In this issue //

sports

Hockey report card p. 15

life arts

Encounters of the Indian kind p.10

music

Q&A with Islands p.12

Neknoms are shameful p. 16

theconcordian.comWe tell your stories. Follow us on Twitter: @TheConcordian

Coffee date leaves bad taste p. 7

opinions

Volume 31 Issue 24 March 11, 2014IndependenT sTudenT neWspaper aT ConCordIa unIVersITy. sInCe 1983.

theconcordian

Photo by Keith Race

Marching against provincial and federal austerity measures

Page 3

Event // NEws

student politics// NEws

newswrite to the editor: news@theconcordian.com

2 // Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014

MIlos KovACEvICAssistant news editor

CITY

The CBC has reported Montreal Mayor Denis Coderre thinks Montreal is ready for 6 a.m. last calls, and said a pilot project should begin to test the valid-ity of the hypothesis. The prospect of extending bar hours, currently set at 3 a.m., was naturally met with enthu-siasm by associations and businesses that stand to benefit from the longer hours. Others have disagreed, saying the extension will increase public mis-chief, noise, and intoxication.

>> Montreal Mulling nightlife

extension

>> Panda on the Ballot

Montrealers (and others) familiar with 2012’s prolonged protests over tuition fees will immediately recognize An-archopanda as one of the unofficial mascots of the movement. The Mon-treal Gazette reports that the man be-hind the costume, Julien Villeneuve, is contemplating entering mainstream provincial politics – surely an irony considering his anarchist leanings. The CÉGÉP philosophy professor is currently suing the provincial govern-ment over last year’s controversial P-6 bylaw which prohibited face masks and required protesters to reveal their routes to the authorities.

>> Yellow line shutdown

>> hunger strike for lev tahor

The next six months will see Montre-al’s yellow metro line, covering Parc Jean-Drapeau and Longeuil, closed completely on weekends for tunnel repairs in a move that will surely tax the patience and nerves of commut-ers. The Montreal Gazette reports that in addition to the regular routes ferrying passengers to and from the South Shore, the STM will provide additional shuttle busses in place of metro service.

Since Saturday, two teens part of the ultra-Orthodox Jewish sect of Lev Ta-hor, which has been under scrutiny in recent weeks, have been on a hunger strike. According to CJAD, the young women, aged 14 and 16 refuse to be sent into foster care, preferring the care of their parents, which is the rea-son for their protest. Unfortunately, the older of the two is in hospital in critical condition.

CASA Cares puts on annual fashion show

‘An avenue for productive discussions’

Proceeds to benefit the Montreal Children’s Hospital Foundation

Providing student associations with the opportunity to work together

sloANE MoNtgoMEryNews editor

AMANdA l. sHorEEditor-in-chief

On Thursday, March 27, CASA Cares has plans to take you from Paris to Berlin for their 11th annual fashion show “Come Away With Me” to ben-efit the Montreal Children’s Hospital Foundation.

The event will be held at Arena nightclub from 9 to 11 p.m. with an afterparty to follow. The show will present the 2014 spring and summer collections of various Canadian de-signers. Throughout the past decade, CASA Care’s fashion shows have raised and donated over $96,000 to the Montreal Children’s Hospital Foundation.

CASA Cares is the non-profit seg-ment of the Commerce and Adminis-tration Student Association (CASA) at Concordia University’s John Molson School of Business.

“We hope to reach our goal of $110,000 by the end of our 11th year,” said CASA Cares’ President, Melissa Payette. “The 17 members of the CASA Cares association have been

The first Concordia Student Congress was held last week wherein represen-tatives from student associations and faculties gathered with representatives from the CSU to discuss issues related to being an undergraduate student at Concordia.

“We had a pretty good turn out. I was pretty happy. We had I think over 20 associations or student groups from all four faculties,” said Gene Morrow, VP academic and advocacy, who was a primary facilitator of the event. “Ev-erybody was really able to have very frank and constructive discussions

split up into task teams, working hard to get all the work done.”

The association hired some out-side help; Natalie Solomon and Myr-iam Feltham-Lauzon will be working as VP Fashion Sponsorship and model co-ordinator, respectively, along with 25 volunteers.

Payette was excited to announce that all 31 models participating in the event have set up donations pages to raise extra funds for the Montreal Chil-dren’s Hospital Foundation, which has never been done in previous years.

Not all of the designers have been finalized as of yet, but some confirmed highlights will be Dylan Ribkoff, Aqua Di Lara, New Regime, Red Factory, and Annie 50.

The association has themed and organized the entire fashion show from décor to lighting to provide at-tendees with the feeling of a 24-hour European getaway. The show will start off in Paris proceeding to a beach in Barcelona for the afternoon, then on to London for dinner, finishing off the night with a rave in Berlin. The cloth-ing has been chosen specifically to reflect the fashion needs of all these situations.

about the challenges of being an un-dergraduate student at Concordia.”

Antonin Picou, president of the Engineering and Computer Science Association, felt that this was a posi-tive initiative in bringing to light issues that all faculties and associations face.

“It was really productive, we brought up a lot of points that were valid to all faculties and initiated dis-cussions and got to have a feel for how they reacted to them and it was reassuring to know that we’re not the only ones that were having these prob-lems,” he said.

During the March 6 meeting, the student congress adopted several proposals directed at the university administration. The proposals collec-tively asked the university to address

The event will also have a photo booth and a silent auction.

The auction is being sponsored with prizes from MAC make-up, Lulu-lemon, tickets for Bal en Blanc, and a hockey stick signed by the entire Habs hockey team.

The Montreal Children’s Hospital Foundation was established in 1973 with the mission “to support excel-lence in care at The Montreal Chil-dren’s Hospital of the McGill Univer-sity Health Centre.” The money raised

their concerns regarding “student in-volvement in university governance,” “student evaluation of professors mid-semester,” “budgetary cuts to the aca-demic sector,” the “intellectual prop-erty policy,” “co-operative education programs,” and “student space.”

The proposition regarding student involvement in university governance, asked that in order for students to be able to participate meaningfully in the governing of the university, that the administration guarantee that depart-ments notify departmental student associations about the date, time and location of departmental council meet-ings, as well as send out minutes from previous meetings and “the agenda for the one being called.” As well they asked that “every department at the university should have at least one (1) Student association representative sitting on its departmental council. Student representatives should be al-lowed full speaking, voting, and mov-ing privileges as full members of the council.” Furthermore, they require that member associations have the opportunity to speak with respective department chairs so that they might discuss “improving student represen-tation on department councils.”

The proposals also spoke to what they felt student groups could do to ad-

from the annual fashion shows goes towards an emergency fund within the foundation.

For more in depth information on the The Montreal Children’s Hospital Foundation, check out the hospital’s website at http://childrenfoundation.com/your-gifts-at-work/most-urgent-needs.php

For more information and to purchase your ticket visit https://www.facebook.com/events/482789141820543/

dress some of their concerns.The congress is asking that stu-

dent groups petition their “respective faculty councils or their professors” for informal mid-semester evaluations of professors, “in addition to the one in-cluded at the end of the semester.”

They are also calling on student representatives to talk to their faculty councils about the space needs of their members.

Additionally, as the congress was made up of faculty associations and the CSU, they collectively resolved to work with the dean of students in order “to develop and provide train-ing to student leaders in the areas of respectful conduct, identifying trouble-some situations and positive interven-tion thereon, and crowd management, with the goal of ensuring that delete-rious actions or situations do not oc-cur.”

Morrow was pleased with how the event turned out and has plans to put together a full briefing on the experience in the hopes that it will be re-initiated by his successor.

“I think we demonstrated that this could be an avenue for productive political discussions to occur. We had representatives from all four faculties and everybody was able to bring an important perspective to the process.”

The CASA CAreS exeCuTive TeAm proudly preSenT “Come AwAy wiTh me”

City // NEws

Event // NEws

3 Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 //

NATION

ElIzAbEtH toMArAsCopy editor

A door-to-door hot water tank salesman has been charged with forcible confinement and uttering threats, among other charges, after entering a home and attacking an 11-year-old girl, according to the National Post. Police arrested 19-year-old Daniel Wight shortly after the girl escaped and ran to neighbours, informing them to call the authorities. The child said she heard a knock at the door of her Burlington, Ont. home and then saw the door open which is when she tried to hide. Wight allegedly grabbed the girl, put his hand over her mouth and told her not to scream, and that he wouldn’t hurt her. Initially, the salesman left the victim’s house after her parents declined his services but returned once he saw the adults leave the residence.

There may soon be a blood test that will inform individuals of their potential to develop Alzheimer’s, reports The Globe and Mail. Researchers tested the lipid levels of 525 seniors in New York and California and found that when an individual had lower than normal levels of 10 specific lipids they were 90 per cent likely to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or some form of mild cognitive impairment. However, because there is no cure as of yet for Alzheimer’s, this development forces the question of whether it is better to know of the inevitability or to remain blissfully unaware of what lies ahead.

>> salesPerson in hot water after alleged attack

>> checking Blood for

alzheiMer’sdisease

>> daY of fun turns deadlY in

alBerta

An avalanche has killed two snow-shoers after they were buried near Lake Louise in Alberta, reported the National Post. While three oth-ers survived, they managed to pull one of the two snowshoers out of the snow and call for help via cell phone. The four were then air-lift-ed out of the danger zone which triggered another two avalanches. According to Banff National Park, the combination of favourable weather for this natural disaster poses a serious avalanche risk at all elevations.

Protest march against austerity measures

ConU supports 5 Days for the homeless

opposing the measures implemented by provincial and federal governments

volunteer to be homeless for one night to support youth at risk

NIColE yEbACoNtrIbutor

wAyNE rAdFordContributor

On March 4, people gathered out-side Mont-Royal metro at 6:30 p.m. for the protest “Together Against Austerity” (Ensemble contre l’austerité! Harper, Marois, même combat!) organized by the Comité d’action solidaire contre l’austerité (CASA).

According to the Financial Times Lexicon, “Austerity measures refer to official actions taken by the government, during a period of adverse econom-ic conditions, to reduce its budget deficit using a combination of spending cuts or tax rises.”

CASA encouraged peo-ple to bring pans, placards and noisemakers, which people did. The protest had about 50 participants.

One of the protestors present, a foreign worker and also a member of the Immigrant Workers Centre (IWC), explained that in

Thousands of Canadian youth under the age of 25 call the cold and hos-tile streets their home each and every night. Josh Redler wants you to know what that feels like, literally, at Con-cordia’s doorstep. From March 9 to 14, 26 Canadian universities, includ-ing Concordia, will be participating in the 5 Days For the Homeless cam-paign.

Organized annually by Redler and a growing team of volunteers since 2008, 5 Days for the Homeless sup-ports organizations and social groups that aid youth at risk. The event is a simultaneous campaign of visibil-

his home country of Spain, auster-ity has put a lot of people in debt.

“The facts are that after four years of austerity, there is 27 per cent of children in Spain that are below the line of poverty. This was the 12th economy of the world or so they say, like six or seven years ago.”

“The tax system is for the rich and against the poor.” (Fiscalité pour les riches et contre les pau-vres). “The solution would be to not do like Martine Desjardins.” said Justin Arcand, one of the

ity, public awareness and fundraising support for local organizations that directly fight the challenge of home-lessness in their communities.

Ask Redler why he wants you to do this, and he will explain with patience and compassion that our social understanding of the problem of homelessness needs to change, to be challenged, and to be addressed as a growing social concern. In 2007, while Redler was completing his bachelor’s degree in commerce at John Molson School of Business, he started an overnight effort on campus with a few fellow students. That effort has since developed into the annual 5 Days For the Homeless campaign.

From British Columbia to Nova Scotia, this national campaign has been challenging assumptions, shar-

ing experiences, and opening discussions of understanding on what it means to be homeless in Canada; by offering students the

spokesperson of the association pour une solidarité syndicale étudi-ante (ASSÉ). Desjardins, the former president of the University Student Federation of Québec (FEUQ) spent months fighting against the tuition increase during the Maple Spring in 2012. However, she has decided to join the Parti Québecois. Ar-cand does not understand how she fought against tuition increase and now joins a party who is proposing increases.

As the protest-

opportunity to engage directly in the harsh environment of sleeping on the street, and by sharing experience and understanding with the homeless in their own communities.

This is the mission behind 5 Days.ca — to establish understanding of the problem, and to provide a national focus and fundraising effort for those who work in the field of outreach and support for the homeless.

The need is essential. Homeless-ness is on the rise. Globally, since 2008, with the ongoing recession, economic fallout, and stagnation that continues to plague North America, more and more individuals are fall-ing short economically. Government funding in Canada, by best estimates, only accounts for about five per cent of the operating budgets for outreach services in this area of community service.

The underlying cause of home-lessness is not necessarily what one

ers left the metro area to walk on Mont-Royal Avenue, the police de-clared the march illegal. Police cars surrounded the area. The protest ended shortly after 7:30 p.m. on Mont-Royal Avenue just by De Lo-rimier Street.

The ASSÉ will be organizing another protest against austerity on April 3 at 2 p.m. at Émilie-Gamelin Park by Berri-Uqam metro.

might expect. There are some as-sumed circumstances: people fleeing domestic abuse, falling into social iso-lation, or the traps of substance abuse or mental illness. While these situa-tions can compound the problem of homelessness, it often starts with social isolation or the inability for an individual to meet their economic or social responsibilities through crisis or sickness.

