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THE SECRET PLACE

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The

EDMOND SANGANYADO Origen House

SECRET PLACE

49 REASONS KNOWING GOD

TRANSFORMS PRAYER

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The Secret Place: 49 Reasons Knowing God Transforms Prayer

2015 by Edmond Sanganyado Published 2015 by Origen House A division of Chronicles of a kid next door www.gracemusing.com Origen House www.origenhouse.com Printed in United States of America All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in

any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system without permission in writing from the publisher.

Cover image: Fr Sonneveld from unsplash.com Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are from

the Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

The Secret Place / Edmond Sanganyado ISBN 978-1-50897-513-7 Religion / Christian Life / Prayer

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For those struggling with prayer

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ContentsContentsContentsContents

Introduction 1

Teach us to Pray 11

Practices of Righteousness 35

God is Our Father 47

Savoring His Holiness 55

The Glorious Name 67

God is our King 79

Understanding Kingdom of Heaven 89

Reveling in Gods Heart 101

Communing the Living Bread 111

Participating in Christ Divine Nature 119

Forgive Thyself 131

A Heart Captured by Gods Awe 141

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The Day I Prayed Using Curses 153

After Amen 161

7 Resources for Effective Prayer 173

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IntroductionIntroductionIntroductionIntroduction

An infant who does not cry will die in a baby wrap carrier.

k S A LITTLE BOY, I watched my mother cry out to God with a loud voice. Dad was seriously ill. Every day, Mom entered her bedroom,

closed the windows and curtains, and poured her heart before the Creator. Through shrieks and groans, she begged the All-Powerful, Creator of Heaven and Earth to take away the mysterious ailment haunting Dad. After half an hour, she would emerge from the

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bedroom, wipe her tears, fake a smile, and continue with her daily grind.

Every day, I wished God could hear Moms cries. After Dad passed away, mom prayed less

frequently, once or twice a month. Hearing Mom praying meant something was up, either someone was sick or there was no money for the bills or school fees. As her monthly pension dwindled, hit by inflation, her prayers became more frequent. By watching her, I learned to call on Jehovah, when things go awry or when I needed something.

Back then, we did not call to God in the name of Jesus because we did not know Him. Mom cried out to Jehovah since that is what her church taught. Jesus was a great teacher, prophet, and a worker of miracles, she was told.

Seven years after my dad's demise, Mom fell critically ill. People from her church visited and called upon the Creator fervently. Mom's health did not improve but got worse with each passing day. Often, I would sheepishly go to the restroom and cry out to God. If tears could heal, today my mom would be around.

Mom was admitted to the hospital several times in the fateful three months. I do not know why, but she did not want me to visit. It was too painful for her, I

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believe. I once visited her, and left the hospital hopeless. I saw her lie helplessly on the hospital bed, a pale shadow of her bubbly self. She faked a smile, but pain and lethargy failed to cooperate. Mom had little blood in her veins, the physicians said. That is why she was often weak and erratic. The doctors suspected she might be anemic, but at other times they said she had pneumonia. I did not know what to believe. Watching my mom suffer, knowing there was nothing I could do was very painful. But, one of her fellow church members had other thoughts.

"I know we have prayed to God, and that is good. You should consider surrendering your life to Jesus. Jesus is the Savior who came to take up all our sins."

Upon hearing this, I was angry. Leave my mother alone, and go with your Jesus sermons somewhere else, I fumed silently. But, the man was relentless, he wanted Mom to believe in the Jesus stuff. After Mom was discharged, he visited her every other day. He would bring a large over-used Bible, sit uneasily next to Mom who lay on the couch in the living room, listen to her complaints and aspirations, and after a while sing a song and prayed. This went on for maybe a month. Occasionally, he would read a Bible verse and expound on it a little bit. My brothers and I loathed him, instead of praying for her, he was wasting time

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reading the Bible. One day, coming from school, I found him leading Mom in what I later learned was the sinner's prayer.

Honestly, I never understood the Jesus thing. I grew up in a deeply spiritual community. Spirit mediums and African apostolic prophets performed signs and wonders quite often. Therefore, healing the sick or walking on water never convinced me of His deity. Jesus was simply a good teacher who could work miracles, I convinced myself.

Occasionally, pastors visited my high school. You are all sinners, God is angry at you unless you repent you will all perish, they would say. After receiving a note from one of the teachers reminding them their time is up, they would pray. Every time, they ended their prayer with the words, in Jesus' name and I would wonder what is up with this name.

After my mother passed, national examinations for Ordinary Level were coming up. Of course, everyone thought I would pass, but I prayed. Mom had taught me to pray. I prayed for eleven As. I thought if I get that much As then I would get a scholarship for my Advanced Level tuition. I got 9 As and 2 Bs, setting a new record in my town but never received any scholarship; I was not satisfied.

