“Awareness!! to!! Action! Coaching”!docshare01.docshare.tips/files/29834/298346517.pdf ·...

Copyright*2012.*Mario*Sikora*www.awarenesstoaction.com*

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“Awareness!!to!!Action!Coaching”!"

By"Mario"Sikora"


2"

!

Awareness!to!Action!Coaching!An#Approach#to#Using#the#Enneagram#

By"Mario"Sikora"

"

There"are"two"basic"approaches"to"

coaching,"as"there"are"to"many"things:"

the"tactical"approach"and"the"strategic"

approach."The"tactical"approach"

focuses"on"behaving"differently—stop"

doing"this,"start"doing"that."The"

strategic"approach"takes"a"broader"

view,"focusing"on"patterns"of"thinking"

that"influence"our"behavior"and"

modifying"those"patterns"so"that"it"is"

easier"to"change"behaviors"with"great"

longBterm"success.""

"

An"effective"coach"uses"both"

approaches."Sometimes"a"client"simply"

needs"a"quick"fix,"a"new"behavior"that"

they"simply"hadn’t"thought"of"before."

For"example,"recently"I"was"working"

with"an"executive"who"liked"to"catch"

up"on"email"late"at"night."The"problem"

is"that"while"it"is"a"convenient"time"for"

her"to"work,"it"made"her"subordinates"

feel"that"they"should"also"be"working"

at"that"time,"and"that"they"needed"to"

respond"to"the"boss’s"emails"

immediately."This"meant"they"were"

staying"up"past"midnight"responding"

to"emails"that"could"easily"wait"until"

the"next"day."The"simple"tactical"

advice"I"gave"her"was"to"use"the"draft"

folder—write"the"emails"at"night"and"

send"them"in"the"morning."It"was"a"

simple"solution"to"a"problem"that"she"

could"easily"adopt."

"

Often,"however,"behavioral"change"is"

more"complicated"than"a"simple"

tactical"switch."Many"times"clients"are"

unable"to"do"something"that"they"

already"know"they"should"be"doing."

They"know"they"should"be"more"

patient"with"a"particular"subordinate,"

for"example,"or"perhaps"be"more"

comfortable"asserting"themselves"in"a"

seniorBlevel"staff"meeting."Something"

keeps"them"from"making"the"change,"

however;"in"their"head"they"know"they"

should"behave"in"a"different"way,"but"

something"in"their"gut"keeps"them"

from"changing."This"is"usually"because"

they"are"experience"some"kind"of"

cognitive"dissonance—they"genuinely"

believe"that"the"change"would"be"

beneficial,"but"they"hold"an"even"

stronger"belief"that"causes"an"internal"

conflict"regarding"the"change."In"these"

situations,"the"stronger"belief"will"win"

and"the"new"behavior"will"be"difficult"

to"incorporate."(For"example,"a"Six"

may"understand"at"an"intellectual"

level"that"they"need"to"take"more"

risks,"but"their"deepBseated"need"for"

security"will"undermine"their"efforts"

to"do"so.)"

"

The"Enneagram"is"an"excellent"tool"for"

coaches,"but"it"is"easy"to"see"the"model"

as"a"guide"to"tactical"changes—“If"you"

are"a"Five,"you"need"to"connect"to"

other"people"more;”"“if"you"are"a"Six,"

you"need"to"overcome"your"fears;”"etc.""

"

There"is"nothing"wrong"with"these"

nuggets"of"tactical"advice,"but"if"the"

For"more"information"about"the"Enneagram,"visit"www.enneagramlearning.com."

"

For"more"information"about"consulting"and"executive"coaching,"visit"

wwwe.awarenesstoaction.com."


3"

coach"focuses"on"the"“what"to"do”"

without"resolving"the"“why"to"do”"

obstacles,"they"are"merely"skimming"

across"the"surface"and"any"changes"

that"a"client"is"able"to"make"will"likely"

be"shortBlived."Coaches"operating"this"

way"miss"the"true"value"of"the"

Enneagram—helping"people"expose"

and"resolve"unconscious"conflicting"

commitments."Trying"to"make"tactical"

changes"without"resolving"the"

cognitive"dissonance"is"like"trying"to"

implant"an"organ"from"a"donor"with"

the"wrong"blood"type;"the"host"will"

reject"the"change"in"a"short"time."

