Joshua:& Woot,&I&am&here.&& Brad:&...

Brad: Welcome to The Tao of Badass exclusive audio training on how to get into the game. We have Joshua Pellicer, the author of the Tao of Badass.

Joshua: Woot, I am here. Brad: He’s wooting. Joshua: I'm wooting, so thanks, Brad. I wanted to sort of just note that this is an

exclusive interview and audio training content that I produced just for people who want to learn how to get back into the game after a breakup or after being single—or only being single now after being in a relationship for a very long period of time.

And so one of the biggest questions that we see and that I've heard is a guy who

just got divorced or just got out of a long-‐term relationship is, like, it’s exactly what they say. How do I get back in the game? I haven't dated in 3 years or I haven't dated in 4 years or 10 years sometimes.

So how do you go from basically being a unick, which is what happens whenever

you're in a relationship, you put your balls in a box and then your girlfriend gets those things. You know?

Brad: Yeah. Joshua: How do you go from that to turning back—turning the charm back on and

feeling like you're stepping back into your manhood sort of as a single man. Now I know a lot of guys—I'm in a relationship myself included, but you don't always give up your manhood when you're in a relationship, but I almost guarantee you that the relationship just ended, something probably happened to end it, and that probable thing that happened was most likely that you sort of gave up on continuing to produce value, meaning that continuing to produce social value, as in talking to other people and communicating.

And it became too much about you and your relationship and less about you

and your girlfriend or wife communicating to the outside world together. So there's usually by the time that guys have been gotten broken up with or just got out of a relationship or broke up with their girlfriend or divorced or whatever, by the time that finally happens, they've already been out of contact with the rest of the world for several—usually several years.

And typically, the hard part is getting over your ex in the first place and I let my

brilliant friends like Dan Dennick handle how to actually get through the breakup process and how to get over your ex-‐girlfriend or your ex-‐wife, no matter what the case may be.

But once you do that, regardless of who you are, at some point, as men, we've

all—went through this process. We've all been from the place of saying, “Oh, look, I just broke up with a girl. She just broke up with me.” Or, “I just got

divorced.” Whatever it is, we're going to go through this process at some point. Most of us already have and we need to know exactly how to get back on your feet fast, otherwise you'll be sitting around kind of moping and letting a lot of opportunities pass you by. The only thing that we're running out of here is time on the planet Earth with our lives. We have unlimited resources for everything else, for the most part, but time is the only thing we're running out of every second of every day.

So you don't have—you cannot waste time. You have to get this shit handled

now and you have to get back on your feet quick, but you don't want to get back on so fast that you skip over some really crucial steps.

So I'll tell you what a lot of guys do, Brad, and I'll talk to you back and forth

through this and you can share your inside square where you feel that's important. But what most guys do is as soon as they break up with their girlfriend or they get broken up with, they—well, if they get broken up with, usually there's like a grievance period where it’s like, “Oh no, what's wrong?” You try to get your girlfriend back, whatever.

But at some point, every guy goes, “Holy crap, I'm single.” Like, “I can do

whatever I want to now.” So usually what happens is a guy will go out, get drunk, hook up with some random chick, get really needy with that chick because they're not used to interacting with women anymore, and then ruin that interaction with that girl, and then come running back to their ex and beg them to take them back.

This is a really, really common process. So what ends up happening is your self-‐

esteem gets just punted like crazy. There's nothing left because you've left—you had a girl. You left her. You went to another girl. You hooked up with her, got really needy right after that, tried to jump straight into another relationship, moved too fast, didn't follow the system because you haven't been familiarized with the system in such a long time, and then once that didn't work, felt worthless and most guys go, “I'm not going to find another girl better than this other girl. I'd better go back and get her,” your ex-‐girlfriend.

So then we end up running back to those girls, being like, “Oh please, please,

please. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Take me back.” And the worst thing that could possibly happen is that they actually take us back, but usually what happens is they don't want to and we end up looking like complete jackasses and they're not attracted to us whatsoever after that. Then it’s like oh my psycho ex-‐boyfriend or psycho ex-‐husband, that's who you become, like some super needy, unattractive man or shadow of a man.

Brad: Right, you're talking about losing your manhood and that definitely is a situation

where you lose that. Joshua: Yeah, yeah, I mean the problem is that what happens most of the time, and I've

been a victim of this too, man, don't get me wrong. I've done this, for sure,

where I've run back and I'm just like begging, yet everything that I'm doing, every single little thing that I'm doing, every point of contact that I have with my ex, I dig a deeper hole. It gets worse and worse for me. So the best thing for me to end up doing, the best thing for you to do, I implore you to do this is to shut up and stop continuing.

But while all your emotions are running wild, you can't be communicating with

your ex like flaying it all out there and just like splaying yourself so that you try to get her back that way. That's not really how it works.

So let's say that you've been through that or not, let's say that you broke up

with her and you ran out and did whatever you did or you got broken up with and you're sort of in that grievance process and you're getting through it. Well, I'm going to tell you now something that is—during this call and this interview, I'm going to reveal a step-‐by-‐step process to overcome sort of the fear of getting back in the game, not just overcome the fear, but to actually get back in the game. By the end of this audio training series or audio training course, you're going to be—if you follow everything that I do in this course, you will be back in the game better than you were before you met your ex and you'll be dating more attractive—I know it’s kind of crazy to think about this, but you'll be dating more attractive, cooler, more just to the core better for you women than you ever have before in your life. And that's really what the goal is here.

So—but the first thing we have to do and this is one of the big things I think a lot

of guys skip over is you have to make a decision, sort of right now, at this moment. And if you haven't recently gotten out of a breakup and you're listening to this, you still need to make this decision if you haven't made it yet, and if you can't make this decision, you need to pause this training course and sit on it and not listen to anything else until you can make this decision.

So if you can't—if you find it impossible to do this, just stop listening after I say

what to do. Stop listening, let it digest to the point where you actually can process it and you do believe and you do understand and then continue because no matter what you do, if you don't make this decision that I'm about to announce to you now, no matter what I tell you, it will not work. So you'll be wasting your time. You'll get to the place where you're halfway through the process and you'll start to see that the results that I explain are not the results that you have. So you want to make sure you make this decision.

That decision is from now on to only date women, I mean exclusively date

women that are better or more attractive than your ex. You have to make that decision, not better in whatever way, more confident, more to the core attractive, more mature, more physically attractive, you have to take—make a decision right now to take a step up from your ex and stay there.

Right, so your baseline is only dating exclusively, I mean one-‐on-‐one dating, like

monogamous dating, you're only going to date a woman monogamously if she’s better than your ex and keep that in mind because what a lot of guys do is they

get into relationships immediately after their last relationship and it’s a girl who’s not better, just different, right, just different than their ex is. And so you have to make a decision right now, and like I said, even if you aren't coming out of a breakup, you still need to make this decision. You need to make the decision to only date, monogamously date, meaning like one-‐on-‐one, only dating one person, if you're going to be exclusive with a girl, you can only get exclusive with her if she is better in every way you can think of than your ex. That's really, really important.

