100:00:00,430 --> 00:00:02,900but by 2008 we'd all had enough.

200:00:02,900 --> 00:00:04,890Well, most of us.

300:00:05,710 --> 00:00:08,260To barney stone.

400:00:08,260 --> 00:00:10,100-Look it's the ridler. -That's not the ridler.

500:00:10,100 --> 00:00:11,800That's gumby.

600:00:11,800 --> 00:00:13,190Can we tie you in a knot later.

700:00:13,190 --> 00:00:16,270Hey nba player sidelined by a knee injury.

800:00:16,920 --> 00:00:19,440all right,laugh all you want but

900:00:19,450 --> 00:00:22,040This is my lucky st. patty's day suit.

1000:00:22,460 --> 00:00:23,700I have dry cleaned many a

1100:00:23,710 --> 00:00:25,580Stain off this baby.

1200:00:25,680 --> 00:00:27,270You know why it's lucky

1300:00:27,270 --> 00:00:28,190Because it's green.

1400:00:28,200 --> 00:00:30,740The color of go as in let's.

1500:00:30,750 --> 00:00:32,900Barney we talked this

1600:00:32,910 --> 00:00:35,350Over and we're not doing st.

1700:00:35,360 --> 00:00:36,170Patrick's day this year.

1800:00:36,900 --> 00:00:38,300Come on.let's...

1900:00:39,260 --> 00:00:43,950Are you -- wow, okay.

2000:00:44,130 --> 00:00:45,760I think I got to lie down.

2100:00:45,760 --> 00:00:47,440Can we shoot pool on you?

2200:00:48,110 --> 00:00:49,700No, no!

2300:00:49,700 --> 00:00:50,990Unacceptable.

2400:00:50,990 --> 00:00:52,550That's so not raven.

2500:00:53,380 --> 00:00:54,780What are you going to do instead.

2600:00:54,780 --> 00:00:55,780We just got the keys to

2700:00:55,790 --> 00:00:56,660Our new apartment so we're

2800:00:56,680 --> 00:00:59,470Going to hang that painting have board game night.

2900:00:59,470 --> 00:01:00,600You're welcome to join us, if you want.

3000:01:00,930 --> 00:01:02,560Board game night?

3100:01:02,760 --> 00:01:05,000Board game night!

3200:01:05,300 --> 00:01:06,640Come on!

3300:01:06,640 --> 00:01:08,540Let's drink green beer.

3400:01:08,630 --> 00:01:10,230Let's do green jello shots

3500:01:10,310 --> 00:01:11,350Where is your st. patrick's

3600:01:11,350 --> 00:01:12,340Day spirits

3700:01:12,340 --> 00:01:13,200We're drinking green tea.

3800:01:13,330 --> 00:01:14,940With caffeine.

3900:01:15,240 --> 00:01:17,090sorry,we're grown ups now,

4000:01:17,090 --> 00:01:19,670We can't fly up to neverland with you anymore

4100:01:20,030 --> 00:01:22,510All right, fine,

4200:01:22,530 --> 00:01:24,870You know what,I'll celebrate st. patrick's

4300:01:24,870 --> 00:01:25,780Day by myself.

4400:01:25,780 --> 00:01:27,520I don't need you people.

4500:01:27,540 --> 00:01:29,440You make me physically ill!

4600:01:31,220 --> 00:01:32,540He did look a little green.

4700:01:37,760 --> 00:01:38,990Hello?

4800:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,030Hey. happy st. patty's day.

4900:01:41,500 --> 00:01:43,590How are you? I've been talking to you forever

5000:01:43,590 --> 00:01:45,590-Who is it? -it's ted's butt.

5100:01:47,740 --> 00:01:50,220Damn it!My phone keeps pocket dialing.

5200:01:50,220 --> 00:01:51,520That's like 8th times today.

5300:01:51,520 --> 00:01:52,820In fairness I did call

5400:01:52,820 --> 00:01:54,900Ted's butt about 2:00 this afternoon.

5500:01:54,900 --> 00:01:57,730Just long enough to call you back.

5600:02:00,430 --> 00:02:01,150Barney?

5700:02:01,150 --> 00:02:01,820Where are you.

5800:02:01,820 --> 00:02:04,770In a cab, heading downtown with our hot and

5900:02:04,770 --> 00:02:06,170Sexy dates for the evening.

6000:02:06,170 --> 00:02:08,850Yes, it happens that fast!

6100:02:09,440 --> 00:02:12,110You're coming with us.

6200:02:12,140 --> 00:02:13,500For the last time.

6300:02:13,510 --> 00:02:14,590All right,

6400:02:14,590 --> 00:02:15,480I didn't want to tell you this

6500:02:15,480 --> 00:02:16,360in front of marshall and Lilly

6600:02:16,360 --> 00:02:18,730They are old and married and it's too late for them anyway

6700:02:18,740 --> 00:02:21,010but ted, the world is

6800:02:21,020 --> 00:02:22,980Going to come to an end tonight.