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A few weeks before I received my Ordinary Level results, I received the life of Christ. Prayer became an integral part of my life. I prayed for everything because I had to. When schools opened, I prayed, because I never knew where I would get my tuition. I prayed when I fell ill because we could not afford hospital fees. For the next seven years, prayer was the only option.

My prayer closet was full of accolades, trophies I cherished and polished regularly. I once had tonsillitis; my uncle laid his hands on me and a cream globule dropped from my mouth. I prayed for college enrollment, grades, and tuition, and the Lord heard me. I prayed for everything and the Lord answered.

A few months ago, I was on my bed praying and I realized I did not know anything about prayer. Yes, I had prayed to God for many years and I had several answered prayers to show for it, but I did not know how to pray. Although I had taught several groups about prayer, I did not understand it.

What is prayer anyway? Why and how should we pray? I really do not know the answer. Over the years, I have found one of the main reasons I failed to learn from God was because I answered questions too quickly. I did not hasten to find the answer on my own, but prayed.

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"Dear Father, I realize I do not know how to pray. Many times, I have prayed to you, but I do not know why I even pray. Please, Father, teach me how to pray. In Jesus' name, I pray. Amen."

As time passed, I realized I was not the first person to ask that of Christ. About 2,000 years ago, twelve people went before Christ and asked him to teach them how to pray. The twelve saw Jesus praying, they witnessed how prayer was an integral component of Christ's life. They did not just imitate Christ's prayer habits, but wanted to learn prayer. Not only did they want to know how to pray, they wanted to know why they should pray.

One day, I was lying in bed and I had an interesting thought. What will occur if I say the Lord's Prayer every day in the following seven days? I made a resolution to read the Lord's Prayer daily and meditate on one petition each day, writing down everything I learn. In seven days I will be done, I told myself.

But, I was wrong. What began as a week's endeavor took the whole

month, and probably will take a lifetime. I read Mathew 6 and Luke 11 at home, at school during lunch, on a hospital bed, and on the bus to Northern

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California. Day and night, I meditated on the scriptures on my bed in the comfort of my home, on my bike on the way to school, and even during an MRI in the hospital. Every time, I would write down what I learned.

There was a lot, and still a lot more to learn. As I studied each petition, I wrote down at least six reasons from each request that could transform my prayer. Indeed, the Lord's Prayer can revolutionize the secret closet. Since prayer is a critical practice of righteousness, believers should learn how to pray as taught by Jesus.

PRAYING AMISS

Jesus listed prayer as one of the three practices of righteousness. The core facet of all the practices of righteousness was secrecy. Believers were encouraged to give in secrecy. Pharisees used to stand on high pedestals and shout loudly in the marketplace whenever they gave to the poor. They wanted to be known as givers. The third practice Christ encouraged to be conducted in secrecy was fasting. Fasting is a deep spiritual practice that has been reduced to a sign of spiritual maturity in the past two millennia. Prayer, fasting, and giving are not marks of Christian growth,

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but essential practices of righteousness believers should conduct in their secret closets.

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.

James 5:16

In the above quote, James identified the importance of righteousness in prayer. The Pharisees prayed as a demonstration of righteousness. The practices of righteousness are not a display for people to acknowledge how deeply spiritual we are, rather an honest pursuit of the knowledge of God. Hence, in the Sermon on the Mount, Christ advised believers, Unless your righteousness exceeds that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 5:20).

Christ expects our righteousness to be far and beyond that of the Pharisees. Pharisees only became righteous by keeping the law. They practiced righteousness outwardly, as a show. Christ came and became righteous under the law. Christ imputed righteousness to us when we believed. We received righteousness by faith in Jesus. Through faith, our

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righteousness exceeds the righteousness of the Pharisees.

However, being human, it is quite easy to fall back to the righteousness of the Pharisees. Prayer, fasting, and giving among Pharisees was an outward show, devoid of any spiritual significance or reverence to God. When we pray to be heard, fast to be seen, and give to be recognized, we would have fallen into the righteousness of the Pharisees.

In the Lord's Prayer, Christ teaches us how to pray. Unlike my prayers when I lost my parents, Christ demonstrated there was so much more to prayer than asking for help. The petitions in the Lord's Prayer do not require casual prayer but engaged and attentive seeking.

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Matthew 6:33

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CHAPTER 1

Teach us to PrayTeach us to PrayTeach us to PrayTeach us to Pray

A goat that gives birth in front of people needs help with keeping away flies.

k ARKNESS ENVELOPED THE SERENE neighborhood like Santas Christmas gift-wrap; neatly and tightly. With all the kids

tucked up in bed, no shriek, screech, or cry echoed in the mystifying silence. It had been hours since everyone had retired to bed. I sat alone in the darkness and silence surrounded by ghastly gloom and ghoulish doom.

