Sports Culture “Man up.”. Essay Thesis Question: Does the NFL culture of masculinity and warrior...

Sports Culture

“Man up.”

EssayThesis Question:• Does the NFL culture of masculinity and warrior mentality

have to adapt to the current, mainstream culture?

• Examples:• YES: The NFL culture of warrior mentality has to adapt to

the mainstream culture, or else it risks being an institution of discrimination.

• NO: The NFL culture of warrior mentality does not have to adapt to the mainstream culture because the NFL is a game, and not a political or cultural instrument.

EssayMainstream culture: more tolerant, open-minded, forgiving,

NFL Culture: Brotherhood, Brutal, masculine, execution, “Lights out”, homophobic, misogynistic, Savage

EssayNFL Culture: masculine, vicious, pain-driven, aggressive, grueling, courageous, judgmental, highly critical, misogynist

Mainstream culture: proper, acceptance, care-free, hippie-ish, peace and love, tolerant, open-minded, forgiving.

EssayIntro: Imagine Ray Lewis, his face smeared with war paint, lifting a flower-painted, china teacup, pinky cocked, taking a sip and saying, “I do believe we shall emerge victorious today.” This scenario is absurd, and would break the structure of a football team.

Thesis: The warrior mentality and viciousness of the NFL culture does not need to adapt to mainstream culture because it is a game of war and passion, resulting in no need for etiquette or political correctness.

EssayIntro: Imagine a football player, foaming at the mouth, crashing into a quarterback, helping his team win, and after the viscous tackle, he says, “Hey man, sorry about that. I didn’t mean to make you feel any suffering. We are all one. You know, I was bullied in elementary school…and I want to make sure I take care of you, bro.”Thesis: The warrior mentality and viciousness of the NFL culture does not need to adapt to mainstream culture because it is a game of war and passion, resulting in no need for etiquette or political correctness.

EssayIntro: Imagine Ray Lewis, his face smeared with war paint, lifting a flower-painted, china teacup, pinky cocked, taking a sip and saying, “I do believe we shall emerge victorious today.” This scenario is absurd, and would break the structure of a football team. Thesis: The warrior mentality and viciousness of the NFL culture does not need to adapt to mainstream culture because it is a game of war and passion, resulting in no need for etiquette or political correctness.

Football is a war between two competitive teams, whose single objective is to win for themselves and the fans. If one player shows weakness, the entire team collapses, as shown in the article, “Man Up” by Bryan Phillips, (Say)“Warriors make war on warriors. There's no room for crying in this game. You have a problem, you handle it on the field. Handle it as a man. Go down swinging” (Phillips 1). This passage explains (Mean)the raw spirit of competition, which is simply a contest of wills. Weakness can best be erased by taking the field. (Matter )In this case, the problem of

The Counterargument

“I know you are, but what am I?”

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis

Contradicting Evidence

Counter-argument on how evidence Is NOT valid.

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis

Contradicting Evidence

Use an UNMENTIONED VARIABLE to show how contradicting evidence still proves thesis.

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: Pitbulls are one of the friendliest breeds and the ban in Denver should be overturned.

Contradicting Evidence: Pitbulls have the highest rate of attacks on humans.

• Unmentioned variable: THE OWNERS!

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: Pitbulls are one of the friendliest breeds and the ban in Denver should be overturned.

Contradicting Evidence: Pitbulls have the highest rate of attacks on humans.

Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid: This breed of dog attracts owners who are criminals who raise the dogs to fight, training them to have violent tendencies. Like children, mean and violent owners will translate to mean and violent dogs, and most other breeds have owners who want to raise their dogs properly. It’s not the dog breed that is violent but the type of owner who raise them.

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: All types of guns should be legal.

Contradicting Evidence: The Sandy Hook shootings left dozens of children dead.

Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:Work with a partner and come up with why this contradicting evidence can be WRONG. I will give you 3 minutes.

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: All types of guns should be legal.

