The Andalucian - March 2014

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Welcome to our 10th anniversary edition! It has been a decade of interesting stories and articles, puzzles and local news. The magazine started life as Local Connections in 2004, and it was almost five years ago now that it changed and we took over at the helm.

As a family we, too, have been here for 10 years — Claire and I have seen our girls grow up, become completely fluent in a language which still baffles me and even seen Becky, our eldest, leave home as she starts on the next phase of her own journey in life.

All those moons ago, I remember flicking through the early copies of the magazine as it was then — as it remains today — a vital source of information to us as readers. We began our business life here shortly after we arrived and it was this magazine that we always chose to advertise in — it was an excellent platform for advertisers back then, too.

Having lived locally and been in business in Andalucía for all these years we have seen many people and businesses come and go. When we first arrived, our little inland community was on a steady growth spurt until the recession started to bite; sadly this meant that good friends returned to the UK and companies folded — but on the plus side, we have also watched many new people arrive and businesses form, expand and evolve. I don’t normally bang on about the crisis — but I do truly believe that over the next few years, we will see the inland communities grow again. Nothing in life is easy; nothing in life is free — but if you do nothing, you get nothing.

So please, support your local businesses — including the magazine! Let the advertisers know where you heard about them and we’ll keep bringing you the interesting articles and puzzles that you, our readers, enjoy.

One of our readers sent us a lovely email, which I’d like to share with you:‘The Andalucían is the best magazine for miles — I really look forward to it every month. It’s intelligent, informative and funny — keep it up!’

From all of us at The Andalucían — past and present — thank you for your kind comments and we will ‘keep it up!’ Enjoy this special edition and the spring sun, which is finally making a long awaited appearance. Well, my Editor’s Slice just wouldn’t be normal if I didn’t mention the weather, would it?

Till next month

Mike

Hello

Editor’s Slice

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Editor’s Slice

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The Andalucían X5092417DCalle Juanita Romero s/n,Campillos 29320, Malaga

Next deadline: 7 April

We won’t be beaten on advertising prices.

Contact usTelephone: +34 952 723075

Mobile: +34 627 [email protected]: Claire MarriottEditor: Mike Marriott

Special thanks to our writersand contributors

Alice Marriott Fran RajewskiJohn Sharrock Taylor Mark EllisSarah Jackson Tricia Johnson

Spotlight

In 2014 we will reach two major historical milestones. One of them, of course, is the centenary of the start of the First World War, which will be the theme of my article for the April edition of The Andalucían. The other, far more personal to me, is the 50th anniversary, in October, of my matriculation, along with 300 or so other rosy-faced sproglets, into the very first student cohort of the University of Lancaster. The 1960s, with their apparently infinite range of possibilities, were in full swinging swing. And the ‘new universities’ ─ of which we were the newest ─ were part of this exciting scene. ‘Are you Oxbridge or red-brick?’ the middle-aged, middle-class, middle-brow would ask snootily.‘Neither,’ we replied proudly. ‘We’re concrete.’

Among Lancaster’s first undergraduate cohort there is still a persistent rumour that we were specially selected because we were all vivid individualists (there’s an oxymoron in there somewhere) and destined to become stars of the international scene. Self-complacent rubbish, of course, though a few of my contemporaries did make that kind of mark, including the intrepid Middle East correspondent Robert Fisk. When the University celebrated its silver jubilee in 1989 Robert was invited to make the required witty speech at the Alumni dinner but, given his perilous line of work, there had to be a back-up speaker and, as a fairly notorious former President of Debates, this privilege fell to me. Came the day and Robert was pinned down by sniper fire in Beirut, so I donned my father-in-law’s tux (mine having mysteriously shrunk in the years since 1964) and did the business. I’ve been invited back since then so I assume that my first performance wasn’t overly drunken, boring or obscene. I do vaguely remember telling them the following true story.

‘A graduate student in Computing, Ken Todd was my debating partner for such prestigious events as the Observer Mace competition. Ken had a very different approach to public speaking from mine. I wanted to sound witty and erudite beyond my years, which is probably why I adopted a style somewhere between Winston Churchill and David Frost. In contrast, Ken spoke in a flat, rapid catarrhal patter, very like that of his Knotty Ash almost-namesake. I wore a dinner jacket and an academic gown for debates. Ken sported his uniform of black T shirt and black cord trousers. In fact he had several such outfits, and on Observer Mace days he invariably wore his best black T shirt and black cord trousers, though of course nobody but he and I knew this.

The Observer Mace Tournament was always perilous territory for Ken and me. In my case the problem was the one defined by Dr Johnson as ‘Ignorance, madam, pure ignorance’, because the topics tended to require a serious knowledge of modern history and politics which I simply did not possess in those far off days before Wikipedia. Ken’s particular problem was that Mace events were not only serious but surrounded by ceremony, and for Ken, formality was always a red rag to a puckishly iconoclastic bull.

Situated in a lovely little city with a passable castle and an absolutely magnificent cathedral, Durham is the third oldest of the English universities, and prides itself on being almost (but not quite) Oxford or Cambridge. On this Observer Mace evening the home team had fêted the five visiting squads with a splendid dinner, preceded by a reception with the Vice Chancellor and an assortment of local worthies. At one point I found myself sipping amontillado sherry with Sir James Duff, Lord Lieutenant of the County of

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Laughing Roundheads? by John Sharrock Taylor

Spotlight

Durham, who looked and sounded uncannily like Peter Cook’s Sir Arthur Streeb-Greebling.

‘Been readin’ things about this Mrs Gandhi’, said Sir James gruffly. ‘Relative of the Gandhi, doncha know. I’ve had to do with that family before now. Fact is, I hanged her uncle. Nice fellow.’Dinner over, we processed formally into an impressively-panelled debating chamber, gowns akimbo and preceded by the University’s own mace-bearer. The motion for this evening’s debate, ‘This House believes that France has stabbed her allies in the back’, was not a topic I knew anything about but, having been drawn sixth in the speaking order, I was reasonably well able to fudge it. For Ken, speaking at number 12, it ought to have been a doddle, but I could tell from his increasingly bored and distracted air that most of it was passing over his head. I also had a growing conviction that he had taken full

advantage of the social part of the proceedings to imbibe rather more freely than might have been wise. Finally, speaker number 11 round to his weary conclusion and Ken rose portentously to his feet. For a long moment his jaundiced and slightly glazed eye roved slowly over the chamber.

