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THE SANE GUIDE TO WEIGHT LOSS

75 TIPS TO HELP YOU NEVER DIET AGAIN

Kate Swann & Kristina MamrotLeading Psychologists

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Introduction

ARE YOU A SERIAL DIETER?

Are you good at going on diets, but not good at staying on them? Do you lose weight on a diet, but put it all back on again weeks or months later? Are you tired of the mood of your day being set by the scales? Then read on.

As psychologists specialising in weight loss, we see first-hand every day how painful and demoralising the battle with weight loss can be.

Our clients are ordinary people like you, who’ve come to realize that the struggle with their weight is all about what’s going on in their head.

We conceptualise difficulties with weight as a symptom of a deeper, underlying problem. For most of our clients, overeating is a coping strategy. So we explore why they struggle to cope, and look at alternative, more functional ways of coping.

This book is all about getting sharing some of our strategies and tips. It’s about getting your head in the right place to lose weight AND keep it off. It’s about understanding WHY you struggle with your weight so you can see HOW you can make changes.

After all, if you don’t change what you’re doing, nothing will change. You’ll just repeat the same old cycle over and over again.

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Overeating is a coping strategy. Work out other ways to cope when the going gets tough.That’s right. Many people use food and overeating in order to cope with something that’s not right in their life.

For example, when the going gets tough, an alcoholic turns to the bottle. In much the same way, an overweight person will turn to food.

Overeating is a coping strategy. But it’s not a very functional one. Because overeating leads to piling on the weight, stressing out about it, and not coping with being overweight. And not coping leads to overeating.

What a vicious cycle.

Acknowledge to yourself that you’re caught in this cycle, and work out other ways to help yourself when you’re struggling to cope.

Arm yourself with the right tools to lose weight. If you’re not organised, you’re likely to give up.Would you go camping without a tent, or without the necessary equipment to prepare meals? Would you consider writing a note to a loved one without access to email or a pen and paper?

Of course not. You’d make sure you have the tools you need to get the job done. And because you’ve probably been camping and written a note before, you’d have already worked out which tools lead to the best chances of success.

Why is going on a weight loss regime any different?

So you’ve been on a diet before (haven’t we all). That means you know which diet works for you, and what supports you’re likely to need.

Don’t let yourself be caught up in the fantasy of the latest diet fad where the weight will magically melt off your body and you’ll be transformed in a matter of days.

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Acknowledge to yourself that you’re caught in this cycle, and work out other ways to help yourself when you’re struggling to cope.

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Successful diets just don’t work like that. They’re sheer hard work, and they demand preparation organisation, and the right tools to get the job done. So sit down, work out what YOU need to be successful and get organised.

Time to take responsibility for your weight loss.This is a very important point for people who are battling with their weight.

Overweight people so often feel helpless to do anything about losing weight. It’s as if they’re adrift, floating with the tide, with no ability to change this part of their life they don’t like.

Whatever the reasons are for your weight gain and on-going struggles with yo-yo dieting, the buck stops with you, and no one else.

No amount of fad dieting, exercise plans, or visits to the shrink will make one iota of difference to the scales if you don’t take responsibility for making changes in your life.

Take your life in your own hands and make the decision here and now to make the changes you need to make to lose weight AND KEEP IT OFF.

And yes, that means you can’t eat everything you want to eat.

And yes, it also means you’ll have to get off your butt and get moving.

Your weight is your responsibility, so do something about it now!

Write down why losing weight is important to you and commit to read your list before every single meal or snack.Okay, we know it sounds like a chore. BUT IT WORKS!

First, you write down your list of five or ten reasons why you want to lose weight. Enter it into your phone, laminate the list and keep it with you in your wallet, or paste it on your fridge or inside the pantry door.

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Take your life in your own hands and make the decision here and now to make the changes you need to lose weight and KEEP IT OFF

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The important thing is to read it, read it, read it

Before every meal or snack. The idea is, that this list reconnects you to why staying on your healthy eating plan is important to you. Especially when you’re likely to stray. Like at night, or when you’re feeling low or tired.

Reading your list will remind you why you value your commitment to losing weight.

And will help keep you on track.

If it’s not on your eating plan, it shouldn’t be in your pantry or your fridge.That’s right – clean out that cupboard right now, and take ‘junk food’ off the shopping list.

Make a commitment to yourself right now (yes, that’s right this very minute) to not let junk food over your threshold, except in limited quantities for planned treats.

Oh, and by the way, it’s not okay for other members of the household to buy and eat junk food when you’re focussing on your healthy eating plan.

Sit down to eat - it will slow you down and bring your eating into your awareness.We talk about this tip until we’re blue in the face. Not because we like nagging, but because . . .

IT WORKS!

If you sit down EVERY time you eat AND without distractions, you’re forcing yourself to make eating an event instead of a pastime or afterthought.

Bringing what you’re eating into your awareness puts a stop to any ‘automatic’ eating. When it’s just you, the food and the chair, it’s pretty darned hard to pretend that your jaws aren’t in motion and that you’re engaging in yet another session of non-hungry eating.

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Bringing what you’re eating into your awareness puts a stop to any ‘automatic’ eating.

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Denying yourself the pleasure of regular treats creates feelings of resentment and it’s a short step from resentment to the next binge-eating episode.So stop depriving yourself of food you enjoy, and work out how you can have it in moderate doses.

That’s right – allow yourself to have one of something you really enjoy.

Just one. Not the entire pack.

This is an essential life skill, and it’s vital to develop it if you’re going to maintain your desired weight for the rest of your life.

Don’t wait till you lose weight - accept yourself now and live your life to the full.Because life isn’t a rehearsal where you get to perfect it before you give the performance.

This is your life. Right now. Just the way you are, like it or not.

Do not let the eternal quest for weight loss stop you living your life.

Accepting your weight doesn’t mean you have to like it. You simply accept it. You can still hate it if you like, but you give up the fight. True acceptance is freeing and empowering.

And while you’re living your life, you can focus on being as healthy as you can.

There are hundreds of calories between full and stuffed. The key is to catch yourself when you’re full, before you push the limits.This might sound like an understatement, because it’s hard, isn’t it?

It’s really hard to stop eating when you feel full or near fullness, before you reach that point when you’re over-full. Or stuffed to the brim.

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In fact, because it takes time for your stomach and your brain to catch up, we really need to stop eating BEFORE we feel full.

For some people, that sounds as impossible as thinking about walking on the moon.

It all comes down to being in tune and aware of your body and its signals.

It’s about making conscious choices. Sure, you can choose to acknowledge that you’re full and then choose to eat past the point of fullness. But it may help to stop to consider the number of calories between full and stuffed.

Learn to slow down and catch yourself before you push the limits.