Contradicting Evidence: The Sandy Hook shootings left dozens of children dead.

Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:Unmentioned VARIABLE: Mental Illness!

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: We should encourage the use of capital punishment in all states.

Contradicting Evidence: Texas has the most executions out of all states, but the murder rate is also the highest.

Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:Work with a partner and come up with why this contradicting evidence can be WRONG (hint, use 3rd variable, low income, low graduation rates, etc. of TX). I will give you 3 minutes.



• Unmentioned variable: Income (low)

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: College athletes should get paid for playing.

Contradicting Evidence: In Slovania, where college players get paid, they have the highest dropout rate in the world.

Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:Unmentioned variable: Slovania’s average income is lowest in the European Union.



Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:Work with a partner and come up with why this contradicting evidence can be WRONG (hint, use low income, low graduation rates, etc. of TX). I will give you 3 minutes.

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: The Lakers are the best team in basketball this season.

Contradicting Evidence: The Lakers have the worst record in the league.

Counter-argument using UNMENTIONED VARIABLE on how evidence is NOT valid:Work with a partner and come up with why this contradicting evidence can be WRONG. I will give you 3 minutes.

Evidence: The Counterargument Thesis: Birmingham Students are the most kind students in all of the valley.

Contradicting Evidence: Birmingham has the highest rate of fights.

Counter-argument on how evidence is NOT valid:Work with a partner and come up with why this contradicting evidence can be WRONG. I will give you 3 minutes.

Thesis: NFL Culture SHOULD NOT adapt to main stream culture.

Quote #1 – COUNTERARGUMENT: Find a quote that CONTRADICTS your thesis.Say: “Sometimes the brain goes sideways, and when that happens, ‘brave’ or ‘cowardly’ shouldn’t even come into it. Seeking help is just the proper thing to do” (Phillips 2).

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize): Phillips explains how brain injuries are not as evident as injuries to the body, such as legs or arms or shoulder.MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):

Although a brain injury is a serious matter, the players do not have the diagnosis skills to assess their teammates, nor is it their responsibility to do so. Richie Incognito is not a psychiatrist, and an NFL player wearing a white lab coat and a stethoscope around his neck is not a realistic expectation. In other words, NFL players are athletes, not doctors, and it is not their responsibility to diagnose and treat players that need help. Critics are asking the NFL players to adapt to an impossibility.


Quote #1 – COUNTERARGUMENT: Find a quote that CONTRADICTS your thesis.Say: “There were so many tough men in that Dolphins locker room. The unwritten code of football is that you handle your business in-house. Any one of these men could have said something to stop Incognito” (Phillips 3).

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize): Phillips explains how the other players in the locker room should have stopped the bullying.MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):

In this case, although the comments by Cognito were severe, the rest of the team thought he was joking, since all of the players went through the same joking.


Quote #1 – COUNTERARGUMENT: Find a quote that CONTRADICTS your thesis.Say: “There were so many tough men in that Dolphins locker room. The unwritten code of football is that you handle your business in-house. Any one of these men could have said something to stop Incognito” (Phillips 3).

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize): Phillips explains that players in the locker room should have confronted Incognito.MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):

In this case, if a player stopped Incognito, it would split the team apart, causing morale to fall, causing losses that would hurt not just the players but the franchise and fans.

Expository Essay Moves1. Take out your hamburger/hamburger paper2. Take out a blank piece of paper. Title it.

Expository Essay Moves1. Introduction of mockery and satire2. Thesis

Paragraph #13. Introduction to quote4. Say #15. Mean#16. Matter#1

Paragraph #27. Transition from matter #1 to next paragraph8. Introduction to quote (Moves 7 & 8 could be the same sentence)9. Say #210.Mean#211.Matter#2

Paragraph #312.Transition into last paragraph13.Restatement of thesis

Paragraph#4

EssayThesis Question:• Does the NFL culture of masculinity and warrior

mentality have to adapt to the current, mainstream culture?

• What are the four most important words of this prompt?

