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Table!of!Contents!!

Ray!Dive!.........................................................................!3!

Vicki’s!Afternoon!............................................................!4!

Greg’s!Glenfiddich!Rocks!................................................!5!

Marcio’s!Midnight!Espresso!............................................!6!

Fahim’s!Cream!Puff!Frenzy!.............................................!7!

Matthijs’!Mud!Smoothie!................................................!8!

Cosmin’s!Cake!Aerobics!..................................................!9!

Andy’s!Paranoia!Pizza!....................................................!10!

Tope’s!Mickey!Mouse!Smoothie!....................................!11!

Matt’s!Mash!..................................................................!12!

Cesare’s!Tequila!............................................................!13!

Mike’s!College!Dinner!....................................................!14!

Felipe’s!Speggtacular!Breakfast!.....................................!15!

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Ray!Dive!By!Ray!Wenderlich!

!!Ray!is!known!as!a!bit!of!a!lightweight!when!it!comes!to!alcohol!8!after!just!a!single!drink!he!has!been!seen!to!get!very!sleepy!and!pass!out!on!the!couch!!!!This!has!come!to!be!called!a!"Ray!Dive"!8!and!here's!a!recipe!so!you!can!experience!this!on!your!own!!

Ingredients!!

• A!drink!• A!couch!

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Instructions!!

1. Give!drink!to!Ray.!!2. Watch!him!sneak!to!the!couch!and!fall!asleep!!

!Caution:!your!couch!will!be!unusable!for!the!next!283!hours.!! !

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Vicki’s!Afternoon!By!Vicki!Wenderlich!

!!As!a!work8from!home!artist,!Vicki!has!quite!a!rigorous!schedule.!!!Follow!this!recipe!to!learn!how!to!live!like!Vicki!!!

Ingredients!!

• Cheese!• Crackers!• Bottle!of!wine!• Laptop!

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Instructions!!

1. Mid8day,!decide!you!need!a!break!2. Load!cheese!and!crackers!on!a!board!3. Pour!a!big!glass!of!wine!4. Load!up!your!favorite!TV!show!on!the!laptop.!!5. Optional:!After!the!cheese!is!consumed,!take!a!walk,!and!maybe!a!

nap!for!good!measure.!!!

It's!a!tough!life!!:]!!! !

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Greg’s!Glenfiddich!Rocks!By!Greg!Pugh!

!!Coding!can!be!strenuous!on!the!mind!and!body,!so!you!need!a!drink!that!nourishes!both.!

Ingredients!!

• Glenfiddich!15!Year8Old!Single!Malt!Scotch!

• Ice!(Optional)!• Scotch!Rocks!(Optional)!

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Instructions!!

1. Pour!scotch!into!a!Mad!Men8style!scotch!glass.!2. Prepare!neat!or!on!the!rocks.!3. Light!up!your!favorite!pipe!or!cigar.!4. Ponder!about!the!mysteries!of!the!universe.!

!Pro!tip:!Don’t!let!your!spouse!or!significant!other!catch!you!smoking!in!the!house!!! !

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Marcio’s!Midnight!Espresso!By!Marcio!Valenzuela!

!!Let’s!face!it,!the!day!has!too!many!distractions.!Often,!your!best!coding!epiphanies!come!at!that!time!where!you’ve!cozied!up!in!bed!and!are!ready!to!sink!into!a!slumber.!!But!when!that!occurs,!use!this!recipe!for!a!round!of!instant!midnight!coding!!

Ingredients!!

• Pure!Honduran!Mountain!Grown!Organic!“Boxha”!Coffee!• An!espresso!machine!• A!cute!dog!

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Instructions!!

1. Get!in!your!favorite!jammies!2. Slip!into!bed!and!wait!for!that!coding!epiphany!!3. Train!your!dog!to!lick!you!awake!and!brew!coffee!for!you!:]!

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Fahim’s!Cream!Puff!Frenzy!By!Fahim!Farook!

!!As!a!coder!who!doesn’t!drink!coffee!or!soda,!there’s!got!to!be!a!way!for!Fahim!to!get!a!daily!jolt!into!his!system.!!And!he!achieves!this!with!one!of!the!world’s!most!amazing!inventions:!chocolate.!If!he!doesn’t!get!his!daily!dose!of!chocolate,!Fahim!becomes!a!really!cranky!coder!!!This!recipe!will!let!you!achieve!a!sugar!high!just!like!Fahim!!!!

Ingredients!!

• A!plate!(or!a!barrel,!if!you!prefer!larger!quantities)!of!cream!puffs!!

Instructions!!

1. Get!your!significant!other!to!make!the!cream!puffs,!and!wait!impatiently!as!they!are!made!

2. Scarf!them!down!as!soon!as!they!are!done,!smacking!your!lips!in!enjoyment!

3. Go!into!a!sugar8high!overdose!and!start!coding!like!mad!!!! !

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Matthijs’!Mud!Smoothie!By!Matthijs!Hollemans!

!!This!is!a!great!smoothie!for!starting!the!day.!It’s!full!of!vitamin!B12,!protein,!and!the!occasional!worm!or!beetle.!!Can!be!a!litte!crunchy,!so!be!sure!to!blend!well.!Enjoy!!!

Ingredients!!

• 1!cup!of!fresh!dirt!(preferably!from!you!own!garden,!but!anywhere!else!will!do).!For!extra!spiciness,!try!some!from!the!side!of!the!road.!

