*e t"e on5# p5a%e t"e# %ou5d e %ape the inescapable tragedy oftheir lives ! And o $t wa , t"e# de%$ded to perfor* t"e *o t dan(erou feat e)er

+nown to *an! :It $ %a55ed,: a$d t"e "u 8and, announ%$n( t"e e)ent to t"ewor5d6 pre , w"o "ad (at"ered to 5$ ten w$t" 8ated 8reat" 9 3 The voice of the!&*A$+L+1 &T echoes her words. 4 9 :6T"e Burn$n( 0o*an, Hur5$n( T"rou(" t"e A$r,

w$t" D#na*$te $n Her Ha$r, o)er S"ar+ and Sp$+# O8<e%t , Cau("t B# t"e Man Lo%+ed$n a Ca(e6, and $t $ t"e *o t dan(erou feat e)er +nown to *an!

A crowd cheers.

MATILDA and ACROBAT 3 off stage 4:It $ our de t$n# 9 :

MATILDA – a$d t"e w$fe, *$5$n( ad5# and 5$pp$n( "er "and $nto "$

MATILDA and ACROBAT 3 off stage 4:It $ w"ere t"e 5one5$ne of 5$fe "a 5ed u :

2AT L3A pauses for several moments, holding the dolls in front of hercontemplatively.

MRS &HEL&S0e55, w"at "appen 1!

MATILDAI I don6t +now Not #et, an#wa#

MRS &HEL&S0"at1 But I I n6t t"ere o*e *ore1 I *ean 0e55, I uppo e #our *ot"er

w$55 8e wa$t$n( for #ou I "e "ere1 I6d 5o)e to *eet "er, a%tua55# 92AT L3A grabs her books and runs off the front of the stage.

MATILDAB#e, Mr &"e5p ! See #ou to*orrow!

MRS &HEL&SAfter #our f$r t da# of %"oo5!

20& $#!L$& e-its as a siren wails and the scene changes to *runchem #all Academy.A large iron gate made of s(uare holes of various sizes rolls in from both sidesof the stage. 2AT L3A5s classmates enter hesitantly from the front of the stage.

NIGELM# *u**# a# I6* a *$ra%5e

TOMMYM# dadd# a# I6* "$ pe%$a5 5$tt5e (u#

LA'ENDER



I a* a pr$n%e

ERICAnd I a* a pr$n%e

B 1 9 3& enter menacingly behind the gate.

ALICEMu* a# I6* an an(e5

AMANDAMu* a# I6* an an(e5

NIGELMu* a# I6* an an(e5

B 1 9 3& approach and start climbing onto the gate and grabbing the *# L30!% frombehind it.

BIG ?IDS And so you think you're able

(o sur"i"e this mess by being a prince or a princess. 4ou will soon see there's no escaping tragedy.

And e"en if you put in heaps of effort,

4ou're 2ust wasting energy,'1ause your life as you know it is ancient history.I ha"e suffered in this 2ail.

#a"e been trapped inside this cage for ages,(his li"ing 'ell.

But if I try I can remember,Back before my life had ended,

Before my happy days were o"er,Before I first heard the pealing of the bell.

/ike you, I was curious,%o innocent I asked a thousand )uestions.

But unless you want to suffer, listen up And I will teach you a thing or two.

4ou listen here, my dear, 4ou'll be punished so se"erely if you step out of line.

And if you cry it will be double. 4ou should stay out of trouble

And remember to be e5tremely careful.

NIGEL0"#1

BIG ?IDS hy*

BIG ?ID 3 B!% 40"#1 D$d #ou "ear w"at "e a$d1

BIG ?IDS

8ust you wait for phys ed!CHILDREN

0"at6 p"# 7ed1

BIG ?IDS&"# $%a5 edu%at$on!

BIG ?ID 3 B!% 4It6 t"e Trun%"8u556 pe%$a5$t#

The *# L30!% reach out from behind the gate as the B 1 9 3& carry them away.

ALICEMy mummy says I'm a miracle.

A""!

BRUCEMy daddy says I would be the teacher's pet!

A""!



LA'ENDER%chool is really fun, according to my mum.

A""!

AMANDA and ERIC0ad said I'd learn the alphabet!

BIG ?ID 3 B!% 4T"e a5p"a8et1 You6)e (otta 5earn to 5$ ten up, +$d

Two B 1 9 3& start climbing on the gate, flanking alphabet blocks as they are are pushed through the gate when they are mentioned in the song.

OLDER ?IDS And so you think you're A ble

(o sur"i"e this mess by B eing a prince or a princess. 4ou will soon 9 C : see there's no escaping trage D y.

And E "en if you put in heaps of e F fort, 4ou're 2ust wasting ener G y,

'1ause your life as you know it is $aitc H $ ent history.I ha"e suffered in this J ail,

I'"e been trapped inside this 9 K : cage for ages,(his li"ing 'e L l.

But if I try I can reme M ber,Back before my life had e N ded,

Before my happy days were O "er,Before I first heard the P ealing of the bell.

/ike you, I was 9 Q : curious,%o innocent I 9 R : asked a thousand )uestions,

But unle S s you want to suffer, listen up And I will Teach you a thing or two.

4o U listen here, my dear, 4ou'll be punished so se V erely if you step out of line.

And if you cry it will be 9 W : double. 4ou should stay out of trouble,

And remember to be e X tremely careful.

ERIC0" Y 1

BIG ?IDS hy*

BIG ?ID 3 B!% 40"#1 0"#1 D$d #ou "ear w"at we a$d1

The gate rolls away. 3esks rise from the ground and a blackboard makes its wayfrom the back of the stage. pon the blackboard is written the alphabet.

BIG ?IDS8ust you wait for phys ed! 8ust you wait for phys ed.

BIG ?IDS and CHILDREN A, B, 1, 0, , ;, &, #, I, 8, <, /, M, N, , , 6, 3, %, (, =, 7, , >.

CHILDREN hy, why, why, why, why, why, why*

A spotlight makes its way across the letters on the board, finally settling at theend on the letter :.

BIG ?IDS8ust you wait for phy Z ed!

The B 1 9 3& e-it and 2 && #+%!/ enters.

MISS HONEYGood *orn$n(, %"$5dren! M# na*e $ M$ Hone# And toda# $ a )er# pe%$a5 da#/

#our f$r t da# of %"oo5! Now, do an# of #ou +now an# of #our two t$*e ta85e 12AT L3A raises her hand.

MISS HONEY



0onderfu5 Mat$5da, $ n6t $t1 &5ea e, tand, and do a *u%" a #ou %an

MATILDAOne t$*e two $ two Two t$*e two $ four T"ree t$*e two $ $; =our t$*e

two $ e$("t =$)e t$*e two $ ten S$; t$*e two $ twe5)e Se)en t$*e two $fourteen E$("t t$*e two $ $;teen N$ne t$*e two $ e$("teen Ten t$*e two $

twent# E5e)en t$*e two $ twent#7two Twe5)e t$*e two $ twent#7four

MISS HONEY0e55, *# word

MATILDAT"$rteen t$*e two $ twent#7 $; =ourteen t$*e two $ twent#7e$("t =$fteen

t$*e two $ t"$rt# S$;teen t$*e two $ t"$rt#7two

MISS HONEYStop Stop! Good "ea)en How far %an #ou (o1

MATILDAI don6t +now @u$te a 5on( wa#, I t"$n+

MISS HONEYDo #ou t"$n+ #ou %ou5d te55 *e w"at two t$*e twent#7e$("t $ 1

MATILDA=$ft#7 $;

MISS HONEYYe Ye ! T"at $ )9 How a8out t"$ Now, t"$ $ *u%" "arder, o don6t

worr# $f #ou don6t (et $t Two t$*e four "undred and e$("t#7 e)en If #outoo+ #our t$*e 9

MATILDAN$ne "undred and e)ent#7four

MISS HONEYTwe5)e e)en 1

MATILDAE$("t#7four

CHILDRENNo wa#! 3 They start chattering. 4

MISS HONEYLet6 5ea)e *at" for t"e t$*e 8e$n( and 5oo+ at read$n( Now, %an an#one

read t"$ 1 3 &he underlines the sentence on the board. 4

2AT L3A, LA6!%3!0, and % 1!L raise their hands.

NIGELOo", *e, *e, *e, *$ ! I %an! Me, *e, *e, *e

MISS HONEY'er# we55 N$(e5

% 1!L leans forward in concentration and groans in agony several times. #e screamsand turns around, hitting !0 *5s cap against !0 *5s desk. #e bites the cap,

screaming through his teeth. MISS HONEY "urr$e to pu55 t"e %ap fro* NIGEL6*out"

MISS HONEYO+a# Ye , #e I t"$n+ we6d 8etter 5ea)e $t t"ere, N$(e5 0e don6t want to 8ur t

a 85ood )e e5 on #our f$r t da# La)ender1

LA'ENDERI t"e f$r t word :to*ato:1

MISS HONEYNo But t"e :to*ato: $ a )er# (ood word

LA'ENDERYe !

MISS HONEY



Mat$5da1

MATILDA:I %an now read word :

MISS HONEYSo, Mat$5da You %an read word

MATILDA

Ye 0e55, I needed to 5earn to read word o t"at I %ou5d read enten%e Be%au e8a $%a55# a enten%e $ <u t a 8$( 8un%" of word And $f #ou %an6t readenten%e , #ou6)e (ot no %"an%e w$t" 8oo+

2 && #+%!/ beckons 2AT L3A to the back of the class.

MISS HONEYAnd "a)e #ou read a w"o5e 8oo+1 Your e5f, Mat$5da1

MATILDAO", #e More t"an one I 5o)e 8oo+ La t wee+, I read >u$te a few

MISS HONEYA few! In $n $n a wee+ M#, *#, t"at $ (ood Er, w"at 8oo+ d$d #ou

read1

MATILDA%icholas %ickleby +liver Twist ;ane !yre Tess of the

35urbervilles The Lord of the 0ings 9im The nvisible2an The &ecret 1arden *rime and $unishment and *at in the

#at !

The school bell rings and all the children march out. The desks descend into theground. 2 && T0 %*#B LL5s office, complete with her in a high7backed chair <facingthe back of the stage= is wheeled in. 2 && #+%!/ faces the audience and raises her

fist.

MISS HONEY<nock on the door, 8enny. 8ust knock on the door.

0on't be pathetic!

<nock on the door, 8enny. (here's nothing to fear. 4ou're being pathetic!It's 2ust a door. 4ou'"e seen one before.

8ust knock on the door.

/ook at you trying to hide, silly.%tanding outside the principal's office like a little girl.

It's 2ust pathetic!O"! R$("t

/ook at you hesitating. #and's shaking. 4ou should be embarrassed. 4ou're not a little girl.

It's 2ust pathetic.

<nock on the door, 8enny. hat are you waiting for*

8ust knock on the door . . .erhaps I'll wait. %he's probably ha"ing a meeting or something and won't want to be interrupted. If anything,

caution in these situations is sensible. ne should a"oid confrontation when possible. I'll come back later, then.

But this little girl . . .(his miracle . . .

<nock on the door, 8enny. 8ust knock on the door.0on't be pathetic!

2 && #+%!/ knocks three times and winces.

MISS TRUNCHBULLEnter!

2 && #+%!/ turns and sees 2 && T0 %*#B LL watching various video screens playingfootage of her +lympic games while an announcer narrates dimly in the background.

&he stands paralyzed in fear.

MISS TRUNCHBULL



Don6t <u t tand t"ere 5$+e a wet t$ ue Get on w$t" $t

MISS HONEYYe Ye Ye , M$ Trun%"8u55 T"ere6 , er* In In In *# %5a ,

t"at $ , er, t"ere $ a 5$tt5e ($r5 %a55ed Mat$5da 0or*wood And 9

MISS TRUNCHBULLDau("ter of Mr Harr# 0or*wood w"o own 0or*wood Motur E;%e55ent *an To5d *e to

wat%" out for t"e 8rat, t"ou(" a# "e6 a rea5 wart

MISS HONEYO" no, Head*$ tre I don6t 8e5$e)e Mat$5da6 t"at +$nd of %"$5d at a55

2 && T0 %*#B LL turns off the screens with a remote and wheels around, holding amagnifying glass.

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at $ t"e %"oo5 *otto, M$ Hone#1

MISS HONEY:Ba*8$natu* e t *a($tu* :

MISS TRUNCHBULL:Ba*8$natu* e t *a($tu* : C"$5dren are *a((ot ! In fa%t, $t *u t "a)e 8een "er w"oput t"at t$n+ 8o*8 under *# de + t"$ *orn$n( I655 "a)e "er for t"at T"an+ #ou

for u((e t$n( $t 3 &he turns the screens back on. 4

MISS HONEYBut I d$dn6t 1 M$ Trun%"8u55, Mat$5da 0or*wood $ a (en$u !

MISS TRUNCHBULLNon en e Ha)en6t I <u t to5d #ou t"at "e $ a (an( ter1

MISS HONEYS"e +now "er t$*e ta85e

MISS TRUNCHBULLSo "e6 5earned a few tr$%+

MISS HONEY

O", 8ut "e %an read!MISS TRUNCHBULL

So %an I!

MISS HONEYI "a)e to te55 #ou, Head*$ tre , t"at $n $n $n *# op$n$on, t"$

5$tt5e ($r5 "ou5d 8e p5a%ed $n t"e top for* w$t" t"e e5e)en7#ear7o5d !

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at1 3 &he flicks the screens off again. 4 But "e $ a >u$8 A "r$*p An

un"at%"ed tadpo5e 0e %annot $*p5# p5a%e "er $n t"e top for* w$t" t"e e5e)en7#ear7o5d 0"at +$nd of o%$et# wou5d t"at 8e1 0"at a8out ru5e , Hone#1 Ru5e 1

MISS HONEYI 8e5$e)e t"at Mat$5da 0or*wood $ an e;%ept$on to t"e ru5e

MISS TRUNCHBULLAn e;%ept$on To t"e ru5e In *# %"oo51

/ook at these trophies.%ee how my trophies gleam in the sunlight*

%ee how they shine* hat do you think it took to become nglish #ammer (hrowing 1hampion ?@ @*

3 &he stands and approaches 2 && #+%!/ menacingly, towering over her. 40o you think in that moment, when my big moment came,

(hat I treated the rules with casual disdain* ell* /ike hell!

As I stepped up to the circle, did I change my plan*

#m* hat* As a chalked up my palms, did I wa"e my hands*I did not!

As I started my spin, did I look at the "iew*



0id I drift off and dream for a minute or two*0o you think I faltered or amended my rotation*

0o you think I altered my intended ele"ation* As the hammer took off, did I change my grunt

;rom the grunt I had practiced for many a month*Not a 2ot!

Not a dot did I stray from the plot.Not a detail of my throw was ad2usted or forgotten.

Not e"en when the hammer left my hands And sailed high up, up abo"e the stands

0id I let myself go.No, no, no, no ad lib. C

3 &he turns and walks back to her desk. &he daintily reaches up and captures afigurine of a woman throwing the hammer. 4

If you want to throw the hammer for your country, 4ou ha"e to stay inside the circle all the time. 3&he murmurs along to the music. 4

And if you want to make the team, 4ou don't need happiness or self esteem.

4ou 2ust need to keep your feet inside the line.

3 &he presses an intercom on her desk. 4S$n(, %"$5dren Two, t"ree, four

*# L30!% and B 1 9 3& appear in the bo-es to the upper left and upper right of thestage and sing.

MISS TRUNCHBULL and CHILDRENIf you want to throw the hammer for your country.

BIG ?IDSBambinatum est magitum.

MISS TRUNCHBULL and CHILDREN 4ou ha"e to stay inside the circle +

MISS TRUNCHBULL – all the time.