‘Mr President, ladies and gentlemen, all this stuff about General de Gaulle is no doubt extremely interesting,’ intoned Ken, with the air of one who had found it anything but. ‘However, I would like to introduce you to an alternative theory of history. It has always seemed to me that the actions of great men are influenced less by philosophical conviction or even political expediency than by the fact that there are essentially only two kinds of women in the world ─ the voluptuous, nubile women and the frigid women. For instance, at the time of the English Civil War, the cavaliers were married to the voluptuous, nubile women while the Puritans were saddled with the frigid women’

‘Well’, continued Ken with a belligerent glare at his mystified audience, ‘has anybody here ever heard of a laughing Roundhead?’


health & Beauty


With our continuing theme this year of trying to save a few more pennies and become a little more frugal with our budgets, we are looking at the many ways to help ease the pain and discomfort of arthritis. Of course, you must seek medical advice as suffering can differ with this nagging condition. Many will be treating the pain with medication — or maybe some natural treatments ─ but why not try simple and inexpensive household items instead?

These household items can go a long way to helping you deal with your arthritis and ease the pain and discomfort of this debilitating disease. If you have trouble holding a number of things, try using a strip of bubble wrap and packaging tape to help ease your arthritis. Wrap the bubble wrap around the item you are trying to grasp and secure it with packaging tape to make it easier to hold. You can also slice ─ or get someone else to slice ─ the sides of a tennis ball and put it around the item so you can get a tougher grip.

Get some French mustard. Apply it over your joints which ache or take a mustard bath by mixing the mustard with a tub of hot water. Make sure you mix the mustard and water together and soak in the mustard bath for about 15 minutes or until the aches ease.

Before you eat a meal, mix two teaspoons of cider apple vinegar with a glass of water and drink it. Drink this for at least three weeks to help ease the pain of arthritis and help get those joints moving more freely.A mixture of the following household items will help relieve some of the discomfort associated with arthritis. Put three bay leaves and four teaspoons of olive oil in a pan on low heat until it warms; don't let the oil smoke. After it warms, let it cool for about 5-10 minutes, then pour into a coffee filter or a paper cup and apply it to your arthritic joints. You can dab it on or pour the mixture on your joints.

Ease arthritis with

household items

health & Beauty


Another household item that will help ease arthritis is porridge oats ─ but not just eating them (which is great for your overall health but won’t do anything for the arthritis!) Instead, apply them to your affected joints by mixing two cups of oats and one cup of water in a bowl, and warm it in the microwave. A minute at full power should do but don't use it if it is too hot to touch — let it cool. It should be cool enough not to burn your body, and then apply it to those aching joints.

2 Put the raisins in a shallow glass container and pour enough gin into it to just cover the raisins. 3 Cover the container with cheesecloth/linen and allow to stand until the raisins absorb the gin and the remaining liquid evaporates ─ about one week. 4 Each day, eat nine of these "drunken" raisins. 5 Some people have said that it can take six weeks for this remedy to work, so be patient.

Like it hot? Try applying some tabasco sauce to help soothe and ease arthritic joints. Tabasco sauce contains capsaicin, which is a spicy protein that numbs pain. When capsaicin is applied it penetrates into the nerves, reducing pain signals to the brain. If you feel a burning sensation when rubbing the pepper sauce on, apply a thin coat of mint toothpaste to cool the burning.

Whether it's the placebo effect or whether it actually works, gin-soaked raisins are reported to have brought many sufferers some relief. One user said that they didn't realise how much it was helping them until he wasn't able to have his drunken raisins during a holiday. By the end of three days without the raisins, his knees, which had been doing well, were swollen and very painful. Your mileage may vary. This recipe was apparently first described by Paul Harvey in the 1990s. As with any home remedy, consult your doctor and use commonsense when using this. Preparation time does not include the time that it takes for the gin to evaporate.

Ingredients235 ml raisins235 - 475 ml dry gin (enough to just cover the raisins)

Method 1 Before you get started, be sure to read the label of your gin to check that it is made from or includes juniper berries. This is critical!

American TV’s Dr Oz featured this recipe on a show in November 2010. The colour of the raisins doesn't matter; his example used the dark ones commonly purchased at your local supermarket. He said they could reduce the ill effects of rheumatoid arthritis by as much as 50 per cent. Juniper berries contain turpens and raisins contain oleanolic acid and phenols; all of which are known to have anti-inflammatory properties.

Hopefully, this easy-to-make recipe will bring some pain relief to many of you as not only is it delicious, it is very do-able and cheap too!

Book Review

A compelling story of treachery, torture and murder unfolds in this ambitious detective novel, transporting the reader from Stalin’s Russia to Civil War Spain; from Aztec Mexico to pre-war Poland and from Hitler’s Berlin to Churchill’s London.

December 1938, in snowbound Moscow, Josef Stalin has learned that a fortune inSpanish gold has gone missing en route to the Soviet Russian Treasury. Furious, he instructs his vicious henchman Beria to get it back.

September 1940, and the Battle of Britain rages in the skies above London. On the devastated streets below, Chief Inspector Frank Merlin and his officers are investigating the sudden disappearance of Polish RAF pilot Ziggy Kilinski while also battling an epidemic of looting across the capital, unleashed by the chaos and destruction of the Blitz. Among those caught up in Merlin’s enquiries are Kilinski’s fellow pilots, a disgraced Cambridge don, Stalin’s spies in London, members of the Polish government in exile and a ruthless Russian gangster. A violent shoot-out in Hampstead eventually leads Merlin to the truth…and Stalin to his gold. Stalin’s Gold is the riveting second novel in author Mark Ellis’s detective thriller series, following the wartime cases of the enigmatic Chief Inspector Frank Merlin. Stalin’s Gold delivers a fast-paced yet deftly-woven narrative, in which parallel story lines and emotive flashbacks blend to provide an arresting and authentic insight into some of the complex events that preceded the war, and into the extraordinary world of the Blitz and Britain’s desperate battle for survival. Historically accurate and rich in detail, Ellis paints a vivid picture of a European landscape ravaged by war. By charting the intimate lives and domestic difficulties faced by those caught up in the conflict — such as the rampant looting during the Battle of Britain — he offers a powerful portrayal of the human reality of life consumed by an ever-present threat of attack.

