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Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
Managing The Unmanageable
Starting and Stopping
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STOP THINGS THAT HURT YOUParents often feel they are in trouble too.
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Stop Living Through Your Kids
• Having dreams for your children does not mean they want them
• You cannot be embarrassed by your kids. Embarrassment is totally subjective.
• Just because you may have done the same thing as your child doesn’t mean you have to approve it.
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Stop Listening To Others
• Do not accept insulting or judgmental opinions of your parenting.
• Defend your child without defending his/her actions.
• Family and friends are the most likely to remember where you went wrong. Do not engage.
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Stop Isolating Yourself
• No matter how tempting do not cut yourself off from the rest of the world.
• You are one of many parents dealing with these issues. “Why me?!” is not useful.
• Anger and blaming become more common when you “circle the wagons”.
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START THINGS THAT HELP YOUTake back your life.
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Act like a grownup
• Appearance matters. Don’t dress like coming to court is an every day event. (Work clothes are always welcome!)
• Defend your child without defending his/her actions.
• Stop complaining. Period.
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Start expressing your opinions
• I will NOT accept any judgment of my parenting.
• No. We did not all do this when we were his/her age.
• Thanks for your advice but we are working with professionals.
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Reach Out To Others
• • There is nothing better than talking with
people who know just how you feel.• Parents new to the system are overwhelmed
and need the voices of experienced ones.• Perhaps you don’t need help but someone
might need yours.
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Remember
Stop living through your kids. Start acting like a grownup. Stop listening to other people’s opinions. Start expressing your own. Stop isolating yourself. Start reaching out to others who understand how you feel.
Ashley and Me All Rights Reserved
www.victoriakamm.com 567.225.0877 [email protected]
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