Saturday 18 January 2014

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Do what you love

YOUR ULTIMATE CAREER& TALENT RESOURCE

SUIT UPSearching for wardrobe tipsfor the corporate world?Take some cues from Suits

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RELENTLESS PURSUITFrom physics to photography,commercial photographer MingThein shares his journey

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PRECIOUS HOURSTime management tips tomake the most out of thelimited time you have

ApplaudyourwillpowerOne powerful way toachieve self-discipline andbuild willpower is toreward yourself.

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ShortcutSShort-changeembrace the value of timeto reach your peakpageS 6-7

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mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 20142

EDITORIALAdviserRoshan ThiRanEditorLiLy Cheah

Assistant EditorevaChRisTodouLou

Contributing EditorPRemaJayaBaLan

Operations Leadhyma PiLLay

Sub EditorLee KaR yean

Layout, Art & DesignTung eng hwaZuLhaimi BahaRuddinahmad fadZuL yusofadZnam saBRi

hafis idZLashanKaRmohd KhaiRuLmuhd hafeeZRaZZiah

Writers & ContributorsCindy yaPJosePh Tanwendy Leesu-ann ChengChong KeaT Lim

ang hui mingCLaudia CadenananCy s.y. sim-LimSales Managerian Lee

If you have any suggestions or feedback on our content, get in touch with the Leaderonomics team at mystarjob@leaderonomics.com.For advertising and advertorials, contact ian.lee@leaderonomics.com - 016 974 7087

LiLy SayS

The opinions expressed in this career guide are those of the writers orthe people they quoted and not necessarily those of Leaderonomics.

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Nothing can be more hurtful tothe service, than the neglect ofdiscipline; for that discipline, morethan numbers, gives one army thesuperiority over another.

GEorGEWaShiNGtoN

WHAT is self-discipline? It’s about actingrationally rather than following your feel-ings at any given time. It is about beingmethodical in the way you do things, andhaving a plan that you follow.

Sometimes, undoubtedly, it’s good to letgo and follow your gut feeling. Many greatachievements have been attained by peoplewho did just that.

However, discipline can help us to a largeextent, especially when we have to takeon long-term projects that are bound tohave their ups and downs and not keep ourenthusiasm to the seventh heaven all thetime.

Building discipline is a process, really. Noone can be disciplined from the outset, andit requires hard decisions and sacrifices attimes.

1 Self-knowledgeAnd the first step to that is self-knowl-

edge. Why? Well, you first have to decide onyour values and goals. What is importantto you? What do you need to do to live life

according to your values and pursue thegoals you have set?

Writing a mission statement may help. Itkeeps you accountable to your values andgoals and makes it easier for you to stick tothe plan.

Self-reflection and introspection are cru-cial, in order to set the foundation, and therationale of having discipline.

2 ConSCiouS awareneSSThe next step would have to be con-

scious awareness. Being aware of what youdo and what you don’t – when you are dis-ciplined and when you are not, is a crucialcomponent of building your discipline.

If you catch yourself being undisciplined– sleeping late, procrastinating, avoidingthe gym, or avoiding tackling a problem atwork, you are one step closer to correctingthe problem.

After all, if you don’t realise you are doingsomething wrong, you will not be able tocorrect it.

Discipline takes time, and eventuallythis awareness will lead you to tackling thesituation before you start doing something“wrong” – like eating that cake or not goingfor a run.

3 CommitmentCommitment to self-discipline is also

another important component. You needto make a commitment, and find a wayto keep yourself accountable to this – forsome, it may mean involving others andsharing your plans with them.

The most effective way, however, is tofind a way to really commit yourself, andmeasure your progress along the way.

Measuring the progress will give youdata that cannot be questioned, and indi-cate how well you are actually doing.

Finally, courage and internal coachingwill ensure you stay sane, and you followthrough – talk to yourself and stay moti-vated, and dare to go the distance. Romewas not built in a day – so be patient, and

you will eventually master the powerof a disciplined you.

BUiLdiNGdiSCipLiNE

oNE StEpat a tiME

Confidencecomes fromdiscipline andtraining.

roBErtKiyoSaKi

It takes tremendousdiscipline to controlthe influence, thepower you have overother people’s lives.

CLiNtEaStWoodQU

otES

:WE’re well into 2014 now. Resolutions and goal-setting aside(I hope our previous two issues helped you to articulate yourgoals), let’s talk about self-discipline.

Self-discipline is defined as “the ability to control one’s feel-ings and overcome one’s weaknesses” and “the ability to pur-sue what one thinks is right despite temptations to abandonit”.

Essentially, it’s about leading your emotions and not lettingthem lead you. Why is it so hard? It’s because our feelings havesuch a loud voice. At times, they offer us necessary signals, suchas fatigue as a sign to slow down.

Other times, in scenarios where we know it’s right andnecessary to push forward, feelings can tell us to back down,retreat in fear, or just be indifferent.

Feelings are horrible advisers, and if we fall into the trap ofonly doing what feels good, we won’t be able to go very far.

Think about some leaders you admire and I’ll venture to sayself-discipline is one characteristic that they work hard on.

They go beyond what is “easy” and “comfortable” in order tomake decisions that command the respect of those they lead.

