Volume Issue

The Caregiver's Voice

For People Caring for Family, Friends, &

Neighbors

Inside this issue

Communicating through Behaviors Workshop Schedule

2

2018 Caregivers Appreciation Dinner Pictures

2

The Rewards and Challenges of Parenting the Second Time Around

2

Family Caregiver Support Groups

3

Join our Mail List 4

DoAD Programs 4

Winter 2019

The Caregiver's Voice is a quarterly publication of

the AA County Department of Aging &

Disabilities' National Family Caregiver Support Program. Contact us at:

410-222-4339/4375 or

caregiver_support@aacounty.org

The Anne Arundel Co. Department of Aging &

Disabilities is grateful for our sponsors; however the

Department does not endorse any particular vendor or

business. Anne Arundel Co. reserves the right to approve

and/or refuse potential sponsors.

Winter-Spring 2019 Caregiver

Discover the Programs Department of Aging & Disabilities Staff Staff will share the myriad of services offered by the Department for older adults, individuals with disabilities, and caregivers.

Wednesday, Jan. 9, 2019: 1:30-3:00 pm North County Office/Hein Bldg. 7320 Ritchie Hwy., Glen Burnie

What the Sacred Sorrow of Grief Can Teach Us Chesapeake Life Center Explore the grieving process; learn what is “normal,” what to expect, how to manage your own grief and help those around you.

Wednesday, Mar. 6, 2019: 1:30-3:00 pm North County Office/Hein Bldg. 7320 Ritchie Hwy., Glen Burnie

The Mechanics of Caregiving Ben Ogundip, PT Come learn how to help your loved one with the activities of daily living without jeopardizing your own health as Ben demonstrates injury prevention strategies related to caregiving duties.

Thursday, Mar. 14, 2019 (6:30-8:30 pm) Annapolis Senior Activity Center 119 S. Villa Avenue, Annapolis

Legal and Financial Advance Planning Elena S, Sallitto, J.D. It is normal to feel overwhelmed by the details of legal and financial planning but creating a plan for your future can be empowering and ensure your wishes are met. The sooner you establish your legal plans, the better prepared you and your family will be.

Thursday, April 4, 2019: 6:30-8:30 pm Pascal Senior Activity Center

125 Dorsey Road, Glen Burnie

Successful Transitions Mikki Firor, M.S., Gerontologist Whether it is from their home to yours, from home to an assisted living community, or from assisted living into dementia care, moving can be a time consuming, and potentially traumatic decision. Ms. Firor will share some to help you feel confident in your decision and make the transition go smoothly for your loved one.

Thursday, May 9, 2019: 6:30-8:30 pm Annapolis Senior Activity Center 119 S. Villa Avenue, Annapolis

Continued on page 3

Pre-registration is requested for workshops so that we can ensure enough materials are available. Register online at www.aacounty.org/aging or by calling 410-222-4375/4339.

Anyone needing accommodations must contact Mary Chaput at 410-222-4339 or by e-mail at agchap01@aacounty.org at least seven days in advance of the event. TTY users, please call via

Maryland Relay 7-1-1. All materials are available in an alternative format upon request.

Page 2 The Caregiver's Voice

For People Caring for Family, Friends, & Neighbors

Communicating through Behaviors

with Dementia Live™

This workshop encompasses an experiential learning tool followed by a debriefing and educational component to help participants better understand dementia behaviors. The workshop heightens empathy for individuals living with dementia and promotes a better

understanding of dementia behaviors. Participants will be equipped with communication skills to improve care and reduce caregiver stress. Space is limited; registration by phone (410-222-4375/4339) is required. The workshop is held at the Department of Aging & Disabilities, North County Office, 7320 Ritchie Highway, Glen Burnie. The 2018-2019 schedule can be found below:

Wednesday, Jan. 16, 2019: 1:00-3:-00 pm Thursday, Mar. 28, 2019: 6:30-8:30 pm Thursday, May 23, 2019: 6:30-8:30 pm

Pre-registration is required for these workshops. To register, call 410-222-4375/4339.

When parents are absent or unable to raise their children, grandparents are often the ones who step in. Raising a second generation brings many rewards, including the fulfillment of giving your grandkids a

sense of security, developing a deeper relationship, and keeping the family together. It also comes with many challenges. No matter how much you love your grandkids, taking them into your home requires major adjustments. But with the right guidelines and support, you can roll back the years and make a real difference in the lives of your grandchildren.