• Talk to a partner.• I will call on you.

EssayThesis The NFL culture of warrior mentality has to adapt to the mainstream culture, or else it risks being an institution of discrimination.

EssayThesis Question:• Does the NFL culture of masculinity and warrior mentality have

to adapt to the current, mainstream culture? Why?

• Although there is value in current NFL culture with winning and achievement, for the most part__________________________________

• YES: The NFL culture of warrior mentality has to adapt to the mainstream culture, or else it risks being an institution of discrimination.

• NO: The NFL culture of warrior mentality does not have to adapt to the mainstream culture because the NFL is a game, and not a political or cultural instrument.

Hamburger Hotdog Paper

Writer’s Name: Tommy KimQuote #1Author: Brian PhillipsTitle: “Man Up”

Say: “

Quote #2Author: Brian PhillipsTitle: “Man Up” Say:

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize):

MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize):

MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?):

THESIS Question: Does the NFL culture of masculinity and warrior mentality have to adapt

to the current, mainstream culture? Why?

Hamburger Hotdog Paper

Writer’s Name: Tommy KimQuote #1Author: Brian PhillipsTitle: “Man Up”

Say: “Sometimes the brain goes sideways, and when that happens, ‘brave’ or ‘cowardly’ shouldn’t even come into it. Seeking help is just the proper thing to do” (Phillips 2).

Quote #2Author: Brian PhillipsTitle: “Man Up” Say: “There were so many tough men in that Dolphins locker room. The unwritten code of football is that you handle your business in-house. Any one of these men could have said something to stop Incognito” (Phillips 3).

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize): Phillips explains how brain injuries are not as evident as injuries to the body, such as legs or arms or shoulder.

MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?): Although a brain injury is a serious matter, the players do not have the diagnosis skills to assess their teammates, nor is it their responsibility to do so. Richie Incognito is not a psychiatrist, and an NFL player wearing a white lab coat and a stethoscope around his neck is not a realistic expectation. In other words, NFL players are athletes, not doctors, and it is not their responsibility to diagnose and treat players that need help. Critics are asking the NFL players to adapt to an impossibility.

Mean (What does the quote “mean”? Summarize): Phillips explains how the other players in the locker room should have stopped the bullying.

MATTER (How does this matter to the thesis?): In this case, although the comments by Cognito were severe, the rest of the team thought he was joking, since all of the players went through the same joking, creating a culture of discrimination.

THESIS: The NFL culture of warrior mentality has to adapt to the mainstream culture, or else it

risks being an institution of discrimination.

Move #1 and 2• Write your thesis after your transition into your

thesis.

(Move #1 Satire/Mockery) Imagine Ray Lewis, his face smeared with war paint, lifting a flower-painted, china teacup, pinky cocked, taking a sip and saying, “I do believe we shall emerge victorious today.” This scenario is absurd,

and would transform the game into a mockery of sport, taking the highest form of physical and mental exertion and degrading it into a game celebrating mediocrity. This is the type of game proposed by

those who argue against the current culture of the NFL. (Move #2) In the article, “Man Up” by Bryan Phillips, he argues that The warrior mentality and masculinity of the NFL culture needs to adapt to mainstream culture, and I disagree with his assertion.


thesis.

(Move #1 Satire/Mockery) J.J. Watt, one of the hardest hitting monsters of the NFL, approaches his team for a speech. He says, “Today, we are going out there to go for a tie, and apologize for every hit, any type of suffering we cause. We will pray for each opponent, and hug it out after the game.” This idea of a main-stream, high-culture man in football is ludicrous, and mocks the game built by men who sacrificed their entire lives for the name, “NFL.”

(Move #2 Thesis) In the article, “Man Up” by Bryan Phillips, he argues

that The warrior mentality and masculinity of the NFL culture needs to adapt to mainstream culture, and I agree with his assertion.


thesis.