BIG ?IDS1irculum, maggitum, maggitum.

MISS TRUNCHBULL And if you want to teach success,

4ou don't use sympathy or tenderness.

CHILDREN and BIG ?IDS(enderness.

MISS TRUNCHBULL 4ou ha"e to force the little s)uits to toe the line!

3 &he grabs a baton with a yellow ribbon attached to it and starts twirling to the

music. 4S$n(, enn#! Two, t"ree, four!

MISS HONEY, BIG ?IDS, and CHILDRENIf you want to throw the hammer for your country,

BIG ?IDSBambinatum! Bambinatum! &loria Magitum!

MISS HONEY, BIG ?IDS, and CHILDREN 4ou ha"e to stay inside the circle all the time.

BIG ?IDS1irculum est 0eus! 0eus!

MISS TRUNCHBULL Apply 2ust one simple rule

(o hammer throwing, life, and school +/ife's a ball, so learn to throw it,

;ind the bally line and toe it,



And always keep your feet inside the line!3 &he throws the baton across the stage, does a 8et> to catch it, and points her

finger at 2 && #+%!/. 4Now get out.

2 && T0 %*#B LL carries the ribbon back to her desk and sits down. &he starts thevideo screens playing again.

MISS HONEYI "a)e to te55 #ou, Head*$ tre , t"at $t $ *# $ntent$on to "e5p t"$ 5$tt5e

($r5 0"et"er #ou 5$+e $t or not

2 && #+%!/ e-its off the front of the stage. The scene changes to the 'ormwood5sliving room. 20& '+02'++3 and 2 *#A!L down sit in armchairs. 2AT L3A sits down

reading a book. 20 '+02'++3 paces the stage.

MR 0ORM0OODStup$d, na t#, t$n+$n(, 5$*# Great, 8$(, >ue t$on7a +$n( How dare

t"e# pea+ to *e 5$+e t"at! 0"o t"e "e55 do t"e# t"$n+ t"e# are1 =5$pp$n(, f$5t"#,na t#, tup$d Ru $an !

MRS 0ORM0OODDon6t te55 *e 0e6re not r$%"

MR 0ORM0OODIt6 t"e *$5ea(e T"e# too+ one 5oo+ at t"e *$5ea(e on t"e f$r t %ar and t"e# a$d

t"at t"e e %ar were a55 +na%+ered I to5d t"e*, I a$d, :He# T"e rea on t"e*$5ea(e $ o "$(" $ a *anufa%tur$n( *$ ta+e :

MATILDAI t"at true1

MR 0ORM0OODOf %our e $t6 not true

MATILDASo #ou 5$ed1

MR 0ORM0OOD

Of %our e I 5$ed!MATILDA

And t"e# d$dn6t 8e5$e)e #ou1

MR 0ORM0OODOf %our e t"e# d$dn6t 8e5$e)e *e/ I6)e (ot 9 (reen 9 "a$r!

MICHAELI6)e (ot "a$r

20 '+02'++3 runs over and grabs 2AT L3A5s book.

MR 0ORM0OOD0"at6 t"$ 1 Anot"er f5a*$n( 8oo+1 0"at6 wron( w$t" t"e te55#1

MRS 0ORM0OODS"e6 (ot no re pe%t, t"at one 0$t" "er, $t6 a55 :8oo+ : and : tor$e :

MATILDAO", no, $t6 a 5o)e5# 8oo+ Hone t You "ou5d read $t I6* ure #ou6d 9

MR 0ORM0OOD:Lo)e5#:1 Here6 w"at I t"$n+ of #our 5o)e5# 9 3 #e starts pulling at the book as

though to tear it apart. 4

MATILDANo, $t6 a 5$8rar# 8oo+! It6 fro* t"e 5$8rar#!

MRS 0ORM0OODYou "ow t"e 5$tt5e 8rat! Go on, t"en!

20 '+02'++3 is having a lot of trouble with the book, even putting his foot on itand pulling at it.

MR 0ORM0OOD



O", t"$ $ t"$%+! How do #ou do t"$ 1 Co*e on!

)inally, he grabs an individual page in glee.

MR 0ORM0OODLoo+ w"at I6)e <u t found! Loo+ at t"at! T"e#6re $nd$)$dua5!

#e rips out several pages and throws them dramatically on the ground.

MR 0ORM0OODNow, (et out of "ere, #ou 5$tt5e t$n+ wor*! 3 to 2 *#A!L 4 Get up, 8o#

2 *#A!L gets up and 20 '+02'++3 sits down on his recliner. 2 *#A!L sits on hislap. 20 '+02'++3 tickles him and 2 *#A!L laughs suddenly, then falls back into his

normal dull e-pression. 2AT L3A collects the remains of her book.

MATILDADo we "a)e an# uper (5ue1

MR 0ORM0OODIn t"e %up8oard And, w"$5e #ou6re at $t, w"# don6t #ou t$%+ #our tup$d 8oo+ to

#our tup$d "ead1

The 'ormwoods laugh. Their furniture is wheeled off the stage and a hat rack with20 '+02'++35s hat and an umbrella is brought center stage. 2AT L3A opens a

cupboard at the front of the stage.MATILDA

8ust because you find that life's not fair, it0oesn't mean that you 2ust ha"e to grin and bear it.

If you always take it on the chin and wear it,Nothing will change.

3 &he puts the book in the cupboard and hurries to the hat rack with a bottlereading "sooper gloo". &he uses the umbrella to bring down the hat and starts

lining it with glue. 4

"en if you're little, you can do a lot. 4ouMustn't let a little thing like $little$ stop you.If you sit around and let them get on top, you

Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, And that's not right!

2AT L3A hides the glue behind her back as 20 '+02'++3 enters. &he holds the hatout to him. #e takes it and s(uashes it firmly down onto his head.

MR 0ORM0OODI6)e (ot *# e#e on #ou, 8o#

MATILDAI6* a ($r5!

20 '+02'++3 e-its. The hat rack is taken away. *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& run in,creating pandemonium. !ventually, they (uieten down, but LA6!%3!0 continues to

8ump up in down ne-t to 2AT L3A, who is reading.

LA'ENDERMat$5da1 Can I a + #ou a >ue t$on1 Do a55 t"o e 8ra$n $n #our "ead ($)e #ou a

"eada%"e1 I *ean, $t6 (ot to "urt, a55 >u$ "ed $n t"ere

MATILDANo, $t6 f$ne I t"$n+ t"e# <u t 9 f$t

LA'ENDERR$("t 0e55, I6d 8etter "an( around <u t $n %a e If t"e# tart to >ueeee e outof #our ear , #ou6re (o$n( to need "e5p 3 &he holds her hand out to 2AT L3A, who

takes it. 4 I6* La)ender, and I t"$n+ $t6 pro8a85# for t"e 8e t $f we6re 8e tfr$end !

% 1!L runs in up the steps stage left, screaming.

NIGELH$de *e! So*eone poured a w"o5e %an of #rup onto Trun%"8u556 %"a$r S"e atdown, and w"en "e (ot up "er +n$%+er ta#ed tu%+ to t"e eat! So*eone

to5d "er I d$d $t, 8ut I ne)er! And now "e6 after *e!



MATILDAT"at6 not fa$r! T"at6 not fa$r at a55!

BIG ?IDYou6re done, +$d You6re 9

BIG ?IDS=$n$ "ed!

BIG ?ID 3 0/A% 4On%e A(at"a Trun%"8u55 de%$de #ou6re (u$5t#, #ou6re 9

BIG ?IDSS>u$ "ed!

BIG ?ID 3 TA2 9A 4Ye terda#, "e %au("t u5$u Rottw$n+5e eat$n( a (o8 topper dur$n( %$en%e S"e

<u t p$%+ed "$* up, wun( "$* around, and t"rew "$* out t"e 9

BIG ?IDS0$ndow!

MATILDADon6t 5$ ten to t"e* T"at d$dn6t "appen T"e#6re tr#$n( to %are u

NIGELO", Mat$5da! T"e# a# "e6 (o$n( to put *e $n C"o+e#!

MATILDA0"at 0"at6 C"o+e#1

NIGELT"e# a# $t6 a %up8oard $n "er off$%e t"at "e t"row %"$5dren $nto T"e# a#

"e6 5$ned $t w$t" na$5 , and p$+e , and 8$t of 8ro+en (5a

BIG ?IDS(here's a place you are sent if you ha"en't been good,

BIG ?ID 3 B!% 4 And it's made of spikes and wood.

BIG ?IDS And it isn't wide enough to sit.

BIG ?ID 3 TA/L+0 4 And e"en if you could,

BIG ?IDS(here are nails on the bottom,

BIG ?ID 3 TA/L+0 4%o you wish you'd +

BIG ?IDS%tood!

hen the hinges creak and the door is closed, 4ou cannot see s)uat +BIG ?ID 3 TA2 9A 4

Not the end of your nose.

BIG ?IDS And when you scream, you don't know if the sound came out,

r if the scream in your head e"en reached your mouth!Auuurrr("!

2AT L3A gazes at their dramatic display non7chalantly and holds out a palm tothem.

MATILDAA55 r$("t 3 to %igel 4 0"en d$d t"$ "appen1

NIGELTwent# *$nute a(o But, w"#1

)rom offstage, 2 && T0 %*#B LL blows on her whistle.



NIGELO", no, "e6 %o*$n(!

MATILDAYou6d 8etter "$de! @u$%+, <a%+et !

% 1!L lies down on the ground. The *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& take off their blazersand throw them on top of him. They line up at the back of the stage. 2 &&

T0 %*#B LL runs in, blowing on her whistle, and chases !0 * down until he is pulled into formation by two B 1 9 3&.

MISS TRUNCHBULL3 to 2AT L3A 4 You! 0"ere $ t"e *a((ot +nown a N$(e51

MATILDAHe6 o)er t"ere, under t"o e %oat

The *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& hang their heads. 2 && T0 %*#B LL walks heavily towardthe coats.

MATILDA0"ere "e6 8een for t"e 5a t "our, a%tua55#

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at1 An "our1

MATILDAO", #e You ee, unfortunate5#, N$(e5 uffer fro* t"e rare, 8ut %"ron$% 5eep

d$ order, nar%o5ep # T"e %ond$t$on $ %"ara%ter$ ed 8# t"e ufferer e;per$en%$n(8out of %"ron$% fat$(ue, and fa55$n( udden5# a 5eep, often w$t"out +now$n(, oran# warn$n( at a55 You ee, "e fe55 a 5eep, and we put "$* under t"e %oat for

afet# D$dn6t we1 D$dn6t we1!

CHILDREN and BIG ?IDSYe !

BIG ?ID 3 0/A% 4Nar%o5op #!

MATILDAHe655 pro8a85# t"$n+ "e6 $n 8ed w"en "e wa+e up

% 1!L sits up, yawning and stretching.

NIGELI $t t$*e for %"oo5 #et, *u*1 He55o! 0"at a* do$n( "ere1 0e55, t"$ $ n6t *#

roo* at a55! O", "e55o, M$ Trun%"8u55

Angrily, 2 && T0 %*#B LL looks from % 1!L to 2AT L3A and back.

MISS TRUNCHBULLA*anda T"r$pp

The *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& step back, leaving A2A%3A in a spotlight.

AMANDAYe , M$ Trun%"8u551

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at "a)e I to5d #ou a8out wear$n( p$(ta$5 1 I "ate p$(ta$5 !

2 && T0 %*#B LL hurries over to A2A%3A. The B 1 9 3& and *# L30!% scurry away.

AMANDABut *# *u**# 5$+e t"e*! S"e a# t"e# *a+e *e 5oo+ prett#!

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"en #our *u**# $ a tw$t!

2 && T0 %*#B LL grabs A2A%3A by the pigtails and swings her around and around. Thestage goes black. 'hen lights come up again, A2A%3A is gone. The B 1 9 3& and*# L30!% take up various positions around the stage and audience, pointing in

every which way. The announcer from 2 && T0 %*#B LL5s videos starts commentating.)lashbulbs go off. A spotlight searches the theater. All the while, A2A%3A5s

screams get louder.



BIG ?IDHere "e %o*e !

"A2A%3A" drops from the rafters above the audience into a pile of coats underneathher. A2A%3A stands up and screams in triumph. 2 && T0 %*#B LL flails victoriously,

then starts blowing her whistle. The *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& line up again.

MISS TRUNCHBULL3 to 2AT L3A 4 You! 0"at $ #our na*e1

MATILDAMat$5da Mat$5da 0or*wood

MISS TRUNCHBULLSo #ou6re 0or*wood, are #ou1 I *$("t "a)e +nown 0e55, Mat$5da 0or*wood You "a)e

<u t *ade a )er# 8$( *$ ta+e 3 3aintily, straightening her collar, 2 && T0 %*#B LLe-its off the front of the stage. 4

LA'ENDERu t o #ou a55 +now, "e6 *# 8e t fr$end!

BIG ?IDS and CHILDREN0ow!

B 1 9 3& and *# L30!% run off. &pangly ribbons are strung across the stage. 20'+02'++3 enters with a lackey, who sits on a tyre behind him. The lackey is

wearing a shirt that reads "'ormwood 2oturs".

MR 0ORM0OODBrand new to%+, $r! O", #e Co*p5ete5# d$fferent %ar , $r Green "a$r1 Yea",

$t wa , er 9 3 #e gestures to the lackey. 4 9 Nat$ona5 Green Ha$r Da#! A %e5e8rat$onof a55 t"e wonderfu5 (reen t"$n( $n t"e wor5d, 5$+e, er, o", 5$+e 5ettu%e, and

not To*orrow at one1 A8 o5ute5#, $r! Yea" B#e78#e, $r Do )edoo7da" 3 #ethrows the phone to the lackey. 4 Now, t"at $ "ow #ou do $t! 3 #e tries and failsto pull his hat off, tugging on it several times. 4 Hat ee* to 8e, er 3 #e

stomps and crouches on the floor, pulling at his hat and making sounds ofe-ertion. #e flails around the stage. 4 O", *# "ead! 3 #e finally gives up and

straightens up casually. 4 I t"$n+ I6* (onna +eep t"$ on Loo+ 5$+e ra$n

20 '+02'++3 grabs his suitcase and e-its along with the lackey. The scene changesto the 'ormwood5s living room. 20& '+02'++3 has her leg raised up and 0 3+L$#+ is

holding it against his back. 2 && #+%!/ enters and knocks.

MRS 0ORM0OOD0"o $ $t1

MISS HONEYO", er, "e55o It6 M$ Hone# Mat$5da6 tea%"er1

MRS 0ORM0OODB$t 8u # r$("t now!

MISS HONEYO", $t w$55 on5# ta+e a *o*ent

MRS 0ORM0OODO", %o*e $n $f #ou *u t

2 && #+%!/ enters and turns away in shock.

MRS 0ORM0OODT"$ $ Rudo5p"o! O", $t6 not"$n( 5$+e t"at He6 *# dan%e partner 0e6re

re"ear $n(

0 3+L$#+ saunters over and holds his arm out to 2 && #+%!/.

RUDOL&HOC$ao

MISS HONEY

O", par5e Ita5$ano1 C$ao, Rudo5p"o &$a%e55$ Co*e ta$1RUDOL&HO

0ot1 0"o $ t"$ , 8a8e1 You +now w"at $nterrupt$on do to *# ener(# f5ow 3 #e sitsdown in a zen position. 4



MRS 0ORM0OOD0"at do #ou want, M$ C"utne#1

MISS HONEYO", $t6 M$ Hone# Er*, we55, a #ou +now, Mat$5da $ $n t"e 8otto* %5a And

And %"$5dren $n t"e 8otto* %5a aren6t rea55# e;pe%ted to read

MRS 0ORM0OOD0e55, t"en top "er read$n(! Lord +now we6)e tr$ed

0 3+L$#+ dances across the back of the stage.

