How to get a guy to like you

Trust me, don't be yourself.- Victoria Pesce -

Step 1Guys only like pretty girls and you're in luck because even if you're ugly, you can make yourself look pretty. Makeup is the solution.

You put as much makeup as you need to make sure you look as hot as the celebrity crush of your crush. Stalk his facebook to know who the celebrity crush your crush is crushing on.

Once you look like her, step one is done.

Step 2Now your probably thinking, I look like his celebrity crush but I don't have the same size boobs as his celebrity crush.

You have to ways of solving this problem.

1. If you are extremely dedicated, you can get boob implantations. (strongly recommended)

2.If you only want to sleep with him once, all you need is stuffing.

For solution number two, it's more complicated. You are trying to create an illusion of being hot because lets face it, you're not.

You will need a push up bra because all men love boobs. If a push up bra still isn't enough, buy a bra the size you know he likes and stuff it with whatever you find laying around the house. You can use a t-shirt, kleenex, blankets, popcorn, your cats fur laying around,... etc.

Step 3

You need a booty? This step is as easy as step 2. You just stuff that trunk with whatever you find in the house.

Now you have the

look...How do you act

around your crush?

Step 4Being yourself didn't work in the first place... SO WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT BE YOURSELF. You're probably annoying and not as funny as you think you are.

So whatever you feel like you should do in a situation, do the complete opposite.

If you feel like you should tell a joke, don't do it.

If you feel like you should give your point of view on a specific topic, don't do it.

Basically, agree with everything he says.

Step 5Make sure you have a cute laugh. Practice it a couple of times. An ugly laugh is a turn off.

Practice your laugh a couple of times in the mirror to make sure it's an attractive laugh.

SIDE NOTE: Laugh at all his jokes, even the ones that aren't funny. It's a philological thing. He'll think he needs you to feel good about himself. The sad life of a teenage boy.

Step 6

To prevent yourself from speaking, ask him a question that will take him a long time to answer.

2 main positives on this, you can admire his looks while he talks and it prevents you from saying anything not intelligent.

You officially know the basics.

So as long as you do those specific things, you have a chance with your crush. I say a chance because maybe he'll see through the illusion you created. Who knows, if you're lucky maybe he'll like the real you but I wouldn't bet my money on it.