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format Dave Asprey: Recently I discovered one of nature's miracle foods walking around at the Bulletproof Conference in Pasadena. That's where I met Walid, the owner the Desert Farms, a company that sells organic camel milk across the United States. We talked about camel milk and I learned some things about camel milk that I read about but hadn't really focused on. It has a bunch of immune-active molecules that you don't get from normal milk. It has a bunch of beneficial bacteria different that you would get from cow milk. It's full of lactoferrin, which is a natural substance that has antibacterial, antiviral, antiparasitic, and anticancer properties even. It contains bioidentical IGF1, which is insulin-like growth factor, which is the only natural hormone that promotes muscle growth and uses fat stores instead of glucose. It's compatible with things like ketose and brain octane. It doesn't have lactoglobulin, which is something that messes with you if you're lactose intolerant. Camel milk from Desert Farms is organic, paleo approved, it works for keto, it's GMO-free, pasture-raised, basically meets all the requirements for the Bulletproof diet without all the inflammation that can come from cow milk protein. Head over to DesertFarms.com and get 20% off anything on the website using promo code Bulletproof20 at checkout. Again, that's DesertFarms.com promo code Bulletproof20. Totally worth your time to give this a shot. Female: Bulletproof Radio, a state of high performance. Dave Asprey: You're listening to Bulletproof radio with Dave Asprey. You ever have one of those times when you're in a really big meeting, really big stakes, and you start to sweat because well, it's hot or maybe even because you're nervous. It's certainly happened to me maybe in one of my first Silicon Valley pitch meetings, and I never liked that. It was really a problem for me when I was heavier. It turns out now you no longer need to worry about under-arm sweat or the embarrassment of sweat appearing through your shirt with an undershirt from Thompson Tee. The Thompson Tee with hydro-shield sweat-proof technology is a patented undershirt guaranteed to completely block underarm sweat preventing those embarrassing wet marks and yellow stains. They're handcrafted in the USA. The undershirts come in a variety of styles, sizes, and colors. I like these because there's no chemical treatment so the effectiveness doesn't wash out over time and they're machine washer and dryer safe so they're as convenient as normal stuff without all the weird chemicals. Every shirt comes with an unconditional 30-day money back guarantee regardless if it's been worn, so you wear it, wash it, and try it. Everyone should have at least one Thompson Tee for that special meeting or event when you need to look really good. Thompson Tee serves over 50,000 loyal customers in 80 countries. Visit ThompsonTee.com/Bulletproof right now and enter
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DaveAsprey: RecentlyIdiscoveredoneofnature'smiraclefoodswalkingaroundattheBulletproofConferenceinPasadena.That'swhereImetWalid,theownertheDesertFarms,acompanythatsellsorganiccamelmilkacrosstheUnitedStates.WetalkedaboutcamelmilkandIlearnedsomethingsaboutcamelmilkthatIreadaboutbuthadn'treallyfocusedon.Ithasabunchofimmune-activemoleculesthatyoudon'tgetfromnormalmilk.Ithasabunchofbeneficialbacteriadifferentthatyouwouldgetfromcowmilk.It'sfulloflactoferrin,whichisanaturalsubstancethathasantibacterial,antiviral,antiparasitic,andanticancerpropertieseven.ItcontainsbioidenticalIGF1,whichisinsulin-likegrowthfactor,whichistheonlynaturalhormonethatpromotesmusclegrowthandusesfatstoresinsteadofglucose.It'scompatiblewiththingslikeketoseandbrainoctane.Itdoesn'thavelactoglobulin,whichissomethingthatmesseswithyouifyou'relactoseintolerant.
CamelmilkfromDesertFarmsisorganic,paleoapproved,itworksforketo,it'sGMO-free,pasture-raised,basicallymeetsalltherequirementsfortheBulletproofdietwithoutalltheinflammationthatcancomefromcowmilkprotein.HeadovertoDesertFarms.comandget20%offanythingonthewebsiteusingpromocodeBulletproof20atcheckout.Again,that'sDesertFarms.compromocodeBulletproof20.Totallyworthyourtimetogivethisashot.
Female: BulletproofRadio,astateofhighperformance.
DaveAsprey: You'relisteningtoBulletproofradiowithDaveAsprey.Youeverhaveoneofthosetimeswhenyou'reinareallybigmeeting,reallybigstakes,andyoustarttosweatbecausewell,it'shotormaybeevenbecauseyou'renervous.It'scertainlyhappenedtomemaybeinoneofmyfirstSiliconValleypitchmeetings,andIneverlikedthat.ItwasreallyaproblemformewhenIwasheavier.Itturnsoutnowyounolongerneedtoworryaboutunder-armsweatortheembarrassmentofsweatappearingthroughyourshirtwithanundershirtfromThompsonTee.TheThompsonTeewithhydro-shieldsweat-prooftechnologyisapatentedundershirtguaranteedtocompletelyblockunderarmsweatpreventingthoseembarrassingwetmarksandyellowstains.They'rehandcraftedintheUSA.Theundershirtscomeinavarietyofstyles,sizes,andcolors.Ilikethesebecausethere'snochemicaltreatmentsotheeffectivenessdoesn'twashoutovertimeandthey'remachinewasheranddryersafesothey'reasconvenientasnormalstuffwithoutalltheweirdchemicals.
Everyshirtcomeswithanunconditional30-daymoneybackguaranteeregardlessifit'sbeenworn,soyouwearit,washit,andtryit.EveryoneshouldhaveatleastoneThompsonTeeforthatspecialmeetingoreventwhenyouneedtolookreallygood.ThompsonTeeservesover50,000loyalcustomersin80countries.VisitThompsonTee.com/Bulletproofrightnowandenter
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Bulletproofatcheckouttoget20%offyourorder.That'sThompsonT-E-E.com/BulletproofandenterBulletproofatcheckout.
Today'scoolfactsofthedayisthatwhenmostpeoplewillthinkofpsychopathstheythinkofpeoplelikeHannibalLecterorJeffreyDahmer,butnotallpsychopathsareviolentcriminals.Infact,mostofthemaren't.Someofthemostsuccessfulandcharmingpeopleintheworldtodayarepsychopaths.There'sacombinationofpersuasion,manipulation,deceitandchameleon-likeabilitiestogetpeopletodowhateveritistheywant.AnotherinterestingfactisthatadisproportionatenumberofCEOs,lawyers,entertainers,salesprofessionals,andofcourse,politicians,havepsychopathictendencies.
Today'sguestontheshowisaguywhoknows-
JordanH: Greatlead-in.
DaveAsprey: Isaguywhoknowsathingortwoaboutpsychopaths.Justkidding.Ithinkaboutthatintro,Jordan,inadditiontorunningBulletproofRadio,I'malsoafull-timeCEOatBulletproof.We'reacoffeecompany,wemake[inaudible00:03:56]andthingslikethat,andoneofthingsIpayattentiontoishiring.SomethingthatI'dliketosharewithyouisifyou'rehiring,doyouknowwheretopostyourjobtofindthebestcandidates,isn'tenoughtofindqualitycandidates.Ifyouwanttofindtheperfecthire,youneedtopostyourjobonallthetopjobsitesandnowyoucanwithZipRecruiter.comyoucanpostyourjobto100-plusjobsitesincludingsocialmedianetworkslikeFacebookandTwitterallwithasingleclick.Findcandidatesinanycityorindustrynationwide.JustpostonceandwatchyourqualifiedcandidatesrollintoZipRecruiter'seasy-to-useinterface.Nojugglingemailsorcallstoyouroffice.Quicklyscreencandidates,ratethem,andhiretherightpersonfast.
FindouttodaywhyZipRecruiterhasbeenusedbyoveronemillionbusinesses,andrightnowmylistenerscanpostjobsonZipRecruiterforfreebygoingtoZipRecruiter.com/bullet.That'sZipRecruiter.com/bullet.Onemoretime,tryitforfree.GotoZipRecruiter.com/bullet.
Well,thisisJordanHarbinger,verysuccessfulpodcasterwhorunsTheArtofCharmpodcastwhostudiescharmandnotallpeoplewhoarecharmingarepsychopaths,fewofthemare.Still,Ithoughtitwasagreatintroforyou,Jordan.
JordanH: Yeah,thanks.JordanHarbinger,part-timepsychopathhere.
DaveAsprey: Jordan'spodcast,TheArtofCharm,getsabouttwomilliondownloadsamonth,maybetwo-and-a-halfmillion,roughlytwiceofBulletproofRadio.Basically,we'rebothprettygoodpodcasters,butbecauseJordan'ssocharming,he'skickingmyassasfarasIcantell.
JordanH: It'sthepsychofactor.Itworkseverytime.
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DaveAsprey: Theotherthing'sthatinterestingthatJordandoesandthereasonwe'vegothimontheshowtodayisthatherunsTheArtofCharmbootcampswhereheteachespeopleaboutrelationships,business,networking,andself-confidence.Asyou'dexpectforaguywithhislevelofvisibility'sbeeninallthemediathingslikeHuffingtonPostandMen'sHealthandDetailsmagazine.Thecoolthing,andwe'regoingtotalkaboutthisontheshow,isthathe'ssocharming.Hetalkedhiswaytofreedomduringtwodifferentkidnappingattempts,justkindoflegit.
JordanH: Theywereactuallysuccessfulkidnappings.
DaveAsprey: Youwerekidnapped?
JordanH: Yeah,twice.It'sfunnybecauseattempts,atwhatpointdoesitnotbecomeakidnappinganymore?Idon'tknow,butwecanexplorethat.
DaveAsprey: We'regoingtotalkaboutresolutionsandhowtogetthingsyouwantintoyourlifeandhowtobuildthemin,becauseyouspendalotoftimethinkingaboutthatandwe'rereallygoingtofocusonthemostpopularNewYear'sresolutionof2015,itwasthemostpopularonesaccordingtoACNielsenwhomeasuresthiscrap.I'mgoingtoaskyouhowanaveragepersoncanachievethosegoals.Beforethen,howcananaveragepersontalktheirwayoutoftwokidnappings?Tellmethestory.We'lljustgothere.
JordanH: Sure.I'llshortenthembothupsowedon'ttakeupthewholeshow,butbasicallythefirstkidnapstoryIwas20.I'm36nowsotoputthatincontext.SixteenyearsagoIwasinMexicoCityandIworkedforanon-profit.Ilivedinacrappyarea,kindofalikebarrio-typeplace,andIlivedontheroofofahousethatwasnotfinished.IlivedwiththisfamilyandIgotintoataxianditturnedouttobeafaketaxi.OneofthereasonsI'mstillhereisbecausenobodyhadmobilephonesin2000,especiallyinMexicoCity.Itwasjustnotathing.Mostpeopledidn'thavecellphones.Theguywastryingtodrivetoanareawherehehad,Iassume,hadreinforcementsorotherpeoplewaitingforhimtoshowupsotheycouldprobablygetinandtakepeoplewhohehadthrowninthecarormaybejustrobthemorbeatthemup,whatever.