“We are quickly propelled into the atmosphere and feel of desperation… we can even share the fear as a plane passes high over the darkened streets and the instinct is to duck into an air-raid shelter… an interesting character and era, and I’d like to read more.” Adrian Magson, crime author and contributor to Shots Magazine.

“Nostalgia, sex and intrigue all rolled into one - great!” Anthony Page, 50 Connect.

About the Author: Mark Ellis grew up in Swansea, Wales, and is a former barrister and entrepreneur. For many years he lived and worked in the USA in New York, Los Angeles and Pittsburgh and now divides his time between Kensington, London, Gigaro in the south of France and Sotogrande here in Andalucía.

Mark’s fascination with the Second World War inspired his extensive research for The Frank Merlin Series; his first novel in the series, Princes Gate, was incredibly well-received.

Stalin’s Gold: A Frank Merlin Novel by Mark Ellis, published by Matador (RRP £7.99 paperback, RRP £9.99 hardback, RRP £3.99 eBook), is available to order online at retailers including amazon.co.uk


Stalin’s Gold: A Frank Merlin novel

JuSt foR fun


1. What is the name of the official national anthem of the USA?2. Which two colours are on the flag of Poland?3. Who has an autobiography entitled ‘Ooh! What a lovely pair’?4. Which actor was the first to play Doctor Who?5. Which is the only US state to begin with the letter ‘P’?6. On a Monopoly board, which street shares the same colour as Leicester Square and Piccadilly?7. What are the names of the two children in the film Mary Poppins?

8. The Eastenders theme tune was given lyrics and released as a single in 1986 by Anita Dobson — but what was the song called?9. Sheila Ferguson, Fayette Pinkney and Valerie Holiday were the original members of which group?10. In which city would you find St Basil’s Cathedral?11. What is the literal English translation of the title of Adolf Hitler’s book ‘Mein Kampf’?12. Salvador Dali made a surrealist sofa, inspired by whose lips?

13. In 2008, Kate Winslet finally won an Academy Award for Best Actress — but which film was it for?14. Paraguay has borders with Brazil, Bolivia and which other country?15. ‘Macavity’, ‘Mr Mistoffelees’ and ‘Memory’ are three songs from which musical?16. Apart from ‘Psalms’, which is the only other book of the Old Testament that begins with a ‘P'?17. The first three films of which child actress were Tiger Bay, Pollyanna and The Parent Trap?18. Which actress links ‘The Darling Buds of May’ and ‘Rosemary and Thyme’?19. In Lewis Carroll’s ‘Alice in Wonderland’, which creature was used as the ball in the game of croquet?20. How many paintings did Van Gogh sell during his lifetime?

Find the answers on page 12

Twenty teasers - mixed bag of

mind-blowing questions

Men’S MatteRS

Having just recovered from a blocked nose I have come to realise how much I was missing my sense of smell. Smells can conjure up some powerful memories. The smell of pine needles can take you back to childhood Christmases or the smell of a laundry detergent can remind you of home. For me, there are certain smells that I’ve come to associate with manliness. Whenever I smell them I think of my dad or grandpa, or some aspect of my boyhood and my initiation into the rites of manhood.

And apparently, I’m not alone. For fun last week, I asked a few of my mates what smells they thought were manly. The response was overwhelming. I decided to pick a few of my favourite responses and let you know. So without further ado, I present manly smells — not that kind!

The DIY store is a smorgasbord of manly smells: paint, wood, fertiliser, metal. It’s all there. As a boy, there was a local store that my dad would go to. He’d lug my brother and me along. We’d open up all the drawers for the hinges and nails and play hide-and-seek in the door displays. Like many smaller stores, it went out of business years ago when the Big Boy stores moved in. The building was torn down and replaced with an upscale shopping centre. But whenever I drive by the corner where it once stood, I can still smell the manliness that once emanated from that place.

Another shop I loved was the barbers — a real barbers, not these unisex hairdressers which smell of soapy shampoo and some chemical colouring agents. It has to be the old fashion spit and sawdust barber and you know why? Because they all smell so damn manly.

I haven’t worked with wood as much as I would like to. But whenever I do, I always try to savour the smell of sawdust. I can remember when I first gained an appreciation of sawdust. It was at that old DIY shop, out back where they had a lumber yard, and I remember getting big whiffs of sawdust as I watched the workers saw wood down to size for my dad. The smell of sawdust also brings back the memory of my dad showing me how to sand my first pinewood derby car. Good times.

Filling your nostrils is the wonderful heady mixture of Barbicide, shaving cream, musky smelling hair and cheap (and free) coffee. The one I went to as a kid also had the faint smell of tobacco from when men would smoke a cigarette and put out their butts in the ashtray on the barber chair arm rests.

The banning of smoking in public places has put paid to all this. As a non-smoker, I am not against the ban, although I do find that cigarette and cigar smoke can be acrid and obnoxious while pipe smoke is, well, just pleasant. Not many men smoke pipes these days, which is a shame because people are missing out on the sweet manly smell of pipe tobacco. A whiff of a nice clove or cherrywood blend summons images of kindly older men in tweed jackets sitting in their chairs next to a warm cosy fire with an old dog nearby.

I’d associate the kindly pipe-smoker with a tumbler of scotch next to him too. The warm, rich, smoky smell of an aged scotch whisky isn’t to everyone’s taste but there’s nothing like the smell of it. To the first-timer, the smell of scotch can be off-putting. But once you get past its initial pungency, you’ll discover a symphony of smell. Each scotch has its


The scents of

a man by A Man

Men’S MatteRS

own distinct smell, but they all share some general characteristics. You’ll definitely smell the smoky peat used during the malting process, but if you get in closer, you might catch the subtle fruity smell of apples or cherries. There’s also a hint of liquorice, which reminds me of kind old men. Taken together, you’re left with a scent that will put hair on the chest of any man who takes a whiff. Scotchy, scotch, scotch.

