7 STEPSTO

MANIFESTING

YOUR HEART’S DESIRES

CYNTHIA OCCELLI

7 STEPS TO MANIFESTINGYOUR HEART'S DESIRES

7 STEPS TOMANIFESTINGYOUR HEART'S

DESIRES

CYNTHIA OCCELLI

Mood Pop, Inc.Los Angeles

@ 2013 by Cynthia OccelliAll rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced orotherwise copied for public or private use–other than “fair use” asbrief quotations embodied in articles and reviews–without priorwritten permission of the author.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribethe use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical,emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician,either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only tooffer information of a general nature to help you in your quest foremotional and spiritual well-being.

This book was produced using PressBooks.com, and PDF renderingwas done by PrinceXML.

Contents

viAlso by Cynthia:Preface

viiWho am I to write this book?Universal Conspiracy

1A Word on Co-creation & The Law of AttractionAltitude

3The Forest before the TreesSpace

4Step OneDream

8Step TwoCommit

14Step ThreePlan

17Step FourRRPs

23Step FiveAction

26Step SixPersevere

32Step Seven

iv

35Afterword36Connect with Cynthia37About Cynthia

v

Also by Cynthia:

BoBooksoks

Resurrecting Venus: Embrace Your Feminine Power

Inspired Living

AAudio Guided Meditationsudio Guided Meditations

Guided Meditation for Beginners

Guided Meditation for Self Worth

Guided Meditation for Prosperity

Embrace Your Feminine Spirit Guided Meditation

Connect with Your Inner Goddess Guided Meditation

vi 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

vi

Preface

Who am I to write this book?

I am humbled and honored to share this little book of bigthings with you. These pages contain the “secrets” to mysuccess. Once you know them, you’ll see that much of themagic of manifesting what you really want is clear, actionableand under your direct control. Rather than a secret, you’lldiscover that having the deepest desires of your heart is thepredictable result of cultivating a fertile inner environmentand taking consistent, intelligent and inspired action. Thisshould bring you great reassurance because it means that youhave the power and the ability to manifest your dreams. Allyou need is you.

Before you read further, I have one request: each time youopen this book, say this silently or out loud: “The past is over.My future is mine to create. I am the most powerful person inmy life.” Refrain from mental conversations about whetheryou can do this, or how you’ll take on something that mightscare, or intimidate you. You are here to create BIG dreams,

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but don’t worry, the road will incline gently and life willconspire to help you all along the way. You are not alone. Bemindful of your inner feelings and self-talk. If you feeloverwhelmed or fearful, you are likely dark-futurizing(imagining a negative future development or outcome).Release it and return to the present moment. Be here now.All you must do, for the rest of your life, is handle thismoment. You can do this, you always have. Breathe. Acceptyour worthiness and know that you’re here to live out thegreatest expression of you. We are all cut from the samecloth. Anything is possible for you.

Sharing the 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart’s Desires withyou is incredibly fulfilling for me. It gives extraordinarymeaning to my life. The steps in this book were born fromyears of enduring seemingly insurmountable challenges anddiscovering what actually creates material and meaningfulchange. I’ve learned what works and, just as importantly,what doesn’t work. I’ve lived out everything you will learn inthis book. There is nothing to “wish, want or hope” for here.There are only result driven methods that anyone willing canuse. Years of coaching women who were ready to takeownership and responsibility for their destiny has given mean unshakable understanding of the power within us all. It’stime you consciously claim your role as the most powerfulperson in your life. This has always been true, but claiming itis a vital step in wielding the life-force within you. To bolsteryour confidence and to help you expand your capacity todream, I’m sharing my story with you. I want you to knowthat if someone like me could create the romantic, financial,physical life I’ve always dreamed of living, you can too.

viii 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

I grew up thinking that God made a mistake by creating me.I was a biracial child and my father left before I was born. Mymom was a sixteen year old German immigrant who wasvery much a child herself. My childhood was steeped in racialand social discrimination. The prejudice in my communityand parts of my family was so strong that even I believed itwas the truth. I felt bad for being born, for being black andfor intruding on the lives of others.

The dominant theme of my childhood was insecurity andinadequacy combined with a deep sense of inferiority for notliving up to the image of the ideal modern woman – toughand impenetrable. Blessedly, interspersed throughout thechaos were wisps of love, light, and angels impersonatinganimals and humans. They kept hope alive for me.

Although a gifted student, I dropped out of 9th grade andsurrounded myself with gang members, convicted felons,drug dealers and teen-welfare moms – people who were alsodrowning in their miseries. By the time I was nineteen, I wasliving in a garage on welfare and had just given birth to alittle boy. His father was incarcerated and I was still reelingfrom the ravages of our relationship. I struggled to survive,from welfare check to welfare check, and often couldn’tafford diapers.

My son gave me a life-changing gift: worth. It wasn’t self-worth, I still believed I was wholly defective and undeservingof good. I believed in his worth – he was worthy of thewhole world. He deserved a happy, healthy home and a life ofopportunity. This ignited a flame inside of me.

Preface ix

My life’s transformation began with fantasies. Surrounded bynaysayers and seeming impossibility, I began to dream. Toescape the pain of my reality, I’d fantasize visions of my sonand me living in Los Angeles, me getting an education,having a beautiful home, marrying a man who really loved usand being able to give my son everything I’d never had.

Fast forward five years, my world had completelytransformed. I was living in Los Angeles, attending lawschool, running a business and falling in love. I’d begun torecognize my power and inherent self-worth. I married awonderful man in a fairy tale wedding in the South ofFrance. We built our dream home in Bel Air, had a childtogether and I graduated from law school (in the top 3% ofmy class), never having finished high school or having anundergraduate degree. I took up acting and modeling andtraveled the world. Not a single vestige of my life as a welfaremom living in a garage remained.

At that time, I felt that I’d achieved my life’s greatest triumph.I’d done what everyone said was impossible – I’d gone frompoverty and despair to success and happiness – and it seemedlike the rest of my life would be one long ride into the sunset.