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I was the only one awake in the neighborhood, or so it seemed. Even witches and robbers were still wrapped in the arms of Morpheus. No cars huffed and puffed along Linden Street since it was winter break, and only graduate students were on campus. No late night music blared across the neighborhood.

No, I did not have insomnia, I just did not want to sleep.

No wailing gales aversely playing in a brusque terrestrial ensemble twirled the trees or roused the twigs, but there was noise. A deafening sound echoed, suffocating the pensive night. I did not hear anyone shouting, but I heard loud voices. A noise. A noise so earsplitting I cowered, fists clenched, eyes squinting, and lips tight. I was afraid. I could not hide or flee. The noise was coming from inside. Not inside the house, but me. How could I flee or hide from myself?

Like resounding African drums at dawns break proclaiming the tragic loss of a venerated king, my heart pounded heavily, shaking my chest. A haunting panorama of days past rolled before my eyes, snatching the tiny mustard seed of hope that I religiously clinched. I remembered the conversations I had some time back. I was doomed, I concluded. Yet, I continued to struggle to put my mind on only one thing. Yet, only one thing was needful. I desperately

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longed for an open-heart surgical conversation with God. Yet, I failed to find the right words. Maybe I was looking for the wrong thing- the right words.

As I realized I was grossly anxious and profusely worried, I asked myself a protruding question. How did I get here? Regrettably, like many important questions I did not have a clue. I did not know how I ended up writhing with anxiety in the middle of the night. One thing I knew, for the better part of the year, I had been worried about many things. I was worried about my family. I had two kids, a preschooler and a toddler. The kids had to go for early child development, but my grad student stipend was only meant for singles. Not just single people, but single people with rich parents. I had a family to take care of from a monthly wage that was not enough for one person. Besides the pathetic finances, my studies were fast becoming a nightmare. A couple of my experiments were botched and my hopes of ever graduating dwindled. I was a mess.

For almost a year, I did a great job concealing my stress from my family. Of course, no matter how much I tried, my wife always noticed when I was down. I know she always prayed for me, but I was too busy being stressed that I never stopped to pray for myself. I thought I concealed my pain from my family, but I

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was hiding it from myself. And I did a great job. As they say in ChiShona, rinamanyanga haraputirwe - you cannot conceal anything that has horns. That fateful night, all the stinky worry, piled high and deep in my heart, overflowed. The stench was so strong it blew away my sleep. Alone in the night, I faced my deepest fears. How I wished I had a sling and only one pebble, maybe I could have defeated the giant that was teasing me.

For several months, I published encouraging and inspiring articles on the web, but neglecting the elephant that was in the room. I reveled watching people across the globe uplifted by the words I crafted, but deep inside I longed to find the same hope from what I wrote. I did not only write, but spoke with other believers. A few months ago, a friend told me about some problems she was facing. After pouring out her heart, I gave her some words of encouragement and prayed with her. A few weeks later she called, all teary, and told me how God had intervened and helped her. I should have been happy, but I was not. Why was God not doing the same in my life? God was giving peace to all the people I give words of encouragement to except me.

This was the voice shouting in my mind. This was where the deafening sound came from.

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My mind. I have been through worse things. Finances,

health, and studies are not a big deal. When I received the life of Christ, I was in a worse position than where I found myself that fateful winter night. Things did not get better by receiving the life of Christ, but I had peace. I was no longer caught up on what to eat or to wear. I did not have anything to wear or to eat most of the times, but God gave me peace. Nothing beats peace. However, there were days when the dark clouds hung around me. I would leave the house and walk for at least ten miles. In Karoi, there were lots of trees, mountains, and animals. Reading the book of Psalms, I would marvel at Gods creation. In the end, the glory of Gods creation assured me that Christ would never forsake me.

When the worry got worse, fasting was always an easy alternative since there was nothing to eat. I would fast and pray. I do not remember praying for food or money, but I wanted to know Gods plan. I wanted to know where Edmond Sanganyado stood in Gods plan. I knew if God had a plan for me, He would never let me perish. Knowing Gods will sustained me in the moments of worry. The longest fast I ever had was nearly three weeks. I was in college then. A friend of

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mine noticed what was happening and he took me to his home where he forced me to eat.

Anyone who has visited Sub-Saharan Africa might have noticed how believers go into the woods and climb mountains for a night or day of prayer. I also did that. Overlooking my family home in Karoi, was a mountain in a nearby farm. Oftentimes, I would quietly climb the mountain and sit under a tree. After singing for a while, I would cry out to God. The mountain gave me privacy. It was my hidden closet with no noise except my voice calling the Father.

Coming to America, I was confronted by external noise. Pardon my generalization, but I found America very noisy. Compounded with jetlag, I could not sleep. A train line was a few feet in front of the room where I stayed. The fire department in the city prided itself for the fastest response time. No wonder every twenty minutes fire engines wailed raucously, drowning my cherished silence. At least the noise was from outside.

