Training By:Training By:

TTONY ONY KKUBICKI, LCSW, M.S.Ed.Psy.UBICKI, LCSW, M.S.Ed.Psy.

Relationship Communication Center, Inc.Relationship Communication Center, Inc.1025 S. Moorland Rd., Suite 4031025 S. Moorland Rd., Suite 403

Milwaukee, WI 53005Milwaukee, WI 53005

262.786.0411262.786.0411

Tony KubickiTony Kubicki is a psychotherapist and Clinical Director of Relationship Communication Center, Inc. Since 1985, he has worked extensively with students and educational staff throughout Southeastern Wisconsin. In his efforts to help people improve their relationships, he has developed “Hitting Always Hurts” a program for elementary school children, the “Relationship Abuse Prevention Program” for high school students, the “Parent Stress Reduction Toolbox” for parents, and “Workplace Relationships that Works” for educators.

In 1999, Tony and his wife, Elaine Kubicki, published, Isolation to Intimacy: A Guide to Get From Hurting to Healing in Relationships. This manual is used in schools, correctional settings, and in private practice with individuals, couples, and families.

For information on available trainings, acquiring a manual,or scheduling a private counseling session, call:

Tony or Elaine KubickiTony or Elaine Kubicki Relationship Communication Center, Inc.Relationship Communication Center, Inc.

1025 S. Moorland Rd., Suite 4031025 S. Moorland Rd., Suite 403Brookfield, WI 53005Brookfield, WI 53005

262.786.0411262.786.0411

““I learned many techniques for dealing with other people.”I learned many techniques for dealing with other people.”Teacher from NorthwestTeacher from Northwest

Comments from Northwest Secondary School staff who, Comments from Northwest Secondary School staff who, after attending “Workplace Relationships That Work” after attending “Workplace Relationships That Work” training have implemented the training’s 10 Tools to training have implemented the training’s 10 Tools to

improve their Workplace Relationships.improve their Workplace Relationships.

(Link)

AABOUT THE BOUT THE SSEMINAREMINARAABOUT THE BOUT THE SSEMINAREMINAR

“I was glad that the training was held before the school year began. I enjoyed getting to know my new co-workers before the year started. I wish we had more time to continue building relationships during the school year.”

“This was extremely helpful for me. I got a lot out of it and still use these strategies and techniques to this day!”

“I liked the moderators presentation style—friendly with a sense of humor. For me, acting out scenarios works. It gives me examples of how I can handle situations as they occur.”

• TFBTFB RRESPONSIBILITYESPONSIBILITY

• FFIRING IRING TTHOUGHTSHOUGHTS

• KKEEP EEP BBREATHING!REATHING!

• HHIRING IRING EENEMIES?NEMIES?

• 98%98% RRULEULE

• OKOK SSWITCHWITCH

• TTAKE ‘EM TO THE AKE ‘EM TO THE ER ER • LLEARNING TO EARNING TO LLISTENISTEN

• PPRESENCE OF RESENCE OF MMINDIND

• CCARE-ARE-FFRONTATIONRONTATION

• TFBTFB RRESPONSIBILITYESPONSIBILITY

• FFIRING IRING TTHOUGHTSHOUGHTS

• KKEEP EEP BBREATHING!REATHING!

• HHIRING IRING EENEMIES?NEMIES?

• 98%98% RRULEULE

• OKOK SSWITCHWITCH

• TTAKE ‘EM TO THE AKE ‘EM TO THE ER ER • LLEARNING TO EARNING TO LLISTENISTEN

• PPRESENCE OF RESENCE OF MMINDIND

• CCARE-ARE-FFRONTATIONRONTATION

Tony KubickiTony Kubicki Relationship Communication Center, Inc. Relationship Communication Center, Inc.

262.786.0411262.786.0411

TFBTFB RRESPONSIBILITYESPONSIBILITY

TTOOLOOL #1 #1

TFBTFB RRESPONSIBILITYESPONSIBILITY

TTOOLOOL #1 #1

“I enjoyed your presentation. It was thought provoking. As a counselor so much of it resounded with me. I try to teach our students that they are responsible for their own behaviors—I will use the TFB illustration to help with this.”

FFIRING IRING TTHOUGHTSHOUGHTS

TTOOL OOL #2#2

FFIRING IRING TTHOUGHTSHOUGHTS

TTOOL OOL #2#2

“I was very stressed and found myself being very controlling of my students. Suddenly, I decided to“Fire My Thoughts” and had a refreshed, non-controlling manner. It made a difference in my instruction and my students’ behavior.”

“I liked the seminar, it helps me think before I react and keep a positive spin in the environment.”

KKEEP EEP BBREATHINGREATHING

TTOOL OOL #3#3

KKEEP EEP BBREATHINGREATHING

TTOOL OOL #3#3

“This is a tool I have used often during the school year. At times when I am under stress because of deadlines that I have to meet, I use this Breathing technique to get more relaxed.”