Work consistently at getting your head in the right place to say no around food.Now learning how to say no is a life skill. It’s essential to be able to say no to food you don’t want, or food that isn’t on your eating plan so the diet saboteurs don’t ruin all your best laid plans.

So many of our clients complain to us that saying no feels rude and selfish.

Why?

Aren’t you entitled to your opinion like everyone else? Why do you have to do something you don’t want to do?

Saying no isn’t rude, it’s assertive. And there’s plenty of polite ways to refuse food you don’t want.

Practice a couple of no phrases so they’re ready when you need them.

Identify the emotions that trigger your non-hungry eating.For example are you angry, sad, lonely, or scared? Then make a list of alternative things to do when the nonhungry eating emotion is triggered.

We’re firm believers (and we’ve seen it in action too many times to be doubters) that the primary reason why people overeat is to soothe their overwhelming emotions.

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Saying no to food that you don’t want or isn’t on you eating plan isn’t rude, it’s assertive.

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Let us explain:

When emotions become overwhelming, it can feel unbearable. You feel alone, misunderstood, and isolated. That’s when you turn to food – to comfort, remind you that you have a friend who understands (the chocolate bar), and to make you feel better.

Newsflash – this is an illusion.

A chocolate bar is not your friend. Sure your overwhelming emotions might be pushed aside for a while, but they’ll return – nothing surer.

So work out other ways of feeling better. Write them down, and work your way through them instead of the pantry when you’re feeling down.

Instead of telling yourself how fat and ugly you are when you look in the mirror, find something complimentary and say that instead.Okay, confession time. Are you one of those people who catches sight of themselves in the mirror and starts hurling insults about how fat, ugly and stupid you are?

(How can you tell someone is stupid by looking in a mirror? Good question, you can’t.)

Well, it’s time to start being nice to yourself.

Contrary to popular belief, flinging insults at yourself doesn’t encourage weight loss. In fact, it makes you feel so rotten about yourself that you’re likely to give up and console yourself with . . . yes, you guessed it . . .food.

Now we’re always being asked by our clients, “But how do I think of something nice to say to myself when I loathe the way I look?”

If you haven’t got anything nice to say to yourself, think about what your best friend would say, and make that your new morning mantra.

Just because you’re overweight, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve kindness. So get to it and get kind!

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Flinging insults at yourself doesn’t encourage weight loss. In fact, it makes you feel so rotten about yourself that you’re likely to give up and console yourself with food.

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Eating breakfast EVERY DAY is a nobrainer.So stop being too busy or stop punishing yourself, and do it.We all know that eating breakfast every day is considered essential for your health and well-being.

Scientific research tells us we all perform better in tasks when we’ve eaten breakfast, have more energy, greater brain capacity, and are more likely to succeed when it comes to dieting and maintaining a healthy weight.

So why do so many people skip the most important meal of the day?

In our experience, it’s a misguided attempt to start the day on a starvation diet, or an attempt to punish yourself for overeating the day before.

Enough already!

The research is indisputable. Eating breakfast is a deal-breaker. Just eat it, or give up on your dreams of a smaller waistline.

(Okay, we know we’re being bossy, but it’s really, really important to eat breakfast!)

One of our favourite weight management sayings is (drum roll please) – a binge does not a diet wreck.Why? What? Isn’t a binge a disaster of epic proportions that then signifies you may as well give up and eat everything that’s not nailed down?

Of course not!

The one-off binge episode isn’t a disaster…it’s hardly even a hiccup. The disaster is when you continue to eat everything in sight once you’ve had a binge.

The key to surviving a binge and turning it from a disaster to a hiccup, is forgiving yourself for slipping off the diet bandwagon, and getting straight back on.

That’s right. And if you don’t believe us, try it next time you have a binge.

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The key to surviving a binge and turning it from a disaster to a hiccup, is forgiving yourself for slipping off the diet bandwagon, and getting straight back on.

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The first thing you lose on your diet is your sense of humour.Don’t let that happen to you. Life should be fun. Sure, there are ups and downs, but laughter lightens the load and keeps you young.

So make it a rule to laugh every day of your life. And we don’t just mean a gurumph, or a chortle. We mean a full-on belly laugh.

Let your hair down and have fun.

So you’re dieting – so what? No need to be a worry wart, or party pooper.

Relax, chillax and connect with that part of you that loves a good, old fashioned laugh.

Make sure you’re prepared mentally for fighting the flab. Address emotional issues before you diet.Time after time we meet new clients who are desperate to lose weight, but are also labouring under an enormous amount of pressure.

Changing your eating habits and diet takes time, commitment and energy.

How can you devote the time needed if you’re struggling with a lowered mood (or are even a bit depressed), anxiety, or have work or relationship problems?

You need to make some space for yourself so you can focus on your weight and your health. You can do this by sorting out the non-weight related problems before you launch into your new eating and exercising plan.

Otherwise, chances are you’ll become overwhelmed and it’s a short path from there to breaking that diet and giving up (again).

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Psychological hunger is when we feel empty even though we ate only a little while ago.We’re talking about a psychological emptiness. Not a real empty tummy which is badgering you for food.

When you feel psychologically empty, you feel hollow inside. And no amount of food will fill you up.

Many of our clients describe this phenomenon. And it’s not until they work out WHY they feel so psychologically empty, that they’re able to start working on filling up.

And we’re talking psychologically full, not filling up with food.

For some people it’s about not feeling connected to others in a meaningful way. And for others it’s about not really knowing who they are.

If you suspect your hunger is psychological, it’s time to work out what’s really going on.

Holding yourself in rigid control when you’re dieting inevitably leads to those out-of-control moments you dread.That’s because, when you deny yourself treats and foods you enjoy, you’re setting yourself up for a vicious cycle –

Restriction deprivation resentment binge.Restriction deprivation resentment binge.

And THAT’S why you yo-yo diet (lose weight, put it back on again).

The key is – you need to break this cycle.

Remember, if you don’t do anything different, nothing will change.

So rather than denying yourself treats and foods you enjoy, plan to eat them! Give yourself permission to eat them in moderate amounts and break that vicious cycle.

Break that rigid hold control has over everything you eat, and discover flexibility.

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The key to surviving a binge and turning it from a disaster to a hiccup, is forgiving yourself for slipping off the diet bandwagon, and getting straight back on.

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Examine your life in context - there’s more to you than your battle with weight.All right, we know that your weight feels like a mighty load and the biggest thing in your life right now (pardon the puns, but they’re occupational hazards). But believe us when we say that there’s more to you than your battle with weight.

That’s right.

First and foremost, you’re a person. You have things that you do, people who are important to you, and aspects of your life that you’re passionate about.