As they say in my native language, chisingaperi chinoshura - what does not end is sacrilegious. After a little while like an aptly trained soldier in a raging war, I learned to turn off the disturbing noise and focus on only what mattered. At last, I enjoyed the wit and humor of Maggliozi brothers, Click and Clack on Car Talk, or laugh as I watched my favorite TV show, I

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Love Lucy. I could hear clearly now because the noise was gone.

Silencing the external noise was easy. I only focused on what was important and also got used to the noise. The noise never left, even as I write, ambulances are blaring, but my mind is wrapped up on this book. I want this book to be good. I want people to learn from my experiences and I will be elated if many people would stop to pray as they read. This book is important to me at the moment, I do not care about the noise outside. Unfortunately, the noise from my mind did not permit me to focus on anything important. I could not pray or even read the Bible.

How could I calm the internal storm? Although many believers will not admit it, I am

not the only believer who struggles with anxiety. Instead of giving comfort and hope, they are times Pauls words, Be anxious about nothing, seem to be agents of guilt and shame. I felt ashamed for being anxious and guilty for being hypocritical. When worried, I am ashamed to tell even those close to me fearing they might misconstrue the anxiety with a lack of faith. Through this fear, instead of confronting the elephant in the house, I allowed it to grow and bear kids.

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Another major reason I continued to struggle with anxiety was me. I was not merely part of the problem, I was the major cause of the problem. Let me explain. Life is like a gigantic concert hall. Through ignorance and misplaced faith we wrongly allow the audience to sit on stage and chase away the musicians, relegating them to a sit in the auditorium. Good acoustics and quality instruments will not quell the hullaballoo that ensue. It will be presumptuous and nave to blame the sound engineer for the discord when the audience because of no musical ability succumb to discord. Through my witlessness, I offered a crispy voice to anxiety, and worry spoke. Even in the riot I simply had to pull the plug, but how?

You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock.

Isaiah 26:3-4

When we stay our mind on the Lord, we behold His glory and Christ transforms us into the same image from one degree of glory to another (2 Corinthians 3:18). Jesus Christ is the Prince of Peace, thus by beholding Him we receive His peace. What is it that we

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see in Christ that offers us peace? In the 2 Corinthians 4, Paul shows us what the source of peace is, rather who the source of peace is. When we are afflicted, perplexed, persecuted, or struck down in every way, we do not cringe and sink into despair because Christ planted a treasure in our earthen vessels. Our source of hope is the dying of Christ - Christ lifted up on the cross like the brazen snake lifted by Moses in the desert. The cross ushers a peace that surpasses all understanding because it reminds us the same Spirit that raised Christ from dead is at work in us. Because of the Spirit, death failed to defeat Christ, how could anything defeat me?

Like many who perished in the desert, I chose to look at the snakes that slithered around me - the bills, the health, the botched experiments and the fear. There is a great ChiShona proverb for what occurred that day, ndakarumwa nechekuchera - I was stung by what I was digging. The stress meditated on took a toll on my health, my body suffered because of my negligence. Only one thing was needful, looking at the cross. At the cross, Christ died so that I may live and became a curse so that I may be a blessing. At the cross, my perfect peace stood arms stretched wide open waiting for me

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Because of the sacrifices of Jesus Christ that he made on the cross for us, He has become our Jehovah Shalom, which means Jesus is our peace.

Lionel Petersen, a South African musician

WHEN GOD CALLED ME TO PRAYER

If everything else fails, try prayer, says one of the most popular Christian clichs. I tried prayer. After that painful night, I considered having the regular prayer, but it was just a mere thought, nothing substantial. I did not stop praying but had a strange feeling that my concept of prayer, like my fateful experiments, was botched. A once vibrant prayer life had become lifeless like a mining town after all minerals dry out. Though rich in Chistianese, my prayers were empty and shallow. Honestly, I never expected God to answer any of them. They were an empty ritual I was too conservative to abandon.

In 2002, I ran into Dick Eastmans bestseller The Hour That Changes the World. For a couple of years, before complacency slipped in, this book revolutionized my prayer life. I did not hesitate to incorporate Dick Eastmans 12 practices, such as praise

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and worship, waiting on the Lord, confessing, pray the Word, and thanksgiving in my daily talk with God. There were several nights I sat alone in the dark pouring praises before God, acknowledging His goodness, love majesty, and power. My voice is only meant for shower concerts, so I roped in a radio to assist me in songs of praise and worship. Almost every day, I confessed my sins before God. Sometimes, I would pick up my Bible and pray aloud a chapter or two not forgetting thanking God for His love and kindness. Dick Eastmans book helped me a lot.