“I liked when we learned about Breathing techniques and ways to reduce stress.”

KKEEP EEP BBREATHINGREATHING

TTOOL OOL #3#3

KKEEP EEP BBREATHINGREATHING

TTOOL OOL #3#3

“Since I have a terrible habit of speaking from emotion, learning to Breathe has kept me from saying things I later regret. With much practice, I have been able to get to the point where I usually take some time to Breathe before I react to any situation.”

HHIRINGIRING EENEMIESNEMIES

TTOOL OOL #4#4

HHIRINGIRING EENEMIESNEMIES

TTOOL OOL #4#4

“I had a problem with a parent. We disagreed about something. I decided that I wasn’t going to Hire her as an Enemy. I was going to try and work with her which I did. She hired me as an enemy though.”

98%98% RRULEULE

TTOOL OOL #5#5

98%98% RRULEULE

TTOOL OOL #5#5

“I have used this most frequently to let students have an opportunity to vent without taking it personally. I have also used this in everyday relationships to help defuse someone who is feeling attacked.”

98%98% RRULEULE

TTOOL OOL #5#5

98%98% RRULEULE

TTOOL OOL #5#5

“Someone gasped in shock under their breath when they discovered I didn’t know something they assumed I should know. I simply didn’t let it bother me, because I decided this person has other issues to worry about.”

OKOK SSWITCHWITCH

TTOOL OOL #6#6

OKOK SSWITCHWITCH

TTOOL OOL #6#6

“When a conflict arose, I didn’t pay any attention to it. I just kept records and let it roll off my back. I stayed at peace with myself even when I felt things were not being done fairly.”

TTAKE’ EM TO THE AKE’ EM TO THE ERERTTOOL OOL #7#7

TTAKE’ EM TO THE AKE’ EM TO THE ERERTTOOL OOL #7#7

ER= Emotional Reversal

“Instead of trying to put ‘difficult people’ in their place, I attempt to put myself in their place. I keep trying to implement ER!”

TTAKE’ EM TO THE AKE’ EM TO THE ERERTTOOL OOL #7#7

TTAKE’ EM TO THE AKE’ EM TO THE ERERTTOOL OOL #7#7

“I received a Feedback report done on one of my class blocks. Some of the comments were good and some were not so good. Although I know I can always improve, some of the not so good comments I know were exaggerated somewhat. I was going to give the individual observer a piece of my mind, but I Took Them to the ER and I didn’t Hire them. It’s great!”

LLEARNING TO EARNING TO LLISTENISTEN

TTOOL OOL #8#8

LLEARNING TO EARNING TO LLISTENISTEN

TTOOL OOL #8#8

“I spent more time Listening this school year. I tried to hear where the other person (staff) was coming from; to see if we are on the same page; to ask for clarification if needed. This has helped my interactions/communication with individuals that I work closely with. We are much more unified.”

LLEARNING TO EARNING TO LLISTENISTEN

TTOOL OOL #8#8

LLEARNING TO EARNING TO LLISTENISTEN

TTOOL OOL #8#8

“I used the Learning to Listen tool and it was very helpful and beneficial towards improving my relationships. I used this many times and it really helped to open up communication between us.”

PPRESENCE OF RESENCE OF MMINDINDTTOOL OOL #9#9

PPRESENCE OF RESENCE OF MMINDINDTTOOL OOL #9#9

“I have gotten into the habit of trying to predict future behavior of chronically disruptive students. Instead, I keep the slate clean and let them know at the beginning of class that ‘I hope they do well today.’ Sometimes students come with this attitude as well.”

PPRESENCE OF RESENCE OF MMINDINDTTOOL OOL #9#9

PPRESENCE OF RESENCE OF MMINDINDTTOOL OOL #9#9

“Making sure that I have my personal emotions in check is the key for me. Because the kids come to school with tons of bottled-up emotions and are ready to explode on anyone that they may come in contact with. I have to be Presence to my own need to keep my feelings in check so I can be ready to help control theirs and prevent a battle zone.”

CCAREARE--FFRONTATION RONTATION TTOOL OOL #10#10

CCAREARE--FFRONTATION RONTATION TTOOL OOL #10#10

“I always let my students know that we are in this together. It’s our classroom and our learning environment. It makes them feel like we are a team. I also always use ‘How can I help?’ daily because it’s important for the students to know that I am there to help.”

CCAREARE--FFRONTATION &RONTATION &OK SwitchOK Switch

TTOOL OOL #6 and #10#6 and #10

CCAREARE--FFRONTATION &RONTATION &OK SwitchOK Switch

TTOOL OOL #6 and #10#6 and #10

“In my most difficult class, I have a student who is prone to vulgar outbursts. Generally, they are not directed towards me. This one day in particular, she became upset with me because I could not help her immediately. She began her outburst. I used my OK Switch to know that what she was saying was not about me, but just her own frustration. Later the next day, I used Care-Frontation to talk with her about the situation. We decided together that we were in this together and there had to be a better way.”