Once out of a fixed environment, it becomes increasingly difficult to contact them, or to establish a rou-tine or access government or social services that may be of assistance. When combined with the limitation of accessibility to services with the further consequences of homeless-ness — poor nutrition, poor sleep, and compounding health concerns — the situation rapidly deteriorates into a self-defeating spiral.

“Homeless people are just people in different circumstances,” Redler suggests. “It is helpful for us to see homelessness in the community for what it is, a circumstance, and not the end destiny for an individual. The key, is in establishing compassionate understanding for the person in their circumstances.”

“By establishing rapport, and re-lationships with individuals, they can begin to depend on help, and trust that there is a way out of their present situation, but it can take time. It is a process, not easily solved overnight. If we start by understanding the prob-lem, and supporting organizations that actively outreach to the home-less, we can help solve this problem one person at a time.”

What can you do to help?Here’s a quick checklist of things you can do this week to assist this cause.

- Support fundraising efforts that are in direct aid of “Dans La Rue” and “Chez Dora” — Montreal organizations that directly assist street youth and homeless wom-en. Cash donations welcome.- Bring warm food, or beverages, at 6:30 p.m. for volunteers, and participants, at the corner of Mac-kay and DeMaisonneuve, at the Hall building, SGW Campus.- Offer to spend at least one night on the street, at the corner of Mackay and DeMaisonneuve, at the Hall building, SGW Campus, gathering at 7 p.m.. Conu And oTher CAnAdiAn univerSiTieS SupporT The 5 dAyS CAmpAign.

proTeSTorS on monT-royAl. phoToS by: KeiTh rACe.

theconcordian4 // Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014

>> tatars Pull out of secession

vote

>> north korea’s kiM wins it all

>> MYsterious MalaYsian MishaP

>> Big Bananas

MIlos KovACEvICAssistant news editor

WORLD

Campus // NEws

The Tatar ethnic minority of the Crimea has announced a boy-cott of the upcoming referendum poised to turn the peninsula into Russia’s newest province, says the BBC, citing past persecutions un-der the Soviet Union and fear of returning under Moscow’s power. The Tatars make up around 15 per cent of the population of Crimea and are a Muslim Turkic-speaking people who face discrimination and hostility from the Ukrainian/Russian majority, despite being native to the peninsula for centu-ries. The vote will take place on March 16.

Bloomberg has reported a bil-lion dollar merger reached be-tween Banana-behemoth Chiq-uita and Irish counterpart Fyffes Plc towards the creation of the world’s biggest banana compa-ny. After the merging, Chiquita-Fyffes Plc will own 14 per cent of the global banana trade, or about $4.6 billion worth of ba-nanas a year.

The CBC has reported North Korean leader Kim Jong-un win-ning 100 per cent of the vote in his district after North Koreans went to the polls last weekend to elect members to the country’s highest legislative body, the Su-preme People’s Assembly. Unlike elsewhere, the vote consisted of a simple “Yes” or “No” ballot for the single representative of each district, and occurs once every five years.

Three days later, uncertainty surrounds the disappearance of Malaysia Airlines’ Flight 370. Though an oil slick had been discovered, it did not come from the aircraft and now investiga-tions on debris found near Honk Kong are being conduct to con-firm its origin, CNN reports. While many questions remain unanswered in terms of what happened to the plane, concerns over its passengers — who they were and what became of them — are being raised as two men on the flight were using stolen passports, according to CBC.

Construction to be conpete by April 2017

EvAN sCAMMEllstaff writer

Webster Library renovation plan unveiled

Guylaine Beaudry, Concordia’s in-terim university librarian, has un-veiled the renovation and expansion proposal for the R. Howard Webster Library, which focuses its concern on the university’s growing number of students and lack of study space.

On March 4 at the J.W. McCon-nell building, a one-hour informa-tion session was held by Beaudry to discuss and set forth the renovation proposal to the board and devise a plan to improve the library space. The board acknowledged the issues presented and allowed Beaudry to begin by creating a proposal, which she shared with the student and staff attendees at the information sessions, (another one was held at the Loyola campus in the Vanier Library on Fri-day, March 7).

Beaudry has been working with students and gaining a lot of feed-back through surveys using LibQual — an online library service survey — focus groups, and other means to find out how Concordians feel about their space.

One of the many comments ex-pressed by current Concordia stu-

dents is that “it is often difficult to find space in the library during exam periods.”

The Webster Library is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week and currently accommodates 1.8 million visits per year and six to 12 thou-sands visits per day, but Beaudry stresses that these numbers are going up at an accelerating rate; in February the library was averaging over 12,000 visits per day, which is supposed to be a relatively slow time of year.

Within a 20-year period, from 1992 to 2012, the population of stu-dents attending Concordia has nearly tripled going from 16,000 to 45,000.

In the proposal produced by Be-audry, the goal is to increase the over-all space of the library by 27 per cent and the number of seats by 114 per cent, from 1,550 to 3,400.

Another addition to study space Beaudry would like to see is in the Grey Nun’s residence building, with plans to turn the chapel into a study hall.

Beaudry expressed that she is not only concerned with the amount of space at the library but also its ac-commodations for a certain kind of learning environment. One student expressed in a LibQual survey that there’s “not enough space to study and do teamwork.” Beaudry ex-plained that a more “collaborative learning environment” is necessary.

In the proposal, all of the different types of study spaces were grouped into 11 different categories: tables for

silent study, carrels for silent study, tables with desktop computers, social areas, group study rooms, presenta-tion practice rooms, graduate student study spaces, classroom and tech-nology sandbox, conciliation rooms, seminar rooms, and zero-noise rooms. In the group study rooms there would be whiteboard surfaces, television screens, speakers, podiums (for practicing presentations), and hook-ups for laptop or tablet devices; the zero-noise rooms would be made out of soundproof glass; more ‘social areas’ or lounge areas would be add-ed; and the seminar room would be like the group study room, but much bigger, with more seats and a bigger space.

Beaudry explained that not only a change in the number of collabora-tive study spaces would be needed but also a “response to the revolu-tionary changes in information tech-nology.” Concordia’s Webster Library currently has 200 laptops and 75 tab-lets available for rent; Beaudry spoke of doubling that number and dou-bling the number of desktop comput-ers as well.

There have also been issues raised with students having to book study rooms through CLUES. Be-audry explained that CLUES was only designed to take out books and proposes the installation of digital booking modules onto each respec-tive study room.

The digital device would be much like a small tablet or phone so

students could punch in which time they would like to reserve the study room. The proposal also requests that 3D printers be available for all Concordia students to use. Addition-ally, the request for ‘visualization rooms’ that use multiple projectors to create a 360 degree image around one room to immerse the student into an environment using pictures and videos provided by the user was presented.

Beaudry described both visual and aesthetic reforms to take place if the proposal goes through, involv-ing a change in the colour scheme of the space, incorporating more neutral colours (white, black, grey, and wood), along with different shades of maroon, red and pink.

One of the most important things, Beaudry explained, is the presence of natural light; the use of glass instead of brick and mor-tar will be highly stressed.

“We have to see joy in the space,” said Beaudry.

Along with a few other tweaks, like the incorporation of plants and having the book drop at the front of the entrance, the plans for the Webster Library renovations are just about finished. The board will make their decision in Octo-ber 2014 and the proposed project is estimated to be finished in Au-gust of 2017 if accepted.

If you would like to give feed-back, email Guylaine Beaudry at guylaine.beaudry@concordia.ca.

5tuEsdAy, MArCH 11, 2014 //

life Concordia // lIFE

JulIA vo Contributor

Are you an awkward communicator? Don’t worry, there’s a fix for that. As a member of Concordia Toastmasters, I am here to tell you that they have been helping people improve their communication skills for over 15 years at Concordia University.

So what is Toastmasters?Toastmasters is a worldwide organiza-

tion with more than 292,000 members in 122 countries and can be described as the ‘uni-versity’ of public speaking and leadership.

Nervousness, increased heart rate, mind going blank, and even sweaty palms. If you have ever spoken in front of a large audi-ence chances are that you’ve experienced these bodily symptoms. Ever look around during a class presentation and realize that everybody’s either falling asleep or playing with their iPhones? Yes, this is an organiza-tion that can actually transform you into the amazing Chuck Norris of public speaking that you were always meant to be.

A master communicator by the name of Dale Carnegie (a Toastmaster himself) once said, “Fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind.” Then, why is it that it is so com-monly professed that for many people the fear of public speaking is greater than the

students can turn to toastmasters Concordia to help with their public speaking skills

write to the editor: life@theconcordian.com

fear of death? Aside from dying of embar-rassment, nothing fatal has ever happened to someone giving a speech.

At any given meeting, people will try their hand at giving toasts, telling a joke, giving a speech, or even critiquing a speech, all in front of an audience. There are many

facets of communication that can be honed and individuals who become members of Toastmasters are given manuals with proj-ects to be completed that will guide a person on their way to becoming rock star commu-nicators.

Effective communication skills can help

a person in all areas of life. Regardless of which path you follow, your success can be largely attributed to your ability to communi-cate effectively. For instance, great commu-nication skills is what will help you ace that highly coveted job interview. In addition, it can even improve your love life. The fear of rejection or being judged, nervousness, not knowing what to say, are similar challenges faced, whether you are addressing an audi-ence, potential employer, or a hottie with a body.

Jumping out of a plane is not the only way to satisfy a craving for adrenaline. Try being called up at random to make an impromptu speech in front of a room full of people who will judge you on things like grammar, body movements, and tone of voice. Unless you have Superman-worthy nerves of steel, you will come out of it feeling like you just won at a round of Russian Roulette.

Graduate students at Concordia can at-tend five Concordia Toastmasters meetings as a workshop offered through GradProSk-ills. However, being a student is not a re-quirement to join as Concordia Toastmasters is open to the general public but students do get a sweet discount on membership.

Concordia Toastmasters meets every Monday from 6:30 p.m. - 8:30 p.m. in the Hall building in room H-400. More infor-mation can be found at concordia.toast-mastersclubs.org

Shed the nerves and become a master of the toast

Health // lIFE

everyone AT ToASTmASTerS meeTingS geTS prACTiCe giving prepAred SpeeCheS And im-prompTu preSenTATionS, Known AS TAble TopiCS.

A new weight loss tool to help fight the bulge Concordia alumnus, daniel Eamer, teaches tools for weight loss with new book

Back in January of 1985, Daniel Eamer’s New Year’s resolution was to get in shape. Unlike most of the people who pick this resolution, Eamer kept his promise.

His combination of fitness, proper eating, and training worked so well that he discov-ered a new passion, and decided to become a personal trainer. He completed a bachelor of science degree in exercise science at Con-cordia in 1995, and now holds the title of Certified Strength and Conditioning Special-ist (CSCS) through the National Strength and Conditioning Association based in the United States.

It’s safe to say that, in the last 28 years of working as a personal trainer, and having done lots of research, Eamer has learned a lot about weight loss and building muscle mass. His newest book, The Fat Burner Secrets, is the program Eamer felt was missing from the market. He was also sick of the lack of user-friendly information and the excess of inac-curate information available on weight loss.

“I never saw a book that did it the way I wanted it to be done, so I created the product that I wanted at the time. It gives people the

NAtHAlIE lAFlAMMEProduction manager

information they can use. It’s based on real world experiences, based on 28 years of con-versations and experimentation. It’s based on the real world,” Eamer said.

It took him 17 years to complete the book. The Fat Burner Secrets is very different from a typical weight loss book; it follows fic-tional characters, Dan and Michelle, who are struggling to lose weight. The book teaches readers how to exercise and how to eat, and teaches them the Food Filters tool®, which teaches the reader to become a virtual food analysis expert. With simple lifestyle and ex-ercise changes, Dan and Michelle completely transform their bodies.

The humorous story helps readers associ-ate with the problems at hand and gets them to read the entire book.

“A lot of clients told me that it worked, that they read the book from the beginning to the end,” Eamer said. “I wanted to give it life, it’s real people talking about real challenges and real issues, and having real suggestions and real solutions.”

Eamer’s other book, The Muscle Builder Secrets, follows the same characters, tying in the stories. Eamer is currently working on a third book which will also follow the same format and characters, which will concen-trate on aging, especially for the baby boom-er generation.

One of Eamer’s main criteria for the pro-gram was that it had to be simple. The pro-gram involves no counting of calories or por-tion weighing; there is no math involved. He also wanted the program to adapt to people’s individual needs, and to compliment other programs available.

“It would be very big headed of myself to think of this as the ultimate program,” Eamer said. “It’s not the ultimate program because that might be a combination of two or three different approaches. The book helps people create their personal approach.”

His advice for Concordia students who are struggling with weight gain is quite simple: prepare your own food, and go to the gym between classes.

“I took control of the situation by prepar-ing my meals in advance. I would leave in the morning with two to three complete meals with me. I could control what I put into my system,” Eamer said.

He also said that he would go to the gym on campus between classes, even when he only had a 45-minute break. This combina-tion of techniques helped him stay fit during school.

When it comes to losing weight, Eamer believes two things are key: “Don’t accept what people are telling you. Study. Get the in-formation, the real information. Get informed,

and have patience with the process.”To learn more about Daniel Eamer and

his methods, or to download the first two chapters of The Fat Burner Secrets, visit dan-ieleamer.com.

dAniel eAmer’S new booK offerS AlTernATive ApproACh To weighT loSS.