RUDOL&HOI6* $n t"e one, do55! I %an fee5 $t $n *# "$p Don6t wa te t"$ 3 #e slides down

on his thighs stage left. 4

MRS 0ORM0OODLoo+ I6* not $n fa)or of ($r5 (ett$n( a55 %5e)er7pant , M$ Hu # A ($r5

"ou5d t"$n+ a8out *a+e7up and "a$r d#e Loo+ are *ore $*portant t"an 8oo+ Now,5oo+ at #ou, and 5oo+ at *e You %"o e 8oo+ I %"o e 5oo+ !

RUDOL&HOBa8e , I6* on f$re, "ere! &5ea e! 3 #e dances backwards and 20& '+02'++3 follows

along. 4

MISS HONEYBut Mat$5da %an %a5%u5ate %o*p5$%ated f$(ure $n "er "ead $n an $n tant!

RUDOL&HOCa5%u5ate t"$ ! 3 #e does a split in front of 2 && #+%!/. 4

MRS 0ORM0OOD=anta t$%o!

MISS HONEYHer *$nd $ $n%red$85e 0$t" a 5$tt5e "e5p fro* u , "e %ou5d (o to un$)er $t#

8efore "e 9

MRS 0ORM0OOD2ind? Her *$nd1 You rea55# don6t +now an#t"$n(, do #ou1

%omewhere along the way, my dear, 4ou'"e made an awful error.

4ou oughtn't blame yourself now, come along. 4ou seem to think that people like people what are cle"er.

It's "ery )uaint, it's "ery sweet,But wrong.

eople don't like smarty pants what go 'round1laiming that they know stuff we don't know.

Now, "ere6 a t$p/ hat you know matters less

(han the "olume with which what you don't know's e5pressed.1ontent has ne"er been less important, so

4ou ha"e got to be/ =0!

&irl, you'"e gotta learn to stand up and stick out from the1rowd!

A little less flat, a lot more heel. A little less fact, a lot more feel.

A little less brains, a lot more hair. A little less head, a lot more derriere.

3&he gets on all fours as 0 3+L$#+ rides her like a horse. 40"oa! Ne$("!

0 3+L$#+ starts dancing with and carrying around 2 && #+%!/, which he continues todo throughout the song. 2 && #+%!/, dazed, follows the dance as best she can.

MRS 0ORM0OODNo one's gonna tell you when to shake your tush. ell, you got a light. 0on't hide it under a bushel.

No one's going to look if you don't stand out.



No one's going to listen if you don't shout.No one's gonna care if you don't care,

%o go and put some highlights in your hair.'1ause you'"e gotta highlight what you got.

"en if what you got is not a lot. 4ou gotta be loud!

4ou gotta gi"e yourself permission to shine.

(o stand up and be proud!0"ee! A little less DDD, a lot more Ding.

A little less shh, a lot more schwing. A little less dressing like your mum.

A little more bah da, ba ba ba da bom!

3&he takes a mirror from the armchair. 4O", I 5oo+ n$%e 3 to 2 && #+%!/ 4 You don6t!

No one's gonna tell you when to wiggle your bumba.

RUDOL&HONo one's gonna lo"e you if you don't know the rumba.

MRS 0ORM0OOD"erybody lo"es a little something e5otic.

RUDOL&HOBut learning a language is o"er the top +

MRS 0ORM0OODIt doesn't really matter if you don't know much!

RUDOL&HO As long as you donEt know it with the "olume up.

20& '+02'++3 puts a number on 0 3+L$#+5s back as though they are competing in adancing competition.

MRS 0ORM0OOD and RUDOL&HO

(he less you ha"e to sell, the harder you sell it.(he less you ha"e to say, the louder you yell it.(he dumber the act, the bigger the confession.

(he less you ha"e to show, the louder you dress it.

0 3+L$#+ whips off 20& '+02'++35s skirt to reveal a shorter skirt made of tasselsbeneath it.

MRS 0ORM0OOD and RUDOL&HO 4ou gotta get up!

4ou gotta get up and be loud!

A table with the word "*ontest" emblazoned on the side is wheeled in. )our 8udgesin outrageous costumes sit behind it.

UDGEYour <ud(e !

Two other dancing teams come in and 8oin 20& '+02'++3 and 0 3+L$#+ in thecompetition. They dance to the same routine until 20& '+02'++3 and 0 3+L$#+

overtake them with more complicated choreography.

MRS 0ORM0OODI6* t"e 8e t! I6* t"e 8e t! I6* t"e 8e t!

Three 8udges hold up signs reading "4@" as 20& '+02'++3 sits on the table. &heholds up the final "4@".

MRS 0ORM0OODTen! Of %our e! I *ean, w"at e5 e1

4ou gotta be loud!%tand out from the crowd! Are you listening* 4ou gotta be loud!



%tand up and be proud!

BAC?GROUND SINGERS/oud, loud, loud, loud!/oud, loud, loud, loud!/oud, loud, loud, loud!

MRS 0ORM0OOD 4ou gotta be loud!

The other dancers and 8udges e-it, leaving 20& '+02'++3 and 0 3+L$#+ in a dramatic position. They then saunter off. 2 && #+%!/ is left in a pile stage right.

MISS HONEY%top being pathetic, 8enny. 8ust get on your feet, 8enny.

4ou are going to march in there and gi"e them a piece of your mind./ea"e it alone, 8enny. (he more that you try,

(he more you'll 2ust look like a fool.(his it not your problem. 4ou'"e not got the spine.

4ou are a teacher. 8ust go back to school!

But this little girl . . . (his miracle . . .%he seems not to know that she's special at all.

And what sort of teacher would I beIf I let this little girl fall* I can see(his little girl needs somebody strong to fight by her side.

Instead, she's found me. athetic, little me. And another door closes. And 8enny's outside.

2 && #+%!/ e-its behind the stacks as the library scene rolls in. 20& $#!L$& issitting on a block and 2AT L3A is standing on one, holding the two dolls.

MATILDAAnd o, t"e (reat da# arr$)ed! It wa 5$+e t"e ent$re wor5d "ad (at"ered to ee

T"e Burn$n( 0o*an, Hur5$n( T"rou(" t"e A$r, w$t" D#na*$te $n Her Ha$r, O)er S"ar+and Sp$+# O8<e%t , Cau("t B# t"e Man Lo%+ed $n a Ca(e E)er#t"$n( wa arran(ed 8#

9 3 &he pulls her coat over her head to simulate a hunchback, and grabs a largebook. 4 9 t"e A%ro8at6 $ ter, a fr$("ten$n( wo*an w"o u ed to 8e an O5#*p$%7%5a

"a**er7t"rower, w"o 5o)ed not"$n( 8etter t"an to %are t"e %"$5dren of t"e town&eop5e w"$ pered t"at $n "er dar+ and 8rood$n( "eart, "e re ented t"e $ ter,

8ot" "er u%%e and "er 5o)e

The !&*A$+L+1 &T starts to walk in from the back of the stage. #e stands up on ablock.

MATILDASudden5#, out %a*e t"e E %apo5o($ t, dre ed a u ua5 $n "$ t$("t and pan(5#

%o tu*e But t"ere wa no $(n of t"e A%ro8at, and no (5$*p e at a55 of "er "$n#w"$te %arf And $n tead of a *u $%a5 fanfare, t"ere wa $5en%e, a "e o5e*n5#

trode $nto t"e roo*

MATILDA and ESCA&OLOGISTLad$e and (ent5e*en! Bo# and ($r5 ! T"e Burn$n( 0o*an, Hur5$n( T"rou(" t"e A$r,

w$t" D#na*$te $n Her Ha$r, O)er S"ar+ and Sp$+# O8<e%t , Cau("t B# t"e Man Lo%+ed$n a Ca(e "a 8een %an%e55ed!

MRS &HEL&SNo!

MATILDAYe ! T"e aud$en%e (a ped o 5oud t"at a pa $n( aerop5ane %au("t $t on $t

$n tru*entat$on and re%orded $t a an at*o p"er$% p"eno*enon

MATILDA and ESCA&OLOGISTCan%e55ed, 8e%au e *# w$fe $ pre(nant!

MRS &HEL&SO", Mat$5da!

MATILDAA8 o5ute $5en%e You %ou5d "a)e "eard a f5# 8urp T"en udden5#, t"e aud$en%e

<u*ped to $t feet and roared $n appre%$at$on!



An audience cheers. The A*0+BAT enters from the back of the stage, and the!&*A$+L+1 &T takes her by the hand. They embrace and e-it out the back of the

stage.

MATILDAT"e (reat feat wa $n tant5# for(otten, and t"e app5au e went on for near5# an

"our

MRS &HEL&SSo $t "a a "app# end$n(!

MATILDA=or(otten, 8# e)er#one e;%ept, t"at $ 9 3 &he pulls her coat over her head. 4 9 t"e

A%ro8at6 $ ter 0"en a55 "ad >u$etened down, "e tepped forward andprodu%ed a %ontra%t

MRS &HEL&SA A %ontra%t1

MATILDA and t"e ACROBAT6S SISTER 3 off7stage 4:A %ontra%t wa $(ned to perfor* t"$ feat, and perfor* t"$ feat #ou "a55!:

MRS &HEL&SNo!

MATILDA and t"e ACROBAT6S SISTER 3 off7stage 4:I "a)e pa$d for t"e po ter , pu85$%$t#, t"e %ater$n(, t"e to$5et fa%$5$t$e If I($)e t"e %rowd t"e$r *one# 8a%+, w"ere $ *# prof$t1! A %ontra%t $ a %ontra%t $

a %ontra%t! M# "and are t$ed T"e Burn$n( 0o*an, Hur5$n( T"rou(" t"e A$r, w$t"D#na*$te $n Her Ha$r, O)er S"ar+ and Sp$+# O8<e%t , Cau("t 8# t"e Man Lo%+ed $n a

Ca(e w$55 8e perfor*ed, and perfor*ed t"$ da#, or off to pr$ on #ou 8ot""a55 (o!:

MRS &HEL&SNo! No!

2AT L3A holds her a dramatic pose, holding the large book above her head.

MRS &HEL&S

0e55, w"at "appened ne;t1MATILDA

I don6t +now I655 te55 #ou to*orrow

MRS &HEL&S0"at1! I don6t +now $f *# ner)e w$55 *a+e $t unt$5 to*orrow

MATILDAMr &"e5p 1 Are #ou %r#$n(1 Ma#8e I "ou5dn6t te55 #ou an# *ore

MRS &HEL&SO", no, Mat$5da 0e *u t f$nd out "ow $t end And I6* not %r#$n( 8e%au e

$t6 ad It6 <u t t"at t"e# want t"at %"$5d o )er# *u%" It *u t 8e wonderfu5for a %"$5d to 8e o wanted

MATILDAYe , wonderfu5 Good78#e, Mr &"e5p

20& $#!L$& e-its with the blocks. 2AT L3A stands at the front of the stage as herclassmates walk in and the desks rise from the ground. They sits and unpack their

bags. 2 && #+%!/ enters and erases the board.

MISS HONEYMat$5da1 Cou5d I pea+ to #ou for a *o*ent, p5ea e1 I6* afra$d I6)e not 8een too

u%%e fu5 $n (ett$n( ot"er to re%o(n$ e #our a8$5$t$e So, tart$n(to*orrow, I "a55 8r$n( a e5e%t$on of )er# %5e)er 8oo+ t"at I t"$n+ w$55

%"a55en(e #our *$nd And #ou *a# $t and read w"$5e I tea%" t"e ot"er , and, we55,$f #ou "a)e an# >ue t$on , I "a55 do *# 8e t to an wer t"e* How doe t"at ound1

2AT L3A stares up at her for several long seconds. &he then steps forward and hugs2 && #+%!/ tightly.

MISS HONEYMat$5da, t"at T"at $ t"e 8$((e t "u( $n t"e wor5d 3 &he wraps her hands



around 2AT L3A. 4 You6re (o$n( to "u( a55 t"e a$r out of *e

MISS TRUNCHBULLMat$5da 0or*wood! Mat$5da 0or*wood!

2 && #+%!/ steps away from 2AT L3A as 2 && T0 %*#B LL enters by the blackboard.

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"ere $ Ma9

2AT L3A holds up her hand.

MATILDAYe , M$ Trun%"8u55

MISS TRUNCHBULLSo #ou ad*$t $t, do #ou1

MATILDAAd*$t w"at, M$ Trun%"8u551

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"$ %5ot, t"$ fou5 %ar8un%5e $ none ot"er t"an a d$ (u t$n( %r$*$na5! 3 &he

takes 2AT L3A by the wrist and leads her to !0 *5s desk. 4 A den$ en of t"eunderwor5d! A *e*8er of t"e *af$a! 3 &he shoves !0 * out of his seat so 2AT L3A can

stand on his desk. 4ERICA"!

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"$ *orn$n(, #ou nea+ed 5$+e a erpent $nto t"e +$t%"en and to5e a 5$%e of *#

pr$)ate %"o%o5ate %a+e fro* *# tea tra#

MATILDANo, I d$d not!

MISS HONEY3 placatingly 4 M$ Trun%"8u55 Mat$5da6 8een "ere a55 *orn$n(

MISS TRUNCHBULLStand$n( up for t"e 5$tt5e p$t78a55, are #ou1 0e55, t"$ %r$*e too+ p5a%e 8efore

%"oo5 tarted And t"erefore, "e $ (u$5t#!

The room freezes as 2 && T0 %*#B LL starts to write the word "1 LT/" on theboard. There is a spotlight on B0 *! as he begins to talk.

BRUCEO+a#! Loo+! A55 r$("t! I to5e t"e %a+e And "one t5#, I wa rea55#, def$n$te5#,ort of, a5*o t t"$n+$n( a8out own$n( up Ma#8e But t"e t"$n( wa , I wa "a)$n( a

5ot of trou85e w$t" *# 8e55# You ee, t"e Trun%"8u556 %a+e wa o (ood t"at I6d%offed $t down too >u$%+, and now $t wa 8e($nn$n( to f$("t 8a%+ 3 #is stomach

growls. 4 Oop ! See!

B0 *! turns back around and the scene unfreezes. 2 && T0 %*#B LL finishes writingthe word "1 LT/" on the board.

MATILDAI6* not (u$5t#! I d$dn6t do an#t"$n(!

MISS TRUNCHBULLYou are (u$5t#, 8e%au e #ou are a f$end You are a %roo+ You are a t"$ef! And I

"a55 %ru " #ou I "a55 pound #ou I "a55 %on $(n #ou to t"e e)ent" %$r%5e of"e55, %"$5d You "a55 8e You "a55 8e de tro#ed

B0 *! turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. The *# L30!% thrash in theirseats. The scene freezes again for B0 *! to talk.

BRUCEIt wa t"e 8$((e t 8urp I "ad e)er done It wa t"e 8$((e t 8urp I "ad e)er "eardT"e 8$((e t 8urp I "ad e)er "eard a8out! It wa 5$+e t"e ent$re wor5d went $5ent

for t"at 8urp to e;$ t

A purple spotlight starts to make its way from Bruce across the classroom.



BRUCEA a "u(e %5oud of %"o%o5ate7# (a wafted fro* *# *out" and dr$fted a%ro t"e

%5a &a t La)ender &a t A5$%e &a t Mat$5da And t"en, *# (reat, 8$(, 8eaut$fu5%"o%o5ate7# 8urp, w"$%" now ee*ed to "a)e a *$nd of $t own, wafted fu55 $nto t"e

fa%e of t"e Trun%"8u55!

The scene unfreezes. 2 && T0 %*#B LL grimaces as the purple spotlight leaves her.The *# L30!%, save B0 *!, but including 2 && #+%!/, hide under the desks. 2 &&

T0 %*#B LL sniffs and licks the air. &he then sniffs her way across the room,following the former path of the spotlight. &he stops in triumph.