Also known as “kinship care,” a growing number of grandparents are now taking on the parenting role for their grandchildren, thus foregoing the traditional grandparent/grandchild relationship. This often means giving up your leisure time, the option of traveling, and many other aspects of your independence. Instead, you once again take on responsibility for the day-to-day maintenance of a home, schedules, meals, homework, and play dates. And if it was a tragic circumstance that required you to step into the role of parent, you’ll face many other stress factors, such as coping with your own and your grandchildren’s grief.

But raising your grandchildren, while challenging, can also be incredibly rewarding. Yes, you may have to deal with colicky babies or moody teenagers, but you’ll also experience a much greater connection to your grandchildren’s world, including their school and leisure activities. You may also find yourself rolling back the years, rejuvenated by the constant companionship of much younger people. And you can derive immense satisfaction providing your grandchildren with a safe, nurturing, and structured home environment in which to grow and feel loved.

Tip 3: Your grandkids will have mixed feelings too Moving to a new home is never easy, even in the best of circumstances. When children are dealing with the loss of regular contact with their parent or parents, the move is even harder. It will take some time for your grandchildren to adjust, and in the meantime,

The Rewards and Challenges of Parenting the Second Time Around

Melinda Smith, M.A., and Jeanne Segal, Ph.D. (www.HealthGuide.org)

(Continued from the Fall 2018 edition of the Caregivers’ Voice.)

they may act especially contrary and difficult. And if the children have suffered from emotional neglect, trauma, or abuse, those wounds will not disappear just because they are now in a safe place. They will need time to heal. Your grandkids may resent being separated from their parent and wish to return, even if their home situation was dangerous or abusive. Don’t take this personally. The parent-child bond is powerful. Even if the children are old enough to understand that they’re better off with you, they will still miss their parent and struggle with feelings of abandonment. Your grandkids’ feelings may come out in many ways, including behavior. They may lash out with aggressive or inappropriate behavior, or they may withdraw and push you away. No matter their behavior, your grandkids need your comfort and support. If you start to get angry or upset, put yourself in their head. Picture what they’ve been through, and the confusion, mistrust, and fear they’re probably feeling. Tip 4: Focus on creating a stable environment While it will take your grandkids time to adjust to their new living arrangement, there are things you can do to make the transition easier. Above all, your grandchildren need to feel secure. Children thrive in an environment that is stable and predictable. Establish a routine. Routines and schedules help make a child’s world feel safe. Set a schedule for mealtimes and bedtimes. Create special rituals that you and your grandchildren can share on weekends or when getting ready for bed. Encourage their input in their new home. Let your grandkids help pack and move in their things to the extent that they’re able for their age. Encourage them to decorate their new room and arrange things as they’d like. Having some control will make the adjustment easier.

Continued on page 3

2018 Caregivers’ Appreciation

Dinner!

Page 3

Family Caregiver

Support Groups

Jennifer Sapp, MSW, MSG

facilitates monthly support groups at the following locations:

Department of Aging & Disabilities North County Location

7320 Ritchie Highway, Glen Burnie 1:00-2:30 pm

January 9th

February 13th March 13th

Department of Aging & Disabilities

Annapolis Location 2666 Riva Road, Suite 400, Annapolis.

1:00-2:30 pm

January 15th February 19th March 19th

The 2019 Support Group schedule is

available on-line at http://www.aacounty.org/aging

or by calling 410-222-4375.

For information on additional caregiver support groups, as well as support groups specific to cancer, diabetes, cardiac, stroke, Parkinson’s disease or other chronic diseases groups, call (410) 222-4375/4339 or email: caregiver_support@aacounty.org.

When Anne Arundel County schools are closed or close early due to

inclement weather, support groups are cancelled that day.

Accepting a New Reality: Joining Them on Their Journey Mary Chaput, M.S., CDP It is natural to feel frightened, frustrated and angry when a dementia intrudes on your relationship. Accepting our loved one where they are on their journey enriches ours. Come learn ways to maintain your connections when dementia rears its ugly head.

Wednesday, May 15, 2019: 1:30-3:30 pm North County Office/Hein Bldg. 7320 Ritchie Hwy., Glen Burnie

Communicating through Behaviors: Part II Mary Chaput, M.S., CDP

See description for Nov. 29, 2018 workshop. Thursday, Jun. 6, 2019: 1:30-3:30 pm

North County Office/Hein Bldg. 7320 Ritchie Hwy., Glen Burnie

Safe Passages Hospice of the Chesapeake What is the difference between hospice and palliative care? How do you recognize when that care is needed and where you can find services? Hospice of the Chesapeake staff will share their expertise and answer these and other questions about finding comfort with chronic illnesses and end-of-life care.