So while we’re still in the first month of 2014, why not letour pullout this week lead you on a journey of self-reflection.

Consider how self-disciplined you are. Think about how youperceive and use time, and read on for further insights on howto instil the quality of discipline in those you lead.

Embrace the value of self-discipline not only in helping usprogress, but in building our character.

I hope you enjoy the stories we’ve prepared for you thisweek. Let’s approach this new year with the attitude of a learn-er and believe the best is yet to come. Be proactive and committo do what’s necessary for your goals to be reached.

There’s a fantastic Chinese proverb to remind us to get outthere and put our hands to the plough: “The man who waitsfor roast duck to fly into mouth must wait a very, very longtime”.

If you have any feedback, questions or suggestions, pleasewrite to us at mystarjob@leaderonomics.com.

Until next week. Best wishes,

Lily Cheah

to FEEL itdoN’t Wait

By ROSHAN THIRANroshan.thiran@leaderonomics.com

LAST week I read about oneof the secrets of billionaireWarren Buffett’s success. Heclaims his secret is that he“just sits in the office and

reads all day”.In fact, Buffett estimates that about

80% of his working hours are spentreading.

Buffett believes his brilliance is adirect result of reading and once urgedsomeone to “read 500 pages like thisevery day. That’s how knowledgebuilds up, like compound interest.”

As I was sharing this piece ofBuffett’s advice to a few of my friends,they asked me how many books I reada week.

I started thinking about it andanswered “about two to three booksa week.” The next question posed was“how do you find time to read?”

I quickly answered “discipline”. Youjust have to make time and disciplineyourself to do it. But as I further pon-dered I realised that discipline requiredgiving up many things.

Before we start to do something,we need to stop doing somethingelse. If you want to get healthy, it’sa good idea to stop eatingfatty foods before you startexercising.

Discipline is as muchabout stopping as it is aboutdoing. For me, to ensure Iread a few books a week,I needed to stop watchingTV, stop playing computergames and wasting time onunproductive activities.

Discipline is a concepteveryone is aware of, butfew truly understand. Themost successful people inlife exert discipline on a dailybasis.

It is critical to every livingbeing and without it, theworld around us would be indisarray.

Restraint is a big part ofdiscipline. Not giving intosomething you want is asign of strength.

Mental toughnessRight after the 2012

Olympics, I met up withDatuk Lee Chong Wei andPandelela Rinong, the medalwinners from Malaysia atthe London Games.

As they spoke of their jour-ney to greatness, there were constantreferences to sacrifice, hard work anddiscipline.

In fact, the “discipline” they describeis really mental toughness. Mentaltoughness is the key to pushing your-self hard in practice and forcing your-self to go through agonising trainingsessions.

A key component of mental tough-ness is delayed gratification. Delayedgratification is the ability to suspendgain now to gain a bigger and betterreward in the future. This requires sig-nificant willpower.

Ever wonder why your willpowerfails you just when you need it most?

The results of the Marshmallow

tests conducted amongst pre-school-ers more than 40 years ago give ussome insights into the power ofdelayed gratification.

In the late 1960s, researcher WalterMischel tested the willpower of hun-dreds of four-year-olds by placingthem in an empty room with a tastymarshmallow.

They were given an option to eatthe “treat” immediately or wait 15minutes and they would get two spe-cial “treats” instead of one.

Most children said they would waitbut many didn’t even last a few min-utes. The moment the researcher leftthe room, they gobbled their marsh-mallow.

The four-year-olds thatactually managed to last15 minutes and get two

“treats” distracted themselves fromthe treat by focusing on somethingelse.

What was most interesting aboutthe test was the follow-up studiesconducted years later.

They found that the four-year-oldsthat were good at delayed gratifica-tion were much more successful inlife, including having better academicresults with numerous health andbehaviourial benefits.

Discipline requires us to tradetoday’s joy (playing a computer game,having fun with friends, watching TV)in exchange for tomorrow’s victory(being a great leader or an expert ina field). It requires huge willpower to

enable delayed gratification.And this is not only about being

successful in sports. In business, youneed to practise to become a greatleader. You need to learn new skillswhich takes time and significantenergy.

This may mean sacrificing some ofyour “joys” of today for a better youtomorrow. But how do you increaseyour willpower?

IncreasIng yourwIllpower

Researcher and willpower expertRoy Baumeister believes willpowerto be a finite resource. It not a skill tobe learnt but rather a muscle to beworked.

The more you work your willpower“muscle”, the stronger it gets. In 1992,

a British psychologist conductedexperiments on willpower on patientsrecovering from hip or knee replace-ment surgery.

The study found that one simpleelement distinguished patients whorecovered fast and were able to walkagain from the others who took agesto be up on their feet. The difference:A piece of paper.

All the patients were given bookletsto write out their daily recovery plans.Patients who religiously wrote outthese plans started walking twice asfast as the ones who did not.

Having a daily to-do list and ensur-ing you work on your list makes youstay disciplined and focused on yourtask.

Do you have a list of specific itemsyou hope to achieve daily? This is thestarting point of willpower. Disciplineis the bridge between goals andaccomplishment, and instant gratifica-tion derails this bridge.

