When I Am Gone, Will You Continue Living?

8/3/2019 When I Am Gone, Will You Continue Living?

1/45

When Im Gone, Will You Continue Living?

Prologue:

Haine-sama. Haine turned around, shocked to see the dark haired boy who hadbeen her friend, as well as Takanaris, but was now on Shizumasas side. What was he

doing there?

UmIm looking for some stones. Have you seen them? One has Takanari-

samas name on it, and the other has Shizumasa-samas name, Haine explained, paniccoursing through her body. Toya nodded and revealed that he had been holding it in his

hand the entire time. The round stone was about the size of a billiard ball, with the

character for Shizumasas name engraved in it. Thats one! Haine cried, excited.

Huh? Haine gasped as Toya tossed it into the water. Toya-kun! How couldyou?! Without it, Shizumasa-sama will! Have you any idea what youve done?

Toya spoke for the first time since he had whispered her name, his voice low andsinister, he said, Yes.

Haine fell down to the ground as he fired off a shot with the gun he had pulled out

of his suit. She could see the smashed CD and the smoking gun, but all she could think ofwas why Toya was being so scary.

Toyakun? She whispered, every bone in her body shaking with terror.

Toya shook his head and advanced, the gun aimed at her. Shuichiro-sama placed

only Shizumasa-samas stone in the garden from the start. Hes merely waiting for you to

give up looking for Takanaris stone. Haines eyes widened at how foolish shed been.Shuichiro had tricked her, and she could never save Takanari now Its time to put an

end to a farce like this, he continued, the gun only wavering slightly in his firm grip,Ill kill youand then myself.

Haines face crumpled, the pain of this loss drawing an X across her heart. Toyawould kill her, and she could never see Takanari again. He would be lost to the shadowy

refines of the Togu household once again But why?! she asked.

The twins have put the past behind them and have made up! Toya shouted

angrily. They finally have a chance to be as close as they used to be! As long as yourenot around! he calmed down a little, levelling his gun with her heart, his eyes narrowing,

Its ridiculous for those two to start fighting over you again, Haine-sama! So I want you

to disappear, right here.

Haines amber eyes narrowed to match Toyas, and she moved quickly, lurchingforward and grabbing Toyas arm. Toy struggled, trying to shove her off.

Let go of me, Haine-sama!!

You let go, Toya-kun! What are you thinking?! This wont solve anything,

okay?! Haine cried, panicking at the thought of losing not only Toya, Takanari andShizumasa, but her life as well. She didnt want to die. She wanted to live


2/45

What are you doing?! Toya demanded, as they fought over the gun, both

pulling as hard as they could, neither availing. Arent you scared?!

Haine shook her head, her whole body trembling, Im terrified!

Toya glared at her, shouting, You might die, you know?!

I dont want to!! Haine shrieked, letting the gun slip from her shaking hands,giving Toya the split second opportunity to pull the gun away, point it at her and pull the

trigger. Haine screamed, but no air came out as the burning pain seared through her

shoulder. She turned her head slightly, grabbing her bloody shoulder in pain. If she hadmoved a little less, the shot wouldve just nicked her, but she had moved too much, so the

shot had gone through a muscle, that operated between her arm and her shoulder. The

blood was flowing quickly, and she didnt know what to do.

Haine-sama! Toya cried, dropping the gun and stooping next to her.

II Haine began, but her entire body was slowing down, and her voice gaveout as she collapsed the rest of the way, her eyes seeing nothing but blackness.

Chapter 1:

Haines eyes fluttered open, the pain in her shoulder so immense that she cringed,

making new pain shoot through it. She looked up at the white ceiling, hearing the familiarbeeping of a hospital. She slowly sat up and looked around. Takanari was holding her left

hand, his head resting next to her hip, his eyes closed. She could see dark lines under his

eyes. He hadnt slept much. She slid her hand out of his and brushed his hair out of his

face gently. She loved him so much she turned to the other side to see that Shizumasawas also there. He smiled at her as her eyes met his. There were no bags under his eyes,

which told her that he had not been at her bedside every second since she had been here.

This relieved her, because it meant that Shizumasa understood that she loved

Takanari, and he was allowing them to be together. Hi, Haine muttered, thoughspeaking was difficult with the bandages around her chest. She coughed and Shizumasa

put his hand on her back, panic flashing in his eyes.

Good afternoon, Haine-sama, Shizumasa replied after her coughing had died.

How long have I been out? Haine asked.

Shizumasa sighed, Youve been in and out for almost a week. Takanari has beenawake up until ten minutes ago; I got here and made him sleep. Hes going to be mad I

made him sleep just before you woke, though

Really? Haine asked, her heart soaring as she looked back at the sleepingTakanari. He looked so innocent and helpless in his sleep

Yeah, Shizumasa stood up. Go back to sleep. When hes awake, you canreawaken. Im going to go order you some food

Haine nodded and put her hand back in Takanaris. Shizumasa-sama, she called

as he was about to leave.

What? he asked, turning in the doorway.


3/45

I love him, Haine whispered, gesturing at Takanari.

Shizumasa smiled, shrugging, I know.

Haine began to cry after he left, clutching Takanaris hand, and tears streamed

from her eyes. She knew that this pain was no good. Nobody could survive this and

recover completely. Haine knew she could not survive.

Ushio knocked lightly on the door, her grey eyes cast down to gaze at her feet.

She heard no response, so she looked up and opened the door a crack, looking in. Senri

stiffened, but did not look up from the piles of paper on his desk. His pen made ascratching noise as it flew across the surface of the paper, then he flicked his wrist and

put the pen down, turning in his revolving chair to meet Ushios gaze.

Amamiya-kun, he said, surprised, I thought it would be Shizumasa, checking

for more information on Haine, again.

Sorry to disappoint you, Ushio muttered, glancing over his shoulder to see what

he was working on. He quickly blocked her view with his arms, knocking his glassesaskew. Ushio reached forward, but he raised his arm to deflect her hand.

What do you need, Amamiya? Senri asked, pushing his glasses up his nose with

his fingers.

Ushio shifted uncomfortably, covering her face with her hand, blushing. Well

she started, I want to know about Haine. She will recover, right?

Senri sighed, turning back to her papers. You have no need to know.

Please! Ushio demanded, I think I know already. You can lie to Shizumasa,

and you can lie to the rest of the Togus, but I can see the truth in your eyes! Haine

Otomiya is going to die, isnt she?Senri exhaled deeply and took Ushios hand, I cannot save her.

Ushio choked a sob, grabbing his hand which held hers, You can do nothing?

Have you done everything?

Ive no hope that Haine-chan will live. She has little time, and I doubt she will

even regain full consciousness before her body succumbs, Senri shook his head, I wishI could save her, for Takanari, for Shizumasa and for you, Ushio. Senri let go of her

hand and grabbed her shoulders, leaning forward to kiss her.

Ushio shoved him away, stepping towards the door, Youre only saying that

because I remind you of Shoka.Senri turned back to his papers, picking his pen up, Get some sleep Ushio. Once

this is all over, you may not have much time or thought for it.

Haine-sama! Takanari cried, jerking awake as Haine watched him with sleepy

eyes.


4/45

Morning, T-Takanari-sama, Haine smiled, Youve been here all this time,

havent you?

I couldnt leave, Takanari muttered, Not without knowing you were alright.

Haine sighed, Im fine, Takanari-sama

Takanari grinned, Good. I wonder when Shizumasa will be back with an updatefrom Senri

Takanari, Haine said his name earnestly, leaning forward, despite the pain,

Where is Toya-kun?

Takanaris eyes widened and he looked down, He disappeared. After he brought

you back, he fled. We did a thorough search of the forest recovering the gun. Did Toyashoot you?

Yes, Haine replied, regretting that she had to tattle on Toya. But he did it for

the best! He wanted youyou and Shizumasa to... be friends again.

Right, Takanari snorted, Do you forgive him?I Haine almost said she didnt, and then caught herself, Of course. He did it

for you.

I planned on going to find him after you got better.

Haine sighed, Go find him, Takanari.

Takanaris eyes travelled up to see Haines, and he bit his lip. Are you sure?

Positive, Haine confirmed, taking his hand. She didnt feel so certain

Thank you, Takanari whispered gratefully. Haine knew he was deeply worried

about his friend, and though she didnt want to die without him being near, she knew it

would hurt him less.

Haine looked away, towards the window, which was opened to let in some fresh

air. She couldnt meet Takanaris eye, knowing that she might never see him againShe

sighed and squeezed his hand. He returned her squeeze, then let go.

Ill be back, he promised, leaning forward, Dont do anything I wouldnt letyou do.

Would you let me die? Haine wondered, but simply put one arm around his neck

and kissed him. Takanari smiled one last time, kissed her hand and left the room. Haine

rubbed her hot cheeks as tears streamed from her eyes. The pain in her chest hurt somuchShe wondered what Takanari would do to Toya if she died from this wound

An hour later, she began to drift into sleep, but was startled back to consciousness

by a cold hand placed on her forehead. Maora! she screamed, sitting up as Maora fell

back in a peel of giggles. Ushio sat down in the chair Takanari had been in, and Maoraleaned forward, running his fingers down the bandage curiously.

Does it hurt? he asked, flipping his cropped blond hair and smoothing his skirt.