Oh, and we almost forgot, you’ve got a problem or two. One of which is you want to lose some weight. But you need to get it in perspective. Your weight doesn’t define who you are as a person – you do that.

Focus on you, shrink your weight problem to the size it deserves, and get on with your life.

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Identify if you’ve inherited using food to comfort yourself. Who else in your family does this?You know how you can inherit things from your family like blue eyes, or a love of classical music? Well you can also inherit dysfunctional eating habits from your family.

Let us explain. Say, for example, a parent turned to cake and a cup of tea each time there was something to worry about in the family. Chances are, you’d inherit this habit as a way of coping when things don’t go well.

And here’s another one that might ring a bell:

If every time a box of chocolates or a pack of biscuits was handed around you heard your Mum or big sister say, “I better not have one – once I start I can’t stop”, you might inherit this way of approaching treats. The all-or-nothing approach.

Take a look at some of your eating habits to see if you’ve inherited them from your family. Realising this gives you the power to change it.

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Your weight doesn’t define who you are as a person – you do that.

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Learn to say no to food-pushers, despite how upset they get. And fear not – saying no isn’t rude, it’s assertive.When people insist that you pile your plate with unwanted food, take an extra helping of that cake they spent hours slaving over just for you, or look devastated when you refuse the nut bowl, they’re thinking of themselves, not you.

That’s right.

They’re being selfish.

For some reason which you probably don’t understand, feeding you is important to them. It makes THEM feel better.

And that’s their stuff – they have to deal with it, not you.

So stay true to yourself and say no with confidence.

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Slow down when you’re making food choices to create some space where choosing differently is an option.So often it feels like reaching for something naughty instead of something healthy is automatic. Your hand hovers between the yoghurt and the biscuit tin, and before you know it, you’ve grabbed a handful of biscuits and you’re secretly enjoying them.

It may feel like this is automatic behaviour, but we’re here to tell you that there’s no such thing.

That’s right. Eating isn’t automatic.

Breathing is automatic. Your heart beating is automatic.

When it comes to eating, there’s a choice – a decision that has to be made. We want you to recognise this, and slow down to create the space in your life to see that it’s a choice, not automatic behaviour.

Slowing down makes all the difference.

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When it comes to eating, there’s a choice – a decision that has to be made. Slow down to create the space in your life to see that it’s a choice, not automatic behaviour.

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When you’re sleep-deprived, losing weight is that much harder.So prioritise yourself and your sleep.

We all recognise how important sleep is, but many of us deprive ourselves, in an attempt to be more productive. This is false economy.

Research tells us that people who are more tired are also more likely to struggle with their weight. If you’re tired, you’ve got less energy to devote to exercise and preparing healthy meals. And you’ve got less willpower when it comes to just having a moderate serve of a treat instead of eating two (or three) helpings.

A lack of adequate sleep is also associated with lowered mood and depression. And when you’re feeling down, where do you go for a quick pick-me-up? The pantry or biscuit tin.

So take a good look at your sleeping habits and make sure you’re prioritising your horizontal hours.

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If you use ‘lack of time’ as a reason for not exercising it’s time to re-organise your priorities.Yes, we know, you’re time-poor.

In fact, we’re all time poor.

The secret to exercising regularly, despite the fact that you simply don’t have time, is to prioritise it.

If exercise is at the bottom of your list, while work, family commitments, housework, and socialising are at the top, you’re never going to have time for it. Take a good look at your commitments and start working out how you can re-prioritise.

First and foremost – your health and well-being needs to be at the top of the list, not languishing somewhere near the bottom.

Because without feeling healthy and caring for yourself, you’re not going to have the energy to get through everything that’s on your plate.

So re-organise your priorities, and make looking after yourself and exercise, number one.

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Soften the edges of perfectionism, lower the bar, and be kind to yourself.Attention perfectionists! Time to explore why that bar needs to be so high. (And you can wipe that smug I’m a perfectionist and I know it look off your face – we’re not impressed).

If you’re driven by perfection, of COURSE you’re going to see all the faults and defects in your body (and your life).

But – news flash – you’re human. And as a human, you’re never going to be perfect. That’s right. Something has to give. And if you’re reading this book, it’s likely to be your weight.

So say sayonara to perfectionism, and embrace yourself, warts and all.

Oh, and by the by, if you can do this, losing weight won’t feel nearly so impossible.

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If you eat the scraps and leftovers, you’re treating yourself like a rubbish bin. If it’s rubbish, throw it in the bin, not into your body.So many of our clients confess they eat unwanted food rather than throw it out. It’s one of those guilty little secrets. Crusts off toast and sandwiches, uneaten food from the kid’s plates, left over casserole, biscuits . . . you name it, they polish it off.

And they’re fully aware that they don’t need it. Most of the time they’re not even hungry. But they are aware that to throw food out is to waste it.

However – isn’t unwanted food which is eaten when you’re not hungry, still being wasted? Isn’t it just as wasted going in your body as it is if it’s thrown in the rubbish?

After all, if your body doesn’t need it, the unwanted food will be stored as fat.

Uneaten food may be wasted if it’s thrown out, but it’s wasted again if you throw it down your throat.

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As a human, you’re never going to be perfect. So say sayonara to perfectionism, and embrace yourself. If you can do this, losing weight won’t feel nearly so impossible.

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Be selfish when it comes to your diet and exercise plan.Self-care is the new black.

Clear the space in your life that you need to focus on yourself and your weight management plan. Contrary to popular belief - putting your needs first will make everyone around you happy.

Including you, once you’ve got over the shock.

If you’re not going to prioritise your needs, you’re not going to stick with your eating plan.

End of story.

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Get over the fact that diarising everything you eat and how much you exercise is boring, and start writing.Keeping a food and exercise journal is a simple yet very effective way of helping you stay true to your eating plan.

Yes, we know it’s boring. And time consuming. (But not as time consuming as fixing those yummy treats that pile on the weight).

You can keep your input and output in a simple notebook, or download one of those terrific little apps which add up all the calories for you.

Keeping a food and exercise journal works because it keeps you connected to how much you’re eating. Fill it out just before or just after every single meal, and you’re constantly reminded how important losing weight and looking after your health is to you.

And if you do break your diet to enjoy something that wasn’t planned, you can see immediately how much you need to cut back by for the next few days.

Yes, we know you’ll get sick of it. But if you fill out your journal and stick to your calorie count and exercise plan, you’ll see results.

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If you’re not going to prioritise your needs, you’re not going to stick with your eating plan.

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When you’re dieting, step away from temptation. Have a stern word-to-self and back off.That’s right. It’s called self-preservation.

Turn your back in that desert tray, keep your eyes averted from all the yummy salty highly fried snacks, and step away from the pantry.