Unfortunately, through complacency, arrogance and unanswered prayers, the art of prayer slipped from my hands.

I bowed to the internal pressure as the constant prodding hammered my heart. I am a certified bookworm, on average I read at least two hundred books per year. Usually, I read two books at a time. So, when confronted by my lack of knowledge regarding prayer, I resorted to studying. No, not studying the Bible, but books written by fellow believers. Whenever, I realize I do not know a specific subject area, be it in my studies or spiritual life, books are my first port of call. It is not surprising in the past three years I have acquired books that can turn a community librarian in a city in developing countries green with

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envy. Prayer was now on top of my list of bothersome areas and I had to do everything in my power to master it. That was the problem.

Prayer is not a subject to be mastered or an area demanding expertise, but a practice that one needs to engage. Several times this year, God has reminded me I should not merely study prayer but engage in prayer. I did not want to pray, I wanted to read. To add more horns on my dilemma, all of my favorite authors recently published books on prayer. Max Lucado had Before Amen: The Power of Simple Prayer, DA Carson Praying with Paul: A Call to Spiritual Reformation, and Timothy Keller Prayer: Experiencing Awe and Intimacy with God.

Do not buy the books, pray. As anxiety mounted and crippled me, one

weekend I spent the whole day in bed. I did not want to do anything, even watch a movie. I only wanted to rest. I took my phone and opened my Bible app and played the book of Luke. I kept repeating the book the whole day. Finally, after listening for several hours, I got my answer. Pray. God did not want me to simply learn the whats, whens and hows of prayer, but to simply pray. Prayer was not a course up for credit, but an intimate conversation between a Father and his

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beloved son, a King of kings and his servant and a Groom and his bride.

LEARNING PRAYER THROUGH PARABLES

Now Jesus was praying in a certain place, and when he finished, one of his disciples said to him, "Lord, teach us to pray, as John taught his disciples."

Luke 11:1

Jesus Christs prayer life was vibrant and effective. His disciples noticed it too. They saw Him retiring to the mountain after a day spent preaching, teaching, and healing the sick. When He worked miracles and fed the hungry, they saw Him separating Himself from the crowd into a hidden place to seek the heart of the Father. At the mountain of transfiguration, the disciples saw Christ in prayer being transformed in glory. When a child harassed by demons was brought before them, the disciples saw the power of prayer at work in Christ as He cast out the evil spirits. In Jesus Christ, the disciples saw the power of prayer and how Christs prayer habits built who He was and established His ministry. They too wanted to have that kind of prayer life, who would not?

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Just like most of us 2,000 years later, the disciples were fond of scholarship. They did not mind a postgraduate degree in prayerology or a signed copy of How to Pray Like Jesus. Rather, Jesus opted not to offer a lecture on what is authentic prayer, six steps to effective prayer or why prayer is the only thing necessary for a successful Christian life, but said, When you pray, say: Father, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come. Give us each day our daily bread. Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. And lead us not into temptation. (Luke 11:3-4).

Christs statement was packed with several assumptions that every believer should understand. In His response Jesus assumed they all knew what prayer was if they did not then the words of the prayer offered an operational definition. Thus, if we take the Lords Prayer as the operational definition of prayer then most of the rumblings we offer to God as prayer became obviously complaints and murmurings and not a sacred conversation between a Creator and His revered creation.

Another assumption inherent in the statement is Christ assumed they already knew why they should pray. Over the years, I had a warped view of when to pray. I thought I should pray only when things go the

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wrong way. My prayers were like a fire extinguisher, only good when a fire breaks out. However, if they did not know why they should pray, again the Lords Prayer offered apt advice.

The last assumption packed in the statement is Christ assumed they will pray. The statement was more of an instruction than an invitation to pray. Jesus expected the disciples to pray. On several occasions throughout His ministry, Jesus encouraged the twelve to pray. At one time, Jesus took James, John, and Peter up a mountain and instructed them to watch and pray. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus emphasized the importance of prayer by listing it among the three practices of righteousness. Christ expects us to pray.

Although Christ taught us how to pray and expects us to pray, over the years my prayer fountain dried up. One of the main reasons being my lack of understanding on what prayer is. As I listened to the book of Luke, I realized Jesus told His disciples three parables that can revolutionize prayer. In these parables, Jesus highlighted some of the wrong perceptions people had on prayer. The main error being our view of God. Jesus gave these parables as an illustrative guide to help us know God as the Father and King. Thus, knowing God transforms prayer.

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1. Understand the Goodness of God

Reminiscing on my setbacks in prayer, I discovered the fundamental reason my prayer life waned like a dying candle was my uncertainty with Gods faithfulness. Will God listen to the rumblings of a messed up person like me, I would wonder. God is true and faithful, that is indisputable, but I had my doubts. I knew God was able to answer my prayer through peace that surpasses all understanding, but I doubted if He was willing.