So why is that important? Because what we typically do is in a position of

scarcity or fear, which is where most guys are when they have just exited a relationship, they feel scarcity. I don't have a lot of options. From that place, if you decide to be with somebody, we can lie to ourselves that this person is good for us for the rest of your life. We have the ability to lie to ourselves for the rest of our lives. We can do that.

In fact, many people do. They’ll get in a relationship that's bad and they’ll start

to go down that path. They’ll invest a bunch into the relationship and then they won't want to break up and then they end up getting married and then resenting each other for the next 50 years, you know?

Brad: Mm hmm. Joshua: Just being in a terrible relationship. So you don't want that for yourself. I know

you don't. I don't want that for you either. So you have to, have to make a decision to take a step up from here on and every single time I've broken up with or gotten broken up—broken up with a girl or gotten broken up with by a girl, I've made this decision every single time and now after doing that, it forced me to sort of take it to the next level and improve myself every time.

That way you don't—it’s not a total waste whenever you break up with a girl or

you get broken up with. When you have a relationship and it ends, if you jump straight into another one immediately, it’s a waste of everything that you've just learned from the last relationship. You're just going to repeat problems and you're going to have the same issue over and over again until eventually you realize that you're the problem not her.

And so you have to make that pact right now. So between me and you, Brad,

and everyone listening, if you are—if you have made that decision to only date women who are better in every way you can think of, more attractive, whatever, then your ex was, then you can continue listening. If you haven't made that decision or that pact that you're going to guarantee, like you're making a decision with us, as brothers right now, if you haven't made that and you can't make it, pause or stop this audio training course and don't listen to anymore until you can say that's true.

So, does that make sense, Brad?

Brad: Yeah, it totally does and I think that that's what we really want when we do get out of relationships is we do want to go to a better place and for whatever reasons, there's a lot of reasons for that, but we want to be dating somebody better, that everybody can sort of tell is better.

Joshua: Right. Brad: That's the way I've felt. Joshua: Yeah, I mean it’s—for me whenever I had the first experience with my current

girlfriend 9 years ago or something, almost 9 years ago, when I saw her for the first time, I just set the bar saying that anybody who came after this had to be—had to make me feel like this or better, right?

Brad: Mm hmm. Joshua: And what I did—what I ended up doing was being too lenient on that. Like I

would—the first person I dated after that was not better than her and I just sort of rationalized it in my head and was like, “Oh, she’s better because it’s the right time for her.” Or something, I had some b.s. thing that I decided to do.

So what I should have done is I shouldn't have been dating these girls

exclusively. I should have just been dating polyamorously, like not being one-‐on-‐one dating them, like just hooking up with them and going back and forth and not being exclusive with anybody unless she was better. And had I done that, I would have been at the place where I was ready to attract my current girlfriend, again, a lot sooner than it took me. It took me 7 years or something to get her back, or 8 years.

So it was really complicated for me because I'd let this go, so I don't want you

guys to have to do that too because you don't have time to wait another decade to find somebody better than your ex or your last girlfriend or even the best girlfriend you've ever had. You can look back at that one. If your last girlfriend was kind of crappy and you're looking back on another girl who was even better than her, you want to take your best interaction, your best relationship or what you believe you deserve and you want to put that there and say, “That's the bar.” Don't settle for anything less than the bar.

I decided that I was going to figure it all out of die trying because I wasn't going

to settle. What's worse than death is living a life with somebody you don't really care about or wanting her to be somebody else the whole time. It’s not like you're in a hurry there, so.

So that's one thing. So if you've made that decision, awesome, let's move

forward and I'm going to introduce to you a sort of like a concept that I sort of go over a little bit in some of my other trainings, but I'm going to go into it in very deep detail. I'm going to give you a step-‐by-‐step process you can follow that will get you back in the game, guaranteed to get you back in the game.

This is what I've done every single time I've done it, when I've met other guys who’ve gone through the same process, I've taught them to do this. Every guy I've taught to do this has been back in the game within a matter of weeks. So it does not take very long.

But if you don't do this, it typically takes you however long your relationship was,

it takes you that long divided by 2. So if you were together for 6 years, it typically takes 3 years to get over that person.

Brad: Wow! Joshua: So this is usually how it works. So if you've been together for 2 years, it’ll be 1

year, together for 1 year, 6 months, right? So that's only if you don't do what I'm about to tell you. So if you were dating her, I'm guessing that you dated her for longer than 6 weeks, which is why it would affect you in the first place, but if not, no big deal. I'm going to get you back as fast as humanly possible without having to sacrifice anything by ignoring or recreating the same problems and stuff like that, to actually better yourself to get you to the next level.

So first thing I want to introduce though in this training series or audio training

course is the idea of the social muscle. So this is the concept that came to me when I was trying to solve the—find a cure rather, not solve, but find a cure for approach anxiety, as in you see a girl and you think she’s hot. You want to go talk to her, but then all of a sudden you get scared, right? That's approach anxiety.

And when I was trying to figure out how to solve that for guys, I came across this

concept of this social muscle. And when I started explaining it and exploring it a little bit, it just worked perfectly for me and then for everybody else that I explained it to and anybody who applied it was able to get over their approach anxiety and get rid of that fear. But beyond that, it became sort of a staple and a baseline for a lot of stuff that I teach. So I'll sort of introduce that now.

Whenever we have social interaction with somebody, with anybody actually, in

our lives, our brain is using a certain function. It’s a cerebral function that we've built over time that makes us different than all the other apes, basically. It’s what separates us from all the rest of the upright-‐walking primates, right? And—for the most part, upright-‐walking because no other primates actually walk upright like we do.

So, except you Brad. You're the only one walking upright. No, I'm kidding. So

what we use, that sort of area of our brain, is our social area of our brain. It’s the area that allows us to have really complex social environments and social interactions, but it also allows us to do something that separates us from all the other species and what makes us the dominant species in the world, which is project a concept, imagine something that's going to be happening. This is sort of our simulation brain, as we call it.

So to simulate something happening before we do it, this is something that other animals really can't do. They’ll look up and they’ll see a tiger and they won't go, “Well, let me imagine that I walk over there to that tiger and then let me imagine walking past them and let me imagine what he would do,” and then come up with a scenario in our heads and then go, “Okay, I'm not going to do it that way.” Right, I'll do it this way instead.

That's what actually separates us from everybody, from all the rest of the

animals is this ability to simulate. Now this is a very young ability and it’s really under developed. It’s like some of our under developed muscles that we have in our bodies. So the social muscle is this is part of our brain that is so new that we need to constantly upkeep it and keep it working and exercise it. And that's what allows us to keep our intelligence high, things like this.

So if you look at a muscle, the first thing you have to realize is that since you

haven't been interacting in society at the level at which you have been in the past or you have before, probably when you met your last girlfriend, your muscle is going to be very weak, like imagine you don't work out in the gym for 3 years and not only that, but you don't do anything but sit down and just do nothing. You have no physical activity whatsoever, you know? What were you going to say, Brad?