Haine didnt even think twice about Maora being a guy anymore. Or about Maora being

the postman.


5/45

Yeah Haine smiled wryly, It hurts a lot

Ushio leaned forward, resting her chin on the edge bed, her arms stretched across

Haines blanket, and Haines torso. Haine smiled fondly at her friend, who looked up at

her with her big eyes and whispered, Did Senri tell you what he told me?

What did he tell you? Haine asked, leaning back on her pillow.About your condition Ushio prompted, exchanging a glance with Maora.

Haine looked to the window again, closing her eyes, Im going to die, arent I?

No! Ushio shouted, standing up suddenly, knocking her chair to the floor.

Maora grabbed Haines hands at spoke urgently, Of course you wont! Senri-

sensei will do whatever he can to help. Dont even say something like that!

Haine struggled to sit up, not pulling her hands from Maoras, I dont need to sayit. I can feel it, she pulled her hands away from Maoras and touched her shoulder,

Right here. I dont need anyone to tell me Im going to die.

Maora choked an angry sob back, and Ushio smashed her fist into the wall, tearstumbling from her eyes, her cheeks turning bright pink with frustration and despair.Haine looked down at her hands, then the bandages wrapped around her shoulder. The

gnawing pain had not left since she had awoken, and she could feel herself losing to it

again, giving in to the pain and hurt she was feeling. She closed her eyes. Im going tosleep a bit

Chapter 2:

Haine woke up sweating and in massive pain. Her shoulder was throbbing and her

arm was numb. She cried out, but covered her mouth to muffle her scream. She looked

down at the floor with a vacant gaze, sweat falling from her forehead, tears spilling fromher eyes, and blood soaking the tightly wrapped bandage.

Doctor she whispered, wincing as she spoke. When she said it, she meant to

call one, but she had not noticed that someone was already there, checking the levels of

whatever was being pumped into her wrist through the IV tube.

Oh! Otomiya-kun, she heard Senri exclaimed, his head shooting up from thelittle bag hanging from the stand. Do you need some painkillers? I dont want your

lastyour last day in the hospital to be uncomfortable.

Im dying so soon? Haine asked, shaking in pain.

No, Senri said, too quickly, IIm sorry, Haine

Haine shook her head, lying back down on her pillow, It isnt your fault. Its allmy faultI was selfish, and I couldnt bring myself to justbe with Shizumasa. I

neededno, I wanted TakanariSo I tried to have Shizumasa displaced. Sensei, if Id

have succeededwhat would Shuichiro Togu have done to Shizumasa?

I cannot answer, Senri shook his head, Shuichiro is as unpredictable as he isold.


6/45

Oh. Haine held her fingers up in the air and looked up at the blood-stained

fingers that she had been clutching her wound with not long ago. Sensei

Yes?

Tell me about my condition.

Well Senri sighed, You probably havent much time left. I tried my bestthroughout multiple surgeries to remove the bullet fragments, but it was a smaller bullet,

and when it struck your bone at such a speed, it shattered and I cannot, for all my years of

training, remove it.

So Im going to bleed out slowly, or get an infection? Haine asked, more tearsslipping out, a sob choking from her throat, which was constricting in horror.

Senri was silent, and Haine knew what this meant.

Toya will be blamed, wont he? Haine asked, but she already knew that Toya

was the one Takanari would blame, and Shizumasa would follow his older brothers lead.

She did not want that to happen. If she died, she wanted the brothers, all of her friends

and Toya to be happy. Happy to live. Haine didnt get to live, and her first taste ofjealousy soared through her.

Yes, Senri nodded, writing on a clipboard now.

Haine bit her lip, and then looked up at Senri, But if my death was an accident,Sensei, nobody would be blamed.

No.

Sensei Haine begged, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed, Please.

Im going to die, so cant Toya be spared?

No, Otomiya-kun. I refuse to be involved in your death, Sensei shook his head,

putting a hand on Haines shoulder to push her back into her bed.

Ill die anyway! Haine screamed, grabbing his arm and pushing, falling to herknees on the floor, I beg of you. Give me an overdose of painkillers, so then Toya will

not be removed from the Togu family.

Senri sighed, grabbing Haines good arm and pulling her to her feet. She

staggered and grabbed the bed rail with her weak arm for support, but let go as a sharppain shot through to her shoulder again.

Haine-sama, I sympathize, but Senri shook his head, I cant kill you.

Then let me do it myself! Haine begged, sitting on the end of her bed, pulling

her knees up to her chest. Her pyjamas clung to her skin with sweat, and the spot of bloodaround her shoulder had been getting increasingly larger since she had woken up.

Senri sighed, grabbing the needle, Ill fill it with a half-dose extra. If that doesnt

work, I refuse to give you more. Are you sure you want to do this?

Haine looked down at the needle, then reached out and took it shakily from his

hand, looking up into his eyes, Yes. Thank you. But alsodo you have some paper anda pen? So that I can write a note for Takanari?


7/45

Yes, Senri nodded, handing her a loose sheet from his clipboard, then the pen

he had been writing with before. When I tell the Togus that youI will tell them that

you mustve woken up in such pain you decided to give yourself a shot and accidentallyoverdosed.

Good, Haine mumbled, opening the pen and beginning to write, then throwing

it down in frustration.

Goodbye, Haine-sama, Senri whispered, turning to close the door behind him.

Haine sighed and wrote the first thing that came to mind on the paper, then grabbed theneedle. She didnt want to do this, but knew she had no choice so she would have to do it.

For Toya-kun.

Haine yanked up her sleeve, exposing her bare wrist, which was pale and sweaty.

She dabbed it with an alcohol soaked cotton ball, then lowered the needle into her skin.

Goodbye, Shizumasa. Goodbye, Takanari.

Haine was surprised when she woke up and felt solid ground beneath her. Shescrambled to her knees, her wide eyes skimming her surroundings. She was dead. No

way could she have survived that much morphineso why did her fingers still feel, herheart still beat?

Haine touched her shoulder but felt nothing. She looked down and saw that her

wounds had healed entirely. The bandage was gone, and so was the gaping cut she had

thought it had concealed. In fact, her clothes were gone as well, and she was wearing acompletely new ensemble. Her long hair was loose, although she had had it in a ponytail

before, and she was wearing a simple white dress. Her feet and arms were bare, and when

she stood the rest of the way, she found that the dress fell to her knees.

Where am I?! Haine cried, turning her head. She was not surrounded by dark orlight, nor was it warm or cold. The air was still and neutral and she was standing on a

marble floor. The walls were high and a thick creamy color, and the roof was a stained

glass design of flowers and spirals.

Nobody answered her question, so Haine began walking. If this is heaven, shemuttered, Somebody shouldve been around when I woke to give me a warm

welcome

Haine Otomiya! she heard someone, probably a girl, yell from behind her.

Turning around, she saw the beautiful girl smiling and waving as she ran towards Haine.

Who are you? Haine asked, pulling on a strand of her hair.

Im Meroko, she introduced herself, curtsying. Haine examined the girl

curiously, and with more than a little jealousy. Meroko had wavy pink hair that fell down

to her waist, and eyes that were, eerily, Haine thought, pink as well. Not albino pink,

justpink. She was wearing a white dress and white heels, and Haine could see that shehad feathered white wings, tucked behind her back.

Youre an angel? So, then, I am in heaven Haine sighed and looked over

Merokos shoulder.


8/45

Meroko bit her lip, the sincerity in her smile was gone. She seemed to be forcing

herself to continue smiling as she began to speak again, Actually, not quite. You see,

youkilled yourself.

Haine blinked, despair welling in her heart, Does that mean I sinned? I dont getto go to heaven?

Well, Meroko said, looking down and running her fingers through her hair,

Not exactly. See, God has a special place for those who give up on life. In fact, Im like

you. I also killed myself.

So I get to be an angel? Haine asked, perking up. Being an angel didnt seem

bad, because Meroko was nice, and she seemed happy.

No. Im sorry, but the suicidal people we get become Shinigami, Meroko

explained, Harbingers of Death.

Shinigami? Hard Bingers of Death? Haine asked, confused.

Harbingers of Death, Meroko corrected, Basically, you get sent to earth and

have to collect the souls of those destined to die.

I have to kill people?! Haine shrieked, stepping back.

No, not kill. Justreap. Reap their souls which are already prepared to pass on.

If no one does the jobwell, thats when trouble starts. Like, earth would becomecluttered with lost souls, you know?

I Haine began to cry, I didnt want to die! I did it for Toya! Honestly!

Haine Meroko began to pat her back, and Haine shoved her face into her

hands.

I didnt want this! I justjust Haine shook with sadness, I wanted everyone

to be happy. Why am I being punished?!

No, it isnt punishment, Meroko said, grabbing Haines chin so that their eyesmet, Once, I thought it was too. But I met a girl. She changed my life. Well, whatever

you call it after you die. I was supposed to kill her, but I couldnt, because she was my

friend. She told me that when I became a Shinigami, it was not Gods punishment. It washis way of giving us a second chance.

Haine sighed and looked down, Who do I have to kill?