I kept a mental ledger of Gods response to my prayers. The balance seemed to tilt to the negative. Many times I had cried to God and my prayers had gone unanswered. For many years, I was elated at how God always answered my prayers. For the past three years, I have prayed many times for my research work. Besides a journal article I published a year ago, nothing has been improving. I have cried out to God for wisdom and understanding many times, but nothing has changed except my time is running out. So, when I say I know God is able but is He willing, this is a problem I face daily.

As doubt mounted, the parable of the persistent friend came into mind. In the parable, Christ told a story of a man who had visitors at night. In my culture,

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when a person visits you it is customary to give them something to eat, preferably sadza, a thick corn porridge. Offering a guest a meal is symbolic to extending a right hand of fellowship. So, when a friend visits and I have nothing to give them I feel very bad. I believe the man in the parable felt the same. If he failed to give his guest a meal that was equivalent to throwing them into the streets. He had to find some bread quick, even though it was past sleeping hour.

The only person he knew could give them bread was a friend. The man visited his friend and knocked repeatedly. Jesus concluded the only reason he received the bread was his importunity. The friend only responded to persistence and not their friendship. As human beings, we are often self-centered, with our comfort and luxury more important than other peoples needs. The friend considered a peaceful good night sleep to be more precious than giving bread to his friend. What happened to a friend in need is a friend indeed?

Is Christ like the self-centered friend? Does God value His comfort more than my struggles? Would He rather spend the day watching the stars and counting the galaxies than attend to my aid? Jesus compared the self-centered friend and parents. Although evil, all parents are pleased to give good gifts to their children.

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When a kid cries for bread they do not give them rocks, but bread. But God is not self-centered or evil, thus He does not respond to persistence only. God answers our prayers because of His sovereign goodness.

As pressure in my studies mount and my finances continue in their instability, I choose to pray because God is good. God is not limited by my persistence, rather I limit my prayer life through my poor understanding of the goodness of God. For that reason, when we ask He gives us the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of adoption that helps us cry out Abba, Father (Luke 11:13). The same Spirit helps us pray with groanings that cannot be uttered.

2. Have Faith in God

For several years, I cherished the acronym PUSH: Pray Until Something Happens. It was because of this wrong, rather misguided, belief that I spent nearly three weeks praying and fasting. I prayed day and night for my finances and studies, but nothing changed. Through listening to testimonies from other believers who prayed until something happened, I jumped on the bandwagon of ridiculously persistent prayers. There is nothing wrong with being persistent, but at times it exposes how much we doubt the Lord we are calling unto.

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Prayer is not limited to asking God to provide for our needs, but may involve seeking justice for both ourselves and others. In the past few months, there has been a number of national tragedies around the globe. In East Africa, more than 5,000 people died of Ebola and believers prayed for health. As natural disasters, earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes, or flooding claimed lives and left many homeless, believers prayed for provisions. God used many people to ensure many people received good health, food and a place to sleep.

A few weeks ago, four gunmen stormed a university in Kenya and gunned down all the students. About 150 students were killed because of their faith, adding to a trend spearheaded by Islamic extremist groups. In one painful incident, a father heard her daughter being killed over the phone at the university. For almost a week, the death of the Christian students in Kenya was another sad statistic. One morning, I stumbled upon a Facebook page belonging to students at Garissa University. It was not the graphic image of bloody lifeless bodies that horrified me, but the cute smiling images with the caption, does anyone know where So-and-so is? The 150 dead people had names, they had faces and friends that cared about them. Tears welled up my inside as I read the comments pouring in under most of the images.

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I am sorry, So-and-so was among the comrades we lost.

In one post, someone inquired about their friend and were told she was alive. I do not know who that lady is, but reading she that gave me a sigh of relief. In that mourning community, I found something I had not found in church for many years. They were not vengeful or baying for blood. It was common knowledge an Islamic extremist group was responsible for the attack, but none of them raised a fit against Al Shabaab. In every post I read, the students comforted themselves in the Lord and reminded each other of eternity. It seems eternity with Christ was more important than vengeance.

The pain of the people affected by the Garissa massacre is real. Thus, seeking justice is normal.

Jesus taught another parable about a widow who wanted justice with her neighbor from an unjust ruler. The woman wanted something that was contrary to character and behavior of the ruler. For example, when you ask for something from a stingy person you already know your answer. He will not give it to you because they are stingy by nature, a stingy person does not give. The widow had nowhere else to go, the unjust ruler was the only one who could help her, so she kept making her requests known to the ruler.

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The widow was so persistent that it became bothersome and the ruler granted her wish. Although justice was contrary to his nature, the ruler had to be just in order to get rid of the woman. Like the self-centered friend, the ruler valued his peace more than justice or others and only persistence could move him.

