1. Theory and Techniques

2. OverviewNature of ConflictConflict StylesModel for Conflict ResolutionPractical Application 3. Nature of Conflict Can be productive Can lead to increased understanding when a constructivediscussion takes place Can lead to increased group cohesion when the team learns toproblem solve together Can lead to improved self-knowledge and personal development Can be destructive Conflicting goals turn into personal dislike Teamwork breaks down Talent is wasted as people disengage from their work Vicious downward spiral of negativity and recrimination 4. Approaches to ConflictTry to change the other person Usually not very successfulTry to alter the conflict conditions Add resources, change the playersChange your own behavior Hard to do but worth the effort 5. Ability to Work with Each Other All staff members are valuable Be willing to do the little things Be flexible at work Work as a team at all times Must be able to admit a mistake and learn from it Respect all staff Know how to say hello/good morning Realize you set the tone and mood for the day 6. Avoiding Bad Habits Complaining Easy and common- an initial reflex whenthings dont go our way Resentment holding on to bitterness can really poisonthe atmosphere. Learn how to forgive and let go. Worrying Channel your fears into positive energy; Takeproactive steps and gain control over your life. Polarization - Us vs. Them mentality 7. Developing Good Habits Taking care of yourself- ie; meditation, exercise Trust- Having in belief in what you and others do. Attitude- Its all about how you present yourself. Have agood attitude. Attitude is a reflection of yourself. Having compassion Show a sense of humor 8. Dont let how you feel control you Let you control how you feel! 9. Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode InstrumentDeveloped in 1974 by Kenneth W. Thomas and Ralph H. Kilmann 10. Five Conflict Styles Competing Accommodating Avoiding Compromising Collaborating 11. Im Right and Youre Wrong 12. CompetingCharacteristicsWhen Appropriate to use Win/lose approach Quick, decisive action required Principled, positional Vital issues are at stake Aggressive and power-oriented Unpopular path must be takenNegative Consequences People stop questioning status quo One viewpoint begins to dominate the conversations Others have limited buy-in 13. Live and Let Live 14. AccommodatingCharacteristics When Appropriate to use Passive approach You know youre wrong Yields position & principle Must avoid disruption Live and Let Live Minimal interest in the issueNegative Consequences As a shortcut through the process, important insights are withheld Potential for one persons needs to be frustrated May lead to loss of respect and recognition 15. Whatever 16. AvoidingCharacteristicsWhen Appropriate to use Avoiding the issue More information is needed Whatever Resolution is impossible Retreat, withdrawal Diplomacy is necessary Strategic AvoidanceNegative Consequences Decisions are made by default and inaction Individual self-esteem erodes and team morale fades Creative inputs are unspoken 17. Meet Me Halfway 18. CompromisingCharacteristicsWhen Appropriate to use Each wins and loses something Temporary settlement Negotiation approach Mutually exclusive goals Meet me halfway Consensus has failedNegative Consequences Neither party may be completely satisfied with the result The solution is only short term Both parties may feel as if they had sold out 19. Highest Common Cause 20. CollaboratingCharacteristicsWhen Appropriate to use Win/win approach Issue has high impact on all Cooperative, teamwork Situation is emotional Highest common cause Buy-in needs to be increasedNegative Consequences Requires an extensive amount of time Other priorities and tasks are left behind The process can be undermined by those unwilling to embrace 21. Conflict Style Chart Assertive COMPETING COLLABORATINGArgumentativeProblem-SolvingASSERTIVENESS - Self COMPROMISING Concessions Unassertive AVOIDINGACCOMMODATINGLaissez-FaireToleranceUncooperativeCooperativeCOOPERATIVENESS - Others Adapted from Conflict & Conflict Management by Kenneth Thomas in the Handbook of Industrial and Organizational Psychology 22. A Model for Resolution 23. Resolution ModelExplain in Neutral TermsObtain FeedbackAgree on the IssueExplore Possible SolutionsReview & Action Steps 24. Explain in NeutralTerms Benefit of the Doubt Allow room to save face Talk about behavior and results Consider the effect on others Keep people and problems separate Use I statements Never say Never avoid absolutes 25. Obtain FeedbackCheck your understandingParaphraseAsk Questions 26. Steven Covey 27. Set Ground RulesCreate a safe environment Respect, Boundaries, ConfidentialityConfirm mutual commitment Connect to shared values, goals Focus on long-term benefits 28. Agree on the Issue Make sure the issue is defined Ask why five different ways Uncover the underlying driver Emotional vs. Task-Oriented All other issues should be tabled Deal with one at a time Its okay to take a break and reconvene later 29. Brainstorm SolutionsInvolve the other personCome up with multiple solutionsMake sure they are realistic 30. Take ActionReview and agree on Action StepsSchedule next check-in dateTake Responsibility Own it! 31. ComplaintsDistractionsSilence vs. ViolenceDeny/Justify/Attack 32. The ComplainerAbdication of responsibilityListen and empathizeEngage in adult problem-solving Lets analyze the cause Prioritize is it worth solving How does the person plan on solving 33. DistractersBrings side issues into the discussion Table the distracters for the time being, for later discussionAttempts to change the issues Refocus back onto the issue at hand, restate and structureRelives the past Structure the discussion as going forward, letting go 34. Silence vs. ViolenceSilenceViolence Withholding meaning from the Forcing meaning into the poolpool of understandingof understanding Often a system of avoidance Often a system of competition Could be an unwelcome May be masked as helpfulpartner to accommodation collaboration Passive-Aggressive Aggressive Creating a safe environment is Reasserting ground rules isshort-term approachshort-term approach Building trust through one-on- Reinforcing cooperativeones is long-term approach behavior is long-term approach 35. Deny/Justify/AttackDJA CharacteristicsDiffusion Techniques Deny denial that a problem Paraphrase understandingexists, or that the facts arebefore defensiveness escalatesvalid Keep asking questions until Justify justify behavior byPoint of View is fully exploredcriticizing the process, Once POV is exhausted, comesituation, or people involvedback to the issue and treat Attack transition from separatelydefense to offense by verbal If necessary, allow time andattacks, threats or intimidation space between discussions 36. Possible Interventions Stop attacking Acknowledge, empathize, normalize Transition from past to future Gently probe for underlying interests Self-disclose; open up the channels Refocus to a neutral objective 37. Identify the ConflictMatch the Style to the SituationRole Play 38. Personal Action PlanWrite down a conflict in your lifeWhat style matches the situation?Prepare a discussion outline Know what you want before you ask for itSet a date & place for discussion Plan for neutrality and privacy 39. A positive attitude may not solve allyour problems, but it will annoyenough people to make it worth theeffort Herm Albright