Resolving"these"commitments"helps"

clients"change"their"story"about"the"

world,"reducing"cognitive"dissonance"

and"creating"fertile"ground"for"the"

change"to"take"place.""

"

The"rest"of"this"article"will"discuss"

how"to"incorporate"the"Enneagram"in"

a"strategic"way"and"provide"a"brief"

overview"of"my"approach"to"coaching,"

an"approach"I"call"“Awareness"to"

Action"Coaching.”"(“Awareness"to"

Action"Coaching”"takes"it’s"name"from"

the"book"I"coauthored"with"Robert"

Tallon,"“Awareness"to"Action:"The"

Enneagram,"Emotional"Intelligence"

and"Change,”"which"describes"the"

Awareness"to"Action"change"process."

The"“Awareness"to"Action"Coaching”"

program"and"approach"I"offer"through"

Enneagram"Learning"International,"

however,"is"a"significant"expansion"of"

that"model.)"

"

At"the"heart"of"all"strategic"coaching"

interventions"is"helping#the#client#switch#from#short5term#solutions#to#long5term#problems#to#long5term#solutions#to#those#same#problems."Understanding"the"EnneaBtypes"as"

manifestations"to"an"overreliance"on"a"

particular"adaptational"strategy"helps"

to"identify"what"shortBterm"solutions"

the"client"is"relying"on"and"it"can"be"

used"to"help"the"client"develop"more"

effective"longBterm"solutions."

"

Good"strategic"coaching"is"grounded"

in"the"effective"use"of"solid"heuristics.""Heuristics"are"mental"models"or"“rules"

of"thumb”"that"help"to"guide"our"

thinking"in"solving"problems."Good"

heuristics"help"us"narrow"down"the"

possible"causes"of"the"problem"and"

provide"a"structure"for"creating"

solutions."As"the"term"“rule"of"thumb”"

implies,"heuristics"are"not"fixed"laws,"

they"are"useful"approximations."Good"

heuristics"can"be"invaluable"aids"to"

our"thinking,"but"they"should"never"be"

counted"on"to"work"in"every"situation.""

"

The"“Awareness"to"Action"Coaching”"

program"centers"on"a"series"of"

EnneagramBbased"models"that"have"

proven"to"be"useful"to"me"in"my"work"

with"leaders."These"models"help"

narrow"down"the"highBprobability"

obstacles"to"the"clients"growth,"and"

once"we"understand"the"obstacles"we"

can"apply"the"Awareness"to"Action"

process"in"removing"them.""

"

Those"models"are:""

• The"Three"Instinctual"Biases"

• The"Nine"Strategies"

• The"Nine"Accelerators"

• The"Nine"Core"Qualities"

"

In"addition,"the"program"incorporates"

the"leadership"models"described"in"my"

article,""“Awareness"to"Action"

Leadership”"

(http://mariosikora.blogspot.com/p/

awarenessBtoBactionBleadership.html)."

In"a"sense,"the"models"in"ATA"

Leadership"identify"what"leaders"


4"

should"be"focused"on"improving;"the"models"in"ATA"Coaching"provide"the"

coach"tools"for"helping"them"do"so.""

It"is"important"to"note"here"that"the"

coach"should"always"be"focused"on"the"

change"the"client"needs"to"make"

whether"it"fits"with"the"coach’s"

assumptions"about"the"client"or"not."

For"example,"it"is"easy"to"assume"that"

because"someone"is,"say,"a"Two,"they"

will"need"to"focus"on"taking"care"of"

their"own"needs."After"all,"Twos"are"

often"viewed"as"selfless"helpers"who"

are"always"worrying"about"others"

instead"of"themselves."This"is"not"

always"the"case,"however;"many"Twos"

receive"feedback"from"others"that"they"

are"actually"too"focused"on"their"own"

needs"and"that"they"seem"insincere"in"

their"attempts"to"help"others."I"

recommend"that"the"coach"always"try"

to"get"some"kind"of"objective"feedback"

on"their"clients"(say,"through"a"360B

degree"assessment)"and"focus"the"

intervention"around"the"real"needs"

rather"than"start"focusing"on"issues"

that"some"book"says"people"of"a"given"

type"should"work"on."

