Travelling Jokes - ‘Just for Fun’

Father’s PhilosophyA young man comes home and says “Dad, just got my driver’s license and would like to use the family car.”Father replies, :”O.K., son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard is neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then we’ll see.”Well, several months pass and the young man comes into the house with his report card in his hand. “Dad, I got great marks on my report card. I’ve been keeping my room as neat as a pin, and the yard is always ship-shape. How about letting me use the car?”Father replies, “That’s all true, but son you didn’t cut your hair.”Son says, “But, dad, Jesus had long hair.”Father replies, “Yes, son, you’re perfectly right. And he walked everywhere he went.”

Thanks for FlyingAn airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy, which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, give a smile, and a “Thanks for flying XYZ airline.” He said that in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment, but no one seemed annoyed.Finally everyone had gotten off except for one little old lady walking with a cane. She approached and asked, conspiratorially, “Sonny, mind if I ask you a question?”“Why no Ma’am, what is it?”“Did we land or were we shot down?”

Trains and PlanesA large two engined train was crossing America. After they had gone some distance one of the engines broke down. “No problem,” the engineer thought, and carried on at half power.Farther on down the line, the second engine broke down, and the train slowed to a dead stop. The engineer decided he should inform the passengers about why the train had stopped, and made the following announcement:“Ladies and gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that both engines have failed, and we will be stuck here for some time. The good news is that you decided to take the train and not fly.”

One LinerI wanna hang a map of the world in my house. Then I'm gonna put pins into all the locations that I've traveled to. But first, I'm gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won't fall down.

One LinerWe are all time travelers moving at the speed of exactly 60 minutes per hour.