AtthatpointIhadbeenworkingoutalot.Iwasdoing,atthatpoint,whatwenowcallMMA,sogroundfightingandboxingandstufflikethat.WejustcalledkihonwhichissomeJapanesewordforbasic.Iwas20soIhadbeenliftingweightseverydayandthisguywasprobably50andhe'dbeendrivingacabeveryday.Youcanimaginethedifferenceinourphysics.Icouldn'tgetoutofthecarbecauseyouknowhowoldcarsespecially,itwasaVWBug,thelocksonoldcrappycars,theplasticpartsrippedofsotheygobelowthewindowframe,Iguessyouwouldsay?Icouldn'tjustpullthelockup.Whenthedoorswerelocked,I'mstuckinthiscarunlessthisautoglassormaybenotautoglass,thisplateglass.Thenwhat?Reachoutandthenthedoorstilllocked.Iwas,"WhatamIgoingtodo?"
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Itoldhimtoturnaroundandhewouldn'tturnaround.Itoldhimtoletmeout,hewouldn'tletmeout.Atthenextlight,hehadsloweddownandIwas,"Look,letmeoutofthiscar."Hegoes,"No,no,no,myfriend'shouseisrightuphere."Hestartstopulloverinfrontoftheseshady,grossbuildingsandIwasdon'tgetoutofthecar,don'tgetoutofthecar.Iputmyarmbetweenhimandthedoorthinkingwhatifhejustbouncesoutofthecar?Hemadeafastoneforthedoor.Hedidn'tknowmyarmwasthere.Ijustreachedaroundtheseatandjustbasicallyreachedentirelyaroundmyarmandpulledinandjustsmotheredhimwithmyforearmbasically.
DaveAsprey: Nice.
JordanH: Thenhestoppedmovingforaminute.IhadtocrawlbetweenthetwofrontseatsbecauseIstillcouldn'tgetoutofthecar.Ihadtocrawlbetweenthetwofrontseats,openhisdoor,pushhimout,getout.Triedtogetthekeysanddrivethecar.Ididn'tknowhowtodriveastickshift,especiallyastickshiftthathadbeenmanufacturedin1968.IcoulddriveaniceFordMustangorsomethingbutIwasn'tabouttobeabletofigureout...There'satrickwithaclutch.Witheverycarthat'sover10yearsoldhasatrick,maybeevenfiveyearsold.Icouldn'tfigurethisoutandadrenalinewasgoingcrazy.Asyouknowjustfromyourstudies,whenthere'senoughadrenalineyoucouldn'tprobablydothealphabet,soletalonetrytofigureouthowdoastickwhileyou'retryingtomakesurenobody'scomingout.
Iendedupnotbeingabletodothecarthing.Tookthekeysoutoftheignitionandchuckedthemsothattheycouldn'tchasemeinthecarandjustran.Idon'tknowhowfarIran,butitseemslikesomekindofhalfmarathonandI'mrunningitinBananaRepublicchinosandstuffuntilIgettoamainroad.ThenI'mtryingtoflagdowncars,butI'mdrenchedinsweat,I'mawhitedudeinMexicoCity.AtthetimeIhadfakedyedblondhairbecauseIwas20andIwasidiotandIdidthattomyself.NobodywouldstopandIjustkeptthinkingwhatiftheseguyscomeback?
Finallysomeonestoppedandtookmetoametrostationbecausetheywere,"Whatareyoudoinghere?"Iwasdressedreallynicely.IjustlookedlikecrapbecauseIhadbeenrunning.IwasclearlysuperscaredsoIthinktheyjustrealized,allright,thisguy'sinthemiddleofthe'hoodandthisdoctorhadstoppedwithwhoIthoughtwashisdaughternowIthinkit'sprobablyhisgirlfriendactually.Shewasone-thirdofhisage.She's,"Wecan'tjustleavehimhere,"becauseIwasinthemiddleofthe'hoodsotheytookme.Ididn'ttalkmywayoutofthatone.Thatwasabrut-forcemethod.
DaveAsprey: Yousmotheredyourwayoutofit.
JordanH: Ismotheredmywayoutofit.ThesecondonethatIhadwasIworkedasanEnglishteacherintheformerYugoslavRepublicofSerbia.NotSiberia,butSerbia.Alotofpeoplegetthosetwothingsconfused.
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Yugoslavia/Macedonia/whatever.Infact,westillcalledinYugoslaviain2005andthat'sthenameithadonmaps.Inthosecountriesyouhavetoregisterwiththepolicewhereveryougobecausethey'resocialistandtheywanttokeeptabsoneverybody.Theydon'thavepeskyfreedomgettinginthewayofauthoritarianrule.IdecidedIcandothat,butitbecamemoreandmoreofapainbecauseyouhavetothepolicestation,yougottowaitatthepolicestation,yougottoregisteratthepolicestation,andthepoliceweretotaljerksaboutiteverytime.Theytreatyoulikeacriminal.
OnetimeIwastherereallylateatnightbecauseyou'vegottoregisterthedayyougetin.I'dgotteninat11:00,soIwassittingthereat1:30a.m.andinsteadofdoingthepaperworktheyjustdecided,oh,youmustbeacriminalbecauseyou'reheresolate,soyou'regoingtojail.Theythrewmeinjailwithabunchofromawomen,akagypsies,whichIthinkisnotanicetermforthat.I'mnotsure.
DaveAsprey: Ithinkthey'reokaywithcallingthemselvesthat.
JordanH: Theymight.
DaveAsprey: Ihaveafewfriendswhostillcallthemselvesgypsies.
JordanH: SodoI,Ijustdon'twantanybody,"Howdareyou?"Technically,roma.
DaveAsprey: We'rebothoffendingpeopleinadvertently?
JordanH: Yes,exactly.I'minjailwiththemandthey'rechainsmokingandyellingandtalkingthewholenightandIthought,thisisthelasttimeI'mgoingtovoluntarilyregister.Istoppeddoingthat,sotheystartedlookingformethinkingthisguy'ssomekindofspy.IendeduponstatesecurityradarbecauseIwasnotregisteredwiththepolice,butmyjobasanEnglishteacher,thepeoplepayingmysalarywastheUSDepartmentofDefense.Theywere,oh,he'sdefinitelyaspy.Thisisacover.Thentheyfoundmeandmybuddy.HisdadwasawarcriminalintheformerYugoslaviasohehadfallenoutoffavorwiththecurrentfolksandhelivedinItaly.Hisstep-daywasSaddamHussein'slawyer.Thisguyhadsomeweirdconnectionstoacountrythatwerenogood.
HehappenedtoliveinthisbuildingwherethisarmsdealerhadbeenbustedacoupleweekspriorandtheyfoundRPGsandstuff.Hisaddresswasalloverthenews.Thepoliceeventuallycaughtuptousatafestivalandtheythoughtwegotthisguywholivesinthearmsdealer'sbuildingandthenwegotthisguywho'ssupposedlyanEnglishteacherwhowasnotregisteredwiththepolice.Thiscan'tbejustacoincidence.TheytookusandtheyweretakingusoffthefestivalislandwhichwasinthisoldTurkishfortress,speakingofGameofThrones,itlookedalotlikethat.Theystartedyellingatusandtheywerereally,reallyaggressive.Theywerealsodruggedoutbecausetheirstatesecurityofficers,it'snotlikethisprofessionalFBIstatesecurityCIA-types.Alotofthem
BPR-JordanHarbinger2016 Page 6 of 27
arejustlikedeadbeatwarcriminalsfromBosniathatgotrelocatedtoBelgradeorwherever,or[Movisaad00:14:16].
Theseguys,theywerenotthinkinglogically.IpulledinalotofAOC,ArtofCharm,principles,likegetthememotionallyreactinginadifferentwaybecausetheywere,"Americabombedus.You'reaspy."Iwas,allright,Igottoreguidetheiremotionstosomethingmorecalmandthenredirectthem,notreguide.Ineedtoredirectthemtosomewheremorecalm.Istartedtalkingaboutyeah,AmericaisfullofshitandagreewiththemandthenbringitdownacouplenotcheswhereIgoIlovelivinghere.It'samazing,it'ssofun.Ilovethefoodandthedrinks.Allright,theseguysareslightlyoverweightandthey'redrunk,sofoodanddrink.They'reprobablyhugefans.
Westartedtalkingaboutthosethingsand,ofcourse,myfriendisallpullingthewhole,"DoyouknowwhoIam,"kindofthing,or"Doyouknowwhomydadis?"Thatdidn'tworkaswell.Theytookustothissafehouse.TheywerestillbasicallybeatingthesnotoutofmyfriendandtheyweretalkingwithmemoreaboutSerbiancultureandfoodandtryingtodiscernwhetherornotIwasactuallyaspyorjustactuallyateacher,whichIwas.EveryemotionaltopicIbroughtbackdowntoalogicallevel.Ifitwas,"Youbombedus,youguysarefuckers,"orwhatever,Iwouldjustgo,"Allright,actuallywhatwedois..."this,orhere'sthisotherwaythatweoperate.Here'swhatI'mdoing,I'mteachingEnglishtorefugees.Theywerelike,"ThisisBS,"andI'dsay,"Callmyboss."
TheywouldbeonmyphoneandIjustkeptthemthinkingandIkeptthemthinkingandIkeptthemtalking.Oncepeoplegetemotional,theycangetoutofcontrolandthingscanescalate.That'swhyyouseecrowdsgoinginsaneoverstupidstufflikesportsorevennontrivialstufflikeelections.Youseepeoplewhoarenormallyjustquietsittinginthecornerdoingpaperworklightingpolicecarsonfire,right,becausethey'rejustsoemotional.Itriedtokeepthemoutofthatstateasmuchaspossible.Afterawhile,Ihadbeentalkingaboutfood,politics,andreallykeepingthisguyinalogicalheadspace.Eventually,Iaskedforsomewater.Sincewewereinthisplacewheretherewerebrokenandrustypipescomingoutofthebasement,Iknewthathewouldhavetogoupstairstogetwater.
Hewentupstairs.Iheardnothingforawhile,andthenIheardhimactuallygetinthecaranddriveawaythinkingtheymaybehadtogobuysomewater.You'reprobablythinkingwellwhatdotheycarewhetherornotyouhavewaterandthetruthis,Igottheguywhowasinterrogatingmetoatleastrespectmeenoughasahuman.WewerereallysickandIwasstillbloodyandstufffromearlierstuff.Theywereallright,weneedtotakecareofthis.Iwas,"Look,Ineedtobeingoodcondition.Ihaveameetingwiththeforeignministertomorrow,"droppingsomethingsthatsaidlook,I'mgoingtobemissedandI'malsoconnectedwithpeopleingovernmentinyourcountry.Luckily,oneofmystudentswastheinteriorministeratonepointandalsoarepresentativetotheUN.Iwasabletodrophisnameandtheywereabletogo,"Whoisthis?Canwe
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verifythis?"Itwasinterestingbecauseevenmyownstudentcouldn'tdoanythingtogetmeoutofthatsituationandcouldn'thelpmeafterthatsituation,buthewasabletoverifythattheseweregovernmentguys.