Not Meroko began to argue, then sighed. No one yet. Youre going into

training. In fact, your trainer is an angel, but he is also

They both looked towards the door as someone walked in. It was a man, withblond hair and empty yellow eyes. Merokos face lit up and she crossed the room to him,

taking hiss hand. Haine Otomiya, this is Izumi, my ex-partner from when we were

Shinigami, and my current partner for being an angel. Hes going to train you to be the

best Shinigami weve had.


9/45

Chapter 3:

Ah! Haine cried as she felt the air rushing around her, her hair dancing behind

her back, her black dress flapping around her bare legs.

Haine, she heard her partner, Takashi, moan from behind her, Why do you

insist on flying? Its exhausting. We can just teleport to earth, you know.But Haine protested, her big eyes filling, If we do that, I wont get my

proper first experience. I want to feel the rushing breeze on my skin. It excites me, to be

back on earth after so long

For a Shinigami, six years isnt long.

To me, it was an eternity. Izumis a total slave-driver! Haine whined, twistingher long, blond hair into a bun, which she let go of and it promptly unravelled and flew

out behind her again.

But he was among the best, and he all but named you his heir, by choosing you

to be the only person he trained! If youre lucky, we might both follow in his footsteps

and become angels as well, Takashi smiled, his short black hair blown off his face,making it look less angular and more childish. His dark green eyes met Haines amber

ones and he grinned right from one ear to the next. His ears twitched happily when Hainereturned his smile.

Thatd be lucky, Haine agreed, imagining herself in a pure white dress with

angelic wings like Meroko, who had become her idol.

When their feet touched ground, Haine immediately summoned a mirror, running

her fingers through her hair, which had grown out past her hips since she had died. Shehad recently added a long, red streak to her hair, to match her dark red high heels that she

had made into part of her costume. She had designed her unique Shinigami outfit long

ago, and she wore a thin black tube dress that went down to her knees, with ruby-coloreddetails and a small bow. She had a black cloth choker with a ruby sewn to the front, and

she had pointed black cat ears nestled in her hair, which was loose, with a few strands

pulled back on either side, as shed worn it when she was alive.

In contrast to her partners green and black clothing, Haine felt completely badassdressed like she was. Because of her skill and obvious potential, the Shinigami called her

Black Cat. The Shinigami of bad luck, the most powerful, likely to rise to a high position.

That was Haine. Some people even went so far as to call her Mysteres successor. Hainescorned whoever said that. Meroko had told her that Mystere had once been in charge of

all Shinigami, their creator. But after an incident that Meroko never fully explained,

Mystere disappeared, and the angels took charge of the Shinigami.

Haine sighed, turning back to her partner, Whose life is the first I get to claim?

Takashi rolled his eyes, his hair already falling back into his face. Haine knew thiswas not his first job, so she felt uncomfortable, like a newbie. I dont know yet. The

boss says to just be on the lookout for a potential accident. Thats all they said. I dont

even think were claiming a life. Just putting fate on course again.

Aww, Haine muttered, dejected, Oh well, maybe another day


10/45

Definitely, Takashi nodded, putting his hand on her cheek, My Black Cat

Haine grinned and pulled away, Stop it, Takashi! She giggled and jumped up

into the air, Lets go look for disaster!

Takashi jumped up after her, Alright!

Haine laughed and began to fly towards the lit up city, not even a mile away.

People are boring, Haine complained, All they do is walk and talk, walk and

talkI think I mightve seen one stalk since this started. Its dull, Takashi, lets turn into

humans and go to the arcade!

Takashi sighed and jumped off the roof of the building, hovering in front ofHaine. He put his finger on her nose and made a tsking noise, No can do. Were on a

mission.

Cmon, Haine insisted, grabbing the long sleeve of his black trench coat.

Takashi willingly followed her as Haine flew down, landing in a dank and darkalley beside a bakery. Mmm, he murmured, smiling as he began his transformation.

Haine was already in her human disguise, big, dark sunglasses pushed up on herforehead, a furry jacket and a black skirt paired with brown ankle boots. How do I

look? She asked, Human?

That and beyond, Takashi snickered, Ears, Haine.

Ah! Haine giggled, putting her hands over them. When she moved them, the

ears were gone and she looked completely human. Takashi himself seemed to bestruggling to control his tiger ears. Haine giggled and cast a quick spell. A beanie cap

appeared on his head, and the two laughed for a moment, then Haine pointed to the light

of the street, Lets go. This alley is creepy.

Yeah, Takashi agreed, throwing a nervous glance over his shoulder as Hainerushed ahead into the busy street. He quickly followed, though he felt like every step was

being watched.

Takashi! Haine said suddenly, turning around to face him, I want to go to

some places. I recognize she looked toward a huge building to the east of them.

From when you were alive? Takashi asked, panicking, Its been eight years,

right?

Haine counted off on her fingers, Seven. Nobody will remember me. I used to go

to school there. Thats Imperial Academy, I know it!

Takashi nodded, then closed his eyes, Haine, you do remember what the angelssaid, right? About the memory exception they gave the two of us? We are only allowed to

remember as long as we promise to stay away.

But they let us remember! Haine protested, Meroko said that we were allowed

to remember because it would be important later on


11/45

I know Takashi nodded, But you cannot show yourself to Takanari Togu.

No matter what, Black Cat. No matter what.

Haine nodded, looking at her feet. She doubted he would want to see her now,

anyway, with what shed become. She wasnt a good person anymore. Izumis traininghad made her cynical, short-tempered and judgmental girl. Not to mention she was still a

teenager, and Takanari would be about twenty-five.

Alright, Takashi said at last, Well go to imperial academy.

Yay! Haine squealed, clapping her hands and jumping up like a cheerleader,Thank you, thank you, thank you!

She leaned forward and kissed Takashi on the cheek, then ran in the direction of

her past, her heart racing excitedly as she got nearer. Takashi managed to keep up, and

when she stopped in front of the school, she looked at the people. The uniform was stillthe same, though some minor changes had occurred over the years since Haines absence

began. She grabbed Takashi and they ducked behind the gate, transforming into school

uniforms to match those of the students.

Haine giggled nervously as they entered the academys grounds. She felt like sheno longer belonged there, but the part of her that allowed her to be here at all was singing

a different tune. This was where she was meant to be. She spotted a girl wearing the

Student Council uniform, and she smiled, the recollections of those happy, innocent days

filling her heart with pain and happiness.

So this is where you went to high school? Takashi asked.

Haine nodded. And so much more. This place is where I fell in love, had my

heart broken, and healed it again. This is where I made my first real friends, came to

realise who I wasThis school is a part of me.

Its that important? Takashi asked.

Haine tilted her chin to nod, but found herself crying and shaking her head,instead, Its so much more important than that. Itsits

I understand, Takashi said, Its the place no words can describe. I have a place

like that, too

Hey! Why are you crying, sweetie? they both turned, and Haine quickly wipedher eyes, taking in the sight of a very familiar person, only with an extra seven years of

age and maturity added to her face.

UshiAmamiya...kun? Haine whispered, her eyes becoming saucers.

Ushio frowned, her short, curled hair bouncing on her shoulders as she moved toplace a hand on her hip, Do I know you? You look familiarYoure a student here,right?

Y-yes, Haine nodded, Uh, Im Haneko.

Haneko? Ushio repeated, raising her eyebrows, Why are you crying? Do you

need us to call your parents?


12/45

No! Haine said quickly, I washappy. I just transferred back here. I missed

this place.

Ushio nodded, You know me? I mean, you said my name before. My maiden

name, that is

You got married? Uh, no, I dont know you, Haine replied, kicking the groundwith her loafer, I justhave heard of you. From a friend.

A friend? Ushio cocked an eyebrow even higher, a doubtful sneer beginning to

form on her face.

Yep.

Right, Ushio shook her head, then clicked her heels together, Well, Haneko, Iam going to have to take you to the office, alright? By the way, Amamiya is not my

surname anymore, so you can refer to me as Narumiya-sensei, alright?

Haine nodded, Justcan I talk to my friend for a momentalone?

Ill be waiting over here, Ushio gestured to a place, where she stood and beganto write in a small notebook.

Takashi glared at Haine, You know her?

She used to be my best friend, Haine murmured, I dont think she recognizes

me, though. Go to the office. Make sure were both students by the time I get there.

Got it, Takashi nodded, Be careful, Haine-sama.

You too, Taka-kun. Haine whispered, waving as she ran towards Ushio.

Haine sighed as she and Takashi flew over the city. School had let out twenty

minutes ago, and both of them had influenced the headmaster into making them bothstudents. Haine had not seen Ushio again, and she hoped she never would, for Ushio

could recognize her at any point in time that she wanted to.

Takashi, Haine mumbled, We still havent prevented the potential disaster yet.What could it be?

They sent me a message a while ago. They gave us the only clue theyve got so

far. They said to watch for the children at play.

Children at play Haine repeated, exhaling deeply, Lets go to the park.

Therell be children there, for sure.

Alright, Takashi nodded, Lead the way, Black Cat.Haine laughed and turned left towards the park she had first learned of Takanaris

existence at. Takashi followed, but after a moment, he stopped, taking hold of her arm.

Im going to go search the other park we passed by, he informed her, gesturing

behind him, So dont do anything dumb, Haine.