Temptation is always going to be around every corner for people working on losing weight. No matter where you turn, something delicious or delectable will be lurking, just waiting to trip you up and start an all-outbinge.

So have a stern word with yourself, and step away from temptation. If you don’t want it, don’t look at it.

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There’s no point trying to lose weight if you’re over-stressed.You’ve already got too much on your plate. Get on top of stress first.

Now let’s be realistic. How are you going to find time to focus on your new weight loss plan if you’re stressed to the max with the myriad of things you’ve got going on in your life?

If you’re already time-poor and struggling to squeeze an extra five minutes out of every hour, you’re not going to have the time (or the energy) to focus on yourself.

And don’t you dare start thinking about cutting back on sleep (yes, we can mind read, you know). That’s a slippery slope to feeling even worse and mindlessly reaching for snacks for energy.

To get on top of your weight, you need to be on top of your game.

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Temptation is always going to be around every corner for people working on losing weight. So have a stern word with yourself, and step away from temptation. If you don’t want it, don’t look at it.

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Stop beating yourself up over your previous attempts to lose weight.No more – “I’m such a failure”. You’re trying and you’re persistent.

We hear over and over again how overweight people feel like failures because they struggle to lose weight.

Criticising and berating yourself for sliding off the diet bandwagon doesn’t lead to weight loss success. It leads to a low self-image, and a sense of hopelessness about your ability to lose weight. And ultimately, it will almost certainly be the cause of a negative self-image and seeing yourself as a failure.

But you haven’t failed. Sure, you haven’t kept that lost weight off, but you HAVE proven to yourself that you can diet, and diet pretty successfully.

Even losing one or two kilos tells you that you’ve got some of the tools you need for weight loss success.

Now it’s time to work out what else you need so you can keep yourself on track.

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When you’re dieting, stop hanging out at meal times with your junk food eating friends.Explain to us again why you have to go to the pub for fish and chips and half-a-dozen beers?

You see, we’re a bit confused. You told us that losing weight was really, really important to you. You wanted to change your lifestyle and get healthy. Didn’t you?

So how does fish and chips night at the pub fit into that plan? Oh, right, it’s social. And we all know how important social is. So can you order a steak and salad instead, and stop at two beers?

No? Why not? It’s a bit of a conflict, isn’t it? On the one hand you want to lose weight, but on the other hand you’re setting yourself up for weight gain.

Try looking at it like this: if you don’t make any changes in your life, nothing is going to change.

Here endeth the lesson.

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Stop squeezing yourself into clothes that don’t fit.This tip is not only about being kind to yourself but also about being practical.

If you’re wearing clothes that are too tight and uncomfortable, you’re likely to be feeling fat and miserable. It’s a regular reminder that you haven’t lost weight.

And it can feel like a punishment. So your clothes don’t fit. So you’re a work in progress. You’re trying hard, but weight loss takes time and energy, and a lot of know-how.

Did we say it also takes time? So cut yourself a break and buy an item or two (or three or four) that feel comfy and make you feel fashionable instead of frumpy.

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Work out what supports you’ll need to succeed - a diet buddy, gym membership, or weight loss program?Now, no one ever said you had to walk this long, arduous road alone. As humans, we’re pack animals, and we like doing things with another person or in a group. In fact, we thrive on it.

So work out what you’re going to need to succeed on your weight loss plan, and give yourself permission to get help. The support will feel great, and we’re hoping there’ll be plenty of laughs along the way!

Quit bullying yourself to achieve results. Try a little kindness instead.If you’re caught in a cycle of flogging yourself to achieve weight loss results, you’re probably doing more harm than good.

We’re continually shocked when we hear how tough and unrelenting our clients are on themselves as they try and bully themselves into losing weight.

Our clients tell us how they starve themselves, punish themselves with crippling exercise routines, and tell themselves how hopeless, fat and ugly they are. And all in an attempt to force themselves to lose weight.

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Go easy on yourself. Nurture yourself and stop trying to flog yourself into weight loss submission. You’ll be amazed what a little kindness can achieve.

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And how’s that going for you, we ask them. Working is it?

Okay, we admit, we’re being a bit smug here, because clearly it’s not working, or they wouldn’t be coming to us for treatment.

So here’s the take home message, folks: Go easy on yourself. Nurture yourself and stop trying to flog yourself into weight loss submission. You’ll be amazed what a little kindness can achieve.

Relinquishing control over your eating won’t result in chaos and massive weight gain if you create the space to focus on yourself.Our clients pretty much fear this the most when it comes to their weight management. Softening their grip on controlling every morsel that passes their lips can feel like they’ll somehow go mad, eat everything in sight, and swell to the size of a blimp.

Not so. Acclimatise yourself gradually to softening the control.

For example, allow yourself to have two squares of chocolate, knowing that you don’t need to gobble the whole block because you can have more tomorrow.

Eat those squares slowly and mindfully and give yourself permission to enjoy them without wallowing in guilt afterwards.

Adjust your eating plan accordingly so chocolate is just part of your diet.

And relax – nothing disastrous is going to happen. Because it’s moderate and planned and flexible.

Ensure your diet and exercise plan is flexible. Rigid control does not equal success.All right all you control freaks and black-and-white thinkers out there! Yes, we’re talking to you!

We know that you’re convinced that being more in control of your life and what you eat is the way to thin-Nirvana. But you couldn’t be more wrong. When you focus on control, you don’t allow for flexibility. You don’t seek out the shades of grey in your life.

And in our opinion and experience – control is the problem, not the solution.

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And in our opinion and experience, control is the problem, not the solution.

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Some people dread weekends or meals out because they’re likely to overeat, ruin their diet and struggle to get back to healthy eating.But that doesn’t mean you need to stop going out and enjoying yourself. The missing ingredient in this recurring story is planning ahead. When you plan ahead you stop pretending that you’re not going to overeat when you’re out or over the weekend. Instead, you accept that this is your reality, and you plan for it.

And we’re NOT talking planning for a free-for-all each weekend where you fall face first into a chocolate cake and don’t come up for air until Monday morning. We’re talking about being realistic and moderate.

You know you’re going to overeat, so give yourself permission to do so, but in moderation. Approach your eating consciously, and mindfully. And work out in advance how much you’re going to eat.

Give yourself permission to enjoy it without the guilt. And importantly, get back onto your eating plan immediately afterwards.

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Emotional triggers to eating can be overwhelming - they can override feelings of fullness (and common sense).Get back to yourself and what’s important to you by putting your hands on your tummy and asking yourself, “do I really want to eat that?”

All right, we know this sounds (and looks) a bit weird. But trust us, it works. When you put your hands on your tummy, you’re connecting with your hunger (or lack thereof). Our clients who try this are often surprised to find that they want something completely different from what they thought they needed.