Life had a different plan, another lesson, another challenge, anevent powerful enough to shake loose every sense ofconfidence, security, and peace I’d worked so hard todevelop. One beautiful afternoon, my husband and I enjoyeda leisurely lunch. That evening, I slid his wedding ring off ofhis finger, as nurses prepared him for an emergency surgery.He’d suffered a devastating brain hemorrhage. It washedaway his personality and our memories. After severalsurgeries, he finally regained consciousness. It slowly became

x 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

apparent that our life together had been erased from his mindand much of it would never return. Our marriage was over.It was soul-ripping.

The following three years would be the most harrowing ofmy life. People I loved abandoned me; the family I’d adoptedas my own fell to infighting over money and fear. I learnedwhat it felt like to want to die. My heart was broken wideopen. I was devastated and pissed off at life. Old wounds ofunworthiness bled fresh and in the twisted thinking ofemotional turmoil, I concluded that my husband’s devastatingloss was confirmation that I was in fact a mistake and Godwanted to make sure I knew that I was a lesser child.

I was a single mom again. This time I had a huge mortgage,unattended businesses, neglected investments, gruelinglawsuits and a hole as big as the ocean in my heart. Life onwelfare in the garage became a longed for memory. On mostdays, I got out of bed solely because of my children.

Those long dismal days sent me on a journey. I wanted tounderstand why I existed. What was the point? Was thereany meaning to my life? A purpose? If so, what was it? Iwanted to know God personally, so I could ask for myselfinstead of having another human cite scripture or predictfutures that never came to pass. I studied several religions andimmersed myself in spiritual teachings without regard for therules and righteousness of any of them. I meditated,journaled, turned within and found a place of quiet. If I’veever had anything close to an epiphany, it happened when Irealized that I was the creator, maintainer and life-source ofmy beliefs and they’d shaped my entire life. Nothing “outthere” could be against me until I joined in agreement with

Preface xi

it. After years of searching for the truth, I found myself. Itwas a powerful enlightenment and it set me free. God wasn’tdoing anything to me. (S)He was doing what (S)He hadalways done: be a force of infinite, unconditional, all-encompassing love and beauty. God was changeless and thatwasn’t going to change because of me.

The fires of those years were purposeful. They burned awayeverything superfluous and left me free of limitation. Fromthe fertile soils of charred earth, I planted the seeds of my newlife. I knew exactly what I was here for: to live out mydeepest desires and show others the way to freedom withouthaving to endure their own ravaging fire. I am here to livemy greatest expression and walk beside you, helping youclear the path to yours.

I am living my dreams. Today, my son attends one of thefinest universities in the world; my daughter is the fifteen-year-old we all should have been – free, inspired, loved andconscious of her inherent worth. I live in my dream home –the same house I built – in Bel Air. I am surrounded bypeople who actively love me. My life is harmonious. Irecognize myself as a beautiful person who leaves most peoplebetter off for knowing me. I was created on purpose. I belongand I am safe. My focus now is to connect others, primarilywomen, with two truths I know for sure: 1) You are the mostpowerful person in your life; 2) You are hardwired to bedrawn to and have your heart’s deepest desires.

I’ve lived my whole life preparing to share this with you. It ismy pleasure, honor and purpose. Thank you for finding me.

xii 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Universal ConspiracyA Word on Co-creation & The Law of

Attraction

Most of this book speaks to your part in creating your heart’sdesires. It’s important to note that you are a partner in all youcreate. You are not alone and you won’t be creating yourdesires by yourself. There is an energetic system ofconfirmation and support in everything and it will aid you inmagnetizing or creating your true desires.

You can call it whatever you like or nothing at all.

Many people are familiar with these ideas and call them thelaw of attraction, law of correspondence, or just likeattracting like.

Confusion arises when we think that we don’t have to doanything or contribute to the manifestation of our dreams,but think about it, if we had no part to play, it wouldn’t be aco-creation.

There is no cosmic vending machine, you are the mostpowerful person in your life and you have an active role totake if you want to live your dreams.

I liken it to gardening. Gardening requires much work onthe part of the gardener.

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You must choose the right spot for your plants, so they havethe right amount of light, you must till the soil, plant theseeds, water them, feed them, weed around them, and makesure no parasites destroy them. Yet, you aren’t the energeticsource of the seed’s growth and without that energetic sourceyou couldn’t have a plant, but without your work yourgarden wouldn’t exist. It’s a true co-creation.

2 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

AltitudeThe Forest before the Trees

Below are the 7 Steps to Manifesting the Deepest Desires ofyour heart. Please refer to each section for a detaileddiscussion. Sometimes it helps to see all the steps in one place,so that you’re less inclined to wander in your thinking. Toget the most out of each section, it is vital that you immerseyourself in the action steps, exercises and practices that comein each section. Taking action is the difference between ideasand results. No matter how tempted you are to think themout and move on, don’t! Use focus and self discipline to makesure you follow through. This is your life and the choices youmake when using this book will dictate the outcome. Give ityour all.

1) Space.

2) Dream.

3) Commit.

4) Plan.

5) RRPs.

6) Action.

7) Persevere.

3

SpaceStep One

The first step in creating your dreams is to clear away whatno longer serves you, takes up space and/or could block yourcreative efforts. It’s also vital to reflect and take inventory ofthe last year of your life. Imagine planting the seeds of yourdreams among a crowd of weeds and plants that producesomething other than what you’ve chosen for your life. Yourdreams would have to fight to receive the sunlight, water andnutrients required to grow. If they managed to grow throughthe adversity, they’d be smaller and shaped by theirenvironment. This is exactly how most people approach newgoals and changes. They start wherever they are and look forfuture challenges, while paying little attention to what’salready in the way.

Take some time to look back over last year, see it globally,and sort through it. Observe yourself, in a non judgmental,curious way and ask where you’ve helped yourself or others,and where you feel you missed the mark. This is importantinformation and it will help you as you move forward.

Heartwork #1:

Write the answers to the following questions.

1. Were the last 12 months good for you? Why?

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2. What did you do well?