I wont, Haine replied, continuing her flight as soon as Takashi let go. She wasglad she would not have to worry about him when she went to the park. Haine didnt like


13/45

pretending in front of him, but she knew her true weakness was pathetic and that it was

best if she feigned strength in front of Takashi and saved her feebleness for when she was

alone.

She landed behind a tree and quickly transformed into her human form, wearingnothing but a pair of black flats and a cream colored dress. O a second thought, she added

a coat over top. The park was beautiful in the golden sunset of a winter evening. Thesmall piles of snow glistened and sparkled like diamonds, and Haine could feel thewarmth of the sun sneaking into the coldness.

She walked around a bit, seeing happy parents with their children. She envied all

these families, who had never lost someone like she had lost Takanari, her family, and

her friends. Haine spotted a small memorial by the fountain, and she got closer, curiosityedging into her heart.

The memorial was small, made of solid white marble. It had an inscription in it,

that was not brand new, but obviously recent. Haine bent down and read it, her heart

racing as she read the words with blurry, teary eyes, again and again.

In loving memory of Haine Otomiya,

She loved all, and was loved by all,

May she rest peacefully, and forevermore,

God bless this girl, for she is angel.

Haine choked on a sob, her fingers trembling and cold, her lips wavering and her

hair blowing around her face. She could no longer see through her tears, and she tried to

wipe them up using her sleeve, but just ended up freezing her sleeve to her wrist.

Did you know her? a voice whispered from behind her, and Haine stood up,

turning quickly. Everything seemed to slow down at that moment as both she and the

other person did a double take, their eyes locked in amazement and horror. His face was

still the same as it had been the day she left seven years ago. It was warm, kind andbeautiful, the angles of his cheekbones, jaw and nose all the same as Haine remembered.

His hair was shorter, obviously cut recently, and he also had a more aged presence to

him. But, similarities and differences aside, he was still Takanari.

And clinging to his arm was a young, red-haired child.

Haine stepped back, bumping into the memorial. Takanaris step was three times

hers, and he reached out his hand to touch her cheek, but Haine quickly looked away,

then down at her feet.

Haine? Takanari breathed, his voice so sad and hopeful Haine couldntstop herself from looking up to meet his eyes. Her world was spinning around so quickly

she couldnt catch a grip on the reality before her. Takanari was alive, and he was well.

He had a child. If the little red-haired girl was his kid, then Haine had no right to be here.

He had someone else already. Takanari had a life, a family. He still had hope, as long asshe, Haine Otomiya, Shinigami, partner of Takashi Yoru, apprentice to Rio Izumi, stayed

away from him.

Haine bit her lip, turned around and fled.


14/45

Chapter 4:

You ran into him?! Takashi yelled, smashing his fist into a nearby building,

Are you freaking kidding me, Haine?

Im sorry, Haine apologized, her eyebrows drawn together with worry. I didnt

think it was a big deal. I ran away immediately.But he saw you! Did anyone else see you? Takashi demanded, his expression so

angry Haine had to look away, feeling incredibly guilty for withholding this truth since

yesterday. They were walking to school now, and several people had stopped to stare.Takashi himself had stopped as well, and Haine knew that someone would intervene soon

if she did not calm him down.

No, Haine hissed, grabbing his sleeve and making him walk again. She bumped

her shoulder against his and whispered in his ear, Stop yelling. People are going towonder. His kid saw me, but she didnt seem impressed or affected. She was probably

five or six, and

A kid? Takashi asked in a normal tone of voice, A child. Was the childplaying?

No, she was justwait, are you saying that this child may be the one werelooking for? Haine cried, drawing back in horror, She was too young. Surely such a

young girl couldnt be on the brink of death?

She shouldnt be, if she is, Takashi replied, Thats what were supposed to be

doing.

Haine nodded, Then I have to go back to the Togu residence later. In disguise, ofcourse. I need to investigate, see if she is in danger.

We both will, Takashi agreed, We have to be careful not to have a repeat of

yesterdays events, what with both Ushio Narumiya and Takanari Togu recognizing

you.

Ushio couldnt place my face, though, Haine sighed, feeling hurt that her best

friend had not known her, but also relieved that she need not tamper with Ushios

memories. But Takanari was an accident. I wont be so careless again.

See that you dont, Takashi nodded, Im going to go meet some friends.

Haine watched as he jogged off, swinging his bag in one hand, approaching agroup of male students. Haine passed by him and the laughing boys alone. All the girls

looked at her curiously, but none approached her to talk to her. Haine kept walking. Her

first class was Japanese, and she knew that would be troublesome. Even after sevenyears, her Japanese was still no good. Once she got in there, word would spread about

how dumb she was, and Ushio, obviously a teacher, would realize her identity.

Haine could not let that happen.

Suddenly, she stopped walking, realizing where she was. Her eyes widened as she

gazed up at the central stairs. Haine had not even thought that there may be a newemperor who would be the first to walk up the stairs in the morning. Haine was about to


15/45

leave when she heard the vehicle pulling up behind her. She turned around as the black

car slowed down and someone began to get out. Haine stood frozen in place, hoping to

see Takanari, or Shizumasa, getting out of the car with all eyes watching, as he had everymorning before, with Haine watching lovingly, waiting for her chance to make him return

that love.

But the man who came out of the car was not either of the Togu twins. It was ayoung man with shoulder length dark hair, pulled back in a ponytail. Haine gasped andstepped back, disappointed and embarrassed, she had forgotten to move out of his way

and look away. It was too late now, though, for he had already met her eyes with his pale

blue eyes.

UhIIm just Haine tried to explain, stepping out of the way, her eyesnever leaving his face. People had started to look up and over at them, confused as to

what stunt the new girl was trying to pull, staring him in the eye and getting in his way.

Youre new? he asked, his lip twitching as though he wanted to smile but

couldnt.

Y-yeah. In a way Haine looked at the people, who were all staring at her.Some were awed that the emperor was talking to her, others looked disgusted at her for

the nerve she had, getting in his way.

Well, I hope you enjoy it here, he said, brushing past her as the gates opened.

Haine stood a moment longer, and then turned to follow. She raced quicklytowards the room her first class was in, her heart racing nervously. She got to the

classroom early and sat down speedily, sliding her book bag under her desk.

Hey new girl, Haine turned to the door, where a catty sophomore was standing,

one hand placed on her hip with attitude. The girl was gorgeous, with short, reddish

brown hair that flipped out at the ends, just brushing the tops of her shoulders. Her skinwas creamy and natural, with a soft olive undertone.

Oh, Haine said, Hi, Im Haneko.

I know who you are, she sighed, strutting across the room and jamming her bag

under the desk next to Haines. And Im Mizuko.

Nice to meet you, Haine smiled, glancing at Mizukos uniform. Sure enough,she was the platinum. Haine had always imagined a proper platinum to look like that, to

have that rich atmosphere surrounding her. To look utterly fabulous, even in boredom or

casual clothing.

Mizuko leaned over, her nose almost touching Haines, So, Haneko, what did

Daichi say to you?

Daichi? Haine repeated, Is he the emperor?

Mizuko folded her arms across her ample chest as she leaned back, What hole

did you come from? Hes only the most powerful emperor Imperial Academy has seensince the Togus ran out of children to put in this school.


16/45

Oh. Really? Haine asked, nervous. Mizuko was intimidating, not only because

she was pretty, but because behind her golden eyes, Haine could see a flickering flame

that threatened to expose Haines true identity.

Yes, Haneko-chan. What family are you from? Youre asilver. You must havemade some massive contribution to be a silver on your second day, Mizukos eyes were

narrowed, her entire body shifted into a predators position.

Haine was surprised when she looked down and saw the badge and armband of a

silver on her uniform. She hadnt asked Takashi for thatnow she would stand out evenmore! Iyes. My father, um, AroTanamaya got me in with a large donation.

I see, Mizuko nodded, examining her fingernails, Ive never heard of the

Tanamayas.

Weve lived in America all my life. Father sent me here alone, Haine lied.

Mizuko raised her eyebrows, all her attention on Haine now, You live alone,Haneko-chan?

Um, I share an apartment complex with my cousinTakashi, Haine explained.Her and Takashi had decided to pretend to be cousins for the time being.

Hes the other new kid, right? Mizuko asked with an eager look on her face.

Yeah, Haine nodded, He used to go toa public school in the countryside. Butdad said he would pay for our apartment and schooling if Takashi moved in with me. He

didnt want me living alone, and Takashi and I are best friends. Like siblings, actually.

The platinum was smiling excitedly, How big is this apartment?

Haine bit her lip, Big.

Big enough for one more inhabitant? Mizuko asked.

Yeah, Haine said, then realized what Mizuko was asking, Are you implying

you want to move in with us?

Please, Haneko!? begged the other girl, looking ready to cry if Haine rejected

her. Its justif you knew my father, youd understand why I need to get away. But I

cant live alone, he wouldnt let me. But if I went to live with the Tanamaya heiress, he

wouldnt mind!

For a brief moment Haine was reminded of her Yanki days, when shed been so

sick of her father she would flee home every night and spend days at Ushios house. That

spark of pity and empathy made her nod her head unwittingly.

Really? Mizuko asked, her gold eyes shining like she had just won the lottery,Thank you so much, Haneko! You wont regret this!