Brad: I said done. I can imagine that perfectly. Joshua: Okay. Perfect, so if you have no physical activity whatsoever for maybe 3 years

or something, imagine going into a gym and then seeing the weights, the bench press machine, and then sitting down and going, “Put 500 pounds on this,” and then trying to lift it.

Now what’ll happen immediately is you're not going to be able to have even the

strength to support the bar. You will not be able to hold 500 pounds up, period. It’ll fall on you and typically what it does is it, something like that, that could actually kill you, but usually what happens with our social version of this is that we go out and we attempt immediately to just like overdo it. We try to just go crazy talking to women and trying to talk to the hottest women, period, like we can possibly find and we just get blown out. We get rejected over and over and over again because we're not used to it anymore.

And so instead of it killing our physical body, it kills our self-‐esteem. It kills our

confidence and so going out and trying to pretend like your social muscle is what it used to be will actually kill your confidence and it won't give you the strength to continue moving forward.

So you're going to have to accept, accept right now that you are not going to be

as strong as you used to be. You're not going to be, not in the very beginning. You've got to work this back up.

So you have to sort of warm up your social muscle and just like a workout routine, you've got to have a series of increasing sort of weight, so to speak, on what you're doing that will allow you to build up your muscle as fast as possible, but not too fast. If it’s too fast, then you will burn out. You will feel like you're worthless. You'll get depressed. You'll get worse anxiety, which is terrible, and then you'll end up feeling worse than you did when you started, which is what most guys do. They end up ruining their interactions with every single woman because they didn't start out where they knew they belonged.

They belong a lot—imagine you're starting from scratch. You have to start there,

you know? And so because when you get in a relationship, I know this. I'm in a relationship now and sort of one of the things that I do accept about myself, because I'm in a relationship right now, if I were to be single all of a sudden out of nowhere, I've worked through this process here and gotten it down to the point where I can actually go through this, what I'm about to teach you in a bit here, I can go through this warm-‐up sequence in a matter of days.

Sometimes I can even go through it in a matter of hours, but that's not going to

happen if I was single all of a sudden right now because I'm with the girl of my dreams. So I wouldn't—it would probably take me a little bit more than an hour to get over that. But once I'm over it, because I know what I'm doing, I can actually chunk all this stuff down usually into one day of sort of warming up and then after that I'm fine. I can go right back to being who I used to be and I'd actually be better than I used to be because in the meantime I've had a lot of realizations since I'd been with her that I hadn't had before when I was single, so—and I'll be able to put those into play.

So whenever I was sort of—what I've done is taken this process and sort of

crunched it down into an intensive process that I can use in one day. If you want to try that, then I guess you can go ahead and try it, but if it doesn't work that first day, then don't freak out. Just go back and start it again, do it slowly. But I would dedicate an entire day to this, absolutely, to taking it from zero to 60 here, at least an entire day of just like almost 24 hours. Like wake up in the morning at 6AM and then go until like 2AM and just constantly do it because it’s worth it for you.

But if you don't have that much time to do it all in one day, I highly suggest that

you spread it out over a few weeks so that you don't get totally burnt out by the end of that few week period.

If you don't have a piece of paper right now and a pen, I highly suggest you grab

one because you're going to want to write this process down that I'm about to go over.

So as you're warming up, I'm going to give you sort of a workout routine for

your social muscle that's going to get you strong again and stronger than you were before, and I'm going to give you a couple of things that are sort of steroids, so to speak, that give you an unfair advantage, especially at the end of

this, sort of the last stage. We’ll give you an unfair advantage to every other guy who you'll meet, so that's sort of the part that I think will be really exciting for you.

So Brad, anything for you to note so far on this? I know I'm sort of talking over

you here. I haven't given you… Brad: Oh no. I'm all ears. I think a lot of guys are going to be just completely ready for

this because everybody really wants to get back into the game, I think. Joshua: Yeah. Brad: The fastest way possible is going to be amazing, so I'm all ears, man. Joshua: Okay, cool. One of the things that I want to note here is that even if you're not

just out of a breakup and you're—but you do experience approach anxiety, figure out where you are in this process currently and take off from there and start to go to the next level.

So if you're having a hard time talking to women and attracting—talking to a

beautiful woman during the daytime, then you're going to take a step right before that on my process and you're going to stay there and then you're going to keep doing that step before it and then move on to the attractive women.

So the way that we're typically going to do this, and just to kind of give you an

idea, is you're going to go through talking to different types of people in a different kind of way over and over until you get to the point where you can accomplish something every time you approach this kind of person.

What guys typically do and the reason why guys have a really hard time with

approach anxiety and have a really hard time at bars, especially, is that they're going to a bar and they're trying to attract women, so all they do is talk to women. This is great if you are—if you've gone through this process already where you've gone through the steps that I'm about to say, but if you haven't gone through all the steps I'm about to say, then if you go to the bar and you try to talk to women, it’s not going to work because you don't have all the necessary elements in your mind, like your brain hasn't simulated, that sort of simulation part of your brain hasn't warmed up yet to the point where you can handle that heavy lifting.

Going up and talking to a super-‐hot chick is—and then attracting her is like

trying to lift 300 pounds, right? That's what it’s like. Try to bench press 300 pounds. Everyone can do that if they work out enough. It’s not impossible. I'd say 200 pounds because that's a little bit easier to imagine, you know? Two-‐hundred pounds, everyone can lift 200 pounds if they train. No big deal. But if you go straight into the gym and you try to lift 200 pounds, you're going to hurt yourself. You will and you'll give up. You'll burn yourself out. You won't be able to continue.

So we're going to kind of go over how to get through these different weight

increases over time. Do not jump ahead unless you've successfully completed the step before it. Period. That's my only real rule for this. We're going to break it up into 2—3 major different sections. One is daytime, talking to women during the daytime. The second one is talking to women at nighttime and the third one is killing approach anxiety. That's sort of the steroids bit that I'm going to give you that's going to put you—give you an unfair advantage to the rest of the guys that you run into.

So let's start out with the daytime. Now the difference between meeting

women sort of as people would say day game versus night game for guys, the difference between—the big difference is actually interesting in how it actually changes our psychology. During the daytime, we feel like we can't hide as much and so we feel the desire and need to be more direct. It’s not just us as men. It’s women as well. Everyone feels this way. This is why you don't see women walking around with low-‐cut shirts as much during the daytime as you will at nighttime.

Also we associate nighttime with quiet, safe vulnerability, meaning that I can be

in a corner by myself in the dark and I don't have everyone staring at me, looking at me, judging me, right, because no one can really see me very well. So one of the best examples of vulnerability, sort of quiet vulnerability is sex. Sex is a great way to be vulnerable, it’s an extremely vulnerable act, and it’s—I'm not saying quiet as in not loud sex, but I mean as in no one else can really see it. You're kind of hiding during sex at nighttime. You can't look over—they can't look over and see the look on your face every second. You're not going to be as self-‐conscious because the lights are out typically, when you're having sex at nighttime.

