The Boy Who Cried Injustice
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Transcript of The Boy Who Cried Injustice
One day, there was a boy named Hasten.
Hasten didn’t like Apple,
So one day Hasten called tech support to bother them and a
black man answered him.
“Why haven’t you given me Bear Arms? The second
amendment promised me Bear Arms? Why haven’t I received new arms yet?”
Hasten asked the man.
“Ummm, sir, this is Apple.
Not to mention, sir, you do know
that you don’t get actual Bear Arms, right? It means you can
carry a gun,” the black man said.
“What do you mean no Bear Arms? I need to worship the Bear Arms! The first amendment
states that I can worship what ever I want, and I want to worship Bear Arms! While you’re
ruining my dreams, I suppose you’re going to make me house you too. You can’t do this to me! I’m sixteen; I voted against this!” Hasten
cried.
“Sir, do you have any idea what you’re talking about? That was voted on hundreds
of years ago! And what do you mean, quarter you? I’m no soldier, and I’m
certainly not trying to force you to shelter me! Even they couldn’t force you to shelter them according to the third amendment.
By the way, you have to be eighteen to vote, not sixteen. Don’t you know your amendments at all?” the man asked.
“Well, you can’t vote either! You’re black! Slave! Slave!” Hasten said.
“Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to calm down. They abolished slavery
years ago, and they also allowed black suffrage years ago. Really, man, don’t
you know this? It states this very clearly in the thirteenth and the
fifteenth amendment,” the man told Hasten.
“Even if that were true, which I doubt it is, I can say I don’t like that law
because it ‘goes against my rights’ and not follow it! Or, I can convince the
state to change that! Ha, it tells me I can do that in the ninth and tenth
amendment!” Hasten said, happy in his apparent triumph.
“No, this is not an ‘unstated right’ and the tenth amendment doesn’t mean that! It
means that there are things the states get to decide on their own, not that you can disregard the amendment because you
don’t like it! States can’t ignore the amendments!” the man explained to Hasten, trying to repress his irritation.
“Don’t be silly! You obviously have no idea what
you’re talking about! You must be drunk! Alcohol is illegal you know! I’ll have them search you!” Hasten
said.
“While alcohol may at one point have been illegal due to the eighteenth amendment,
the twenty-first amendment repealed that. Not to mention, you can’t have the police
search me when all they have is some stranger claiming I’m drunk! They need
probable cause! That is not probable cause!” the man told Hasten, trying very
hard to stay calm.
“Yes it is! I’ll make sure you have a horrible trail, too! You won’t be allowed a lawyer or a jury,
and they will make you spill all of your dirty secrets!” Hasten
stated.
“What is your problem? The fifth amendment says I don’t have to say anything, the sixth says you
can’t refuse me a lawyer, and the seventh says I have the right to a
jury! What aren’t you getting about this? You’re wrong!” the
man said.
“Stop being ridiculous! You’ll be tried, found guilty, and you’ll be in jail for years
upon years! You deserve it for the lies you’ve told me!”
Hasten yelled.
“Are you kidding me? The eighth amendment says you can’t have
excessive punishment, and if that’s not excessive for doing
absolutely nothing to you then I don’t know what is!” the man
cried.
“Stop spewing these lies! I will make sure you
regret ever saying these things to me!” Hasten
said.
“You know what,” the man said, “I don’t even
know why I’m putting up with this anymore! It’s
ridiculous! Goodbye sir!”
“Wait! No, someone’s trying to get into my house! I need help…,” Hasten screamed,
actually in need of help now. But the man had already hung
up.
For more information on the amendments to avoid ending up like Hasten, you can go to any of the following websites:
Song Form Of Bill Of Rights:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWdfHK6g_C8
Basic List: http://www.ushistory.org/documents/amendments.htm
Constitution and Amendments Explained:
http://www.usconstitution.net/constquick.html
Works Cited
• Forest Bear. (2011). Retrieved October 17, 2012, from Photo Show: http://www.photosshow.com/forest-bear/
• The Lengend of The Apple Logo. (2012, June 23). Retrieved October 17, 2012, from About.com: http://urbanlegends.about.com/b/2012/06/23/the-legend-of-the-apple-logo.htm
• Hart, L. (2010, May 16). The Terminater 'Soaks The Poor'. Retrieved October 18, 2012, from The Exestential Cowboy: http://existentialistcowboy.blogspot.com/2010/05/terminator-soaks-poor.html