Is God an unjust ruler? Will He fail to provide justice for His children? When Hagar was cast away by Sarah, the Lord visited her. Although she was partly to blame for the woes that fell on her, God showed favor to her and took care of both her and Ishmael. God is righteous and just and through His grace, he even extends to those who do not deserve it.

When looking at this parable, believers need to take heed at Christs last words, Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth? (Luke 18:8) Prayer is not about persistence or justice only, but faith. As I scrolled through the posts on the Garissa University Facebook page, I realized most of these students had found what was important in prayer. As they prayed for each other they did not let the honest pursuit of justice distract them from their faith in God. As a loving Father, God is not looking for persistence, but faith because only through faith, we can pray without losing heart (Luke 18:1, 1 Thessalonians 5:17).

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3. Be Humble

At one time, I attended my churchs national youth conference. The conference was conducted in Harare, so together with members of my youth group from Karoi, we traveled to the bright lights of the Sunshine City. Sitting in the bus going to the conference was a miracle. When the conference was announced I prayed to God that I wanted to go to the conference. Here I was sitting in the bus with other young people, God heard me.

Besides meeting new people, I learned a number of things at the conference. One of the most important lessons I learned was, never judge a brother by the color of their suit. One morning as the service started, the person who was leading the worship asked a certain guy wearing a red dinner jacket to lead the prayer. It was disastrous. To save face, the worship leader jumped in and finished the prayer. Not all people wearing super spiritual regalia know how to pray.

Unfortunately, believers are often caught up in the outward show of spirituality and miss out on an authentic relationship with Christ. As a kid, I struggled with pretending everything was fine when I was sick. I could fake being well like a kid faking being sick,

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afraid of a school bully. I mastered the art of faking but never succeeded fooling my mom. She always knew when I was faking. I did not like missing classing, so I would fake being well when I was sick. Mom hated it; it made her look like an uncaring mom. By faking, I was not giving her an opportunity of being a mom to me.

I approached prayer with the same attitude. For many years, I thought a positive attitude and faking was a testament of maturity and faith. Furthermore, I was embroiled in the concept of rewards. I wanted to out-perform God. After hearing a sermon about how Hezekiah prayed to God to heal and add to his years by pointing God to his good works. I wanted to do the same. I wanted to be in a position where I could tell God to look at the good things I did. In the end, I prayed with the wrong attitude and the wrong motive.

In the last parable on prayer, Jesus talked about a Pharisee and a publican. In a merit-based society, spiritual acknowledgment was granted to people who executed righteous deeds. As a result, the Pharisee thought his works could buy off Gods favor. On the other hand, acknowledged his wickedness and realized he was at Gods mercy, there was nothing in him that could provoke Gods favor. The Pharisee looked up at himself, but the publican looked up at

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God. Humility is not looking down at you, but looking up at God. God gives grace to the humble and resists the proud (1 Peter 5:6).

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CHAPTER 2

Practices of Practices of Practices of Practices of RighteousnessRighteousnessRighteousnessRighteousness

A jungle with no smelly-berry fingerleaf is too far for a jackal, no matter how close

it might be.

k DID NOT WANT ANYONE to know what I was doing, especially my mom. Mom wanted me to focus on my studies; I could not afford failing. Literally.

Every term, Mom went through thick and thin to make sure my school fees were fully paid. I would not do anything to disappoint her.

I

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I will never forget the day mom almost cried before me. She thought she had failed as a parent. I was in form one, and the headmaster returned me home because my school fees were not yet paid. Mom tried to talk the headmaster into giving me a grace period, but it all came to naught. It was painful watching her trying to withhold tears.

I loved my mom and I never wanted to disappoint her. Maybe that explains why I still work extra hard, even when it is not necessary. I studied hard, very hard, because I wanted to make her happy. The only moments I remember seeing her excited was when she looked at my school report. I wanted to keep that smile on her face.

Like any other teenager, I had a secret passion - theater. I loved theater. I enjoyed taking up a character from a play and bringing it to life. With all the pain she goes through to pay my school fees, Mom would never approve of acting, I told myself.

In form two, equivalent to ninth grade in the US, I wrote a play. Together with my close friends, Stephen, Godfrey, and Lovemore, we began practicing acting after school. Mom never bothered to ask when I went home late. She assumed I was studying.

A teacher responsible for theater at our school heard about our drama group. A few weeks later, a

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new drama club was formed. My friends and I were the founders. In less than half a year, our group was touring schools in my town. Although, Karoi was a small town and word spread fast, Mom never knew about the tours.

In ChiShona, there is a proverb, rina manyanga hariputirwi - what has horns cannot be hidden by wrapping up. My school entered a regional drama competition and we were the runners up. Unfortunately, the Denzel Washington and Brad Pitt of Zimbabwe, the late Collen "John Banda" Dube and the late Mackay Tickays, voted me the best actor in the competition. I was the talk of the town for a while.