One client swore black and blue he needed (note, needed not wanted) two chocolate éclairs. With his hands on his tummy and his eyes closed in session he was amazed that what he actually wanted (note, wanted, not needed) was a bowl of strawberries with a dollop of cream, not the cakes.

Just a dollop of cream because too much cream made him feel nauseous. And the two éclairs? No longer necessary. Eh? This client has now traded the cream on his strawberries for yogurt. And hasn’t felt nauseous for months.

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Approach your eating consciously and mindfully. And work out in advance how much you’re going to eat. Give yourself permission to enjoy it without the guilt.

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Don’t despair if you break your diet - forgive yourself for being human and restart the next day.This is probably one of the most important tools we give our weight loss clients in our psychology practice. A binge, or breaking your diet isn’t really a big problem.

No, wait, we’re serious. It’s not. It’s what happens after you’ve eaten an entire family pack of salt and vinegar chips and washed them down with six beers, that matters.

Okay, so you can use this binge as an excuse to eat everything sight for the next eight weeks. Or . . .

You can forgive yourself for being human, and get straight back on your healthy eating plan the next day.

Sure, there’ll be a molehill in your weight loss chart for that day. But it won’t turn into a mountain.

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When it comes to losing weight, there’s no such thing as a quick fix. Think tortoise, not hare.We’re bombarded every day with endless lose 10 kilos in 10 minutes diets. And then there’s the let’s cut out an entire food group diet.

Of course, the thought that you can lose an enormous amount of weight in a very small period of time is seductive. After all – who wouldn’t want to dump a couple of dress sizes in no time flat?

But, let’s face it. Do they work? I mean, really work, long term? Are these diet fads sustainable? Are they even healthy?

The scientific literature is bulging with evidence that diets actually ultimately increase weight. The lost weight is regained PLUS AN EXTRA 10 PERCENT.

Argh!

There’s only one way to lose weight effectively. And that’s slow and steady wins the day. Think of weight management as a marathon rather than a sprint.

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Connect to your values to help you commit.Now have a really good think about this before you answer this question. What’s really important to you? What do you really value?

We’ll bet the answer is something like happiness, family, and health. Not fish and chips, cream buns, and chocolate.

Yes, chips and chocolate may be important to you, but do you value them above your health? (We hope not. If you do, you’d better drop us a line straight away – we’ve got some serious sorting out to do.)

So next time you’re tempted by chips or chocolate (or that cold beer, that pizza, or that enormous take out meal), we want you to connect to what’s really important in your life.

Hint: That would be your health.

Without your health it’s hard to be happy or spend quality time with the people you care about.

Connecting to your health will help you commit to your eating plan and prevent you from being tempted by the junk food you’ve been daydreaming about.

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Learn to forgive yourself for being human.We all stuff up, we all overeat, we all sleep in and miss our workout. It’s all part of the human condition.

Why do we feel like we have to do everything perfectly, never making a mistake, never putting a foot wrong? What ever happened to learning from your mistakes?

Think about little kids in a classroom – don’t they all learn because they’re making mistakes? Isn’t that part of the learning process? So why is it different just because you’re an adult? Where is it written that you’re meant to get it right every single time?

Making mistakes is part of being human. So if you sleep in and miss your workout, slip up and enjoy a dinner out with friends, or God forbid take a piece of cake at the morning tea, all that means is that you’re human.

Sure those extra calories might not be on your diet plan, but you can shave it from somewhere else, or just let it go. Life is for living, not beating yourself up because you make (human) mistakes. Let yourself off the hook and enjoy your life.

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Connecting to your health will help you commit to your eating plan and prevent you from being tempted by the junk food you’ve been daydreaming about.

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Compensating allows you to overeat occasionally, knowing you’ll cut back your portion sizes the next day, and step up your exercise.Now before we start discussing compensating, let’s get one thing straight. Compensating ISN’T the same as starving.

So how does it work?

It’s all about planning. And it’s really simple.

If you overeat one day, compensate by eating less the next day.

For example, if you know you’re going out for a big night, plan to eat less the day before and the day after, and to exercise for the next couple of days. This strategy allows you to give yourself permission to go out and enjoy yourself without the guilt, knowing you’ll be straight back on track the next day.

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Recognise when someone else does the sabotaging, and stand up for yourself.Have you got people in your life who are endlessly supportive of your diet, but eat junk food in front of you? Or maybe they buy you a chocolate bar as a present. Or get upset when you refuse the treats they’ve made or bought for you, so you end up eating food you don’t want so you don’t hurt their feelings.

This is sabotage folks, in all its underhanded glory.

And you can choose to give in to it, or recognise it for what it is and stand firm.

Of course, it isn’t easy – standing up to other people who coat their sabotaging techniques in a layer of love, is tough. But remember, they’re feeding you to make themselves feel better, they’re not thinking of you.

The only person who’s going to look after you in all this is you. So stand firm, and politely but assertively refuse.

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The only person who’s going to look after you in all this is you. So stand firm, and politely but assertively refuse.

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Lack of energy or motivation is a common reason for not exercising.Time to get real - exercise actually creates energy AND motivation!

Now when it comes to reasons and excuses why it’s just too hard to exercise, we’ve pretty much heard them all. And let us tell you – not feeling motivated enough to pound the pavement or hit the gym is right up there with feeling too tired.

Newsflash people – exercise has actually been proven to GIVE you energy. It also motivates, lifts your mood, and helps when the blahs surface.

Oh, and there’s this urban myth that it helps with burning calories and improving your health too.

Exercise is kind of a one-stop shop for health and well-being.

So if you’re a procrastinator who’s waiting for motivation to descend from the heavens, give up and just get out there.

Time to get moving, people!

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Eating mindfully means you stop when you’ve had enough because you are aware of your body, and your sense of fullness.Imagine if you ate only until the point of fullness, and then stopped, feeling satisfied.

What would your life be like?

No more cravings, no more mindless filling up on junk food, no more guilt because you’ve overeaten.

Practicing mindfulness allows you to tune in to the here and now. It allows you to be fully aware of your body and your needs, and to catch yourself when you’ve had enough.

Mindfulness also helps prevent you from overeating because you might be hungry later.

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Exercise has actually been proven to GIVE you energy. It also motivates, lifts your mood, and helps when the blahs surface.

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So many people use their diet as a form of self-punishment - the diet is a public statement of how ashamed they feel about their weight.Slide shame and guilt to one side and practice being kind to yourself instead.

When you’re punishing yourself for being overweight by putting yourself on a strict diet, you’re likely to be acting out of shame and guilt.

