Island Child Magazine, Issue: Winter 2010/11
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2 / Island Child Magazine / www.islandchildmag.com / winter 2010 -- 11
Mom-Made on Vancouver Island
resources for pregnancy & parenting
Mortgages for Mommies keeping debt
in checkBringing sexyBack!
Winter 2010 - 11 Volume 6 Issue 24...brought to you by a proud mommy
of an Island Child...
Winter 2010 - 11 Volume 6 Issue 24
Ella & Lisa
islandresources for pregnancy & parenting
Feature StoriesPg 3 Baby Molly Needs our HelpPg 4 Innie or Outie?Pg 5 Toddlers and ImaginationPg 6 Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3 ...Pg 8 Relationship Rules for FacebookPg 10 Bringing Sexy BackPg 12 Divorcing, With KidsPg 13 Family Photography in the LightPg 14 New Year ChallengePg 16 Home Ownership for Mommies Pg 17 Bratty Brothers Make Unbelievable UnclesPg 19 The Complaint Department
In Every IssuePg 7 Todays Must HavesPg 9 Whats New in BusinessPg 9 Mortgages for MommiesPg 11 FitnessPg 15 Spotlight on BusinessPg 21 Resource Directory
on the cover
Lila, 6 monthsPhoto by Mary Jane Howland
COVER PHOTOGRAPHYMary Jane Howland Photographywww.maryjanescamera.ca
WEBMASTERAlisha BakerInnnersight Multimediawww.innersight.ca
GRAPHICSLindsey-Lea MercerIdentity Graphic Services250-732-5505
Michael LahayGecko Green Living Ltd.250-537-1151
CONTRIBUTORSSarah Binab, Ann Douglas, Aly Fedokowski, Janine Fernandes-Hyden, Alison Gunn, Alisa Harrison, Sandra Sander, Roxanne Weech, Erica Wells, Jennifer Wolf
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Distribution is from Victoria to Comox Valley with a mid-island centre. Subscriptions available, 4 issues per year for $10 delivered to your door.
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Material appearing herein may not be reproduced in print or electronically without written permission of the publisher, and without proper credit. Editorial opinions and viewpoints may not necessarily re ect those of the publisher.
2 / Island Child Magazine / www.islandchildmag.com / winter 2010 -- 11
COMING SOONCowichan Maternity Clinic at the Cowichan District Hospital
Opening in February 2011, the Cowichan Maternity Clinic will provide comprehensive care during pregnancy, labour and delivery, and up to six weeks post partum. Nine family physicians will staff this clinic, which will be adjacent to the Maternity ward. Referrals to the clinic can be made by your family physician.
Check back in the Spring issue to read all about the launch of this new clinic, which is much needed in the Cowichan Valley!
Baby Molly Needs our HelpCancer, at four weeks old?
When this story fi rst broke on December 26th, like every parent out there, the story touched my heart. Cancer at four weeks old. How is this possible? How does this happen? Why does this happen? These are questions posed to me as my 6-year-old daughter watched the news story with me. Questions that I dont have answers to tell her. What can we do? That was the only question I had an answer to. We can help them.
To recap this story, a young Victoria family received the devastating news on Christmas Eve that their previously healthy four-week old baby had leukemia. Molly was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia, a cancer of the white blood cells that was rapidly fi lling her body. Molly and her parents, Rebekah and David, were immediately fl own to BC Childrens Hospital in Vancouver. Once there, doctors began to work on little Molly, and tested her bone marrow and spinal fl uid to fi nd out more about the type of leukemia that was growing. She needed multiple IVs to carry medicine and fl uids. Because Mollys baby hands and arms are so tiny, doctors needed to perform emergency surgery to insert a tube directly into her chest for the IVs. Before the surgery, David and Rebekah held their tiny infant and said their goodbyes; the staff had told them how serious this was, and they knew they may never hold her little hands again.
Molly stabilized after surgery and the doctors started her on steroids, the fi rst stage of a long and painful chemotherapy regime designed to try to eradicate the leukemia that fi lled Mollys body.