Fortunately, people only remembered my stage name. My secret was safe for a while, until one fateful day. I took my mom for the parent-teacher day. I was afraid one teacher would let out my secret. Everything went well without incident, for a while.

"Do but worry about your son. He is not going to pass, but excel. He studies hard; you already know that. But Edmond is not only good in academics. You probably saw the money he brought home. He was voted by the top actors in Zimbabwe as the best actor at a recent drama competition. "

Yes, Mom saw the $100, but I never told her it was prize money. Mom never said anything. Maybe she

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yearned to see me on stage and I deprived her. Mom is gone now and she never got to see how her son was on stage.

3 SECRETS THAT CAN TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE

We all have secrets, things that we do not want anyone to know. It might be a hidden sin, a prom picture with an awkward hairstyle, or a child out of wedlock. We systematically withhold such information because we are afraid that people will judge us according to the secrets. Our actions permitted these secrets to be a representation of who we are now.

Not all secrets are bad; they are some good secrets. I will never blurt out my bedroom activity with my wife to anyone. It is a secret. The more I keep it that way, the more intimate my relationship with my wife becomes. They are times when secrecy is a mark of knowledge and intimacy.

In the sermon on the mountain, Jesus Christ revealed three secret practices He cherished. Christ called these secrets practices of righteousness. They are not activities one engages in to become righteous, but they do them out of righteousness.

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What are these secret practices? Fasting, praying, and giving. Pharisees fasted, not in secret, but for everyone to see. Pharisees prayed, not in secret, but with a loud voice at the marketplace. Pharisees gave, not in secret, but with a public announcement. Pharisees were better actors than me, Denzel Washington or Collen Dube.

When I went on stage, I brought to life a character. Tinashe was a preteen boy who lived with an abusive step mom and an absent father. I walked like an insecure kid, talked like one, but I was not one. I was putting on a show. Unfortunately, many people are putting on a Christian show.

1. Fasting

It has been long since I last fasted, and I can tell the difference. When the disciples failed to cast evil spirits out of a troubled kid, Jesus advised them, "This kind can come out by nothing but prayer and fasting. (Mark 9:29) At another incident, John's disciples asked why Jesus' disciples were not fasting like them. Christ responded, "Can the friends of the bridegroom mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them? But the days will come when the bridegroom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast."

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The early church fasted regularly. They recognized it was an essential discipline critical for spiritual growth. They did not only fast for things, a nice car, good wife, and a paying job. Rather their fast was to discipline their body, cultivating their desire for God. All they needed was direction, guidance, and power in ministering the gospel.

2. Prayer

If I sat down with my mom and told her how I loved acting, she could have been my number one fan. By hiding from her, I robbed both of us from sharing the gift. My presumptuous concept of parental support based on poorly interpreted experiences robbed us both.

Unfortunately, such naive presumptions are common in our relationship with God. My poor understanding of my mother's love made my relationship with her suffer. So does a poor knowledge of the true nature of God. A gospel-centered prayer brings a heartfelt conversation between the Redeemer and the redeemed. It is an authentic exchange of desires, dreams, and disappointments. Christ wants this for us, hence His timeless advice: "When you pray, say..." (Matthew 6 and Luke 11).

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3. Giving

On stage, I shared my talent with thousands of people, but those I cared about the most were missing. Strangers ululated and whistled, drowning the town hall with applause. I had given my best shot. On stage, I was a brave kid who confronted his dad for sexually abusing his daughter. In reality, I was a scared kid afraid my mom will discover I was into theater.

The early church grew exponentially because people saw how they loved each other. Everyone gave everything they had. They gave remembering the cost of their salvation. Alms were offered to the poor out of love. They could show love through giving because they too had been shown love at the Cross.

THE RIGHTEOUS IN THE SECRET PLACE

Through faith in Christ, we are the righteousness of God. We do not fast, pray, or give to become righteous, but because we are righteous. We fast, pray, and give through faith. Since faith is being fully persuaded that God can do what He promise; fasting, praying, and giving assumes we know God's promise and His true nature.

An effective practice of righteousness has Christ at the center. We fast because the kingdom of God is not

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a matter of eating and drinking, but righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. We pray because the sheep knows the Shepherd's voice. We give because Christ first gave. All this we do in secret, for our Father is with us in the secret place.

The secret place is a rendezvous of intimacy, where the hidden things in our hearts become obvious. In this place, we are not afraid to laugh as if we lost our minds because we will be standing before someone who truly knows us. When Christ is part of the secret, we can cry together. An atmosphere of authentic lamentation and praise fill the secret place. Hannah cried, Jeremiah lamented, and David praised in the secret place.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, "My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust." For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler.

Psalm 91:1-4