(Move #1 Satire/Mockery) Imagine a man, who had been bullied and persecuted his whole life, entering a football locker room. They confront this man, calling him the “f” word, saying that he is going to hell, and that they would not share the same locker room with him. This type of discrimination should not be justified in any scenario, including NFL culture.

(Move #2 Thesis) The NFL culture of warrior mentality has to adapt to the mainstream culture, or else it risks being an institution of discrimination.

.


thesis.

(Move #1 Satire/Mockery) If the NFL started in the 1800’s, more than half would not be able to play. Jerry Rice, one of the greatest wide receivers in NFL history would have never been able to score 22 touchdowns in a 12 game season, or 122 catches for 1,848 yards at 33 years old. All this wouldn’t have been possible because of his skin color. This form of discrimination was commonly accepted, but at some point, the NFL changed along with the main stream culture and stopped this discrimination. One other aspect of NFL culture also has to change.


.


thesis.

(Move #1 Satire/Mockery) Imagine a professional football player, walking into a daycare center for the first day of volunteering, banging his head against the wall and screaming “Lez go!” The children are crying in terror. This football player then kneels, goes eye-to-eye with the child, and screams, “Man the f*** up!” This type of super-masculine aggression has not place in the mainstream culture.


.

MOVE #3, PARAGRAPH #2!• Introduce quote “move”• Use the following template:

“Phillips first reveals how the NFL can affect a player by______________.”

Move #4 - 6• (Move # 4--Say) “Sometimes the brain goes

sideways, and when that happens, ‘brave’ or ‘cowardly’ shouldn’t even come into it. Seeking help is just the proper thing to do” (Phillips 2).

(Move # 5 --Mean) Phillips explains how brain injuries are not as evident as injuries to the body, such as legs or arms or shoulder.

(Move # 6--Matter) Although a brain injury is a serious matter, the players do not have the diagnosis skills to assess their teammates, nor is it their responsibility to do so. Richie Incognito is not a psychiatrist, and an NFL player wearing a white lab coat and a stethoscope around his neck is not a realistic expectation. In other words, NFL players are athletes, not doctors, and it is not their responsibility to diagnose and treat players that need help. Critics are asking the NFL players to adapt to an impossibility

Move #7 & 8• Transition “move” into paragraph #3• Use the following template:

Not only does Philips explore (Content in quote#1) as evidence for his argument, he also tries to emphasize (Content in quote #2) to prove his point.

Example: “Not only does Philips explore (the effects of the brain) as evidence for his argument, he also tries to emphasize (the conduct of the locker room)to prove his point.

Paragraph #3: Moves 9-11Move 9 (Say): “There were so many tough men in that Dolphins locker room. The unwritten code of football is that you handle your business in-house. Any one of these men could have said something to stop Incognito” (Phillips 3).

Move 10 (Mean) Phillips explains how the other players in the locker room should have stopped the bullying.

Move 11 (Matter) In this case, although the comments by Cognito were severe, the rest of the team thought he was joking, since all of the players went through the same joking. In fact, this joking is the crucial bond between players that support their fellow brothers in the difficult moments of games.

Paragraph #4: Moves 12-13

Conclusion FOR keeping the NFL pure, and the same:

Football is a complex game, both on the field and off the field. Although Bryan Phillips’ argument is supported with clever humor and irony, the traditions and values maintained for decades by men like Jim Brown and Ronnie Lott transcend tawdry jokes about cutting off genitals. (Bring back your introduction into the conclusion). (Then use the pronoun “we” or “us” and connect the main idea to the rest of the world).

Conclusion AGAINST NFL staying the same and requiring change.

Football is a complex game, both on the field and off the field, and that

complexity should match the complexity of an ever-changing society,

which progresses, which displaces the old ways of being for a more fair

and just society. (Bring back your introduction into the conclusion).

(Then use the pronoun “we” or “us” and connect the main idea to the

rest of the world).

Sports Culture “Man up.”. Essay Thesis Question: Does the NFL culture of masculinity and warrior...

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