6900:02:24,290 --> 00:02:25,450Yes, think about it.

7000:02:26,000 --> 00:02:28,590End of the world, Nostradamus£¬notre dame,

7100:02:28,600 --> 00:02:29,790Fighting irish.

7200:02:29,790 --> 00:02:31,950Irish, st. patrick's day.

7300:02:31,950 --> 00:02:32,990This is it, bro.

7400:02:32,990 --> 00:02:34,250bro

7500:02:34,250 --> 00:02:35,120Apocalypse now.

7600:02:36,110 --> 00:02:37,340bro?megandon

7700:02:38,350 --> 00:02:40,340You are young, you're single.

7800:02:40,340 --> 00:02:41,040You will have so much more

7900:02:41,040 --> 00:02:41,680Fun with me.

8000:02:41,680 --> 00:02:42,860Do you want to spend your

8100:02:42,870 --> 00:02:44,700Last night on earth playing

8200:02:44,990 --> 00:02:46,620Board games with marshall and lilly?

8300:02:49,720 --> 00:02:50,860My hands smell weird.

8400:02:50,860 --> 00:02:51,610Smell this.

8500:02:52,750 --> 00:02:54,820They do, that's new.

8600:02:55,310 --> 00:02:56,530I'll be there in five minutes.

8700:02:57,520 --> 00:03:00,240Yes all right!

8800:03:00,240 --> 00:03:00,980He's in.

8900:03:00,980 --> 00:03:02,180Ted is a great guy.

9000:03:05,620 --> 00:03:06,860You're going to love him.

9100:03:08,950 --> 00:03:12,170So on march 17 2008, I went

9200:03:12,180 --> 00:03:13,740To a big st. patrick's day party.

9300:03:14,240 --> 00:03:15,970And it's a good thing I did

9400:03:16,080 --> 00:03:17,200Because funny story,

9500:03:18,130 --> 00:03:20,240Your mother was there.

9600:03:36,990 --> 00:03:38,500Hi,have you med ted.

9700:03:38,500 --> 00:03:39,610Hi, I'm mary.

9800:03:39,610 --> 00:03:41,410Hi, happy st. patty's day.

9900:03:41,570 --> 00:03:42,770I haven't met ted either.

10000:03:42,770 --> 00:03:44,000-I'm stefanie. -Hi

10100:03:44,770 --> 00:03:47,860Dude, back off. I called this on stefanie.

10200:03:47,860 --> 00:03:50,200Okay, mary's hot .

10300:03:51,080 --> 00:03:51,870Well then I want mary.

10400:03:52,370 --> 00:03:53,450Fine.

10500:03:54,300 --> 00:03:57,070Oh, I see reverse psychology.

10600:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,280Then I'm sticking with

10700:03:58,280 --> 00:04:01,680-Stefanie dr. frid. -Ok

10800:04:01,680 --> 00:04:02,790Which one do you want more.

10900:04:02,790 --> 00:04:03,290Either one.

11000:04:03,290 --> 00:04:04,060I want them both.

11100:04:04,070 --> 00:04:04,880You're an idiot.

11200:04:05,800 --> 00:04:06,690It may be a moot point.

11300:04:06,690 --> 00:04:09,460It doesn't look like we're getting in.

11400:04:09,460 --> 00:04:10,260Look at this.

11500:04:10,260 --> 00:04:11,050You know why there's a line,

11600:04:11,050 --> 00:04:12,660it's because i ditched marshall and lilly

11700:04:12,660 --> 00:04:13,800And now the universe is

11800:04:13,800 --> 00:04:15,810Punishing us for it, that's why.

11900:04:22,040 --> 00:04:23,860What's it going to cost us

12000:04:23,860 --> 00:04:25,080To get in, $20?

12100:04:25,080 --> 00:04:26,580$40.

12200:04:26,900 --> 00:04:28,730Dude come on, you're making the we folk look bad.

12300:04:28,730 --> 00:04:31,030just give me your pot of gold.

12400:04:31,330 --> 00:04:32,190Is it just you two?

12500:04:32,190 --> 00:04:34,570Don't worry we're not gonna blow your race here.

12600:04:34,570 --> 00:04:35,790We happen to have two very hot girls with us.

12700:04:36,480 --> 00:04:37,510Mine is the hotter one.

12800:04:38,620 --> 00:04:39,950Sorry guys, if it was

12900:04:39,950 --> 00:04:40,890Just you two, you can go in

13000:04:40,890 --> 00:04:41,820Right now.

13100:04:41,820 --> 00:04:43,140We have nothing but girls in there.

