Chapter 4

Emotions, Stress and Human Relations

Research on Emotions

Ignored emotion, preferred rational thought

Amygdala is linked to fear and anger

Positive emotions, left hemisphere; negative emotions, right hemisphere

Brain chemicals affect emotions

Facial expressions affect emotions

Thoughts Influence Emotions

Activating Event

Cognitive Appraisal

Self-talk

Irrational Beliefs

Catastrophizing – making it worse than it is (Bad omen?)Overgeneralization – Will it always be this way? (always or never)

Or just often?

The myth of causation.Albert Ellis – ABC modelA=activating event; C=consequent emotion; B=intervening beliefs/thoughtsAre you afraid of hurting someone’s feelings?Letting the pot boil (over).

Irrational BeliefsThe need for approval

Everyone must like me

Leads to compromise

Compromise leads to confusion/cognitive dissonance

The tyranny of shouldsJust world hypothesis

If we try to live right, we should be blessed or rewarded.

People get what they deserveBlaming the victim

Irrational Beliefs

PerfectionismI should be able to handle this.

Don’t get help.

Don’t accept yourself.

Myth of helplessness.I can’t do anything about the situation.

Addressing Irrational Beliefs

Self-talk

Cognitive therapy

Sadness: Are you depressed?Are you physically tired for no reason?Do you feel worthless?Do you feel hopeless?Have you lost interest in activities?Have you lost interest in people?Have your eating or sleeping habits changed?Can you think clearly? Or do you feel “foggy”?

What causes sadness & depression?

Life events (loss, grief)

Depressive realism

Pessimistic thought patterns

Physical exhaustion

Depression is contagious

Guilt

Unforgiveness, grudges

What to do about sadness.Cognitively appraise the problemTreat yourselfExerciseSocializeLaugh, find something funnyDistract, read a good bookAccomplish something

Small chore

Help someone elseIf non of these are working, or you can’t make yourself do them, get help.

Anger

Anger is an emotion.

Aggression is a behavior.

Direct Expression of Anger

ConstructiveCount to 10

Do not ambush

Choose your battles

DestructivePhysical aggression

Verbal aggression, e.g., name-calling

Relational aggression, e.g., gossip,slander

Indirect Expression of AngerDestructive

Getting drunk, doing drugsTearing up propertyDisplacementCatharsis (letting off steam) does not work very well

ConstructiveExerciseRelaxationPsychological Detachment (The situation, but not your reaction, may be out of your control.)Cognitive restructuring )accentuate the positive)Prayer and meditation

Express Your Anger

Do express your anger.

Unexpressed anger does not go away.

Over time it will build up and cause trouble.

Special cases.Anger with yourself.

Anger with God.

Happiness

What is it and what factors are related to it?

Subjective Well-Being

self-perceived happiness or satisfaction with life

used along with measures of objective well-being

physical and economic indicators to evaluate people’s quality of life

Experiencing EmotionDoes money buy happiness?

Year

100%

90%

80%

70%

60%

50%

40%

30%

20%

10%

0%

Averageper-person

after-tax incomein 1995 dollars Percentage

describingthemselves asvery happy

$20,000$19,000$18,000$17,000$16,000$15,000$14,000$13,000$12,000$11,000$10,000

$9,000$8,000$7,000$6,000$5,000$4,000

1930 1940 1950 1960 1970 1980 1990 2000

Percentage very happy

Personal income

Experiencing Emotion

Feel-good, do-good phenomenonpeople’s tendency to be helpful when already in a good mood

Experiencing Emotion

Values and life satisfaction

MoneyLove

1.00 2.00 3.00 4.00 5.00 6.00 7.00Life satisfaction

0.6

0.4

0.2

0.0

-0.2

-0.4

Importancescores

Experiencing Emotion

Adaptation-Level Phenomenontendency to form judgments relative to a “neutral” level

brightness of lights

volume of sound

level of income

defined by our prior experience

Relative Deprivationperception that one is worse off relative to those with whom one compares oneself

Experiencing Emotion

Researchers Have Found ThatHappy People Tend to

Have high self-esteem (in individualistic countries)

Be optimistic, outgoing, and agreeable

Have close friendships or a satisfyingmarriage

Have work and leisure that engagetheir skills

Have a meaningful religious faith

Sleep well and exercise

However, Happiness Seems Not MuchRelated to Other Factors, Such as

Age

Gender (women are more often depressed, but also more often joyful)

Education levels

Parenthood (having children or not)

Physical attractiveness

Other Factors Affecting Happiness

Perceived personal controlSet and achieve realistic goals

Optimism

Genetics?Left hemisphere, frontal lobe

Easy temperament

How to be happier

Keep busy with challenging, but manageable tasks

Count your blessings

Find good relationships, social networks

Look on the bright side

Exercise (regularly)

Laugh!