People lacking control are unable tounderstand the long-term effects oftheir actions, which leads to a weak-ened willpower muscle.

reward yourselfInterestingly, one of the most

powerful forces to enable long-termdiscipline and willpower is to rewardyourself.

Research on the most successfuldieters (folks who actually accomplishtheir weight loss objectives) revealthat many of them were driven byenvisioning the specific reward theywould obtain at the end of their diet– wearing their old, tight clothes back,or a sense of achievement.

We all have cravings and allow-ing them to be rewards for achievingyour goals enables willpower to beenhanced. So, reward yourself eachday if you manage to close out all yourto-do items.

Even a small ice-cream stick (whichI generally crave) may be a greatenough reward to push you forwardto be disciplined and focus to achieveyour goals.

fInal thoughtsJohnny Lewis said that you need

to “be 100% disciplined if you wantto have a good chance of success.Without it, you will never reach greatheights whether in business or sport.”

Are you a disciplined person? Areyou practising delayed gratification inyour life? Are you exercising your will-power muscle?

If you are not, why not start theday with a simple to-do list. It mayjust be the start of a more disciplined,focussed you.

Remember, discipline means thatyou do what is best for you, regardlessof how you feel.

n Roshan Thiran is CEO ofLeaderonomics, a social enterprisepassionate about transforming thenation through leadership and youthdevelopment. He rewarded himselfwith a delicious ice-cream at the com-pletion of this article. There are somegreat videos and articles on leadershipwhich you can enjoy by going to www.leaderonomics.com/articles. To followRoshan on Facebook, go to: www.face-book.com/roshanthiran.leaderonomics

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014 �

DisciplineanD Focus

strengthenYourWillpoWerthroughreWarDs

Discipline is the briDgebetWeen goals anDaccomplishment, anDinstant gratiFicationDerails this briDge.

Olympians like DatukLee Chong Weiunderstand the needfor sacrifice anddiscipline toachievesuccess.

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014�

BE carEful whatYou paY attEntion to

By CINDY YAPmystarjob@leaderonomics.com

THE fable of “the Tortoise and theHare” has been read and re-read tomy six-year-old son with the typicalending being “slow and steady, winsthe race”.

Recently however, my son asked why histeam didn’t win the spoon-and-egg racedespite the lesson being that the hardwork-ing, consistent and steady-paced alwaysemerge champions.

How did the Tortoise triumph over the Haredespite circumstances not being in his favour?It wasn’t the slowness that won him the race.It was diligence, discipline, patience and per-severance to make up for limited physique,lack of skills and speed.

While pondering further why “slow andsteady” may not accurately exemplify the

best approach to attaining our goals, I cameacross a lengthier version of this

age-old tale which offered analternate ending with a wholenew perspective.

Here is the continuation tothe story. Part two takes placeafter the Tortoise’s win. Haredoes some thinking to under-stand why he lost.

He concludes thathe lost because ofseveral things: over-confidence, careless-

ness, complacency,distraction and being

lax.Hare then challenges

Tortoise to another race.This time, Hare runs relent-lessly without stopping from

start to finish andwins.

The moral ofpart two is “Being

slow and steadyis good, but being fast,skillful and consistent is

better”.

The story doesn’t end there. In part three,Tortoise realises there is no way he can beatHare with Hare’s superior form. He racks hisbrains for a solution and suggests a rematchon a different route.

Hare takes off and runs consistently at topspeed, until he comes to a river between himand the finishing line.

While Hare wonders what to do, Tortoiselabours on, swims to the opposite bank, contin-ues trundling and finishes the race victoriously.

The moral of part three is: “Identify yourcore competency; then change the playingfield to suit your core competency”.

TEAMWORK AND HARNESSINGCORE COMPETENCIES

This adaptation of the timeless classicdoesn’t end there. By now, Hare and Tortoisehave become good friends. They have devel-oped mutual respect for each other and rec-ognise each other’s differences and strengths.

Realising the last race could have been runmuch better, both decide to race again, butthis time as a team.

The race starts with Hare carrying Tortoiseto the riverbank. Then, Tortoise takes over andferries Hare across the river.

On the opposite bank, Hare again carriesTortoise. They cross the finishing line togetherin record time, which they could not haveachieved individually.

The real moral of the story? “It’s good to beindividually brilliant and to have strong corecompetencies, but unless you’re able to workin a team and harness each other’s core com-petencies, you’ll always perform below parbecause there will be skills which you lack butare possessed by someone else.”

With these new sequels to the story, wecan derive several key takeaways forachieving success:

l Get up and keep goingAfter their respective failures, both Hare

and Tortoise take the time to reflect on howthey could have done better.

Hare identifies the causes of his downfalland overcomes them to emerge triumphant

in part two, while Tortoise changes his strat-egy and takes on his opponent by utilisinghis ability to swim in part three.

Both have one similar key trait: Theynever gave up in their pursuit for success.

Successful people do stumble, but theypick themselves up and move forward. Theylearn from adversity and through trial anderror.

l Competition is not always between youand someone else

You have no control over what others aredoing and you may even not know theirstrength.

However, concentrating on maximisingyour own strengths to run your own race tothe best of your abilities is something youcan control.