13200:04:43,490 --> 00:04:45,190People will start thinking it's a lesbian bar

13300:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,360Would you excuse us for just a minute?

13400:04:52,040 --> 00:04:52,990Ted I'm going to be honest

13500:04:52,990 --> 00:04:54,750I was full of it with

13600:04:54,750 --> 00:04:55,740that Nostradamus thing

13700:04:55,740 --> 00:04:57,680but I'm starting to think there's

13800:04:57,680 --> 00:04:59,980Serious planetary crap going on here tonight.

13900:05:01,450 --> 00:05:02,820Never in the history of new

14000:05:02,820 --> 00:05:04,060York city nightclub has

14100:05:04,060 --> 00:05:06,310There been a shortage of dudes.

14200:05:06,310 --> 00:05:07,340Not even during the great

14300:05:07,340 --> 00:05:09,260Dude shortage of 1883.

14400:05:10,230 --> 00:05:11,200We've got to ditch these girls.

14500:05:12,200 --> 00:05:12,750You dragged them all

14600:05:12,750 --> 00:05:13,600The way down here.

14700:05:13,600 --> 00:05:15,330I don't see no ring on this finger.

14800:05:16,790 --> 00:05:17,460Hold on.

14900:05:18,440 --> 00:05:19,250Excuse me.

15000:05:19,250 --> 00:05:19,840Are the girls in there

15100:05:19,840 --> 00:05:21,160Hotter than our dates?

15200:05:22,380 --> 00:05:23,540I don't know if they're hotter

15300:05:23,540 --> 00:05:25,020But they're drunker.

15400:05:25,020 --> 00:05:25,770Rock and roll.

15500:05:30,190 --> 00:05:33,780Welcome to your new dream home my lady.

15600:05:34,930 --> 00:05:35,950All right, all right.

15700:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,050Put me down, robin thinks we're weird.

15800:05:38,050 --> 00:05:39,550No it's fine,

15900:05:39,550 --> 00:05:43,790it was only weird on the subway.

16000:05:43,790 --> 00:05:45,410I'm going to check the other rooms to see if

16100:05:45,410 --> 00:05:48,610The previous owners left us any free stuff.

16200:05:48,610 --> 00:05:49,950I'll hang our first piece of art,

16300:05:50,990 --> 00:05:52,530There's already a nail,

16400:05:52,530 --> 00:05:53,570hey lily, free nail!

16500:05:53,670 --> 00:05:55,260score!

16600:05:58,560 --> 00:05:59,780-How's that. -perfect.

16700:06:10,880 --> 00:06:12,800Now this is ridiculous

16800:06:12,800 --> 00:06:13,820Is it the nail?

16900:06:14,090 --> 00:06:16,500-Marshall -Is the wall cookt crooked or something?

17000:06:17,760 --> 00:06:19,460-Marshall -Is there a draft in here.

17100:06:19,460 --> 00:06:20,560Marshall,

17200:06:20,580 --> 00:06:21,340what?

17300:06:21,380 --> 00:06:22,740Your apartment is crooked.

17400:06:23,770 --> 00:06:24,480What do you mean?

17500:06:29,560 --> 00:06:30,380It was the kind of thing

17600:06:30,380 --> 00:06:33,370You didn't notice Until you noticed it.

17700:06:33,380 --> 00:06:35,170and once you noticed it, you couldn't not notice it.

17800:06:35,310 --> 00:06:36,410Lilly an marshall's new apartment

17900:06:36,410 --> 00:06:38,420Was crooked.

18000:06:41,450 --> 00:06:42,250Oh, no!

18100:06:42,860 --> 00:06:44,200No, no!

18200:06:44,200 --> 00:06:45,600Oh,no, no!no, no!

18300:06:46,240 --> 00:06:47,070Yes.

18400:06:47,070 --> 00:06:47,760Are you telling me that

18500:06:47,760 --> 00:06:48,750We just spend our entire

18600:06:48,750 --> 00:06:51,780Life saving on a crooked apartment?

18700:06:51,780 --> 00:06:53,590Oh my god

18800:06:53,590 --> 00:06:55,310Oh,she's gonna fret

18900:06:55,710 --> 00:06:56,290Look what I found in the

19000:06:56,290 --> 00:06:58,580Kids' room, free skateboard,

19100:06:58,580 --> 00:06:59,580Score one

19200:06:59,790 --> 00:07:01,260Free hungry, hungry hippo.

19300:07:01,440 --> 00:07:03,140Double score!

19400:07:03,140 --> 00:07:03,940I'm going to check the kitchen

19500:07:04,810 --> 00:07:05,780How can she not notice.

19600:07:05,780 --> 00:07:08,280It's like the last 20 minutes of titanic in here.