My Dad would always pour himself a scotch when he sat down to watch Magnum PI but it was the monthly ritual when he would pour the drink and reach for the wooden shoe polish kit that I used to enjoy more than Thomas Sellick’s manly ‘tash on the telly’. The smell of shoe polish is a distinctively manly smell. For many men it conjures up images of brave soldiers shining their shoes to a mirror polish. For me, whenever I crack open a can of Kiwi black shoe polish, I’m instantly transported to my childhood lounge. My dad would roll up the Sporting Times, carry it in to the lounge and carefully cover the carpet with it whilst he placed all his boots on the coffee table — much to my mum’s disgust — to polish them. The theme tune to Magnum P.I. would be started while he did it. The warm smell of shoe polish and leather filled the entire room, and it would usually linger there for an hour after he had finished — again to my mum’s disgust!

The boots themselves were well-worn leather and nothing beats the smell of such a majestic material. Some of the manliest pieces of clothing and accessories are made from leather. I travel straight back to 1974 when I get a sniff of that comforting leather scent — riding horses with my favourite uncle. I loved walking into the stables and taking a deep breath when I reached the tack room. I remember thinking “Man, this is manly.” And, like a fine glass of scotch, leather only gets better with time. There’s the new smell of leather — like a newly

valeted car which I find just as appealing, but this may be just because it’s not often with four kids that I have a clean car!

The great outdoors is a plethora of smells — some good and some bad, from pine trees to pig farms, living here can sometimes be a taste of the senses rather than a treat, but there are still those fragrances which every man just sniffs a hint of and he’s right back to realising that his inner caveman instincts have been heightened!

Most of them involve fire of course! I think every man’s affinity for the smell of gunpowder began at some fireworks display attended as a young lad. That’s where mine did at least. Every November, without fail, the parents would take my brother and I to a Rotary Club display and I can remember being overwhelmed by the smell of gunpowder as the rockets headed into the night sky.

I couldn’t make up my mind if this should be camp fires or bonfires but it’s those memories of starting a camp fire I guess which won over. It’s sunrise. The sky is still grey with a hint of orange and yellow on the horizon. You go over to the fire pit and begin to place dry leaves and small twigs strategically into a tepee shape. You light a match, and watch the leaves smoulder. And then it reaches you — the first bit of smoke from a campfire you made all by yourself. You suddenly feel manlier. But the smells don’t stop there. Throw in some pine or other logs and you up the manly smell quotient a few marks.And the campfire smell stays with you when you go home. It gets in your clothes and in your hair. You never really notice it until you walk into a clean house. The contrast between your smoky-smelling self and your antiseptic home gives you one last chance to revel in the manly scent of a campfire, before you watch it get washed down the shower drain.

Continued on page 12


Men’S MatteRS

I love tearing open a bag of the black stuff and letting that waft of charcoal goodness hit me right in the nose. It’s a smell that tells my mind and body that summer is officially here. But the smell only gets better when you throw a match on them and watch them turn from black lumps of coal to glowing red stones, ready to cook any meat you throw on it. The art of cooking outside on the BBQ is the height of most men’s summers and I’m convinced this is the Neanderthal nostril which lingers in all of us.

To me, the ultimate nature smell is the same as for many men: mowing the lawn is the bane of their existence. But even if you hate the actual chore of mowing, you can’t deny that the smell of fresh cut grass is pretty darn manly. I love the smell of the grass bag as I empty it onto the compost heap. And I actually quite enjoy how I smell after I’ve cut the green stuff. It’s a combination of cut grass, gasoline and body odour. I’ll even delay taking a shower just so I can revel in my manly scent.

But when I’ve had that shower there’s nothing more manly than Old Spice! These days you can go to any men’s section in a department store, and you’ll see a ridiculously big display of 60€+ bottles of cologne

with foo fooey scents. Walk into any local chemist and you can find manliness in a bottle for less than a tenner.

Before they made deodorant, Old Spice was known for its cologne. Chances are your grandpa did and/or still does wear Old Spice. They still make it but it doesn’t get much play these days, which is a shame. Based purely on anecdotal evidence, women seem to love a man who wears Old Spice cologne. It reminds them of their grandfathers. They’re not hot for their grandpas; obviously, they’re just keen on the smell of old-fashioned manliness. When they get a whiff of you sporting Old Spice they’ll instantly associate you with a time when men were men. Quit dousing yourself in Calvin Klein or gassing yourself in a cloud of Lynx body spray and get some Old Spice. The old ones are always the best!


1. The Star-Spangled Banner2. Red and white3. Ant and Dec4. William Hartnell5. Pennsylvania6. Coventry Street7. Jane and Michael Banks8. Anyone Can Fall In Love9. The Three Degrees10. Moscow11. My Struggle12. Mae West13. The Reader14. Argentina

15. Cats16. Proverbs17. Hayley Mills18. Pam Ferris19. A hedgehog20. One

Twenty teasers from page 9

ChaRity newS


325,000€

ChaRity newS

Dear challengers and supporters, first of all thank you for joining our international team and we wish you a sporti-ful 2014 challenge.

So, here we are - the last stretch before the start of the 5x50 Challenge 2014

We would also like to present a new team charity Acompalia. Why support Acompalia? Well, whether you are an expat or a Spanish resident of Granada/Jaén the one thing we all have in common is that we are all part of an ageing population. But whether you are young or old, palliative or hospice care – specialised care for terminally ill patients – can become an increasingly important issue for our loved ones, and may sadly even be something we need to consider for ourselves as well. Research shows that: 1) most people want the choice to die at home or in sympathetic surroundings, with their families at hand. 2) They want effective pain relief and appropriate but non-intrusive medical care. 3) Patients want their loved ones to feel supported – emotionally and practically – during and after the patient’s last days. Acompalia is helping meet these requests.

One important service offered is the Acompalia telephone helpline. When a loved one is diagnosed with cancer or another terminal illness, they and their family members can take comfort from talking to someone who really understands their situation. To address this need, the Acompalia telephone helpline has been set up, staffed by trained and caring volunteers. Patients and families can talk through their feelings, and get the (non-medical) emotional and practical support they need at each stage. The helpline is currently open from 10 am to 2 pm Tuesdays and Thursdays, on 634 302 225.

So whether you want to help fundraise, co-organise a sporting event, a market, a tombola or even just make a donation through sponsorship, please join the team and contact Fran Rajewski at [email protected] or Claire Marriott at [email protected].