MISS TRUNCHBULLBru%e Bo(trotter

BRUCEYe , *$ 1

MISS TRUNCHBULLYou 5$+ed *# %a+e, d$dn6t #ou, Bru%e1

BRUCEYe , M$ Trun%"8u55! And I6* )er# orr# 9

MISS TRUNCHBULL

O", no, no, no, no, no A 5on( a #ou en<o#ed t"e %a+e T"at6 t"e *a$n t"$n(BRUCE

I $t1

MISS TRUNCHBULLYe ! Bo(trotter, $t $

BRUCE0e55, I d$d T"an+ #ou

MISS TRUNCHBULL0onderfu5 Mar)e55ou T"at *a+e *e o "app# It ($)e *e a war* (5ow $n *# 5ower

$nte t$ne O", %oo+

The cook enters, holding an enormous chocolate cake on a tray, along with a woodenspoon. &he puts it down on the desk behind B0 *!. &he e-its, not before scratching

her behind and wiping her nose.

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at6 t"e *atter, Bo(trotter1 Lo t #our appet$te1

BRUCE0e55, #e I6* fu55

MISS TRUNCHBULLO", no, #ou are not :fu55: I655 te55 #ou w"en #ou are fu55 And I a# t"at

%r$*$na5 5$+e #ou are not fu55 unt$5 #ou "a)e eaten t"e ent$re %a+e

BRUCEBut 9

MISS TRUNCHBULLNo :8ut : You "a)en6t (ot t$*e for :8ut: Eat

BRUCEBut I %an6t eat $t a55!

MISS HONEYHead*$ tre , "e655 8e $%+!

MISS TRUNCHBULLHe "ou5d "a)e t"ou("t of t"at 8efore "e *ade a pa%t w$t" Satan and de%$ded to

tea5 *# %a+e!3 sometimes, to be in time with the music 0e551 Co*e on!4

Eat!

CHILDRENHe %an6t!

MISS TRUNCHBULL



Eat!

CHILDRENHe ure5# %an6t!

MISS TRUNCHBULLEat!

CHILDREN

He *$("t e;p5ode!MISS TRUNCHBULL

Eat!!

2 && T0 %*#B LL strides to the board. +ver the course of the song, she writes onthe board "*opy one million times by tomorrow. am ) LL when and only when the#eadmistress says am) LL. am 1 LT/ when the #eadmistress says am 1 LT/."

CHILDREN A single slice,

r e"en two, Bruce,Might ha"e been nice,But e"en you, Bruce,

#a"e to admitBetween you and it,

(here's not a lot of difference in siDe.

CHILDREN #e can't!

CHILDREN -#e can!Bruce!

CHILDREN #e surely can't!He surely can t!

CHILDREN -

4ou are the man,Bruce!

CHILDREN #e might e5plode!

CHILDREN -#e's )uite elastic . . .

CHILDREN #e's going to blow. Make him stop!

CHILDREN -#e's fantastic! /ook at him go!

CHILDREN I can't watch!CHILDREN

I think in effect,(his must confirm, Bruce, hat we all suspected.

4ou ha"e a worm,Bruce!

r maybe your largenessIs like the (A30I%-

1onsiderably roomier inside.

CHILDREN #e can't!

CHILDREN -#e can!

CHILDREN



#e surely can't!#e surely can't!

CHILDREN - 4ou are the man,

Bruce!

CHILDRENB 3 1 !

Bruce! 4ou'll ne"er again be sub2ect to abuse for your immense caboose.

%he'll call a truce, Bruce. ith e"ery swallow, you are tightening the noose.

e ne"er thought it was possible,But here it is, coming true-

e can ha"e our cake and it it too!

(he time has come to put that tumbly tum to use.No e5cuse, Bruce.

/et out your belt. I think you'll want your trousers loose.

h +%tuff it in. 9Bruce!: 4ou're almost finished. 9Bruce!:

4ou'll fit it in. hate"er you do, 2ust don't gi"e in.

0on't let her win.1ome on, Bruce, be our hero.

1o"er yourself in chocolate glory!

BRUCEIt6 too *u%"! It6 <u t too *u%"!

MATILDAGo on, Bru%e Do $t

MISS TRUNCHBULLS$5en%e!

B0 *! wilts by the desk. LA6!%3!0 puts the wooden spoon back in his hand. #e dropsit again. Then after several seconds, he picks it up and returns to the cake withrenewed vigour.

CHILDRENh +

Bruce! 4ou'll ne"er again be sub2ect to abuse for your immense caboose.

%he'll call a truce, Bruce.8ust one more bite and you'll'"e completely cooked her goose.

e ne"er thought it was possible,But here it is, coming true-

e can ha"e our cake and eat it +

Ah ah aah ah Ah ah aah ah Ah ah aah ah Ah ah aah ah

CHILDREN and MISS HONEY Ah!

2 && #+%!/ 8umps up and down with 8oy.

MISS HONEYGo on, Bru%e#! Yea"! Ye ! 3 &he pauses and realizes what she has done, and slowly

lowers her hands. 4 Sorr#, M$ Trun%"8u55 I (ot %arr$ed awa#

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"at6 a55 r$("t, enn# 0e a55 (et %arr$ed awa# o*et$*e E)en *e 3 Looking

irritated, she makes her way to B0 *!5s side. 4 0e55 done, Bo(trotter Good "ow3 &he e-its down the steps and stops behind the first portion of the audience. 4

0e551 Co*e a5on(, Bo(trotter



BRUCE0"at1 0"ere1

MISS TRUNCHBULLO", d$d I not *ent$on1 T"at wa on5# t"e f$r t part of #our pun$ "*ent T"ere6

*ore 9 t"e e%ond part And t"e e%ond part $ C"o+e#!

BRUCE0"at1!

MISS HONEYNo No, M$ Trun%"8u55 &5ea e You %an6t

MISS TRUNCHBULLYe , M$ Trun%"8u55, p5ea e, #ou %an! Do #ou t"$n+ I wou5d a55ow *# e5f to 8e

defeated 8# t"e e *a((ot , do #ou1 0"o do #ou t"$n+ I a*, M$ Hone#1 A wea+5$n(1An $d$ot1 A foo51 You1

MISS HONEYHe6 eaten $t a55 He d$d w"at #ou a +ed

2 && T0 %*#B LL takes B0 *! by the wrist and leads him off the front of the stage.

BRUCEI d$d! I ate t"e 5ot! &5ea e! No! No, not t"ere! Don6t ta+e *e to C"o+e#! &5ea e!

No! No!

MATILDAT"at6 not r$("t!

Lights down.

MATILDA THE MUSICAL

ACT 2

About minutes before the end of intermission, the curtain rises to reveal amicrophone in the middle of the stage. 20 '+02'++3 walks over to it. #e taps it

and it screeches.

MR 0ORM0OODLad$e and (ent5e*en! He# Before we, er, %ont$nue w$t" pro%eed$n( , I wou5d5$+e to offer an apo5o(# for o*e of t"e t"$n( t"at "a)e 8een (o$n( on "ere

ton$("t T"e# are not n$%e t"$n( , and t"e# are not r$("t t"$n( And I wou5d5$+e to tate, (uarantor$%a55#, t"at we wou5d not 5$+e an# %"$5dren w"o *$("t 8e

"ere ton$("t wat%"$n( t"$ to (o "o*e and tr# t"e e t"$n( out for t"e* e5)e

I a*, of %our e, ta5+$n( a8out read$n( 8oo+ Now, $t $ not nor*a5 for +$d to8e"a)e $n t"$ fa "$on It tunt t"e 8ra$n, $t wear out t"e e#e $t *a+e +$du(5#, t$n+#, fatt#, weat# Bett#, 8or$n(, (a eou and %ru%$a55#, $t ($)e

t"e* "ead 5$%e of t"e ou5 Under no %$r%u* tan%e do we %ondone u%" a%t$)$t$e ,and we do o utter5# w$t"out re er)o$r

Now, %an I <u t a +, 8# a wa# of a "ow of "and , "ow *an# (rown7up peop5e "ere"a a%tua55# e)er read a 8oo+1 Co*e on, put e* up

20 '+02'++3 elicits the name of someone from the audience.

MR 0ORM0OODDon6t ta+e t"$ t"e wron( wa#, 8ut Boo+wor*! Boo+wor*! Read$n( a55 t"e 8oo+5$+e a t$n+# 5$tt5e wor* You read 8oo+ , 5$+e a wor* 0or* read 8oo+ You read

8oo+ 0or* are tup$d You6re a 9wur*

T"ere, now 3 audience member5s name 4 w$55 5earn fro* t"at It won6t top 3 him her 4read$n(, 8ut 3 he5ll she5ll 4 ne)er put 3 his her 4 "and up $n a t"eatre a(a$n!

Lad$e and (ent5e*en! Ma# I pre ent to #ou toda# t"e p$nna%5e of our a%"$e)e*ent

a a pe%$e T"e )er# rea on t"at we 8ot"ered e)o5)$n( out of un$%orn $n t"ef$r t p5a%e

A television is brought out by 2 *#A!L, who has a ukulele strung around his back.



MR 0ORM0OOD%omewhere, on a show, I heard

(hat a picture tells a thousand words.%o, telly, if you bothered to take a look,

Is the e)ui"alent of, like . . . lots of books!

!very time the word "telly" is mentioned in the following verses, 2 *#A!L yellsthe word along with his father.

MR 0ORM0OOD All I know, I learnt from telly.(his big beautiful bo5 of facts.If you know a thing already,

Ba8#, #ou %an w$t%" t"e %"anne5 o)er <u t 5$+e t"at

ndless 2oy and endless laughter.;olks li"ing happily e"er after. All you need to make you wise

I twent#7t"ree *$nute p5u ad)ert$ e*ent

hy would we waste our energy (urning the pages, one, two, three*

hen we can sit comfortably,n our lo"ely bumferlies,0at%"$n( peop5e $n($n(, and ta5+$n(, and do$n( tuff1

All I know, I learnt from telly.(he bigger the telly, the smarter the man.

4ou can tell from my big telly 8ust how cle"er of a fellow I am!

Ta+e $t awa#, on

2 *#A!L steps forward, and after some consideration, plucks a note on his ukulele.After a pause, he looks down and plucks another doleful note.

MR 0ORM0OODYou %an6t 5earn t"at fro* a tup$d 8oo+, 3 audience member5s name 4!

All I know, I learnt from telly. hat to think and what to buy.

I was pretty smart already,But now I6* rea55#, rea55# *art, )er# )er# *art

ndless content, endless channels,ndless chat on endless panels.

All you need to fill your muffin, ithout ha"ing to really fink or nuffin.

hy would we waste our energy (rying to work out $ooh$ lysses*

hen we can sit happily on our lo"ely bapperlies0at%"$n( 5$("t5# fa*ou peop5e ta5+$n( to rea55# fa*ou peop5e1

All I know I learnt from telly.(he bigger the telly, the smarter the man.

4ou can tell from my big telly 8ust how cle"er of a fellow I am.

2 *#A!L runs out and grabs a giant trash can. 20 '+02'++3 walks over to a smallbook cart and starts throwing books over his shoulder, and 2 *#A!L catches them in

the trash can.

MR 0ORM0OOD0"o t"e D$%+en $ C"ar5e D$%+en 1 Mar# S"e55e#1 Cor, "e ound *e55#

C"ar5otte Bronte1 Do not want7#! ane Au t$n1 In t"e %o*po t$n6 a*e o#%e1 Hedoe n6t ound no$%e Ewen M%Ewan1 U(", I fee5 5$+e pew$n6 0$55$a* S"a+e peare1

S%"w$55$a* S%"*a+e peare Mo8# D$%+1 3 #e titters. 4 Ea #, (rand*a!

All together, now! All I know, I learnt from telly!

(he bigger the telly, the smarter the man.



4ou can tell from my big telly hat a "ery cle"er fellow I am.

T"an+ #ou )er# *u%"

&ome of the *# L30!% come on stage to take away the props. LA6!%3!0 walks up tothe microphone as though to take it away, but after making sure no one is looking,

she pulls it down to her level and starts speaking into it.

LA'ENDERHe55o I6* La)ender, 8# t"e wa# Mat$5da6 8e t fr$end! T"ere6 a 8$t %o*$n( upt"at6 a55 a8out 9 *e! 0e55, not e;a%t5# a8out *e But I p5a# a 8$( part $n $t

But I6* not (o$n( to a# w"at "appen , 8e%au e I don6t want to po$5 $t for #ou3 &he starts walking off the stage with the microphone, then stops. 4

A55 r$("t Loo+ 0"at I do $ I )o5unteer to ($)e t"e Trun%"8u55 a <u( of waterAnd on t"e wa# 8a%+ No! I don6t want to te55 #ou an#*ore 8e%au e I don6t

want to ru$n $t!3&he walks off stage. After a moment, she runs back on. 4

0e55 On t"e wa# 8a%+, I f$nd a newt A newt $ 5$+e a rea55# u(5# 5$ ardt"at 5$)e $n water And o I p$%+ $t up and No! I6* not a#$n( an# *ore!

3 &he raises her fists and growls, then huffs off. Before she can make it offstage, she turns around. 4

I6* (o$n( to put t"e newt $n t"e Trun%"8u556 <u(! It6 (o$n( to 8e 8r$55$ant!

LA6!%3!0 runs out and the stage darkens as the !ntr5acte plays. 'hen lights go upagain, there are four swings hanging from the rafters. B0 *! and T+22/ sit on two

of them. B0 *! is wearin a sign that says " have been to *#+9!/." As thefollowing song progresses, various *# L30!% and then B 1 9 3& come down a slide at

the back of the stage and take turns on the swings.

BRUCE hen I grow up,

I will be tall enough to reach the branches(hat I need to reach to climb

(he trees you get to climb hen you're grown up.

BRUCE and TOMMY And when I grow up,

I will be smart enough to answer all(he )uestions that you need to know

(he answers toBefore you're grown up.

AMANDA and ERIC And when I grow up,

I will eat sweets e"ery day,n the way to work,

And I will go to bed late e"ery night.

And I will wake up hen the sun comes up,

And I will watch cartoons until my eyes go s)uare +CHILDREN

– And I won't care'1ause I'll be all grown up.

hen I grow up . . .

hen I grow up,9 hen I grow up, when I grow up:I will be strong enough to carry all(he hea"y things you ha"e to haul

Around with you hen you're a grown up

And when I grow up,9 hen I grow up, when I grow up:I will be bra"e enough to fight the creatures

(hat you ha"e to fight



Beneath the bed each night(o be a grown up.

BIG ?IDS And when I grow up,

I will ha"e treats e"ery day, And I'll play with things that mum pretends

(hat mums don't think are fun.


And I will spend all day 2ust lying in the sun, And I won't burn

'1ause I'll be all grown up . . . hen I grow up . . .

The *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& recline in various parts of the stage. 2 && #+%!/ comesup the stairs by the side of the stage and sits down on a swing. 2AT L3A enters

shortly after from the other side of the stage.

MISS HONEY hen I grow up,

I will be bra"e enough to fight the creatures(hat you ha"e to fight

Beneath the bed each night(o be a grown up.

hen I grow up . . .

The *# L30!% and B 1 9 3& start to dissipate.

MATILDA8ust because you find that life's not fair, it


Nothing will change.

The swings rise into the air and the scene behind them slowly changes to thelibrary.

MISS HONEY hen I grow up . . .

3 &he starts walking off stage. 4

MATILDA8ust because I find myself in this story,

It doesn't mean that e"erything is written for me.If I think the ending is fi5ed already,

I might as well be sayingI think that it's okay, And that's not right!