AftertheygotintheJeepandbounced,Idraggedmyfriendoutofthereandweessentiallyre-escapedtheseguysandgotre-arrestedbyregularpolicewhodidn'tbelieveawordofwhatweweresayinguntiltheyverifiedthatwewereinablackJeepwithgovernmentplates,withtints.Here'stheguyswhattheylookedandeverythingandtheyfoundthemlaterandtheycouldn'tdoanything.Thepoliceactuallyfoundthemandalltheydidwasgetourphonesbackandmyhat.Itwasverylucky.Myfriendhadpuncturewoundsalloverhisbodyfromneedlesthattheywerejabbinghimwith.
DaveAsprey: Wow.
JordanH: Hewasbleeding,hehadburns,sohehadtogotothemilitaryhospitalforfourdays.
DaveAsprey: Hewasseriouslytortured.Theybeatyouup,butyoustillstayedcalm.
JordanH: Itwasaboutstayingcalmandaboutredirectingtheconversationtoalogicallevel,becauseit'sreallyhardtogetupsetandemotionalwhenyou'realsotryingtosolveaproblemwithyourbrain.
DaveAsprey: It'stotallytrueandthere'swaysyoucanpracticethat,right?Ididtheurbanescapeandevasioncourseawhileback.
JordanH: WithKevin...Whotaughtthat?
DaveAsprey: ThatwasKevinReeve.
JordanH: Yeah,KevinReeve.Itookthatsamecourse,exactly.
DaveAsprey: Nice.
JordanH: Yeah,afterwards,fiveyearstoolate.
DaveAsprey: Youtookitafterwardsso-
JordanH: Itookitmuch,yeah,afterwards.
DaveAsprey: Forlisteners,thisisacourseyoucangothroughwheretheyteachyouwhattodoifyou'rekidnapped,howtogetoutofhandcuffsandhowtoknowyou'rebeingtailed,howtotailpeople.Thefinalexamistheyliterallyhoodyou,handcuffyou,throwyouinthebackofavanandyouhavetoescapeandthenrunmissionswhileateamofbountyhuntersareafteryou.Whatmademethinkofthis,Jordan,isyoutalkabouthowyouranahalfmarathon.
BPR-JordanHarbinger2016 Page 8 of 27
JordanH: Yeah.
DaveAsprey: WhenIescapedyouhavethisadrenalineandIrememberthistimewhereIwasfreakingoutalittlebit,andreallyyou'renotindangeriftheykidnapyouagain.Theyjustdropyouoff.Youhavenomoney,youhavenocellphone,youhavenowaytodoanything.Youjusthavetosociallyengineereverything.I'dmetwithoneoftheotherpeoplewhobeenkidnappedandwewereplottingandschemingtotryandstayfreeandtoruntheselittlemissions.ThisisinSantaMonica,whichisaprettynicepartoftownreally,butyou'restillscaredandyouhavenowaytogetacrosstown.Iwas,"Okay,Ithinktheyspottedme,"andIjusthightailedoutofthere.
WhenIfinallyhookedupwithpeopleIwassixmilesawayandIdon'tevenknowhowIgotsixmilesaway.Yougetthatadrenaline.Ihadalittlecostumewithme,aredknitcapandafakeponytail.Whatreallystoodoutformeisoneoftheguyswhohadmilitarytrainingwasokay.Ourjobwastogotalktotheguywearingtheblackhatatthebusstopandtwoofthepeopleatthebusstoparebountyhuntersandyoucanseethem.HowcanIrunthismission?I'mhidingandrunningawayandheshowshimselfwearingtheredhatandthentheycometochasehimandhegoesintoastore,he's,"Hey,canIgoouttheback?"Hegoesaround,doesthemission,andhe'stotallycoolandIwasabouttoshitmyself.
JordanH: Verycool.That'sagoodplan,right?Hedistractedthemandtheotherguystayedthere.
DaveAsprey: Itjusttookalevelofrationalstuff.Iwasalreadytooadrenalineandtoonotlogicaltoevenformulateaplan.IlearnedalotaboutmyselfthatwayandIdidn'thavetherealthreatoftorturelikeyouexperiencedoranythat,butitwasalearningexperienceformeinabigway.
JordanH: Itwasacoolcourse.I'lltellyou,IgotcaughtabunchduringthatclassandthereasonIgotcaughtabunch,Ithinkit'seasytoblameotherpeople,butIdidn'thaveagoodplanformostofmyhiding.IftheywerechasingmeIrememberItriedtowatchalittleleaguegameandthecoachwas,"CanIhelpyou?"Iwas,"I'mhidingfromafriendofmine."Hewas,"No,thisistooweird.Thisisalittleleaguegame,bro."IgotcaughtthenandIthoughtthatwasacoolplan.
Speakingoffitness,health,andnutrition,theyputmewiththisoneguy.TherewasabunchofFBIguys,therewasabunchofsecurityguys,policeofficers,andthentherewasonearm-chairprepperguy,andIthoughtforaprepper,"Listen,buddy,ifyou'repreparingfortheapocalypse,"hewasatleast100poundsoverweight.YouknowhowtheylockyouinthevanandthentheyleavethevantogotoHomeDepotorwhateveritisandyouescapethecuffsandyougetoutofthevan.Thisguywalkedmaybehalfamilewithmeataveryslowpacebeforebasicallyjusttappingout.Attheendofthecourse,Kevintoldme,hegoes,"Look,weknewthatwasgoingtohappenandyoudidbetterthanwethought
BPR-JordanHarbinger2016 Page 9 of 27
youweregoingdobecausetheequivalentofthisishavinganinjuryvictimorasmallchildwithyouwhojustcan'tkeepupthewholetime."
Iwouldgetcaughttryingtosavethisguyahalfdozentimesthroughoutthatcourse.ItwasfrustratingandeventuallyIstartedtogetalittleangryaboutit.ThenIthought,waitaminute,thisisthetestforme.NotcanIhidefrompeopleatajuicebarinSantaMonica.It'sgoingtobemuchmoreaboutcanIdealwiththepersonwho'sdraggingmedown?Becauseinareallifesituation,itwillbethefactthatthere'ssomebodywho'sgotaninjurylikemyfriendinSerbia,ormaybeyou'rewithyourwifeandshehasabustedankle.You'renotjustgoingtogetmadandyellatthatperson.Youhavetodealwiththat.Whatifit'saneight-year-oldkid?
Itwasareallygoodtestformetogothroughwithsomebodywhowasnotreadyforthisatall.
DaveAsprey: SomethingthatIdidn'tthinkwe'dgetintothisdetailon,butsomethingthatlistenerswillappreciatethatideaofhowdoyoumaintaincontrolofyourselfinanemergencylikethat?IlearnedatonjustbyrealizingIwasteamedwithsomeotherpeople,too,andit'sprettydarnemotionalwhenyournervoussystembelievesthatyouhaveathreattoyoursurvival.Rationallyyouknow,I'minSantaMonica,Ipaidtheseguys,there'snorealrisk,butitdoesn'tfeelthatwayatallandyoureallyquicklygetsuckedintoit.It'soneofmyfavoriteexperiencesforjustlookingatsympatheticactivation,fightorflightresponse,andjustrealizingyouthinkyou'reincharge,butyou'resonot.
JordanH: Yeah,onethingthatbroughtupformesortofparallelswhatyouwerejusttalkingaboutwiththesympatheticactivationafterthatclassIthoughtwhataboutpeoplewhoareontherunforamonthorayear?Yourlevelofadrenaline,youwouldwakemostdaysprobablygoing,"OhmyGod,okay,I'msafe.Wait,lookoutthewindow."Youwouldagetwiceasfasteasily,becauseyou'dbeactivatedthewholetime.Youradrenalglandswouldbeshot.Speakingofadrenalfatigueandentrepreneurs,imaginebeingonthelam.
DaveAsprey: Iwastryingtohidefromthesebountyhunters.IwalkedintooneentirestoreandIhadthisweirdknithatandthesesunglassesandtherewerethreepeoplestaringatme.Iwas,"Maybethey'rebountyhunters,oh,myGod.They'regoingtofindme."TheywerestaringatmebecausetheythoughtIwascelebrity.IwasclearlytryingtohidewhatIlookedlike.Whoisthatguy?Itwasjustsosurreal,butIwouldrecommendanyonelisteningifyouevergetachancetodooneofthoseclasseswhereyoureallypushyourlimitslikethat,it'snotaprepperthingitall,plusit'scooltoknowwhattodoifsomeone'sgoingtotrytokidnapyou.
JordanH: Yes.
DaveAsprey: Shortanswerisyoushouldnotgetinthecar,doeverythingpossible.Kicktheirass,makealotofnoise.Ifyougetin,you'reprobablygoingtodie.
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JordanH: That'sright.GavindeBeckerGiftofFearsaysnevergotothesecondarylocation.Whatthatmeans,andthat'sthethingthatessentially...IsawthatonOprahwhenIwaskidwatchingwithmymom.Nojudgments.IwasinthisMexicanfaketaxiandIremembergoing,"OhmyGod,we'retotallyonthewaytothesecondarylocation."FirstmistakewasgettinginthecarIthoughtitwasataxi.Whatareyougoingtodo?ThesecondmistakethatIavoidednarrowlywasmymindreallywantedtogo,"You'refine.He'skidnappingyou?No.Heprobablydoesreallyjustneeddirections."Thenyourotherlogicalbraingoes,"He'sacabdriverinMexicoCityandyouwantedtogodownnexttothepresidentialpalace.Ifhedoesn'tknowwherethatis,whataretheoddsofacabbyinWashingtonDCnotknowhowtogettotheWhiteHouse?Zero."
Ifhesaysheneedsdirectionsandyoufeellikesomethingelseisupandhewon'tletyououtandhewon'tturnaround,he'snotreallytakingyouwhereyouwanttogo.ThisisBS,you'rekiddingyourself.ThatwasthetriggerthatIneededalongwiththatadviceofnevergotothesecondarylocation.ThatwasthetriggerIneededtogo,okay,snapoutofit.It'snotjustgoingtobeokayifyouburyyourheadinthesandandlookoutthewindoworwhateverIwasdoing.That'swhatcausedmetotakeaction,andIthinkthatpossiblysavedmylife.Lookingbackonit,50/50chancewhetherornotIwasjusttakento15differentATMsandthendumpedoutwhenmycardfroze,orchoppedupintolittlepiecesandsold,Idon'tknow.Whoknows?Youneverknow.Youdon'treallywanttofindout.
DaveAsprey: Ihearyouhavesomereallynicekidneys,that'sallI'msaying.
JordanH: Yeah,they'reclean.Idrinkalotoftea,Istayhydrated.