If you would like to donate rather than participate, you can do so by simply sponsoring this year’s team — please drop your donation (every euro helps) in at Andalucían Auctions in Campillos. We will bring you details of local events being held via Facebook or in The Andalucían magazine — please feel free to pop along to one of our walks or events to support these two worthy charities.

which will kick off on Sunday March 30!

Of course, the idea behind 5x50 is to get you all moving, exercising and ultimately fitter. Whether you want to participate physically or not, maybe you would prefer to see what we are all about through our Facebook page — you just may be inspired to leave the world of social media and start something more physically challenging than clicking a mouse button or two!

This year will see us very active on our Facebook team page with daily yoga poses, daily motivational quotes, daily healthy recipes and all the latest news about events we will organise. So come and visit us, and help us create a buzz https://www.facebook.com/5x50LasSalinas

5x50 is not just for your wellbeing ─ we are also adding to the wellbeing of two very deserving charities here in Andalucía. Which are our chosen team charities this year? We are more than happy to keep on fundraising for the wonderful Cudeca charity. Cudeca’s stated purpose is to change the process of dying to a process of living. “Although we cannot add days to life, in Cudeca we try to add quality of life to days through our special kind of caring,” they say. Among their essential values, we can note Excellency – taking special care of the patient who suffers from cancer or other advanced or terminal disease, and their family, always being faithful to the philosophy of palliative care. Solidarity - engagement with social needs in the framework of the charity mission. Respect and integrity in the relationship with people and institutions (patients, family, volunteers, suppliers, collaborators, donors, sponsors, public or private supporters, etc.). Read more about Cudeca at www.cudeca.org


Get fit and fundraise

with 5x50 By Fran Rajewski

The talented students of Sotogrande International School are preparing their latest musical masterpiece which will be performed on Friday and Saturday March 21 and 22 at Teatro Juan Luis Galiardo, San Roque. On the Saturday, the audience is invited to attend dressed up in 1980s clothes and be part of the fun.

Back to the 80s, in association with Jyske Bank, is a "totally awesome" musical that tells the story of the senior class of William Ocean High School that graduated in the 1980s, as remembered and seen through the eyes of Corey Palmer, who is now 30-something. This pays homage to the music, fashion, films and TV of this great era, including high-energy dance routines, some of the most popular songs ever written and even a Star Wars-inspired dream sequence. It will delight and amuse an audience of any age and the exceptional calibre of

performers takes this far beyond a traditional school play. There will be a free matinee performance for local schools, followed by the two performances on March 21 and 22 which are open to the public.

Tickets will be on sale from the uniform shop of Sotogrande International School, Videola, in Paniagua, Boutique Dani in Marbella and Look Your Best fitness studio in Puerto Banus, priced 5€ for standard entry and 10€ for VIP tickets. VIP tickets include a pre-theatre drinks reception at the school’s boarding house in San Roque and transport to and from the theatre. There will be a free bus service from Marbella to the theatre on March 22 included in the 10€ ticket price.

50 per cent of ticket sales will be donated to The Kindred Project, the school’s student-led Non-Governmental Organisation (NGO), to support their mission of promoting education as a force for good.To find out more about theatre and performing arts at SIS please visit www.sis.ac

thingS to Do


Be transported back to the 80s

health & Beauty

Imagine a gym with pieces of exercise equipment, open 24 hours a day, and even comes complete with a comfortable sofa and TV when you want to take a break. It really is easy to get fit at home — without the added expense of a gym. By modifying the things you already do, you can turn your home into a fat-burning exercise machine without eating up much of your increasingly rare spare time. And these techniques don't cost anything to implement. Here are some ways to get started:

Tube ToningWhat it works: Stomach musclesWhat to do: As you watch TV, sit on the edge of the couch or armchair, brace yourself with your hands, and lift your legs straight out in front of you. Hold for a count of 10. Do as many as you can. Don't worry if at first you can only lift your legs a few inches off the ground. As this becomes easier, slowly move your extended legs to the left and right. This helps work the muscles on the sides of your abdomen as well.If these exercises are too difficult, try this: slowly exhale as you lift your feet off the floor and bring your knees into your chest. Then extend your feet outward just a little bit. Repeat.

Leg up on stairWhat it works: Legs, buttocksWhat to do: Few things are as suited to shaping your legs and derriere as your home's staircase. Each time you head upstairs, do it in slow motion until the muscles in your legs start to feel fatigued. When this begins to get easier, take the stairs two at a time if you can, or stay with single stairs but go even more slowly. If you don’t have a staircase you can always

step up and down, one foot at a time on a single step – start in repetitions of 10, working you way up to 100.

Bag lug shrugsWhat it works: Shoulders, bicepsWhat to do: As you're bringing in groceries, do some shoulder shrugs and bicep curls. Get two bags of roughly equal weight and hold one in each hand. As you make the trip from the car to the kitchen, slowly shrug your shoulders as many times as you can. On the next trip, do bicep curls.

Cleaning cardioWhat it works: Heart, lungsWhat to do: Turn non-strenuous tasks into an aerobic workout simply by adding speed. Bustle through chores as quickly as you can, moving immediately from cleaning glass and dusting to sweeping and vacuuming or mopping without taking a break. You'll finish tedious chores in record time, and you'll be amazed at the cardio workout you'll get.


Intuitive ways to stay fitwithout leaving home!

health & Beauty

Kitchen counter pumpWhat it works: CalvesWhat to do: While you're cleaning vegetables or scouring away at scorched pots, make the most of your time by doing some heel raises. Stand with your feet hip-width apart. Push up so that you're standing on your toes. Hold the position for a few seconds, then slowly lower your feet to the flat position. Repeat until you feel your calf muscles burning slightly. If you have difficulty raising both feet at the same time simply alternate each foot.

Wet laundry squats What it works: Lower back, larger leg musclesWhat to do: Squats work almost every muscle in your lower body and this is a great way to sneak a few in to your routine. Place your laundry basket on top of the washing machine and bend to lift the wet laundry into the basket (or transferring to a tumble dryer), but before you get there, do about 10 squats. Simply hold the basket in front of you, close to your body to reduce strain on your lower back. Place your feet shoulder-width apart, toes angled slightly outwards. Keep weight on your heels and slowly descend into the squat by pushing your hips back as if you were easing into a chair. Keep feet flat on the floor. Stop when your thighs are parallel to the floor. Slowly stand back up straight. Do not attempt a weight which is uncomfortable.