MRS &HEL&S

Mat$5da, "ow 5o)e5# to ee #ou Are #ou en<o#$n( %"oo51MATILDA

O", #e B$t of $t, an#wa# Mr &"e5p ! 0"ere6 t"e RE'ENGE e%t$on1

MRS &HEL&S0"at1! 0e55, we don6t "a)e a :re)en(e: e%t$on 0"#1 I t"ere a %"$5d at %"oo5

w"o $ 8e"a)$n( 5$+e a 8u55#1

MATILDAO", no Not a child , e;a%t5#

MRS &HEL&SMat$5da, are #ou ure o*et"$n( 9

MATILDA

You want to "ear t"e ne;t part of *# tor#1MRS &HEL&S

Stor#1 D$d #ou a# : tor#:1 D$d #ou a# Mat$5da! 0"at are we wa$t$n( for1



Behind 2AT L3A and 20& $#!L$&, the library stacks split apart. T+22/ and #+0T!%& Alead the A*0+BAT and !&*A$+L+1 &T onto the stage, carrying flames. The A*0+BAT5s

hair has dynamite in it. As 2AT L3A narrates, the !&*A$+L+1 &T and A*0+BAT act outthe scene.

MATILDAS5ow5#, )er# 5ow5#, t"e A%ro8at wrapped "er "$n# w"$te %arf around "er

"u 8and6 ne%+

MATILDA AND ACROBAT:=or 5u%+, *# 5o)e 9 :

MATILDA9 "e a$d, +$ $n( "$* w$t" t"e (ent5e t of +$ e

MATILDA and ACROBAT:S*$5e 0e "a)e done t"$ a t"ou and t$*e :

MATILDABut udden5#, "e "u((ed "$* w$t" t"e 8$((e t "u( $n t"e wor5d, o "ard t"at "e

t"ou("t "e wou5d "u( a55 t"e a$r out of "$* And o, t"e# prepared t"e* e5)e fort"e *o t dan(erou feat t"at "ad e)er 8een perfor*ed

The !&*A$+L+1 &T and the A*0+BAT take each others hands and walk back out of the

stage.MATILDA

T"e (reat e %apo5o($ t "ad to e %ape fro* t"e %a(e, 5ean out, %at%" "$ w$fe w$t"one "and, (ra8 a f$re e;t$n(u$ "er w$t" t"e ot"er, and put out t"e f5a*e on "er

pe%$a55#7de $(ned dre w$t"$n twe5)e e%ond 8efore t"e# rea%"ed t"e d#na*$teand 85ew "$ w$fe6 "ead off!

20& $#!L$& screams in terror. 2AT L3A stares at her (uestioningly.

MRS &HEL&SSorr#, (o on

2AT L3A beckons 20& $#!L$& to sit on the floor with her. A white sheet covers theback of the stage and silhouettes act out 2AT L3A5s story upon it.

MATILDAT"e tr$%+ tarted we55 T"e *o*ent t"e pe%$a55#7de $(ned dre wa et a5$("t,

t"e a%ro8at wun( $nto t"e a$r T"e %rowd "e5d t"e$r 8reat" a "e "ur5ed o)er t"e"ar+ and p$+# o8<e%t One e%ond Two e%ond T"e# wat%"ed a t"e f5a*e

%rept up t"e dre T"ree e%ond =our e%ond S"e 8e(an to rea%" out "er ar*toward t"e %a(e =$)e e%ond S$; e%ond ! Sudden5#, t"e pad5o%+ p$n(ed open,

and t"e "u(e %"a$n fe55 awa# Se)en e%ond E$("t e%ond T"e door f5un( open,and t"e e %apo5o($ t rea%"ed out one "u(e, *u %5ed ar* to %at%" "$ w$fe and t"e$r

%"$5d N$ne e%ond ! Ten e%ond !

MRS &HEL&SO", I %an6t 5oo+!

MATILDA

E5e)en e%ond ! And "e (ra8 "er "and, and and and udden5#, t"ef5a*e are %o)ered $n foa* 8efore t"e# %an 8ot" 8e 85own to p$e%e

MRS &HEL&SHoora#! So t"e tor# doe "a)e a "app# end$n( after a55

MATILDANo

MRS &HEL&SNo1

MATILDANo Ma#8e $t wa t"e t"ou("t of t"e %"$5d Ma#8e $t wa ner)e But t"e

e %apo5o($ t u ed <u t a tou%" too *u%" foa* And udden5#, t"e$r "and 8e%a*e

5$pp#, and "e fe55MRS &HEL&S

No 0a 0a "e o+a#1 D$d D$d "e ur)$)e1



The sheet parts and the !&*A$+L+1 &T walks slowly forward, carrying the A*0+BAT inhis arms.

MATILDAS"e 8ro+e e)er# 8one $n "er 8od# E;%ept for t"e one at t"e end of "er 5$tt5ef$n(er S"e d$d *ana(e to 5$)e 5on( enou(" to "a)e t"e$r %"$5d, 8ut t"e effort

wa too (reat :Lo)e our 5$tt5e ($r5,: "e a$d :Lo)e our dau("ter w$t" a55 #our"eart S"e wa a55 we e)er wanted :

The !&*A$+L+1 &T carries the A*0+BAT off the front of the stage.

ACROBAT6S 'OICELo)e our ($r5 w$t" e)er#t"$n( S"e $ e)er#t"$n(

MATILDAAnd t"en, "e d$ed

20& $#!L$& walks over to a cart of books, blowing her nose into a handkerchief.

MATILDAAnd t"en, t"$n( (ot wor e

20& $#!L$& collapses against the cart.

MRS &HEL&S0"at1 :0or e:1 O", no, Mat$5da Not wor e T"e# %an6t (et wor e

MATILDAI6* afra$d t"e# d$d Be%au e t"e e %apo5o($ t wa o +$nd t"at "e ne)er for onee%ond 85a*ed t"e e)$5 $ ter for w"at "appened In fa%t, "e a +ed "er to *o)e $nand "e5p 5oo+ after "$ dau("ter S"e wa not"$n( 8ut rude to t"e 5$tt5e ($r5,

*a+$n( "er wa ", $ron, %oo+, and %5ean, and 8eat$n( "er $f "e d$d a t"$n( wron(But a5wa# $n e%ret, o t"at t"e e %apo5o($ t ne)er u pe%ted a t"$n( And o t"e

poor 5$tt5e ($r5 (rew up w$t" t"e *eane t, %rue5e t, "orr$85e7e t aunt #ou %anpo $85e $*a($ne!

MRS &HEL&SLet6 %a55 t"e po5$%e!!

MATILDAMr &"e5p ! It6 It6 <u t a tor#

MRS &HEL&S0"at1 O" O", #e Of %our e Mat$5da, #ou are o *art Your parent *u t t"$n+

t"e# "a)e won t"e 5otter# "a)$n( a %"$5d 5$+e #ou

MATILDAO", #ea" Yea", t"e# do T"e#6re a5wa# a#$n( t"at, $n fa%t T"e# a#, :Mat$5da,

we6re o proud of #ou You6re 5$+e w$nn$n( t"e 5otter# : Yea", I6d 8etter(o

20& $#!L$& e-its and the book shelves part. The scene changes to the 'ormwood5sliving room. 20 '+02'++3 enters, dancing.

MR 0ORM0OOD

3 to the tune of "Telly" 4 I6* o %5e)er, I6* o %5e)er I6* o )er#, )er#, )er#,)er# %5e)er I6* o )er#, f5a*$n( %5e)er 0"at a )er# %5e)er fe55ow I a*! 3 to 20&

'+02'++3 4 Co*e, "ere #ou! 3 #e dances with her, twirling her around. 4

MRS 0ORM0OODNo, top, top T"ere6 on5# one *an I do that w$t"!

MR 0ORM0OODE)er#one, (at"er around I want *# fa*$5# to "are $n *# tr$u*p" Not #ou, 8o#

MATILDAI6* a ($r5!

MR 0ORM0OODOne "undred and f$ft#7f$)e o5d 8an(er on *# "and A55 po5$ "ed up, 8ut t"e

*$5ea(e on t"e %ar te55$n( t"e trut"/ t"at ea%" one wa +na%+ered How %ou5d Ipo $85# *a+e t"e *$5ea(e (o 8a%+1 I %ou5dn6t )er# we55 dr$)e ea%" one 8a%+ward ,%ou5d I1

MICHAEL



Ba%+ward

MR 0ORM0OOD0"en udden5#, I "ad t"e *o t (en$u $dea $n t"e wor5d I run $nto t"e wor+ "op I(ra8 a dr$55 And u $n( *# $n%red$85e *$nd, I atta%" t"e dr$55 to t"e peedo*eter

of t"e f$r t %ar I turned $t on I w"a%+ed $t $nto re)er e

MICHAELBa%+ward !

20 '+02'++3 gives 2 *#A!L a high five.

MR 0ORM0OODYe , 8o#! Ba%+ward ! Ba%+ward E;a%t5# Now, a dr$556 *otor/ It ro55 8a%+wardt"ou and of t$*e a e%ond And w$t"$n a few *$nute , I "ad redu%ed t"e *$5ea(e

on t"at o5d ru t78u%+et to pra%t$%a55# not"$n( I d$d $t to e)er# $n(5e %ar!

MICHAELBa%+ward !

MRS 0ORM0OODStop ta5+$n( now, dar5$n( T"ere6 a (ood 8o#

MR 0ORM0OODTen *$nute 5ater, t"e Ru $an "ow up Great, 8$(, na t#7fa%ed ape E;pen $)e

u$t , dar+ (5a e dunno w"o t"e# t"ou("t t"e# were

MRS 0ORM0OODO"! Ru $an are no%turna5 I aw $t on a pro(ra**e 5a t n$("t

MATILDAT"at wa 8ad(er It wa a pro(ra**e a8out 8ad(er

MRS 0ORM0OODSa*e t"$n(! And d$d $t wor+1

20 '+02'++3 shows her a suitcase full of money. 20& '+02'++3 screams.

MRS 0ORM0OOD=anta t$%o! Now I %an afford Rudo5p"o a55 da# 5on(!

MATILDABut #ou %"eated t"e*! T"at6 not fa$r at a55 T"e#6)e tru ted #ou, and #ou6)e

%"eated t"e*

MRS 0ORM0OOD0"at $ t"e matter w$t" #ou1 0"at6)e we done to de er)e a %"$5d 5$+e #ou1

20 '+02'++3 throws down the suitcase. Behind him, the scene changes to 2AT L3A5sbedroom.

MR 0ORM0OODYou +now w"at I6* (o$n( to do to*orrow1 I6* (o$n( to (o down to t"at 5$8rar# and

te55 t"at o5d 8a( t"at #ou6re ne)er to 8e 5et $n a(a$n

MATILDA0"at1 No! &5ea e don6t!

MR 0ORM0OODAnd $f "e doe , I w$55 "a)e "er f$red! And #ou w$55 ne)er read anot"er t$n+$n(

8oo+ a 5on( a #ou 5$)e I w$55 put an end to #our tor$e , #oun( *an 3 #e drags2AT L3A by the wrist and throws her through the door to her room onto her bed. 4

Now, (et $n t"ere and ta# $n t"ere, #ou na t# 5$tt5e %reep!

20 '+02'++3 slams the door and leaves. 2AT L3A lies face7down on her bed. &hebrings her fist down three times to great thundering sounds. &lowly, she looks up.

MATILDAAt n$("t, t"e e %apo5o($ t6 dau("ter %r$ed "er e5f to 5eep, a5one $n "er roo*S"e ne)er a$d a $n(5e word a8out t"e e)$5 aunt6 8u55#$n(, 8e%au e "e d$dn6twant to %au e a fu , and o "e uffered $n $5en%e T"$ on5# en%oura(ed t"e

wo*an to (reater %rue5t$e , unt$5 one da#, "e e;p5oded!MATILDA and ACROBAT6S SISTER 3 off stage 4

:You are a u e5e ! =$5t"#! Na t# 5$tt5e %reep!:



MATILDAAnd "e 8eat "er, t"rew "er $nto a dan+, dar+, du t# %e55ar, 5o%+ed t"e door, and

went out

2AT L3A has thrown herself onto the ground. &he holds her head. The sound of a car pulling up to a house is heard.

MATILDABut t"at da#, t"e e %apo5o($ t "appened to %o*e "o*e ear5# And w"en "e "eard t"eound of "$ dau("ter6 tear 9 3 &he knocks on the door three times. 4 9 "e *a "ed

t"e door open!

The !&*A$+L+1 &T, wearing the white scarf, smashes the door open to lightning andthunder, and takes 2AT L3A into his arms.

ESCA&OLOGIST0on't cry.

I am here, little girl.lease don't cry.0ry your eyes.

ipe away your tears, little girl.

;orgi"e me.I didn't mean to desert you.

0on't cry, little girl.Nothing can hurt you.

4ou'"e nothing to fear.I'm here.

MATILDA and ESCA&OLOGIST:Ha)e I 8een o wrapped up $n *# (r$ef for *# w$fe t"at I "a)e for(otten t"e one

t"$n( t"at *atter to u *o t1 I 5o)e #ou o *u%", *# dau("ter I "a55 pend t"ere t of *# 5$fe *a+$n( $t up to #ou :

The !&*A$+L+1 &T wraps the scarf around 2AT L3A5s shoulders.

MATILDA and ESCA&OLOGIST:0e "a55 8e to(et"er, fore)er :

MATILDA0on't cry, daddy.

I'm all right, daddy.lease don't cry.

#ere, let me wipe away your tears.

ESCA&OLOGIST;orgi"e me.

MATILDA0addy, forgi"e me.

ESCA&OLOGISTI didn't mean to desert you.

MATILDAI didn't want to upset you.

lease, daddy, don't cry.

ESCA&OLOGIST0on't cry, little girl.

MATILDAI'll be all right.

ESCA&OLOGISTNothing can hurt you.

MATILDA ith you by my side,

I ha"e +MATILDA and ESCA&OLOGIST

– nothing to fear.



MATILDA 3 simultaneously 4/ 4ou're here.ESCA&OLOGIST 3 simultaneously 4/ I'm here.

The !&*A$+L+1 &T carries 2AT L3A to her bed and brings up the sheet. 2AT L3A rollsout the other side of the bed as the shape of a little girl rises from beneath the

covers.

MATILDABut w"en t"e 5$tt5e ($r5 fe55 a 5eep, t"e e %apo5o($ t6 t"ou("t turned to t"e

a%ro8at6 $ ter, and an a5*$("t# ra(e (rew $n $de "$ (reat "eart

MATILDA and ESCA&OLOGIST:T"$ de*on! T"$ )$55a$n! T"$ *on ter! S"e "a u55$ed t"e *e*or# of *# w$feS"e "a 8etra#ed t"e tru t of "er own $ ter S"e "a "own %rue5t# to t"e *o t

pre%$ou rea5$t# of *# *arr$a(e Bu55#$n( %"$5dren $ "er (a*e, $ $t1 0e55, 5etu ee w"at t"$ %reature t"$n+ "e %an do w"en t"e wrat" of a (rown *an tand

8efore "er!:

To thunder and lightning, the !&*A$+L+1 &T runs to the bedroom door, which isretreating into the background.

MATILDABut t"at wa t"e 5a t t"e 5$tt5e ($r5 e)er aw of "er fat"er Be%au e "e ne)er

%a*e "o*e e)er a(a$n2 && #+%!/ enters holding a stack of books tied together.

MISS HONEYMat$5da1 I6)e (ot t"o e 8oo+ we po+e a8out, o #ou %an <u t $t and read 9

2 && T0 %*#B LL starts blowing her whistle from off stage, then runs toward 2 &&#+%!/ and 2AT L3A. &he is wearing a short skirt and a 8umper. B0 *! scurries

behind her, carrying a chair and wearing his " have been to *#+9!/" sign. 2 &&T0 %*#B LL blows the whistle in 2 && #+%!/5s face.