So that's one of the reasons why at nighttime we all go for sex because we know

that we can hide things about ourselves whenever we're being vulnerable. So we're trying to save ourselves from being super, super vulnerable or revealing ourselves all at one time.

So this is interesting and then that changes our dynamic completely whenever

we interact with people. Women are expecting something different during the daytime than they are expecting at nighttime, especially if they're at a bar or something. So if you're under 21 as we go through this process, you're going to have to find a sort of different environment to continue this second part of this training, but I'll go…

Brad: It would probably be like parties and stuff. Joshua: Yeah, parties could be, but those are kind of difficult because there aren't as

many, so you're going to have to plug yourself into it somehow or go to shows or something. You'll have to find something.

Brad: There's a lot of late-‐night coffee shops too, I guess, too. Joshua: Yeah, yeah, absolutely, but in a coffee shop, again, the lights are on and it’s

bright. Brad: That's true. Joshua: So in that environment, you're going to be more like—it’s going to be more like

day game. So the first thing you're going to be doing, if you're just coming out of a breakup and you need to sort of get back in the swing of things or you're still trying to get over your ex, take a book, preferably something like Dan Dennick’s book, Over Her Overnight, I believe is his book and take that and go to a public place and read it. Don't read it in your house by yourself.

So this is the first step, so you can actually start to get back in the game while

you're still getting over your ex. Go to a place like a coffee shop that's popular. I mean every single town in the U.S. pretty much has a Starbucks. If it doesn't, go to someplace that's public that you can—at a park, anything, sit there and read it there.

The reason why you want to do it is because you want to put yourself in a

situation where you realize other people are interacting around you. This is going to sort of expose your—that part of your brain to interaction again, sort of like walking into a gym and picking up and just lifting the bar on a bench press machine.

Alright, I'm just warming my muscle up here. I'm just trying to get this thing

going to the point where I know blood flows to this part of my body and I know that my body’s starting to get a realization that, “Okay, we're about to go into some training here so I need to start paying attention to this part of my body. I need to start sending extra blood there and extra oxygen.” And your body naturally does that whenever you work out.

So what you want to do is for that part of your brain, that sort of neural

pathway, exercise it by going out into public whenever you're reading. So as you're reading either my material or someone like Dan Dennick’s material, you want to make sure that you are in a public place that you're doing it so that people are there and you're getting used to interacting with people, even if you're not talking to them. You just used to them being around.

Once you're able to sit in a public place and read and you feel totally like you're

part of the environment, like this is comfortable for you, this is normal for you, now that may take a while for some guys, but whenever you feel that way, no matter when that is, move on to the next step.

The next step is going out to—basically during the daytime to talk to other guys

who are your age, so not women, just guys who are your age. No matter what age you are, just go to a place where you can see people and they're standing

around, they're not doing much. Coffee shop is a good place to do this. You don't have to sit down with them and have a conversation heart-‐to-‐heart or anything. The goal is to talk with them until you can make jokes with them almost as soon as you walk up. That's what you want to do. With guys your age, you want to be able to walk up and make a joke as soon as you walk up. Not like, “Hey, did you hear about the priest and rabbi who walked into a bar?” Not like that, not like that, knock-‐knock joke. But say something light and kind of funny.

Like if you're standing and someone’s freaking out, you might turn to the guy

next to you and go, “Somebody give that man a cookie.” That would be a joke that you’d make. When you can make a joke to guys who are your age consistently as soon as you walk up without any interaction, then you can move on to the next step.

Let me tell you why this is important in the first place. There's a lot of sort of

psychology that's backing why it’s important to be able to walk up to a guy and make a joke with him. But one reason is because it’s getting you introduced to the idea that you have a stage that you have to explore, which is banter, right?

But you're not using banter with attractive women. You're using banter with

guys, guys who are your age and attractive women both desire and need the same process in the beginning of interaction and that is light-‐hearted banter, like jokes, basically. And that light-‐hearted banter is what allows us as men and attractive women both to disarm themselves.

So you want to make sure that you practice disarming the people that you're

with by being able to make jokes. Now if it takes you a month to do this, then it takes you a month to do it. It’s how it is. If you can't make jokes with guys as soon as you walk up, there's no way in hell you're going to be able to continue. You have to be able to do this. So just keep that in mind. If you do want to get to the point where you can attract any woman you want and walk up and be really good, you have to be able to walk up to a guy you've never met before who’s your age and make a joke, like something kind of brief.

So that's your only goal. So as you go through your day, during the daytime, you

want to make sure that you're focusing on that. And when you get to where you can do 3, 4, 5 in a row without having a negative response, then move on to the next step.

The next step after that is talking to unattractive women, right? So then you're

going to start doing something with unattractive women. Instead of bantering with unattractive women, which you don't want to do because it will attract them, instead you want to practice going into rapport with unattractive women, meaning having deep and meaningful conversations with unattractive women. That's really crucial.

So skip banter all together with these women because otherwise you'll actually attract them and then you'll have a problem on your hands. Skip banter altogether. Don't make any jokes. Walk up to women and start talking to unattractive women until you can go in rapport with them almost instantly. Like, “Hey, I saw you reading this book. What book is this? I'm kind of curious because I have a book that I'm reading right now, but I'd really love to get recommendations from people.” That's it. That's a rapport question, something that's not a joke. Brad, did you have something to say?

Brad: Yeah, I was just going to say what would be the best question that you think to

ask—I mean that sort of answered it, just kind of make an observation about something about them and just kind of asking them a question about it?

Joshua: Yeah, so imagine—you've ever seen—so, okay, doing this with unattractive

women is great. Doing it with attractive women is a fucking terrible thing to do. So have you ever seen a guy and Brad, you and I actually know a guy, I'm not going to say his name on here, but you and I know a guy who used you used to live with who does this same thing with all the women he meets. I've seen him do it with a lot of women since I've been here and I've seen him—basically what he does is he walks up and he starts talking about commonalities immediately and he thinks that's what attraction is.

So I'm never going to correct him because he’s never going to ask me, but—and

plus he’s not paying me. He couldn't pay me enough really to do it. But he does this all the time and guys who do this all the time are supplicating. They're trying to find something—it’s kind of sneaky. Most guys, what they do, they try to find some commonality with the hot girl and then they're expecting that this hot girl is just going to go, “Oh my God, wow, we have so much in common. Let's have sex now and let's date.” But they don't. They don't do that.

Unattractive women will talk to you for a long period of time and hang out with

you and be your friends if you just go up and you start sort of building rapport with them. And what guys do is they receive positive responses from unattractive women and they think that attractive women have the exact same thing. No, they don't, dude.

Attractive women have way more options than unattractive women do, so

they're not desperate. They're not going to jump straight into it. But you need to get used to talking to—talking in women speak, basically. So one thing that you would do is yeah, for example, the book thing is a great one. Another one would be like if they're walking near a campus and you're like, “Hey, I'm kind of curious if you go to school here.