3. What could you have done better?

4. List the things that moved you forward (emotionally,physically, financially, in relationships, self-esteem level).

5. List the things that moved you away from your good.

6. Who enriched your life?

7. What relationships were depleting or harmful?

8. What thought or thoughts played most in your mind?

9. Describe each month of the last year with one word, phraseor sentence.

Heartwork #2:

Study the answers for the hidden gems, the things that madeyou better, stronger, more alive. Note the things that broughtyou down and caused you suffering.

In hindsight, what could you have done differently to supportand help yourself more?

Be kind.

You’ll notice that who you were 12 months ago is not thesame person you were 6 months ago, and who you are nowis also different. This is proof that no matter what you do,you are always changing. Instead of letting this change happenautomatically, by reaction or by default, this work will helpyou consciously choose and influence the direction of yourgrowth. Go slow, dig in and mine your answers for

Space 5

experiences, actions and people who you associate goodfeelings with. When you feel good, you are exponentiallymore powerful. As you move forward, your focus will be toincrease the good feelings in your life and reduce your timespent around situations, environments, activities and peoplewho deplete your energy or leave you feeling weak.

Evaluate any optional projects or activities that aren’tresonating with good feelings. Free up space for new andbetter things by ending those which don’t serve your highestgood. Become an active and conscious observer of whereyour time, thoughts and energy may be leaking out of yourlife–eliminate energy wastes. Tie off any loose strands ofthings you started and want to finish. Throw out all of thethings that held you back, cluttered your thinking, or held youin upset or unforgiveness over the last year.

The truth is it’s all over, the year is gone; it doesn’t existanymore. All that remains is what you keep alive in yourmind. Let all that does not serve you go, now.

Next, let go of all the reasons things might or must turn outbadly for you. There’s nothing true or factual about thosethoughts; they are just vapors and opinions that feel real whenwe focus on them. When you use the past to argue for yourlimitations, you tie both hands behind your back and blindyourself to opportunities that could lead you to your heart’sdesires. Release and let go.

For support read the chapters: “Surrender Victimhood” and“Forgiveness is Freedom,” in “Resurrecting Venus.”

Gather the wisdom and the joyful memories of the last year.Ultimately, your goal is to take only the good stuff with you.

6 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Let only the treasures remain. Love and give thanks for all thegood, all of the lessons learned. The past does not define thefuture and you have everything you need to become your bestself and create the deepest desires of your heart.

Make your physical world receptive to the dreams you’ll becreating by cleaning and clearing out your physical space too.Do a little at a time. Get rid of all you no longer use, want orneed. Let someone else benefit from it. As you clean and clear,remind yourself that your outer actions reflect your innerwork. The more space you make, the more good can comeyour way.

Note: If you have a habit of thinking pessimistic thoughts,you may catch yourself immersed in old thoughts that you’vedecided to release. Be gentle and patient with yourself. Whenyou become aware of your mind reliving or rehashingsomething that is not on the treasure list, kindly remindyourself that you’ve decided to let it go, and then ask: “Whatdo I really want?” Shift your focus and follow the answer toyour bliss. Habits are thoughts repeated over and over again.Give yourself time to make new ones. You are not your habitsand your habits are not prescient, but they are self-fulfilling,so learn to observe and instill new and empowering thoughthabits.

At the end of this process you will be freer, wiser, infusedwith fresh energy and a clearer perspective. This is the idealfoundation for conscious creation of your heart’s desires.

Space 7

DreamStep Two

In the last step you created fertile, nurturing soils, and thespace to plant the seeds of your deepest desires. Now it’s timeto dream! Give yourself permission to dream fearlessly andwithout judgment. Affirm that you are worthy of living a lifethat feels good and makes you happy. Nothing is too good foryou and the limit of what is possible for you is YOU. DreamBIG.

In “Resurrecting Venus,” I wrote extensively about processesthat have helped me clarify and focus my dreams. Here areselections from Chapter 44, “Conceive Your Dream,” Pleaserefer to that chapter now, before continuing.

If you’ve read Chapter 44 of “Resurrecting Venus” you nowunderstand the power and energy of a well crafted visionboard. It bears noting that sometimes you may put somethingon the board that doesn’t match up to what you’ll later choosein life. That’s perfectly okay. We are ever-changing beings.

If you struggle to find something that resonates with yourcenter, set a full month aside with regular dream explorationsessions. Get quiet, meditate (the “Embrace Your FemininePower Guided Meditation” is perfect for this), trace the pathback to your earliest memories. What made your child self feeljoyful, free and happy to be alive? The answer is nearly alwaysrelated to dreams that would bring you great fulfillment and

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joy today. Patiently explore and write down what youdiscover. Your deepest dreams may elude you if you’redesperately grasping at them. Stillness, relaxation and peaceopen the channels to your inner-world. Cultivate quiet.

Heartwork #1

For a moment, release your dreams, desires and troubles. Letgo of all the things you think you need to be happy. If you gotthe job, car, deal, or won the lottery, but had to live in Siberiato have it, chances are good that you wouldn’t be happy. It’snot the “stuff” that will bring you joy. Thank your way toheaven on earth by appreciating the abundance all aroundyou. Start with the trillions of cells working hard to serve youright now. Be grateful for your mind and every single abilityyou have. Give thanks for the surplus of air, light, water andplants in the world. Give thanks for everyone who has everloved you and send loving thoughts to all those you love.Leave the details, stories, and challenges behind. Count onlythe good. From this peaceful state of gratitude, ask your heartto tell you what you really desire.

Heartwork #2

When you feel as though you’ve caught the vision of whatyou want to manifest, take a moment to test the seeds. Saveyourself the disappointing experience of cultivating what youthought you wanted and then realizing that deep down it’snot at all what your true self wanted. As I mentioned inResurrecting Venus, sometimes our dreams belong to others.They can also belong to our egos. The ego’s dreams will notbring lasting satisfaction. They are the dreams that consume

Dream 9

us as we pursue them, and even if we do attain them, we feelunfulfilled, unsatisfied and yearning for meaning.

Try this simple test to determine whether your dream is reallyyour heart’s desire. Ask:

Would you still want your dream if no one else ever saw orknew about it?