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at are #ou do$n( w$t" t"o e 8oo+ , wo*an1

MISS HONEY

3 tearfully 4 T"e#6re T"e#6re for Mat$5da!MISS TRUNCHBULL

No, t"e# are not 3 &he grabs the books from 2 && #+%!/5s hands. 4 Not on *# wat%"!3 &he walks to stage left and shotputs the books into the wings, to the sound of

breaking glass. 4 T"ere $ an a(e for read$n( and an a(e for 8e$n( a f$5t"# 5$tt5etoad! T"e e are toad Aren6t #ou, Bo(trotter1

BRUCEYe , M$ Trun%"8u55

MISS TRUNCHBULLYe , M$ Trun%"8u55! 3 &he takes the chair from B0 *! and brings it to the frontcorner of the stage. 4 On5#, Bo(trotter, "ere, $ now a (ood toad 3 &he slams the

chair down. 4 S$t!

2 && #+%!/ sits in the chair. uietly, 2AT L3A approaches B0 *! to see if he isall right.

MISS TRUNCHBULLIt "a 8e%o*e %5ear to *e, M$ Hone#, t"at #ou "a)e no $dea w"at #ou are do$n(

You 8e5$e)e $n +$ndne , and f5uff$ne , and 8oo+ , and tor$e T"$ $ nottea%"$n(! To tea%" t"e %"$5d, #ou *u t f$r t 8rea+ t"e %"$5d 3 &he blows her

whistle and the *# L30!%, in gym uniforms, trot onto the stage and form a linewith their hands on their heads. 4 @u$et, #ou *a((ot !

MISS HONEYNo one wa pea+$n(, M$ Trun%"8u55

MISS TRUNCHBULL

M$ Hone#, p5ea e under tand t"at w"en I a# :@u$et, #ou *a((ot ,: #ou areent$re5# $n%5uded $n t"at tate*ent 0"ere $ *# <u( of water1

LA6!%3!0 starts 8umping up and down.



LA'ENDEROo", oo"! Me, *e, *e, *e, *e! I655 (et $t, M$ Trun%"8u55! 3 &he runs to the front

of the stage, gives two thumbs up to the entire theatre, then runs off. 2AT L3A,in gym uniform, 8oins the others in line. 4

MISS TRUNCHBULLStup$d ($r5 And #ou 3 &he goes down the line of *# L30!%. 4 =5a88#, d$ (u t$n(,

re)o5t$n(! Re)o5t$n(, I a#! It6 "$(" t$*e #ou were tou("ened up w$t" a

5$tt5e p"# 7ed 3 &he blows her whistle and the children rush to arrange gymmats on the floor. !0 * has a little trouble pulling his out. 4

MISS TRUNCHBULL(his school, of late, has started reeking +

AMANDA3 (uietly 4 Er$%

MISS TRUNCHBULL3 to A2A%3A 4 @u$et, *a((ot , w"en I6* pea+$n(!

!0 * throws himself flat on his mat.

MISS TRUNCHBULL – reeking, with a most disturbing scent.

nly the finest nostrils smell it,But I know it oh too well.It is the odour of rebellion.It's the bou)uet of dissent!

And you may bet your britches this #eadmistress;inds this foul odiferousness

holly olfactorally insulting. And so, to stop this stench's spread,

I find a session of phys ed%orts the merely $rank$ from the $re"oting$.

3 &he takes off her 8umper to reveal a top with the +lympic logo emblazoned on it.&he starts e-ercising and the children follow suit. 4

(he smell of rebellion comes out in the sweat, And phys ed will get you sweating. And it won't be long before I smell the pong

f aiding and abetting. A bit of phys ed will tell us

ho has a head full of rebellious thoughts.3 &he stands on one leg and the children follow. 4

Ho5d, "o5d!

2ost of the children fall to the ground, but 2 && T0 %*#B LL sees that 2AT L3A isstill standing.

MISS TRUNCHBULL8ust like a rotten egg floats to the top

f a bucket of water.

0ealising what she has done, 2AT L3A slowly lowers herself onto her mat.

MISS TRUNCHBULL(he smell of rebellion.(he stench of re"olt.

CHILDRENne, two, three, four.

MISS TRUNCHBULL(he reek of insubordination.

CHILDRENI can't take it anymore.

ne, two, three, four.MISS TRUNCHBULL

(he whiff of resistance.(he pong of dissent.



(he funk of mutiny in action.

MATILDA(hat's not right.

MISS TRUNCHBULLBefore the weed becomes too big and greedy,

4ou really need to nip it in the bud.&o $t$on two!

3 &he takes an inhaler from #+0T!%& A and throws it into the wings. 4Before the worm starts to turn, 4ou must scrape off the dirt

And rip it from the mud!

(he whiff of insurgence.

CHILDRENne, two three, four.

MISS TRUNCHBULL(he stench of intent.


MISS TRUNCHBULL(he reek of pre pubescent protest.

(he pong of defiance.


MISS TRUNCHBULL(he odour of coup.


MISS TRUNCHBULL(he waft of anarchy in progress.

ERIC&5ea e, *$ , p5ea e!

MISS TRUNCHBULLnce we'"e $e5ercised$ these demons,

(hey shall be too pooped for scheming.

2 && T0 %*#B LL drags off a mat to which !0 * still clings. The +L3!0 9 3& bringin a tall ladder, a trampoline, a gymnastic platform, and a mattress.

MISS TRUNCHBULL%ome double time discipline

%hould stop the rot from setting in!3 &he climbs onto the ladder. 4

A55 r$("t, 5et6 tep $t up Dou85e t$*eAs 2 && T0 %*#B LL sings, each of the *# L30!% 8ump onto the trampoline, land on

the platform, and fall onto the mattress. &ome miss their landing. &ome are pushed, sometimes unintentionally, by their classmates.

MISS TRUNCHBULLOne, two, t"ree, four

0iscipline. 0iscipline.;or children who aren't listeningF

;or midgets who are fidgetingr whispering in history.

(heir chattering and chittering,(heir nattering and twittering

Is tempered with a smatteringf discipline.

e must begin insistingn rigidity, and discipline,



ersistently resisting(his anarchistic mischie"ing.

(hese minutes you are fritteringn pandering and pitying

hile little 'uns like this-(hey 2ust want discipline.

(he simpering and whimpering,

(he dribbling and the spittling,(he $miss, I need a tissue$ +It's an issue we can fi5.

(here is no mystery to mastering(he art of classroom discipline.

It's discipline, discipline +

CHILDREND$ %$p5$ne!

MISS TRUNCHBULL(he smell of rebellion,(he stench of re"olt,

(he reek of pre pubescent plotting.(he whiff of resistance,

(he pong of dissent,(he funk of moral fibre rotting . . .

2 && T0 %*#B LL climbs down the ladder and into the wings with a flourish. &heruns headlong onto the stage, 8umps on the trampoline, and flies over the wooden

platform onto the mattress, flipping head over heels. &he then takes up a positionsitting on the mattress.

MISS TRUNCHBULLImagine a world with no children.

1lose your eyes and 2ust dream.Imagine + come on, try it +

(he peace and the )uiet. A burbling stream.

3 &he stands and 8umps into a sitting position on the wooden platform. 4Now imagine a woods with a cottage,

And inside that cottage we find A dwarf called Geek,

A carni"al freak ho can fold paper hats with his mind.

And he says,$0on't let them steal your horses.

No!0on't let them throw them away.

No, no, no!If you find your way through,

(hey'll be waiting for you, singing,:Ne$("! Ne$("!:

3&he whickers like a horse. 4

ERICS"e6 *ad!

MISS TRUNCHBULLA"a!

And t"ere, <u t 5$+e I a$d/T"e t$n+$n( *a((ot rear "$ "ead!

"en the s)uitiest, pitiest mess1an harbour seeds of stinkiness.

#a"e you e"er seen anything more repellent*#a"e you e"er smelled anything worse than

(hat smell of rebellion*2 && T0 %*#B LL takes up a lounging position on the wooden platform. t is slowly

pulled across the stage as she languorously brings her leg up and down. The



*# L30!% stand in front of it and make rowing motions with their arms as it makesits way across the stage. The ne-t two verses overlap.

3MISS TRUNCHBULL(he stench of re"olt.

(he reek of insubordination.(he whiff of resistance.

(he pong of dissent.

CHILDREN0iscipline. 0iscipline.No more whispering.

1hildren need discipline.1ut out that whispering.

If you're mischiefing,%he'll sniff you out. ithout a doubt,

%he's a snout in a million.0iscipline. 0iscipline.No more whispering.

1hildren need discipline.1ut out that whispering .4

MISS TRUNCHBULL And I will not stop till you are s)uashedF

(ill this rebellion is )uashedF(ill glorious, sweaty discipline has washed

(his sickening stench + away!3 &he grabs the end of a net that is pulled back across the stage with the wooden

block as she stands on top of it. pon the net is the word "3 &* $L %!". 4

LA6!%3!0 runs on the stage with a 8ug of water, a cup, and a wriggling newt.

LA'ENDERLoo+! T"e newt! Can #ou ee1 It6 t"e newt! I6)e (ot t"e newt! I6* (o$n( to 9

MISS TRUNCHBULL

@u$et!LA6!%3!0 drops the newt into the water.

MISS HONEYI don6t t"$n+ t"$ $ :tea%"$n(: at a55 I t"$n+ $t6 <u t %rue5t#

2 && T0 %*#B LL takes the 8ug and cup from LA6!%3!0.

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"at $ 8e%au e #ou, M$ Hone#, are pat"et$% 3 &he takes a drink of water. 4 Youare wet You are wea+ 3 &he takes another drink. 4 You are, $n fa%t, a n$)e55$n(

5$tt5e 9

There is the sound of something dropping into her glass.

MISS TRUNCHBULL9 newt Newt!

2 && T0 %*#B LL puts the cup and 8ug down on the platform and scurries away fromit. The children, e-cept for !0 *, gather around, chatting e-citedly.

MISS TRUNCHBULLNewt! T"ere6 a newt $n $de *# 9

MISS HONEY@u$et, %"$5dren, p5ea e! @u$et!

MISS TRUNCHBULL3 to !0 * 4 You!

ERICNo, not *e! 0"at1 No! I d$dn6t!

MISS TRUNCHBULLYou d$d t"$ , #ou )$5e, repu5 $)e, *a5$%$ou 5$tt5e $nner! 3 &he takes !0 * by one



ear and drags him to one side. 4

ERICStop! Stop!

MISS TRUNCHBULL:Stop:1 :Stop:1 0e were <u t (ett$n( tarted!

MISS HONEY

No, M$ Trun%"8u55, don6t, p5ea e You655 pu55 "$ ear off!MISS TRUNCHBULL

I "a)e d$ %o)ered, M$ Hone#, t"rou(" *an# #ear of e;per$*entat$on, t"at t"eear of *a55 8o# do not %o*e off T"e# tret%" In fa%t, I t"$n+ I %an fee5

t"e e one tret%"$n( e)en now

2 && T0 %*#B LL grabs both of !0 *5s ears and stretch them out several inches tothe side.

ERICOw! Ow!

MISS HONEYNo, M$ Trun%"8u55, no!

MATILDALea)e "$* a5one! You 8$(, fat, 8u55#!

MISS TRUNCHBULLHow dare #ou You are not f$t to 8e at t"$ %"oo5 You ou("t to 8e $n pr$ on! Int"e deepe t, dan+e t, dar+e t pr$ on! I "a55 "a)e #ou w"ee5ed out, trapped to a

tro55e# w$t" a *u 5e o)er #our *out"!

2 && T0 %*#B LL starts to rant and scream at the children, lumbering all over thestage. 2AT L3A stands near the front of the stage, looking anguished.

MISS TRUNCHBULLI "a55 %ru " #ou I "a55 pound #ou I "a55 d$ e%t #ou, *ada*! I "a55 trap

#ou to a ta85e and perfor* e;per$*ent on #ou! A55 of t"e e d$ (u t$n( 5$tt5e5u( "a55 uffer t"e *o t appa55$n( $nd$(n$t$e 8e%au e of #ou Ye , #ou! I"a55 feed #ou to t"e ter*$te And t"en I "a55 *a " t"e ter*$te $nto t$n#

fra(*ent

2 && T0 %*#B LL5s words fade into the background, though she continues to rail insilence at the *# L30!% and 2 && #+%!/, who cower at the back of the stage.

2AT L3A stands on one block of the stage, which slowly rises.

MATILDA#a"e you e"er wondered

9well, I ha"e: About how when I say, say, $red$

9for e5ample:(here's no way of knowing

If red means the same thing in your head

As red means in my head hen someone says $red$.

And how, if we are tra"elling at Almost the speed of light, And we're holding a light,

(hat light would still tra"el away from us At the full speed of light.

hich seems right,In a way,

But I'm trying to say +

I'm not sure,But I wonder if inside my head,

I'm not 2ust a bit different from%ome of my friends.(hese answers that come into my mind, unbiddenF

(hese stories deli"ered to me fully written.



And when e"eryone shouts9like they seem to like shouting:

(he noise in my head is incredibly loud. And I 2ust wish they'd stop,

My dad and my mum, And the telly,

And stories would stop for 2ust once.

And I'm sorry,But I'm not )uite e5plaining it right.But this noise becomes anger,

And the anger is light. And this burning inside me would usually fade,

But it isn't today. And the heat and the shouting +

And my heart is pounding + And my eyes are burning +

And suddenly, e"erything, e"erything is +

6uiet./ike silence, but not really silent.

8ust that still sort of

6uiet./ike the sound of a page being turned in a book.

r a pause in a walk in the woods.

6uiet./ike silence, but not really silent.

8ust that nice kind of 6uiet.

/ike the sound when you lie upside down in your bed.8ust the sound of your heart in your head.

And though the people around me +(heir mouths are still mo"ing +

(he words they are forming

1annot reach me anymore. And it is )uiet.

And I am warm./ike I'"e sailed +

Into the eye of the storm.

)rom across the stage, 2AT L3A focuses her attention on the cup of water that 2 &&T0 %*#B LL is standing near.

MATILDAT$p! Go on, t$p! T$p o)er! T$p o)er!

The cup tips over toward 2 && T0 %*#B LL. As she turns around, you can see thatthere is a newt on the back of her leg.

MISS TRUNCHBULL9 *$ era85e %o55e%t$on of e;%u e for %"$5dren, and #ou, *ada*, tand$n( t"ere5$+e t"e >u$t of >u$t , are $t 8eat$n( "eart! But I a* a *at%" for #ou And Ite55 #ou, t"ere $ not"$n( I "a55 not do, no 5en(t" to w"$%" I "a55 not (o, no

pun$ "*ent I "a55 not $nf5$%t, no ear I "a55 not tret%" 3 &he trailsoff. 4 0"at $ $t1 0"at $ $t1 T"ere6 o*et"$n( on *e Get $t off *e! Get $t off*e! It6 "ead$n( nort"! 3 &he pauses in horror. 4 I6)e (ot a newt $n *# +n$%+er !

I6)e (ot a newt $n *# +n$%+er ! 3 &he runs off stage. 4

There is a pause.

MISS HONEY0e55 T"at wa $ntere t$n( I t"$n+ we a55 8etter (o "o*e w"$5e we t$55 %an

The *# L30!% cheer and run off.

MISS HONEYMat$5da1

MATILDA



0at%"

MISS HONEYMat$5da, I rea55# t"$n+ $t wou5d 8e w$ e 9

MATILDA0at%" &5ea e

2AT L3A sets up the cup again and focuses her attention on it. t sways from side

to side and then tips over.MATILDA

I *o)ed $t w$t" *# e#e A* I tran(e1

MISS HONEYI t"$n+ I t"$n+ How do #ou fan%# a n$%e %up of tea1

2 && #+%!/ puts 2AT L3A5s school blazer back on her and buttons it. 6ery slowly,the platform of 2 && #+%!/5s house starts to roll in from the back of the stage.