I'd like to ask you a question about it because I'm thinking about,”—walking

with them, walking the same direction, “I'm thinking about going here, “ or “My friend is thinking about going here.” Whatever, “Do they have a really good law program?” Whatever, it doesn't really matter just as long as you ask them

something, but you want to go into rapport. You don't want to joke around with them. You want to go straight into rapport.

So whenever you can go into rapport with unattractive women, you're ready to

take the next step. So this is the fourth step in this process. There's only one more before you graduate to the next level, which is nighttime.

So the fourth step in this process is talking to really old people. I know that

sounds kind of out of place, maybe really old people should be earlier. The reason why you want to talk to really old people is because they're probably the hardest people to find something extremely interesting about and sit and talk to about that thing. Now they have great, amazing stories with amazing, interesting parts of their lives, but most of us don't look at them as—if we're going out looking for women, we're not going to look at a hot—sorry, not a hot, but a hot old lady, sorry.

Brad: Well, some of us might. Joshua: Exactly, old cougar hunting. But we're not going to look at an old woman and go,

“Oh man, I can totally see what's interesting about you.” Or, “Tell me something. I want to find what's interesting about this woman.” This is sort of the step right before we are able to do sort of the magical process, the thing that sort of gets us to be really, really good with women and that is finding the interesting thing in everybody that we meet.

Now this is really, really, really important. The reason why this is important is

because you have to create a belief that you approach everybody that you're interested in, period, that you think is interesting, period. And that means old people, young people, unattractive, guys, girls, doesn't matter, right? You need to approach everybody that you're curious about.

So going up to older people, really old people especially and finding the thing

that's interesting about them is going to be a very valuable skillset. So again, this is the fourth step. You want to talk to old people until you can find something interesting about them and something you are genuinely interested in and then talk about that for a minute and then split, right? If you can't do that in the beginning, then you need to keep trying until you can.

Now let's imagine that you were sort of—you broke up with your ex. It was a

long time coming. You're not really caught up on her too much, but you just wanted to—want this information anyway. Then here's what you could do. You could spend 5 minutes reading in a public place until you know that you're comfortable.

You could go up to guys your age, talk to them and make a joke, first if you

make the joke immediately, and there's no problem doing it. You're not rusty at all, move on to the next step. This could literally take—you could go through steps 1 through 4 in 20 minutes if you want to. But you have to be honest with

yourself. If you're not comfortable in one of these steps, you have to sit there until you are. This is very crucial.

If you lie to yourself about it and you just push through and you come out the

other side, then you're not going to be happy, dude. It’s not going to work. You're going to get really shitty results and you don't want that.

So that's the fourth stage, the fourth step is talking to really old people and

talking to them and trying to find one interesting thing about them, just one interesting thing. And as soon as you find that you can walk up to an old person, find that interesting thing about them over and over again consistently, then you're ready to move on to Step 5, which is the last step in this first level of understanding—building up your social muscle, and that is talking to attractive women during the daytime.

Now the goal for talking to attractive women during the daytime is to be at a

place where you can talk to them and you can banter only for 5 minutes in the very beginning of the interaction. So your goal is to keep talking to attractive women during the daytime until you can banter with them and joke around with them for 5 whole minutes. Once you can do that consistently, you're ready to move on.

So most guys I would say are not at that level yet, right? They're not at a level

where they can walk up to a woman during the daytime, who’s really attractive, joke around with her for 5 minutes, and then split. They don't have to do anything else, just joke around for 5 minutes and be light-‐hearted. If you can't do that, then you need to start by talking to really old people right now because you're not at that level yet.

It’s really important that as you walk up and as you build these piece by piece,

your social muscle is getting more and more used to interaction again and the different nuances of interaction. Now again, I've broken this up into daytime and nighttime because during the daytime your social muscle has a different level of defense, so does everyone else’s, a different level of defense during the daytime than it does at nighttime.

So what you want to do is be able to use your social muscle no matter what the

defense level is. If it’s daytime, you want to be able to use it then and at nighttime the same thing. But at nighttime there are more defenses, that's why at nighttime it’s sort of a Level 2 approach.

So those are the 5 steps for Level 1. If you can do all 5 of those, consistently do

all 5 of those, you're ready to move on to Level 2. Is that clear, Brad? Is this all making sense?

Brad: Totally clear. This is awesome and I feel like it’s a really, really important thing

to tell guys that you don't have to start right out, like, okay, you want to get

back into the game. You don't have to go out to a nightclub and start picking up hot chicks right away, you know?

Joshua: Yeah, don’t do that. Brad: That’s going to be scary as hell to somebody who is too vulnerable and still

working – especially if you’re working to the process of getting over that breakup. There’s going to be a lot of vulnerability there and something like that is going to be really terrifying and like you said, what that’s going to do is just create a longer period of time for them to actually get feel comfortable talking to girls again. So this is like, this is awesome men.

Joshua: Yeah. Okay cool. Yeah. There are a lot of mistakes that I’ve made in the past,

that I see a lot of the guys making and skipping this process. In fact, a lot of the professionals that I know don’t do this and I can say that if you go through each one of the stages and you really set though each one of the stage and you come up the other side of this. You’ll be better with women than 99% of the guys in the world just by going through this process. Not by learning anything else. Not by learning body language stuff or anything else that you thought you are poor concepts, nothing, just by going through this process.

So I’m hoping to get you to that place from zero to sixty, like I said because I can

see a lot of guys skip over this stuff and to me that I went through myself and I did it slowly because I didn’t know that I could speed it up, but the cool thing about this is that once, you know, technically what’s happening is that instead thinking about like your social muscle, what’s really happening is you’re creating what’s called neuropathways. You’re creating new neuropathways in your brain and whenever you do something new; your brain has to curve a new neuropathway, sort of a thought highway, right.

And in order to connect a thought to a memory to an action, whatever, your

brain has to have this neuropathways already built. So what you’re doing is your creating a direct highways, straight highway from one place – from point A to point B, all right, instead of like jumping allover your brain trying to swerve around and taking forever to get there.

So as you go through this process, you’re neuropathway is being reinforced. It’s

like adding lanes to a freeway and more and more information and more power can shoot back and forth to this neuropoathway, so if your social muscles speak so to speak is built up by you going through different processes and you go at certain levels up overtime, then you have the ability to later on – if you let this all fall to shit like if you don’t work out anymore for a while, these neuropathways don’t go away.

They stay there, but you don’t use them as much. So you have this called

muscle memory, right? Like for example somebody who has lost a hundred pounds and then gained a hundred pounds, it will take them usually less than 50% at a time to lose it again than it did the first time because they have muscle

memory. Their muscles will build up faster so it buildup one time and it then it gets easier and easier for the rest of your life after that. So the first time is going to be a bit difficult. It’s like a workup routine. So you got to submit to if fully and commit to make sure that you do it, but after that, like I said, whenever I leave – if I were to be single right now, it will probably take me probably a day or sometimes even a few hours to get back into it because I have all these neuropathways already created and they are already submitted for me. It’s already like a 12-‐lane mega highway for me because it did it for so long.