6 // tuEsdAy, MArCH 11, 2014

Profile // lIFE

For meaning of best, look no further than Concordia’s resident terminologistConcordia’s Philippe Caignon on his nomination as one of Canada’s best teachers

MIlos KovACEvICAssistant news editor

There are several ways of getting the defini-tion of ‘best’. You could consult a dictionary or phone a friend. Or you could consult Con-cordia professor Philippe Caignon. Not only is it his job to study words but, since winning the 2014 3M National Teaching Fellowship for outstanding university teaching, he’s become recognized as one of Canada’s best.

Caignon is, alongside nine others, the most recent recipient of the nation’s highest honour attainable by university instructors, and is only the latest in a long string of Concordia win-ners.

Currently the chair of Le Département d’études françaises (French Studies Depart-ment), Caignon is a translator, linguist, and, above all, a terminologist. At its most basic, ter-minology is the study of specialized languages in such fields as mathematics, marketing, or journalism. Terminologists bear the important task of maintaining mutual intelligibility in any one field by creating and updating corpuses of terms. Our choice of language also showcases, solidifies, and sometimes betrays not just our education or occupation, but culture, socio-economic milieu, and geographic or cultural origins. Those who understand these links, Caignon mischievously and only half-seriously claims, can “secretly control the world.”

He ascribes his winning teaching formula to the awareness of limitations of the standard, teacher-focused pedagogy. For him teaching should be centred on students.

“The difference is very simple. When you are teacher focused, you are a prof who asks ‘what do I have to do to make them learn’? When you’re student oriented, it’s the other way around. You ask, ‘what do they have to

do to learn’? All I do is give them the tools so that they become independent in their learning [and that] they can learn on their own. I simply guide them on their way.”

His award-winning teaching method heav-ily utilizes blogs and wikis, and encourages students to learn from each other by giving ex-tra credit to students who provide and ask for help. Students are also told there is no one way to the right answers: like vertices that become a web by the application of threads between them, each student has their own unique web mapping out term relations and word concepts. So long as theirs are robust and can be logically and consistently explained, he’s content.

This relationship creates a deep respect be-tween him and his students:

“I adore them. I admire them a lot. Every-thing [the students are] going through, I’ve been there. I had the same choices and I can give a little bit of experience and wisdom but this is what I think is really important. I remem-ber the fear of going out of university, going to the job market, and I don’t want my students to go through that phase without knowing there’s somebody else [who can help them] …They’ll always be my students, regardless of their [ultimate] domain,” he said.

Caignon’s talents are well-placed. Concor-dia’s French studies program is the only one in the country to teach the full trifecta of trans-lation, literature, and linguistics. Even without considering Concordia’s robust attention to the French language, it is fitting the award came to Concordia when it did, as it was here that Caignon first became inspired to teach the way he does.

Some years ago, just around the time Cai-gnon was making the transition to full-time teaching, he enrolled in a quick teaching tu-torial at the Center for Teaching and Learning Services (CTLS). The experience opened his eyes to the possibilities.

“I was really amazed [with what I learned in the class]. I told [CTLS acting director] Jea-nette Barrington, ‘you’ve rocked my world’. Her competency was so wonderful, so cool.”

In addition to becoming a Fellow for life, Caignon will embark next November to a re-treat at Alberta’s idyllic Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel to mingle and exchange with his fellows on professional and personal topics amidst the stunning backdrop of the country’s oldest na-tional park.

Caignon is self-effacing in all ways but one: his unabashed love for his vocation. He’d like nothing more than to teach and learn from a greater number of students, and takes the time to plug some friendly advertising.

“Terminology is the best in the world,” he laughs, pointing out that despite the most com-

plex of algorithms used by artificial translators a computer will never be able to accurately translate the rich meanings of language. Trans-lators will always be needed.

All crowns weigh heavy in their own way, though. Those wishing to embark on such a seemingly rewarding path will have to prepare for certain sacrifices. Firstly, your friends won’t appreciate, and may become exasperated by, your talents.

“Nobody is going to want to speak with them,” he said, quipping about the inevitable descent into language nitpicking and gram-mar policing. Secondly, don’t expect your love of words to do you any favours in a game of Scrabble or Boggle, either.

“People don’t want me to play. I’m forbid-den to play a lot of games with my family.”

philippe CAignon iS nominATed for A preSTigiouS 3m nATionAl TeAChing fellowShip.

Editors at The Concordian are responsible for pitching stories on a weekly basis that are rele-vant and interesting to Concordia students and editing story submissions according to section criteria and Canadian Press Style standards. In addition, editors are asked to assist writers in producing their best work, encourage writ-ers to pitch story ideas, as well as participate in weekly story and production meetings.

EDITOR-IN-CHIEFThe Editor-in-Chief is responsible for the pro-duction of the paper on a weekly basis. Re-sponsibilities include managing section edi-tors, copy and content editing, establishing and maintaining deadline schedules and ensuring that the overall presentation of the paper meets journalistic standards of publication.

PRODUCTION MANAGERThe Production Manager is responsible for the visual presentation of articles and images as produced by The Concordian. Each week, the Production Manager orders pages from the printer and lays out how articles will appear on the page.

NEWS EDITORThe News section covers news which are im-portant to Concordia students. This includes but is not limited to: Concordia events, politics, student activities, and local or national news that is relevant to Concordia students.

LIFE EDITORThe Life section contains stories designated as “features.” Topics in the Life section include but are not limited to: personal narratives, health, fitness, beauty, fashion, extracurricular activities, trends and relationships.

ARTS EDITORThe Arts section covers all events and topics that fall into the ‘art’ category, such as, visual art, theatre, improv, dance, literature and film.

MUSIC EDITORThe Music section is responsible for covering artists and bands that are of interest to Concor-dia students.

SPORTS EDITORThe Sports section covers all sports events at Concordia.

OPINIONS EDITORThe Opinions section allows student writers the opportunity to provide a compelling and thought-provoking arguments on topics of in-terest.

PHOTO EDITORThe photo editor is responsible for all photo-graphic media used in the paper. They will take photos as requested by editors as well as give out photo assignments to photographers.

GRAPHICS EDITORThe graphics editor is responsible for creating the graphic art material used in the paper. They will be asked by editors to illustrate stories for their section.

COPY EDITOR(S)Copy editors are responsible for ensuring that all articles are written according to Canadian Press Style and Canadian English grammar standards.

PRODUCTION ASSISTANTSProduction assistants help the production man-ager to layout the newspaper each week with the application InDesign.

ONLINE EDITORThe Online editor is in charge of uploading all articles to our website, in addition to using Twitter, Facebook, and other social media to interact with our readers.

The Concordian is hiring!All positions are open for the 2014-2015 academic year

Submit your cover letter, CV and three samples of your work to applications@theconcordian.com no later than March 16.

*To apply you must be a registered student for 2014-2015.

7tuEsdAy, MArCH 11, 2014 //

Personal narrative // lIFE

One for the books: the coffee date from hell A personal account of how awkward small talk and Colombian dark roast is a bad combo

JEssICA roMErAMusic editor

He was late, and not the socially acceptable couple-of-minutes-because-the-bus-was-late kind of late. He was exactly 26 minutes late. This was a bad start to a date

I very reluctantly accepted to go on in the first place.

Sitting by the window at the new Second Cup around the corner from my house, I grew increas-ingly aggravated. I decided to go ahead and order myself a medium latte. Adding cinnamon powder to my artfully crafted latte with the heart-shaped foam, I felt a quick, unsure tap on my shoulder.

“Jess?”I turned around. My hazy, alcohol-induced

first memory of meeting him at some random par-ty returned with a whopping bang. He removed his black aviator Ray-Ban sunglasses, revealing a set of piercingly blue eyes entirely glazed over like a freshly baked Krispy Kreme doughnut.

He stood there a second, vacantly staring at me before he gave me a funny half-smirk. We ex-changed the compulsory two-kiss greeting and I asked him if he wanted to order anything.

“Oh,” he paused awkwardly, “yeah I guess so.” His tone was reluctant and slightly annoyed, as if I were forcing him into partaking in some kind of unnatural ritual.

We waited for two minutes back in line. He got to the counter, greeted the barista with a dis-missive tone. “Uh, ya, hi,” another pause as he scanned the Second Cup menu, “so like, if I just want a coffee, like, a normal coffee, do you know what I’m talking about?”

Visibly offended, the barista turned to the fil-ter coffee machine and poured him a cup. “That’s $2.50,” he said coldly. He paid entirely in quar-ters; slightly afraid that the barista at my caffeine haven would hate me by simple association, I of-fered him an apologetic smile and we walked back to where I had left my coat.

He removed his black leather jacket with a hugely misplaced sense of over-confidence. I could smell the pretension on him; it was even stronger than the smell of weed that emanated from his worn-out blazer and t-shirt combination.

I giggled awkwardly, as I always do in uncom-fortable situations. He took a gulp and let out the most satisfied groan I have ever heard anyone re-lease after tasting black coffee.

“Wow, this Colombian dark roast is absolute-ly,” taking another sip, “ah-mazing.” He added an unnecessary emphasis on the first syllable. I was already resenting his presence in my life.

Trying to make some kind of casual conversa-tion, I asked him teasingly if he was enjoying his coffee.

“It really is good. I had a long, exhausting, weird night, so I need this right now.”

More or less getting an idea of what kind of night he was referring to, I checked my phone to avoid having to ask a follow-up question. Notic-ing this, he did the same. As if receiving some important news, he jumped up, excused himself, and headed to the bathroom.

When he got back, he whipped out his phone. “So I’m in this modeling show. It’s not a big deal or anything but these are some of my headshots.”

They were like something out of a cheesy ‘90s amateur modeling catalogue. I resisted the urge to laugh in his face, and told him I thought the light-ing was really good.

“Honestly, I’ve met so many gorgeous female models, but they’re all so stupid. Literally every pretty girl I’ve ever met was basically an idiot.”

Sitting there across from him, I felt like in his mind I was either a hideous goblin or belonged to MENSA. This guy was not gaining any brownie points.

Like clockwork, he checked his phone five minutes later, sprang up out of his chair, and went to the bathroom again. This guy was really start-ing to weird me out. Not wanting to spend another minute with him, I faked receiving an important text. I used the most unoriginal excuse used by uninterested women everywhere: “I’m so sorry, but my sister has an emergency and she needs me.” The words were delivered with the convic-tion of a first-time stage actress, over dramatizing her lines with no convincing emotion.

“Shit, let me walk you home then.”Not wanting him to know where I lived, I told

him that it would not be necessary since she was not back at our place, but instead at her friend’s house in Hampstead. In retrospect, this was prob-ably not the best escape plan seeing as how he was headed in that same direction to get back home.

“Oh, what a lovely coincidence,” I said, crying a little bit on the inside.

We were nearing my metro stop when he said: “So I’m doing this photography project. With your eye colour and face shape, I think you would be perfect for it. It wouldn’t be published anywhere, just a personal project I’m working on.”

And that’s when I had reached my quota of creepy for this lifetime.

“Oh, uhm, wow. Here’s my stop. Sorry, I have to run, get home safely. BYE!” Before he could say anything, I sprinted onto the platform with the metro doors shutting behind me. The train pulled away, and I breathed in a deep, well-de-served sigh of relief.

À L’ÉTÉ 2014, PAS DE VACANCESPOUR LES PASSIONNÉS!Plus de 60 écoles d’été / 1 300 cours réguliers / 150 cours à distance ulaval.ca/ete

HR_ULaval_Concordian_10,5x3,6_NBc.pdf 1 2014-01-29 13:42

8 // tuEsdAy, MArCH 11, 2014

Culture // lIFE

Male friendships in the media: a golden age or bad bromance?

JACEy gIbb the other Press (douglas College)

NEW WESTMINSTER (CUP)—As whole-some as a bromance may sound, platonic male friendships are often bogged down by gender stereotypes and niche interests; the instances of true male companionship are as celebrated as they are scrutinized.

There has never been a shortage of close male friendships on television. In contrast, an Entertainment Weekly essay titled, “Where are all the female friendships on TV?” ex-plored the question of what happened to the golden age of girl-on-girl friendships à la shows like Sex and the City.

From the years of Friends’, Chandler and Joey being the roommate combo every guy aspired to, to present day BFF’s like Com-munity’s Troy and Abed. Even this article’s title comes from the definitive bromance an-

them “Guy Love,” a Scrubs ballad between two male best friends about, you guessed it, their inexplicable connection. There’s no shortage for inspiration on what a bromance should be, but that’s also one of the issues; for every accurate and honest representation of what real male friendships are, there’s a bromance that crosses the line as homopho-bic.

So how is it that a depiction of something as genuine as a bromance can be viewed as offensive? The discrimination is in the de-tails, as a lot of behaviour displayed in these friendships inevitably leads to queer jokes. Even the aforementioned “Guy Love” can’t steer clear of these skewed expectations sur-rounding two guys being close friends.

“It’s like I married my best friend,” Zach Braff leads, before Donald Faison follows up with, “But in a totally manly way.” At the implication of gay marriage from Braff’s character, there comes an added clarifica-tion.

New to the scrutiny of pop culture bro-mances? There’s actually a substantial amount of denunciation online; something I was completely unaware of when I first began researching bromances. Not everyone

is prepared to climb aboard the bromance love train and fully embrace the term as a celebration of male bonding. As harmless as the word may seem, some people interpret bromance as fostering homophobia.