Butt squeezesThe simplest exercise to perform which will help tighten and shape your rear end without you even having to leave your chair. While sitting, simply clench your butt muscles, hold for a count of five, and release. Repeat for two minutes.

Continued on page 20


health & Beauty

Wall squatsThis exercise sounds worse than it is! It is simple to perform anywhere you have a blank wall. Wall squats target the entire lower body. Just stand with your back against a wall, with your feet shoulder-width apart. Slide your feet out 30cms or so from the wall, without allowing your back to leave the wall. Extend your arms out in front of you and slowly bend your knees until you are in a sitting position. Hold for a count of three and slowly return to standing position. Repeat for three sets of 10 repetitions.

Shadow boxThere’s no better way to get rid of any stress and get the heart pumping than with some shadow boxing. Simply take a boxer’s stance and quickly throw punches into the air, alternating arms. To avoid embarrassment, it is best to find a quiet location, or stand near the door. Shadowbox for 60 seconds, or whenever you feel the need to release tension.

Russian twistsRussian twists are an excellent way to work your core, and they can easily be modified to work anywhere you have a seat or table/desk. To perform

Russian twists, sit with your bottom on the edge of your table/desk, or a firm chair. Extend your legs out in front of you and twist your abdomen to the right, while reaching your arms in that direction. Twist toward the left, and repeat for 60 seconds, or until you can’t take the burn any longer.

If all else fails and you still don’t feel motivated to get moving, why not go and enjoy the spring sunshine and have a 30 minutes walk around your village or the local countryside instead!


JuSt foR fun

Kermit the Frog is left handed.

Mickey Mouse is known as "Topolino" in Italy.

101 Dalmatians and Peter Pan (Wendy) are the only two Disney cartoon features with both parents that are present throughout the movie and don’t die in it.

In Disney's "Fantasia", the Sorcerer's name is "Yensid" (Disney backwards.)

Walt Disney had wooden teeth.

Walt Disney's autograph bears no resemblance to the famous Disney logo.

It was illegal to sell ET dolls in France because there is a law against selling dolls without human faces.

Deborah Winger was the voice of ET. Donald Duck’s middle name is Fauntleroy

This year the Jolly Green Giant will turn 85

Tony the Tiger will celebrate his 58th birthday this year

Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots.

Cinderella's slippers were originally made out of fur. The story was changed in the 1600s by a translator, but probably not deliberately. The glass slipper is more likely to have arisen from a confusion between the French, "une pantoufle en vair" (a fur slipper) and, "une pantoufle en verre" (a glass slipper.)

It was the left shoe that Cinderella lost at the stairway, when the prince tried to follow her.

Charlie Brown's father was a barber.

In the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy's last name is Gail. It is shown on the mail box.

The movie playing at the drive-in at the beginning of "The Flintstones" was “The Monster.”

Wilma Flintstone's maiden name was Wilma Slaghoopal, and Betty Rubble's maiden name was Betty Jean McBricker.

On the cartoon show "The Jetsons", Jane is 33 years old and her daughter Judy is 15.

The first Marvel Comics super hero was the Human Torch.

In an episode of The Simpsons, Sideshow Bob's Criminal Number is 24601, the same as the Criminal number of Jean Valjean in Les Miserables.

Slinkys were invented by an aircraft mechanic; he was playing with engine parts and realized the possible secondary use of one of the springs.

If you stretch a standard Slinky out flat it measures 87 feet long.

The hundred billionth crayon made by Crayola was Periwinkle Blue.

The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's "It’s a wonderful life".


25 useless things you just

don’t need to know about...

legal aDviCe


Recommendation on pre-nuptial contractsThe Law Commission for England and Wales has recommended that pre-nuptial contracts – an agreement on financial division of assets during the marriage and in the event of divorce – should become enforceable, provided certain key conditions are met. A pre-nuptial contract would become binding if the couple provided full disclosure of their financial situations at the time the contract was entered into, and if both parties had received legal advice.

The courts would only overturn the agreement if it was used unfairly─ for example if one of the parties tried to avoid their obligations to their children, or either became ─ or placed ─ a burden on the state. For example, a wealthier spouse cannot remain in the matrimonial home if that means the children of the couple have to leave the property without adequate housing to which to move.

Pre-nuptial contracts could still be reviewed by the court to ensure they were fair, but it is wise to get advice on the effectiveness of these agreements both now and once the new proposed legislation comes into force.

Same sex marriagesIn the United Kingdom, same sex couples will be able to marry in England and Wales when the Same Sex Couples act comes into force in March 2014. Scotland has also passed legislation to recognise same sex marriage. It is very likely that Northern Ireland will follow.

Those currently in a civil partnership will be able to covert this into marriage. However at the moment, the legislation or regulations have not provided a mechanism for doing this. The legislation on this point is rather strange as a civil partnership could be dissolved and then marriage entered into, but if the relationship has not broken down irretrievably the civil partnership cannot be dissolved. Hopefully, this gap in the regulations will be closed shortly.

Spain has recognised same sex marriages for a number of years. For British people wanting to marry, a certificate of no impediment is still required.

Pension sharing orders Laws on the sharing of pensions came into force in England and Wales in the year 2000. A detailed study has now taken place and it is surprising that only 14 per cent of cases where pensions were disclosed led to pension sharing orders. Obviously many of these cases were those where older couples divorced and the courts used these provisions to offset differences in capital and income. For example, wives can receive a capital sum to allow a husband to maintain his pension income.

The report also showed that where lawyers were instructed, a wife or husband with no personal pension would be able to get a fairer settlement to include a pension sharing order or to offset the pension against other assets.

In the Spanish courts it is not possible to represent yourself in court in family matters such as divorce, maintenance claims for children and pension sharing applications. This has advantages in that most lawyers will advise on the implications of financial orders on divorce.

For more information on any aspect of Family Law or another legal matter, please contact your nearest De Cotta Law office to book a private consultation. Offices are based in Mijas/Calahonda, Coin, Nerja and Tenerife so visit www.decottalaw.net for details of a branch local to you.