Always question how you can do betterthan the last time, just like both the Hareand Tortoise did.

l Arrogance vs confidenceIn part one, Hare displays cockiness and

confidence, which causes his defeat. There’sa fine line between these two traits.

If you come across as arrogant instead ofpolished and self-confident, transform yourarrogance into self-confidence.

Get involved in tasks which require teaminput. Commit your time to accomplish-ing goals rather than boasting about yourachievements.

l TeamworkAt times, it’s necessary to sit back as a

supportive team member and let anotherperson with the relevant core competencytake the lead.

It is all about situational leadership andletting that person lead in order for theteam to advance further.

Learn to collaborate with those who pos-sess traits that we do not in order to achievegreater things collectively.

As quoted by professional basketballplayer, Michael Jordan – “Talent wins games,but teamwork and intelligence wins cham-pionships.”

By TERRY SMALLmystarjob@leaderonomics.com

RALPH Waldo Emerson was onceasked what people would do if thestars came out only once everythousand years.

He responded, “If the starsshould appear but one night everythousand years, how man wouldmarvel and stare.”

He was right. We would stay upall night watching and wondering.But the stars come out every night,and so we watch television. Brainshabituate.

It’s that time of the year whenlegions of grads are moving outinto “the real world”.

If I was to give them one piece ofadvice, it would be that you don’tneed my advice. You really don’t.

Instead, pay attention to yourattention. Because you becomewhat you pay attention to.

What captures your attentioncontrols your brain, and your life.

David Foster Wallace put it thisway, “Learning how to think reallymeans learning how to exercisesome control over how and what

you think.“It means being conscious and

aware enough to choose what youpay attention to and to choosehow you construct meaning fromexperience.

“Because if you cannot or willnot exercise this kind of choicein adult life, you will be totallyhosed.”

Here is the challenge: Yourattention is so closely connected toyour brain’s wiring that it becomesdifficult to be aware of and to rec-ognise your own pattern of givingattention.

Patterns have been wiring intoyour brain since birth. Change yourattention, change your life. Thissounds difficult, except it’s not. Youcan mindfully wire your brain todo this.

Looking for a place to begin?Start listening to people. Reallylistening. Most people never getlistened to. Listen to understand,not just to respond.

With practice you will find yourbrain becoming more flexible andmore open to new ideas. And thatenriches all of us.

Congratulations,graduates. Go makesomeone else’s lifeextraordinary.

Remember, “When youdo the common thingsin life in an uncommonway, you will com-mand the attention ofthe world.” – GeorgeWashington Carver

Congratulations onlearning something aboutyour brain today. The BrainBulletin is committed to helpto do just that.

Always remember: “Youare a genius!” Enjoy yourbrain.

n Terry Small is a brainexpert who resides inCanada and believes thatanyone can learn how tolearn easier, better, faster,and that learning to learnis the most important skill aperson can acquire. To interactwith Small, email mystarjob@leaderonomics.com

thEtortoiSE

anD thEharE SEquEl

PLAN AHEAD, bE tHE mAstEr of tImE

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014 �

morALE

By EVA CHRISTODOULOUeva.christodoulou@leaderonomics.com

EFFECTIVE time management is oneof those skills that the truly disci-plined people have mastered, andthat the truly effective individualsutilise again and again to achievewondrous results.

It is a skill that can help anyonein any position – from a housewife,to a school student, to the chiefexecutive officer of a multinationalcompany. Yet, so often we don’t putmuch thought into managing andplanning time. Here are some sim-ple steps that can make you moreefficient in managing time and yourdaily activities.

Evaluating your stylETo start off, evaluate your current

strengths in time management.Identify the areas you are doing wellin, and the ones that you need toimprove on.

Try to dig and find the root of the“problem” – Is it a matter of nothaving enough discipline, of notplanning well, or merely of gettingdistracted along the way?

You also should aim to recognisethe effect of your time managementstyle on those around you – at work,but also at home.

toolsThere are various tools that can

help you manage time better. Use atime planner. Be it an electronic or ahard copy one, a time planner allowsyou to write down and record thevarious components of your life.

A good time planner has a masterlist where you enter each task as itcomes up. Once there, you can assess

the task – the hours it needs, itsurgency, and from there you can fit itinto the right time slot.

Planning several months aheadcan also prove to be very effective.The time planner allows you to havereminders and not forget about tasks,and also prioritise the tasks that needimmediate attention from the onesyou can do next week or next month.

Once you have the time plannerin place, you’ll have to come up witha daily “to do” list, which will helpyou keep track of your progress andensure you address all necessarytasks for the day.

Research has shown that the sim-ple task of making a list increasesyour productivity for the day by 25%- giving you two extra hours in aneight-hour workday to tackle moretasks, or pay more attention to theones you already have on your plate.

goodbyEprocrastinator

Making lists and putting every-thing on a planner is only part ofthe story – many of us have beendoing this to some extent, or haveat least started the year doing it.

Somehow, we tend to losemomentum and inefficiency creepsin once again.

Identify the root causes of yourinaction. In addition to that, assesswhether you are stuck in the dead-line-driven trap.

Are you always sprinting betweendeadlines, never allowing yourself abreather? Is this due to your workingstyle, and bad planning, rather thanexternal factors such as, perhapswork overload?

thE art of prioritisingDo you know the difference

between “urgent” and “important”?Urgent means that something

requires immediate attention.Important, on the other hand, has

to do with results. Important matterscontribute to our mission, values,and high priority goals.