And when we talk shame and guilt, we’re talking about those really prickly, unpleasant emotions. You know, they’re the emotions you want to avoid at all costs.

And what ends up happening?

A self-perpetuating cycle - you feel ashamed because you’re overweight, you turn to food for comfort, you feel ashamed because you’ve blown your diet.

Learn to slide shame and guilt to one side so they don’t burden you and cause a binge.

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Slowing down your life creates the space you need to reconnect with what’s really important.When everything is go-go-go, it’s nigh on impossible to remember to slow down long enough to examine your choices and make different decisions.

But if you’re whizzing through your life at a hundred miles an hour, you’re not going to savour the sweet flavours, appreciate the small things, or stop long enough to smell the roses.

When was the last time you slowed down, or as we like to put it - discovered your inner slob? Slowing down is an important life skill.

Slowing down gives you space in which you can see alternatives. Sure, you might automatically reach for the chocolate for a quick pick-me-up. But if you slow down, you can see there are alternatives.

And one or two of them might even be good for you!

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When you break your diet, a sense of hopelessness can seep in and you’re at risk of continuing to overeat.But fear not, intrepid dieter.

All is not lost if you get straight back on your eating plan after your slip.

Remember, part of the human condition is to make mistakes, and to learn from them. So instead of letting this slip become an all-out free-for-all calorie-laden binge, chalk it up to experience and get straight back on your healthy eating plan.

Don’t let that hollow feeling of hopelessness lure you into comfort eating. You’re not hopeless, and your desire to manage your weight isn’t hopeless. You’re just human.

And you’ll feel so much better when you get back to your original plan.

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From a young age we’re taught to override our off buttons and eat when we’re not hungry to be polite.Does this sound familiar? “Your mother’s spent hours cooking this for you!” And how about this? “But I made this specially for you?”

As children we’re taught to eat food we don’t feel like, or food we don’t like, so other people won’t be offended.

And while this feels like a sensible way to bring up children – teaching them to be aware and attentive to other people’s feelings – it also has a very nasty by-product. It teaches kids how to by-pass their feelings of fullness, and eat when they’re not hungry.

And that can be disastrous. Because once you stop tuning into your bodily cues, it can become second nature to ignore them and overeat when someone else’s feelings are involved.

So apart from making sure you don’t drum this lesson into your own children, what can you do about it?

Re-teach yourself how to pay attention to your cues of satiety and fullness. Tune in to your body, instead of tuning out.

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Re-teach yourself how to pay attention to your cues of satiety and fullness. Tune in to your body, instead of tuning out.

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Check with yourself to see if you’re using food to bury feelings of anger.Burying anger under a couple of layers of food is a very common way of dealing with an emotion that feels unacceptable.

For example, if you’re popping tasty morsels in your mouth because you’ve got so much to do, are you REALLY feeling angry that you’ve got so much to do and no one else seems to notice or even care?

Are you angry about things that have gone wrong in your life, but you’re trying to deal with that anger by pushing it down because it feels like it’s wrong to let yourself be angry?

Anger is just another emotion – like happy. You wouldn’t push happy down because it feels wrong, so why try and get rid of anger?

And before you start arguing with us – anger needs to be expressed like every other emotion. We like anger in our work with our clients – it’s motivating and gets them moving. AND it’s hard to feel depressed when you’re feeling angry.

Note of warning: Some people really struggle with expressing anger. Please seek help from a professional if you suspect you need some support with feelings of anger.

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Choose wisely which voice you listen to: Voice 1 - go on, one won’t matter, or Voice 2 - stop, this is important to you.We all have that little devil on our shoulders tempting us to do things that we don’t want to do.

(All right, we admit it, we were children of the 60s and 70s and grew up with the good pink Jeannie and the bad green Jeannie sitting on Tony Nelson’s shoulders).

But it’s important to connect to that voice of reason that’s trying very hard to keep you on the straight and narrow instead of on a short course to the local pizza joint and the ice cream parlour.

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But it’s important to connect to that voice of reason that’s trying very hard to keep you on the straight and narrow.

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Allowing yourself to feel deprived when you’re dieting is a short road to the next binge.Yep, that’s right. Deprivation is dangerous. (There should be one of those yellow warning signs with a car skidding out of control under the word deprivation on the road.)

But why, we hear you ask? If I stop eating those yummy things I really like that are bad for me, then won’t I lose weight?

Well, you will of course. In the short run.

But long term, you’re going to start feeling resentful that you’re not allowed to eat the things you love eating that everyone else in the entire world (even the starving people in Ethiopia) take for granted as part of their daily snack regime.

And THEN we all know what happens. Don’t we . . .

You become resentful, and that little devil on your shoulder starts whispering in your ear and tempting you to eat, eat, eat. Then before you know it, you’ve opened the flood gates and you’re eating everything in sight.

Take home message?

Don’t deprive yourself. Work treats into your eating plan.

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For permanent weight loss, it’s important to accept yourself, warts and all.And before you start howling us down about how accepting yourself means giving up and swelling to the size of a whale, take a breath and read on . . .

Accepting yourself DOESN’T mean you give up and eat everything in sight. Acceptance means you can acknowledge to yourself that you don’t like your weight, but you can accept that this is where you’re at, for now. Acceptance allows you to let go of the fight, and move on to the next chapter in your life.

You know, that chapter where you lose weight slowly and steadily until you’ve hit your goal. And then you maintain that lost weight.

When you’ve given up the fight, everything becomes that much easier. And we’re not talking about losing control and going on an eating frenzy. We’re talking about giving yourself a break and accepting yourself, warts and all.

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Acceptance means you can acknowledge to yourself that you don’t like your weight, but you can accept that this is where you’re at, for now. It allows you to let go of the fight, and move on to the next chapter in your life.

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Don’t wait until you’ve lost weight. Engage with your life now before it passes you by.What are you waiting for?

Get out and engage with your life right now, not when you’ve lost 10 or 20 or 30 kilos.

Our clients tell us they won’t go on a holiday, won’t go for a new job, won’t go out with friends, or won’t buy a new pair of shoes until they’ve met their diet goals.

But their weight doesn’t go down, or they’ve got so much weight to lose, it feels like they’ll be dieting for a lifetime.

Life’s here for the living – right now. Not in five years’ time.

And what if you don’t lose the weight? Are you going to permanently leave your life on hold?

Don’t let life pass you by while you’re on an endless diet. Give yourself permission to get out and live.

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Unhelpful comments such as, “I’m such a pig”, and “look how fat I am”, have to go.Have some compassion for yourself.

Stop criticising yourself for being overweight. It’s negative, negative, negative, and contrary to popular belief, won’t help you lose weight.

But being negative about yourself will encourage you to come to loathe yourself and the way you look.