Brad: Right. Joshua: Most guys have a trail that’s really winding that follows the river and that’s the

reason why most guys don’t have as much of an ability that I do the step forward and really curve this forward and rock it. Did you know that in the US, most of the roads that were the freeways or the roads that we’re using to travel at a time, when cars are first invented, most of the roads are old cow paths, do you know that?

Brad: I didn’t know. Joshua: Cows would walk naturally that walked in a certain line. They walked in the

path with least resistance, that’s what cows do. So as they walked overtime it created this thin path where cows had walked and then people started following paths of horse and buggies and then eventually when we started needing roads, most of the time they just paved over these paths, right. So they’re really super winding weird inefficient roads that would go swerving all over the place because it was following the path of least resistance.

So we ended up doing with freeways in the US, is we got an aerial view and then

we draw a straight line, we plowed through everything that was on the way like going over the mountain or through the mountain in a tunnel. Go over a river instead of fallowing the river for months and then going…

Brad: Right. Joshua: And that when we made freeways or superhighways and that sort of what

you’re doing with your brain. You’re recreating this neuropathway in a way that makes it a superhighway and makes it really easily to act and actually, the super highway also control your emotions so you won’t have any negative response or weird feelings around them either whenever you meet them some. That’s the first part of level one.

Level two, we can get to it. This is where Mario also encounters fireballs spitting

flowers in this level. Brad: Right.

Joshua: So, at level two is all about nighttime. So the first thing that you won’t be able to do in level two, the first step is want to be able to go into a bar with a friend of yours and don’t talk to anybody but your friend, that’s it. Just go in a bar, sit there, your goal is to be comfortable not talking to anybody but your friend just hanging up, right. If you can go onto a bar and you can sit with your friend and not talk to anyone then you get to go onto the next step. By the way, there were six steps in this process for this level two, just to kind of give you ahead of.

The second one is, you want to go to a bar with a friend and only talk to other

guys, that’s it. So you’re going to be talking to other dudes who are at the bar. Your friend is there and between like a conversation with your one friend, you are going to turn over and be like, “hey, blah, blah, blah, blah.” Talk to a guy for a second just for a minute and then turn back to your friend and again, your goal here is just be able to joke around with this guy, right. Make a quick joke and turn around back again.

Whenever you can do that back and forth, it may only take a day or one evening

for you to figure that just how to do it. So if only takes you one evening, great. Know you’re done; you don’t have to worry about it. You move on to the next step.

Brad: A lot of guys are always wondering like what specifically you would say in the

situations, but what I’m getting from this process is that as you start off from going out to a coffee shop during the day and not really talking to anybody and then just talking to guys your ages that by the time you get to the nighttime to this is level two, you won’t have to think what to say right?

Joshua: Yeah. That’s exactly the point. If you’re at a bar at nighttime and you’re saying

to yourself and your question is, what do I say to this girl then you should not be at the bar at nighttime. You should be somewhere else or if you’re at the bar you should be talking to guys. You should be sticking – you’re not at the level where you’re able to go to a bar at nighttime and talk to chicks. You need to pull it back some. I have to go to the same thing dude, I did not skip this. I did the exact same thing for me and every time that I won’t get back into it, I go to the same process.

Brad: A guy asking what do I say to a hot girl at a club is basically like saying, like what

10 reps to I need to do to have a six-‐pack overnight or something like that. Joshua: No, not even. It’s more like saying, how do I lift this 500-‐pound bar. Brad: Yeah. Joshua: No. You don’t dude, that’s the point. You do not lift that 500-‐pound bar. You

can try but it won’t work. You’re going to hurt yourself. It just doesn’t work or you can make it so that you use other spotters and do 90% of work and you do 10%, that’s fine. So if you are asking that question and I don’t want to be too harsh on it and everybody here because I know that a lot a guys, “Well I want to

talk to hot chicks,” of course you do, so do I, so does everybody. If you’re asking that question though, you skip some of these steps. Go back and do these steps, that way that this is simple. It will be easy if you go back into the steps so keep that in mind.

So you’re going to talk to the guys and makes jokes with them a little bit with

your friend there and that’s all you have to do. That’s all your goal. So you can make the entire night out of that or you can make half an evening out of it whatever you want.

The next step is kind of a big leak. So this is where a lot of the guys get tripped

off. Go to a bar, buy yourself and don’t talk to anybody, just have a good time. Hang out, don’t talk to anybody. Your goal is not to talk to anybody. You can talk to people but your goal is not to do that. You’re goal is just go to a bar by yourself until you feel comfortable. Like just get into environment of a bar, really understand that environment. I would just like, go to bar, sit at the bar, imagine you’re like, in a movie that you’re like the broken down, washed up hero in a movie that’s sitting at a bar drinking drinks right? That’s fine.

Brad: The Wrestler? Joshua: Ah, not that bad. Don’t get drunk or anything, but just go and enjoy the

environment like enjoy the sit at the bar, rollover things in your head, just kind of like you can talk to the bartender. You can just think about stuff and whatever it is. Just go there and hang out. You can just order water if you want to, whatever.

Joshua: Stay there until you can feel comfortable, you know, we are like okay, I got this,

I don’t feel weird, right. I don’t feel weird anymore or out of place. I am just like a guy at the bar. You have to be able to do that before you can to a bar and talk to chicks, trust me. It is not going to work, otherwise. So, go to a bar by yourself, it is step 3, and don’t talk to anybody. Your goal is not to talk to anybody. Now again, as I go this process and I say, what to do for that step, again keep in mind that is just your goal. If you something beyond that and you feel comfortable doing something beyond that, you can, but you can make sure that you are comfortable at every single step, and that is your goal, so just be comfortable there.

If you go to a bar by yourself and in five minutes you feel comfortable, then spend the rest of the time on the next step. Right, let us go ahead and jump straight to the next step. The next step is going to a bar by yourself and only talking to guys, that’s it. So as you do this again, you are going to be joking around just like you did in the earlier stages of, what was that, that was step 2 on level 1 there, it is talking to guys your age during the daytime and making jokes, you are going to want to be able to sort of be lighthearted and joke around with guys who are in a bar when you are by yourself, when you do not go to a bar with anybody else, that is the next level, next step rather. So once

you are comfortable doing that, this is where things get a little bit different, then you can add something to the equation. Once you are comfortable talking to guys, you can talk to guys and unattractive girls at the bar. Whenever you are comfortable talking to guys and unattractive girls, then you are going to be talking to guys, unattractive girls and attractive girls, equal parts of each one, and that sort of the sixth step of level two, is being able to go to a bar, talk to guys, talk to unattractive girls and talk to attractive girls, all in equal amount. This is really, really important, because what happens when you get to the sixth step of level two, this is where you are going, you are talking to everybody at the bar, your brain then creates and submits a belief, that belief is, I am the kind of guy who talks to everybody, right. I talk to every single person that I am interested in, that is whenever that belief is fully submitted.