Urgent vs important, an idea pop-ularised by Stephen Covey’s book The7 Habits of Highly Effective People, iscaptured in the following diagram:

Covey suggests that effectivepeople spend more time on quad-

rant II. They stay away as muchas possible from quadrants III andIV, as they are neither urgent, norimportant.

Quadrant II, as he puts it, “Dealswith things like building relation-ships, writing a personal missionstatement, long-range planning,exercising, preventive maintenance,preparation – all those things weknow we need to do, but somehow

seldom get around to doing, becausethey aren’t urgent.”

Working With othErsEffective time management

depends, partly, on how you workwith others – Many find teammeetings and team projects highlyunproductive and time consuming.However, if you control the amountof time you spend there, they can

help you immensely.The advantages of working in

a team are obvious – more brainstackling the same issue, more handsto complete it faster. It only takesproper planning and control, really.

Delegation of tasks, according toeach group member’s strengths, canbear favourable results. It might takesome pressure off your shouldersso you can concentrate on a specificpart of the task.

saying “no”Finally, learning to say “no” to

certain tasks may give you more timeto manage the rest of your commit-ments and responsibilities.

Of course, say no to things that areneither urgent, nor important. Don’tsay no when there is a crisis and youare expected to help out.

n The 7 Habits of Highly EffectivePeople by Stephen Covey is distributedby Penguin Books and is available atall leading bookstores. If you and yourpeople feel that you can benefit froma time management course, emailpeople@leaderonomics.com.

By JOSEPH TANmystarjob@leaderonomics.com

TEAM morale is a perennialissue that’s raised regularlywhen I have a conversationwith managers and corpo-rate leaders.

It is almost like an “accepted” dis-ease i.e. – “Yeah, the morale is poorbut what to do? Guess we just have tolive with it.” There is an air of fatalismin the grunt. We know we have it, butwe just have to put up with it.

tEam moralE isnEvEr a tEam issuE

All morale starts and ends with theindividual – in the case of a team, themorale originates and emanates fromthe team leader.

Team members come and go, themood of the members may fluctuatebut the character of the team leadermust be stable and rock-solid.

Without consistEncy,thErE is no basis forlEadErship

So, the one who complains aboutteam morale may very well be the

one who holds the key! Just as poormorale can be contagious, enthusiasmis also contagious but it requires awhole lot more effort – effort thatcannot be expected from followers.

This form of effort is expected onlyfrom leaders. Leaders must always beone notch above their followers whenit comes to morale.

EffEctivE lEadErship isalWays about pErsonalEffEctivEnEss

It’s simple to find out the state of afamily – talk to the parents. It’s simpleto find out the state of a class – talk tothe teacher.

It’s simple to find out the state ofthe team at work – talk to the supervi-sor or the manager. There are threepowerful principles at work when itcomes to improving team morale:

The “One-Up” PrincipleWhen it comes to behavioural

change, we are influenced by ourauthorities. For example, whenever Iconduct character training, inevitablysomeone will ask – “Has my bossattended this training yet?”

Unlike technical training, when it

comes to the matter of characterdevelopment, we are inspired byrole models – especially thosewho are above us.

So, if you expect the team’smorale to improve, then the lead-er’s morale must first be in line.This is the “one-up” principle – theone above must lead the way.

The Principle of PersonalAccountability

We may not be able to initiateworld peace but we certainly canbefriend the person who lives downthe street.

The team’s morale is a cumula-tive “pool” of individuals who takeaccountability for what they can do intheir own “neighbourhood”.

If others do not change and thecompany culture remains the same,well – I can still be accountable for myown “personal culture” i.e. how I carrymyself, the words I speak and the atti-tude I display.

When each individual embracespersonal accountability, then improve-ment in morale becomes a natural by-product. Accountability is the cause,morale is the effect.

The Principle of Clear VisioningWithout a clear vision, the team has

no motivation to exercise self-restraintand self-control.

Human nature is such that, in theabsence of a motivating vision fromthe leaders, the default mode is con-venience, not conviction.

The decline in team morale canoften be traced to a leader who fails tocommunicate clear goals and measur-able objectives.

Communicate, communicate andcommunicate – so far, I have not heardcomplaints about leaders who over-communicate.

On the contrary, complaints are usu-

ally about the lack of communication.As you can see, team morale is not

the real issue. It is symptomatic of thereal cause, which is the lack of per-sonal leadership effectiveness in thearea of personal example, personalaccountability and personal communi-cation. Think about it.

n Joseph Tan is a trainer that aims toequip leaders to achieve consistentresults at work, at home and in lifethrough the development of personalcharacter and the discovery of uniquestrengths. If you are interested inattending one of his courses, email peo-ple@leaderonomics.com

Is NEvEr A tEAm IssuE

Not urgeNt

IIACTIVITIES:Prevention, PC activitiesrelationship buildingrecognising newopportunitiesPlanning, recreation

IVACTIVITIES:trivia, busy workSome mailSome phone callstime wastersPleasant activities

urgeNt

IACTIVITIES:CrisesPressing ProblemsDeadline-drivenProjects

IIIACTIVITIES:Interruptions, Some callsSome mail, Some reportsSome meetingsProximate, pressing mattersPopular activities

IMPo

rtA

Nt

No

tIM

Port

AN

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Source: Stephen Covey’s “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”

By LILY CHEAHlily.cheah@leaderonomics.com

IN the age of diploma mills, fast food andeasy access to information, shortcuts areespecially appealing. We look for waysto get to destinations quicker and favourenvironments where we can progress at a

faster speed.In career and personal development, we can

be in such a rush. This seems to intensify witheach generation.