19700:07:08,910 --> 00:07:10,360We have keep this quiet,

19800:07:10,360 --> 00:07:13,500If lilly finds out her dream house crooked

19900:07:13,500 --> 00:07:14,260It will break her heart.

20000:07:15,900 --> 00:07:16,230Free salad Strainer.

20100:07:16,230 --> 00:07:19,100I love this place

20200:07:19,100 --> 00:07:20,640Just for tonight, okay?

20300:07:20,640 --> 00:07:21,640Ok

20400:07:22,730 --> 00:07:24,280It's going to be an uphill battle.

20500:07:25,770 --> 00:07:27,190I'm just saying we have to

20600:07:27,190 --> 00:07:28,790Think of the right angle.

20700:07:30,710 --> 00:07:31,450I have a third one but I'm

20800:07:31,450 --> 00:07:32,300Not going to say it.

20900:07:34,760 --> 00:07:36,090I think we've stumbled

21000:07:36,090 --> 00:07:38,930Into some sort of ethical Worm hole.

21100:07:38,930 --> 00:07:40,030-Green suit -yeah

21200:07:40,030 --> 00:07:40,990I ditched marshall and lilly

21300:07:40,990 --> 00:07:43,430And was rewarded with two beautiful girls.

21400:07:43,430 --> 00:07:44,420Suits made of green.

21500:07:44,430 --> 00:07:46,840We bailed on those two beautiful girls

21600:07:46,840 --> 00:07:47,910and now we're

21700:07:47,910 --> 00:07:49,910Being rewarded with a sea of Beautiful girls.

21800:07:49,910 --> 00:07:50,86038 long.

21900:07:52,510 --> 00:07:53,120Like the laws of the

22000:07:53,120 --> 00:07:54,810Universe are working in reverse.

22100:07:54,810 --> 00:07:55,890Can you put it on my tab.

22200:07:55,890 --> 00:07:56,780What's the last name.

22300:07:56,780 --> 00:07:57,730Guido.

22400:07:59,400 --> 00:08:01,420I'm going to try something to see if this works

22500:08:01,720 --> 00:08:03,570-hey -hey what kind of do you get?

22600:08:03,570 --> 00:08:05,700A bottle of dom perignon.Can you put it on my tab.

22700:08:05,780 --> 00:08:06,410What's your name.

22800:08:06,770 --> 00:08:09,110-Garido. -Dude

22900:08:09,110 --> 00:08:11,260you're right. make it two bottles

23000:08:12,670 --> 00:08:14,080Now we wait and see something good

23100:08:14,080 --> 00:08:15,180Oh,hello

23200:08:15,180 --> 00:08:16,540St. patrick's tradition

23300:08:16,540 --> 00:08:18,130If you're not wearing green,

23400:08:18,130 --> 00:08:19,410You have to get punished.

23500:08:19,430 --> 00:08:21,110well this is what i deserved

23600:08:21,210 --> 00:08:22,440I'm not wearing green either.

23700:08:23,340 --> 00:08:26,330This is deep teal the

23800:08:26,330 --> 00:08:27,640Lighting makes it.

23900:08:27,660 --> 00:08:28,740I'm Ted

24000:08:28,740 --> 00:08:31,280Asheley,with two Es

24100:08:31,280 --> 00:08:33,270please Cs at most.

24200:08:33,400 --> 00:08:36,810You guys can join me and friends.We have a bottle of Tequila

24300:08:36,810 --> 00:08:39,320and shockingly deep belly buttons.

24400:08:41,100 --> 00:08:41,980Okay, it's official, do

24500:08:41,980 --> 00:08:43,420Bad things, good things happen.

24600:08:45,660 --> 00:08:47,780Ted, listen, are you hearing that?

24700:08:47,780 --> 00:08:48,810That's the universe.

24800:08:48,810 --> 00:08:50,580The universe is talking to us.

24900:08:51,090 --> 00:08:53,270We don't have to build a baseball field, do we?

25000:08:53,560 --> 00:08:55,100No the universe is

25100:08:55,100 --> 00:08:58,290Telling us that we have a free pass tonight.

25200:08:58,290 --> 00:08:59,860The universe is saying that

25300:08:59,860 --> 00:09:01,400We don't have to live in

25400:09:01,400 --> 00:09:03,360Fear of the -- are you still there?

25500:09:03,360 --> 00:09:04,310Yeah, I'm still here.

25600:09:04,310 --> 00:09:07,190For the repercussions of our actions.

25700:09:07,830 --> 00:09:09,560There is no waiting for tomorrow

25800:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,630because do you know why ted?

25900:09:13,830 --> 00:09:16,490There is no tomorrow.

26000:09:17,600 --> 00:09:18,700No tomorrow, huh?