In a 2013 Tumblr post by Queeradical, the author outlined five major criticisms against the term, saying bromances “are based on mocking and rejecting queerness,” “are used to queerbait,” “enforce white supremacy,” “enforce cis male dominance,” and ultimate-ly “are about asserting privilege.”

The post largely focuses on the atro-cious “Bound 2” parody starring Seth Rogen and James Franco and accuses television shows of using bromances as a way to rope in queer viewers who might expect to see these relationships evolve romantically — something that will apparently never hap-pen, since ostensibly “queerness is bad for capitalism.” Queeradical finishes their post with this knowledge nugget; “In conclusion, bromances are literally built on racism and homophobia by mocking othered identities for humour.”

It brings attention to the fact that some people out there are unhappy with the por-trayal of male friendships in the media. Of

It’s guy love, that’s all it is, he’s mine, I’m hiscourse there are going to be instances where people use the concept of a bromance to act out petty gay jokes and masquerade stereo-types as humorous behaviour. But for every I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry and I Love You, Man, there’s a Wayne’s World and Superbad to provide an example of what genuine male friendship is all about.

Let me dispel some misconceptions for you here, as a hopeless bromantic myself. A bromance isn’t a bunch of “no homo” jokes strung together in an attempt to ward off speculation from other people about your sexual orientations; it’s not a parody of what straight people suppose queer friendships are like. A bromance is simply a relationship where two guys are comfortable enough — with themselves and with each other — to wander outside the preconceived rubric of what male friendships are supposed to be. No longer founded on a triad of sports, girls, and beer, a bromance contains all of the ingredients that any other normal pair-ing would offer. In retrospect, it seems silly to even need a word specifically for a close bond between two males, but if that’s what it takes for some people to understand, then bromance on.

defined by SoCiAl bible urbAn diCTionAry AS, “The CompliCATed love And AffeCTion ShAred by Two STrAighT mAleS.” phoTo by fliCKr uSer run ATurner

what did you think of this paper?send us your letters to editor@theconcordian.com before Friday at 4 p.m. The Concordian reserves the right to edit your letters for length, clarity, taste and style.

letters are limited to 400 words.

9Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 //

artswrite to the editor: arts@theconcordian.com

literature // Arts

lemony snicket’s latest children’s graphic novel, The Dark, carries a universal message

NAtAsHA tAggArtonline editor

Each morning, Laszlo opens the basement door to greet the dark, in the hopes it will never visit him in his room at night.

“Hi,” Laszlo would say. “Hi, dark.” Until one night, the dark visits him — and

answers back.The chances are, you were afraid of the

dark as a child. The Dark is a graphic novel about a scared child who represents any one of us — a young boy named Laszlo who spends his days trying to avoid the dark.

As Laszlo walks around his big, empty house, equipped with a flashlight, he acknowl-edges the dark’s presence in the closet, behind the shower curtain and especially in the base-ment, where the dark lives.

“Hi, dark,” he says, peeking at the top of the stairs into darkness. Laszlo has never been inside the dark’s room at night, and he hopes the dark will never visit him in his. One night, however, when Laszlo’s night light burns out, the dark has the chance to visit him. Laszlo has to face the dark head on, and learns to over-come his fear with the help of an unlikely ally.

Leave it to Lemony Snicket, known for his A Series of Unfortunate Events, to come up with the most special way to tell a simple plot. The personification of the dark is creepy and unsettling, enough to make the reader feel ner-vous and intrigued, as if they themselves are

facing the dark in Laszlo’s shoes. Those familiar with Snicket’s writing style

will recognize his voice briefly throughout the book. However, readers expecting A Series of Unfortunate Events-type of written-magic, might end up slightly disappointed. Unlike Events, the text isn’t necessarily witty, it is more simple and direct, but nonetheless beautifully written. He uses poetry-like short sentences, which keep the mood suspenseful.

Jon Klassen’s illustrations evoke the feel-ings of mystery and fear. His minimalistic style, in terms of both colour and detail, comple-ment the tone of the book: dark, mysterious and foreboding. Sepia tones, mostly neutral colours and a lot of black are combined with

the contrast of light and shadow to create an abandoned-looking setting. Klassen frames little Laszlo in relation to dark shadow, often with his flashlight providing the only source of light — the reader is able to get a sense of be-ing succombed to darkness. The cover alone is enough to provoke a sense of dread.

The drawings that show the small Laszlo is his giant house allow the reader to see things from Laszlo’s perspective, and you can’t help but picture yourself as a child laying in bed, waiting anxiously for the morning light to ap-pear again. But, as often is the case, after the dark comes the light. As Laszlo learns to over-come his fear, the tones become lighter and less gloomy.

In 40 pages, the writer and illustrator duo is able to provoke countless emotions from being unnerved to cheery; you can feel yourself smil-ing by the end of it.

The Dark is marketed as a picture book for children aged 4-8, but the message of the book can stick with anyone and might resonate more with adults — the dark is simply a metaphor for many of the fears we have in life. The big-gest fear of all is the unknown. Snicket’s mes-sage: you can’t know good without knowing bad and you can’t enjoy the light without the dark.

The Dark, a Governor General’s Literary Award nominee, is available for sale at Chap-ters Indigo stores and online at amazon.ca

lemony SniCKeT (A SerieS of UnfortUnAte eventS) And Jon KlASSen (thiS iS not My hAt) TeAm TogeTher To CreATe the DArk.

Something terrible, in the basement dwells

visual arts// Arts

Bring me shelter, bring me warmth, bring me artthe stM’s Expo+ contest is letting the public vote on the art gracing bus shelters next winter

robIN stANFordContributor

Navigating Montreal’s public transportation system in winter comes with its own unique challenges, such as slippery sidewalks, relative bus scheduling, and crammed bus shelters.

In response to the last issue, the Societé de Transport de Montréal (STM) wants to make a change. With last year’s decision to implement new stylized bus shelters, the STM has initiated another move — art appreciation.

Quebecor Media, in collaboration with the STM, aims to bring about this change. The Expo+ contest, launched in January of this year, seeks to find 20 artistic works to adorn the newly designed bus shelters. According to the organizers, the art itself will serve to enhance the appreciation of these new installations.

In its first phase, the contest was open to all Quebec artists and marketing firms. During this time, over 1,100 artworks were put forth for consideration. The organizers themselves have little say in the end result and have turned the decision over to public voting.

The STm plAnS To ChAnge TrAnSiT ShelTerS inTo miniATure ArT gAllerieS, leAving iT To The publiC To deCide whiCh of monTreAl’S ArTiSTS will See Their ArT in The CiTy. voTing on The expo+ CompeTiTion SubmiSSionS ConTinueS un-Til mArCh 16.

The selection of the finalists is ongoing. Voting will be open to the public until March 16 through the contest webpage. It is possible to view all of the entries, divided into general public applications and those submitted by advertising groups. After voting is closed, the four most popular works will be awarded cash prizes totaling $10,000.

As there is no general theme to the con-test, the submissions themselves vary greatly. Among these are images of horses, Montreal cityscapes, Hollywood celebrities and abstract concepts, just to name a few.

This large diversity demonstrates what a wide range of artistic ventures Quebecers are engaged in. The variety points to the richness of Quebec’s artistic scene, where not all artists are looking at the same subjects in the same way. This divergence is found, not only in the public offerings but also in the corporate ones.

Surprisingly, none of the advertising compa-ny entries feel like promotional material or even focus on merchandise. One must wonder then if the category was made more on the basis of group contributions versus individual produc-tions, instead of the message to be transmitted. Regardless of this division, company-generated

art is just as diverse and interesting as the indi-vidual submissions.

Arguably, the diversity presented is slightly disappointing as well. It is unlikely that the fi-nalists will share any cohesive element in their material at all. An opportunity was missed to define the new bus shelters as a part of Mon-treal’s cultural environment. Had there been a defined theme, such as ‘chez nous’ for ex-ample, the final product would have had some focus and cultural resonance yet still retain the diversity already present.

It is a rare occurrence when the public is given a say concerning anything to do with col-lective transport. Given the opportunity now, everyone should vote — whether it be for their favourite artwork, or the for the one they would find the least objectionable to see every day on the morning commute.

Voting will continue until March 16. The top 20 finalists will be announced on March 24. The top four entries will be revealed on Friday, April 4 on the Salut Bonjour! televi-sion program and in Le Journal de Montreal and 24 Heures newspapers. For more infor-mation and to vote on the art submissions, visit: abribus.ca/en/contest/expo-plus/

10 // Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014

Film // Arts

winner at Cannes’ Critics week, The Lunchbox, connects two lonely people with a lot on their mind

ElIJAH buKrEEvstaff writer

You will hear the word ‘Bollywood’ applied to this movie, which is all sorts of wrong. No, there are no eye-rolling dances, no corny music and no eccentric twists and turns. The Lunch-box couldn’t have come from Bollywood and it couldn’t have come from Hollywood as it is today. Instead, it comes, like all great films do, from the heart. First-time writer-director Ritesh Batra has made a great Indian film.

This is a movie that looks like a romantic comedy, starts out like a piece of neo-realism and ends up being a real treasure — an insight-ful character study. You walk into it, and you expect it to raise questions like “What will she wear on their first date?” Would you believe it instead goes for “What do we live for?”

The main characters are two lonely souls in an overpopulated city. She is Ila (Nimrat

Kaur), a housewife dreaming of a better life, more space to breathe, a husband whose shirts wouldn’t reek of other women’s perfumes and a more rewarding relationship with her parents. He is Saajan (Irrfan Khan), a quiet, recently widowed accountant with only retire-ment to look forward to.

The two people are unconnected. But then, Ila sends lunch to her husband through the fa-mous Dabbawala service — this lunchbox and dozens more are carried through busy streets by bike, two trains, foot and a strolling cart. Finally, the lunchbox lands on Saajan’s desk, in a governmental building. He contemplates it with cold curiosity, opens the cans and pro-ceeds to eat the curry contained inside.

The lunchbox goes back empty. Ila is overjoyed: “He licked it clean!” Yes, someone licked the cans clean, but who? From the way her husband compliments her on an entirely different dish, Ila realizes her curry must have gone to the wrong address. Auntie, her upper floor neighbour who she communicates with

mainly by screaming out the window, is ada-mant: “The delivery man never made a mis-take before.”

Well, he has now, and Ila reacts to it in an unexpected manner: she goes with it. The next day, she sends the lunchbox with a small note. Saajan writes back, and a steady correspon-dence begins. They are both wise, intelligent and well-spoken. It is always wonderful when people like that find each other, against all odds. They have lived through things and have stories to share. Most of them are gripping. Ila and Saajan grow from contact with each other.

The strength of a film always depends on the strength of its actors, and the two leads de-liver. You’ve seen Irrfan Khan in such movies as The Amazing Spider-Man and Life of Pi. He’s a skilled actor, but possibly the last you’d imag-ine in a romantic film. Yet, he makes it work by showing a man hardened, but vulnerable. As for his co-star, it’s doubtful that you’ve seen Nimrat Kaur anywhere, or that you’ve heard her name before, but you just might hear it again.

She provides the film with its best dramatic ele-ments. The letters might have been written, but to us, the audience, they are read. Kaur shows a mastery of voice acting — now that’s talent. She’s also drop-dead gorgeous, which helps.

There are many laughs to be had, most of them involving Shaikh (Nawazuddin Siddiqui), an odd-mannered apprentice desperate for Saa-jan’s mentorship.

Otherwise, the film keeps a serious tone, and takes its time with the story. You may find it slow. You’ll be thankful for it, too — these are characters you want to spend time with. By corresponding, they seek the same thing as we do when we go to the movies — an escape from a seemingly inevitable routine. Their let-ters open a window into a different world.

Sometimes, another perspective is all you need, and this movie has perspective a-plen-ty.

The Lunchbox opens in theatres, with subtitles in English and French, on March 14.

Mumbai — Brief encounters of the curry kind

Cinema politica // Arts

A new Brooklyn, for a new generation, without the old oneKelly Anderson’s My Brooklyn gives us the history of New york’s famous district in the face of gentrification

FrédérIC t. MuCKlEstaff writer

Everyone has heard of or seen Brooklyn one way or the other. Some consider it the king-dom of Goodfellas’ infamous protagonist, or as the home of the enticing main character of Spike Lee’s first film, She’s Gotta Have It. Many remember the epic car chase of The French Con-nection as well. One thing is sure though, most of us won’t ever truly know this neighbourhood as closely as the people in this documentary.

My Brooklyn is a love testimony to one of the most culturally diverse neighbourhoods of North America. It also shows an infuriating display of what could be described as brutal gentrification. Kelly Anderson, a Canadian doc-umentary director and New York resident for many years, analyzes for us the contemporary metamorphosis that Brooklyn went through. She explains to us how and why iconic Brook-lyn became — notably because of urban-policy gurus (the Bloomberg administration and a few wealthy real estate developers) — another bour-geois-friendly downtown area.

More precisely, My Brooklyn focuses on the transformation of the previously effervescent shopping district and traditional meeting place for Brooklynites: Fulton Street Mall. Small busi-nesses that were an integral part of a strongly rooted community were ordered to desist and vacate the spot they occupied for 20 years. The proliferation of generic multinational shops

replaced the different and more personal busi-nesses that gave its personality to the area. All this for the purpose of “diversifying the range of users” of this shopping area. The possibility for affordable housing was tossed aside to give place to high luxury condos.