Or, in the case of work or an experience that involves others,would you still want to do it, if you received no money for it?*

*By no means am I saying that money isn’t important, but ifmoney is the sole reason you want to do something, it’s notyour heart’s desire. Your heart needs joy. The most viable,enduring, and rewarding creations are those that spring fromour hearts.

If you’ve read this section and done your Heartwork, chancesare high that you’ve identified your heart’s deepest desires. Ifyou’re still not sure of what you want or whether it’s right foryou, go back to the beginning of this section, read it throughand give yourself the time and space to discover the wisdomwithin you. Whenever you conceive a new dream, create adetailed mental movie of you having just what you want.Make it vivid and sensory. Fill it with the colors, sounds, scentsand words that you want to hear. The act of creating a visionprimes your mind to unconsciously gather all information andopportunities in your environment that could lead you to yourdreams. You notice and create more of whatever you focus on.

I’m an only child and I spent a lot of time alone growingup. This turned out to have some real benefits. As a result ofspending so much time alone, I developed a rich and powerful

10 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

imagination. As a young mom, I’d lie in bed staring at thegarage’s splintered ceiling and imagine myself living in abeautiful home in my favorite city, Los Angeles. We even hada swimming pool. I imagined my son going to a great school,and me getting an education, and becoming financially self-reliant. In my fantasies I felt beautiful and was surrounded bypeople who genuinely liked me. I was in love with a kind andcaring man. My son and I were safe and all was well. I oftenfell asleep this way and I’d escape to these fantasies when mydays were exceptionally challenging.

At that time, I had no idea of the power I was wielding. Thoseintense imaginings laid a foundation for change. I started tobehave more like the me in my day dreams and my attentionwas taken off of all of the things I didn’t want or like, andinstead focused on what I wanted. The act of thinking ofmyself feeling wonderful gave me more energy and openedmy mind up to broader, more perceptive thoughts.

I began to see opportunity where I couldn’t before. I alsobegan to recognize the places I hadn’t shown up for myselfin the past and all the ways I’d undervalued myself and givenmy power away. Slowly, I started to realize that the past didnot have to dictate my future. This triggered a shift in myexpectations; I started to believe that the life I wanted existedin my future, even though nothing around me had changed. Ifelt hopeful and eager.

Set your mind on the trail of your heart’s desires and likea blood hound it will pick up and follow the scent. Makea practice of dreaming. Develop a picture and a sensoryexperience of your best self living the life of your deepestdesires. Each day, feed your vision with your imagination

Dream 11

and energy. Let your vision be what you fall asleep withand return to it first thing in the morning. This powerfulprocess marshals energy and points it in a unified direction.This intense, hyper-focused power is the thread with whichwe weave our dreams.

A Caveat:

Now that you’ve identified your heart’s desire and plantedthe seeds, it’s time to keep it a secret. There will never be ashortage of people to argue for your limitations. They aren’ttelling you your story, they are telling you theirs. If you agreewith them, it becomes your story too. Only share your dreamsand vision board with people who have the expertise to helpyou in creating your vision, or who genuinely want to see yousucceed. This is always a smart strategy, but especially in thebeginning, when dreams are new, it’s vital that you protectand nurture them until they become viable creations.

When making and using your board, be choosy about whosees it before your dreams come to fruition. Dreams are likeembryos, they need constant nourishment and protection, ifthey are going to be born and survive. I rarely share myboard or dreams with anyone outside of my closest confidants,who I know will not judge or criticize them. Let the energyof creation build and accumulate around your heart’s desires.When you share your dreams for no reason other than toinclude someone else, you run the risk of diluting vital energy,or even cutting off the flow. If they share their fears, doubts,and limiting beliefs with you, they may inadvertently derailyour confidence. That said, I have found it beneficial to sharemy vision with one absolutely committed fan. This person canbe anyone, so long as they are fiercely supportive of you and

12 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

willing to hold the space for your highest good. I share mydreams with one person who has an unshakable belief in meand desires my success. I do this because I know that I willnot always feel strong and confident. If I get discouraged ormy vision weakens, this person is still holding my vision andsupporting me. Everything we create exists first in the mind. Iwant my dreams to always be alive in at least one mind otherthan mine.

Dream 13

CommitStep Three

The third step in creating your dreams is: to fully committo doing whatever it takes to achieve them, as long as youharm no one, including yourself. This total commitment isabsolutely necessary and if you aren’t willing to make it,success may elude you.

W. H. Murray expressed this idea so beautifully when he said:

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to drawback – concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there isone elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countlessideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitelycommits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts ofthings occur to help one that would never otherwise haveoccurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision,raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents andmeetings and material assistance, which no man could havedreamed would have come his way.”

Life will conspire to help you when you make a realcommitment to your dream. Your commitment sends a signalto the Universe, saying “I am here, and I am willing to facemy fears, and step all the way out of my comfort zone to domy part in this co-creation.”

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The challenge that comes up when we make this commitmentis we come face to face with our fears.

For example, your dream may be to have a business and you’reconfident in your skills, services or products – you know thatanyone who buys from you will be enriched, but you’re afraidof selling, or asking investors for money to start-up or grow.

Unless and until you overcome this fear, it will hold you back.Affirm to yourself and to Creation that you are willing andable to do whatever it takes to create what you want, andall you have to do – all you can ever do – is handle thismoment. You can handle this particular moment, this step onthe path. Place your focus here, take the one step in front ofyou and then handle the next moment. Keep your focus on thecurrent step and moment, instead of futurizing an experienceof fear. In my personal experiences and my work as a coachI’ve learned that the nightmare scenarios we create when wefuturize are far more frightful than living through the actualexperience of what we’re imagining. How many times haveyou imagined how terrible something was going to be, andthen afterward remarked: “oh, it wasn’t as bad as I thought”?It could have been even better if you’d used your energypositively, instead of investing in dread.

One of the most effective ways to eliminate a fear is to do thething you fear you cannot. Get started. Be kind and gentlewith yourself. Take small bites. If your goal is to teach andshare your knowledge and wisdom with thousands of people,and you’re afraid of public speaking, start with a small casualgroup, give a joint talk, sit on a panel, then take the next step,all the while being willing to grow and step further outside of

Commit 15

your comfort zone. Remember you must be open and willingto do whatever it takes.

