Bullying and Cyber bullying: What Parents Should Know, Act, and Advocate

Bullying: WHAT? "A person is bullied when he or she is exposed, repeatedly and over time, to negative actions on the part of one or more other persons, and he or she has difficulty defending himself or herself. (www.olweus.org)

Your child might be...

Complex Dynamics of a School Bullying Culture(Parsons, 2005) some students bully other students; some of these student bullies are themselves bullied by other student bullies; some of these student bullies bully teacherssome teachers bully students; some teacher bullies bully other teachers; some teacher bullies bully parents

Complex Dynamics of a School Bullying Culture (Parsons, 2005) some office staff bully teachers, students and parents some principals bully teachers, office staff, students and parents some parents bully teachers, office staff, principals, other parents and their own children.

Why do people bully? : REAP-OR rewards (satisfaction on material and psychological aspects)E envy (sign of insecurity low self-esteem )A attention P power O others are doing it

Types of Bullying Physical Verbal Social Psychological (emotional and mental)

Cyber bullying A.K.A.on line bullying cyber harassment electronic bullyinginternet bullyingonline aggressiononline social cruelty

Cyber bullying Is when a child, pre-teen, or teen, is repeatedly tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise targeted by another child, pre-teen, or teen using the internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile phones (Stopcyberbully.org.)

What cyberbullies do (Source: iSafe)

A threatening e-mailNasty instant messaging sessionRepeated notes sent to the cell phoneA website set up to mock othersBorrowing someones screen name and pretending to be them while posting a message.Forwarding supposedly private messages, pictures, or video to others.

9/10/2011

Cyber bullying FactsMost common among middle school students (high school students).Cyber bullying typically starts at about 9 years of age and usually ends after 14 years of age; after 14, it becomes cyber or sexual harassment due to nature of acts and age of actors (Aftab, 2008)20% of the population have been cyberbullied (Hinduja & Patchin, 2010).60 % of students had been cyberbullied and were victims of cyberbullying (Heimowitz, 2007).

Cyber bullying FactsSurveyed 400 Freshman students, 12.5% of them experienced/experiencing cyber bullying (Janairo, 2010)Adolescent girls (26%) are more likely to have experienced cyberbullying than boys (16%) (Hinduja & Patchin, 2010)Girls are more likely to spread rumors.Boys are more likely to post hurtful pictures or videos (Adams, 2010).

Sticks and stones may break my bones... but words can even more painful Tirazona words can hurt your soul S. Wessler

Kinds of Cyberbullying(Willard, 2007) Flaming - Online fights using electronic messages with angry and vulgar language.Harassment - Repeatedly sending offensive, rude, and insulting messagesCyber stalking - Repeatedly sending messages that include threats of harm or are highly intimidating. Denigration - Sending or posting cruel gossip or rumors about a person to damage his or her reputation or friendships.

Kinds of Cyberbullying(Willard, 2007) Outing and Trickery - Tricking someone into revealing secrets or embarrassing information which is then shared onlineExclusion - Intentionally excluding someone from an online group, like a buddy list Impersonation - Pretending to be someone else and sending or posting material online that makes that person look bad, gets that person in trouble or danger, or damages that persons reputation or friendships

Signs of cyberbullying(Borba, 2010) Hesitant to be online; nervous when an Instant Message, text message or Email appearsVisibly upset after using the computer or cell phone or suddenly avoids it Hides or clears the computer screen or closes cell phone when an adult enter

Signs of cyberbullying(Borba, 2010) Trouble sleeping, loss of appetite, excessively moody or crying, seems depressedSuspicious phone calls, e-mails and packages arrives at his/her homeSpends unusually and longer hours online in a more tense pensive tone

9/10/2011

Signs of cyberbullying(Borba, 2010) Withdraws from friendsFalls behind in schoolwork or wants to avoid schoolSuddenly sullen, evasive withdrawn, marked change in personality or behaviorPossible drop in academic performance

Just as steel can be used to build hospitals and machine guns, or nuclear power can either energize a city or destroy it, modern information networks and technologies their support can be harnessed for good or ill.- Hillary Clinton, 2010

Effects of Cyber bullying (Miller, 2008)

Roles and Responsibilities: What can you do as parents? P.E.P.I.A.Presence Educate/empower Policy Inform Advocate

Guiding your childrenDo not respondDo not retaliate Save the evidence Talk to trusted adultBlock the bully Be civil Do not be a bullyBe a friend, not a bystander

Talk to your kids. Ask them questions about school, classmates, friends, interests and their personal life. Never model bad behavior to your children. Dont swear, loose your temper or gossip in front of them.Also dont use aggressive, bullying behavior in their presence. Present a positive view of the world to your children.Let them go into the world with optimism at their core, instead of brokenness at their core.

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