DaveAsprey: Youtalkedaboutthisoverweightguywhoreallycouldn'ttakecareofhimselfwhenyouweredoingthattraining.Itturnsoutthatmorehalfofpeopleareobese.Iusedto100poundsheavier,soI'vedefinitelydealtwiththatandalotofmyworkishowdoyougetcontrolofyourbiologythatway,notjustthefightorflightresponse.TheNewYear'sresolutionthat'sNumber1,atleastitwasNumber1lastyear,wasloseweight,Iwanttoloseweight.YousearchGooglefordietandyou'llget146millionresults.Halfofwomenareonadietatanyonetime.Ninetypercentofdietersdon'tlosetheweighttheywanttolose,infacttheyusuallygainitbackbecauseofsomehormonalthingsthatI'vewrittenabout.What'syourrecommendationforsomeonewhowantstogettheirweightlossgoals?
JordanH: Sure.I'mnotaweightlossandfitnessexpert,soIjustwanttoqualifythat.
DaveAsprey: No,thisisaboutdoingwhatyouwanttodo,doingwhatyousayyou'regoingtodo,notaboutwhattechniquestouse.
JordanH: Okay,great.
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DaveAsprey: I'mnotsayingeatmorefatorwhatever.
JordanH: Right,yeah,becauseI'm...Idon'tknow.ThetruthofthematteriswheneverI'mtryingtochangeanyhabit,forexample,weightlossorotherwise,Ialwaystrytousemyownpsychologyagainstme.It'sabout,well,Ishouldn'tsayequalparts,equalpartsdoessoundclever.Equalparts,how'sthat,self-awarenessandputtinginsystemstouseyourownpsychologyagainstyou.Forexample,whenIwasrunningwhichInowdislike,strongdislike,butIcycleinstead,whatIwoulddoespeciallywhenIlivedinMichiganinsteadofCaliforniaanditwasfreakingfreezingoutsidemostoftheyear,Iwouldsay,"Allright,IwillgetoutofbedandIwillputonallmyworkoutgear,allmyrunninggear.IfIwanttogobacktobedafterthat,thenIcan."ThenafterthatIwouldusuallygorunning.
ThenwhenitgotreallyhardbecauseitwascoldashelloutsideandIknewit,orifthatstopsworkingbecauseIknowthattrickofputtingonyourclothes,gettingoutofbedandmakingithappen,thattrickmightstopworking,Iwouldgo,"Allright.I'mgoingtoputonallmystuffandthenstepoutontothefrontporchstepandfeelthatcoldairandtakethreedeepbreaths.ThenifIwanttogobacktobed,Ican."IkeptescalatingituntilIreprogrammedmybraintorealize,oh,runnershighissofunversusugh,gettingoutofbedsucks.Itwasavoidingthepainofnotgettingthatrunner'shighbecamegreaterthanthepainofgettingoutofbed.Thatwasacritical...
DaveAsprey: Youbecameanopiateaddictbasically.
JordanH: Basicallybecameopiateaddict,self-generatedopiateaddict.Iuselittlethingslikethisallthetimewhere,forexample,Iwantedtostartgettingupearlierandnotlike4:00a.m.crazystuff,butgettingupat6:00or7:00justlikeanormalproductiveperson.Areyouoneofthoseget-up-at-3:00-a.m.typeofpeople?
DaveAsprey: Arewetalkingaboutsociopathsorpsychopathsarelike?Theywakeupat3:00a.m.That'sjustallI'msaying.
JordanH: Really,ohgood.Well,Iwakeupat6:00or7:00,sometimes8:00,sowaylesspsycho.
DaveAsprey: You'remoreeven-keeler.ThisHalElrodguy[inaudible00:30:30],Idon'tknowtheseearly-morningpeople.Yougottolookatthem,they'realittlebitcrooked.Hal,Iloveyou,man.
JordanH: Ascants,yeah.Wecan'tpickonHalrightnow.He'sgoingthroughsomuch.
DaveAsprey: Ijusttextedhimthismorning,that'swhyI'mgivinghimashot.
JordanH: Man,he'stheoneguywhocangetcancerandeveryonegoes,"Ofcourse,nowyou'regoingtousethattoyouradvantage.Yougetallthebreaks,Hal."
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DaveAsprey: He's,"I'mgoingtokickitsass."
JordanH: Yeah,Halgetsallthebreaks.
DaveAsprey: Hedoesindeed.Bythewayifyou'relisteningandyoudon'tknowabout"MiracleMorning,"youshouldcheckitoutandpickuphisbookorgetintouchwithhim.Ifyouhaven'theard,Hal'sbeenreallypublicaboutit.Hehadarareformofleukemiaandistotallywinningitrightnow.HedoeswakeupreallyinthemorningwhichiswhyeventhoughIlikeHal,Ialwayskeeponeeyeonhimbecauseyouneverknowabouttheseearlymorningpeople.
JordanH: Howdidherarestformofleukemia?Hecouldn'tgetregularleukemia,Hal.Comeon,buddy.Alwaysgottobedifferent.Yeah,he'skickingitsbuttmorethatIknowforsure.WhatI'msayingwiththewakingupearlystuffasidefrompickingonHalwiththis,andIjustknowfromcollegedays,it'sreallyeasyformetolookattheclockat6:00andgo,"Well,Ididn'tgotobedearlyenoughlikeIthought,soI'mreallytired.Icanmovemystuffonmycalendararound,"blah,blah,andmakeallkindsofcrazygymnasticleapstonotgettingup.IstudiedChineseinthemorningandIhavetoschedulemylessonsaweekinadvance.IfIcancelone,Ican'tjustpushitanhour,IloseitanditcostsmemoneyandItakethemonSkype.
Ischeduledallofthoseforfirstthinginthemorning.Getup,don'tevenshower,justcrawlovertothecomputerandworkonSkype.WhatthatdoesiswhenIwakeupandIlookattheclockandIgo,"Oh,butI'msocomfortable,"Igo,"Well,doIwanttoloseaChineselessonandfeelguiltyaboutnotdoingthelesson,thensleepcrappilyforanother35minutesandthenget...No,that'sgoingtobeawful."Icreatedapainpointthatwasgreaterthanthepainpointofgettingoutofbed.Idothatinmanyareaswhenitcomestoeating,whenitcomestogettingupearly,whenitcametorunning.Creatingapainpointthatisgreaterthanthepainpointofinactioniskey.You'veprobablyheardthisamilliontimes,butseekingpleasureismuchloweronthescheduleofwhatyourbrainwillforceitselftodoversusavoidingpain.
Yourbrainprioritizesavoidingpainversusseekingpleasure.It'snotenoughtosayifIgetupandworkoutthismorning,I'llhaveacakelaterorwhateverorI'llwatchsomeNetflix.Itdoesn'tworkaswellasgoingyouaregoingtofacethefollowingconsequencesimmediatelybynotgettingup.Thatisthewaytodoit,notbyrewardwhichiscounterintuitiveforalotofpeople.
DaveAsprey: Ibecamea5:00a.m.riserfortwoyearsbeforeIhadkids.IdidthatjustbecauseIwanttodoit.IhavesincelearnedfromMichaelBreus,the"PowerofWhen,"who'sbeenaguestontheshow,therearefourdifferentchronotypesandIamthenightchronotypewhichhecallsawolfwheremyproductivetimeislateandit'snotbiologicallynormalformetogetupat5:00a.m.IdiditfortwoyearsandIwasjustmilitant.Thealarmgoesoffat5:00,itdoesn'tmatterwhattimeIgotosleep.EventuallyIstartedgoingtobedearlierbecauseIwasmoretired
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andIdidshift.I'dwakeupandmeditateeverymorninganditwasinmycasethepainof...Youfeelreallygoodwhenyoudobreathingexercises.IdidsomecalledArtofLivingwhichactuallyhasalotofsimilaritieswhatWimHofdoes,somedifferentarmpositionsbutreallyrapidcountedbreathsandthings.Yougethighfromthatinagoodway.Itrechargesyourday.
Thesamethingisthepainofnotgettingthatgoodcalmemotionalrecharge,becauseifIwokeuplaterthan5:00Iwouldn'thavetimetodoit,thatbecamethecornerstoneandIdidmakethehabitchange.NowIdon'tdothatanymorebecauseIdon'tthinkit'swhatworksgreatformybiology.Similarthingtowhatyoudid.Howdoyouapplythattosomeonewhosaidthey'regoingtoloseweightandthey'rewalkingdownthestreetandtheyseetheicecreamstore.They'reeithergoingtogoinorthey'renot.What'syourhabitchangeperspectiveonwhatyoucandoinsideyourheadatthatpoint?
JordanH: Idefinitelyusedtobethatguy.It'saveryindividualizedthingwithhabitchangeandweightloss,however,theprinciplesstillhold.ThewaythatItypicallydoanysortofeatingoutsideofwhatisprescribed,likerealhealthymealsandthefoodthatIchoseearlierwhenIwasn'tinanemotionalstate...Well,actually,letmebackup.IchoosefoodandmealsnotbasedonemotionalstatesunlessI'mwithfriendsandit'saweekendandwe'redecidingwe'regoingtogogetwhateverwewantbecausethat'swhatwe'redoing.Whatyoudon'twanttodoischoosewhatyou'regoingtoeatwhenyou'reinahungry,cranky,rushedemotionalstate.That'snotalwaysavoidable,butyoucanplanaroundit.
Insteadofwaitinguntildinnertimeandgoing,"Ugh,whatshouldwedofordinner?Let'sgetsomefriedchickenbecauseI'mhungryandIsmelledfriedchickenearlieranditstuckinmybrain."Youwanttohaveaplanforsomethingthatishealthythatisoutsideofthat.Thereasonthatyoucansticktothatplanisbecauseyou'vealreadysetupthelogistics.It'snotjustavagueplanthatyouhaveinyourhead.It'sgottobelogisticallyhandled.It'slikenothavingsnacksinthehouseornothavingcigarettesinthehouseorwhateverhabitsyou'retryingtobreak.Youneedtomakesurethatwhateveryouhavethatyouplantoeatiseitherinthehouseoronitsway.
Ifyoudesperatelyneedfoodandyouonlyhaveafewminutes,youneedtogoonPostMatesorwhateverserviceyouhave,ordersomethinghealthyandthenwhatIwouldnormallydoissay,"Look,ifyoustillwanttheunhealthyoptionafteryou'vehadthehealthystuff,knockyourselfout,gorightahead."That'sbeenveryusefulformeaswellifI'mwithabunchoffriendsandthey're,"Oh,we'regoingtogoeatthisicecream."Great,goaheadandeatalloftheicecreamthatyouwant.I'mjustgoingtohaveonebitefrommygirlfriendorsoon-to-bewife'sicecream,orwhatever.I'llhavethat,orwe'llsharethis.