Sadly, these transformations made Brook-lyn an unfamiliar and harsh new environment. Those who gave Brooklyn its distinctive soul and heart could not live their day-to-day lives anymore.

In this documentary, Anderson shares with us the various reasons for her profound dedica-tion to what her family likes to call home. She also follows the money trail of this major reap-propriation of her neighbourhood by the pros-perous who left this area during a shameful past of segregation. The result is a thoughtful essay on a vibrant community trying to defend a place they cherish. It is an example of why change is not always for the best. It is also a study of se-rious economic and social problems portraying the clash of two groups belonging to different classes and races.

The plethora of characters that Anderson makes us meet gives us an outlook of their Brooklyn and the special connections that they have with this neighbourhood.

Anderson gives viewers a detailed but com-prehensible amount of information on their his-tory and allows us to understand not only why those people want to keep their Brooklyn like it’s always been, but also how this metamor-phosis is mostly the result of greediness.

Another interesting feature of the movie is

that it is transparent: the director is on the side of the oppressed. Nonetheless she admits that some of the changes might actually appeal to a part of her and that she was of the first wave of “gentrifiers” in Brooklyn.

Anderson also tries to show us that for some regular people, this neighbourhood needs to be modernized and gentrified — especially if the neighbourhood is expecting to attract another type of customer (by selling higher-end goods). However, sometimes you cannot help but feel awkward listening to those slightly or greatly snobbish interviewees and wonder if they ever went to this area in the first place or if they could ever understand what Brooklyn is really about. What we can be sure of though is that Ander-son clearly belongs in this neighbourhood. Her affection for the area transpires throughout the

whole movie and almost makes you want to move to this now-extraordinarily overpriced re-gion of New York City. In the end this movie will make you see all those condo projects in a dif-ferent light, like those that appeared around our own city in the last few years. Are those stan-dardized, unvarying, new buildings better than the old, slightly shady and kitschy commercial edifices from before? Thoughts like these are erected in the movie, and bring the issue surpris-ingly close to home. We can only hope, though, that gentrification advocates won’t sell the soul of our beloved Montreal.

My Brooklyn premieres in Quebec as part of Cinema Politica on Monday, March 17 at 7 p.m., where director Kelly Anderson will be present. For more information visit cinemapo-litica.org and catch the trailer at vimeo.

My Brooklyn ShowS viewerS The neighbourhood’S ChAngeS in The fACe of genTrifiCATion And Com-merCiAlizATion, while iTS reSidenTS fACe The ConSequenCeS.

AfTer A food delivery mix up, ilA (nimrAT KAur, PeDDlerS) And SAAJAn’S (irrfAn KhAn, life of Pi, the DArjeeling liMiteD) love STory unfoldS, AS Told To uS Through A SerieS of leTTerS. phoToS CourTeSy of Sony piCTureS ClASSiCS.

11Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 //

literature // Arts

the satire, Super Sad True Love Story, is an account of a mismatched couple in a dystopian world

toMEr sHAvItstaff writer

Lenny Abramov is a loser. He’s aging, he’s balding, and he’s meek. He is the polar opposite of all the young, attrac-tive, go-getting junior executives at his job and sometimes it seems like his very existence is an insult to a society that worships youth, vitality, and perfection above all. What makes it even more diffi-cult for Lenny to cope with his increasing age and receding hairline is the fact that he works for “Post-Human Services” in a department that specializes in “Infinite Life Extension,” effectively reversing the aging process and granting immortality to HNWI’s (High Net Worth Individu-als). While he gets older, his clients get younger.

This society, a dystopian not-too-far-in-the-future America, is the centre stage of Gary Shteyngart’s best-selling novel, Super Sad True Love Story.

As you might have guessed from the title, this is in fact a love story, and Len-ny’s life changes when he encounters the youthful beauty, Eunice Park. Lenny be-lieves that Eunice is the only thing that can fill the void in his life and after a

America’s futuristic portrait is super funny

brief awkward courting phase, Eunice agrees to give him a chance (mostly so she doesn’t have to move back in with her parents).

The story is told through excerpts of Lenny’s old fashioned — real paper! — journal and Eunice’s email correspon-dences on her “GlobalTeens” social net-work account. Social networks in this world are pushed to extremes, giving us some of the more hilarious and thought provoking moments in the book. By hold-ing your “apparati” (standard issue tab-let/iPhone hybrid) at people, you can see their credit score, their family history and their vital signs including real-time updates on their level of excitement and arousal.

The most popular application is RateMe Plus, where everyone grades each other on several metrics, the most important of them: “fuckability.” While Eunice can take pride in having an 800+ score on fuckability, Lenny’s abysmal score of 230 follows him around like an electronic scarlet letter, making him a source of mockery and revulsion wher-ever he goes.

Although the narrative centres on this unlikely love story, it is Shteyngart’s imaginative version of America that steals the show. Shteyngart presents us

with a decaying empire indebted to ex-ternal forces, a country whose collective vanity and misplaced pride blinds them from their inevitable and quickening de-mise. Everyone is obsessed with appear-ances, including the incompetent Ameri-can government run by the Bi-Partisan Party who are too busy scrambling, mak-ing sure everything looks pristine for the annual visit from their Chinese creditors, to see the multi-national wolves circling their prey.

What’s truly fascinating is how ee-rily familiar this dystopian vision is to the America we watch every day on the news. Super Sad True Love Story is a cau-tionary tale of a world we might find our-selves living in tomorrow if we remain superficial and indifferent.

That being said, the book is anything but bleak. Shteyngart has a unique writ-ing style and sense of humour that makes you laugh just as much as it makes you think. The characters of Lenny and Eu-nice are extremely fleshed-out and multi-faceted, and their lopsided love story is often times adorable, often times tragic, but always entertaining and relatable.

This book is recommended to those that are into dystopias, light-hearted sci-ence fiction, or just hilarious writing in general. Also, there have been reports

that reading Super Sad True Love Story in public may result in a modest increase to your fuckability rating.

Super Sad True Love Story is avail-able for sale at Chapters Indigo stores and online at amazon.ca

in A world where one’S ATTrACTiveneSS iS rAT-ed publiCly And wiTh A CliCK of A buTTon, The 39-yeAr-old And bAlding lenny doeSn’T give up on love.

Film // Arts

In Fear is a psychological horror film that takes a new couple on a ride of terror

olIvIA rANgEr-ENNsstaff writer

When pints turn to love and fear in the heart of Ireland

“If a man hurts an innocent person, the evil will fall back upon him and the fool will be destroyed.”

These are the lines scrawled on a bath-room wall in an Irish pub, where evil will de-finitively unleash in Jeremy Lovering’s new psychological thriller, In Fear.

Lucy sits on the toilet, reading the lines, she smirks and pens the words on the wall: “Or not.” This turns out to be a bad decision,

as the audience soon finds out.In Fear is a complex thriller bursting at

the seams with mind games. The plot is simple: Lucy (Alice Englert) and Tom (Iain de Caestecker) are going to a festival in Ire-land, when they stop off at a pub on the way. When Lucy returns from the washroom, Tom tells her about a slight mishap with the mates at the pub. A man accidentally spilled Tom’s drink, so Tom bought him another one. “I am a lover, not a fighter,” Tom says in his rich Irish brogue as he shrugs.

Things look innocent enough until Tom wryly suggests they find a hotel for the night instead of going on to the festival. He wants a

romantic night with Lucy and he’s found just the place, a “slice of heaven,” a hotel tucked deep into the woods. The tone is set.

As the couple drive on and on, trying to find the hotel, tension rises. When they kiss, the lovers don’t even notice that the GPS loses its signal. The cell phones keep glitching and the hotel is impossible to find. The pair drive on and on, through a narrowing lane in a for-est, until they find conflicting signs concern-ing the hotel’s location. Does it even exist? As Lucy says when she focuses on the map, “We’re not lost, we’re in a fucking maze.”

The scenery and camera-work do wonders in this film. With vast, flat landscapes and

gray pastures, the Irish background makes you want to flee for your life. You feel surrounded by emptiness and desolation. Trees come alive at night time as Lucy begins to repeatedly see a masked man in the form of dancing branches. Tom assures her that she is hallucinating, but as the night progresses, things just get weirder and weirder. The camera zooms in at precise moments to linger on Lucy’s terrified face, on a gate closing, or on tires speeding up. The anticipation just keeps on building, and the viewer is pretty much ready to scream with Lucy when she feels someone (or something) is pulling at her hair.

The best part of the film lies in the psycho-logical mind games. We learn that confidence and new love can quickly turn sour when in a bad situation. Tom and Lucy turn against each other at times, only to unite when faced with a string of dead rats, for example. Who can be trusted, and why? The innocent spilled drink at the pub becomes a burning hot issue. Are the pub mates out there? The viewer is tor-mented and teased until the very last minute of the film, forced to ponder the nature of hu-manity and the horror of the survival instinct.

The cast does a fine job of displaying gen-uine terror. Lovering needed a cast ready to take whatever would come since he insisted on having no script. Every actor had to sign up without knowing what would happen.

Viewers who like immediate action should probably shy away from this thriller, though. It takes a good 40 or so minutes before anything actually happens. The beauty in this produc-tion lies in the building up of tension and fear, not in any gory scenes. That said, since most of the action happens in a car in one single night, Lovering excels at moving the action along and keeping the facts at bay. You want to find out who is out there, at any cost.

You can catch In Fear starting on March 13 at Montreal’s Cineplex Odeon.

in feAr CreATeS An ever-growing ATmoSphere of feAr, Turning new love inTo biTTer hATred in The fACe of AdverSiTy. phoTo iS A STill from you-Tube.

12 // Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014

musicwrite to the editor: music@theconcordian.com

Q&A // MusIC

Nick thorburn discusses their latest album’s ‘louder,’ and more ‘aggressive’ sound

JEssICA roMErAMusic editor

Formed in Montreal nearly a decade ago, indie-pop collective Islands released their fifth record Ski Mask back in Sep-

tember. The album showcases the band’s abil-ity to juxtapose upbeat melodies with darker, more intuitive lyrics. Since the release of Ski Mask, the band has been extensively touring and will be stopping in Montreal on March 13 at La Sala Rossa with guests Escondido. We spoke to Islands frontman Nick Thorburn to discuss the band’s origins, musical inspira-tions and their latest record.

The Concordian: What prompted you guys to take up music? How did you all meet?

Nick Thorburn: Firstly, I can’t speak for the others. Evan and Geordie have a folk musician father and they grew up playing with him. I don’t think that there was any one prompt for any one of us to play. Music has always been near the creative center of my life. First it was in a passive sense, and as a teenager it took on a more active role. Evan and Geordie play[ed] in the Magic. I was a fan of their band and asked them to play with Islands.

C: How would you describe your sound? How would you describe the overall tone

and feel of Ski Mask?N: I am loathe to describe “my sound” as

it seems like a bit of a red herring. I would let the music speak for itself, which in this case is of a more aggressive and confrontational nature than previous Islands record. It’s tuff [sic].

C: What/who inspired your latest al-bum?

N: Me...and other stupid people in my life.

C: Is there a song that speaks to you

Islands explore darker territory on Ski Mask

most from the album?N: I wrote them so they all “speak to

me” as it were. But for the sake of the con-versation, I’ll say “Death Drive.”

C: How do you think that being from Montreal has influenced your sound?

N: Musically speaking, I cut my teeth in Montreal. I’m from Vancouver Island though. Islands, though, it was conceived and birthed in Los Angeles, was raised in Mon-treal. I guess we had peers in Montreal during

that time (around 2005) but it was mostly an insulated affair.

C: What is tour life like for the band?N: Arrested development. Adolescent, he-

donistic, and self-indulgent. If you’re not care-ful, it can turn you into a real asshole.

C: What do you do when you are not busy performing, touring and recording?

N: I’m writing! C: How does this album compare to

your previous releases?N: It’s louder, violent and more aggres-

sive. But still within pop music confines. C: What are you listening to mostly

nowadays?N: Our drummer Adam has a great proj-

ect called American Tomahawk. This Ni-gerian weirdo from the ‘70s called William Onyeabor. Arthur Russell. Curtis Mayfield. Margo Guryan. Kate & Anna McGarrigle.

C: What would you like listeners to think/feel when they hear your music?

N: Sadness and regret. C: Is there a message you are trying to

convey through your music?N: You don’t exist. You’re a hologram.

Don’t bother. C: Is there a particular memory that

stands out from your musical career thus far?

N: It’s all been stamped out with drugs and alcohol.

opinion // MusIC

A letter to the disappearing art of buyings CDswhy we should continue to buy music instead of just downloading it

MArCo sAvErIANoAssistant opinions editor

I remember the excitement I felt when I start-ed buying my own CDs. I would beg my par-ents for money, and when they finally gave in, I’d beg them to drive me to the mall after school to buy the latest release from whatev-er artist I was obsessing over at the time. I’d immediately go home, tear open the plastic, and flip through the album artwork, admir-ing each glossy page.

I may no longer save up my allowance or beg my parents for money to buy a CD, but the excitement is still there. In the age of digital downloads and torrents, people ex-pressing their love for compact discs is rare. They’re becoming less and less prominent, and that makes me sad. I’m that person who counts down to an album release and goes to HMV to buy it the day it comes out. I always have been and I always will be.