26100:09:19,250 --> 00:09:20,390By the way mr. garido,

26200:09:20,790 --> 00:09:22,060With your champagne you get

26300:09:22,060 --> 00:09:23,770A free complimentary caviar.

26400:09:24,470 --> 00:09:25,390Enjoy.

26500:09:28,220 --> 00:09:30,790Not tomorrow

26600:09:31,220 --> 00:09:32,790Not tomorrow

26700:09:33,220 --> 00:09:33,790Hey wonder what the

26800:09:33,790 --> 00:09:35,010Grown-ups are doing right now?

26900:09:40,730 --> 00:09:41,750I win again!

27000:09:42,510 --> 00:09:43,740Why do I keep winning?

27100:09:44,640 --> 00:09:45,940Maybe your hip spoe just

27200:09:45,940 --> 00:09:47,870Hungrier than ours.

27300:09:47,870 --> 00:09:50,730That's it.That's what is.It's not gravity

27400:09:50,730 --> 00:09:51,890that's for sure. I'll tell you that.

27500:09:54,350 --> 00:09:55,250What's that?

27600:10:00,550 --> 00:10:01,530What's going on here?

27700:10:04,360 --> 00:10:05,130Okay, lilly.

27800:10:06,520 --> 00:10:07,220While you were in the other

27900:10:07,220 --> 00:10:09,790Room, robin and I

28000:10:09,790 --> 00:10:12,170We discovered something about this apartment

28100:10:12,170 --> 00:10:12,860It's not a big deal.

28200:10:13,160 --> 00:10:14,600It's not like a disaster,

28300:10:15,120 --> 00:10:16,180It's just something that

28400:10:16,180 --> 00:10:18,030We're going to have to learn to live with.

28500:10:22,260 --> 00:10:24,460Robin and I saw a ghost.

28600:10:25,130 --> 00:10:26,000What?

28700:10:26,870 --> 00:10:27,980He's kidding, right?

28800:10:28,450 --> 00:10:30,450No, we really saw a ghost.

28900:10:31,190 --> 00:10:32,140What did it look like?

29000:10:33,290 --> 00:10:36,320A sheet with two holes

29100:10:37,370 --> 00:10:39,300He was a Confederate general

29200:10:39,300 --> 00:10:40,410Who was wounded at the battle of Antietam

29300:10:40,410 --> 00:10:42,150and died at the army

29400:10:42,150 --> 00:10:45,830Hospital which once stood on this very spot

29500:10:46,380 --> 00:10:47,120And now he wanders these halls

29600:10:47,120 --> 00:10:51,520vowing revenge against the union he once failed in

29700:10:52,430 --> 00:10:54,210But he seems nice. good guy.

29800:10:55,850 --> 00:10:57,130You see ghosts everywhere.

29900:10:57,130 --> 00:10:59,040You see ghosts at starbucks.

30000:11:00,020 --> 00:11:01,760That kenny g holiday cd

30100:11:01,760 --> 00:11:03,670Just flew off the shelf.

30200:11:03,670 --> 00:11:04,710Last time that happened.

30300:11:06,050 --> 00:11:07,940Robin you're a skeptic so if

30400:11:07,940 --> 00:11:10,840You say you saw a ghost,.

30500:11:12,730 --> 00:11:13,240It passed right

30600:11:13,240 --> 00:11:14,870Through me and suddenly i

30700:11:14,870 --> 00:11:16,260Felt cold.

30800:11:16,260 --> 00:11:17,820So very coal. cold.

30900:11:21,780 --> 00:11:24,060You know ashley, you

31000:11:24,060 --> 00:11:24,900Probably just want to get up

31100:11:24,900 --> 00:11:26,230And walk away but I just

31200:11:26,230 --> 00:11:27,090Have to test out this theory

31300:11:27,090 --> 00:11:28,120I've been working on.

31400:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,220Tonight, I'm not looking for

31500:11:31,220 --> 00:11:32,070A relationship.

31600:11:32,070 --> 00:11:33,940I really just want to hook

31700:11:33,940 --> 00:11:34,750Up with you, leave before

31800:11:34,750 --> 00:11:36,200Breakfast and never see you again.

31900:11:39,100 --> 00:11:40,010I'm in.

32000:11:40,580 --> 00:11:41,830Unbelievable.

32100:11:44,140 --> 00:11:45,830Hot damn, that's a deep naval!

32200:11:46,740 --> 00:11:47,980No tomorrow ted!

32300:11:47,980 --> 00:11:49,310No tomorrow barney.

32400:11:50,660 --> 00:11:51,870No tomorrow, huh?

32500:11:52,680 --> 00:11:54,030I like that idea.

32600:11:54,900 --> 00:11:56,140Because if there is a tomorrow,

32700:11:56,140 --> 00:11:58,030I'm going to be in

32800:11:58,030 --> 00:11:59,710A lot of trouble.