Or,I'llgetthetinybabyportionwhereit'sahalfofonescooporevenjustthetasters.Oftenafteryougetthattasteyougo,"Yeah,Idon'treallywantthis.It'ssugary."Theproblemisifyoujustorderedadoublescoopofthat,youwilleat,
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ifyou'reanythinglikeme,you'lleatthewholethingbecausewell,it'sgoodandIpaidforandsoIdon'twanttowasteit.Ifyoueatthreetasters,IshouldsayifIeatthreetasters,thoselittlewoodtonguedepressorsbasicallythattheygiveyouwiththeicecreamonit,there'sa95%chancethatafterIhaveacoupleofthose,Igo,"Yeah,I'mgoodonthis.Igotthetaste,theemotionalneedwasfilled,soIdon'tactuallyneedtoconsumetheproductitself."Doesthatmakesense?
DaveAsprey: Itdoes,andthisiswhatpeopledon'tknow.FortwoyearsIworkedatBaskinRobbins31Flavorsscoopingicecream,andit'sguyslikeyouwhocomeinandgetsamplesanddon'tbuyicecream...No,I'mkidding.Iactuallydidworkat31Flavors,butIdon'thaveanyangertowardspeoplewhosampleandthenrunoutthedoor.It'sactuallykindoffunny.
JordanH: Ifitmakesyoufeelanybetter,BaskinRobbins,thereasonIdothatisbecauseatthatpointmywillpowerhasalreadybeenexhausted.That'sanimportantpointwithanyhabit,weightlossorotherwise.Thereasonthatyou'renotabletorelyonwillpowerisbecausewhenyoudecideI'mgoingtoeathealthythisweek,lookattheemotionalstateandthephysicalstatethatyou'rein.Youprobablyjustatesomethingthatwasn'tgoodfor.You'reatCheesecakeFactorysittingtheregoing,"Oh,man,wegottogetthecheck.I'mgoingtoeathealthyfortherestoftheweek."You'renotsayingthatwhenyou're,"Oh,man,Iskippedbreakfast,I'mstarving.Well,I'mgoingtoeathealthythisweek.IalreadysaidIwasgoingtodothat."Veryunlikely.
You'regoingtomakethosewillpowerpromiseswhenyouareinadifferentemotionalstateandyouhavetobeveryawareofthewaythatyoureactindifferentemotionalstates,whetherwe'retalkingabouthunger,whetherwe'retalkingaboutgoingtothegym,whetherwe'retalkingaboutsomesortofnervousticthatyoudowhenmaybeyoupickyoureyebrowsoryournailsorwhateverlittlenervousticspeoplehave,theydothisalotwhenthey'renervous.Youhavetobeawareofwhatemotionalstateyou'regoingtobeinbecauseyoucan'tjustsay,"I'mnotgoingtobitemynailsanymore."Youcan'tdothat.Youcanonlydothatwhenyouuseyourownpsychologyagainstyou,whichiscreatingthosepainpointsandrealizingthatyourwillpower,whetherornotit'sfiniteitdoesn'treallymatter.There'sdebatebackandforceonwhetherornotwillpower'sfinite,whetherit'snot.
DaveAsprey: Yeah,there'sdebate.
JordanH: They'rebackandforthonit,asyouknowmorethanIdo.Wecan'trelyonit.Thebottomlineisjustcan'trelyonitsoyouhavetousesystems.That'swhyforpeoplelikeme,Ibuiltarecordingstudioinmyhouse.It'sconvenient,butalsoitgetsmetodoit.There'sagymacrossthestreet.Isigneduptothatoneeventhoughit'sabigboxgym.Itdoesn'thaveallthestuffthatIwouldwant.There'speopletherethatsweatonthingsanddon'tcleanup.Itdoesn'tmatter.The
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pointisitisthereandit'sconvenientenoughandthat'smyusualgo-toexcuse,time,whichisiswhatmostpeoplehave.Itookthatexcuseawayfrommyself.
Thesesystemsareallaboutcreatingpainpointsandtakingawayyourownexcuses,becauseeventuallyyouwillrunoutoftheeasyexcusesandthenyoustarttorealize,well,Idon'treallyhavetimetogo.Well,thegym'sacrossthestreet.Well,it'stooexpensive.No,it'snot.It's$29amonth.Okay,well,letmethinkofanotherreason.Oh,mygymshoesarestilldampfromyesterdaysoIcan't...No.Okay,thenyou'regoingtogetanotherpairofgymshoes.Oh,well,mypantsareinthewash...Youjusthavetocontinuetotakeexcusesawayfromyourselfsuchthatwhenyoustartgoingthroughtheexcuseprocess,you'veeliminatedallofthetopexcusesandthenyoucatchyourselfinthemiddleofthatexcuse-makingprocess.
Yougo,allright,wellit'scloseenoughsoIhavetime.I'vealreadypaidthemembership,it'snotexpensive.IcangeteverythingtheredonethatIwant.Itmightbecrowded,butIhavealternateworkoutplanstousethemachinesthatnobody'sgoingtouseifIgothereandtheracksarefull,whichisanotherexcuse.Thenifyou'retryingtothinkyourwayaroundthoseexcuses,itusuallytakesenoughtime,andI'mtalkingaboutafewseconds,whereyougooh,I'mdoingthatthingwiththeexcusesagainwhereI'mnotgoingtodothisparticular.JustlikeIwaswhereIwasnotdoingmyChinesestuffbecauseoh,I'msobusy.It'sno,it'sscheduled,it'sfirstthinginthemorning.There'sneveranythingoverthatotherthansleep,soIactuallyhavetogetupanddoit.
Ifyoucreatethosesystems,youcreatethosepainpointsandyoustarttosystematicallytakeexcusesoffthetable,you'llstarttodoalotmore.Youhavetodoallofthosethings.Youhavetodoallthreethingsinconjunctionoryouwon'tactuallygethabitchange.You'llfigureoutawayarounditbecausethepainpointoftakingactionwillstillbegreaterifthepainpointisnotinplace.Doesthatallmakesense?
DaveAsprey: Itmakeswonderfulsense,andwhatyou'redescribingthereisegoawareness.It'syouregothatmakesupallthoseexcuses.
JordanH: Yes.
DaveAsprey: WhenIdothe[inaudible00:41:59]neurofeedbackprogramwithclients,thewholethingislikeusingaliedetectorthattheneurofeedback,well,notthewholething,butabigparttobecomeawarethatwherethoseinnerexcusescomefromandthenchangetheprogrammingthatmakesthemhappen.Iwasamazedatmyabilitytomakeupexcuses,justmypowersofself-deceptionareinfinite.Samething,ifyoumakeitconvenient,youbuildthosesystems.Iloveyouradvicethereforweightloss.
YoutalkaboutsystemsalotinTheArtofCharm.There'sthingslikegettingthingsdone,GTD,theactionmethod,thePomodoroTechnique,JerrySeinfeld's
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favoritecalleddon'tbreakthechain.Whatdoyouusetostayorganizedsothateveryonewillbenefitfromthis?
JordanH: Yeah,Idogetatonofemailfrompeoplethatsaythingslike,okay,howdoyoudoallthis?EvenwhenIhangoutwithpeoplethatyouandIprobablybothknow,likeCEOsofIguessyou'dcallcorporations,akacompaniesthatdon'tusuallydoallthebusinessfromtheirhouseortheirhouseinonetinyoffice.TheseCEOsaregoinghowthehelldoyoudosomuch?ThetruthisIhavesomefancy-schmancytoolsandtactics,butIalsohavesomenot-so-fancytoolsandtacticsthatmostpeopleunder-utilizelikecrazy.ThefirstthingthatIwilltellyouandthisiswherepeopleare,"Oh,comeon."ThecalendarismagicalandImeanpeopleusethecalendarinthewrongway.
Thewaythatmostpeopleuseacalendaristheygo,"Oh,yourcousin'sweddingisinMay.Allright,putitonthecalendar,"andtheygowritethatinthere.Thentheygo,"Oh,thisweekend,weshouldgotothezoo."Allright,thenmaybetheywritethatonthecalendar.Thenthat'sprettymuchit,ortheywritegotothegym4:00p.m.andthat'stheonlythingontheircalendarandeverythingelseisblank.Here'stheproblem.Whenyou'reanentrepreneurorwhenyou'rerunningabusinessorwhenyou'rejustareallybusyparentwithtwokidsorsomethinglikethat,youcan'tjustputthethingsthatareaspirationalormulti-dayaffairsonthecalendar.
ThewaythatIdoitisIputeverythingonmycalendarbrokeninto15-minuteblocks.Thewaythatitlooksis,andI'mgoingtolookatmyowncalendarrightnowjusttonothavetocreatethingsfrommemoryhere.IfIlookatTuesdaythe29th,there'sthingsontherelikegetRMAformforthisdevicethathadtoreturn.Chineselesson.RecordadvertisementsforTheArtofCharmpodcast.Record[inaudible00:44:30]Mondays.Emailscheduleandthere'sthreerandomguestnamesinthere.There'sshowerisonthere.Thenthere'saphonecallandanotherphonecallandanothercall,all15-minuteblocks.There'salunchblockontheresoIcangetsomesanity,somerecording.Somebody'sinterviewingme.Abikeride,that'sonthere.CheckingmyequipmenttogoportablebecauseIwasgoingdowntoLAtointerviewPeterDiamandisfromXPrize.
DaveAsprey: Oh,IlovePeter.Hewroteablurbonmylastbook.
JordanH: Yeah,yeah.
DaveAsprey: AreyoutherefromAbundance360?
JordanH: IwasandIwasinterviewingatXPrize.Ihaveheard...It'sfunny,Ijustgotanemailaboutthat.
DaveAsprey: I'llbethere.I'mmakingcoffeeforeveryone.
JordanH: Nice,yeah,thatshouldbeareallygoodconference.
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DaveAsprey: Ihighlyrecommenditforpeoplewhoarelistening.Ifyou'reintothefutureoftechandtheworld,Peter'sagoodguy,Abundance360conference.
JordanH: Theotherthingsthatareonthereareallsimilar.Asyoucansee,mycalendarisloadedwiththingsthatmostpeoplewouldneverputontheircalendar.Here'stheproblem,mostpeoplego,"Well,IcanrememberthefewphonecallsthatIhavetodo."Or,"They'reinmyemailinbox."Or,"They'reonmytodolist."Evenifthey'remoreorganized-ishandtheyhaveato-dolistandthey'recheckingthingsoff,theproblemisifthingsarenotplannedoutinspaceandtime,theywon'thappen.Ato-dolistisjustabunchofmagictricksthatwilloccuroutsideofthespacetimecontinuumatsomepointpossibly,right?Whatweknowispeoplehavecrapontheirto-dolistthat'slikewritebook.What?No.Dooutlinefornextbook.That'sathree-dayprocess,notsomethingyousqueezeinwhileyou'rewaitingforyourkid'skaratelessontofinishinaparkinglot.