Thursday, Jun. 13, 2019: 6:30-8:30 pm Pascal Senior Activity Center

125 Dorsey Road, Glen Burnie

Winter/Spring Caregiver Workshops

(continued from page 1)

The Rewards and Challenges of Parenting the

Second Time Around (continued from page 2)

Set up clear, age-appropriate house rules and enforce them consistently. Children feel more secure when they know what to expect. Loving boundaries tell the child he or she is safe and protected. Make sure that each grandchild has a private space. If grandchildren are sharing a bedroom, get creative: use a divider to partition off a private area in a bigger room, erect a playhouse in the backyard, or set up a tent in the family room. Offer your time and attention. You can be a consistent, reassuring presence for your grandkids. Try to make time to interact with them at the beginning of the day, when they come home from school, and before bed Tip 5: Encourage open & honest communication Communicating openly and honestly with your grandchildren is one of the best things you can do to help them cope with their new situation. It’s especially important to take the time to really listen to your grandkids. In this difficult time, they need an adult they can go to with

their questions, concerns, and feelings. Plan regular times when you sit and talk to each other, free from TV, phones, games, and other distractions. Encourage your grandchildren to talk about their feelings, both good and bad. Try to listen without judging or dismissing their feelings. Help your grandkids learn to identify their emotions. For example, if your grandchild seems upset, you might say, “You look sad. Is something bothering you?” Young children communicate through play. Young children may not be able to verbalize how they feel, but will express themselves through their play. It’s okay to say, “I don’t know.” You don’t have to have an answer for everything. If you don’t know when mommy’s coming home, for example, be honest about it. Don’t evade the question or lie to your grandchild, as this won’t make him or her feel better. Instead, talk with your grandchild about what happened and how they feel about it.

27th Annual Caregivers’ Conference

Saturday, April 13, 2019

The Hotel at Arundel Preserves Hanover, MD

Registration will begin in March 2019.

Workshop Inclement Weather Policy If schools are closed or if schools close early due to inclement weather, caregiver workshops will be cancelled. You can check the county’s school schedule at www.aacps.org, or you can sign up for school closing alerts with any of the local television or radio stations.

7320 Ritchie Highway

Glen Burnie, MD 21061

National Family Caregiver

Support Program

Phone: 410-222-4339/4375

Email: caregiver_support@aacounty.org

Web: www.aacounty.org/aging

Information & Assistance (I&A)

Adult Evaluation & Review Service (AERS)

Adult Public Guardianship

Americans with Disabilities Act Office (ADA)

Assisted Living Facilities Program

Evidence-Based Health Promotion

Long-Term Care Ombudsman/Resident Advocate

National Family Caregiver Support Program (NFCSP)

Respite Care Referral Program (RCRP)

Senior Activity Centers

Senior Care, Senior Center Plus

Senior Nutrition Program

Supports Planning

State Health Insurance Assistance Program (SHIP)

Telephone Reassurance Program

Volunteer Programs

Anne Arundel County County Executive Steuart Pittman Arundel Center 44 Calvert Street Annapolis, MD 21401

Pamela Jordan, Director Department of Aging & Disabilities A Maryland Access Point Program Heritage Office Complex 2666 Riva Road, Suite 400 Annapolis, Maryland 21401 Phone: 410-222-4257 Fax: 410-222-4360 www.aacounty.org/Aging

Family Caregiver Support Program Staff Mary Chaput, Program Director Patricia Lortie, NFCSP Coordinator Dee Scharff, RCRP Coordinator 7320 Ritchie Highway Glen Burnie, MD 21061

For information on sponsoring an edition of the Caregivers’ Voice, contact Mary Chaput at

410-222-4339 or email caregiver_support@aacounty.org.

To join the NFCSP mail list and receive information regarding up-coming workshops and conferences, or to receive the Caregivers’ Voice

by email, call 410-222-4339 or email us at: caregiver_support@aacounty.org

Back issues of the newsletter are available on the Family Caregivers’ website at

www.aacounty.org/aging).

Anyone needing accommodations to caregiver events must contact Mary Chaput

at 410-222-4339 or by e-mail at agchap01@aacounty.org at least seven days in advance of the event. TTY users, please

call via Maryland Relay 7-1-1.