Now, you can stop there if you want to, that is the end of level two. Level two is like, that is like a really, speaking pretty good, like you are life of the party, you are going to hook up a lot of chicks because of this, you are going to be sort of like, you are going to have lots of phone numbers, you are going to get, see, really great responses from within, it is very a powerful process that you will go through, but if you want the steroids that will give you an unfair advantage, you know, over the rest of the guys, then here is what you do, throughout your daytime as well, after all that, after you have gone through the daytime stuff, the level one stuff, and the nighttime stuff and level two, then, you know, you are able to go to a bar, feel comfortable, not just by yourself, but comfortable talking to guys, unattractive girls and attractive girls all at the same time in equal parts of each one. Then from that point on, throughout the day, every time you see an attractive woman, approach her, approach every single attractive woman you see, now this is funny because most of the guys will teach you, if you like, O! you want get over approach anxiety, they just tell you to do that last thing and that is it, that is a terrible idea, I mean you can do it, just to kind of get used to little things, but you are going to get a lot of rejections, a whole lot of rejections. If you are willing to go through that rejection and keep going until it works, then you can start there if you want to, but most guys are not willing to do that, it hurts pretty bad.

Brad: That is the very, the fear of that rejection itself is the thing that holds them back

from talking to anybody. Joshua: Exactly, and that is sort of, you know that is sort of a problem, is that, you know,

especially in this industry is that guys will go on and talk to a 100 girls, O! yes, sure you can go and talk to a 100 girls and if you make it a game, it is even easier, like oh, I got 50, I go to get 50 more, I am going to try to get 10 today, you know, and it is like marking down in a book, that can be pretty fun you know, and you can go through that process.

In fact that is like a pretty exciting game to play, because it gets you to improve at least a little bit through this process, but it not the most organic and easiest way to do this, it is one of the hardest ways to do it, and it is like working uphill, some of the smartest business people I know, say, instead of being a Salmon and trying to swim upstream, you want to be a Tuna, and you want to find the current is going in the direction you want to go and ride with it, you know.

Brad: Yes. Joshua: Salmons never make money. They don’t. Tunas make money, but that was a

fish. That analogy steps out of the fish there, but you know, if they are trying to go against the grain the entire way and it being very difficult, go with it, find if the current is moving in the direction that you want to go and go with that, that is the fastest, easiest, most effective and smartest way to about attracting women, is to do this way, is to start with your brain naturally processes this up. If you try to use it, if you try to go and get some grain otherwise, it is not the smartest way to do it. It will change your life because it will be really stressful, but it won’t get you there any faster. It will take a lot longer and it will be a lot more painful, you know. I am not going to say that is not a great experience to have, I think it is a fantastic experience to have.

Brad: It is the perfect experience for some people. Joshua: Yes. I think everyone should experience it once, I think. Where you try to swim

upstream, you got to do that, because then you can’t really appreciate the flow of the current, you really can’t. You know, if you go out, you try to a 100 women, and you do it and talk to a 100 women and then you come back and you go through this process, it is going to be a piece of cake for you. So it is really important to know that, I mean it is like, it is such a powerful process. So, that is about the steroids. The steroids, after you have gotten through level two and you are able to go to a bar, talk to women who are attractive, guys that are there, and unattractive girls, all the same without any difference between all of them, you know, of course you are not going to be bantering as much with unattractive girls, you are bantering with guys and attractive girls.

During the daytime, you are able to walk up to attractive women and banter with them for five minutes in the beginning, you are able to go on rapport with attractive women and then joke around with dudes and then find something interesting about old people who, you know, we typically tend to dismiss and they are like things that, they are people who get in the way for the most part, for most people in the world an old person is someone who drives slow or walks slow or is clueless, right, and we do not look at them as being wells of knowledge, like they are, they have amazing amount of knowledge and they are super, super interesting. They have lived way longer than we have, you know. So, we have to be a little look past, or immediate assumption about somebody and find something interesting. Now, here is what is cool, whenever you go through the process of

approaching women throughout the daytime, any attractive woman you see, if you approach her, you won’t be running up to her, you brain won’t be thinking, you are running up to this chick because she is hot, what if she rejects you, it won’t be thinking that, it will go, “oh! Another interesting person, just like all the other hundreds of interesting people you have been talking to lately, right.” It won’t have any kind of red flag that throws up and you won’t have any approach anxiety, none. You will kill your approach anxiety. You will not have to worry about feeling nervous walking up to hot women anymore, but you have to maintain that, again if you go like five months without doing any of this shit at all or very little stuff, you are going to have start back wherever you left off, whatever feels most comfortable for you, start there and move on to the next level and you can go back up through this process again, and you know the more you go through the process of building up, and you know building up and going through this system over and over at level one and level two and then the next level basically. As you go this process, the faster you can go through it, the easier it gets to actually go from 0 to 60 and get back in the game. So, that is sort of my one to two punch there, I wanted to throw on, this sort of extra little, you know, the extra bonus thing that lot of guys don’t know about killing approach anxiety, but at the end of the day, it is how you create a belief that you are kind of guy who approaches everybody that you are either interested in or attracted to, and your brain will absolutely believe that, it will submit that belief and you will not have any kind of question in your mind, that is true, if you do this, because of this process, and then when that happens and you do approach really beautiful women you will have absolutely no question about whether or not you are going to go up and do it.

You will have no hesitation, you will have no nervousness, you will have no stuttering, you will have no “what do I say” kind of stuff, you know, what do I say to this girl whenever I walk up to her, all this stuff will be taken care of, not because you have like a list of things to say, that never really works, you are going to have it stuffed in your back pocket just in case, but that is not really the way you are looking for, instead you will have experience that you brain can pull on, you need to work these neuro pathways again, it is going to pull up stuff that worked from other conversations that had happened recently and say those things, you know, it is all trouble, you know, always banter lines. If you do not use these banter with every woman that you see then they are not going to be there in your brain for you to access later, you have to have those things in your brain ready to access, and this is the way to ensure that you do that to make for sure that whenever you walk into a woman you know what to say, you are not nervous, you brain is not going haywire, and that you are able to actually attract her, that is how you get over it.

Brad: That is pretty powerful, and you know that you mentioned earlier, you know,

after going through the sort of harder part of the breakup and you know using someone’s advice like, like Dan Danix, you are going to be, like after you get

through this sort of painful process, I guess of, you know, actually breaking up and sort of getting your place, your mind into a place of where you are ready. Again, this is going to be the perfect formula to getting to where you want to be, which is, you know, making new friends everywhere you go, I mean that, that’s a big thing. You want to feel like you’re capable of more you had with that relationship.

Joshua: Yeah, and you actually are capable of more, there’s no question about that.