MATILDA0"at do #ou t"$n+ $t $ 1 T"$ t"$n( w$t" *# e#e

MISS HONEY0e55, I6* not (o$n( to pretend I +now w"at $t $ , Mat$5da But I don6t 8e5$e)e

$t6 o*et"$n( #ou "ou5d 8e fr$("tened of I t"$n+ $t6 o*et"$n( to do w$t" t"at$n%red$85e *$nd of #our

MATILDAYou *ean, t"ere6 no roo* $n *# "ead for a55 of *# 8ra$n , o t"e# "a)e to >u$ "

out t"rou(" *# e#e

MISS HONEY0e55, not e;a%t5#, 8ut, er So*et"$n( 5$+e t"at You %erta$n5# are a pe%$a5

($r5, Mat$5da I I *et #our *ot"er S"e6 unu ua5 0"at a8out #ourfat"er1 I "e I "e proud to "a)e a dau("ter a %5e)er a #ou1

MATILDAO", #ea" He6 )er# proud He6 )er#, )er#, )er# proud He6 a5wa# a#$n(,

:Mat$5da, I6* o proud to "a)e a dau("ter a 9 : 3 &he pauses and looks at 2 &&#+%!/. 4 T"at6 not true, M$ Hone# T"at6 not w"at "e a# He6 not proud at

a55 He %a55 *e a 5$ar, and a %"eat, and a na t# 5$tt5e %reep

MISS HONEYI ee 3&he leads 2AT L3A up onto the platform of her house. 4 Here we are Ho*e

weet "o*e

2AT L3A looks around.

MATILDAAre #ou poor1

MISS HONEYEr, #e Ye , I a* 'er#!

MATILDADon6t t"e# pa# tea%"er )er# we551

MISS HONEYNo, t"e# don6t, a%tua55#, 8ut, er, I6* e)en poorer t"an *o t, 8e%au e of, er,

ot"er rea on You ee, I I u ed to 5$)e w$t" *# aunt But one da# I wa outwa5+$n(, and I I %a*e a%ro t"$ o5d "ed I fe55 %o*p5ete5# $n 5o)e w$t"$t I ran to t"e far*er and 8e((ed "$* to 5et *e *o)e $n He t"ou("t I wa *ad

But "e a(reed, and I6)e 5$)ed "ere e)er $n%e

MATILDABut M$ Hone#, #ou %an6t 5$)e $n a "ed!

MISS HONEYI6* not tron( 5$+e #ou, Mat$5da You ee, *# fat"er d$ed w"en I wa #oun( Ma(nu

wa "$ na*e He wa )er# +$nd But, er, w"en "e wa (one, *# aunt 8e%a*e *# 5e(a5(uard$an S"e wa *ean and %rue5 and "orr$85e 5$+e #ou %an "ard5# $*a($ne Andw"en I (ot *# <o8 a a tea%"er, "e udden5# pre ented *e w$t" a 8$55 for 5oo+$n(

after *e a55 t"o e #ear S"e "ad wr$tten e)er#t"$n( down/ E)er# tea 8a(, e)er#



e5e%tr$%$t# 8$55, e)er# t$n of 8ean And "e *ade *e $(n a %ontra%t to pa# "er8a%+ e)er# penn# S"e S"e e)en produ%ed a do%u*ent to a# t"at *# fat"er "ad

($)en "er "$ ent$re "ou e

MATILDAD$d "e rea55# do t"at1 Ma(nu D$d "e rea55# <u t ($)e "er "$ "ou e1

MISS HONEYI don6t +now But I f$nd $t "ard to 8e5$e)e u t 5$+e I %annot 8e5$e)e t"at "e

wou5d "a)e t"at "e wou5d "a)e +$55ed "$* e5f 0"$%" $ w"at "e a$d"appened

2AT L3A gasps.

MATILDAYou t"$n+ You t"$n+ "e did him in ! Don6t #ou, M$ Hone#1

MISS HONEYI %annot a# A55 I +now $ t"at #ear of 8e$n( 8u55$ed 8# t"at wo*an *ade

*e pat"et$%! I wa trapped

MATILDAAnd t"at6 w"# #ou 5$)e "ere

MISS HONEY(his roof keeps me dry when the rain falls.

(his door helps to keep the cold at bay.n this floor I can stand on my own two feet.

n this chair I can write my lessons.n this pillow I can dream my nights away.

And this table, as you can see, ell, it's perfect for tea.

It isn't much, but it is enough for me.It isn't much, but it is enough +

MATILDABut M$ Hone#, "e6 (ot #our fat"er6 "ou e! S"e6 (ot e)er#t"$n( t"at6 #our

3 &he moves to sit on the same stool as 2 && #+%!/. 4MISS HONEY

n these walls, I hang wonderful pictures.(hrough this window, I can watch the seasons change.

By this lamp, I can read! And I . . . I am set free.

)or the first time, 2AT L3A gives a small smile.

MISS HONEY And when it's cold outside, I feel no fear.

"en in the winter storms, I am warmedBy a small but stubborn fire.

And there is nowhere I would rather be.

It isn't much, but it is enough for me.

;or this is my house.(his is my house.


2 && #+%!/ opens a drawer and takes out a shiny, white scarf. &lowly, from theback of the stage, the !&*A$+L+1 &T walks toward 2 && #+%!/.

MISS HONEY(his is my house.(his is my house.

It isn't much, but it is enough +

2 && #+%!/ wraps the scarf around 2AT L3A5s shoulders.

ESCA&OLOGIST0on't cry +



MISS HONEY And when it's cold and bleak, I feel no fear.

ESCA&OLOGISTlease don't cry. I'm here.

MISS HONEY"en in the fiercest storms, I am warmed +

ESCA&OLOGISTlease don't cry.

MISS HONEYBy a small but stubborn fire.

ESCA&OLOGIST/et me wipe away your tears.

;orgi"e me +

MISS HONEY"en when outside, it's freeDing +

ESCA&OLOGISTI didn't mean to desert you.

MISS HONEYI don't pay much heed.

ESCA&OLOGISTI know that I hurt you.

MISS HONEYI know that e"erything I need

Is in here.

The !&*A$+L+1 &T approaches 2 && #+%!/ from behind and places a hand on hershoulder.

MISS HONEYIt isn't much, but it is enough for me.


The !&*A$+L+1 &T slowly e-its the stage. 2AT L3A looks down at the scarf she iswearing.

MATILDAM$ Hone#, $ t"$ #our fat"er6 %arf1

MISS HONEYYe Ye , $t $ M# *ot"er (a)e $t to "$* 8efore "e d$ed You ee, "e wa 9

MATILDAAn a%ro8at

MISS HONEY

Ye Ye , "e wa And *# fat"er wa 9MATILDA

An e %apo5o($ t

MISS HONEYMat$5da, "ow d$d #ou +now t"at1

MATILDASo So t"e# were #our parent !

MISS HONEY0"at1 0"o1

MATILDAT"e peop5e $n *# tor#!

MISS HONEY0"at tor#1

MATILDA



A tor#! I6)e 8een te55$n( a tor#, and I t"ou("t I wa *a+$n( $t up, 8ut $t6rea5! It6 #our 5$fe! I6)e een #our 5$fe

MISS HONEYYou6)e een *# 5$fe1

MATILDAS"e d$d "$* $n! Let6 (o to t"e po5$%e! 3 &he grabs 2 && #+%!/5s hands and tries to

drag her away. 4

MISS HONEYNo! No, we %an6t! 0e6)e no e)$den%e!

MATILDA0e %an <u t te55 t"e*! Te55 t"e* "e d$d $t!

MISS HONEYIt won6t wor+, Mat$5da! It wou5d *e *# word a(a$n t "er ! T"e#6d ne)er 8e5$e)e "e

wa %apa85e of *urder! 3 &he wrenches her hands free from 2AT L3A5s. 4

MATILDABut why 1 S"e wa o %rue5 to #ou! S"e 8eat #ou!

2 && #+%!/ covers her ears with her hands.

MATILDAS"e "outed at #ou! S"e 5o%+ed #ou up $n t$n# %up8oard and t"rew #ou $nto

%e55ar !

MISS HONEYStop, Mat$5da &5ea e

MATILDAM$ Hone#, #our aunt6 a *urderer S"e +$55ed Ma(nu 0HO IS SHE1

MISS TRUNCHBULL6S 'OICEA %ontra%t $ a %ontra%t $ a %ontra%t!

MATILDAM$ M$ Trun%"8u55

2 && T0 %*#B LL walks heavily onto the stage via the steps at the front. 2AT L3Ascurries off and 2 && #+%!/ lies down on the floor of her house as it recedes to

the back of the stage. 2 && T0 %*#B LL stands on a desk, which rises into the air.The commentator from her videos starts speaking, and 2 && T0 %*#B LL flails asthough recreating one of her games. The *# L30!% enter and stand by the desks.

2 && T0 %*#B LL realises where she is and starts lecturing the *# L30!%.

MISS TRUNCHBULLIn t"$ wor5d, %"$5dren, t"ere are two t#pe of "u*an 8e$n( T"e w$nner and t"e

5o er I a* a w$nner I p5a# 8# t"e ru5e , and I w$n If I p5a# 8# t"e ru5eand I do not w$n, t"en o*et"$n( $ wron( So*et"$n( $ not wor+$n( If

o*et"$n( $ wron(, #ou "a)e to put $t r$("t E)en $f $t %rea*

2 && T0 %*#B LL walks over to the side of the stage and makes as though to pull at

a big chain pull that has descended, then stops short and looks at 2 && #+%!/.MISS TRUNCHBULL

0"at are #ou 5oo+$n( at1

MISS HONEY3 without fear 4 You

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"$ %5a $ (o$n( to "a)e a )er# pe%$a5 pe55$n( te t An# %"$5d w"o (et one$n(5e an wer wron( "a55 (o to C"o+e# 3 to !0 * 4 You! Spe55 O", now, 5et *e

ee Spe55 :newt:

!0 * stands on his chair and turns around.

ERICNewt N 7 E 7 0 7 T Newt

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at1



ERICM$ Hone# tau("t u S"e6 )er# (ood at tea%"$n(

MISS TRUNCHBULLNon en e M$ Hone# $ far too oft and pea%"# to 8e (ood at an#t"$n( An# *oron

%an ee t"at 3 to #+0T!%& A 4 You, turn around, and pe55 t"e one t"$n( t"at #oua55 are :Re)o5t$n( :

#+0T!%& A stands and turns toward the audience.

HORTENSIARe)o5t$n( R 7 E 7 ' 7 O 7 L 7 T 7 I 7 N 7 G Re)o5t$n(

MISS TRUNCHBULLYou6re %"eat$n(!

MISS HONEYOf %our e "e6 not %"eat$n(! S"e6 $*p5# pe55$n( a word!

MISS TRUNCHBULLT"e e 5$tt5e pe%+ of du t %an6t 8e t"$ %5e)er T"e# are wor* !

MISS HONEYI tau("t t"e*! T"at6 a55 0$t" +$ndne , and pat$en%e, and re pe%t!

MISS TRUNCHBULLHow dare #ou 8r$n( t"o e word $nto *# %5a roo*, *ada*! You +now not"$n( of

tea%"$n(, and I "a55 pro)e $t 3 to LA6!%3!0 4 You, f$5t"78o(, not no e Spe55 :a*%"e55a7+a*anea57 ept$%an$ 7t$*o $ :!

MISS HONEY0"at1 T"at6 not a word! You <u t *ade $t up!

MISS TRUNCHBULLSpe55 or (o to C"o+e#! And I "ou5d warn #ou/ It "a $5ent 5etter

LA'ENDERA M C 7 H E L L A 3 &he hesitantly starts

counting on her fingers. 4

MISS TRUNCHBULLO" dear O", dear$e, dear$e 9

LA'ENDER?!

MISS TRUNCHBULLNo, I6* o orr# $t wa a $5ent ! You6re (o$n( to C"o+e#!

2 && T0 %*#B LL takes LA6!%3!0 by the wrist and drags her down the stairs off thestage. Before they get too far, % 1!L stands up on his desk.

NIGELCat! C 7 A 7 =! Cat! I (ot $t wron(, *$ You "a)e to put *e $n C"o+e#, too


!0 * stands on his desk.

ERICDo( D 7 Y 7 & Do( And *e!

A2A%3A stands on her desk.

AMANDATa85e F 7 A 7 B 7 L 7 Y And *e

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at are #ou do$n(1 0"at6 (o$n( on1 Stop t"$ S$t down

#+0T!%& A stands on her desk.

HORTENSIAYou %an6t put u a55 $n t"e C"o+e#!

MISS TRUNCHBULL



S$t down S$t down!

HORTENSIABanana ! B 7 F 7 Y 7 G 7 A 9

All *# L30!%, e-cept B0 *!, stand on their desk and start shouting. 2 &&T0 %*#B LL staggers over to the chain pull and pulls it. There is a sound of aheavy door closing, and the gates of the school cast a shadow on the *# L30!%.

They go silent and sit in their seats.

MISS TRUNCHBULL:You "a)e to put *e $n C"o+e#, too You %an6t put u a55 $n t"e C"o+e#, *$ :

Co*e now, *a((ot You t"$n+ I "a)en6t t"ou("t of t"at1

2 && T0 %*#B LL takes a large radio transmitter from her belt. 3elicately, shee-tends the antenna and flips open the lid, then presses a button. 1reen laser

beams start to shoot from every which way across the theatre, shrouding everythingin green light.

MISS TRUNCHBULLI6)e 8een 8u #! A w"o5e arra# of C"o+e# ! One for ea%" and e)er# one of #ou! Nowt"at our 5$tt5e pe55$n( te t $ o)er, I %an te55 #ou t"at ea%" and e)er# one of

#ou "a fa$5ed!

2AT L3A peeks out from under her desk and e-tends her hands to the chalkboard. A piece of chalk starts moving upon the board.

MISS TRUNCHBULLYou ee, *a((ot , $n t"$ wor5d, t"ere are two t#pe of "u*an 8e$n( T"e w$nner

and t"e 5o er And I 9

NIGELT"e %"a5+! Loo+, t"e %"a5+!


CHILDIt6 *o)$n(

ERICIt6 *o)$n(! It6 It6 wr$t$n( o*et"$n(

MISS TRUNCHBULL0"at t"e de)$51 0"o1 0"o1

CHILDNo one No one6 do$n( an#t"$n(

2 && T0 %*#B LL switches off the lasers. The chalk starts writing as the *# L30!%read the words from the board.

CHILDA( 7 a 7 t"a A(at"a

CHILDT"$ 7 $ 7 Ma(nu

2 && #+%!/ reaches up as though to touch the letters, then looks at 2AT L3A.

MISS TRUNCHBULLHe %an6t He %an6t!

CHILDG$)e 7 *# 7 en 7 n# 7 8a%+ 7 "er 7 "ou e

CHILDT"en 7 LEA'E!

MISS TRUNCHBULLNo No, no, no, no, no

CHILD and MISS TRUNCHBULLOr 7 I 7 w$55 7 (et 7 #ou 9

CHILD and MISS TRUNCHBULL



9 5$+e 7 YOU 7 GOT 7 ME!

CHILDREN and MISS HONEYRun! Run! RUN! 3 etc. 4

2 && T0 %*#B LL makes as though to erase the letters, but is bullied off the stepson the stage and disappears. The *# L30!% scream in triumph. B0 *!, who has until

this point been silent, stands on his desk and takes out a microphone.

BRUCE hooo a!Ne"er again will she get the best of me.