I’m not saying that I don’t download music digitally, because I’d be lying if I said I didn’t. Most of the music I have on my

computer was downloaded. Some albums though, deserve to be purchased, and even though you can buy an album within sec-onds from the comfort of your own home on iTunes, I can’t stand the idea of not having a CD to hold in my hands.

When I was a kid, I didn’t have a com-puter in my room, I didn’t have a laptop, and I didn’t have a cell phone. I had my CDs, and I would put on my headphones and listen to

some of them for hours on end, replaying my favourite songs until I knew them by heart.

Each CD I have brings back a memory — some good, and some bad. Britney Spears’ In The Zone, for example, reminds me of when I was dragged to my older sister’s soc-cer games as a kid. I would bring my por-table CD player (remember Discmans?), find a nice shady spot, and listen to Britney. The countless scratches on the case prove that

Ski MaSk exploreS A louder, more ConfronTATionAl Sound ThAn whAT CAn be heArd on Their previouS releASeS. phoTo by JuSTin Kuo

it’s been through a lot, and I love that. I even remember when I was around nine-years-old, and my sister wanted to borrow my Christina Aguilera CD. I reluctantly let her. When she returned it with a cracked case, I went ballistic.

Maybe I’m just being overly-sentimental, but I love being able to look through my collection and reminisce. Some of my older purchases are a bit questionable, but I still have a story for every CD I own. Whether it’s when I got it, who bought it for me, or how I related to the music at the time, I’ll never forget how it came to be mine. That’s what makes them special. You don’t get that feel-ing when you digitally download an album.

In the fast-paced modern world we live in, we’re constantly finding ways to make our lives more compact and efficient. Over the decades, we’ve moved from records to cassettes to compact discs, and now digital downloads. It may be more convenient to download an album on your laptop rather than going to the store to buy it, but if you’re as sappy as I am, you know that it’s not quite the same thing.

I’ll keep buying CDs for as long as they’re still producing them. I don’t care if I’m run-ning out of storage space, or that my fam-ily and friends think I’m weird for actually paying for my music. They’ll always have a special place in my heart. Photo by Keith Race

Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 // 13

Quick spins // MusIC

-Paul Traunero -Jessica Romera

Trust - Joyland (Arts & Crafts; 2014)

Pharrell Williams has truly outdone himself in his latest album, G I R L. It’s an adventurous summer-lovin’ album with an interesting set of guest appearances from artists across the music industry’s spectrum. This 10-song mixture has interesting collaborations with Justin Timberlake, Miley Cyrus, Kelly Osbourne, Daft Punk, Alicia Keys, and Timbaland, to name a few. The best way to describe such an album is that it really tries to make you feel happy. It also has an emotional jazzy side to add a final touch. Already, the latest single off the album, “Happy,” has garnished 100 million views on YouTube alone. If you are look-ing for a summer time set list of tunes to jam to either in the car or in the club, G I R L is definitely an album for you. Finally, someone in the indus-try is making real music again, and still hitting the mainstream airwaves with a bang.

Trial Track: “Gust of Wind”

-Jonathan Cohen

Pharrell - G I R L (Columbia; 2014)

Quick Spins

Real Estate - Atlas (Domino; 2014)

7/108/108/10

For their third studio album, the New Jersey indie rockers step out from behind the haze of their previous releases and confirm that they are more than just a novelty act. With their two previous albums, Real Estate has proven that simplicity is the key to their popularity. Their dreamy arrangements and pop melodies feel pleasant and nostalgic, and never required much investment from the listener. With At-las, we are faced with a maturation. The lyrics speak of time, regret, and alienation and the production is more polished, creating a deeper and more complex listen.

The band may be growing up, but the core of what makes Real Estate feel so genuine re-mains intact: a bunch of suburban guys who want to have fun and play music. Who can complain with that?

Trial Track: “Talking Backwards”

Trust unleashes a more mature and complex sound on his sophomore effort, Joyland. Origi-nally a two-piece effort, Trust is now composed uniquely of Toronto-based artist Robert Alfons. Following up his Juno-nominated debut album TRST, Alfons attempts to find a balance between upbeat, synthy house music and darker techno, and does so with relative ease. Most of Joyland has a lighter, dreamy feel to it: album opener “Slightly Floating” perpetuates a feeling of be-ing caught up in a synth-fuelled dream. The al-bum then moves into murkier soundscapes on tracks like “Are We Arc?” and “Four Gut,” all the while maintaining a retro-inspired dance-ability. At times, the album borders on overly eurobeat techno, but tracks like “Barely” remind us that Alfons is able to create an atmosphere that is both intricate and fun.

Trial Track: “Barely”

>> Sparks fly as Coldplay announces new album

Coldplay announced the release of their sixth studio album, Ghost Stories, set to come out May 19, reports Time. The British rock band also released two audio tracks from the al-bum, “Midnight” and “Magic,” so fans can get a listen before the long-awaited date. “Magic” takes us back to the familiar sound of Coldplay’s earlier days, already making its way up the U.K. charts at number two.

>> Sink your teeth into Linkin Park and 30 Sec-onds to Mars’ upcoming Carnivores TourLinkin Park and 30 Seconds to Mars join rock forces as they team up for their upcoming Carnivores Tour kicking off Aug. 8 said Bill-board. With special guest AFI, the rockers will be making noise in Tampa, Montreal, Denver and other North American cities, ending their tour in California Sept. 19. Tour-ing together for the first time, fans will get a chance to check them out Aug. 23 at Parc Jean Drapeau.

>> Julian Casablancas goes solo…again!

Following the success of Julian Casablancas’ first solo album Phrazes for the Young, Casa-blancas has announced that a second solo album is in the works reports Rolling Stone. Playing alongside the Voidz as his backup band, a preview of the album can be heard on YouTube. The album title and release date have yet to be announced, however some tour dates have been made public with Casa-blancas hitting the road later this month, with gigs at Lollapalooza in Chile, and Gov-ernor’s Ball in New York City.

>> Andre 3000 plays Jimi Hendrix in anticipated biopic Jimi: All Is By My Side

When Outkast is not busy headlining a mil-lion festivals this year, frontman Andre 3000 can be seen playing Jimi Hendrix in the awaited biopic Jimi: All Is By My Side. Set to premiere at Austin’s South by Southwest Mu-sic Festival on March 12, director John Rid-ley started this project seven years ago, said Rolling Stone. Ridley was highly inspired by Hendrix’s “Sending My Love to Linda” and wanted to know more about the girl in the title, and found out how much she inspired Hendrix. An exclusive clip of the biopic can be found on rollingstone.com, specifically a scene between Hendrix and the famous Linda Keith. Hendrix’s estate, however, is hesitant on the idea, making it so the fea-ture won’t be including any of the guitarist’s original songs. Still, Andre will be seen cov-ering Muddy Waters, The Beatles and other influential artists.

ANgElA dE CICCoAssistant life editor

Compiled by Jessica RomeraMusic editor

Top 10 TV show intros

10. “How Soon is Now?” by Love Spit Love - CharmedNineties television in a nutshell: girl power, leather pants, witchcraft and a theme song from an epically forgotten one-hit wonder band, Charmed has got it all. I don’t think anyone actually hears this and thinks, “Wow, what a great song by Love Spit Love.” No, they think Charmed. And rightfully so.

9. “Greenback Boogie” by Ima Robot - SuitsSlick, suave and infectiously fun: words that can describe the Suits theme song and the show’s main man himself, Mr. Harvey Spec-ter. “Greenback Boogie,” though light and fun, ultimately gets repetitive if you listen to

the entire five minutes of it. Unfortunately, the same goes for the series: it can start to lose its charm and can become kind of mo-notonous. Sorry Suits fans.

8. “Dexter Main Title” by Rolfe Kent - DexterLike Dexter Morgan, the theme song to Showtime’s serial killer drama is cool, calm and creepy. It’s almost two full minutes of in-strumentals played over sequences of Dexter getting ready in the morning. Set in Florida, the music is laced with playful Cuban and Latin influences, which offers a nice juxtapo-sition to the show’s dark content.

7. “Who Are You?,” “Won’t Get Fooled Again,” “Baba O’Riley” by The Who - CSI:Crime Scene Investigation, CSI:Miami, CSI: New York The Who have become synonymous with the CSI franchise. With all three shows using an iconic song from the British rock ’n’ roll vets, you suffer through David Caruso’s acting and cheesy one-liners just so you can chant alongside Roger Daltrey.

6. “Superhero” by Jane’s Addiction - Entou-rageLust, partying and just pure hedonistic plea-sure: Entourage and its theme song are all about having a good time, and you get this impression from the very opening chords of “Superhero.” Regardless of how many times you’ve heard this song, you know you won’t fast forward through the opening credits of the Entourage boys rolling through Los Ange-les in a 1965 black Lincoln Continental, it’s just that catchy.

5. “This Life” by Curtis Stigers & The Forest Rangers - Sons Of Anarchy

Much like the show itself, the Sons of Anar-chy theme song starts off relatively low-key, then builds up into a cataclysm of emotional intensity. “This Life” is gritty southern guitar work at its best and does a stellar job at con-veying the outlaw mentality of ‘us against them’ that is at the core of the series.

4. “Woke Up This Morning” by Alabama 3 - The SopranosEverything about this TV intro is cool. Tony Soprano makes riding through New Jersey seem a lot more exciting than it really prob-ably is thanks to Alabama 3’s hazy, cigar-fueled song about violence and life on the fringes.

3. “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” by Dj Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince - The Fresh Prince of Bel-AirBefore Will Smith was credited with being a serious actor for his work in Academy Award nominated films (let’s pretend Wild Wild West never happened), Will Smith was the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. The theme song for this ‘90s gem is iconic despite its cheesiness and definitely deserves a spot on this list.

2. “California” by Phantom Planet - The O.C.An instant classic and one-hit wonder, no member of generation Y can resist the siren call of The O.C.’s theme song. It’s sunny, it’s catchy and fills us with some good old fash-ion nostalgia.

1. “I’ll Be There For You” by The Rembrandts - FriendsAre you surprised? This gets the number one spot for obvious reasons. 1. We all know the words. 2. It makes us happy. 3. *clap clap clap clap*

// Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 14

CHrIs CordEllAstaff writer

Sports in the News

>> haBs land Big fish on deadline daY

>> trouBle in vancouver

Montreal hasn’t been known to make huge deals at the trade deadline but this year was an exception. The Canadiens have consis-tently been criticized for not having enough big guys on forward who could score, but they may have solved that with the acquisi-tion of New York Islanders forward Thomas Vanek and a conditional fifth round pick in exchange for Habs prospect Sebastian Col-lberg and a second round pick in this year’s draft, as first reported by TSN. Vanek has been in the league since being drafted by the Buffalo Sabres in 2005 and has been a model of consistency, scoring at least 20 goals ev-ery season. This is Vanek’s third team of the year after being traded from Buffalo to New York earlier in the year. The Islanders offered Vanek a seven year, $50 million extension, which he rejected, TSN also reported. This put Islander general manager Garth Snow in a vulnerable position and forced his hand to trade Vanek and get something in return. Vanek will be wearing number 20 for the Habs, which was last taken in 2013 by Colby Armstrong.

The Roberto Luongo era in Vancouver has finally come to an end. The Canucks traded Luongo and prospect Steven Anthony to the Florida Panthers in exchange for goaltender Jakob Markstrom and forward Shawn Mat-thias, according to TSN. This is the second consecutive year that Vancouver has traded a starting goalie away after trading Cory Sch-neider at last year’s draft to the New Jersey Devils. After publicly trying to trade Roberto last year but unwilling to pay a part of the contract to do it, Vancouver decided to trade Schneider. It was assumed Luongo in turn would continue to be the number one guy this year. However, things turned ugly when backup goaltender Eddie Lack was given the start against the Ottawa Senators in the big Heritage Classic game earlier in the month in Vancouver. Luongo’s NHL career has seemingly come full circle, as he returns to where his career started.

>> carleton ravens cis chaMPions

This past weekend in Ottawa, the Carleton Ravens beat the Ottawa Gee-Gees in the Men’s university basketball championships 79-67. It is their fourth straight champion-ship and 10th win overall in the past 12 years.In the bronze medal game, the Alberta Gold-en Bears beat the Victoria Vikes 61-53. The only Quebec team in the CIS top eight was McGill and they lost both of their games to Saskatchewan and Victoria.

Profile // sPorts

Remembering his time at Concordiathe long-time stingers sniper says adieu to the university’s program

ANdrEw MAggIostaff writer

sportswrite to the editor: sports@theconcordian.com

They say all good things come to an end. They never say how they might end, though.

With the Stingers down 8-4 in the third pe-riod of game two in their Ontario University Athletics (OUA) conference first-round playoff series against the McGill Redmen, time was running out on George Lovatsis’ Canadian In-teruniversity Sport (CIS) men’s hockey career.

The Stingers had lost game one and a loss in this game would eliminate them from play-off contention, much earlier than any of the Stingers would have ever hoped, especially Lovatsis.

The fifth-year captain did everything he could that night to drag his team back into the game; but the deficit was too great, the Red-men’s lead was insurmountable.

The normally mild-mannered Lovatsis had two outbursts of emotion in the final game.

The first was a moment of blind rage. Lo-vatsis gave a solid hack to the back of a Red-men’s player’s leg. Lovatsis then slammed the penalty box door behind him as he was sent off for slashing.