“I want to be a millionaire by the time I’m50” now seems “too late”, and has shifted 20years forward to “by the time I’m 30”.

Research shows that individuals ofGeneration Y shift jobs more than their pred-ecessors in an effort to progress faster up theladder. In a millenials survey by PwC, 52% ofGeneration Y respondents from around theglobe stated that career progression was theirnumber one priority when looking for anemployer.

But this need for speed isn’t limited toGeneration Ys. No one is spared in today’s worldfrom this craving to get things done faster.

Sometimes, saving time is called “efficiency”,which isn’t a bad thing. But is the route thattake us to a destination in the least amount oftime always the best?

There’s nothing wrong with ambition andcareer progression. However, I do wonder iftoday, we prioritise speed at the expense ofother crucial elements.

Surely, there are things in this world thatonly pure effort and commitment over a pro-longed period of time can achieve.

So at the dawn of 2014, I find myself asking:Do we have an unhealthy relationship withtime? Is fastest always best?

Mistaken in our view of tiMe?I’ve been spending a lot of time with my

97-year-old grandmother recently. She has oneof the healthiest relationships with time thatI know.

She eats, showers and sleeps at set timesof the day. She is constantly early for appoint-ments. She never procrastinates and I’ve neverheard her moan about a task “taking too long”.

She accepts that some tasks take a longertime than others (and that they are taking evenlonger as she ages), but she has never frettedabout that fact. She still puts her head downand does it anyway, even if her vision andphysical strength struggle to keep up.

I’ve been pondering about our differentapproaches to the 24 hours we have daily, and Ihave come to a conclusion.

My grandmother embraces time as alife-long friend and a necessary conduitfor achieving outcomes. She is atpeace with time.

I, on the other hand, tend to seeMr Time as a source of frustrationin what I am trying to achievefrom day to day.

“There is not enough time!”“What? 6pm already?” “Faster!Faster!” “Why are there only 24hours in one day?”

Sound familiar? This may bedue to the culture of our timeand generation. But this is all themore reason to learn how we canimprove the way we see and usetime.

Do you have peace with time? Canyou truly accept the fact that someachievements will take longer than oneyear to accomplish? Perhaps even 30 years?

If you’re a team leader, do you respect thetime demands of every goal, rather than tryingto rush through every single task with time asyour No.1 foe?

Time isn’t our enemy nor is it trying to sabo-tage us. Every task requires time as a partner.We need to give our tasks and journeys thetime they need, without trying all the time totake shortcuts or achieve things faster.

Here are some thoughts to consider abouttime and making things happen too quickly:

It works with people the sameway it works with buildings

We understand the principle when it applies tobuildings. In the huffing and puffing childhoodfable of the three little pigs, the house builtwith straw and sticks had no chance againstthe might of the big bad wolf.

The house made of brick, though it tooklonger to build, had a strong stucture thatcould protect its inhabitants from the wolf. Thetime invested into laying each brick, and thesacrifices made on playtime paid off.

Similarly, when we inspect new buildings,we frown when contractors have cut corners toachieve the final product. More effort, time andexpense would make long-term differences tothe strength and durability of the building.

The principle is the same in our personalgrowth. There are things that require effort andtime, for which there are no shortcuts.

It works the same with those we lead. Thegrowth journey takes time and involves pain.

Just like we shouldn’t cut corners in our ownjourney, we shouldn’t cut corners for those welead. The pain of growing and the essentialityof time are things we should not try to deprivethem of.

It takes time to acquire a wealth ofexperience and build depth

Discussions in the human resources circle haveaccepted the fact that Generation Y individualscrave growth and engagement, and for this rea-son, will move if they no longer feel engaged orfind challenge in what they do.

Whilst true that chasing roles for progressionhas become a norm today, individuals shouldbe wary about being serial job-hoppers.

Several involuntary moves due to companycircumstances may be understandable. Butconstant movement may cause employers todoubt your decision-making and be hesitant toinvest in you, writes Jacquelyn Smith in a 2013Forbes article.

Frequent movement will also deprive you oftruly understanding the nature of a company.

Staying long enough to see projects frombirth stage to completion, and understand theups and downs in a company, will inject depththat constant movement cannot.

The work of Orville and Wilbur Wrightchanged the world, and the Wright brothers

embracedthe need for time toachieve their dreamof building a flyingcontraption that couldcarry human weight.

They knew it wouldtake years of experienceand deep understanding topull off this dream. They didn’tlet the need for time, trial and errorto deter them, and successfully built a plane in1903.

wHat onLY tiMe Can DoHere are four things that needtime to happen:

Character and maturityCharacter and maturity is only deepened

though experience and time. Nelson Mandelawasn’t always the self-controlled man most ofus remember him to be. The 28 years he spentin prison, from 1962 to 1990, moulded him intoa different man.