YouhavetoputthisstuffintothecalendarbecausewhatthatallowsyoutodoissayIcancrossthatoffmyto-dolistbecauseit'sgettingdoneat9:00a.m.onTuesday.Iknowwhatpeoplearegoing,"Idon'tevenknow,myday'ssoflux,Ican'tputthingsdownonthecalendar."That'sfine.Youshouldstillplanitandputitonthecalendar,andthenifithastomove,you'veguesstimatedtheamountoftimethatthisisgoingtotakeandyoushufflethatblockaroundinthecalendar.Whatyoufindisthatthose20phonecallsthatyouneededtomakeoverthenextmonth,ifyou'removingthoseinandoutofyourworkschedule,yourgymschedule,yourkids'schedule,yourdinnerandeatingyourfoodandyourChineseorwhateverthehellyou'redoingschedule,yourealizeholycrap,Ican'tdothese20phonecallsuntiltheendofthemonthorthenextmonthorsomethinglikethis.Youstarttonotonlyfigureouthowmuchtimeyourtasksaregoingtotake,youstarttoactuallyknockthembecausethey'replanned.
What'sonthecalendargetsdoneandthingsthataren'tonthecalendar,theydonotgetdone.Yousaynotothosethings.Yousaynotospontaneousrandommeetings.Sinceyou'removingthingsfromyourto-dolisttoyourcalendar,whichthatdoesforyouaswellisitstartstoshowyouhowlittletimethatyouhave.Weallknowwedon'thaveenoughtime,butit'sonethingtobeabletoshowyourselftomorrowyoureallydon'thavetime.Becauseifyousay,"Sure,I'lldoalunchmeeting,"andyougothereandittakesanhourandahalfinsteadofanhour,yourealizeinthatmomentthatyouscrewedup.Ifyou'vegotitblockedoffandyourealizeyouonlyhaveahalfanhourforlunchthatday,yourealizeyouhavetosaynotothatmeeting,anditforcesyoutore-prioritize.
Usingthecalendarinthiswayforcesyoutonotkeepahugeto-dolistbecausethey'retakingupactuallyfiniteamountsofworkingandwakingandlivingspaceinyourbrainandinyourcalendar.Italsomakessurethatyoumovethingsaroundtogetthemdone.Italsomakessurethatyoucanprotectyourtimeagainstpeoplethatareintrudinganditforcesyoutore-prioritize.Ifyou'renotusingacalendarinthisway,you'reprobablydealingwithabunchofcrappy
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problemsthatareveryavoidable.Iusedtobethatguywhowouldwakeupwhenever,dowhateverworkIneededtodowheneverIneededtodoitduringtheday.
WhatIfound,andthisisinmy20s,evenstartingTheArtofCharmandtheshowandeverythingwasyeah,youstartworkaround2:00afterlunchandafterthegymandthenyoustopworkingaround5:00becausepeoplecomeoverandyou'relikeyeah,whatever.Yougettwoorthreehoursofworkdoneadayinsteadof10.Overtimethatstacksup.
DaveAsprey: It'salife-changingthing.Mycalendarlooksjustlikeyours.Ifthere'sanyself-care,likeamIdrivingmykidstoschoolthatmorning,allofthethings,everylittlethingisonthere.Mylunch,ifitisn'tscheduled,Iwon'teatlunch.I'vetrainedmywifeifit'snotonmycalendaritdoesn'texist.Bytheway,don'taskmetoremember.Idon'tkeepmyto-dolistinmyheadbecauseit'sinmycalendarandIdon'thaveato-dolist.It'sallinmycalendar.IscheduleitwhenIsayI'mgoingtodoit.Ihaveateamofadventswhohelpmedothisnowbecauseit'sreallystacked,butI'mgrowingacompany,awriteNewYorkTimesbestsellers,Ihaveatopradioshow.It'smorethanonepersonissupposedtobeabletodo.It'sbecausenominutegetswastedduringthedayanditalsomeansit'shardforpeopletokeepupbecausehowisthatpossible?It'sbecauseIdon'tdoanythingthatI'mnotuniqueatdoing,andeverylittlethingisonthecalendar.
I'msohappyyousaidthatinsteadofgoingintooneofthosetechniques.Iwasagetting-things-doneguyandingettingthingsdoneyouspendalotoftimefilingthingsbecausethereisarationalfearifeverythingisn'twhereIcanfind,thenI'llprobablymisssomething,andifImisssomething,itcouldbearallybadand,therefore,there'sastressresponse.Youmanagethestressresponsebyfilingthings.IfoundjustonedayIwokeup,I'mwait,I'mspendingalotoftimefilingthingsIdon'treallycareabout,andIhaveasearchfunctioninmyemail.Idon'tfileanythinganymoreandittotallysetmefree.IputtheimportantstuffonmycalendarandeverythingelseI'llsearchbykeywords.IfIcan'tfindsomething,Iprobablydidn'tneedthatmuch.IfIreallyneedit,itmighttakemetwohourstofinditintheveryworstcase.That'snotgoingtohappenanditneverdoes.
JordanH: Yeah,there'salotofpeoplethatyouandIbothknow,I'msure,thatspendhoursorthey'vegotitdowntoasystemnow,butit'sstillwaytoomuchtimefilingemailsindifferentfolders.TheirfinderontheirMacorwhateverhas8,000differentfolders.Youdon'tneedthatanymorebecausethesearchfunctions,infact,they'redesigningOSsnowsothatyoudon'tneedtofilethingsandthatitdoesitintelligentlyforyou.Evenonyourphone,here'ssomethingInoticedyesterday.Iwasn'tpayingattention,butmyfriendsaid,"Oh,what'syourfiancelooklike?Inevermether."Iwas,oh,myGod,that'sright.It'sneverworkedoutinthepastfewyearsforthemtomeet.HowdoIfindapictureofJenny?
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WhatIdidisIlookedatmyphoneandIsawatabthatsaidpeople.Iwas,oh,Idon'tthinkIhavefoldersforpeoplebecauseitseemslikeahugewasteoftime.It'sgotfacerecognition,itfindspeople.It'sfunnybecauseit's,Iguess,maybenotbetabutit'snotperfect.IthasJennywithabikehelmetfolderandJennywithoutabikehelmetandsunglasses.Thenit'sgotmeandsomepeoplewholookalotlikemewhowealwaysjokelookalotlikeme.It'sgreatanditgetsitmostlyright,butitcan'ttellmycatsapart,forexample.It'sgreatbecauseIcouldhavespenthoursoverthepastfewyearsfiguringoutthisisapictureofJenny,Ibettertagit.Itdoesn'tmatter.They'retryingtofigureouthowtodoallthatforyoubecausetheyknowthatyou'retheexceptionwhenyou'retheonewhodoesitmanually.
Searchingforfilesonyourcomputer,searchingforemailisthewaytodoit.People,especiallyCEOsandhighperformerswillalsogetreallyhunguponbeingorganized.Iagreethatorganizationinsomewaysisimportant,likethiscalendarisgreatorganizationinmyopinion.It'sanexampleofgreatorganization.Havethingsdeclutteredonyourdeskisorganization.MakingsurethateveryreceiptyoueverhaveisemailedtoyouandthenputinaseparateGmailfolderisnotorganization.It'sbusywork.Thewaytotellthedifferenceistoaskifsomethingsavesyoutimerightnoworcostsyoutime?
ThemistakethatalotofpeoplemakeistheygohavingallmyreceiptsinoneplacewillsavemetimeifIevergetauditedbytheIRS.Ah,butit'snotsavingyoutimerightnow,soyou'respendingtheamountoftimethatitwouldtaketofindeverythingifyougetauditedbytheIRS.You'redoingallofthattimeinvestmentnowforsomethingthathasaverylowprobability,alowlikelihoodofeverhappening.That'sabadinvestmentbecausetheconsequencesofnothavingthatstufffiledisthatyouthenhavetodoexactlywhatyou'vespentthelastthreeyearsofyourlifedoing.Theconsequencesisnotlifeanddeath.
Ifyou'remilitaryyouplanforacontingencyifthey'rereally,reallylowlikelihoodanditstillcostsyouabilliondollarsbecauseyeah,yougottomakesurealienscan'tattackorwhateverthehellcontingencythey'recomingupwith.Ifyou'retalkingaboutorganizationalstuff,ifyou'retalkingaboutgettingaudited,ifyou'retalkingaboutcreatingfoldersonyourdesktopsothatwell,ifIeverneedtogivemycomputertomyassistantIcantellherhowtofindsomething,peoplewillfindexcusesforthisbusywork.I'llbehonest,whatyourassistant'sgoingtodoispushtheoptionspacebarthingtopullupthesearchandsay,"Whatdoyouthinkthatfile'scalled?"Yougo,"Idon'tknow,likebusinesslettertemplate.""Oh,hereitis."
Itdoesn'thavetobesevennestedfoldersdeep.That'syourOCDbusyworkthat'sbeenreallygoodforyouwhenyouwereinschool.Itwasgreatincollege,butnowintheageofcomputerswehavetoletgoofalotofthatstuff.Iknowpeoplearegoingwellifmycomputersearchfails,I'mgoingtohaveitallinnestedfolders.You'rejustplanningforacontingencythatisanultra-lowlikelihoodofeveryhappening.Youhavetoaskyourself,isthatworththe
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upfronttimeinvestment?Theanswerisalmostalwaysno.Theanswerisalwaysno.
DaveAsprey: Couldnoagreemore.Itsetsyoufreetodoalotmoreimportant,meaningfulstuff.Formethere'sreallytwothingsIwanttodowiththetime.I'meithergoingtogoplaywithkidsandbewithwifeanddofamilystuff,orI'mgoingtogodosomethingthatIthinkhasthemostimpactonchangingtheworld,changingthelivesofmillionsofpeople,likedisruptingbig,badprocessedfoodandthingslikethat.Filingsomething,itjustdoesn'tmatter.WhatIdowithreceipts,IknowImisssomeofthemandthesystemIworkwith,whichisreallyhelpful,butIwillnottouchittwice.Tome,that'sawasteoftime.IfI'msomewhereandthere'sareceiptthatmightbeabusinessexpense,Idon'twanttogetPBLoverfingerswhichisendocrinedisruptinganyway.Theycoatallthosereceiptwiththisnastychemicalthatbasicallymimicsestrogen.
JordanH: Youhaveyourwifehandleit?Herehoney,youtakethis.
DaveAsprey: Igetthereceiptatthecounter,Itakeapictureofit,andIgo,"Here,Idon'tneedit."ItouchitonceandItakethephoto.Idon'tknowifIemailallthephotostomyassistant.Ifsheneedsoneshe'llprobablytellme,butthey'reinmyphotothingsomewhere.IfIevergetauditedI'msureIcouldfindit.ThebottomlineisIdidn'thavetoputitinmywallet.Ineverhadtotouchitagain.Ididn'thavetostraightenoutthereceiptandscanit,noneofthatcrap.Youcouldnotpaymeenoughtodothat.
JordanH: Wedowalletaudits.WhenIgooutwithanentrepreneurbuddy,andyou'reprobablynext.WhenIseeyouatMastermindTalks,we'lldoawalletaudit.IdidthisNoahKagan.Idon'tknowifyou'refamiliarwithhim.