Lovatsis was watching his career end in the last possible way he could have ever imag-ined, but he made sure to make his presence felt one last time.

The second was the outpouring of heartfelt tears into the shoulder of his head coach, Kev-in Figsby. They stood alone on the ice near the Stingers bench in a long embrace, exchanging a few words as the moment overcame them.

“I’ve been here for five years. This is what my life has been the last five years. This is pretty much the end of the era of me being here,” said the Markham, Ont. native. “I was thinking about all the things I’ve experienced here, all the good things and the bad things. I’ve learned so much over the past five years from being here.”

“He [Figsby] just said that he was proud of me, that it was a good five years together. That was pretty much it. It was more just emo-tional, just tears flowing more than anything else,” said Lovatsis.

“George has been a pleasure to coach over the past five years. He’s matured as a player and as a young man,” said Figsby. “We don’t usually have players with us who stay for the entire five years, since a lot of them are [major junior] players who’ve already been going to school before coming here. We’re lucky when we have a guy for three, four years, so to have a guy come in as early as George did from when he got here to him graduating now, it’s been a real treat to watch.”

After half a decade of early morning prac-tises, late-night road trips and countless glo-rious on-ice moments, you’d think Lovatsis would have a few special stories to share. In-stead of specific moments, what he’ll fondly reminisce about the most were the people he spent those five years with.

“I think it’s all the teammates I’ve had over

the years,” said Lovatsis. “Every single one of them have been a great teammate. I’ve never had a problem with anyone. I think that’s one important thing to take from the past five years, just the relationships I’ve made over the time I was here with my teammates. That’s the thing that stands out the most.”

Lovatsis was rewarded for his strong play and leadership qualities over his first four years by being named captain by Figsby be-fore this season. Figsby could have put it to a players vote, but he knew that either way, Lo-vatsis would be the one wearing the ‘C’ over his heart.

“You get the opportunity to watch the guys grow and mature,” said Figsby. “George came in and he was a quiet, unassuming, pretty shy kid. To be honest he hasn’t changed all that much except I’ve seen his maturity and leadership capabilities have grown, and that’s precisely why when we we’re looking at mak-ing a leadership group going into this season I decided to name George the team captain. Just watching him play, watching his leader-ship on the ice, off the ice, we knew it was a good opportunity for us as a young team to have a mature young man like George as our leader this year.”

“It was an honour to be named captain,” said Lovatsis. “Coming in I knew we were go-ing to have a young team and I knew it was going to be my job to guide them along in the right direction this year, just by teaching them from my experiences. It was a good learning experience for me too, and I hope they learned from me.”

Reflecting on his career, Lovatsis saw the

most of his personal growth happen off the ice. He had to learn to fend for himself while being away from home, on top of having to balance the hectic student-athlete lifestyle.

Now that his time at Concordia is drawing to a close, he’s ready to look ahead. A fork in the road awaits him; continue his hockey ca-reer or join the workforce right out of school? With the potential of going pro with a couple of teams in France, Lovatsis has some big deci-sions to make.

“If there are opportunities there, it’s defi-nitely something I’d like to pursue,” he said. “There might be some opportunities in France to go pro. If something comes up and it’s worth it for me then I’ll definitely consider it. For now there’s nothing set in stone and even-tually I’ll have to start looking ahead to getting a job and start making money, stuff like that. So it really depends on if it’s worth it and if it’s a good experience and whatnot.”

“If not, the plan is to apply to teacher’s col-lege in Ontario and hopefully within the next three years become a teacher,” said Lovatsis.

When people look back on Lovatsis’ ca-reer, they’ll remember the smooth skating stride and the lighting-quick release that led to 56 career CIS goals, including playoffs.

Lovatsis, though, wants to be remembered for his role as an individual off the ice as op-posed to his role as a sniper on it.

“I hope I’m remembered as a good person, as a good teammate, and as a good friend, as being there at the right time for my teammates and friends. I don’t know, I think I’m a good person, so I hope people will remember me for that.”

lovATSiS’ legACy: The CApTAin leAveS ConCordiA AfTer five SeASonS. phoTo by briAnnA ThiCKe

15Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 //

report card // sPorts

opinion // sPorts

Many positives this season for Stingers hockey

Concordians optimistic about baseball’s future in MTL

the Concordian looks at what the men and women’s teams need to do to improve next season

the Mlb is set to return to the olympic stadium on March 28 and 29

ANdrEw dAvIsstaff writer

MAttHEw sHANAHANstaff writer

September 29, 2004: The Montreal Expos host the Florida Marlins at the Olympic Stadium in front of 31,395 fans in what would be their last game in front of the Montreal faithful. That very same day, Major League Baseball (MLB) announced it would be relocating the Expos franchise to Wash-ington, D.C. at the end of that season. With an NHL lockout on the rise, it would prove to be a tough time for Montreal sports fans. For the first six years that the Expos were no more, baseball seemed to be slowly disappearing in Montreal.

But things have turned around for the better for Montreal baseball. Minor things such as the induction of former Expo Andre Dawson into the Baseball Hall of Fame, the death of Gary Carter, and the creation of the Montreal Baseball Project are only some of the things that have given Mon-treal baseball fans a renewed sense of hope.

“Just the excitement that’s already risen is positive reinforcement to the thought of having baseball come back to Montreal,” said Stingers’ baseball player, Matthew Adams-Whitaker. “See-ing how the media is all over it, and there are

already speculations about getting a team back here, I think our chances are increasing!”

Last summer, Montrealers headed to Toronto in July to watch a Blue Jays game to show major league baseball that Montrealers are a passion-ate fan base. Over 1,000 Expos fans appeared in left field on that sunny Saturday afternoon. But the biggest step forward yet is that the Toronto Blue Jays will host the New York Mets in a two-game exhibition series at the Olympic Stadium on March 28 and 29 of this year.

“It’ll definitely help gain attention, especially if the fans fill up the Olympic Stadium,” said Con-cordia student Adrien Travers. “But at the end of the day it’s [going to] depend on whether the dol-lars fit and if the MLB is open to the idea or not.”

“The Jays-Mets series will reveal how com-mitted Montreal is to baseball,” said Concordia student Giordano Cescutti. “I believe the fans took the team for granted prior to them leaving. If they happen to return, fans will never let them leave.”

Returning franchises are nothing new to the MLB. We’ve seen it become a success in cities such as Seattle and Washington.

However not all Concordians share the same level of excitement: “It’s a good start but a lot more research and development would need to be done,” Daniele Iannarone said. “I don’t think it can be used as a measuring stick to determine whether baseball belongs here or not.”

It’s known around Montreal’s baseball com-munity that there is one common denominator

Men’s hockey team

The men’s hockey season was filled with ob-stacles to overcome. The team was hit very hard with injuries, the most notable being their first-line winger Jessyco Bernard and alternate captain Youssef Kabbaj. Although teams never like to use injuries as an excuse, it made success much hard-er to come by for the Stingers. The defensive core was severely victimized by injuries, with only one defenceman playing in all 28 games.

The Stingers had a very young team this year, with 13 first-year players on the roster. After mak-ing it to the post-season for the first time in three years, the team’s lack of experience may help ex-plain an early exit from the playoffs against the heavily favoured McGill Redmen. A team with so many new players will also have a difficult time creating chemistry, something that will develop as the players continue to play together in the coming years.

The team came close to defeating the Redmen in the first game of their playoff se-ries, but a few breakdowns in a matter of minutes cost them dearly. The Stingers kept the second game close until the midway point of the game, when the Red-men’s offensive skill took over the game and buried the Stingers. The difference in both skill and experience was clear between the two teams.

The team also said fare-well to their beloved captain, George Lovatsis, who reached

his maximum five-year eligibility. The veteran winger was an undeniable leader of the team, and his departure will be noticed. With such a young team, leadership is a valued commodity. Lovatsis brought an incredible amount of leader-ship with him wherever he went.

Although the season was a challenging one, there were still many positives that can be taken out of it. Star forward Olivier Hinse was a con-sistent bright spot throughout the season, finish-ing third in the Canadian Interuniversity Sports league (CIS) with 18 goals. Hinse also led the team with 34 points, while also bringing leader-ship and energy each and every game. Starting goalie Antonio Mastropietro was a workhorse for the team, playing in 20 of the team’s 28 games. On most nights, Mastropietro gave the Stingers a chance to win.

Moving forward, the team will only get better as the younger players gain experience. Although losing Lovatsis and his leadership is a difficult pill to swallow, the team will continue to thrive under the leadership of Hinse, Kabbaj, Bernard and Kyle Armstrong. The Stingers have a very hopeful fu-ture ahead of them, and the Stingers will become more experienced and competitive as a group.

Women’s hockey team

The women’s hockey team finished with their best record in four years, but it was still a difficult season. Finishing the season with a 5-15 record, the Stingers struggled to produce offensively. Although the team played better than their record gives them credit for — seven of their losses were by one-goal margins — a lack of execution and consistency hurt their chances to succeed in the postseason.

In their playoff series with the McGill Martlets, the Stingers lost by a score of 3-2 in a very close game one. Although the team

played well in that game, they were thrashed in the second by a score of 10-2, ending their season in a disappointing fashion. Inconsis-tencies cost the team in the end.

The 10-2 loss was also the last game for four of the veteran Stingers, most notably their captain Erin Lally. Although this leaves the team with a huge loss of both experi-ence and leadership, it is an opportunity for younger Stingers to step up and become leaders. The team can definitely build off a frustrating season. They know their final record is not a fair reflection of how they played, and they will be looking to better that next year.

The ConCordiA STingerS reTurned To The plAyoffS ThiS SeASon, buT boTh TeAmS fell To mCgill in Two STrAighT gAmeS. phoToS by briAnnA ThiCKe

that needs to be estab-lished if this city is ever going to get a new fran-chise.

“With a new stadium and with better loca-tion we have a recipe for success,” said Stingers’ pitcher, Alex Kechayan.

“If we can fill up the Big O watching two ran-dom teams, then we can surely fill a brand new stadium watching our Expos,” said Justin Ferrara, also a Concor-dia student.

Warren Cromartie, the founder of Montre-al Baseball Project and former Montreal Expos outfielder has already tweeted that over 100,000 tickets have been sold. However it is not all sold out just yet. If you want to take part in bringing base-ball back Montreal, get your tickets now. Small quantities of tickets are still avail-able at evenko.ca.

16 // Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014

opinionswrite to the editor: opinions@theconcordian.com

Editorial // oPINoNs

Can I sit on your lap? Standing is a problem on shuttleIt’s not laziness, standing on the shuttle bus is painful

If you’ve ever ridden the shuttle bus then you know that it can get pretty crowded and if you’ve ever been unlucky enough to have to stand throughout the 25 minute ride, you know how terrible it can be.

Unlike riding with the STM, the Concor-dia shuttle bus doesn’t make any stops. Be-cause it doesn’t make any stops there is no opportunities for people to get off and for seats to open up. As a result anyone board-ing the shuttle when all the seats are full must stand.

This isn’t so bad when there’s only a few other people standing, but it’s murder when the bus is full.Chances are you’ll be

social // oPINIoNs

Millennials are drunk on Facebook likesthe power of social media rears its ugly head with the latest craze called NekNominations

ANtoNI NErEstANtContributor

For those of you who have been lucky enough to have been shield-ed from such ignorance, the recent NekNomination craze is a disturb-

ing practice which calls for people to chug large quantities of alcohol and then nomi-nate others to replicate the senseless ritual. I have seen my fair share of foolish viral videos, but these ones take the cake — by a landslide.

While watching some of these videos, I simply shook my head in disbelief.

I began to search for the appropriate

words to describe the continuously growing phenomenon we call social media. With it, I have noticed a troubling contradiction: em-powerment and destruction.

One undoubtedly feels a jolt of confi-dence knowing that without any specific expertise, hundreds, thousands or even millions of online audience members can endorse their thoughts and actions by shar-ing or “liking” them on social media. Yet, in such a wide network where content is infinite, we are endlessly bombarded with entertainment options that make the fight against our low attention spans even more challenging.

For many, standing out is not only a top priority, it’s the only priority. And as we somehow grew accustomed to the ini-

tial wave of NekNomination videos, the ex-treme lengths to which NekNominees go to get their 15 minutes of social media fame reveal just how destructive these platforms can be.

When a person, seemingly without giv-ing it a second thought, is willing to include urine in their alcoholic beverages or to fol-low their guzzling exploits by diving into a river in order to “stand out,” it begs the question, how far will some go to reach a pointless objective?

Sadly, there have been at least five deaths around the world that have been linked to this farcical game. Jonny Byrne, a 19-year-old from Carlow, Ireland, died last month after drinking a pint and jumping into the river.

An optimistic take on these senseless tragedies is that they will hopefully raise awareness about the hazards of NekNomi-nation stunts, and ultimately help scale back the negligence that is evidenced in on-line behaviour. Unfortunately, I am not one of those optimists.

Social media replicates and consider-ably enhances the pressurized environment found in high schools and colleges.

“We found in our study that people, college students, are not getting a sense of social support from being on the phone,” UCLA developmental psychologist Patri-cia Greenfield told CBC News, Feb. 24. “They’re getting social support through big-ger networks and having a sense that their audience is large.”