In Mandela’s Way by Richard Stengel, theyoung Mandela is described by his closestfriend Oliver Tamboas as “passionate, emo-tional, sensitive, quickly stung to bitterness andretaliation by insult and patronage”.

Stengel, who spent three years withMandela to pen the book, prodded Mandela toarticulate how prison had changed him.

“Over and over, though, I used to ask himhow prison had changed him. How was theman who came out in 1990 different from theman who entered in 1962?

“This question annoyed him. He eitherignored it, went straight to a policy answer, ordenied the premise. Finally, one day, he said tome in exasperation, ‘I came out mature’,” writesStengel.

Through the time in prison, Mandela devel-oped a “radar and a deep sympathy for humanfrailty”.

“By maturity, he meant that he learned tocontrol those more youthful impulses, not thathe was no longer stung or hurt or angry.

“It is not that you always know what to door how to do it, it is that you are able to tampdown the emotions and anxieties that get inthe way of seeing the world as it is,” Stengelexplains.

In prison, Mandela learned to adapt hisapproach and control the way he exhibitedemotions. While prison time may have bro-ken the spirit of many men, it strengthenedMandela’s resolve to pursue his purpose: aSouth Africa with equal rights for all.

Time, and the seasons and trials it can bring,is the best teacher of maturity if we embraceits teaching potential.

We may not be in prison like Mandela, buteven in the context of our leadership and

career journeys, time is the best developer ofdepth and maturity.

Finding your nicheIf the name Harland David

Sanders doesn’t ring a bell, then maybeKentucky Fried Chicken does.

Colonel Sanders, as he’s betterknown as, had gone through a host offailed careers before finding his niche.These included being a motel operator,failed political candidate and even an

amateur obstetrician!But by the time he was in his 40s,

Sanders was sure of one thing. Hehad a fantastic fried chicken

recipe. After years of perfect-ing the recipe, in 1952 at

age 62, Colonel Sandersfranchised KentuckyFried Chicken for thefirst time. By the mid1960s, it had expandedto more than 600 loca-tions.

Today, it operatesin more than 15,000

locations throughout theworld.I wonder how many of us

could be like the Colonel andonly find our niches later in life.

We ask a hard question of youngpeople that many adults also find difficult toanswer “What do you want to do with yourlife?”

The Colonel’s example is a good reminderof the value of time in finding what out you’rereally great at. It doesn’t always need to happenin the first five years of your career. We needtime to fail, and we need to fail in order to learn.

CredibilityTime is also needed to build credibility.

Just ask a fresh graduate to teach a group ofCEOs, and you’ll spot this immediately.

While ideas can be generated in an instant,experience requires time, and credibilityrequires experience.

Last year, I met celebrated mountaineer SirChristian Bonington while he was in Malaysia.Best known for leading the first ascent of the12,000 ft south face of Annapurna, Boningtonalso successfully led a British expedition to thefirst ascent of the immense south-west face ofEverest in 1975.

I asked him what leadership lessons he couldshare from his experience in mountaineeringand leading expeditions, and knew I had to lapup every word.

He offered three principles, including makingfirm, clear-cut decisions. Bonington, who hasbeen mountaineering since 1951, spoke withauthority, because these weren’t principles hehad read in a book or heard from friends andcolleagues.

He had experienced everything he wastalking about first-hand, including the conse-quences of bad decisions. Only experience cangive such credibility.

InfluenceTime is also needed to build relationships

of trust, and increase the weight of our influ-ence.

The film Mary Poppins is a classic and well-loved by many. But it took Walt Disney 16 yearsto even convince Pamela Travers, author of thebook Mary Poppins, to agree to make it into afilm.

Disney first made contact with Travers in 1944to pitch the idea to her. She refused. Disney vis-ited her every year until 1960 when she finallybought in to Disney’s vision for the film!

praCtiCaL tipsSo with all this mind, here are two practical tipsto leverage the full benefits of time in our lives:

1 Resist temptation toaccelerate at all cost

There’s a story that’s often used to illustrate theimportance of seasons of struggle.

It’s about a man who finds a cocoon of a but-terfly. Observing a small hole opening up in thecocoon, the man watches the butterfly struggleto squeeze itself out of the hole for hours

Intending to help the butterfly speed up thisprocess, the man takes a pair of scissors andsnips an opening to let the butterfly emerge.

The butterfly comes out easily with a swol-len body and shriveled wings. But as the mancontinues to watch it, its wings remain in thesame condition and are too weak to supportthe body.

In cutting the cocoon open for it, the manhad destroyed the butterfly’s ability to fly. Hedid not realise that the struggle through thatsmall hole was necessary to push the fluid inthe butterfly’s body to its wings.

Just like the butterfly should ideally haveformed spikes to guard itself from being“helped” in this way, we too need to be wearythat others are not cutting our struggles short.

Put yourself in the place of the butterfly.Don’t let anyone deprive you of the necessarygrowth pains you’re going through.

Embrace the season, and leverage the learn-ing potential of this time. Similarly, like theman, don’t rush to provide a shortcut to thenecessary struggles of others.