Ne"er again will she take away my freedom. And we don't forget the day we fought +

CHILDREN;or the right to be a little bit naughty!

Ne"er again +

BRUCE – will the 1hokey door slam!

CHILDRENNe"er again +

BRUCE – will I be bullied, and +

CHILDRENNe"er again +

BRUCE – will I doubt it when +


Ne)er a(a$n!

2AT L3A walks over to 2 && #+%!/. They take each other by the hand and run off.

CHILDRENNe"er again will we li"e behind bars.Ne"er again now that we know we are

3e"olting children,/i"ing in re"olting times. e sing re"olting songs,=sing re"olting rhymes.

e'll be re"olting children(ill our re"olting's done,

And we'll ha"e the (runchbull bolting + e're re"olting.

Aarrr"!

e are re"olting children,/i"ing in re"olting times. e sing re"olting songs,=sing re"olting rhymes.

e'll be re"olting children(ill our re"olting's done,

And we'll ha"e the (runchbull bolting + e're re"olting.

TOMMY e will become a screaming hoard!

LA'ENDER(ake out your hockey stick and use it as a sword!

BRUCENe"er again will we be ignored!

HORTENSIA e'll find out where the chalk is stored!



NIGEL And draw rude pictures on the board!

ALICEIt's not insulting!

CHILDREN0e6re re)o5t$n(!

e can % / how we like.If enough of us are wrong, rong is right.

"ery one N 3 ( why*'1ause we're a little bit naughty!

%o we got to stay inside the line.If we disobey at the same time,

(here is nothing that the (runchbull can do.

BRUCES"e %an ta+e "er "a**er and S 7 H 7 U 9

CHILDREN 4ou didn't think you could push us too far,

But there's no going back now. e3 7 / ( I N +

BRUCERe)o5t$n( t$*e !

CHILDREN e'll % I N & +

BRUCESon( !

CHILDREN= % I N & +

BRUCER"#*e !

CHILDREN e'll be 3 7 / ( I N &.

It is H/ J=. e 3 "olting.

+L3!0 9 3& start 8umping in from off the stage and 8oin the *# L30!%.

CHILDREN and OLDER ?IDS e are re"olting children,

/i"ing in re"olting times. e sing re"olting songs,=sing re"olting rhymes.

e'll be re"olting children(ill our re"olting's done.It is H/ J=.

The ne-t three verses overlap.

3CHILDREN e are re"olting children,

/i"ing in re"olting times. e sing re"olting songs,=sing re"olting rhymes.

e'll be re"olting children(ill our re"olting's done.

OLDER ?IDS

e 3 7 / ( I N. e'll % I N &,= % I N &.

e'll be 3 7 / ( I N &.



BRUCENe"er again will she get the best of me.

hooo a!0own, down, down, down. 4

CHILDREN and OLDER ?IDSIt is H/ J=.

e are re"olting!

'ith a bang, the theatre is showered in confetti. The *# L30!% and +L3!0 9 3& runoff stage and the scene changes to the library. 2AT L3A is standing facing the

books, with a collection of books in her hand. 2 && #+%!/ walks in reading from a piece of paper, and 20& $#!L$& stands on a small block.

MRS &HEL&SA few da# 5ater, t"e A%ro8at and t"e E %apo5o($ t6 dau("ter re%e$)ed a 5etter

fro* a o5$%$tor It a$d t"at "er parent 6 w$55 "ad *# ter$ou 5# turned up, and"e wa now t"e owner of a 8eaut$fu5 o5d "ou e, w"$%" "ad, up unt$5 t"at *o*ent,

8een owned 8# t"e e)$5 aunt, one A(at"a Trun%"8u55 S"e *o)ed $n $**ed$ate5# And"e wa )er# "app# Happ$er t"an "e "ad e)er 8een $n "er ent$re 5$fe

MISS HONEYAnd a for M$ Trun%"8u55, "e wa ne)er een a(a$n T"e C"o+e# were $**ed$ate5#

de tro#ed, and a new "ead*$ tre too+ o)erMRS &HEL&S

And "er na*e wa 3 &he points happily. 4 M$ Hone# And $t $ often a$d t"at$t wa t"e 8e t %"oo5 $n a55 t"e 5and

MISS HONEYAnd do #ou +now o*et"$n( e5 e1 Mat$5da wa ne)er a(a$n a85e to *o)e t"$n( w$t"

"er e#e I t"ou("t $t wa 8e%au e "er *$nd wa 8e$n( %"a55en(ed, 8ut "e a$d $twa 8e%au e "e no 5on(er "ad a need for uperpower So*et$*e I wou5d 5oo+ at

"er T"e 5$tt5e ($r5 w"o "ad done o *u%" to "e5p ot"er , 8ut wa tu%+ w$t"parent w"o were *ean, and %rue5, and %a55ed "er na*e , and I wou5d fee5 *# 85ood

8o$5, and I wou5d w$ " t"at I %ou5d <u t do o*et"$n(

MRS &HEL&SSo, t"$ $ t"e end And I w$ " o *u%" t"at I %ou5d te55 #ou t"at t"e tor# "a a

"app# end$n( I w$ " o *u%" t"at I %ou5d te55 #ou t"at Mat$5da (ot t"e 5o)e "ede er)ed But per"ap t"e trut" $ not a55 tor$e "a)e "app# end$n(

There is a pause. The sound of a car pulling up is heard. 20 '+02'++3, 20&'+02'++3, 2 *#A!L, and 0 3+L$#+ enter from the stairs to the left of the stage.

2 *#A!L is wearing a sombrero and 0 3+L$#+ carries an inflatable alligator.

MR 0ORM0OODDon6t <u t tand t"ere (awp$n(! 0e6re (o$n( to Spa$n!

MATILDASpa$n1 But w"#1

MRS 0ORM0OOD

Be%au e t"$ $d$ot, t"$ n$t, t"$ tw$t78ra$n, ee*ed to t"$n+ $t wa a (ood $deato e55 one "undred f$ft# f$)e o5d 8an(er to t"e Ru $an *af$a!

MR 0ORM0OODI d$dn6t +now t"e# were t"e f5a*$n( Ru $an *af$a, d$d I1 3 #e takes 2AT L3A by the

wrist. 4 Co*e on, 8o# 0e6re 5ea)$n( fore)er and we6re ne)er %o*$n( 8a%+

20 '+02'++3 starts to drag 2AT L3A off stage. 2 && #+%!/ runs to stand in his way.

MISS HONEYLet Mat$5da ta# "ere! 0$t" *e

MR 0ORM0OODI 8e( #our pardon!

MISS HONEYMr 0or*wood, I wou5d 5o)e to ta+e Mat$5da If "e6d 5$+e to ta# w$t" *e, t"at $I wou5d 5oo+ after "er w$t" 5o)e and %are, and I6d pa# for e)er#t"$n( 0ou5d

0ou5d #ou 5$+e t"at, Mat$5da1



MR 0ORM0OODYou *ean You *ean, 5ea)e our dau("ter "ere w$t" #ou1

MATILDA3 shocked 4 0"at d$d #ou a#1 D$d #ou 1

MRS 0ORM0OODT"e#655 8e "ere an# *$nute!

MATILDADad1 You %a55ed *e #our dau("ter

There is the sound of a car pulling up. The 'ormwoods and 0 3+L$#+ scatter.

MRS &HEL&S@u$%+! H$de $n t"e 8oo+ !

RUDOL&HO0"at $f t"e# da*a(e *# 5e( 1 M# 8eaut$fu5 5e( 1

&everal #!%*#2!% in dark suits walk onto stage from the steps on both sides. Theyare carrying weapons, including a baseball bat and a crowbar. &!01! , their head,

steps onto stage in a fur7lined cloak. #e pulls a pink lollipop from his mouth.

SERGEI3 to 2AT L3A 4 You are t"e 0or*wood 6 dau("ter1

MATILDAYe

SERGEI0"ere $ #our fat"er1

MATILDAHe6 I don6t +now

SERGEI0or*wood $ a tup$d *an And, 8e$n( tup$d, "e a u*ed I wa tup$d too And t"at

$ a )er#, )er# tup$d, and rude, t"$n( to do

MATILDAYe , I a* afra$d *# dau("ter $ >u$te rude And )er#, )er# tup$d

SERGEIYou +now t"$ 1 At 5ea t t"ere $ one %5e)er one $n t"e fa*$5#

The #!%*#2!% laugh. &!01! cuts them off with a gesture.

SERGEI0"at $ #our na*e, 5$tt5e ($r51

MATILDAMat$5da

SERGEII 5$+e #ou, Mat$5da You ee* *art Certa$n5#, $n *# 5$ne of wor+, #ou don6t

often (et to *eet *art peop5e 5$+e #ou Mo t of t"e peop5e I dea5 w$t", t"e$rt"$n+$n( $ a55 8a%+ward

MICHAELBa%+ward !

The #!%*#2!% scatter, looking for the 'ormwoods.

SERGEIJK PQ K J KPQ V WX ZQ

3$ri8atno poznakomitCs8a s tako8 umno8 devoDko8. 4

MATILDA[ P \ ] X K ^X JK PQ K J P

3 &pasibo. 2ne toEe pri8atno poznakomitCs8a s vami. 4

SERGEI_` b 7 V Q 13Ty govoriFC po7russki? 4



MATILDAGH IJK MNMOM, KJK PQH MIHRMS UV. GM W UXYX SIJNJI SW Z Z[X\JI YJR OH.

3Ne ta+ "oroco, +a+ *ne "ote5o 8# No <a 8udu tarat <a $ $ u at da5 ce 4

SERGEIMat$5da! 0"o tau("t #ou "ow to pea+ Ru $an1

MATILDA0e55, I tau("t *# e5f, I uppo e I wa read$n( Do to#e) +#, and I <u t t"ou("t $t

wou5d 8e 8etter to read $t $n t"e 5an(ua(e $t wa wr$tten $n

&!01! leans down and kisses her three times on the cheeks.

SERGEII a* Ser(e$! It $ tru5# an "onour to *eet #ou, Mat$5da 0or*wood Mat$5da, #our

fat"er "a 8een tup$d and rude to 8ot" of u , #e 1 I %ou5d )er# ea $5# "a)e oneof *# fr$end tea%" "$* *anner And one da#, w"en "e 5ea)e "o p$ta5, "e w$55t$55 8e tup$d, 8ut not o rude, I t"$n+ I ($)e t"$ a a ($ft to #ou 0"at do

#ou a#1

2AT L3A takes &!01! by the hand and pulls him to the side.

MATILDAMr Ser(e$, t"$ $ a )er# te*pt$n( offer But "e $ *# fat"er, and I a* "$

dau("ter I t"$n+ I6)e "ad enou(" of re)en(e&!01! takes his dark glasses off and bends on one knee.

SERGEI(his little girl . . .(his miracle . . .

Matil da . . .

HENCHMAN Da1

HENCHMAN -Da1

HENCHMENDa!

All the henchmen raise their weapons at 20 '+02'++3, who is cowering on the floor.

SERGEI]IM ^V YHRJHIH?_

3 to )# de5aete1!4

HENCHMAN `V SKJ[JRZ " J"_

3'# +a a5$ :Da:!4

HENCHMAN - QH SKJ[JR " J"_

3 a ne +a a5 :Da:!4

SERGEIJIZR _ W SKJ[JR " JIZR "_

3Mat$5 DA! <a +a a5 :Mat$5 DA:!4

The #!%*#2!% walk away, placated.

SERGEI]IM S ^JPZ SH MYQW_

3 to )a*$ e(odn<a!4

3 to 2AT L3A 4 Your fat"er $ )er#, )er# tup$d But "e $ a5 o )er#, )er#, )er# )er# 5u%+# to "a)e #ou a "$ dau("ter A5t"ou(", $f I "appen to 8e do$n(

8u $ne "ere a(a$n and I ee "$*, "e w$55 not 8e o 5u%+#

&!01! and the #!%*#2!% leave.

MRS 0ORM0OOD@u$%+! Let6 (et out of "ere 8efore t"e# %"an(e t"e$r *$nd !



MR 0ORM0OOD0a$t, w"at a8out t"e ($r51

20& '+02'++3 makes a sound of disgust as she hurries away.

MR 0ORM0OOD3 to 2AT L3A 4 Do #ou 9 want to 9 ta# "ere, w$t" M$ Hone#1

MATILDA

Ye Ye , I do!MR 0ORM0OOD

3 to 2 && #+%!/ 4 And do #ou want to, er, 5oo+ after "er1

MISS HONEYI do

MR 0ORM0OOD0e55 0e are a 8$t "ort of roo*, o, #e

MATILDAT"an+ #ou

2AT L3A holds out her hand to her father. #e takes it gingerly in two fingers,and shakes it. After a thought, he tips his hat to her, and it comes away easily

in his hand. #e pauses, and e-its down the stairs. 2AT L3A runs to 2 && #+%!/.

MISS HONEYAnd Mat$5da 5eapt $nto M$ Hone#6 ar* 9

MATILDA9 and "u((ed "er

MISS HONEYO", M$ Hone# "u((ed "er 8a%+

MRS &HEL&SAnd t"e# "ard5# not$%ed a t"e 0or*wood 9

RUDOL&HO 3off stage 4

And Rudo5p"o!MRS &HEL&S

A t"e 0or*wood and Rudo5p"o ped awa# $nto t"e d$ tan%e

20& $#!L$& e-its, pushing a cart of books. 2AT L3A and 2 && #+%!/ have eyes onlyfor each other.

MISS HONEYBe%au e t"e# "ad found ea%" ot"er

MATILDAYe T"e#6d found ea%" ot"er

2AT L3A and 2 && #+%!/ hold hands and walk together to the back of the stage.After a few steps, they drop hands and do cartwheels ne-t to each other.

Lights go down. They come up again to !0 * gliding across the stage on a scooter.)or the curtain call, the whole cast, in turns, comes out on their own scooter,

wheel around the stage, and take their bows.

COM&ANY hen I grow up,

9 hen I grow up, when I grow up:I will be tall enough to reach the branches

(hat I need to reach to climb(he trees you get to climb hen you're grown up.

And when I grow up,9 hen I grow up, when I grow up:I will be smart enough to answer all(he )uestions that you need to know

(he answers toBefore you're grown up.



And when I grow up,I will eat sweets e"ery day,

n the way to work, And I will go to bed late e"ery night.


And I will watch cartoons until my eyes go s)uare,

And I won't care'1ause I'll be all grown up.

hen I grow up . . .

2 && T0 %*#B LL scooters down stage as the back of the stage parts.

COM&ANY"en if you're little you can do a lot. 4ou

Mustn't let a little thing like $little$ stop you.If you sit around and let them get on top, you

on't change a thing.

The company lines up on both sides of the middle of the stage. 2AT L3A walks outto the front of the stage, and each member of the company bows down as she passes

them.

COM&ANY8ust because you find that life's not fair, it


4ou might as well be saying 4ou think that it's okay

And that's not right!

And if it's not right, 4ou ha"e to put it right . . .

The cast starts to make their e-its, leaving 2AT L3A at the front of the stage.

COM&ANYBut nobody else is gonna put it right for meNobody but me is gonna change my story

%ometimes you ha"e to be a little bit +

2 && T0 %*#B LL glides across the back of the stage, angrily.

MISS TRUNCHBULLMa((ot !

COM&ANY – naughty!

T"e ta(e (oe dar+ a $de fro* a pot5$("t on MATILDA S"e <u*p $nto "er%"ara%ter$ t$% po e, f$ t po$ ed on "er "$p , "ead t$5ted "$(" and to t"e r$("t

L$("t (o down 0"en t"e# (o up a(a$n, t"e %a t g$n%5ud$n( t"e or%"e trah *a+et"e$r f$na5 8ow

Matilda Script

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