Im sure I wont, Haine replied, though she was far from it. Takashi would kill

her. They would need to rent an apartment, tamper with the minds of every citizen in high

society and live normal lives if they wanted to fool Mizuko.

Haine groaned as the teacher walked in, and the class began. Takashi was going tohave her head on a platter.


17/45

Surprisingly, Takashi took it quite well. Its cool, Black Cat, he said when she

apologized, I dont mind. This is good.

Good? Haine asked, Takashi, well need to fix the minds of everyone with

social standing, so that they think Aro Tanamaya exists! Plus, well need to rent anapartment, which takes money. And, wed have to act like humans there, and at school.

How can we do all that? Meroko will killus!

Well find a way, Takashi replied, Haine, I wont let you flunk your firstmission. If the Shinigami lose faith in Black Cat, then all of us will have nothing. But if

you prove you can still be human anddo your job, you will be showing everyone exactly

what it means to be Black Cat.

I dont care about fame and power, Haine protested, I want to protect the kidwho needs it, and then I want out of here!

Because of Takanari? Takashi asked. Haines mouth dropped and her eyes

stung with tears. His words were like a full on slap, and Haine couldnt reply. Cmon,Haine-chan. Lets go find a big apartment to impress Mizuko with.

Haine sat in the middle of her new room, sorting through a box of things. Theyhad contacted Meroko, who had consented to them living on earth. Izumi and Meroko

both offered to send some boxes of stuff to make their lavish, luxurious apartment

homier. Meroko also told them that they were prohibited from using their Shinigamipowers at all, unless it was required to save the child they were supposed to.

She pulled out a small photo, which had her father and her in it, smiling happily

next to the Statue of Liberty. Haine sighed and put it on her bedside table. There were

also some books in the box, which she put on the small shelf above her semi-circle bed.Everything in the apartment was modern, down to the complimentary art on the walls.

Meroko had even sent them a fish tank, which Haine had put in the lobby. There were

three angelfish in it.

As she filled up her room, she wondered what would happen if she saw Ushio orTakanari again. Or anybody shed known, for that matter. What if Shizumasa showed up.

What if Maora, or Maguri, or her family found her out?

She couldnt hide from them.

Tears threatened to fall, but Haine wiped them back and continued decking up her

room. This was her room now, and no matter what happened, it would always be the first

imprint she made during her time as a Shinigami. From here on in, she was HanekoTanamaya. This was her new life, and hate it or like it, she would make the most out of it.

This was her redemption, her punishment. It was her salvation and her demise. It was hersecond chance.


18/45

Chapter 5:

Mizuko smiled when she saw Haneko running up the stairs towards the school.

Late on your third day? Mizuko asked, happy to see her new friend, Dont get into the

habit! Ill make sure you arent punished, though. Our maths teacher likes me.Math? Haneko groaned, I dont like math

I dont think you liked any class from yesterday much, either, Mizuko giggled,

having noticed Hanekos disinterest in all their classes. It was no wonder that Haneko

was in the same classes as her when Haneko was a senior.

Haneko giggled and blushed, I guess so

Come on, Mizuko smiled, leading Haneko to Narumiya-senseis class. She

wondered if Haneko would mention the apartment they were supposed to share, or if she

should bring it up herself. She finally bit the bullet and stopped walking, turning to

Haneko, Haneko-chan, about that apartment

Right! Haneko nodded, smashing one fist into the other palm, I was going to

tell you. Takashi said you can live with us. Of course, youll need to sign onto the lease

and get permission from your parents

Permission and money arent a problem, Mizuko shook her head, As long asyou are willing to let me move in, none of your requirements will present an issue. My

family has money and power, and my father will let me do this. Is there anything else?

No, Haneko said, but by the look on her face, Mizuko knew she was

withholding something else, but she didnt get the chance to ask, for Haneko beganwalking again, and Mizuko did not gather enough courage to stop her again before they

reached their class.

Mizuko Yamiya, Haneko Tanamaya, I see youve decided to bless us with your

presence, the teacher frowned as they walked in. Haneko did a double take, thencontinued walking, but Mizuko saw her hunch over and bite her lip. What was her

problem?

Im sorry, Narumiya-sensei. We were attending to student council work.

Haneko-chan had some problems with her schedule, but we figured it out,: Mizuko lied,batting her eyelashes and smiling serenely.

Well, Miss Yamiya, I appreciate you helping a student, but please choose more

efficient times to do your work. Sit down, Narumiya-sensei turned back to the black

board, scratching in a new formula with her chalk. Haneko sat beside Mizuko, quicklypulling out her notebook and copying the notes off the board.

Mizuko sighed. So now she was studious? Oh well, at least Mizuko got to move

out of her fathers homethat would be great. She was excited to get out on her own, to

live with a kind, sweet and dumb heiress and her handsome cousin.

Oh yes, she was excited.


19/45

Haine slung her bag over her shoulder as she had seen everyone else doing. It

must be a newer thing that students carried bags over their shoulders instead of in front of

them. Haine didnt mind, though, because she felt more like her Shinigami self, more likeBlack Cat when she had it over her shoulder with such attitude.

Haneko! she heard Mizuko call, and she turned on her heel, then stepped back

when she saw that Mizuko was not alone, but was standing beside the emperor whomshe had run into the other morning.

Mizuko-chan, andthe emperor Haine said with a smile, Its nice to meetyou again, Daichi-sama. Im sorry about last time.

Daichi nodded silently, one arm around Mizuko, the other holding his bag firmly

by his side. Mizuko smiled and wriggled out of his grasp, grabbing Haines free hand in

hers. Im so happy your letting me move in! Daichis happy, too. He says youre verynice and he wants to meet you, but I told him he already knew you! Small world, huh?

Very, Haine agreed, taking her hand back and resuming her walking, So what

do you need?

Well, Mizuko explained, I wanted to know when I should move in. Oh, and Ineed an address. And a phone number. Please.

Haine sighed, giving in to the girls eager smile, she didnt know how to handle

something like thisWas she supposed to be cool, or give in and dish out the

information? Finally, she opened her bag, pulled out a slip of paper and handed it toMizuko.

Thanks! Mizuko squealed, Im so excited to move in with you!

Same, Haine nodded, I have to go, now, though. Call me later, or stop by.

Actually, visiting would be better. Then you can get the lease and check out the place,

too.

Okay Mizuko nodded, looking down at her feet. What was wrong now?Haine wondered, as she turned away and continued walking. She was almost out of the

academys grounds when she felt a firm hand placed on her shoulder. She turned slowly,

expecting to see Mizuko, Daichi or Takashi. Instead, she saw Ushio, her cool gray eyeswatching her with apprehension.

UshNarumiya-sensei, Haine said, biting her lip again.

Come with me.

Haine followed the teacher, nervously. What did Ushio want from her? Had she

realized that Haine washerself? Or was she just suspicious because she had learned thatAro Tanamaya did not exist?

After a long time of walking, Ushio stopped and turned back to Haine, her eyes as

innocent and vulnerable as a puppys. Haine had an urge to hug her and tell her

everything was okay, but she resisted, knowing it would blow her cover. But when Ushiospoke again, she knew her cover was blown already.

Haine?


20/45

Haines eyes bubbled with tears. She couldnt bring herself to lie, nor could she

make herself confirm it. She wiped away the tears with her fists, but new ones came to

replace them, and she fell down crying, her eyes shut tightly, tears falling rapidly,sobbing and laughing at the same time. Sobbing because she had missed Ushio so much,

and because she knew she was going to break Ushio if she admitted her identity.

Laughter because, despite the risks and consequences, she knew it was too late to denythat she was Haine Otomiya.

I-II m-missed you, Ushio! Haine cried, grabbing the hem of Ushios pencil

skirt. Ushio fell down to her knees swiftly, wrapping her arms around Haine.

Haines crying died down a little, and she leaned back, looking up at her

childhood friend. The only girl she and ever trusted completely.

How did this happen? Ushio asked, and Haine did not see the woman with herhair pulled back in a tight chignon, wearing a crisp white blouse and black pencil skirt.

Instead, she saw the girl she had loved as a child. The girl who had saved her from losing

herself completely, with whom she had cried and laughed all her childhood away.

II killed myself, Haine explained, wiping away more tears, But I didnt goto heaven. I becamesome sort of Haine trailed off, then continued again, explaining

everything that had happened since she died seven years ago.

Ushio listened patiently, gasping and sobbing at all the right moments, rubbing

Haines back as Haine told her about the cruel and harsh lessons she had undertaken.Haine felt safe and secure under the caring eyes of Ushio, who would never judge her and

always hear her out, no matter how silly or irrelevant the matter.

Haine Ushio said at last as she finished her story, I wish I couldve

helped

No, Haine shook her head, It happened for a reason. I am back now, with thejob of protecting someone who needs it. Or taking a life, but I hope for the alternative

Ushio nodded, pushing a stray piece of hair behind her ear, But what about

Takanari? Have you seen him?

Yes, Haine nodded, I saw him when I visited my memorial. He had achild? Haine left the sentence open as she trailed off, giving Ushio the choice of

whether it was a question or not.

It isnt his, Ushio replied, Dont worry. Takanari Togu has not moved on.

