Divorce in CanadaSociological Trends and Legal Changes

Facebook and Divorce

Nearly 30% of new couples are meeting online. (TIME Magazine, 2010)

Facebook cited in 33% of divorce petitions (applications). (UK study, 2011)

What is it about social media/online dating that creates such positive and negative circumstances for couples?

Consider ...

Why you think social media poses such a threat to married couples, specifically those having marital problems?

Do you think this “online” problem will persist for married couples in the future? Why?

When marriage does not meet the expectations of 1 or both partners.

Lack of marital satisfaction

Rates fluctuate as a result of Social and Moral values

Today: controlled by religion and government

Divorce

Ancient Romans – purely family concern, rather than state governed.◦ Very attainable, happened frequently

Early Christians (11th-12th cent)◦ First consideration from a religious standpoint.

Catholic Church – Marriage as a Sacrament◦ Marriage as a sacred rite, spiritual importance. ◦ Divorce was the breaking of something sacred.

History of Divorce

Functionalist perspective (stability created by roles and division of labour)

Traditional (economic, childrearing basis)

Divorce meant suing for “matrimonial offence” (adultery and cruelty)

Early 20th Century

Romance as the basis for marriage.

Assessment of satisfaction = how happy are you?

Divorce treated as “marriage breakdown”

Divorce law reflects love and companionate purposes of marriage.

Mid 20th Century

Divorce is increasingly common

Divorce law decreases the time required to get a divorce.

Late 20th Century

Divorce Law

1867 •Constitution Act•Marriage and Divorce federally governed• 1925 – Adultery grounds for divorce (for women)

1968 • Divorce Act -“Marriage Breakdown” after 3 years of separation

•Sharp increase in divorce rates

1986 •Divorce Act – 1 year of separation before divorce.•“No Fault” divorce•Sharp increase in divorce rate.

Phases of Divorce Awareness, Separation, Reorganization

One person requests/initiates

Recognition of ongoing problems

Denial until confronted by request for divorce

Begin shifting energy to outside roles

Awareness

Plan the break up

Settle child custody and finances

Notify friends, family & coworkers

2 new households

Separation

Establish 2 separate lives (social, financial)

Form new social life as a single person

Negotiate new parental roles

Reorganization

In 1985 what changes were made to the Divorce Act?

What is the “single ground” for divorce? What three conditions can give reason for divorce?

Define separation. Outline the conditions surrounding the process of separation.

Adultery and cruelty are still considered to be “matrimonial offences”. Outline how these offences can and cannot be used as grounds for divorce.

What kind of evidence is needed to prove the presence of adultery or cruelty? Why are these “offences” treated differently?

Legal Matters: Divorce (p. 251)

What can these artworks tell us about divorce as a legal, emotional and physical process?

Two Sides of DivorceThe Legal and the Real

Divorce doesn’t end on paper or in court

After legal divorce there are emotional and practical issues to cover

Consequences are complex, and so are they emotions

New individual developmental tasks

Keep in Mind

Arrangements for property, possessions, children and spousal support

Legal Divorce – The Basics

Legal action taken to keep the peace, protect yourself, children and property.

Manage Conflict

Only when disagreements cannot be resolved. Law imposes a decision on the situation.

Legal Intervention

If kids are involved, Judge will consider both partners’ requests. Reasonable? Supported?

Children

Don’t expect too much from legal divorce

Finalization won’t solve all problems

Setting themselves up for frustration or disappointment

Caution!

The reality and feelings that hit post-divorce

Dealing with:◦ Feelings ◦ Finances◦ Friends and Family

“Real” or Practical Divorce

Ending one life, beginning another

Breaking old patterns

New Balance

The Challenge?

Breaking emotional bonds

Habits and dependencies that connect you to your spouse.

Letting Go: anger, guilt, blame, fear, resentment, tension.

Achieve neutral view of ex-spouse

Self-confidence and new openness.

Emotional

Mind and body cannot be separated!

Internalized stress and feelings cause physical symptoms

Tension, stress, anxiety lead to illness

Rates of suicide, accident victims & physical illness

Physical

Listen to your body

Indicator of mental and emotional heath

Take Extra Care

“taking care of business”, making ends meet.

Safety, security, stability for you & children

Financial realities for men and women

Practical

Economic Realities

Men Women

Greater earning potential

More likely to remarry

Higher standard or living

Lower earning potential

Less likely to remarry

More likely to have custody

Very low standard of living

10% of those divorced feel that their life is better.

20% feel that quality of life is significantly worse.

10 Years later?

A legal contract

Summarizes obligations to one another

Finances, property, children

Can be made before of after marriage

Promises to each other.

Marriage Contracts