Let it be okay if you don’t have all the answers. It’s okay to say:I don’t know, but I’ll find out. It’s okay to make mistakes. It’sokay to be wrong. People appreciate someone who can acceptwhen they’re wrong, or have made a mistake, appreciate thecorrection, and keep going. These are the people we cometo trust. Innately we know that no one is perfect, yet wesomehow expect perfection from ourselves.

Heartwork #1

Imagine yourself doing something that will help youmagnetize your dream, but scares or intimidates you. Flip yourperspective and see yourself thriving and doing well. Createa clear experience of the people involved really seeing yourauthenticity, potential and value.

We’ve reached the point where the linear, step-by-stepapproach we’ve followed thus far gives way to the wild divineand the first of several paradoxes emerge. Don’t resist thecontradictions or attempt to fit them into a logical format.Remember your agreement to suspend doubt and judgment?If you accept these paradoxes as the natural and normal resultof co-creating with a friendly Universe, you’ll do just fine.

Paradox #1: Once you make a genuine, nothing held backcommitment to do whatever it takes to create your dreams,you will find that your dreams work hard to come to you. Youwon’t have to actually do all of whatever it takes, but there’sno fooling the Universe or yourself; you’ve got to go all in.

16 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

PlanStep Four

The fourth step in creating your heart’s desires is to developa plan with actionable steps. Having a plan helps us to getwhere we’re going. It’s our map and will help us identify whatactions are most related to our goals and what isn’t important.It also helps us to stay on track.

Plans can be simple or complex, anything from a page tofifty pages. Unless you’re writing a business plan to submit topotential investors (in which case I strongly advise you to hirea professional), get creative and use whatever mediums andformats work to bring you greater clarity and connection toyour dreams.

Start with a mission or purpose statement to create theenvironment and container for your dream. A missionstatement is commonly a statement that articulates the mainaims and intentions of a business.

For example, ASG Real Estate, a Los Angeles Broker whofocuses on helping families and investors navigate thequagmire of foreclosures, short-sales, and other distressedproperties has a very short and simple mission statement: “Tobe unusually helpful.”

By contrast, Whole Foods Inc’s mission statement is muchlonger and more detailed:

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“We believe that companies, like individuals, must assume theirshare of responsibility as tenants of Planet Earth.

We actively support organic farming, the best method for promotingsustainable agriculture and protecting farm workers and theenvironment. We also aim to protect the environment by supportingalternative sources of energy and by recycling or composting ourwaste. We are actively involved in our communities by supportingfood banks, sponsoring neighborhood events, and contributing atleast 5% of total net profits to not-for-profit organizations.

Our vision of a sustainable future means our children andgrandchildren will be living in a world that values human creativity,diversity, and individual choice.

Our whole business is about making a difference – in the livesof our Team Members and the customers we serve, and in thecommunities and environments in which we operate.”(http://www.wholefoodsmarket.com/careers/our-mission-and-culture)

The power of a mission statement is well understood. Onceyou have one that reflects your deepest intentions and desires,you’ll have a powerful mechanism for evaluating whethera contemplated action supports your ultimate vision. If itdoesn’t, you’ll know what not to do — which is as valuableas knowing what to do. Here are some examples of personalmission statements:

“To create a life of ease and balance while pursuing my passion forcreative expression.”

18 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

“To live a life of love and beauty and share it with the world bycreating beautiful things.”

“I am a leader in my family, business, and community. I use mygifts of intelligence and compassion to motivate myself and others toreach their greatest potential.”

“I am a citizen of the world. I create productions and services thatspread laughter around the world.”

Mission statements don’t have to be for your whole lifetime.Aim for five years.

Though your mission may affect or involve others, keep itgeneral. Mission statements that involve a specific individualare really goals that require a reaction or response from anindividual to be successful. This is overstepping your power(except in the case of young children). Make you and your lifethe focus of your mission statement.

Keep it simple. You don’t need to spell out every aspect ofyour mission, although you can. Keep in mind that simple iseasy to remember and you don’t have to call every detail oraspect of your intention out. Embodying a positive missionstatement will improve all areas of your life. Rising tides lift allboats.

The right mission statement will cause a change in yourinternal state. It will make you feel something positive in yourbody (inspiration, excitement, knowing, confidence). Yourbody is wiser than we comprehend; it always knows the rightpath.

Action 19

Remember to keep your mission statement to yourself, atleast at first. Mission statements start out as tender seedlingsthat require your nurturing and protection. Let your missionstatement take root and gain strength before you share it withothers.

My mission statement:

“To meaningfully and materially improve lives, includingmine, by using every wondrous and soul-ripping experienceI’ve had to create good.”

This statement rescues me on emotionally stormy days andmakes every article, radio show, conversation, and emailtremendously important to me. In every moment, I am clearabout my objective and consequently I don’t get lost intempting, but off target tangents.

Heartwork #1

Craft your mission statement. Let it take form organically. Itwill change several times before you hit on the one most truefor you. Once you have a statement that resonates with you,write it on a card and tuck it into your wallet. Wheneveryou’re waiting in line, are bored, or have a few minutesbetween activities, pull out the card and reflect on yourmission. It will change you and your life. Let it be yourguiding light.

Next, create a plan of action. Do this even if you have no ideahow to get where you want to go.

Heartwork #2

20 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Imagine yourself at the place of your big dreams manifested,now look backward in time and ask: “How did I get here?”Trace the path from your realized desire to you in the presentmoment. What transpired between there and here? Write itdown, no matter how silly or unrealistic it seems. Then askthe question again. Document every answer and idea. Thisexercise always reveals new and valuable actions.

Heartwork #3

Find a mentor. Look out into the world for examples of peoplewho are living your dreams and study how they got there.You don’t have to do everything they did and you’ll do thingsin a way that’s unique to you, but this information can be veryuseful. Most people are willing to share their insights if youask them. It’s flattering and most people really do enjoy givingback; reach out to them.