"

That"said,"I"have"noticed"a"patter"of"

common"derailers"that"seem"to"appear"

time"and"again"in"each"of"the"EnneaB

types."Being"aware"of"these"derailers"

not"only"helps"the"coach"be"on"the"

lookout"for"particular"patterns"of"

behavior,"they"can"be"very"useful"in"

helping"to"assess"EnneaBtype."For"

more"of"this,"please"see"Appendix"D"of"

“Awareness"to"Action.”"

"

The!Three!Instinctual!Biases!I"have"written"in"other"places"about"

the"importance"of"understanding"the"

instincts"for"coaches."(You"can"find"an"

article"at"http://www.eB

junkie.com/shop/product/468474.ph

p"or"view"a"series"of"videos"at"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R

tEecjPBsTM&list=UUee48kwcjLl8gcaC

z58BJoA&index=5&feature=plcp.)"

Suffice"it"to"say"here"that"the"instincts"

are"at"least"as"important"as"the"EnneaB

types"in"helping"clients"get"unstuck,"

and"I"will"write"more"on"them"in"

future"articles."

"

For"this"article,"I"will"just"point"out"a"

couple"of"things"about"the"instincts:""

"

First,"I"use"different"names"for"the"

instincts"than"are"normally"used"in"the"

Enneagram"world."This"is"partly"due"

to"the"awkwardness"of"the"term"

“sexual"subtype,”"but"it"is"also"due"to"

my"feeling"that"the"existing"names"

don’t"capture"the"full"scope"of"the"

phenomena"at"work"in"these"domains."

Thus,"I"refer"to"them"as"“Preserving,”"

“Navigating,”"and"“Transmitting”"

rather"than"traditional"“SelfB

Preservation,”"“Social,”"and"“Sexual”"

(or"“oneBtoBone”)."

"

Second,"there"seems"to"be"a"

predictable"relationship"to"the"

instincts;"if"I"know"which"instinct"is"

dominant"I"also"know"which"one"is"

underBdeveloped"and"which"one"is"a"

shadow"issue."This"is"a"tremendous"

aid"to"a"coach."

"

The!Nine!Strategies!"

Along"with"the"instincts,"I"immediately"

try"to"understand"the"role"the"nine"

strategies"play"in"hindering"my"client’s"

attempt"to"change."Neither"the"instinct"

nor"strategy,"or"even"both"of"them"

together,"will"be"the"root"of"every"

developmental"challenge"a"client"is"

facing,"but"they"are"the"root"of"a"


5"

disproportionate"number"of"problems"

so"it"is"useful"to"look"at"them"first.""

"

I"was"inspired"to"think"about"the"

EnneaBtypes"as"the"result"of"strategies"

when"reading"Claudio"Naranjo’s"

“Character"and"Neurosis,”"in"which"he"

briefly"refers"to"the"them"as"

“adaptational"strategies.”"He"writes"

that"it"is"“a"learning"under"duress"

characterized"by"a"special"fixity"or"

rigidity"of"what"behavior"was"resorted"

to"in"the"initial"situation"as"an"

emergency"response”"(p.6B7)."He"

doesn’t"say"much"more"about"this"idea"

but"it"stuck"in"my"mind"and"became"

the"kernel"around"which"my"view"of"

the"types"grew."

"

Each"strategy"is"represented"by"a"nonB

conscious"need"to"feel"a"certain"way."This"affective"need"shapes"the"way"we"

think,"which"in"turn"influences"our"

behavioral"choices"and"perception"of"

the"world."The"Six,"for"example,"is"

“striving"to"be"secure;”"they"need"to"

feel"secure,"they"think"in"ways"that"

increase"their"security,"and"thus"they"

behave"in"ways"that"they"believe"will"

increase"their"security."Understanding"

this"is"a"critical"starting"point"in"

shaping"a"coaching"strategy"for"the"

client."