It will also pass on an implicit message to your children that it’s okay to hate the way you look and comment publically on it.

And, it will encourage other people to share their opinions about how you look – opinions that would be better kept to themselves (unless they’re being positive and flattering).

Ban the negative commentary, and move on.

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Set a ceiling weight - a maximum weight that you’re comfortable with - and don’t go above it.This is a simple little technique, but one that can be very, very effective. Especially when it comes to holidays or the festive season where weight gain becomes part of the landscape.

Set a maximum weight for yourself, and monitor your weight regularly so you don’t go over it.

For example, if your ceiling weight is 80 kilos, you need to adjust your eating and exercise so your weight remains around 78 or 79 kilos.

And the good news is, that extra kilo or two allows you a little wiggle room . . . for a rainy day or a chocolate emergency.

Then when you’re ready and you diet down a bit, reset your ceiling weight to a lower weight. And commit to staying under your new ceiling.

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Ask yourself what’s going on in your head when you’re confronted with food that isn’t on your eating plan.Check in with yourself when you come face-to-face with something that isn’t on your eating plan.

Do you really want it?

Do you really need it?

Or are you tempted to scoff it down because it’s there and it’s forbidden?

Work out what’s really going on in your head before you give in to temptation.

If you do really want it, then work out how you can compensate so you’re not at risk of wrecking your diet. And before you sit down and enjoy it, commit to going straight back on your eating plan afterwards.

Don’t let this treat turn into a 10-day binge.

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Check in with yourself when you come face-to-face with something that isn’t on your eating plan. Work out what’s really going on in your head before you give in to temptation.

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Identify your sabotaging thoughts and come up with a rebut or refuting statement.When your mind starts sabotaging your best laid diet plans, it’s important to have a couple of refuting statements ready to go.

For example, that little sabotaging voice in your head might say: “I’ve overeaten on the weekend so I may as well keep eating”.

Or “Everyone else is tucking into cakes, it’s not fair, I should be able to as well.”

Or, “I’ve been working hard, I deserve a treat.”

This is sabotage at work, folks. But you can kick sabotage in the butt if you’ve got a couple of statements ready at hand and ready to go.

Such as, “Yes, I know I’ve overeaten all weekend, but that’s not an excuse to keep going. My health and weight are important to me so I’m going to get straight back on my eating plan.”

So work out how you sabotage yourself, and then get your refuting statements ready.

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When you feel hungry between meals, wait it out - hunger pangs ebb and flow over time.If you know you’ve eaten a decent meal one or two hours ago, then you also know you don’t need another meal or endless snacks for another hour or two.

Hunger comes and goes between meals.

And it’s common for some people to confuse hunger pangs with thirst.

Nothing bad will happen to you if you don’t eat the second you feel hungry. Have a glass of water, and wait it out.

It’s important to learn to sit with hunger.

In fact, sitting with hunger is a life skill. If you didn’t learn it when you were a youngster, teach it to yourself now.

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You can kick sabotage in the butt if you’ve got a couple of statements ready at hand and ready to go.

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It’s harder to overeat when you’re eating mindfully.When you slow down and savour every mouthful, you allow yourself to feel satiated.

Eating mindlessly (versus mindfully) feels automatic - it isn’t satisfying, and it’s often guilt ridden. How often have you motored through a pack of something that’s not on your eating plan, yet you’ve hardly tasted it?

All those calories and no pleasure.

Not happy!

Eating mindfully stops all that automatic eating. It brings every bite into your awareness and allows you to really taste it, without the need to feel guilty because you’re eating something forbidden.

And let’s face it, if you’re going to eat chocolate, you deserve to taste it and enjoy it!

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Feelings of shame need to be explored and processed, or they’re likely to sabotage weight management efforts.Shame is a thorny emotion. It’s prickly, uncomfortable, and can have the power to make you downright miserable. Shame is also very, very powerful.

Shame has the power to make you turn to food in order to get some respite, if only for a few moments.

Sometimes, shame works undercover, and is the reason we overeat because it makes us feel better, without really knowing what we’re trying to feel better about.

When this happens, shame has the power to sabotage the best laid diet plans, and send us on a yo-yoing diet cycle, or cause us to give up in despair.

Shame often plays an enormous role in weight management problems. If you suspect that shame has a grip on you (even if it’s only an inkling), work on processing it.

Work out what the deal is with shame, and learn to slide it to one side so you can have the space to focus on your eating plan.

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Shame often plays an enormous role in weight management problems. If you suspect that shame has a grip on you, work on processing it.

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Map the events that lead to binge-eating episodes - with knowledge comes the power to change.So you know that you’re likely to binge eat at night when everyone else has gone to bed.

But do you know why?

Understanding why gives you the power to make changes.

Work out what you were thinking, doing and feeling right before your last binge episode. Chances are one or more of these things will be a trigger for an out-of-control eating episode.

When you work out what the trigger is, you can make some changes.

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Stop eating to distract yourself from feeling bored or sorry for yourself, or when you’re at a loose end.That’s right, we know that’s what you do.

How do we know that? Because pretty much every single one of our clients eats when they don’t know what else to do with themselves.

So make a pact with yourself – RIGHT NOW – to stop yourself reaching for a snack when you’re feeling bored, or feeling sorry for yourself because things aren’t going right, or you’ve got too much to do.

Filling your mouth and sending your jaws into motion doesn’t solve or fix anything. It just delays life for a few moments. And then those feelings will come right on back.

AND you’ll have engaged in one more session of non-hungry eating that’s doing nothing for your waist line, or your self-confidence.

So catch yourself when your hand reaches out, or you’re hovering in the kitchen. Focus on something else instead.

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Learn how to flick your off button and eat only when you’re hungry.If you ate only when you were hungry, and stopped eating when you were full, you wouldn’t struggle with your weight.

Tune into your body, recognise it’s nearing fullness, and flick your off button.

That’s it – stomach closed for the rest of the afternoon. Everyone can go home now.

You switch the lights off when you leave a room, you turn the car off when you reach your destination, and we bet you even turn the TV off when it’s time for bed.

So learn how to switch your eating off when you’re not hungry.

If you’re slowing down enough to recognise when you’re reached satiation, the next step is to close up shop for the day (or until the next meal).

And when that button is flicked to off, you don’t eat until the next planned eating period.

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Recognising the difference between cravings and feeling hungry, is one of the keys to successful weight management.Cravings are seductive – they urge us to eat all sorts of forbidden food at any time of day. And all when we’re not hungry.

Sometimes a craving comes from our head with no obvious trigger. Out of the blue we’ll think, “I know what would be nice! A chocolate bar and a cup of tea!”

Other times we’ll be fully aware of the cues. Walking past a bakery, smelling someone else eating hot chips (why do they smell so darned good?), or an ad on TV.