Heartwork #4

Hire a coach or find a positive and motivated friend and setup a mini-mastermind group. Once a week, get together orhave a call, and take turns sharing what you’re working on,brainstorm action steps, and report your progress over the lastweek. (I do this weekly with my friend and book writingcoach Robin Colucci. It’s powerful.)

Paradox #2 – Work hard to craft a plan of clear action steps –and at the same time – don’t be worried about what you don’tknow, and don’t get attached to your plan, because thingsnearly always take a different route than you plan.

I’ve spent a great deal of time with people who take planningso seriously, that when they can’t see how something will

Action 21

work out from the very beginning, they call the objectiveimpossible and let it go. This shuts nearly every dream down.Show up, do your best and let the Universe (God, Spirit,Light) take care of the rest.

For example, I had an entire plan around becoming an authorand not one thing went as planned, yet here I am, and the wayit unfolded is better than anything I’d planned.

I was a blogger, and through blogging I learned that I reallylove writing; and it allowed me to achieve my life’s missionwithout needing anyone else to choose me. From there Idecided that I would build an online social media presence, soI would have an audience for the books I wanted to write. I’dplanned a two pronged approach, I would send query lettersto literary agents and follow the traditional publishing route(author gets agent then agent sells book to publisher) and,simultaneously, I would grow my online community, so Icould self-publish my books. As I was focusing on buildingmy online presence through blogging, Tony Berkman(genius, sweetheart and owner of blog catalog) put my blogon the front page of his site.

I was thrilled because it really advanced the second prong ofmy approach, it built my online presence which would reallyhelp me to self-publish. Yet, what resulted was completelyunplanned. A publisher saw my blog, contacted me directly,and published “Resurrecting Venus”! To this day I still don’thave a literary agent. Nothing went as planned at all. Buthaving the plan caused me to take the actions and create thechannels for the Universe to flow through.

22 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

RRPsStep Five

The fifth step in creating your dreams is to develop routines,rituals, and practices (RRPs) that feed your commitment toyour goal and your motivation to take continuous action.New dreams are delicate and it’s easy for the demands of lifeto draw you in and weaken your connection to your dreams.Sometimes fear comes masked as busyness or procrastinationwhen, in actuality, you’re really pulling back to avoid therisk of failure, success, or criticism. When you allow yourenergetic focus to wane, or focus more on your fear thanthe positive and wonderful feelings of creating your dreams,they will fall into suspended animation – into the category ofsomeday. Powerful RRPs guard against these devolutions bystoking your energy and maintaining your connection to thepositive feelings and motivations behind your desires. Theystrengthen you and diminish the dream dashing effects of fear.Your perfect RRPs are unique to you and to be effective theymust be enjoyable and easy.

If possible, carve out an hour each day for your rituals but noless than 15 minutes. Observe any resistance that comes upas you read this instruction. Acknowledge that if somethingimportant emerged in your life and required this time, you’daccommodate it. Make this important.

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Here are a selection of RRPs that I’ve used with tremendoussuccess.

Meditate. I strongly encourage you to listen to my “Connectwith Your Inner Goddess Guided Mediation.” It will shoreup your connection to your center and intuitive wisdom. Ifyour heart’s desire involves prosperity and abundance, visitmy YouTube Channel and watch my “Guided Meditation forProsperity” (http://bit.ly/178M8pS). Both of these meditationshave helped me and many others shift their inner environmentto one of powerful possibility, worthiness and wisdom.

Move. Shift and release the energy in your body. Choose anexercise that works to release stressful and stagnant energyfrom your body. Yoga is my favorite choice, but it’s importantthat you choose something that feels good to you. Dedicateyour practice to your goal or intention, or to all the peoplewho will benefit from you successfully creating your dream.

Swoon. Choose a theme song for your dream and listen toit every day, especially when you need energy. When I wasgetting off of welfare, my theme song was Mariah Carey’s“Make It Happen.” When I graduated from law school andtook on my fear of acting, my song was Diana Ross’s “I’mComing Out.” They changed my emotional state immediatelyand still do.

Soak. Make bathing a ritual. If you have a tub, fill it withwarm water, organic flower essences, oils and sea salts. Relaxand reflect on how you’re showing up in your life. Whatwould you like to do differently? What do you no longerneed? In your mind’s eye, see everything that doesn’t serve

24 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

you being drawn out by the salt, purified, and washed downthe drain.

Journal. If you’re familiar with the Harry Potter series, youknow about Dumbledore’s pensive – a glass bowl filled withmemories. Dumbledore places his wand next to his head anddraws out a silvery wisp of memory and places it in the pensivefor safe keeping. Let your journal serve as your pensive. Writea note every day about your heart’s desire. Write an action youtook or plan to take, a hope or fear. Write a note to yourselfreassuring and appreciating your steadfast commitment toyou. In time, you’ll come to love your journal and it will standas proof of how much you’ve grown and how far you’ve gone.

Flame. Say a prayer or claim your desire as being birthed intomanifestation and light a candle. Let the flame represent andsustain your dream.

Two. Make an intelligent exception to the keeping dreamssecret rule. Share your vision with someone who will hold thespace for its easy manifestation. This person can be anyone,so long as they are fiercely supportive of you and desiring ofyour highest good. You are human and you will not alwaysfeel strong and confident. When you get discouraged or yourvision weakens, your confidant will still be holding yourvision and supporting you. This ensures that a constant supplyof energy is infusing your dream.

Heartwork #1

Choose an RRP from above or create your own.

RRP's 25

ActionStep Six

The sixth step in manifesting your desires is to take consistentaction toward your goals and adapt to changes along the way.The importance of this step cannot be overestimated. We livein a physical universe. As such, we create in thought andmanifest through action.

Take at least one action toward the attainment of your dreamsevery day. When you’re busy or stressed, make the actionsmall (send an email, gather information, learn about a persondoing what you want to do, make a call – just do something).Small steps taken consistently over time add up and createsubstantial results.

Even just 15 minutes of focused action a day amounts to 91+hours a year. Imagine the positive change you could create in91 hours. Now imagine if on some days you devoted two orthree focused hours to your heart’s desires. In one year’s time,your whole world will change.

