Chapter 14

Coming Apart: Separation and Divorce

Chapter Outline

• Measuring Divorce: How Do We Know How Much Divorce There Is?

• Divorce Trends in the United States• Factors Affecting Divorce• The Stations of the Divorce Process

Chapter Outline

• Marital Separation• Children and Divorce• Child Custody• Divorce Mediation• What to Do About Divorce

Measuring Divorce

• Ratio measure of divorces to marriages– In 1998, there were 1,135,000 divorces

and 2,256,000 marriages—a ratio of 1 divorce for every 1.98 marriages.

Measuring Divorce

• Crude divorce rate– Number of divorces in a given year for

every 1,000 people in the population.– In 2002, there were 4.0 divorces for every

1,000 Americans.

Measuring Divorce

• Refined divorce rate – The number of divorces that occur in a

given year for every 1,000 marriages.– In 1998, the refined rate was 19 to 20

divorces per 1,000 married women, meaning 2% of marriages ended in divorce.

Measuring Divorce

• Predictive divorce rate – Allows researchers to estimate how many

new marriages will likely end in divorce. – The prevailing estimate is between 40 and

50% of marriages entered into this year are likely to become divorces.

Marriage Through the 20th Century and Beyond

Year Number Rate Per 1,000

1900 709,000 9.3

1920 1,274,476 12.0

1940 1,595,879 12.1

1960 1,523,000 8.5

1980 2,406,708 10.6

1995 2,336,000 8.9

2001 2,327,000 8.4

Divorce Through the 20th Century and Beyond

Year Number Rate Per 1,000 Married women

1900 55,751 3

1920 170,506 8

1940 264,000 9

1960 393,000 9.2

1980 1,189,000 22.6

1995 1,169,000 19.8

2001 NA NA

International Variation in Refined Divorce Rate

Divorces per 1,000 married women

Country 1980 1990 1995

United States 23 21 20

Canada 10 11 11

France 6 8 9

Japan 5 6 6

Sweden 11 12 14

United Kingdom 12 13 13

Stations of Divorce

– Emotional– Legal– Economic– Co-parental– Community– Psychic

Uncoupling

• The process by which couples drift apart in predictable stages.

• The initiator voices complaints and begins to think of alternatives.

• Eventually the initiator ends the relationship.• Uncoupling ends when both partners

acknowledge the relationship cannot be saved.

Separation Distress

• Affected by:– Whether there was forewarning of the

separation.– The length of time married.– Who took the initiative in leaving.– Whether someone new is found.– Available resources.

Dating Again

• Dating is important for separated or divorced people.

• The greatest social problem is meeting other unmarried people.

• Dating is a formal statement of the end of a marriage and permits individuals to enhance their self-esteem.

Economic Consequences of Divorce

• Women generally experience dramatic downward mobility after divorce.

• Economic consequences include:– Impoverishment of women– Changed female employment patterns– Very limited child support and alimony

Stages of Children in Divorce

• Initial stage - Lasts about a year, when turmoil is greatest.

• Transition stage - Lasts several years, in which adjustments are made to new family arrangements.

• Restabilization stage - When changes have been integrated into the children’s lives.

Children’s Developmental Tasks When Parents Divorce

• Acknowledging parental separation• Disengaging from parental conflicts• Resolving loss• Resolving anger and self-blame• Accepting the finality of divorce• Achieving realistic expectations for later

relationship success

Child’s Adjustment to Divorce: Factors

• Open discussion prior to divorce• Continued involvement with noncustodial

parent• Lack of hostility between divorced parents

Child’s Adjustment to Divorce: Factors

• Good psychological adjustment to divorce by custodial parent

• Stable living situation and good parenting skills.

• Continued involvement with the children by both parents

Child Custody

• Generally based on one of 2 standards:– The best interests of the child– The least detrimental of the available

alternatives.• The major types of custody are sole, joint,

and split.

Noncustodial Parents

• Often feel deeply grieved about the loss of their normal parenting role.

• As a result of custody disputes, as many as 350,000 children are stolen from custodial parents each year.

• Most are returned home within a week.