"

The"nine"strategies"are"listed"in"Table"

1.

"

"

TABLE 1: The Nine Strategies !

One !Striving!to!be!Perfect"

Two Striving!to!be!Connected"

Three Striving to be Outstanding

Four Striving!to!be!Unique"

Five Striving!to!be!Detached"

Six! Striving!to!be!Secure"

Seven! Striving!to!be!Excited""

Eight! Striving!to!be!Powerful"

Nine! Striving!to!be!Peaceful"

"


6"

"

The"central"problem"we"have"when"it"

comes"to"creating"change"is"that"we"

develop"behaviors"and"attitudes"that"

worked"early"in"life"as"responses"to"

shortBterm"problems"and,"because"the"

brain"likes"to"simplify"life"by"fixing"on"

a"solution"that"seems"to"work,"those"

responses"became"habits"that"

sometimes"prove"ineffective"later"in"

life."For"example,"the"Six’s"risk"

aversion"is"a"good"shortBterm"solution"

to"helping"him"feel"more"secure"when"

he"is"younger"but"it"can"hold"him"back"

later"in"life"and"perhaps"even"

jeopardize"his"career."The"shortBterm"

solution"becomes"a"longBterm"

hindrance."

"

Once"the"coach"understands"the"way"

the"strategy"is"distorting"the"client’s"

view,"the"coach"can"apply"the"

Awareness"to"Action"process"as"I"have"

described"it"previously"(see"article"

here"http://www.eB

junkie.com/mariosikora/product/467

083.php#Notes+and+the+Melody+4"

or"video"here"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H

BOCyZA8uyI&feature=channel)"

"

At"the"heart"of"the"Awareness"to"

Action"process"is"the"idea"that"by"

rewriting"the"way"the"client"defines"

their"preferred"strategy"they"can"

change"their"story"about"the"world"

and"change"from"being"trapped"in"

shortBterm"behaviors"that"undermine"

longBterm"solutions"to"facing"the"

world"in"a"way"that"is"flexible,"open,"

and"responsive"to"the"circumstances"

at"hand."Continuing"with"Type"Six"as"

an"example,"the"client"may"rewrite"

their"understanding"of"the"strategy"

from"“avoiding"risk"will"keep"me"

secure”"to"“if"I"don’t"learn"to"take"

some"degree"of"risk"I"will"be"less"

effective"at"work,"which"will"really"

threaten"my"security"because"I"might"

get"fired.”"

"

Understanding"this"rewriting"of"the"

strategy"will"help"coaches"avoid"

failure"caused"by"a"focus"on"tactical"

fixes"so"common"in"the"Enneagram"

literature."I"must"rewrite"the"story—

change"the"way"I"think—before"a"

mere"tactical"change"will"be"able"to"

take"root."If"I"believe"at"some"level"that"

the"new"behavior"will"undermine"my"

strategy—my"trusted"and"reliable"way"

of"approaching"life—I"will"ultimately"

abandon"that"behavior."

"

Change"occurs"not"by"trying"to"be"

something"different"than"we"are"but"

from"a"gradual"process"of"redefining"

our"preferred"strategy"so"we"are"able"

to"be"adaptive"rather"than"stuck"in"

outmoded"views"of"the"world.""

"

The#Connecting#Points#"

In"“Awareness"to"Action,”"we"referred"

to"the"strategy"found"at"one’s"

Enneagram"point"the"preferred#strategy"because"it"is"the"one"that"we"rely"on"most"commonly"as"a"nonB

conscious"default"pattern."That"is,"it"is"

our"preferred#strategy"for"solving"problems."People"familiar"with"the"

Enneagram"know"that"there"is"a"

significance"to"the"connecting"points"

of"the"diagram."We"referred"to"the"

connecting"points,"commonly"referred"

to"as"the"stress"and"security"points,"as"the"support"and"neglected"strategies."