Molly is one of the youngest leukemia patients in BC Childrens Hospitals history. Cure rates for leukemia have made huge advances in the past 20 years, however, Mollys leukemia has the genetic markers of a much more diffi cult leukemia to treat. This, along with her very young age, makes this an uphill battle.
When Mollys doctor met with David and Rebekah on Boxing Day, he told them that Molly will need to stay at Childrens for at least six months, and probably longer. Since Molly has four siblings under the age of seven, David and Rebekah have been told their family size will make it diffi cult to stay at Ronald McDonald House or other family support facilities. Rebekah is a stay-at-home mom and David is the sole fi nancial provider for his family. The fi nancial and emotional burden this family faces is unimaginable. Molly and her parents need your help. The costs will be staggering.
The family will have to set up a residence in Vancouver for the coming months, and pay for the many trips back and forth to the mainland. It is unlikely that David will be able to work, as the four children still need full time childcare outside of the hospital where David or Rebekah need to stay with Molly.
We live in an amazing community with tremendous love and support for families facing adversity, tragedy and illness. As a young parent myself, I can only imagine the heartache and fear that David and Rebekah are feeling. If every Island Child reader donates $1.00 to this family, we would collectively raise over $10,000. Dave and Rebekah have decided to donate any money not required to cover the familys expenses relating to Mollys treatment to the Childrens Hospital Foundation to help other children like Molly.
Mail or drop off a cheque (made to Molly Campbell Trust) to Canadian Western Bank, 1201 Douglas Street, Victoria, BC V8W 2E6 or visit Mollys website at www.molly-campbell.com and doante directly through a PayPal link.
Please, for just a moment, compare your Christmas with the one baby Molly and her family have had, and give a gift to those truly in need.
Island Child Magazine / www.islandchildmag.com / winter 2010 -- 11 / 3
Innie or Outie?: Janine Fernandes-Hyden
I need to ask a personal question that may require a bit of navel-gazing. Are you an innie or an outie? Heres a fascinating statistic: 75% of the people in the world are outies, which of course means that 25% are innies. These figures blow me away, Im not sure why, because outies tend to stick out ...
Belly buttons? No. Im talking about introverts and extroverts and how as parents, an understanding of this dimension of temperament can help us to better companion our children through life. The biggest misconception when it comes to introversion-extroversion is that it has to do with how social you are. In reality however, an extroverted person can be reserved in social situations while the most social person that you can think of might in fact be an introvert.
The main difference between introverts and extroverts is how they restore their energy source. A book entitled The Introvert Advantage by Marti Olsen Laney provides an effective analogy. Think of an introvert as a rechargeable battery - they renew themselves by resting and turning into their internal world of reflection. An extrovert on the other hand is like a solar panel - they become charged up by their external environment and refresh themselves by socializing, talking to people and engaging in activities.
How can you tell whether your child is an introvert or an extrovert? Laney suggests the following cues:
If your child is primarily introverted they will probably:* Watch and listen before joining an activity* Enjoy alone time in their room* Have a strong sense of personal space* Be private and may need to be asked what they are feeling or thinking* Speak after thinking things through
If your child is primarily extroverted they will probably:* Be energized by interactions and activities* Often volunteer what they are thinking of feeling
* Prefer time with others rather than time alone* Want to tell you about all their experiences and ideas immediately covering lots of topics* Think out loud.Now that you know, what can you do? If you have an introverted child:* Teach them how to recharge their battery* Build private time into their routine* Be a mindful mediator - if you are in a social situation and find that your childs eyes are glazing over or that they are becoming grouchy, entice them off to a more peaceful place.* Honour their need for reflection
If you have an extroverted child:* Make sure they have people with whom they can talk, including relationships outside of the family* Talk about personal space* Let them think out loud* Strike a balance between keeping them active while helping them to schedule the quiet and unstructured time that we all need in order to nurture our creative sides
Knowing whether your child is an introvert or extrovert is not meant to be a label, more a tool to better understand your childs needs and behaviours in order to respond in a more conscious and child-centered manner. So go ahead, nurture those natures._______