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THE CORNERSTONE EAGLE
October 2016 Edition
Cornerstone International Groups MISSION is to be the best executive recruiting group worldwide, but
our VISION is to be a true mentor and coach, one-on-one, with our clients, candidates and partners
We believe the way to do it is to promote our 3C VALUES of Community, Credibility, and Continuity. We
succeed when our partners have achieved Healthier Businesses and Lives. The Cornerstone Eagle is not a
sales letter to promote activities of our 70 offices globally, but a 3C tool to inspire you to maximize your
personal and professional potential to be a Better Leader and a Better Person both at home and at
We shall be your Faithful Companion / Coach / Mentor on your life and career journey, supporting you to
discover yourself and offering good advice regarding the SIX important aspects of your professional Life:
Identity, Money, Career Options, Health, Relationships and Your Future (spiritual and your legacy
As we enter the month of October and indeed
the last and 4th quarter of 2016, it reminds us of
our personal life journey as many of us are
entering the 3rd or 4th quarter of our life. It is
time to ask ourselves how can we be more
HAPPY or have JOY in all we do, as there are
profound differences between the two. This
October Eagle will suggest ways we can move
from Happiness to Joy in our lives.
We pray that these powerful wings of the Eagle shall continue to enable you to soar to new heights.
Cornerstone International Group
Phone No.: +86 21 6474 7064 |: [email protected]
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HAPPINESS and JOY
I just want to be happy!"
Asking most people what they want from life gets the same answer, "I just want to be happy."
There is a common belief that happiness is
something that can be achieved and held on to
it. We look forward to that time in which we
can finally be happy, but it continually recedes.
When in high school, we think, "If I can just
graduate then I will be happy." Graduation,
however, is not fulfilling, and we decide "If I go
to college then life will be better." But a college
education does not bring happiness. Maybe it will come upon finding the right job, or getting married, or
having children, or retiring. The goal remains elusive.
The "happiness that lasts" is never found because it is actually impossible to get happy and stay happy. If
life is based on obtaining happiness, then we will always fall short because life is always changing as the
Joy versus Happiness
It is far better to seek "joy." Joy is related to happiness, but it is a deeper experience.
In the search for happiness the individual focuses
upon himself, but joy moves a person out of a
self-centered preoccupation and provides an
orientation towards others.
Joy is an experience which connects us to that
which is "Greater" than we are. It connects us to
the creative power that is more than the "I" or
ego. Joy gets us out of ourselves and in contact
with this "Other" and with others. Joy can sustain
us throughout the different phases of life.
If we are willing to give up the search for happiness, we may find joy.
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Comparison between Happiness and Joy
Happiness is an emotion in which one experiences feelings ranging from contentment and satisfaction to
bliss and intense pleasure.
Joy is a stronger, less common feeling than
happiness. Witnessing or achieving selflessness
to the point of personal sacrifice frequently
triggers this emotion. Feeling spiritually
connected to a god or to people.
Happiness - temporary, based on outward
Joy - lasting, based on inward circumstances.
HOW TO FIND JOY
Aiming for joy is more beneficial when compared with happiness, as it is less transitory and is not tied to
external circumstances. So many of us have lost touch with that feeling, not knowing how to cultivate joy
any more, so we resort to quick fixes like alcohol, drugs and addictive foods, or find fleeting moments of
happiness from other places without truly experiencing it and cultivating it for ourselves, for example by
It can be challenging for us to shift our mindset from one of negative thinking to one of joy, so here are
three things you should be doing to increase the amount of joy in your life:
1. Quieten your mind with meditation.
It's important to be able to tap into your heart rather than your head, your intuition rather than your
thinking mind. Quietening the chatter in your mind and creating space within allows you to listen more
closely to what brings you joy.
2. Cut down on social media.
We are so heavily influenced by what we
'should like/do/have/buy' that this so often is
not in line with what truly brings us joy. For
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many of us, social media has become a necessity in our day. If ditching social media altogether is not an
option, think about how you can cut down on it, for example:
Checking social media sites just twice a day, once mid-morning, so youre not starting your day
with social media, and again late afternoon.
Opting for a maximum of two portals of instant messaging communication that friends and
colleagues can contact you on. I recall a time when an ex-employer was contacting me on text, Wechat,
WhatsApp, Viber, Skype, Facebook Messenger and regular phone calls. Needless to say, it was far too
Choose the people you follow or who appear in your feed wisely. If you like to get your daily
fix of whats happening around the globe, whether it be in world affairs, fashion or self-development, opt
for those who inspire you, not those who bring you down.
3. Keep a journal and practise gratitude for the things that bring you joy.
Cultivate gratitude wherever possible and even have gratitude for the things that challenge you, as these
help you to grow and build strength. This also helps to define what brings you joy and what doesnt.
In your journal, at the end of each day, write a list of 10 things that
you are grateful for that day, it can be anything. Celebrate and
recognise these aspects of your day. Soon you will see running
themes, and when you do, intersperse your day with more of the
good stuff and less of the 'not so good' stuff.
Having an attitude of gratitude makes us more appreciative and
trusting, gives us better self-esteem and helps us bounce back
from stress. It allows us to view the world, and our situation
within this world, in a more positive, healthy way.
Just embrace the simple
experiences and pleasures.
When we're moving at
100mph, we take the simple things for granted. These are often the
things that top up our feelings of joy. When you're more present,
the simpler things become joyful; the food you eat, the air you
breathe, the sounds of nature.
The more people get in touch with their true self, the less they feel
the need to seek from external influences to experience momentary happiness. Joy becomes a more
constant state of being, it no longer becomes about what does or doesn't bring you joy, as you begin to
cultivate joy from the inside out.
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All of the above are learnings from Diffen, Wheel of Life, Rachel Fearnley and Psychologies
HAPPINESS AND JOY QUOTES
Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears.
If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.
Rules for Happiness: something to do, someone to
love, something to hope for.
The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.
To get the full value of joy you must have someone to
divide it with.
If I can see pain in your eyes then share with me your
tears. If I can see joy in your eyes then share with me
From the Bible:
Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine
righteous persons who need no repentance. (Jesus speaking in the parable of the lost sheep)
These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full."
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"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness."
Our Editor, Nancy Chu at [email protected] would love to hear from you if you have
special thoughts to share.
About Cornerstone International Group
Cornerstone International Group takes pride in its 25 years in executive search and as trusted advisors to
CEOs. A global member of the Association of Executive Search and Leadership Consultants (AESC),
Cornerstone is recognized among those having the highest level of quality in the executive search industry.