32900:12:00,530 --> 00:12:01,340Why is that?

33000:12:01,840 --> 00:12:02,880I'm married.

33100:12:06,500 --> 00:12:07,730Tell me you're messing

33200:12:07,730 --> 00:12:08,500With me guys.

33300:12:08,500 --> 00:12:09,700You didn't actually see a ghost

33400:12:09,700 --> 00:12:12,120it's not a big deal baby.

33500:12:12,120 --> 00:12:13,150He seemed friendly.

33600:12:13,700 --> 00:12:15,270You said he's a Confederate general,

33700:12:15,370 --> 00:12:16,460they're the bad guys.

33800:12:16,460 --> 00:12:18,200And he's probably racist!

33900:12:19,170 --> 00:12:20,390He seems polite.

34000:12:20,390 --> 00:12:22,720He has courtly southern manners.

34100:12:23,570 --> 00:12:25,170How can we bring our kids here.

34200:12:25,170 --> 00:12:29,280I don't want a confederate general ghost teach them racism!

34300:12:29,290 --> 00:12:32,450He loves people of all colors and creeds.

34400:12:32,450 --> 00:12:34,520He was fighting for state rights.That's all.

34500:12:34,960 --> 00:12:35,570You have said he was wearing a sheet,

34600:12:35,570 --> 00:12:37,720what do you think that means?

34700:12:37,720 --> 00:12:39,410The apartment is crooked!

34800:12:40,950 --> 00:12:41,760What?

34900:12:44,110 --> 00:12:44,670Robin and i

35000:12:45,170 --> 00:12:46,480Didn't see a ghost.

35100:12:49,830 --> 00:12:51,650The floor is crooked, isn't it?

35200:12:52,660 --> 00:12:53,780Yeah.

35300:12:54,900 --> 00:12:55,690We spent our entire

35400:12:55,690 --> 00:12:58,180Life savings on this particular.

35500:12:58,180 --> 00:13:00,640The next 30 mortgage paying

35600:13:00,640 --> 00:13:02,020Years of our lives will be

35700:13:02,020 --> 00:13:05,100Spent on a floor an it's crooked!

35800:13:12,390 --> 00:13:14,430Thanks a lot, robin.

35900:13:16,410 --> 00:13:17,570How is racist

36000:13:17,570 --> 00:13:19,570Ghost bear than crooked?

36100:13:21,200 --> 00:13:22,940Someone tell me how that's better.

36200:13:25,930 --> 00:13:27,230Oh, I'm sorry.

36300:13:27,230 --> 00:13:28,960That's okay.

36400:13:28,960 --> 00:13:32,630So I'm having second thoughts about that theory.

36500:13:32,630 --> 00:13:34,300I'm telling you if you want to know how old a woman

36600:13:34,300 --> 00:13:35,530Is check her elbows.

36700:13:35,530 --> 00:13:36,700Not that theory.

36800:13:36,700 --> 00:13:38,330You have to be More specific,ted

36900:13:38,330 --> 00:13:40,330Because I have so many theories.

37000:13:40,330 --> 00:13:41,760The whole do bad,good things happen.

37100:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,000Asheley is married.

37200:13:44,000 --> 00:13:44,830So?

37300:13:44,830 --> 00:13:46,200What do you mean so?

37400:13:46,200 --> 00:13:48,530Open your brain tank,

37500:13:48,530 --> 00:13:52,900Because here come fromPremium 91 octane knowledge.

37600:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,300There's three rules of cheating.

37700:13:54,400 --> 00:13:56,300It's not cheating if you're not the one whose married.

37800:13:56,300 --> 00:13:59,830It's not cheating if her name has two adjacent vowels

37900:13:59,840 --> 00:14:02,080And it's not cheating if she's in a different area code.

38000:14:02,080 --> 00:14:03,570You're fine on all three counts.

38100:14:03,940 --> 00:14:05,450How do you know she's from a different area code.

38200:14:05,450 --> 00:14:07,510She's 516

38300:14:07,940 --> 00:14:10,730She may dress like 718,she might act like 212

38400:14:10,830 --> 00:14:13,430But trust me,she is 516

38500:14:13,520 --> 00:14:14,200Oh and her husband

38600:14:14,200 --> 00:14:17,490Letting her out alone on st.Patty's day

38700:14:17,590 --> 00:14:20,030if that guy is not 973, I'm 307.

38800:14:21,730 --> 00:14:22,730Wyoming.

38900:14:27,500 --> 00:14:29,220Maybe we can nail down all our furniture.

39000:14:29,360 --> 00:14:32,380We won't be able to get a pinball machine.

39100:14:32,410 --> 00:14:35,290Unless we put a book under two of the legs or something.

