Guidelines on Delivering & Receiving Feedback

Effectively

The Value of Feedback

Giving feedback in a constructive way will have a positive effect on improving performance.

Feedback gives someone information about aspects of their behaviour or performance which affect others. Feedback helps individuals to be aware of how their behaviour is perceived by others, and it is therefore a way of helping a person consider whether to change their behaviour in some way.

It is useful to use other’s reactions to our own behaviour as a mirror for observing the

consequences of our behaviour; feedback is therefore a useful tool in making us more aware of

what we do and how we do it. It can help us to learn whether or not our behaviour is having the

desired effect i.e. is the IMPACT the same as the INTENT?

However, you cannot make someone change by giving them feedback- they have to want to change. You can encourage this by:

helping them to understand the impact that their current behaviour or level of performance is likely to have on their future in the business

encouraging them and reassuring them that they have the potential to change and develop

making them aware of what they stand to gain if they take steps to improve their performance or behaviour

Guidance for Delivering Feedback Effectively

Giving feedback lets someone know the impact their behaviour had on you. This feedback should describe how you feel about their behaviour (i.e. what they have done) and not the person themselves e.g.:

“I felt upset when you . . . ”

“I was disappointed when you . . .”

“I felt you were really adding value when you.....”

By describing your feelings, you signal that you are more interested in resolving the problem than blaming the person. It also helps you avoid using criticism and advice - both tend to provoke a negative response. It should be individual and descriptive rather than judgmental. You can only give valid feedback on the effect of someone's behaviour on you, not on other people, nor on their intention.

All feedback should be given with the intent to assist an individual in developing.

When you give feedback, refer to a small number of specific behaviours or incidents which have happened recently to really bring it to life. If it is development feedback, direct it at behaviour that can be changed. Be specific – give examples. Generalisations are not helpful, for example:

"you made three very constructive points in that meeting and they were X,Y,Z"

rather than "you were good in that meeting"

Give a balance of both positive feedback and developmental feedback. People learn best from knowing both what they do well now and what they could consider doing differently.

To be most useful feedback should be timely. Ideally this is immediately or as close as possible in time to the behaviour to which it refers. So for example:

"I didn't like what you said to me" or "I like the way you handled that problem"

will be more useful now rather than in six months time. However, there may be times when immediate feedback would not be the most timely, such as directly after a bad experience. The needs of the recipient should always be considered.

Structure your feedback to include: The context The behaviour you saw Its impact on you (and others if you have collected this) An alternative behaviour or action that would have a more positive impact (if it’s

development feedback)

Own your feedback - be sincere and don't say something if you don't really mean it

It should be checked for understanding. If someone is to consider changing their behaviour it is important that they have accurately understood the message you are giving them. It is helpful in that case to check "did I explain that clearly?" or "can you tell me your understanding of what I just said?" Check to be sure that they have heard the full

message and not zoned in on the developmental feedback only and perceived this as negative.

Don’t forget that the way that your message comes across will be: 7% words (content) 13-18% voice tone 75-80% body language

so think about the impact you want to have in delivering the feedback and manage your voice tone and body language accordingly.

Take time to prepare yourself to deliver the feedback.

Prepare the person for receiving the feedback. Ideally giving and receiving feedback will be part of the way that you work together. If not set the context for delivering the feedback – what is the end goal of delivering the feedback? – and set up a specific meeting to do this.

Consider:

Ways your feedback might land with the other person What reactions you are likely to get Any potential chain of events after it lands.

This will help you to position your feedback so that it is most valuable and constructive.

Receiving Feedback

Giving feedback to someone about their ability or behaviour is likely to make them feel vulnerable. Vulnerability often causes the value of the feedback to be lost because people deny, reject or deflect it.

This is true with both positive and developmental feedback.

Developmental feedback often feels like criticism, even if presented as “advice” or an opportunity for development.

Positive feedback often makes people uncomfortable because of embarrassment or modesty.

Either way, it is important to continue to own your feedback by:

- remaining clear about the point you are making

- giving real and specific examples to illustrate your feedback

There are certain things to avoid:

1. being overly supportive so that the value of your feedback diminishes

2. backing down from your point of view or withdrawing it

- the receiver becomes confused or never gets the feedback

3. hammering the point home - let responsibility for accepting the point lie with the receiver

It may be helpful to really set the scene for receiving feedback by going through the following

guidelines for receiving feedback:

Listen - do not give reasons, excuses or defend your behaviour: try to understand the other person's point of view.

Ask for clarification - remember, feedback should be on the impact of your behaviour not on your intention.

Ask for examples

Take time to absorb and reflect on the feedback and then make your decision: To change your behaviour? To remain the same? What are the consequences of both?

Remember: a person’s perception represents their reality. We should, therefore, demonstrate our

willingness to respond positively and address the issue which concerns them.

A format for giving feedback:

When you (do this), I feel (this way), because (of such and such). What I would like you to consider is (doing X) because I think it will accomplish (Y). What do you think?

Example:

"When you are late for meetings, I get angry, because I think it is wasting the time of all the other team members and we are never able to get through our agenda items.

I would like you to consider some way of planning your schedule that lets you get to meetings on time. That way we can be more productive at the meetings and we can all keep to our tight schedules.

What do you think about that?”

The Format:

Sequence Explanation

1. "When you ..." Start with a "When you ..." statement describing the behaviour without judgement, exaggeration, labelling, attribution, or motives. Just state the facts as specifically as possible.

2. "I feel ..." Tell how their behaviour affects you. If you need more than a word or two to describe the feeling its probably just some variation of joy, sorrow, anger or fear.

3. "Because I ... " Now say why you are affected that way. Describe the connection between the facts you observed and the feelings they provoked in you.

4. Pause for discussion Let the other person respond.

5. "I would like ... " Describe the change you want the other person to consider ...

6. "Because ... " ... and why you think the change will alleviate the problem.

7. "What do you think?" Listen to the other person's response. Be prepared to discuss options and compromise on a solution.

Useful phrases for you to work with are:

I am concerned about ... I feel I need to let you know ... I want us to discuss ...

Don't: Confuse giving feedback with 'getting it off your chest'

Do: Be specific and clear about the purpose of the feedback