Shizumasa, on the other hand

Despite Haines deep love for Takanari, her heart still ached knowing that

Shizumasa loved another. It wasnt fair to either of the brothers for her to feel this jealousy, but Haine could not control the emotions stirring in her heart. Oh, she

nodded, Who is she? Are they happy?

Her names Kahime, Ushio explained, Shes the illegitimate child of a richAmerican man. The Togus took her under their wing after her mother died, and

Shizumasa took a liking to her. The wedding is set for the spring.


21/45

Haine nodded. Weddingthe word made Haines body shake, for she had dreamt

of being wed to Takanari someday, to stand by his side and exchange rings, vows and

hearts. But being a Shinigami, that was impossible now.

Dont worry, Ushio sighed, taking Haines hand, Well fix it, I promise

The Togu household was dressed in black. Takanari had come home early and

announced that the family would mourn the loss of Haine Otomiya once again. This

thought bothered Kahime deeply, for Shizumasa had agreed immediately. He wassupposed to be hers, but he still clung to past memories of a dead girl.

That little slut, Kahime screeched to her maid, Maki. She may be dead, but no

common girl has the right to steal the hearts of both the Togu twins.

Yes, milady, Maki replied dutifully, tugging the strings of Kahimes corseted

dress. But Miss Otomiya was a charming young woman, full of life, perspective and

Kahime whipped around, glaring at Maki threateningly, Dont say another word

about her. I will clad my body in black for her, and I will respect Shizumasas love forher, but I will not accept that she is a good person. She was probably some bastard

daughter from a whore to the Otomiyas.

Maki nodded and silently retreated from the room, leaving Kahime to her angrymisguided thoughts. Kahime sat in front of the mirror, admiring her reflection. She had a

long, straight nose with a ski slope, and thin arched eyebrows. Her eyes were wide and

filled with every shade of gray, and her long auburn hair fell around her face in featherylayers. No matter how amazing this girl had been, Kahime was confident she was better.

Kahime, she turned to the doorway, where both Shizumasa and Takanari were

standing, dressed in black suits.

Darling! Kahime cried, rushing to hug Shizumasa, who patted her head before

stepping back to see her.

We are holding a service tonight, Shizumasa said in a monotone voice.

For what cause? Kahime asked, A charity?

No, its a commemorative for Takanari spoke, surprising Kahime. Takanari

barely ever spoke. It seemed he had lapsed into silence after the death of Haine

Otomiya.

H-Haine? Kahime exclaimed, Why are we holding services and going intomourning again,seven years after her death?

Takanari wishes it, Shizumasa said coldly, And he barely wishes anything

anymore, so this is how it shall be.

And together, the two left a flustered Kahime alone, her face red with rage and

her dress black as the midnight sky.


22/45

Chapter 6:

A-an invitation? Haine asked, To the Togus?

Right, Mizuko nodded happily, They want both of us to attend a memorial for

the deceased lady of the family. Well, she was never an official member, but she is

probably the best woman who has ever had a connection to the family. She was engagedto be married to Takanari Togu when she died. In fact, the Togus withheld the truth

about Takanari until she died, and then it was revealed and it caused quite an uproar. But

both brothers are balanced rulers of the family now, sharing duties and such. Although,Shizumasas marriage in the spring should give him an up on his brother

Haine sighed, Wow, I dont know much about all thisbut I cannot go to the

memorial. I never knew Haine Otomiya, so I wouldnt feel right

Nonsense! Mizuko insisted, You must come, Haneko! Think about yourfamilys reputation. The Tanamaya name rests in your hands.

Haine knew Mizuko would not give up, so she nodded, sliding off the edge of her

bed, which Mizuko had invaded with pictures and fabric scraps. Fine, Ill goBut if Takanari saw her and recognized her, she would leave right away. But she

had to see the red haired kid again, because something told her that child was the one sheneeded to save...or kill.

We need to pick dresses, Mizuko exclaimed, grabbing Haines sleeve. She was

sweet and fun, but also really spoiled and bratty, which bothered Haine. Not to mention

pushy and invasive. She had unpacked her own things into her room, then dragged herselfinto Haines room for some Quality Girl Time.

Haine nodded again, looking at the catalogue Mizuko was holding up. It displayed

four dresses, all long and soft and beautiful. Haine shook her head, Ill just wear an

ordinary black dress

No! Mizuko squealed, We have to look fabulous, so we have to choosebeautiful, poufy black dresses!

But isnt it supposed to be showing our respects, not showing off? Haine asked.

Well, obviously, Mizuko shrugged, But we have to look amazing anyway. I

mean, think about it. All of the most eligible guys in town will be there, right? Not tomention Takanari Togu, who mighthave an interest in high school girls. Hes not thatold

yet

Haine sighed and thought about Takanari. She really wanted to see him, to see if

he was okaybutshe could never do that. Takanari was trying to move on, andbecause hed seen Haine again, hed gone back into mourning. Hed dragged everyone

back into mourning Fine, she muttered, giving in to Mizukos pleas, Ill wear

whatever dress you choose for me.

Mizukos eyes lit up and she let out a noise best described as a squeal, and thenshe got off the bed as well, putting her hands firmly on Haines shoulders, Maybe youll

even find a boyfriend there, too!


23/45

Haine didnt mention that the only guy she would ever want was the only one she

could never have. She just shrugged and took the catalogue, flipping through it and

finally pointing at the first black dress she saw. This one?

Aww, Mizuko nodded, Its really pretty, Haneko. It would totally lookfabulous on you!

Haine looked down at the dress, really seeing it for the first time. It was long, and

black, of course, with a sweetheart top and long, tightly fitting sleeves. It was pretty,

Mizuko was right about that, but then her eyes landed on the price and she shook herhead, Maybe notlets look a little more

Why? Mizuko asked, her eyebrows drawing together. Its simple, like you

wanted, and its long and black. Its perfect! We should go there later and try it on

Haine bit her lip, and then nodded slightly. She would have to seriously pleadwith Takashi for the dress, because she found that she actually did want it. Mizuko began

to look through dresses for herself, choosing much more expensive, fancy dresses. After a

long time, she settled on a knee-length black dress that was similar to the white Marilyn

Monroe dress.

After several hours of gossiping and giggling, Mizuko went back to her room, and

Haine went into Takashis room. He was sitting in his desk, looking through a bunch of

papers, and he glanced up when she cleared her throat, holding up the catalogue.

Whats that? Takashi asked, squinting to see it. Pretty.

Haine shrugged, We were invited to my memorial service at the Togus andIwanted to wear this dress

Takashi took the catalogue and glanced at it, Im fine with the dress, Haine, but

the service? No way in hell. Or heaven.

Come on, Haine begged, sitting on his bed, legs crossed beneath her, I dont

want Mizuko to go alone, and its expected of me, as a member of high society, to attendthese thingsbesides, I need to see that kid who was with Takanari before. She might be

the one I need to deal with as a Shinigami

Haine, Takashi whispered, standing up and putting a hand on her knee, Youre

just hoping she is, because you want to see Takanari. You cant, Haine, that would ruinhim completely.

But Haine looked up at her partner, her friend, I need to see him. He doesnt

have to see me, I can make sure he doesnt. I swear, he wont see me.

Fine, Takashi nodded, Im going to get Merokos permission to be a Shinigamifor the night, and Ill make sure Takanari doesnt get any closer than necessary. And

about Narumiya Ushio

She knows, Haine confessed, shrugging, Im sorry

No, Meroko informed me of that, too Takashi sighed, You should have told

me sooner, though. I dont care, anyway, if she knows. Ushio is intuitive and she can


24/45

handle something like this. But what she cannot handle is the way you died. You didnt

tell her, did you?

tell her what? Haine asked, confused.

That it was her husband who gave you that dose of Morphine.

No, Haine shook her head, I never told her that. If she knew, she would hateNarumiya-sensei, and she just cant hate her husband.

Good, Takashi nodded, than put something in Haines hand, and when Haine

looked down, she saw a small, golden bank card. Go buy yourself a dress.

Chapter 7:

Haine tugged on the sleeves of her new dress, examining herself in the mirror,then turned to Mizuko, who was wearing her own dress, smiling and putting a pair of

long, dangling gold earrings into her ears. She also had on a pair of black stilettos and a

long, gold necklace that dangled on her chest, which was entirely visible with theplunging neckline of her dress. Haine smiled and put on her own necklace, which was

just a fancier version of the choker she wore when she was a Shinigami. It was basically

the same, except that it had much more red gems dangling off of it, and it was lower on

her throat, resting on her collarbone.

Mizuko grabbed her black clutch from Haines table, Ready to go?

Haine nodded, Yeah, except for she pointed at her head and Mizuko laughed.

Sorry, I forgot Mizuko had her own pulled back into princess styled updo,

and she had put curlers in Haines hair earlier, but forgotten to take them out. As she did,

Haine watched the perfect, round spirals fall from her head around her body. Her hair

was long again, and looking at herself, she thought of Maika, her mother.Thank you, she smiled at Mizuko, taking her own purse.

Mizuko smiled and opened the door to the street, Were taking my car

Haine nodded, her empty stomach turning in knots and performing somersaults.

Funny how even after she died, and became a Shinigami, she still had those familiar

feelings of restless anxiety in her stomach

Whats wrong? Mizuko asked, noticing the way she silently got into the car,

one thumb pressed to her lips.