• 2!bananas!• 1!cup!of!(soy)milk!• 1!teaspoon!vanilla!extract!

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Instructions!!

1. Blend!at!high!power!until!smooth.!2. Enjoy!!And!watch!out!for!the!smoothie!mustache.!

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Cosmin’s!Cake!Aerobics!By!Cosmin!Pupăză!

!!Cosmin!enjoys!eating!cakes!so!much!that!he!can’t!find!the!time!to!keep!fit!anymore!!So!he!invented!this!recipe!that!helps!him!combine!the!two.!!!

Ingredients!!

• A!big!plate!full!of!cakes!• A!flat!surface!

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Instructions!!

1. Place!the!plate!of!cakes!on!a!flat!surface!2. Hold!still!on!top!of!them,!trying!to!avoid!the!temptation!to!eat!them!

as!long!as!possible!!3. Eventually!give!in,!and!enjoy!the!cakes!with!a!clean!conscience!!

!Advanced:!do!push8ups,!taking!a!bite!of!cake!each!time!you!are!near!the!plate!!! !

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Andy’s!Paranoia!Pizza!By!Andy!Pereira!

!!Andy!has!grown!increasingly!distrustful!of!all!pizza!delivery!men.!As!a!result,!he!refuses!to!eat!any!pizza!not!made!under!his!supervision.!!This!recipe!guarantees!your!pizza!is!both!safe!and!delicious!!

Ingredients!!

• Naan!• Pizza!sauce!• Mozzarella!• Pepperoni!• A!hefty!amount!of!suspicion!

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Instructions!!

1. Tell!your!spouse!or!significant!other!you!are!hungry.!2. Watch!over!their!shoulder!as!they!make!it.!3. Tell!them!to!broil!at!400!for!12!minutes.!4. Enjoy!in!peace!!!

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Tope’s!Mickey!Mouse!Smoothie!By!Tope!Abayomi!

!!This!recipe!proves!you’re!never!too!old!to!be!a!Mouseketeer!!!

Ingredients!!

• A!mickey!mouse!cup!• Juice!

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Instructions!!

1. Steal!cup!from!little!Jaden!2. Pour!juice!from!the!fridge!3. Sing!the!theme!from!Fantasia!!

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Matt’s!Mash!By!Matt!Galloway!

!!As!a!modern!dad,!Matt!loves!food!that!he!can!enjoy!as!much!as!his!baby!does.!

Ingredients!!

• Any!vegetables!you!wish!!

Instructions!!

1. Put!overcooked!vegetables!on!a!tray!!2. Put!baby!within!reaching!distance!of!tray!3. Wait!for!baby!to!mash!the!vegetables!into!a!fine!mix!(warning:!baby!

may!sample!some!of!the!mixture)!4. Scoop!up!whatever’s!left!over!and!enjoy!!

!Note:!goes!particularly!well!with!a!glass!of!milk.!:]!! !

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Cesare’s!Tequila!By!Cesare!Rocchi!

!!Ever!wondered!why!Cesare!is!always!so!happy?!Here’s!his!secret!!!

Ingredients!!

• Tequila!• Salt!• Lemon!• A!glass!• A!knife!• A!spoon!

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Instructions!!

1. Use!the!knife!to!cut!the!lemon.!2. Prepare!a!lemonade!for!tomorrow.!3. Pour!a!shot!of!tequila.!4. Drink!it.!5. Pour!another!shot!of!tequila.!6. Drink!it.!7. Repeat!steps!386!until!you!are!as!happy!as!Cesare!!

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Mike’s!College!Dinner!By!Mike!Jaoudi!

!!College!students!have!a!difficult!time!with!meals.!They!lack!cooking!skills,!money,!and!to!make!it!worse!–!they!are!always!hungry!!!Here!is!a!cheap!and!easy!recipe!for!a!college!student!on!a!budget.!

Ingredients!!

• 4!packs!of!Ramen!• 2!boxes!of!Mac!and!Cheese!• A!slide!of!dollar!pizza!• 1!malnourished!college!student!

(preferably!stressed!and!sleep!deprived)!

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Instructions!!

1. Gather!all!ingredients!and!follow!the!instructions!on!the!packaging.!2. Take!this!time!to!enjoy!your!food!and!forget!about!all!other!worries.!3. IMPORTANT:!Do!not!eat!more!than!2!packs!of!Ramen!at!once!

without!having!either!Mac!and!Cheese!or!the!pizza!to!balance!the!sodium!intake.!

4. When!finished,!come!to!the!realization!that!you!are!still!hungry.!5. Search!your!laundry!for!additional!coins!to!buy!more!!

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Felipe’s!Speggtacular!Breakfast!By!Felipe!Laso!Marsetti!

!!Felipe’s!is!known!to!be!a!big!diva,!expecting!nothing!but!the!best!when!it!comes!to!cuisine.!!Being!one!to!like!fine!dining!and!eating!well,!he’s!come!up!with!a!recipe!that!is!sure!to!be!featured!in!shows!from!the!likes!of!Gordon!Ramsay,!Emeril!and!Rachel!Ray.!

Ingredients!!

• 1!egg!(large,!small,!brown,!white;!whichever!you!prefer)!

• A!few!leafs!of!spinach!• A!fork!

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Instructions!!

1. Grab!a!large!plate!2. Break!the!egg!and!make!sure!you!place!it!in!the!middle!of!the!plate!3. Garnish!with!spinach!4. Congratulate!yourself!on!being!an!excellent!chef!!

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