39200:14:35,660 --> 00:14:37,730But if we wanna read those books.this is a nightmare.

39300:14:38,630 --> 00:14:40,210Can't raise our kids here.

39400:14:40,280 --> 00:14:41,620They will grow up slanted.

39500:14:41,620 --> 00:14:43,160If we have a daughter,

39600:14:43,160 --> 00:14:45,410we have to call her ilene.

39700:14:46,500 --> 00:14:48,010I don't think we can live here marshall.

39800:14:49,850 --> 00:14:50,710I don't know what we're gonna to do.

39900:14:51,630 --> 00:14:52,730Marshall?

40000:14:54,020 --> 00:14:55,020Open the door.

40100:15:05,820 --> 00:15:06,920If I make to it the door

40200:15:06,920 --> 00:15:08,320That's five points.

40300:15:09,920 --> 00:15:11,310Woo-hoo!

40400:15:12,520 --> 00:15:13,680Yeah!

40500:15:14,980 --> 00:15:16,390Five points.

40600:15:16,390 --> 00:15:18,59010 bucks says I can do it backwards.

40700:15:18,590 --> 00:15:20,100So lilly and marshall

40800:15:20,100 --> 00:15:23,120Decided to make the best of A bad situation

40900:15:23,120 --> 00:15:27,290and that's also how the apartment roller luge was invented.

41000:15:27,290 --> 00:15:29,550Very careful,very,oh, yeah!

41100:15:30,450 --> 00:15:31,620So she's married.

41200:15:31,620 --> 00:15:32,450Not like she has kid.

41300:15:32,710 --> 00:15:34,430How do you know?

41400:15:34,450 --> 00:15:36,690Wrist!It's like you don't even listen to me.

41500:15:39,190 --> 00:15:40,130Oh, hey.

41600:15:40,130 --> 00:15:40,820Hey.

41700:15:40,820 --> 00:15:41,450Where did you go.

41800:15:42,270 --> 00:15:43,200Well, I just.

41900:15:43,400 --> 00:15:43,950Was it something I said.

42000:15:43,950 --> 00:15:45,850No,no,no,it's just...

42100:15:45,850 --> 00:15:47,270Well, you're married and

42200:15:47,270 --> 00:15:49,990We've been drinking and i was worried we might...

42300:15:50,690 --> 00:15:53,110This is a very bad idea.

42400:15:55,510 --> 00:15:56,810We have a problem

42500:15:56,810 --> 00:15:58,530Hey, hey, hey.

42600:16:00,450 --> 00:16:02,280Is this your husband.

42700:16:02,280 --> 00:16:04,100I've never seen him in my life

42800:16:04,480 --> 00:16:06,200Ok,what's our problem

42900:16:06,800 --> 00:16:07,790Rick,Rick garido

43000:16:07,790 --> 00:16:09,230According to the bar tenor

43100:16:09,230 --> 00:16:10,480I'm the guy who has been

43200:16:10,480 --> 00:16:12,290Buying you shall pain all night

43300:16:12,590 --> 00:16:15,030Ok,there's a very simple explanation

43400:16:16,730 --> 00:16:18,090The next thing I know is the police show up,

43500:16:18,090 --> 00:16:19,030They arrest the other guy

43600:16:19,030 --> 00:16:21,370and I'm drinking for free the rest of the night

43700:16:21,700 --> 00:16:22,790It was awesome

43800:16:24,790 --> 00:16:25,880Awesome?

43900:16:26,640 --> 00:16:27,160Yeah

44000:16:27,160 --> 00:16:30,480You don't see anything wrong with that story

44100:16:30,480 --> 00:16:33,420Well I lost my phone in the club somewhere

44200:16:33,490 --> 00:16:34,490What the hell is wrong with you,dude?

44300:16:36,180 --> 00:16:37,270I lose things

44400:16:37,270 --> 00:16:39,690You kissed a married woman ted

44500:16:39,690 --> 00:16:42,180You committed credit card fraud

44600:16:42,180 --> 00:16:43,600You kissed a married woman

44700:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,290Do you know how offensive that is to me?

44800:16:46,690 --> 00:16:47,870You're turning into barney

44900:16:47,880 --> 00:16:49,190We don't need another barney

45000:16:52,090 --> 00:16:54,150It's st. patty's day!

45100:16:54,630 --> 00:16:56,350It wasn't as bad as it sounds

45200:16:56,350 --> 00:16:57,410It wasn't as bad as it sounds?

45300:16:57,930 --> 00:16:58,920Huh? okay.

45400:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,290I want you to hear exactly

45500:17:00,290 --> 00:17:02,450How it sounds ted

45600:17:03,670 --> 00:17:04,500First skipped message

45700:17:04,500 --> 00:17:06,240I don't see no ring on this finger

45800:17:06,240 --> 00:17:07,370And then last night

45900:17:07,370 --> 00:17:08,760Started coming back to me

46000:17:09,490 --> 00:17:10,080The real version

46100:17:10,580 --> 00:17:13,330Are the girls this there hotter than our dates?