Family law updates By De Cotta Law

For details of how to enter the Bake-Off Competitionor to register a cake please email Liz [email protected] registration must be no later than 20th MarchApplication form can be found on the TAPAS websitewww.tapassociety.com

Spotlight

For details of how to enter the Bake-Off Competitionor to register a cake please email Liz [email protected]

Cake registration must be no later than 20th March

aounD anDaluCia

In late March or early April there will be a very interesting free conference in Loja about legal matters and changes that affect the British living in Spain. It is organized by Gestoría Antonio Lizana (Grupo AVAL member) who practises in Loja, and the prestigious law firm Martinez-Echevarria, Perez and Ferrero, a leading law firm in Andalusia based in Marbella. They are a world leader in dealing with services for ex-pats. It will be conducted in English and the place, exact date, content, duration, etc will be announced soon. To be informed of exact dates and venues, plus to pose any specific questions that you would like to be raised during the meeting, please email [email protected] as soon as possible. Questions of an individual or personal nature will not be discussed during the meeting, but contact can be made with the speaker after the meeting. The meeting is open to all, so please spread the word amongst members of the British community who may be interested in coming to the talk.

The British Benevolent Fund of Madrid (BBF) is one of the oldest English-speaking charities in Spain with records dating back to 1929. It works in conjunction with the British Consulates in Spain and other charitable organisations to provide financial support and other assistance to British nationals who find themselves in severe distress in Spain.

It matters not whether you live here or are just visiting. The committee, which meets once a month, will consider all cases on their individual merit. It is the charity of last resort and cases are referred to us when all other avenues of support have been exhausted, such as UK or Spanish social services, other local charities, family and friends.

Over the years BBF has helped people suffering from Alzheimer's, mental health problems, cancer, learning disabilities, stroke and heart attack victims to name but a few. It has also helped many without any health issues who find themselves isolated and without support due to circumstances beyond their control. Assistance is provided to British people throughout Spain.

If you wish to apply for help email [email protected] or call +34 681 063 462.

Where to turn when every avenue seems to be a dead end?


Unsure how to report a crime to the Spanish Policía Nacional in English?What are your healthcare rights?Know how to renew your passport or get one in an emergency?The answers to these and many other important issues can be found on the Brits Living in Spain Facebook page.

Since its launch in November, a massive 6000 people have already “liked” Brits Living in Spain on Facebook. The secret to its popularity is that it offers both factual information and a lively forum for sharing experiences and reliable information about life in Spain.

“Brilliant… keep up the good work.” “Great page… excellent idea and comments.” “It’s an interesting way to get in touch with other Brits in Spain – and the passport and legal info is good.” These are just a few of the comments posted by followers and contributors to the page. Will Middleton, Consular Director for Spain, says, “We are really pleased with the response so far and with how British residents are sharing the information they find useful with others.”

If you are not yet following us and want to benefit from independent advice and others’ experiences, then please do search for Brits Living in Spain on Facebook and ‘like’ our page.”

Brits Living in Spain is run and moderated by the British Consular network. It is a sister channel to the British Embassy’s UK in Spain Facebook channel, which focuses on institutional and political information.

Residents who are Twitter fans and want to keep up with the latest news from the Consular network can also follow @BritsliveSpain as well as the comments and thoughts of the British Ambassador on @SimonManleyFCO.

If you are already on Facebook, then go to www.facebook.com/BritslivinginSpain and “like” us. If you don’t already have an account it is easy to create one.

Talk on legal matters

affecting you

‘Liking’ free advice on living in Spain

Hi, it’s me - Alice again,

This month has been quite busy with all the local carnivals and preparing everything for my cruise!

The carnival is where people get the chance to dress up and there’s even a costume competition. I went to two this year. The first was in Teba, where I dressed up as Sherlock Holmes – apparently with a skirt which was too skimpy for my big sister’s liking! I did have shorts on as well, though! It was fun but we had bad weather so maybe a short skirt wasn’t the best idea. I also went to the Campillos one the weekend after with Becky – she dressed up as a ballerina – not much length to her skirt either! It was cold but at least it wasn’t raining. The winners were the minions out of the film ‘Despicable Me’. They were great! There was also a soldier out of ‘Toy story’, a lot of Minnie Mouse(s) and so much more! I didn’t dress up, but I enjoyed it and stayed at Becky’s for the night. We got back to Mum and Dad’s just in time for the Sunday roast.

I’m just counting down the days until I go on my cruise with the school – about two weeks to go. I’ve looked through my wardrobe to see if I am missing anything — I might need another pair of shoes – hint to my parents! We are going to stop off at so many places including Mallorca, Rome, Florence and I can’t wait! The best part about it is that I’ll be on the cruise for my 16th birthday. 16 — I can’t wait, not sure what I’m waiting for but you always look forward to a ‘big’ birthday, don’t you? Well, apparently not after so many of them, Mum said.

We’ve also had Semana Blanca. It was a quiet week. But I did get a very early bus down to Malaga to see some friends. I met lots of new friends too. It was a nice day. We walked round the train station, the shopping centre and then the port. It was beautiful! We are planning on meeting up again in the Semana Santa holidays.

I’ve been busy with exams considering that it’s coming up for the end of term. I think I’m doing better than last term. I still have a few exams left, so we will see what my grades are soon. I hope I pass them all!

Love, Alice x


Sherlock, ships and

by Alice Marriott

health & Beauty

Here we are again, about to leap gloriously into spring! The dark days of the damp and mouldy winter will soon be distant memories as the days lengthen. Winter appears to have passed and, just as the onset of primavera triggers the sap to rise in the olive trees that surround us, many of us feel the stirrings of an upsurge in energy.

Our own natural rhythms respond to longer days and warmer weather. It's a time when we move from inward reflection and homely activities to action and socialising. In other words, we've thought a lot about stuff, and now we want to see things happen!

Winter, especially in Spain, is a time for battening down the hatches and staying at home. With the onset of spring we begin to remember the outside world ─ isn’t that why we moved here, to live the outdoor life? We've hibernated, rested, and closeted ourselves in our homes, so now we want to experience the excitement of the outside world!