Our"rationale"for"this"reflects"the"bias"

of"a"coach—we"get"into"trouble"when"

we"fall"back"on"the"support"strategy"to"

reinforce"our"preferred"strategy"or"


7"

when"we"neglect"a"strategy"that"could"

be"useful"to"us"at"a"given"time."The"

developmental"goal"is"not"to"be"more"

like"one"type"or"less"like"another,"it"is"

to"learn"to"use"the"strategies"in"a"

healthy,"adaptive"way"rather"than"

avoid"them"or"use"them"

maladaptively.""

"

A"fixated"Nine,"for"example,"who’s"

preferred"strategy"is"“striving"to"be"

peaceful,”"will"overuse"this"strategy,"

neglect"to"use"the"strategy"at"point"

Three"of"striving"to"be"outstanding"at"

critical"times"when"the"strategy"is"

called"for,"or"fall"back"on"the"strategy"

at"point"Six"of"“striving"to"be"secure”"

in"maladaptive"ways"in"order"to"help"

them"maintain"a"feeling"of"being"

peaceful."As"a"coach"working"with"a"

Nine,"I"would"be"looking"out"for"these"

patterns"and"helping"the"client"rewrite"

their"strategies"so"they"can"be"used"

appropriately.""

"

"

The!Core!Qualities!"

Again,"the"strategies"heuristic"does"

not"address"every"problem."Another"

model"I"use"is"what"I"call"the"“core"

qualities,”"fundamental"aspects"of"the"

human"condition"that"become"stunted"

in"our"childhood."Very"often,"the"client"

is"not"aware"of"how"this"stunting"of"

the"core"qualities"affects"them,"but"

when"stress"builds"and"they"are"

particularly"selfBreflective,"they"will"

see"how"the"stunting"has"left"them"

feeling"deficient"and"vulnerable."

"

Again,"I’ll"refer"the"reader"to"a"

previous"article"(http://www.eB

junkie.com/mariosikora/product/467

082.php#Notes+and+the+Melody+5)"

and"rather"than"go"into"the"core"

qualities"in"detail"here"I"will"refer"the"

reader"to"that"article."The"nine"core"

qualities"are"listed"in"Table"2.""

"

The"model"of"the"core"qualities"helps"

the"coach"further"refine"what"issues"

may"be"obstacles"to"the"growth"of"the"

client."Continuing"on"with"EnneaBType"

Nine,"as"a"coach"I"know"to"be"on"the"

lookout"for"issues"related"to"the"

quality"at"point"Nine"and"the"

connecting"points"of"Three"and"Six."I"

know"that"there"is"a"high"probability"

that"the"stunting"of"these"three"

qualities"is"an"issue"that"needs"to"be"

addressed."I"know"that"at"a"deep"level,"

a"level"the"client"may"not"be"often"

aware"of,"they"feel"that"in"they"are"in"

some"way"deficient"in"benevolence"(the"feeling"of"being"basically"good),"

value"(a"feeling"of"inherent"worth"independent"of"accomplishment),"and"

will"(the"confidence"in"one’s"ability"to"survive"and"prevail"over"one’s"

circumstances)."This"knowledge"helps"

me"better"understand"the"internal"

obstacles"the"client"faces"and"how"to"

help"the"client"overcome"them.

"

"


8"

TABLE 2: The Core Qualities !

One !Objectivity"

Two Compassion"

Three Value

Four Individuality"

Five Intuition"

Six! Will"

Seven! Joy"

Eight! Vitality"

Nine! Benevolence"

"

"

"

The!Accelerators!"

The"dilemma"with"the"core"qualities"is"

that"they"are"not"something"that"you"

can"force"to"grow."They"were"stunted"

in"childhood"and"need"time"to"grow"to"

maturity."The"analogy"that"I"use"is"that"

they"are"like"sapling"on"its"way"to"

becoming"an"oak"tree;"you"can’t"pull"

on"the"sapling"to"make"it"grow"but"you"

can"create"an"environment"that"will"

nurture"its"development."This"is"

where"the"fourth"model,"the"

accelerators,"comes"into"play.""