But it’s important to recognise that cravings have nothing to do with hunger. They’re things you think about, not things you really want or need.

The next time you catch yourself having a craving, ask yourself if it’s something you really want, or if it’s all in your head.

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But it’s important to recognise that cravings have nothing to do with hunger. They’re things you think about, not things you really want or need.

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People who encounter endless obstacles to weight loss are likely to be expert self-saboteurs.Self-sabotage is sneaky and stealthy. When it comes to weight loss, your ability to self-sabotage might be so finely honed that you’re not aware of it.

Identifying a thought that sabotages your diet can take away its power.

How do you do that?

Every time you come up with an excuse to overeat or non-hungry eat, take a note of it, as it’s likely to be self-sabotage at work.

Then when you hear yourself in sabotage mode, catch yourself and expose the saboteur. Like this: “I’m having the thought that it’s okay to eat junk food at 3pm because I’m tired and I’ve been working hard. But that’s my self-sabotage at work, and it’s not okay. I’m going to have that apple and a glass of water instead.”

When you’ve exposed your sabotaging thought, its power is removed. And you have the choice – to continue with the sabotage fantasy, or return to what’s important to you – your weight.

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So many of our clients dress in black because they’re unhappy with their weight.Well we’re here to tell you that it’s time to get out of black and get into colour.

Have some fun! Live a little!

Yes, we know, black is slimming. Yep, we’ve heard all the arguments.

If your size didn’t matter, what colour would you wear? (And you can’t choose black because black isn’t a colour, it’s a shade.)

When you wear a colour you like, it not only visually brightens you up, it also mentally brightens you up.

So experiment, get out of that drab and depressing wardrobe and celebrate the brightness of life.

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When you’ve exposed your sabotaging thought, its power is removed. And you have the choice – to continue with the sabotage fantasy, or return to what’s important to you – your weight.

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Ease up on yourself by stopping the internal criticism.We all have a critical voice at work – a voice in our heads that comments in a negative and judgmental way about everything we do. And when we listen to that critical voice, we feel ashamed and guilty, and can wind up despising ourselves. And when we start feeling bad, where do we turn for comfort?

You’ve guessed it – the fridge, the pantry, or the secret stash in the third drawer down.

Learn to tune out that critical voice. If you’ve tuned in, you also have the option of tuning out. You know it’s never going to say something nice, or flattering, so why are you giving it the time of day?

Draw your mind away from it and focus on good things instead.

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Are you using food to fill up a feeling of emptiness inside you? If so, find other ways to fill that void.If this tip isn’t making sense to you, skip to the next tip. The people we’re talking to here, know who they are. They’re people who feel like there’s an emptiness inside them. Something’s missing, but they don’t know what it is. They just know the emptiness is there, and when it gets bigger, it’s overwhelming.

That’s when they turn to food to try and fill up that emptiness. Of course, filling up that empty space inside with food doesn’t work. Because it’s a psychological emptiness. The key here is to recognise what you’re doing, and find other ways of filling that void.

Some people are fearful of feeling hungry.In fact, when we ask them when was the last time they felt hungry (and we’re not talking peckish here, but really and truly hungry), they look baffled. And they’ll often confess that they can’t remember.

For these people, it often feels like something bad will happen if they get hungry. News flash - nothing bad will happen except you’ll feel hungry. That’s it.

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72.Hunger ebbs and flows and it’s even possible to distract yourself from feeling hungry.

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In fact, hunger ebbs and flows. And it’s even possible to distract yourself from feeling hungry.

Experiment with hunger. Allow yourself to get good and hungry, and then see if it wanes over a couple of hours. Does having a glass of water satisfy your hunger a little?

Now we’re not suggesting you starve yourself – far from it. We’re just saying, give it three or four hours between eating, and see what it’s like.

It’s time to make friends with hunger.

Understand that losing that weight is going to take time, and it’s going to be hard work.That’s right.

No miracle cure.

No magic wand.

No self-control that will suddenly descend from the heavens.

It all comes down to you, and the hard work you’re going to need to put in to lose weight and keep it off.

Our guess is, you didn’t put that unwanted weight on in four weeks. You’ve been slowly and steadily putting it on for months, or years, or even decades.

So getting it off and getting your head around how to keep it off is going to take more than five minutes.

It’s going to take the time it takes, no matter how impatient you are.

So give yourself a break and resign yourself to the hard work and dedication needed to get your weight in the place you want it to be.

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Understand that thinness doesn’t equal happiness. But happiness can make dieting a whole lot easier.That’s right. Our clients all carefully explain to us how much happier they’re going to be when they lose weight.

And sure, they do feel better.

But they also come to realise that their happiness isn’t dependant on their weight, it comes from within.

And importantly, feeling happy actually helps the weight to melt away. That’s because misery encourages us to feed ourselves to feel better. But when you’re happy, you don’t need food in the same way – you don’t need to use food to make you feel happier.

For a lot of people, focusing on happiness IS the path to weight loss success.

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Stop comparing yourself to skinny celebs.Chances are, no matter what you do, you’re never going to look like a Hollywood movie star. The images we see on the TV, the big screen, and in magazines aren’t real anyway.

Yes, they’re real people, but by the time they’ve been coiffed, nipped, tucked and photo shopped, there’s very little real about them.

And what you’re looking at is a person who’s turned themselves into a product and needs to look that way to sell themselves. They don’t have your stresses, your demands, or your life.

If they did, they’d look like you.

Who said we all have to be willow-waisted anyway?

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Feeling happy actually helps the weight to melt away. That’s because misery encourages us to feed ourselves to feel better. But when you’re happy, you don’t need food in the same way – you don’t need to use food to make you feel happier.

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Where to from here

Download our other e-book Emotional Triggers: How to Identify Emotional Triggers to Overeating and How to Work with Them

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ABOUT PS COUNSELLING

Kristina Mamrot – Director & Consulting Psychologist

While working with a broad range of presenting problems, Kristina specialises in working in the PS Weight Management Program with Eating Disorders and Obesity, with adolescents and adults struggling with depression and anxiety, and with women suffering from post-natal depression. She also works with adults to improve parenting skills and in couples counselling.

Kate Swann – Director & Consulting Psychologist

Treating clients across the range of presenting issues at PS, Kate specialises in working with adults and adolescents who have experienced childhood trauma, and are struggling with depression and/or anxiety. She also works with Eating Disorders, Obesity, and Borderline Personality Disorder.

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(03) 9882 88103/650 BURWOOD ROAD

HAWTHORN EAST VIC 3123PSCOUNSELLING.COM.AU

Copyright© Kate Swann & Kristina Mamrot 2015