46200:17:13,330 --> 00:17:15,000I don't know if they're hotter,

46300:17:15,000 --> 00:17:17,540but they're drunker.

46400:17:17,540 --> 00:17:18,740Rock and roll!

46500:17:22,630 --> 00:17:24,340-How many messages did I... -17

46600:17:25,840 --> 00:17:27,380Kids it's sometimes

46700:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,850Possible you're doing just fine in life

46800:17:30,150 --> 00:17:31,280Next message

46900:17:31,490 --> 00:17:32,580Can you put it on my tab?

47000:17:33,040 --> 00:17:34,060Sir, what's the last name?

47100:17:34,710 --> 00:17:35,390Garido.

47200:17:36,290 --> 00:17:39,000And then someone opens your eyes a bit

47300:17:39,570 --> 00:17:41,200And then you realize

47400:17:41,200 --> 00:17:41,940Next message

47500:17:41,940 --> 00:17:42,840I really want to hook up with you

47600:17:42,840 --> 00:17:44,000Leave before breakfast an

47700:17:44,990 --> 00:17:46,540Never see you again

47800:17:47,480 --> 00:17:48,500Your whole world is off balance

47900:17:48,990 --> 00:17:49,970Next message

48000:17:50,730 --> 00:17:52,530out of whack

48100:17:52,630 --> 00:17:56,070Ok,look,bro,there's a very simple explanation

48200:17:56,080 --> 00:17:57,010Crooked

48300:18:03,110 --> 00:18:04,990That was hard to listen to

48400:18:06,310 --> 00:18:07,230No one sounds good in answerign machine

48500:18:11,280 --> 00:18:12,350Thanks for doing that

48600:18:15,640 --> 00:18:16,640You yelled at me

48700:18:17,340 --> 00:18:18,370You got very firm with me

48800:18:19,060 --> 00:18:19,820Very confident

48900:18:20,440 --> 00:18:21,400It was cool

49000:18:21,830 --> 00:18:22,580Thanks

49100:18:22,580 --> 00:18:24,630You're very sexy when you yell marshall

49200:18:24,650 --> 00:18:26,340Shut up

49300:18:26,340 --> 00:18:27,890Crazy muscles in your neck

49400:18:28,550 --> 00:18:30,630You're like the kentucky derby,winning streaks

49500:18:30,630 --> 00:18:31,830You're ruining our last moment

49600:18:31,830 --> 00:18:34,180At one point I thought we were going to kiss

49700:18:34,470 --> 00:18:35,360Ted seriously

49800:18:36,090 --> 00:18:38,230I'm married

49900:18:40,530 --> 00:18:41,830A slanted floor

50000:18:41,830 --> 00:18:42,890Architecturally speaking

50100:18:42,890 --> 00:18:43,790Fixing that will be

50200:18:43,790 --> 00:18:44,690Very very

50300:18:44,690 --> 00:18:46,390Very expensive

50400:18:46,390 --> 00:18:49,990And it's going to take some time too

50500:18:49,990 --> 00:18:51,160So, looks like you're stuck with us for a

50600:18:51,160 --> 00:18:51,960Little while longer if

50700:18:51,960 --> 00:18:52,990That's okay

50800:18:52,990 --> 00:18:53,830Are you kidding?

50900:18:53,830 --> 00:18:54,860I love it

51000:18:54,860 --> 00:18:57,510I don't know what's going to happen without you guys around

51100:18:57,540 --> 00:18:59,130Where are you going

51200:18:59,760 --> 00:19:01,900I'm going to get my stupid phone

51300:19:02,560 --> 00:19:05,240So that was st. patrick's day 2008

51400:19:05,240 --> 00:19:08,090I find out years later that your mom was at that party

51500:19:08,390 --> 00:19:09,730I just didn't meet her

51600:19:10,420 --> 00:19:11,840It's a good thing I didn't

51700:19:11,940 --> 00:19:13,250Because if I had, I don't

51800:19:13,250 --> 00:19:15,070Think she would have liked me

51900:19:15,320 --> 00:19:17,080In fact I don't think I like me

52000:19:17,340 --> 00:19:18,590But that's okay

52100:19:18,670 --> 00:19:21,020Tomorrow had arrived

52200:19:56,620 --> 00:19:59,690You see I didn't know it yet,

52300:19:59,690 --> 00:20:01,890But my luck was about to change

52400:20:24,990 --> 00:20:26,990I'm awesome!

000:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00

<font color="#ffff00" size=14>www.tvsubtitles.net</font>