I have buttered flies in my stomach Haine shrugged, smiling at Mizuko, who

gave her a strange look, then rolled her eyes and got in on the other side of the sleekblack limo.

So youre nervous? I figured you would be ecstatic! I mean, youll get to meet

all the members of our high society, which is probably very different from that of

America.

I bet, Haine agreed, not knowing the first thing about American society, andhoping no one would ask.


25/45

Mizuko giggled and then gave directions to the driver, turning to gaze out her

window. Haine watched her a moment, then turned to her own window, her eyes drifting

unfocused over the lit up city streets. In the middle of the night, the city was aglow withbright lights and cars, all shining in different colors and moving in different directions, at

different speeds, or not at all.

Haine shoved her hands in between her thighs, pressing them together so tightlyher hands grew numb, which was fine with her. It felt good to be this alive, so differentfrom all the years shed been hidden away, without a heartbeat, without a real body. But

this body she was wearing now was temporary, like a butterflys cocoon, which she

would have to be rid of when the time came to fly away. Far away.

Meroko had granted Takashi permission to be a Shinigami, with all his fullestpowers for the night, provided he did not meddle in any affairs of the night unless Haine

was discovered or near Takanari, Shizumasa or anyone else who may recognize her.

Haines thoughts fled as soon as she felt the motion of the limo stop, and she

looked at Mizuko who was stepping out; lead by the hand of a man in a suit, who Haine

recognized was her boyfriend, the Emperor Daichi.

Haine sighed and opened her own door, getting out on the street and rounding the

car, towards the house she had spent her last piece of life at, an eternity ago.

Welcome, she was greeted by a beautiful woman with wide grey eyes and long,

auburn hair, who was wearing a beautiful black dress that hung around her body in foldsof material, clinging off her defined figure like morning rain to a leaf.

Hello, Haine responded, Im Haneko Tanamaya, here on behalf of my father,

Aro.

Its a pleasure to meet you, the woman nodded, Im Kahime Smith,

Shizumasa-samas fianc.Haines jaw dropped in surprise. This beautiful woman was the American bastard

girl Ushio had told her about before. Haine had expected a snob, or someone poisonously

unfortunate looking. Kahime was not at all what shed imagined. Wow, lucky! Haineexclaimed, Im sure youre the envy of all the women here, marrying such a wonderful

man.

Kahime arched her eyebrows, then nodded slowly, Yesyes, I love him very

much. Hes such an amazing man, planning this entire thing for his brother, despite howlong its been

Haine bit her lip, I was wondering about thatwhy are they holding this

memorial now, seven years after she died?Kahime shrugged, leaning in conspiratorially, I want to know that myself

Shizumasa got angry when I brought it up, and Takanari-san has never been verytalkativeI think it may be because of thesigns. Religious signs, I mean. The

anniversary of Haine-samas death will fall on Friday the 13 th this year, not to mention a

solar eclipse will also occur the very same day. Perhaps Takanari is worried about thesestrange coincidences perturbing her rest in heaven.


26/45

Haine smirked, the irony of it almost making her laugh. If only Kahime knew that

she was Haine Otomiya, and her rest had definitelybeen disturbed. Well, that is strange

indeed, she agreed.

Isnt it? Kahime smiled, Come, Haneko-chan. Let us go greet some morepeople. It is my duty as the hostess, but I dont wish for our conversation to end just yet.

You know what? Haine smiled apologetically, I promised Id meet a certain

someone soon, so you can find me later and we can talk some more, alright?

Kahime nodded, Of course. Farewell, Haneko.

Haine turned and entered to lobby, observing all the elegant men and women,talking and drinking out of tall, crystal champagne flutes. She bit her lip and then lifted

the hem of her skirts and boldly stepped into the crowd. Several people looked at her with

questioning and curious eyes, but for the most part, she remained an anonymity.

Haneko! Haine turned to Mizuko, who ran up to her in a flurry of black skirts.Haine smiled and Mizuko quickly regained her composure, Haneko, this is fabulous!

Guess who just asked me about you?Who? Haine replied, not really caring, but granting Mizuko at least that much.

Takanari Togu! Isnt that fantastic? He just came up to me and asked to borrow

me from Daichi a moment. I thought he wanted to dance, so I politely refused, and thenhe told me it was about you! I asked Daichi to give us a moment of privacy, and he told

me he thought you were fascinating, and he asked me a bunch about you. Unfortunately, I

dont know you very well, so I had some difficulty answering, but

Haine held up her hand, suddenly feeling very hot. Takanari had seen her?Takashi was right; this had been a very bad idea from the startHaine smiled tightly, I

have to be excused.

She rushed away from Mizuko, who scowled and turned to go find Daichi. As

soon as she was far enough to be out of sight, she leaned against a wall, breathless andexhausted, and full of fear. This shouldnt have happenedShe slid to the ground and

pressed her face into her hands.

Are you alright? Haine turned to see who was speaking to her, and saw the little

red-headed girl from the park, holding a small black kitten in her arms.

Haine nodded, Yes, thank you

The little girl tilted her head and handed Haine her handkerchief, You look

worse than Taka-kun when he cries.

For a minute, Haine thought she was talking about Takashi, because that was hernickname for him, but then she realized it must be the girls nickname for Takanari. Oh,do I?

You do, the girl nodded, sitting down on the ground beside her and set the

kitten in her lap. Im Hana, by that way.

Haine nodded. Hana was an appropriate name for the little girl, because it meant

flower. ImHaneko, she replied.


27/45

Hana smiled, I thought you were Haine Otomiya when I first saw you.

Haine raised her eyebrows. How did the kid know about her? Oh really? Why

did you think that?

Hana reached out and touched Haines hair. Its long and beautiful, just like

Haines.Haine smiled, When did you meet Haine?

I didnt, Hana shook her head, Shes an angel, Taka-kun told me. He said she

was watching over the entire Togu household and blessing us with her smiles. He has a

picture of her, and I really loved it, because she does look like an angel. Are you anangel, Haneko?

Haine winked, Dont give away my secret.

I wont! Hana grinned, Haneko, you should come play with me, up in my

room. I have lots of dolls, and they are all as beautiful as you.

Haine took the black kitty out of Hanas lap and kissed it on the nose, No, Ishouldnt. I dont want to intrude.

Please? Hana asked, petting the kittys head affectionately.

Haine shook her head, Sorry, I cannot.

Oh

Haine sighed, giving the cat back to Hana and standing, I have to go now

Bye, Angel-sama.

Good bye, Hana-chan.

Chapter 8:

Haine didnt go back inside; instead she went around to the back of the house andbegan walking, her heart beating fast, until she found a familiar place. The woods had

darkened up as the evening was getting late, and she had to squint a little to make out the

shapes, but fortunately, the small ledge was illuminated by the moon, and Haineapproached it carefully, her eyes wet with tears. It was so familiar, the curve of the cliff,

the sparkling water beneath

And on the edge sat two round stones.

Her eyes widening, Haine made her way over to the stones, dropping to her knees.

Slowly, she picked up the first smooth stone, rubbing her thumbs over the kanjiit hadShizumasas name on it. Brushing her hair from her eyes, she picked up the second stone

in her other hand, feeling the cracks that had been smoothed down by years of water

lapping over the surface. Finally, she found the letters on that one, too, and knew that itwas Takanaris stone.

Wiping tears from her eyes, she pressed the stone to her lips, holding the other

one tightly in her lap. So after shed diedsomething in the Togu household had


28/45

changed. Theyd finally let Takanari become a recognized human being. Theyd retrieved

his stone and given him a life again

Slowly returning the stones to their spots, Haine stood up. She was still crying,

but her heart was happyshe was happy that things werent as bad for Takanari as theyused to be. She was happy that Shizumasa had a fianc, and that Ushio was married,

too

Pulling her curls over one shoulder, Haine began walking back towards the

mansion, humming off tune, and running her fingers through her hair. Her thoughts wereoccupied with curiosity about the child she had met beforeHana. She had seemed

familiar with Takanari, the way she called him Taka-kun and spoke of him so casually.

Perhaps she was his childbut that didnt fit the timeline. Hana had to be older thanseven. So she had to have been born before Haine died

Shaking her head, Haine realized she was back at the mansion, and was standing

right in front of two very familiar people. Maguri and Maora. Coming to a complete stop,

her eyes widening, she stumbled to find something to say. She knew her guilty face

didnt make it so easy to slip out of this situationbut what could she say.

You must be Haneko, the taller blonde man said, smiling a small smile and

nodding, I heard from Taka Taka that you looked a lot like her

Haine smiled the best she could and nodded as Maguri stared at her, not seeming

to believe that she really was Haneko. Y-yesthats me. Ive been told that a fewtimes this evening, already She giggled, It must be some affairs that happened back

in our family trees or something

Maora, who didnt even have a smile on at all, dressed in a short, poufy black

dress, gave her the once-over. Its almost astounding, as if Haine was frozen in time andbrought back to us exactly as she wasif I didnt know better, Id say you were her. But

youre far too young.

Tittering nervously, Haine shrugged, What can I say? Its just a weird

coincidence

Maora nodded, his eyes narrowing just slightly, suspiciously, as he glanced at

Maguri. Maguri, could you go get me a drink, please? Im parched

Shrugging, Maguri took Maoras empty glass and walked off, his shape quickly

disappearing in the nearby crowd.