Social media metrics through which we express approval such as retweets, likes and views dominate the thoughts of those who are on a quest for social acceptance. Along with other attention-desperate stunts caught on camera, NekNomination videos excel in all of these categories. These larger networks breed more peer pressure, which in turn leads to more careless behaviour. They become indisputable social proof that outlandish acts can be someone’s ticket to Internet superstardom.

In fairness, these platforms enable us to connect with others beyond all boundaries as well as exchange information and ideas. Unquestionably, the content shared on so-cial media is not always cringe-worthy. In-stead of condemning social media together, I prefer to highlight the astounding sharp-ness of its double-edged sword: empower-ing and destructive.

However, these online drinking binges have me wondering if the former outweighs the latter.

pushed up against a post or holding on for dear life to a bar above your head as the bus makes sharp turns and sudden stops. And if you’re on the shorter side holding on to that bar can feel like you’re on a medieval torture rack.

Throw in backpacks, lunch bags, purses and bulky winter coats and the walls are not only closing in but they’re pungent and clammy. This does not make for a pleasant experience.

Shuttle buses are often crammed because students need to make it to their classes and they can’t afford to wait for the next bus to arrive. Not only do students have to wait the 20 to 25 minutes for the next bus to arrive but there’s also the 25 minute ride itself, which adds up to 50 minutes. This makes students desperate to get on the first shuttle bus.

Therefore the university either needs to double the number of buses leaving at the same time or else decrease wait times so that if one shuttle bus is full the next one will be along in five minutes, leave in five minutes and allow students to make it to class without being made into the equiva-lent of a sardine in a can.

Is this a first world problem? Is this need-less griping over being uncomfortable? Per-haps, but it’s not just about personal com-fort, it’s also about safety.

Although as far as we are aware there have been no accidents on board the shuttle bus, passengers are likely to suffer bruises, strained arms and legs and are at risk for a number of potentially more serious injuries.

Just because it hasn’t happened yet doesn’t mean some unfortunate student won’t lose their balance on a sharp turn

and either knock into other students or be thrown into a post or onto the floor. This could result in their being stepped on, bang-ing their head, twisting an ankle or a wrist, spraining a knee, or worse.

Also, what’s wrong with wanting to be comfortable? If students are paying for the shuttle bus service, shouldn’t it be an expe-rience they enjoy?

The live mapping screens that show where the bus is are not really useful. Who cares where the bus is? If it’s not at the bus stop to pick you up, then it doesn’t matter that it’s on Sherbrooke, you’re downtown, that’s not going to help you. What would help you is if there was another bus you could get on that wasn’t full to bursting that would get you to class on time. Why wasn’t money spent on more buses instead of flashy-but-useless screens?

17Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014 //

Pros & CoNs // oPINIoNs

today’s fashion allows for more flexibility and provides a better means for self-expression

our generation, reliant on label-worship and reviving old trends, is stuck in a sartorial slump

Think about the outfit you’re wearing right now. I bet you hardly thought twice about what you put on this morning. Now imagine this was 50 or so

years ago. Do you think you’d still be able to wear that outfit? Probably not.

Take a look back at the trends of the past: men wore suits, women wore skirts and dresses. Everybody always looked prim and proper, like they came straight out of a catalogue. If you’ve seen any pe-riod film, you know that it’s true.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look polished all the time; if anything, their dedication is something to be admired but it now comes off as rigid. These looks left no room for imagination or individuality. Nowadays, we’re able to do so much more with our clothing than we ever could be-fore.

Women could never pull off some of the revealing outfits they wear today back in the ‘20s or ‘30s, and men who wore skinny jeans would probably have been ridiculed. But now, we hardly even bat an eye when we see somebody walking down the street wearing a strange or quirky outfit because that’s what is normal for us. A man wear-ing heels and leggings? Just a regular day in downtown Montreal. A girl wearing a crop top and cut off shorts? Looks like summer is coming!

MArCo sAvErIANoAssistant opinions editor

lINdsAy rICHArdsoNInterim opinions editor

“Think about the outfit you’re wearing right now. I bet you hardly thought twice about what you put on this morning.”

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a brief summary of the fundamental issue with the way we dress today: we’re too damn nonchalant and generally a little lazy.

The idea of dressing “casually” is really just a euphemism. I am struck with a deep pity for Generation Y. Have I become too judgemental, or have we, as a society, become perpetually sloppy?

Yes, the fashion of the “golden age” comes off as significantly more rigid than what we see on the daily in 2014. However, the biggest dif-ference between modern “fashion” and its sar-torial counterparts of the past is the time-worn emphasis on quality.

Yes, people dressed similarly back in the ‘50s and ‘60s, but this was due to the fact that supply was rather limited. It was normal to own only a standard set of clothing: blouses, skirts, slacks, sturdy shoes, etc. A concise wardrobe, absolutely, but one that usually upheld a stan-dard of quality that is hard to find in our mod-ern “made in China” retail environments. What distinguished people from one another at the time, what defined their true creativity, was the well-honed ability to put themselves together in creative ways, despite sparse options.

Style, real style, is the ability to work with what you have.

Fashion has become a way for us to ex-press our individual styles. We’re all dif-ferent, and our clothes reflect that. We’re able to be ourselves. We don’t need to al-ways look like we stepped out of a movie — though it doesn’t hurt every once in a while.

In today’s society, we’re more or less free to dress however we want. If you have an off day, what the hell, why not wear sweatpants and a T-shirt? If you feel like dressing up, throw on a pair of kitten heels or a starched shirt and tie, and hit the town. Some people seem to put next to no effort into their looks, but if that’s how they like it, then who are we to judge them?

We have so many options, and that means we can have fun with what we wear. Each season brings new and experi-mental trends that we can shape to suit our style. We can reinvent ourselves as often as we want. It would’ve been pretty hard to do that during a time when everybody basically looked exactly the same as each other. When you wanted to break free from the norm back then, you became an out-cast. That’s not to say that doesn’t happen anymore, but it definitely takes a lot more than a woman wearing a pair of pants to cause a full-on controversy.

The golden years may have brought a touch of refined glamour that will always be an inspiration to the fashion world. We’ll never forget the classic style icons like Audrey Hepburn or Marilyn Monroe, but it’s time for an update. Who has the time to look that put together every day? Not me!

Today, we are fashion and luxury gluttons. More is more. There is no shortage of options or trends to experiment with, and our clothes are expected to speak for us. Designers reign supreme, and head-to-toe labels are what con-stitute, to some, a regular “everyday” outfit.

Labels don’t speak to anything but the size of your stock portfolio or your line of credit, yet they are continuously mistaken to be the epito-me of elegance and status. Frankly, the standard female uniform in winter — Rudsak or Canada Goose coat, Pajar boots, Michael Kors or Long-champ purse — is redundant and tacky.

It’s funny, for a generation that asserts their “uniqueness” and that takes pride in their abil-ity to express themselves through clothing, I’m seeing large groups of people looking very much alike.

Also, unlike the ‘50s and ‘60s, it is seem-ingly much harder to implement new and exciting trends today. Millennials thrive off of this concept of “reviving” or “reinventing” old styles and patterns of dressing. Think along the lines of “nouveau grunge,” the rebirth of shoulder pads, and the second wave of plastic neck chokers. Its amazing how we, as a society, think we have such a definitive wardrobe when we are essentially recycling old ideas and pass-ing them off as our own.

People are quick to cite Marilyn and Audrey as their style icons, yet the way they dressed and carried themselves has little to no reso-nance now. We use words like “distressed” and “carefree” to justify the fact that we are willing to go out in ruined or ill-fitting clothes. The idea of investing time and attention to the way we look is slowly slipping. Classiness (as conveyed by clothing) is a seriously underrated virtue.

what’s your take on the subject? send a letter to the editor at opinions@theconcordian.com if you have something to add to the discussion.

C o n sP r o s

The Concordian’s editors go head-to-head on today’s head-to-toe looks

theconcordian18 // Tuesday, MaRCH 11, 2014

Humour // oPINIoNs

sAMANtHA suMMErs university of toronto (CuP)

TORONTO (CUP) — Patrons of a downtown Starbucks were shocked yesterday when a fellow patron had coffee thrown at her

by barista Crystal McAdams. Loretta Lafont, age 20, only meant to get a cup of coffee before heading to her afternoon chemistry tutorial. Instead, she found herself sporting burns after being attacked by McAdams.

Humour: Starbucks barista finally snapsRajesh Sharma, who was standing behind Lafont in line, saw the whole ordeal.

“It was really strange,” he says. “I mean, this girl – Loretta, I guess – just ordered a medium black coffee and then that crazy barista started screaming and throwing cups of coffee at her.”

According to other onlookers at the scene, McAdams was overheard shouting, “It’s called a grande! A fucking grande! Not a goddamned medium!” All the while, Lafont cowered behind her purse, attempt-ing to dodge the scalding beverage being thrown her way.

“Everyday, I hear the same thing from customers,” a seething McAdams told re-porters later. “I’ll have a medium, a medi-um, a goddam medium. But we don’t serve mediums, you see? We serve grandes.” Mc-Adams then broke off into maniacal laugh-ter and was led away by a member of the Toronto police force.

It is unclear at press time if McAdams will face charges for assault; however, it has become clear that her employment with Starbucks will be terminated at this time.

“We see it from time to time,” McAd-ams’s manager, James Tyler, said. “We call

it ‘The Madness’. Sometimes a barista just gets too invested, you know? They get in too deep and there’s no coming back from it. That’s when we have to let them go. It’s rough but that’s the business.” Typically employees who have suffered from “The Madness” end up in need of extreme psy-chological counselling. As of press time, Loretta is expected to make a full recovery from “The Madness.”

Said Lafont, “So is anybody going to get me that coffee? The service here is unbe-lievable,” while still nursing burns from the scalding hot coffee thrown at her.

wordsearch // oPINIoNs

Word Bank

Concordia’s weekly,

independent student

newspaper.

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Vol. 31 Issue 24

theconcordian

Amanda L. ShoreEditor-in-Chief

editor@theconcordian.com

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music@theconcordian.com

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sports@theconcordian.com

Lindsay RichardsonInterim Opinions editor

opinions@theconcordian.com

Keith RacePhoto editor

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Copy editorscopy@theconcordian.com

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Davis, Andrew Maggio, Angela De Cicco,Frédéric T. Muckle, Ol-ivia Ranger-Enns, Elijah Bukreev,

Tomer Shavit, Robin Stanford, Julia Vo,Paul Traunero,

The questions have been nagging us for a decade: did

Damien ever get his pink shirt back? Does Aaron still look sexy with his hair pushed

back? Did “fetch” ever hap-pen? Luckily, Mean Girls fans

will likely be getting some answers. Both Lindsay Lohan and Tina Fey have confirmed that there is a reunion in the

works, and baby Plastics everywhere are rejoicing.

Get out the cheese fries and toaster strudel, and prepare to (once again) be personally victimized by Regina George.

Contributors

CuP // EtC

@arealBf Mean Girls came out 9 years ago and it’s still the most relevant thing I’ve ever seen. @commonwhitegal If you’re a girl and you’ve never seen Mean Girls then why are you even a girl. @veronicagrandex That was a Mean Girls quote. That means it’s not offensive. @emmamorreale We only care about Miley’s new hair cut and a mean girls reunion, not caring if a plane crashes and 300 people are missing or dead. @betchesluvthis Unlike fetch, a MEAN GIRLS REUNION is happening. @gabriellecee I hope the mean girls reunion shows Kadey being ran over by a bus, it will explain Lindsay’s terrible face. #MeanGirlsReunion @originalleeMays A “Mean Girls” reunion is happening, because the profits from the original movie went right up Lindsay Lohan’s nose. @hcarkansasThere is a Mean Girls reunion in the works........... Will we finally get to meet Glen CoCo?? @jodie_crossland Mean girls reunion would be the best thing ever unless they killed it and then I would have to kill people @eleanor_banks This mean girls reunion thing better not be a lie because I don’t think I can emotionally deal with that kind of heartache @oh_goody Can you believe it ’s been 10 years since we started wearing Pink on Wednesdays? #MeanGirlsReunion

Photo by Jessica Romera

Art: Hybrid Bodies @ Phi Centre until March 15Art Matters @ Throughout Montreal until March 21Noble, Jin, Friesen and Flannigan @ FOFA until March 28Déviant Élixir @ BBAM! until March 28Oscillations of the Visible @ Leonard and Bina Ellen Gallery until April 12Automatic Ruins @ OBORO until April 12Illustrating Medicine @ Media Gallery until May 1Peter Doig: No Foreign Lands @ MMFA until May 4

Theatre:Horror Story @ Segal Studio until March 14Deaf Snow White @ Players’ Theatre until March 15The Aeneid @ La Chapelle Theatre until March 15Rodin/Claudel @ Les Grands Ballet until March 22Motherhouse @ Centaur Theatre until March 23Glengarry Glen Ross @ Segal Centre until March 30

Music:Bliss with Nomads on Wheels @ Divan Orange March 11Jason Rosenblatt @ Bily Kun March 11Felix Stussi Duo @ Bily Kun March 12Groenland @ Corona Theatre March 13Islands with Escondido @ La Sala Rossa March 13Full Moon TV Show Party @ L’Abreuvoir March 16

Other:Art Management Workshop with Jane Needles @ QDF until March 12My Brooklyn @ Cinema Politica March 17Art Souterrain festival @ Underground City until March 16

Events of the Week