DaveAsprey: Yeah.No,it'scool.
JordanH: Thisishisidea.I'mnottryingtotakecredit,butwebasicallyvictimizeeverybodyatthetableandwedowalletaudits.YouknowthatSeinfeldwhereGeorgeCostanza's,"It'sapersonalfilingsystem,"andhiswallet'sthatthick?Wedothatandwefindoutandwetalklogicallyabouteverythingthat'sineveryone'swallet.Peoplehavefrickinglibrarycardsinthere.I'm,"Youhaveinternetright?Whendoyougotothelibrary?"They're,"Oncewithmykids.Igoonceamonth.""When'sthelasttimeyouwent?""Um,June.""Oh,really,June?""Yeah,of2015."You'relike,"Getthatthingoutofthere."Youenduptakingoutcards,well,thisismybusinesscard,thisismypersonalcard.Great,noproblem.Youcangetthingslikecoinorwhatever,butyoukeeponeortwocardsinthere.
Peoplego,"Well,IhavethisVisajustincasethisotheronedoesn'twork."I'm,"Look,man,you'vegotApplePayonyourphone,yougotyourcardsavedinonepasswordencryptedsoifpeoplewantyourmoneytheycanrunthatcardmanually."IgotoChipotleandIgo,"Oh,myGod,Idon'thavemywallet.Here'smynumber."Theycanenterthatthinginmanually.Almosteverymerchant
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anywherecandothat.Youdon'tneedthreebackupcreditcards.WedotheseauditsandI'lltellyou,wegetridofstacksandstacksandstacksofcardsinthewallet.Itsoundslikenobigdealbecausewhocaresyougotathinnerwallet,butthere'smultiplebenefitsfromthat.
One,you'renotmakingasmanydecisionswhichpaymentmethod,howareyougoingtofilethis,wheredoyouputthis,isthisbusiness,isthispersonal,istherepoints-activatedonthis?Youdon'thavetoworryaboutthat.Youalsodon'thavetoworryaboutkeepingthingsaround.Likeyousaid,youcandodigitalmostofthetime.Thisisprobablysomethingyou'vecovered,butIactuallywenttoadoctorbecausemyhipsweresotightandscrewedupandmyrighthipwaswayworse.Theysaid,"Well,howareyousitting?"Igo,"Well,I'mambidextroussoit'sreallythatonefoot'salwaysinfrontoftheother."Theygo,"Wheredoyoukeepyourwallet?"Igo,ohsnap,Ikeepmywalletinmyrightfrickingrearpocket,andthewholetimeI'msittingdown,I'vegotaninchandahalf-
DaveAsprey: Wedgebasically.
JordanH: Wedgeunderneathoneofmybuttcheeksandmyhipflexorsandmyspinehadtoovercompensateforthat.Igotarealhealthproblemfromhavingtoomanyfrickingcardsinmywallet,it'sarealthing.
DaveAsprey: Igottotellyouifpeoplelisteningtotheshowonlytookonepieceofadvisefromthewholeshow,nevercarryyourwallet,evenifit'sthin,inyourbackpocket-
JordanH: Frontpocketonly.
DaveAsprey: Oratleastneversitonit.Putitinyourfrontpocket.It'shardertopick-pocket.It'shardertoslashandsteal,butmostimportantly,yourspinewillcurveifyousitonawedgeoverandoverbecauseyourbuttandyourmolarsbasicallycontrolthecurvatureofyourspine.Ifeitherofthemhasanimbalance,you'renotgoingtolikehowyourbodyfeels.It'ssuchaneasything,butyeah,ifyouhave15creditcardsyou'renotgoingtolikeitevenmore.
JordanH: Yeah,thewalletauditthingwasafunproductivitything.ItwasweirdhowIremembertakingitoutofmyrearpocket.I'vebeengoingbackandforthfromfrontpockettorearpocketforyears.I'lltellyou,mostpeopledon'tlikethewayitlooksintheirfrontpocket,whatever.Theseentrepreneursweresaying,andIwassayingthenextday,how'syourback?Peoplewerelikeyounowwhat?Thisisthefirstdaymybackhasn'tbeensoreinthreeyears.I'm,"It'syourstinkingwallet."Peopledon'tbelieveitbecausethey're,"Butthechairissoftandmywallet'sonlyahalfaninchthick."Itjustdoesn'tmatter.Itwasshockingtofindouthowmanypeoplehavelifealteringproblemsfromkeepingastupidleatherfoliointheirbackpocket.It'sridiculous.
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DaveAsprey: Ithastobethebestbiohacktotalkabout,likechangingtheenvironmentaroundyousoyouhavecontrolofyourbiology.How'sthis,don'tsitcrookedallthetime.It'ssosimple,itabsolutelymatters.ThetrickforthewalletinthefrontthatIuse,Ijusthaveabigtubular-shapedwalletandsoIcarrythatinfront.Itsolvestheproblem.
JordanH: Itlookslikeacucumber,right?Yourollupallyourmoneyandyouputitinthere.
DaveAsprey: It'stopromotethevegandiet.It'sokay.Allright.We'recomingupontheendoftheshowandIgottoaskyouthesethreethings.Long-timelistenersthinkI'mgoingtoaskyouthe[inaudible01:00:00]question,butthisisn'tit.IwanttoaskyouhowwouldyouuseTheArtofCharmtogetoutofaspeedingticket?
JordanH: Idon'tgetoutofalotofspeedingticketbecauseIdon'tspeedthatmuch,butI'vetaughtthisandI'vedonethisabunch.IwasgoingtosayIdothisabunch,butmaybeseveralyearsago.Thewaythatyoudothis,youcanmemorizethesestarsandbarsandifyoujustgoogle...Infact,I'mgoingtotrytofindyouasitewiththisandI'llonlyspendasecondonit.There'simagesthatIusedforawhile.Theproblemisyoucan'tjustgooglestarsandbarsbecauseyouendupwithunionjacks,butifyoulookformilitaryrankingchartorsomethinglikethat...Yeah,hereitis.There'stonsofimagesaboutthis.Postoneupsomeplaceandyou'llfindthatyoucanlookatthingslikethebarsandthelittlechevronsthatofficershave.Ifyougreatthemusingthat,theyoftenfeel...Thisisjustpureandsimplelikeattractslikecomradery.
Youcansay,"Hi,Sergeant,whatcanIdoforyou?"Letthemassumethatyouknowcopsoryou'refromacopfamily.Ioftenwillgetasked,"Oh,areyouanofficeraswell."Isay,no.Thisisagreatjumping-offpointwhereandIdon'tlieaboutthis.Idoactuallyvolunteerforthis,butIgo,"No,IjustvolunteeratalotofpoliceathleticleagueeventsandIdonatetomylocalPDwhenitcomestothiskindofstuff,andhell,IliveinaweirdneighborhoodsoIcallthecopsalotandIfigureImightasknowwhereyouguysstandonthetotempole."I'msayingthistongueincheekandthey'reoftenlike,"Well,thenyoubecarefuloutthere."
Iteachthisbecausetherankingthingandthengivingthemareason.Becausehere'swhatmostpeopledo.Theygo,"Oh,IdonatealotorIvolunteeralot.I'magoodperson,"andtheytrytoconvincethecopnottodothis.Ortheyactlikeindignantaboutit.Obviously,thatwon'twork.Ortheyactemotionalandtheyplayvictim.Copsaresousedtothisthatit'sjustsoplayedout.Infact,Iknowalotofguysandgirls,officersofthelaw,whoreallyresentitifsomebodyjuststartscryingbecausetheyknowthey'rebeingmanipulated.Evenwhensomeonesays,"Myhusband'sgoingtobesoupset."They're,"Oh,isheabusivephysicallytoyou?"Ifthey're,"Well,no."They're,"Wellthensuckitup,honey."Ifit'sabigproblemthenit'sabiggerproblemthatneedssolving.
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Usually,theyjustcutrighttothechaseandit's,"No,Iknowyou'recryingbecauseyouthinkI'mgoingtofeelbadforyou."I'venoticedmyfemalecopfriends,theyjustwanttoclawpeoplewhentheydothat.Talkaboutbeinginamasculineprofession.Theydon'twanttoseethiskindofcraphappen.Ifyoumemorizetheranksandyouengagetheminthatkindofsortoffriendlyway,theyopenthedoorforthat.It'sfine.I'lltellyou,youknowwhat?Eventhenyou'relookingat50/50speedingticket,andcopsaredoingtheirjob.There'snomagictricktogettingoutofaticket.Anybodywhosays,"Oh,IdothisthingeverytimeandIgetoutofaticket,"they'rejustlying.Copsaresupposedtogiveyouaticket,andfranklyifyou'respeedingabunch,youdeserveone.
Talkaboutsettinguppainpointstocreatedifferenthabits,that'swhatthey'redesignedtodo.They'renegativeincentives.Ifyougettheminagoodmood,theyfeelalittlesenseofcomraderyandtheyopenthedoortoyoutalkingaboutsomethingthatyou'vedoneideallyforthem.Frankly,onthattoken,gooutandvolunteerforabunchofcopstuffbecauseifyougetpulledoverbysomebodywhoyouwerejuststandingnexttoatthebakesaleortheturkeydaytrotthing,thatwillgetyououtofaticketmuchmorethananythingI'dteachrightnoweverwould.
DaveAsprey: Goodpoint,healthyrelationships.MyfavoritepoliceexperiencewassomewhereinsouthernCaliforniaoutinthemiddleofthedesert.IgotpulledoverandIwasreallyrespectfulandnice,justnonreactive.Iendedupgettingtheticket,butheknockeditdownfromwhateveritwastowhatever,someotheramount.Attheendofithejustlookedatme,hegoes,"You'reareallynicemanandheshookmyhand."Allright,that'sawin.It'ssortoflikepeopledon'tactthiswaywhenyougivethematicket,whatthehell?Myviewonthesethingswhichtookmeoutoftheangerandfightorflightmodeisticketsareadrivingtax.Themoreyoudrive,themorethechanceyouhavegettingaticket.It'ssetupthatwayandthecopsarejustdoingtheirjob.They'rejustrevenueenforcement.
It'sokay.Iwouldratherthattheyjustincreasemygastaxatthepumpbytwocentsandwedidn'thavetodothewholespeedingdancethingandpeoplearereallyspeeding.It'snothowitis,soyoujustacceptthat.Yougohow'sitgoing?I'mhappytopaymydrivingfeeforthisyear.AllthepainwentawayandthenIwasabletobemorecalm.ThenIthinktheyfeelthatandthenthey'renicertoyouandyou'renicertothemanditworks.