The key word when talking about action is: focused. Whenwe devote all of our attention to one thing, our productivityskyrockets. Many people hear the word “productivity” andget turned off because it sounds like miserable work, the kindchampioned in business school and corporate seminars, butwhen you view productivity as synonymous with birthing

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your deepest desires, you’ll realize the pleasures of beingproductive.

The keys to high productivity are: 1) calendar what’simportant to you and; 2) single-task. Your calendar is yourticket to freedom. I know it feels just the opposite, but give ita month and your productivity and free time will sky-rocket.If you’re like most people, you spend a lot of time thinkingabout what needs to be done. You plan in your head andwhen something new comes up, you move your mental plansaround and figure out how to accommodate it. To make sureyou don’t lose track of your objectives, you run your plansthrough your mind often and may make “to do” lists that causeyou to spend more time on the mental planning. All of thismental planning feels like work. It eats up time, lulls you intothinking you’ve done something, and takes energy. You canspend a whole day thinking of what you’re going to do for therest of the month and telling others that you have no time fornew meetings or opportunities. Learning to use and maintainyour calendar will end all these mental machinations forever.You’ll know exactly when you’re going to do what and you’llbe able to see that you’ve made time for everything you wantto do. Prioritize and work on what has the greatest power tomove you towards your goal. Ask yourself: “what one actionwould advance my objective the most?” Be discerning. Willspending hours perfecting a letter move you further alongthan calling someone who has the power to say yes to you?Make a choice, calendar it and follow through.

Before we move on, I want to give you a very powerful tip:be okay with not getting things that don’t advance your goalsdone. Be okay with mistakes and imperfections. Keep movingforward. Perfection is grossly overrated. Show up, strive for

Action 27

excellence and take the next step. You will make mistakes,things won’t be 100% perfect, but they’ll be close and you’ll bemoving forward. The only people who never make mistakes,get criticized, or fall are those who do NOTHING.

I was exceptionally resistant to adopting a calendar. I am arebel at heart and despise conforming to rules and systems.For me, this changed when I recognized that the only thingsthat go on my calendar are things I choose to put there.Calendaring your life makes sure you tend to your priorities,both professional and personal, and it frees up precious timeand energy.

The next boon to your productivity is to surrender the idea ofmulti-tasking. Multi-tasking feels busy and it makes our egofeel like we must be very important because we’re so busy, butit’s proven that when we are multi-tasking we are the leastproductive. When you devote all of your attention to one task,that task will be completed faster and better than when yousplit your attention.

Before you begin single-tasking, do what you can to eliminateinterruptions and distractions. They create the same poorperformance that multi-tasking does. There’s a Microsoftstudy of workers, that found that, on average, they wereinterrupted about four times an hour, and 40% of the timethey did not return to the task they were working on. Thebottom line is things don’t get done when we’re multi-tasking, being interrupted, or getting distracted.

Help yourself by creating an environment that supports yoursuccess. Eliminate interruptions in advance by turning allphones off, closing the internet, closing your email, telling the

28 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

people around you that you cannot be disturbed for the nexthour, or however much time you need.

When something interrupts you while working, swiftlyaddress it by telling them that you’ll be available at a specifictime and don’t engage in chit chat; be direct and get backto work. Granted, there are times when something can’t beignored, but the majority of the time this isn’t the case. Learnto set healthy boundaries, so that you have the peace andprivacy to pursue your passions.

Here’s a Q&A from my radio show that articulates theimportance of unapologetically setting and upholding clearboundaries:

Celia asked: I am finding that in order for me to pursue my dreams,I have to cut back on other things in my life, such as spending timewith friends, and I am having a hard time with this, because I can’tsay no and feel guilty when I hurt people’s feelings. Do you haveany advice for me?

Well, dear Celia, I do.

First, understand your “why” (your reason for cutting back on friendtime). You are cutting back because you have dreams and goals, andif you hang around with your friends, instead of expressing what isseeking to come through you, you might regret it for the rest of yourlife. You want to experience the joy of living out what’s in yourheart. You want to honor the gifts and dreams you were sent herewith. You want to discover the best in you. That’s your “why” andit’s monumental.

Action 29

Second, if your friends are really friends, and I am assuming theyare, they love you and will understand and support you in pursuingyour desires. Share this with them, you will feel better and youmay even inspire them to connect with their own dreams. The shiftdoesn’t have to be drastic. You don’t have to stop hanging out alltogether, just make your dreams a priority and create a habit ofputting work before play. There are studies that show that those whodelay gratification are more successful than those who do not.

Next, you must learn how to say “no.” You must feel comfortablesaying it whenever you really want to. If you have to choose betweennot giving someone what they want and going against yourself, thechoice should be easy, they’ll have to handle themselves while youtake your own side and support yourself in doing what is rightfor you. This is key in building self-confidence and self-trust. Howto say “no”: say it and stop talking. Be light and kind, and getcomfortable with silence (silently sing the alphabet if you have to).Saying “no” is not synonymous with saying “I hate you” or beinghurtful. It’s just “no.” If you really want to give an explanation whenyou say “no,” you can, but keep it super short and don’t make it ahabit. You don’t have to explain yourself or justify why you chooseto honor your desires.

Finally, dump the whole idea of feeling guilty for hurting theirfeelings. Guilt is a toxic emotion which produces nothing good foranyone. Remorse is appropriate where you regret harming another,but there is no harm here. This is a great time to mention BronnieWare, who spent years as a hospice nurse caring for dying people.In her book, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, she shares that thenumber one regret of the dying is: “I wish I’d had the courage to livea life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”

30 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

In sum, your dreams are certain to manifest when you takeconsistent action, prioritize and calendar it, single-task,eliminate interruptions, set and uphold healthy boundaries. Amassive side benefit of adopting these practices is that theybuild the muscles of self-confidence, trust, and perseverance.These are the holy grails of success.

Action 31

PersevereStep Seven

The seventh step in creating your dreams is to persevere.

Perseverance is defined as steady persistence in a course ofaction, a purpose, a state, etc., especially in spite of difficulties,obstacles, or discouragement.