There’s absolutely no question of that. Brad: And as you go through this process, I was just thinking about this. You are going

to be making tons of friends. Everyone – from the unattractive girls, to the guys, to even the old people -‐-‐ are going to be your friends and, you know, you’re also going to be meeting tons of women in the process. It’s just like this amazing life transformation right here that you just outlined.

Joshua: You know, one of the things I did, and I went through this process by the way,

which is how I know that it works, one of the things I did, and I don’t think I told anyone about this, either in a call or in a recording. Is that, I spent about 3 weeks living with homeless people. Did you know this?

Brad: No. I’ve wanted to do this, though. Quite honestly, I’ve wanted to do this.

Please, please tell me more. Joshua: Well, one of the things that I did. Well, here’s what happened first. When I first

walked up to these homeless people, I met a guy where I lived in the town that I lived in, who was basically autistic. He was this homeless guy. I started talking to him and he’d tell me what he was thinking. I just sat down and started talking with him. Turned out he was doing really complicated math in his head, all day long. Turns out that’s all that he was doing. He was determining arcs on bridges and stuff. Like, staring at bridges and just staring.

And he was talking to himself. But as I got closer and sat with him, I could hear him computing. And he was doing really complicated math. And he had this massive beard, and he looked like, you know. And I was like, “hey can I get you something?” And he was like “a banana would be great.” He didn’t ask for money, he didn’t ask for anything else. So I started spending some time hanging out with him and then I started hanging out with some of these other homeless people around there, and when they found out I wasn’t going to give them money, they started being real with me. It was interesting to see their interactions with each other. I mean, some of them are freaking psycho, you know, so I kind of kept my distance. But every day I went down and there were a core group of people that were really cool. I’d just go down and talk to them, and you know, a couple of guys would never stop asking for money and they were kind of annoying. And I was like, “dude, I’m not going to give you any money. But I am going to

talk to you, and hang out with you for a little while, and keep you company.” And they would try to sell me every single time. “Oh, let’s go to an ATM, I really need this. My daughter’s sick.” Like making up stories and shit. I was like, come on, you know. So I wouldn’t hang out with those people so much. But as soon as I got past that, though, I was able to hang out with these people and it was really amazing. But, at the same time, it was pretty dangerous. I did it most of the time during the daytime, and I would slip out at night. And go somewhere else, because I didn’t want to sleep on the street, and you know, my parents worry about me, because, you know, I was still going to high school at the time, you know.

Brad: Wow. Joshua: And I learned a lot from that process, man. I learned to dig deeper into

someone’s story to really figure out what they got in it. And it helped me to understand a lot of people. And people I wouldn’t normally talk to or invest any interaction in, and things like that. And people we typically look down to. And, I feel pretty good now, like if I walk by a homeless person and I don’t give them any money, it’s probably because some of the homeless people I met, most of the homeless people that I met were actually pretty shiesty. They weren’t good people. T

They weren’t trying to help other people out. But, there was a handful that I ended up meeting that were just really, really awesome. And some of them had mental disorders and that’s why they couldn’t interact in public, with people. And some of them were just down on their luck, they were just so depressed they couldn’t get out of it. So they just gave up, and it was really interesting. I just learned to judge people not so much. It was really cool for me. I definitely carried that into my study with attracting women, you know.

Brad: That’s really part of the lesson you talked about with talking with old people, of

finding the interesting thing about everybody. Joshua: Yes, exactly. Brad: About looking for value in everybody you come across. Joshua: Yeah, and start with people who it is hardest to see value in. If it’s really difficult

for you to find something valuable in an old person, then start with old people. You know? Find something about old people that you can actually understand, that you can find valuable, that you can find interesting, you know. And, if that is the case and you can do that, then you can do that with anybody. Because it’s important that whenever you walk up to a chick that you’re not going, “ah, she’s hot, that’s why I’m interested.” You have to be going, what else is there, what else is there to do this girl. I have to find something else before I walk up. Because if you just walk up to a girl and you go, “you’re hot,” that works in about 3% of women.

You know? And they’ll go, “thank you!” And usually they’re not very attractive. But that’s how it is. So you make sure – really good looking women get really tired of men being interested in them just because of their looks. So you have to find something else better than that. And you want to start out -‐-‐ and I am very strong in the idea, and a very strong believer in the idea of training hard and fight easy. Train hard, fight easy. Always. Train in an area that would be very difficult for you and then when it comes time to actually use this concept, it will be simple compared to trying to find the interesting thing about a senile, old person. Yeah, so, that’s what I found. And very, very powerful. So definitely go out and do that. If you’ve written this down, hopefully you’ve written this down…

Brad: (interrupting) I wrote it down. Joshua: Very good, I’m glad you did. Take it step-‐by-‐step and go through. Figure out

where you are. Try, figure out what you’re working on now. Whatever the thing is that you think you’re working on now, usually you’re at the step before that. You know? So, whatever it is you can imagine yourself being bad at, go to the step right before that and just work on that thing. So, for example, if you really don’t feel comfortable going to a bar and talking to attractive women and you really don’t feel comfortable talking to unattractive women -‐-‐ let’s say you walked into a bar and tried it and weren’t very good at it.

Then, kick it all the way back to only talking to guys. Just sort of work it backward until you figure out something that you can do. Most guys can’t walk into a bar and feel comfortable by themselves. They can learn to do that. But they don’t know how to do that immediately. So, even that step is usually difficult for guys. I really strongly suggest that you start in level 1 and then you move on from level 1 to level 2. Don’t start on level 2 like most guys want to. Because, when you skip it you’re not going to see the results that you want. You can skip it if you want to, but you’re not going to see the results. That’s how it is, so. If you don’t want to it to work, then skip it. That’s kind of how it is. So, take all of those. Start wherever you think you should start here. Assess yourself, and be really honest about the assessment. And then, just move onto the next stage. I am really interested to see how this affects you. If it does work really well, just hop into the members area in the Tao of Badass, if you’ve already bought the Tao of Badass, hop into the members area and comment and let us know how it’s been going for you. Because not every guy who is a member is going to see this, is going to listen to this audio training session here, and is not going to get this one-‐on-‐one Mastermind session like you did, so hop on there. Tell us, tell me how it’s been working and I’ll respond back and everyone will see it dude. And I think it’ll inspire a lot of people. So if you haven’t gotten the Tao of Badass, get that now. I mean, you can go on the website taoofbadass.com and click on the book tab at the top and get a copy, because you need to get

into the members area. Because you’ll get ongoing coaching, forever, as long as you’re in there. So absolutely do it. It will sort of help you take it to the next level. So, thanks for being on this call with me Joshua, I appreciate it, man

Brad: Yeah, thanks for all the awesome information man. Joshua: And guys, look forward to seeing how this helps you. Any questions at all, post

them in the member’s area and I’ll be more than happy to get back to you and help you take it to the next level. I can’t wait to see how it helps you get over and really take ownership of your approach anxiety. And I’m looking forward to talking to you again. Thanks a lot.

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