JordanH: Yeah,there'ssomethingtobesaidoutthereforunderstandingwherepeoplearecomingfrom.BeingacopisajobIjustwouldn'tbeabletodealmyselfjustbecauseit'ssodangerous.Itforcesyoutolookattheworldinatotallydifferentway.Anythingyoucandotoshowthatyouunderstandthatworldalittlebitwillgoalongway.Willitgetyououtofaticket?Hopefully,not,actuallybutitshouldgetyou...Maybeyou'llbeonly10underinsteadof15or10overinsteadof15.
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DaveAsprey: Thereyougo.NowIdowanttoaskyou.Iwasgoingtoaskthreequestions,butwe'recomingupontheendoftheshow.IwanttoaskyoutheBulletproofquestionwhichisifsomeonecametoyoutomorrowandsaidIwanttokickmoreassateverythingIdo,Iwanttobebetterateverything,whatarethethreemostimportantpiecesofadviceyouhaveforme?Whatwouldyoutellthem?
JordanH: Itwouldbefocusonyourrelationshipsandthereasonisbecauseyoucannotdowhatanentirearmyofpeoplecando.Youcan'tlearnonyourownthewayyoucouldbetaughtbyotherpeoplewhoareexpertsandknowledgeableinanyfield.Youcan'tmeettheamountofpeoplethat10friendsofyourscanmeet.Ifyou'refocusingonyourrelationshipsandyou'reworkingreallycloselywithhelpingotherpeoplegetwhattheywant,thelawofreciprocitywillshowthemtowardshelpingyougetwhatyouwant.That'sanoldZigZiglartype,maybeevenBrianTracy,somesortofoldschoolwisdomthere.Thewaythatwedothisisby,andI'llbereallyspecificwiththefocusonyourrelationships,Icangiveyouthreepointsthatshouldcoveryouhere.
OneisABG,soinsteadofABC,alwaysbeclosing,it'sABG,alwaysbegivingoralwaysbegenerous.WhatImeanbythatisifyouwritetomeandyousayhey,doyouknowhowIcangetafasterserverformyshow?IwillmakeanintroductionofanotherpersoninmynetworkandIwilldothatfreely.Iwillmakeseveralintroductions.Youhavetodothat.Alotofpeoplethink,well,that'sacraptip.That'snotarealtip.You'dbesurprisedhowmanypeoplewillthinkwell,Ican'tdoanythingwithyourserver,soIreallydon'tknowandtheygiveup.OrIseealotofthisinnetworkingcirclesandentrepreneurcircles,oh,Ireallyneedagraphicdesigner,andthere'sawholetierofpeoplethatgo,"Well,I'mnotagraphicdesignersoIcan'treallyhelp."
It'sallaboutfiguringouthowtoplugpeopleinyournetworkintoeachotherbecauseifyouhavetodotheworkyourself,you'regoingtogo,"Ugh,doIhavetimeforthis?DoIwanttohelpthisperson?DoIhavetheexpertise?"Itdoesn'tmatter.It'sscalableifyou'rejustconnectingpeopletoeachother.Youcouldsend150emailsadaycreatingrelationshipswithtwodifferentpeopleandyou'ddothatbeforedinner,butyoucanonlyhelpacertainsmallnumberofpeopleyourself.YouwanttoABG,alwaysbegiving,andlookingforopportunitiestogivetootherpeople,especiallyifthatopportunityandthatgivingisjustanintroductiontosomebodyelseinyournetwork.Superpowerfulandsuperscalable.
DaveAsprey: Igottosaythatalwaysbegivingthing,justintheconversationofthisofhelpingothers,youandIjusttalkedaboutPeterDiamandis,wetalkedaboutHalElrod.We'vementionedotherpeople,thesamething.There'snobusinessrationalefordoingit.Goodpeople,yousendattentiontogoodpeopleandthatisahugepieceofadviceandit'soneIdon'thearveryoften.I'veheardthisquestionansweredabout350times.Ilovethatyouchosealwaysbegiving.Justbeing
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generouswithoutexpectingsomethinginreturnissofundamentalsothankyouforsharingthat,man.
JordanH: Yeah.Iappreciateyourappreciation.Thesecondtierofthatisdon'tkeepscore.ThisiswheretheABGpeople...MostpeoplewilleithernotABGinthefirstplace.Mostpeoplearelookingforwhattheycangetfromit.Evenifyou'reABGornot,thekeepingscorethingwillbitepeopleinthebutt.Here'swhatthiswouldlooklike.Hey,Jordan,weshoulddoashowonmynewbookcomingoutinApril,andIdon'tknowifyouhaveanewbookcomingoutinApril,sodon'tgetyourhopesup,Bulletprooffans.Idon'tknowwhenthenewonecomesout.
DaveAsprey: Bytheway,Aprilismybook[crosstalk01:08:54]
JordanH: Isitreally?
DaveAsprey: Yeah,goodcall,man.
JordanH: Wow[crosstalk01:08:58]
DaveAsprey: [Crosstalk01:08:59]developpsychicpowers,Igotcha.
JordanH: Yeah,noworries.We'lltalkaboutthatonthenextshow.I'llsaysure,I'dlovetopromotethat,Ithinkit'dbereallyfun.I'llhelpyouwithyourlaunch.Whatyoushouldnotthendoisgo,yeah,alsoI'dliketocomebackonBulletproofinAprilandyoushouldmailitoutinyournewsletterandblah,blah,blah.Ifpeoplewanttohelpyou,letthatbeacompletelyindependentaction.Don'tturnitintoatransaction,becausewhatyoudowhenyoukeepscoreistwodifferentthings.OneyouendupturningwhatshouldjustbeIlikehelpingpeople,IlikehelpingmyfriendsorIlikemakingfriends,intotransactionalrelationshipswherethey'rethenafraidtoaskyouforanythingbecausethey'reafraidofwhatyoumightaskforinreturn.
That'snotgoodbecausethatcutsyouoff.Thatcutsyouoffasanoontheirnetworkbecausetheygo,"Crap,I'dlovetohaveJordan'shelpinlaunchingmybook,butIreallydon'twanttohavehimbackontheshowinAprilbecauseit'sjustgoingtobesohectic.Justdon'tevenemailhim."ThenI'moutthatopportunityandyou'reoutthatopportunity,soit'sanetlossforbothofusanditturnsitintothetransactionalthingwhichitbuildsresentment.
Theotherthingthatitdoesiswheneveranybodykeepsscorethere'salwaysanimbalance.Thepersonkeepingscoreneverfeelsliketheygotagooddeal.IfI'mkeepingscoreandyou're,"Hey,canyouhelpmemybooklaunchinApril,"andIgo,"Yeah,sure."IfI'mkeepingscoresecretlyandnotaskingyouforanything,thenwhathappensisIstarttoresentyoubecauseIgo,"FreakingDavealwaysaskstobeonmyshowandI'malwayslaunchinghisbooks.He'sneveraskedmetoflyouttowherehisstuffis.Idon'tevengetfreecoffeeatBulletproofstore."I
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justbuildthisweirdentitledcovertcontractwherewearebothinsomesortofweirdagreement,butyoudon'tknowaboutit.OnlyIknowaboutit.
DaveAsprey: That'scalledbusinessco-dependence.Itdrivesmenuts.
JordanH: Yeah,andit'scalledcovertcontractsaswellinrelationshipswheretheequivalentisoutsideofbusiness,weallhavethisguyfriendincollege.Hedrivesthisgirltotheairport.He'spickingupherbooks.He'sgoinggroceryshopping,he'sdoingallthisstuffforher.She'slikewe'rejustfriends.Meanwhilehe'slikeonedayshe'sgoingtorealizeI'mtheone.Thenhegetsdrunkonedayandhe's,"I'mcallingAngelaandI'mgoingtotellhershe'shorrible.I'mgoingtodoallthisstuffforher,"andyou're,"No."That'sacovertcontractandwedon'twantthatinourbusinesswhereI'msuddenlyresentingeveryonearoundmebecauseIdidthisforthembuttheyneverdidanythingforme.That'swhatkeepingscoreis.Itisfreakingtoxicinyourrelationships.
Getridofkeepingscore,alwaysbegenerous,alwaysbegivingandyoucanscaleit.That'smaybetwothings,butIfeelliketheyfleshoutnicely.
DaveAsprey: Theydoindeed.That'saphenomenalanswer.Allright,Jordan,IknowpeoplecangotoTheArtofCharm.com.TheygotoiTunesandgoTheArtofCharmshow.Isthereanywhereelsethattheyshouldgotolearnmoreaboutthecoolstuffyoudo?
JordanH: Yeah,sinceyou'relisteningtoapodcast,I'dloveitifpeopletunedintoTheArtofCharmpodcastaswell.Yeah,wealsohaveachallengethatwe'redoingspeakingofrelationships,wherewearehelpingpeopletofosternewrelationshipsforbusinessandpersonalreasonsandwe'realsohelpingpeoplegetoutsidetheircomfortzoneiftheyfindthemselvesbeinginaworkaholicmode,headsdownallthetime,ortheydon'tknowhowtostartthenetworkingandrelationshipdevelopmentprocess.That'satTheArtofCharm.com/challenge.OrifpeopleareintheStatestheycantextthewordCharmed,C-H-A-R-M-E-D,to33444.It'sCharmedto33444anditbasicallywillsay,"What'syouremail."Ifyou'redrivingandyou'reataredlight,youdon'thavetotrytonavigateonSafariorwhateveronChrome.Youcanjusttextitanditwillaskforyouremailanditsendsyouthechallenges.It'ssuperfun.Wehave5,000peopledoingitandit'sjustradtoseehowmanyconnectionsarebeingmadeforpersonalandprofessionalreasons.Peoplearegettingpromotionsandstuffsothat'swhatwegotgoingonrightnowanditwillbegoingforthenextfewmonths.
DaveAsprey: Well,thatwas33444textCharmed,Irememberthatright?
JordanH: Yeah,the33444,sothat'sthephonenumber,33444,andyoutextthewordCharmedtoit.It'sweirdbecauseinEuropetheyhavethatjusteverywherebutintheStatesthoseshortcodes,they'rejustnotthatcommon.Ithinkthey'rejuststartingtobeoncommercialsandstuff,ormaybeI'mjustbehind.
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DaveAsprey: They'recool.I'mgoingtostartusingoneaswellforBulletproofRadio.
JordanH: Yeah,doit.
DaveAsprey: Getaheadofthecurve.
JordanH: Leaddigits.
DaveAsprey: Allright,Jordan.ThanksatonforbeingonBulletproofRadio,andyouguysjustheardJordanHarbingerfromTheArtofCharm.Ifyouenjoyedtoday'sshow,Iwouldappreciateitifyou'ddosomething.Jordanhas8,500five-starreviewsforTheArtofCharmbecausehe'ssocharming,andI'mworkingongettingtothatlevelofcharmandthatlevelofreviews.Ifyoulikedthisshow,ifitgaveyousomethingusefullikedon'tsitonyourwallet,headonovertoiTunesandleaveareviewforme.Ireallyappreciatethefeedback.It'shelpfulandithelpsotherpeoplefindtheshow.Haveanawesomeday.Thanks.