The"Accelerators"are"practices"

particularly"useful"to"people"of"the"

correlated"EnneaBtype."Practicing"the"

accelerators"helps"us"grow"and"be"

more"flexible,"but"in"particular"it"helps"

us"create"a"state"of"mind"that"helps"the"

core"qualities"mature."(The"complete"

list"appears"in"Table"3.)"

"

Again,"using"EnneaBtype"Nine"as"our"

example,"the"client"would"benefit"from"

practicing"generativity"(cultivating"the"next"generation"through"coaching,"

mentoring,"etc.),"purpose"(clearly"defining"and"articulating"the"“why”"of"

their"life),"and"faith"(acting"with"confidence"today"based"on"evidence"of"

past"performance)."

"

"


9"

TABLE 3: The Nine Accelerators !

One !Acceptance"

Two Empathy"

Three Purpose

Four Individuation"

Five Conscious!Practice"

Six! Faith"

Seven! Enjoyment"

Eight! SelfMDiscipline"

Nine! Generativity"

"

"

"

Putting!it!Together!"

Combining"the"strategies,"core"

qualities,"and"accelerators"gives"the"

coach"a"very"robust"model"of"what"

obstacles"hinder"each"EnneaBtype"

from"creating"change"and"a"clear"

action"plan"for"overcoming"those"

obstacles."Charts"that"show"these"

elements"combined"into"diagnostic"

and"remedial"charts"for"EnneaBtype"

Nine"are"shown"in"Figures"1"and"2."

"

Part"of"the"“Awareness"to"Action"

Coaching"Program”"is"learning"how"

to"apply"the"nine"diagnostic"and"

remedial"charts"in"work"with"a"

client."The"diagnostic"charts"serve"as"a"

primer"of"things"to"watch"out"for"

while"the"remedial"charts"provide"a"


10"

guide"for"what"to"do"about"the"

problems"the"coach"identifies."

"

One"should"not"assume"equal"

importance"in"all"nine"issues"

shown"on"the"diagnostic"charts;"

at"any"given"time"one"or"a"few"of"

the"issues"will"be"acute"and"the"

others"are"of"less"concern."The"

chart"is"meant"as"a"reminder"to"

the"coach"of"obstacles"to"watch"

out"for"during"an"engagement.""

"

Likewise,"the"Remedial"Chart"

shown"in"Figure"2"is"not"meant"

as"a"recipe"for"working"with"a"

Nine;"most"coaching"engagements"are"

far"too"short"to"allow"for"working"on"

all"of"these"issues."It"is"meant"as"a"

guide"for"the"coach"to"appropriate"

corrective"action"once"the"diagnosis"is"

made.""

"

While"no"model"is"complete,"I"have"

found"that"there"are"few"obstacles"to"

growth"whose"removal"cannot"be"

hastened"by"use"of"the"charts,"

combined"with"a"knowledge"of"the"

dynamics"of"the"instinctual"biases.""

"

""

Summary!"

Awareness"to"Action"Coaching"is"a"

robust,"EnneagramBbased"approach"to"

working"with"clients"at"both"the"

strategic"and"tactical"levels."The"

models"described"here"help"the"client"

modify"the"way"he"or"she"thinks"about"

the"world,"learning"to"seek"longBterm"

solutions"rather"than"shortBterm"

solutions"to"the"developmental"

challenges"they"face."Combining"it"

with"the"Awareness"to"Action"

Leadership"model"

(http://enneagramlearning.blogspot.c

om/2012/03/awarenessBtoBactionB

leadership.html)"adds"a"tactical"(or"

“whatBtoBdo”)"element"to"the"coach’s"

work"with"his"or"her"clients."""

"

In"future"articles"I"will"talk"about"some"

of"the"qualities"that"a"good"coach"

should"have.""

"

Stay"tuned…."

"

(For#more#information#on#the#how#to#attend#the#“Awareness#to#Action#Coaching”#training#program,#contact#me#at#[email protected].)#

"

"

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