Our emergence into the public domain can lead to frustrations bubbling up about our health and fitness, dress size, or ‘want-to-do’ lists. Many of us moved to Spain hoping to escape the pressures we experienced in our native land; the pressures of time, the constant focus on needing to ‘look good’, ‘get fit’ and even to ‘accumulate more stuff’ to prove our worth in life. However, many of us find that after a very short period of time, these pressures re-emerge and we often just don't get to make the changes we really want. In spite of our best intentions, we're still smoking, still eating or drinking too much, or still just putting up with that problem that we wish we'd done something about years ago.

Happiness and contentment with life is about so much more than how we look on the outside or to others ─ be that our body shape, our possessions or our bank balance. I was told many years ago never to judge my insides by another’s outsides… however we all do it — constantly. With the onset of spring, could we decide to approach the problem from a different angle? Could we consider addressing the root cause of our discontent ─ ie our mind and the stories we tell ourselves over and over again?

Did you know that in a typical day we humans think anything between 12,000 and 60,000 thoughts, and what’s even more incredible is that a staggering 98 per cent of those thoughts are the ones we thought yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that! The majority of these thoughts are toxic, self critical, destructive and judgemental ones. What is worse is that most of them are directed towards ourselves.

Consider the following:How many ‘could-have’, ‘would-have’, ‘should-have’ statements have you thought today?How many ‘if onlys’ were part of your inner vocabulary today?

How many times have you replayed in your head a conversation or situation that pained you, or one that hasn't even occurred yet?How many times have you criticised your body today?How many times have you referred to and personalised your health issues as ‘my arthritis’, ‘my multiple sclerosis’ or ‘my heart problem?’How many times have you made comments to yourself such as ‘nothing ever goes right for me’; ‘everything I touch fails’; ‘I always mess up’ or ‘'I'm useless’'?


Springtime surges —

let your inner self bloom! by Sarah Jackson

health & Beauty

Does this inner dialogue serve you well? Is it liberating or constricting? How would you react to someone who talked to you in this way, and criticised you to this extent? Would you choose to be in their company? Would you feel good after a night out with them? Would you feel safe to make changes, grow and develop with them as your companion? Is it any wonder that we find it difficult to ‘move on’? That we find it difficult to achieve that body shape we desire, quit the addiction that terrifies us or the relationship that no longer serves us?

Change in our life takes place when we take the time to change the thoughts that we think, change the stories that we continue to play in our heads and break the habits we form and the beliefs we create.

To feel the dissatisfaction with the way our lives remain the same is actually healthy. It is natural to feel the dissatisfaction of being in the same place as we were previously. What is not healthy is the feeling that we have no choice; that we are stuck and are powerless to change.

Unsure how to bring about the changes we want ─ perhaps having tried a number of ways which didn't work - we may feel overwhelmed and trapped. The important thing is to make use of the increased energy available to us in spring to overcome our inertia and take steps to change the things which are holding us back, and preventing us from really enjoying life.

There are various ways to do this; the fastest and most effective by far is hypnotherapy. Find a self-hypnosis class near you or talk to a hypnotherapist. It can't hurt to take that first little step of finding out more — and the process might just put more of a spring in your step than you ever imagined!

Sarah is an advanced hypnotherapy, massage, Reiki and beauty therapist — if you have any comments or questions about this article, please contact Sarah in confidence by email: [email protected] or on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ImesonJacksonHyp or http://www.facebook.com/ImesonJackson and on Twitter at http://twitter.com/ImesonJackson

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Head Office Spain (Mijas): Centro Comercial Valdepinos 1 y 3ªUrb. Calypso, 29649 Mijas Costa (Málaga)

✓ Conflict over taking children overseas after a divorce

✓ Kidnapping and child abduction

✓ Divorce and property

✓ Division of pensions


Electrician all areas covered. Call Tom for a quote on 606 694 536

Gardening – all aspects undertaken. Free quotes. No job to small. Call 952 737643

General handyman and pool cleaner. Reliable and experienced call 680 323649

We are asking for people out there who took out a mortgage in 2004 with Cajasur in Antequera to get in contact with us. We believe we have a case relating to the amount you could be paying on your mortgage. This may be too much because of a fixed rate policy, meaning that the percentage rate would not go lower than 4.59 per cent. We would be interested in forming a group to consolidate on this issue. Your personal details will be treated as strictly confidential, please email your contact details only to [email protected] we will forward them on to private advertiser who wishes to remain anonymous.

SeRviCeS offeReD

ClaSSifieD aDveRtS

vehiCleS foR Sale

pRopeRty foR Sale

eventS

This year’s reunion of the Informal English Speaking Group of Loja will be held on Tuesday, July 1, 12noon to 2pm. Full details will be available nearer the day but put the date in your diary now, as we would hate you miss meeting your old friends! If you know of other English speakers, new arrivals to the area or others, please spread the word. If there are others who would like to be included on the mailing list, please email your address to [email protected]. Keep checking in The Andalucian for more updates.

Situated at foot of Teba Gorge, 4 bed main house plus self-contained 2 bed apartment – ideal for letting/business. Large gardens and pool. Price 275,000€ phone 952749130 or email [email protected]


Local artist Margaret Riordan has two art exhibitions currently running until April at Bar Choto Playa on the N340 at Peñoncillo beach, Torrox Costa, (not Tuesdays) next to Ruta 34 motorcycles shop and in Restaurante Sevillano - El Rincón, Calle Gloria, Nerja for more information email [email protected]

Deposito Legal MA-1110-2004

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TEBA 3 bed, 2 bath 19th century townhouse. Original features, 360m2. Fantastic pool & terrace. Certified Energy Rating C. PRICE REDUCED €299,950Call 627 683380 for details

Advertise your vehicle - ONLY €5 a month. Call 952 723075 or email a photo and details to [email protected]

Are you struggling to sell or rent your home? Whatever your property type - advertise it for only €5 a month or €20 for six months (excludes IVA). Call 952 723075 or email us with a photo and details [email protected]

VW Passat, VGC 2001, 1.8 turbo 150CV petrol, 169000Km, ITV, air con, alloys & much more 3400€ Call 637 146561 (English) or 652 086480 (Spanish)

The Andalucian - March 2014

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Transcript of The Andalucian - March 2014