Turning back to Haine, Maora smiled. Looping his arm through hers, he began topull her away from the more active part of the mansions yard, into the dark shadows

along the side. Almost as soon as they were out of sight, Maora let go of Haine andgrabbed her by the shoulders, his head dropped in a helpless position.

Panicking, wondering what Maora was doing, Haine shoved his hands off hershoulders and stepped back, What on earth?

Dont bother, Haine Maora whispered quietly, his gentle voice soothing,

even with the anger behind it.


29/45

HowIm not Haine, Haine insisted, Im Haneko. So please, dont scare me

like that

Ushio told me Maora said quietly, finally lifting his head, and Haine saw the

tears brimming his eyes. Her heart sank, but a small fuzzy feeling began to grow as shesaw Maoras face soften.

Ushioshe told youeverything? Haine asked, rubbing her arms nervously.

Yes, Maora nodded, She told meeverythingso theres no use pretending

around meMaguri doesnt know, thoughhe doesnt have to. Once youre done whatyoure here for, youll be gone again.we have to accept that. But Maguriyou cant let

him go through that again.

Maguri? Haine repeated, confused, Buthe hates me, anyways

Maora sighed, He doesnthate you. He adores you, Haine. Youre his friend.

He shows his affections differently, though. And when you diedhe blamed himself.Because we were the ones who got you in to see Shuichiro. We couldve stopped you

fromfrom getting killedif wed just found an alternative way of helping the twinsMaora? both turned as they saw Maguri approaching, an annoyed look on his

face. What on earth are you two doing here? I though you were gay, Mao-chan. And Iheard Haneko is into girls, too. Apparently shes living with Mizu

Oh, thats not it! Maora giggled, taking a stop towards Maguri.

I should go, anyways Haneko smiled. Looking at Maguri, she saw he looked

a little disappointed as she walked past. Stopping just behind him, she whispered, so quiet

he probably wouldnt hear anyways It wasnt your fault, Maguri. Its absolutely notyour fault.

Kahime had just stepped out onto one of the balconies for a bit of fresh air, when

she heard voices below. Leaning over the edge and looking down, she saw a friend ofShizumasas grabbing hold of the young blonde from earlier, almost inappropriately.

Narrowing her eyes, she wondered what was going on. Was the older man, who looked

like a woman, harassing the girl? Or were they in one of those sick affairs between older

men and high school girls? She doubted the latter, since Haneko had been a sweet youngwoman, and she had only come about recently.

All night, Kahime had heard whispered gossip about the girl, though. How much

she looked like Haneko, how she was living with two other students her age, how she was

dating one of her roommates. It was getting on Kahimes nerves that the girl received so

much attention. Even Takanari, she had heard, was asking about her. Sighing, Kahimewas about to go down and stop whatever was going on, but saw someone else had already

interrupted the situation.

Seeing Haneko walking back to the crowds, she quickly ran back inside andthrough the rooms, downstairs, looking for the girl. She wanted to get to know such a

talked-about socialite. After spotting Haneko, standing alone in front of the memorial

table that had been set up for the occasion, she made her way over.


30/45

She looks just like you, Kahime commented as she neared Haneko, and the

younger girl spun around. Seeing both the life-sized photo in the frame and this girl in

real life at the same time, she couldve sworn they were the same person.

YesIve heard that all night Haneko sighed, stepping away from thememorial and towards Kahime, I heard she was a Yanki, though

Kahime nodded, I heard that, too. Apparently she was also involved in some

warped up family affairs, both in the Togu family and the Kamiya family.

Haneko looked just beyond Kahimes shoulder as she spoke, seeming nervous, asif she was hoping for someone to show upor not show up. Yeah

A bit distracted, Haneko-chan? Kahime giggled, Looking for someone? A boy,

perhaps?

A man, actually Haneko shrugged, Im trying to avoid some people

A man? Kahime smirked, her finely tuned gossip radars picking up on a juicy

story. Oh dear, are you being harassed by one of the guests?

Well. Haneko sighed, II suppose thats it

Kahime knew there was more than Haine was saying, but she let it go. Well, if

you like, I can ask him to leavewhich guest was this, again?

Ohits not important. Thank you, though, Kahime-sama.

No need to be so formal, Kahime smiled, All great friendships start with a

little bit of leeway. So lets cut the formalities. Its wearisome, anywaysyou shouldknow, since Americans dont use them as much as us.

Haneko nodded, Yeahthats how it is back in the great states of the west.

Haneko, you know Kahime was about to bring up her curiosity about the girl,when suddenly, she noticed Haneko was looking a little pale. A-are you alright? You

look awfulwould you like to go lay down, sweetie?

N-no Haneko shook her head, and Kahime saw her lips tremble slightly, I

need to goIm sorry

Haneko Kahime started to protest, but she saw the girl had already brushed

past her, agile as a cat, and out the front door.

Haine kept jogging until she was safely out of the room and well into the outsidecrowd. Inside, she had been enjoying her conversation with Kahime, when shed seen

Takanari entering through the door on the other end of the roomshed fled.

Sighing, she tapped the shoulder of the nearest person she saw, hoping to ask if

they knew where Mizuko was. As the person turned, though, she saw that it wasMizukos boyfriend, Daichi. Pepping up a little, she smiled at him, Oh! Hi, Daichi-

sama!


31/45

Daichi nodded and turned completely to her, and Haine saw that there was a

young woman clinging to his arm, and she caught the scent of alcohol on the girls

breath. Hello, Haneko-san. Pleasure to see you here.

Oh, soyoure the much talked about doppelganger of Haine Otomiya! The girlgrinned, her blunt bangs somewhat covering her bright green eyes, her skin-tight black

dress falling about halfway down her thighs, with no straps and no back. It looked readyto fall off at any moment.

Thats me, Haine giggled. But she was a little confusedDaichi was datingMizuko. So who was this tipsy tart hanging off his arm? Who might you be?

Oh, Im Azura! the girl smiled, her cat-like eyes glimmering as she looked up at

Daichi, Daichi-samas fiance.

F-fiance?! Haine repeated, her jaw dropping as she looked up at Daichi, thenback at Azura. She was quite pretty, in a much more catty and seductive way than

Mizuko, but Daichi being engagedall the while dating Mizuko? What was wrong with

him? That was cruel

Haneko Daichi started to say, but Haine held up a hand to stop him.

Sorry, gotta go She said quickly, seeing Mizuko across the lawn. Wavinggoodbye to Azura and Daichi, she picked her way through the people until she reached

Mizuko. Mizuko was talking to a younger girl, a year or two younger than her, but she

shooed her off when she saw Haine.

Haneko! Hey, whats up?

Well Haine sighed, I think we should leave earlygo home and watch amovie or somethingthis is boring.

Mizuko raised her eyebrows, but nodded. Okaysure. Ill just go say goodbye

to Daichi firstokay?

About that Haine took a deep breath, Hes engaged, MizukoIm sorry tobe the one to tell you, but

Much to her surprise, however, Mizuko started laughing. Haine did a double take,

but said nothing, waiting for her explanation. After Mizuko had stopped the fit of giggles,

she shook her head and put an arm around Haines shoulders. Youre sweet, Hanekoand thank you. Most people dont mention it around me, as if Im going to throw a fit or

somethingbut Im aware of Daichis engagement. And he knows I know

Then why? Haine didnt understand why Mizuko would get involved with a

promised manI love him, Mizuko shrugged, as if it was that simple. When you love

someone, you make a sacrifice for themmy sacrifice is knowing that we can never truly

be together. But for every day until his twenty-first birthday, he is mine, and I am his

thats the most I can ask for.

You meanit was an arranged marriage?


32/45

Yes Mizuko smiled sadly, Its been there since he was born. It was there

when we met, when we fell in love, when we began datingits always been a hot pot of

wax balanced over our relationship. We cant do anything unholy because of it, we cantbe together past a certain extent at public events, and Daichi has to hang out with Azura-

sama at most events like this

Haine watched Mizuko sadly, feeling pity for such a lifestylebut alsounderstanding. Shed been prepared to make a sacrifice to be with Takanariif shehadnt been able to save him from the Togus oppression, she wouldve sacrificed a

normal marriage and life to be with himbecause that was what she wanted the most.

Shed made many sacrifices along the wayand she would continue to make them, forTakanari. So she understood Mizukos deep feelings for Daichi. It actually relieved her to

know that she wasnt the only one who had it hard in the love departmentalthough, her

current situation was a lot more difficult than Mizukos

Go say goodbye to DaichiIll just wait here, okay? Haine smiled at Mizuko,who smiled back, before turning to go off and see Daichi and his fiance.

Chapter 9:

After Mizuko rushed off in Daichis direction, Haine looked around, observing

the people around her. She wasnt much of a socialite, so she didnt know what to do

when left alone in a crowd. She glanced at Mizuko, who was gushing over Daichi whileAzura preoccupied herself chatting with some other people.

Sighing, Haine sat down at an empty table and watched the people mingling and

chatting. Nobody laughed to loud or danced along with the musicit was rude to do such

a thing at a service like this. But the light-hearted expressions the others wore told Hainethat they were no

When I Am Gone, Will You Continue Living?

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