Transactional analysis

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Successful Professional Salespeople . . . Are psychologists first, being students of ‘people’, sensitive to feelings and emotions, not anxious to rush into a presentation until they know the kind of person they are dealing with. Understand people: Have one thing in common: they’re different, so what appeals to one person may not work with another Do business with people they like, all other things equal Do business with people they like, all other things NOT equal (Lee Iacocca) Must buy you before they will buy your product Are excellent communicators

Transcript of Transactional analysis

Page 1: Transactional analysis

Successful Professional Salespeople . . .

Are psychologists first, being students of ‘people’, sensitive to feelings and emotions, not anxious to rush into a presentation until they know the kind of person they are dealing with.

Understand people: Have one thing in common: they’re different, so what appeals to

one person may not work with another Do business with people they like, all other things equal Do business with people they like, all other things NOT equal

(Lee Iacocca) Must buy you before they will buy your product

Are excellent communicators

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Psychological and Sociological Theories of Human Attitudes and Behavior

Transactional Analysis

Social Styles

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What Does That Mean?

This morning, John said to Mary, “Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?” Explain what John meant likely depended on how he asked the question.

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Honey, Have You Seen My Car Keys?

Harry and Wilma are husband and wife. One morning, Harry is running late for work and can’t find his car keys. When he asks for Wilma’s assistance in finding them, they eventually get into an argument. Who’s fault was it?

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Don’t Grump At Me One summer evening recently, a lady walks into

a restaurant of a well-known national chain. She places an order after waiting in line for another lady friend and four kids who are with her. After receiving her food, she discovers she did not get everything she ordered. She returns to the counter and complains, “First, I have to wait and wait to place my order. Then, you mess it up on top of that.” Robbie, who had taken her order makes a mistake in responding to the complaint. What did Robbie do? What should Robbie have done?

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There’s A ‘Good’ Farmer

Luke’s father would often take the family for a drive around the countryside after supper on Sunday. His father liked to look at other farms. Luke’s father would sometimes say, “He’s a good farmer” when driving by a farm. What was the basis for his father’s conclusion?

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Well It Worked the Last Time

Charlene had a very successful sales call when she called on Herman. She had ‘tons’ of information and Herman was seemingly interested in every detail, every number, every fact. When she gave the same presentation on her next stop with Paul it backfired. What went wrong and why?

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Transactional Analysis A model for explaining why and how:

People think like they do People act like they do People interact/communicate with others

Based on published ‘psychological’ work such as: Games People Play (Dr. Eric Berne) I’m OK - - You’re OK (Dr. Tom Harris) Born to Win (Dr. Dorothy Jongeward)

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Our Brain (according to Berne)

Determines what we think and how we act Acts like a tape recorder while recording

1) Events2) Associated feelings

Has 3 distinct parts or ego states1) Parent2) Adult3) Child

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Parent Ego State Thoughts, feelings, attitudes, behavioral patterns based

on messages or lessons learned from parents and other ‘parental’ or authoritarian sources

Shoulds and should nots; oughts and ought nots; always and never

Prejudicial views (not based on logic or facts) on things such as:

religion dress salespeopletraditions work productsmoney raising children companies

Nurturing views (sympathetic, caring views) Critical views (fault finding, judgmental, condescending

views)

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Adult Ego State

Thoughts, feelings, attitudes, behavioral patterns based on objective analysis of information (data, facts)

Make decisions based on logic, computations, probabilities, etc. (not emotion)

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Child Ego State

Thoughts, feelings, attitudes, behavioral patterns based on child-like emotions, impulses, feelings we have experienced

Child-like examples

ImpulsiveSelf-centeredAngryFearful

HappyPleasure seekingRebelliousHappy

CuriousEager to please

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Ego Portraits

People have favorite, preferred ego state, depicted by larger circle in a diagramParent Adult Child

P

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C

P

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P

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Human Interaction Analysis A transaction = any interaction or

communication between 2 people People send and receive messages out of and

into their different ego states How people say something (what others hear?)

just as important as what is said Types of communication, interactions

1) Complementary2) Crossed3) Ulterior

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Intonations: It’s the Way You Say It!

Placement of the emphasis

Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?

Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?Why don’t I take you to dinner tonight?

What it means

I was going to take someone else.Instead of the guy you were going with.I’m trying to find a reason why I

shouldn’t take you.

Do you have a problem with me?Instead of going on your own.Instead of lunch tomorrow.Not tomorrow night.

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Complementary ‘Transactions’

Interactions, responses, actions regarded as appropriate and expected from another person.

Parallel communication arrows, communication continues.Example 1: #1 What time do you have?

#2 I’ve got 11:15.P

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Complementary ‘Transactions’ cont’dExample 2:

P

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P

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#1 You’re late again!#2 I’m sorry. It won’t

happen again.

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Crossed ‘Transactions’ Interactions, responses, actions NOT regarded as appropriate or

expected from another person. Crossed communication arrows, communication breakdown.

Example 1 #1 What time do you have?#2 There’s a clock on the wall, why don’t you

figure it out yourself?

P

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C

P

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Crossed ‘Transactions’ cont’d

Example 2 #1 You’re late again!#2 Yeah, I know, I had a flat

tire.

P

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P

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Ulterior ‘Transactions’

Interactions, responses, actions which are different from those explicitly statedExample #1 How about coming up to my room andlistening to some music?

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Some Selling Implications of TA Develop an adaptive selling strategy for ‘parent’,

‘adult’, ‘child’ customers ‘Best’ communication exchange for selling?

Remember to respond in ‘complementary’ manner Most effective selling involves adult to adult

Strokes, or positive interactions, important Verbal (e.g. hello, compliment) Touch (handshake, pat on back) A gift Listening

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Being a ‘Response Able’ Salesperson Recognize you cannot control another’s behavior, but you can

affect their behavior by the way you respond to them. Remember you control your own behavior and thoughts.

1) Keep things in perspective Don’t sweat small stuff Give it test of time Ask if it’s happened before Distinguish what can be changed from what can’t Focus on haves vs. have nots

2) Have realistic expectations Life is not fair or perfect Bad (good) things happen, usually don’t last forever Things don’t always go according to plan People don’t always act as you’d like (remember ego state

explanations, people have ‘bad’ days, etc.)

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Dealing with Difficult Customers Keep ‘adult’ ego state in control of yourself. Don’t get defensive, argumentative, emotional. Don’t take it personally. Move cautiously, stay cool, remember

complementary transactions and strokes. Do not need to take continued abuse. If handled well (e.g. didn’t embarrass customer,

allowed them to take something out on you), can turn out to be positive later.

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Sales Quotes: Transactional Analysis When a relationship is right, details are

negotiable;

When tension is high, details become obstacles.

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Sales Quotes: Transactional Analysis

Rule #1:The customer is never wrong.

Rule #2:If the customer is wrong, read rule #1.