Social Cognition

How important are first impressions? Do expectations guide behavior? Just how well can we expect to know

our partners?

First Impressions

We start judging people even before we meet them

Preconceptions Stereotypes

Male/Female Beautiful/Plain Young/Old Urban/Country

Primacy Effect – tendency for the first information we receive about others to carry special weight in our impressions of them

Initial judgments influence our interpretations of later information

“Hanna” experiment (Darley & Gross, 1983)

What about face-to-face interactions? Confirmatory Bias – we are more likely to seek

new information about people that confirm what we already think

Participants were asked to find out in the person they were paired with were introverted or extraverted (Snyder, 1981)

Participants asked questions to get the responses they desired (e.g. What do you dislike about loud parties?)

Participants did this even when offered $25 to be as accurate as possible

This leads people to feel overconfident in their beliefs about others

The Power of Perceptions

We often search for the ideal romantic relationship but ultimately end up with something less.

How do we stay satisfied?

Positive Illusions One simply considers his or her partner’s

faults as less significant than others might see them

This carries the risk of disillusionment But if we acknowledge faults and merely interpret

them benevolently, we may more willing to commit to the relationship (Murray, Holmes, & Griffin, 1996b)

Idealized images are associated with greater satisfaction

We may also revise our ideas of the “ideal” partner

Attributions The explanations we give for why

things do or do not happen

internal vs. external global vs. specific stable vs. unstable

Circles 1-full.mov Circles 2-full.mov Circles 3-full.mov

State of the Couple’s Relationship

Attributional Pattern

Partner’s Behavior

Attributions Made

Happy

Unhappy

Relationship Enhancing

Positive

Negative

Internal Stable Global

External Unstable Specific

Distress-Maintaining

Positive

Negative

External Unstable SpecificInternal Stable Global

Actor/Observer Effects We tend to offer different explanations

for our own behavior than we do for our partner’s behavior

Fundamental attribution error – people are aware of the external causes of their own circumstances but make internal attributions about others’ behavior

Self-serving biases People take credit for their successes

while avoiding blame for their failures People expect others to be self-serving but

do not see themselves as such

People usually think arguments are their partner’s faults

People who cheat tend to see their own affairs as less damaging than their partner’s infidelity

Other Relationship Beliefs Romanticism – the belief that love should be

the most important basis for choosing a mate

Individuals who score high on romantic beliefs tend to experience more love, satisfaction, and commitment in their relationships (Sprecher & Metts, 1999)

Many of the questions seem idealistic – positive illusions?

Disadvantageous Beliefs Disagreements are destructive “Mindreading” is essential Partners cannot change Sex should be perfect every time Men and women are different Great relationships just happen

(Epstein & Eidelson, 1981)

Expectations

Self-fulfilling prophecies – false predictions that become true because they lead people to behave in ways that make the erroneous expectations come true

Dave forms an expectancy about Caroline.

Dave acts.Caroline interprets Dave’s behavior.

Caroline responds, usually in reciprocal fashion.

Dave interprets Caroline’s response.

Snyder et al. (1977), U. of Minnesota study

Curtis & Miller, (1986), Liked and disliked strangers

Impression Management We try to control the information others

receive about us

Women will eat less on a date with an attractive man than they would with their girlfriends

Men and women will edit what they say about themselves to appear compatible with attractive members of the opposite sex

e.g. There’s Something About Mary

Four strategies of impression management:

1. ingratiation – we do favors, pay compliments, mention areas of agreement

2. self-promotion – we recount our accomplishments

3. intimidation – portraying oneself as ruthless or dangerous to get others to do our bidding

4. supplication – presenting oneself as inept or infirm to avoid obligations

Impression management in close relationships

We tend to go through less trouble to maintain favorable images for our partners over time

We know they love us, so there is less motivation to win their approval

We also just get lazy – it takes work to manage impressions and we relax among those we know well

How well can we expect to know our partners?

Married partners perceive each other more accurately than dating partners or friends

People who are highly motivated to understand each other perceive each other more accurately

Extraverted and more sociable partners are easier to be accurately perceived than introverted partners

People who are intelligent and open-minded are better judges of others

People may be inaccurate on purpose when faced with threatening information

People may try to change their partners to fit their own perceptions