I’ve had several experiences and worked with many peoplewho, at times, appeared to be destined for endless failure –nothing seemed to work, they felt defeated, and people saidthey’d never make it – but by persevering they found success.The following quote hangs in my kitchen, for my childrenand me to see every day:

“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent willnot; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent.Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Educationwill not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence anddetermination alone are omnipotent. The slogan Press On! hassolved and always will solve the problems of the human race.” ―Calvin Coolidge

Learn to collect “no’s” as a means of getting to “yes.” Theworld’s most successful people have experienced the mostrejections. Here are some examples:

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J.K. Rowling was rejected by 12 publishers before the 13thgave her a measly $3,000 advance and agreed to publish HarryPotter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.

At 5’11 and 165 lbs, Wayne Gretzsky was deemed too smalland slow for professional hockey.

James Redfield couldn’t get “The Celestine Prophecy”published by publishers (so he did it himself). It has sold 20million copies worldwide.

Jack London received more than 600 rejection letters.

A young Barbara Walters was advised by a CBS executive to“Stay out of television.”

Eddie Arcaro (Secretariat jockey) lost 250 races beforewinning.

Stephen Spielberg was rejected by UCLA’s & USC’s filmschools.

Paradox #3

To co-create with the Universe we must persevere by givingall we have to our desired goal and, at the very same time,we must surrender and let go of the outcome. This alwayscauses much consternation from my coaching clients. Theyask: “How can I live full out and put my everything intosomething and, at the same time, let go of how it turns out?”

This is the very nature of co-creating. You are responsible foryour part, and the Universe has its own ways, reasons, and

Persevere 33

wisdom. Trust it. When things don’t go the way you plan,suspend doubt and judgment. Trust that something better willcome, or that you’ve been spared something unwanted, or thatyou may not be ready yet. Trust in the wisdom and supportof the Infinite, and a good greater than you could foresee willemerge.

Persevere and let go. I’ve had many experiences I perceivedas failures, but without fail a time comes in the future whenthe purpose of the event becomes clear. Often the intenseenergy we expend clinging to something is the single greatestobstacle to our good. It makes us plot, manipulate and attemptto control life – something that rarely succeeds, and if itappears to succeed, often backfires. It also interferes with ourinner state, it blocks energy and stops flow. Most upset isderived from our unwillingness to accept or releasesomething. Like holding water, the tighter we grasp, the lesswe have. We greatly improve our lives and results by letting itgo.

Letting go also does not mean giving up. It means that we takeour frenetic, chaotic energy out of the picture and release ourattachment to the outcome. If you believe in a force greaterthan you (God, Spirit, Universal Energy etc.), letting go is anact of surrender to the power responsible for beating heartsand suspending the planets in the sky, surely it can handle yourconcerns.

34 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

Afterword

What I’ve learned, after decades of practicing and teaching theprinciples in this book, is:

When you stand in grace, chart your course and set sail towardyour heart’s desires, the Universe will turn the tides in thedirection of your greatest good.

No desire that emanates from your heart is too good, toounrealistic, or too much to create. There’s no such thing as toolate, and nothing is impossible for you.

This is your time.

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Connect with Cynthia

Stay Connected!

www.ResurrectingVenus.com

www.facebook.com/LIFEblog

www.twitter.com/CynthiaOccelli

www.YouTube.com/CynthiaOccelli

Listen to the Resurrecting Venus Show on Hay House Radiowww.hayhouseradio.com

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About Cynthia

I’ve read literally thousands of self empowerment and spiritualbooks. Invariably, I’ve wondered whether the author waswriting about their truth. I wanted to glimpse into theirprivate spaces and see if they lived their messages as perfectlyas presented. A few times, I was able to interact with wildlypopular authors in private settings and what I witnessed shookme. I discovered that they were human, not the perfect peopletheir writings portrayed. At first, it bothered me. I felt misledfor not being shown the whole picture. Soon, I realized theunfairness inherent in my reaction. I took the authors off ofthe pedestals I’d placed them on and embraced them as peoplejust like me.

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I don’t want to be put on any pedestals either. So I chose totake this space, traditionally reserved for impressing you withmy achievements, and give you a peek into my world, so thatyou’ll know that I am human, too. Just like you.

Not every day is a wonderful day for me. Sometimes, I’mtired, impatient, and have no interest in seeing another humanbeing. I am not a perfect mother, daughter, lover, or friend,but most of the time I endeavor to be and sometimes, I’m justgrumpy. I cry, get angry, and on occasion the world gets thebest of me, and I take a soak in victimhood. On the positiveside, these moments don’t last very long anymore. I read myown books and blogs and the instant I am able, I walk my talk.I’m not perfect, but I like me.

I am driven to rescue wild and domestic animals in traffic, andbecause I often work in my pajamas and wear them to pickup my daughter, you may well see me flailing about in thestreets of Los Angeles, trying to catch a shrew (yep, my lastrescue was a shrew, I named him Percy) and looking more likea sasquatch, than Venus.

I work too much sometimes. I can write for ten hours or more.It isn’t good for me or my family, and I have to use disciplineto stop. I’m a very friendly loner and an introvert. I love peopleintensely, but if there’s a crowd, chances are I won’t be init. I speak publicly, not because I like to, but because I feelcompelled to. My burning desire is to materially improve thelives of as many people as I possibly can in one lifetime. It’s myway of transmuting my losses into wins; I call it the alchemyof pain.

38 7 Steps to Manifesting Your Heart's Desires

I have a man who loves me the way every woman deservesto be loved. My children are the light of my life. I am fiercelyindependent and very attached to my mother. I’ve had thesame best friend since I was twelve. I’d lay my life down forany one of them.

I am the most powerful person in my life and most days I wakeup surrounded by beauty and filled with passion and love. Itwas not always this way. I am finally free, at home in my skin,and happier than ever before.

I am always growing and changing, but my promise to youis this: I’ve built my life by applying the ways of being andstrategies contained in this book.

They work. Take them and make them yours.

With love,

Cynthia

About Cynthia 39