2 Embrace the learning journeyApproach life again as a learner. We all

know this principle, but as we achieve moreand get caught up with tasks, we tend to forgetthe importance of being a student of life.

Here’s a parable from MaximumPerformance: A Practical Guide to Leading andManaging People at Work by Nick Forste.

Picture a young martial artist kneelingbefore the Master Sensei in a ceremony toreceive a hard-earned black belt.

After years of relentless training, thestudent has finally reached a pinnacle ofachievement in the discipline.

“Before granting the belt, you must passone more test,” says the Sensei.

“I am ready,” responds the student, expect-ing perhaps one final round of sparring.

“You must answer the essential question:What is the true meaning of the black belt?”

“The end of my journey,” says the student.“A well-deserved reward for all my hard work.”

The Sensei waits for more. Clearly, he isnot satisfied. Finally, the Sensei speaks.

“You are not yet ready for the black belt.Return in one year.”

A year later, the student kneels againin front of the Sensei.

“What is the true meaning of theblack belt?” asks the Sensei.

“A symbol of distinction andthe highest achievement in ourart,” says the student.

The Sensei says nothing formany minutes, waiting. Clearly,he is not satisfied.

Finally, he speaks. “You arestill not ready for the blackbelt. Return in one year.”

A year later, the stu-dent kneels once againin front of the Sensei.And again the Sensei asks:“What is the true meaningof the black belt?”

“The black belt representsthe beginning – the start of anever-ending journey of discipline,work, and the pursuit of an ever-higher

standard,” says the student.“Yes. You are now ready to receive the black

belt and begin your work.”Do you approach life like the student in the

first and second instance, or the third?Do you chase achievement after achieve-

ment, or do you step back, see it all as anunending journey of learning and embracetime as a friend in this process?

In an age where we crave speed and instantsolutions, let’s revisit and ingrain in ourselvesagain the importance of time, and the out-comes that only time can bring.

Be friends with time. Enjoy and embraceevery moment and be weary of rushing thoughor running away from necessary seasons ofstruggle and growth pains. There are no short-cuts to building character, maturity, credibilityand influence.

n Lily Cheah is on her own journey to correct herapproach to time and find a balance betweenspeed and efficiency, and not skipping over valu-able experiences along the way. Do you have athought to share on the value of time? You canreach her at lily.cheah@leaderonomics.com

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014� mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014 �

aLL ingoodtimefaster is not

aLways better

Johnny Miller, a Colonel Sandersimpersonator, ouside a Kentucky Fried

Chicken restaurant in Yuma, Ariz. ColonelHarland Sanders franchised KFC for the first

time in 1952, at the age of 62. Since thenKFC has grown to operate in more than

15,000 locations worldwide.

Wilbur Wright, left,and Orville Wrightembraced thechallenge ofbuilding a flyingcontraption thatcould take humanweight. After yearsof trial and error,they successfullydid so in 1903 atKill Devil Hills nearKitty Hawk, NorthCarolina.

Nelson Mandelaspent 28 years in prison, from1962 to 1990. After this time,Mandela says he “came out

mature”. From someonedescribed as “passionate,

emotional, sensitive, quicklystung to bitterness and retaliation

by insult and patronage”, hebecame the self-controlled

man we rememberhim to be.

time isn’t our enemynor is it trying tosabotage us. everytask requires timeas a partner. weneed to give ourtasks and journeysthe time they need,without tryingaLL the time totake shortcutsor achieve thingsfaster.

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014�

PICTURE THISFaIlURE IS nOT THE End OF THE wORld

By PREMA JAYABALANprema.jayabalan@leaderonomics.com

WHEN commercial photogra-pher Ming Thein was askedabout what he consideredto be the biggest failure inhis life, he paused.

He initially wanted to say that it was hisstruggle to be a photographer despite thefailures he faced but, after deep thought, hegave a different answer.

“I don’t think my failure to be a photogra-pher at the initial stages is the case, becauseeach time it did not work out, I learnedsomething and used it in my next attempt.

“And eventually, it did work out. On hind-sight, my biggest failure would probably bemy corporate career because I spent 10 yearsdoing it and in the end, I left. In some ways, Ido feel like it was a waste of time,” he says.

A Malaysian who moved overseas at theyoung age of two, Ming grew up in Australiaand New Zealand. He graduated from Oxfordwith a masters in physics at 16. He thenwent into chartered accountancy.

“However, I have always been armed witha camera since I was 16. Photography isbeyond a job for me – it’s a passion.

“Actually, until early 2012, it was a full-time passion and a part time job; I’ve shotcommercial assignments on and off for thelast eight years, but I went full time justrecently,” he says.

The corporaTe worldUpon completing his education, Ming

worked in the UK, scoring his first job atKPMG in London.

“I was an audit trainee and was han-dling the usual routines such as charteredaccountancy, client work and audits – I hatedthe job as it was the most boring thing I’veever done,” he shares.

Then, in 2005, Ming was headhunted bythe Boston Consultancy group to join theKuala Lumpur office of KPMG CharteredAccountancy Audit.

Ming had never felt at home in Londonand came back to Malaysia every year to visithis extended family.

Kuala Lumpur felt quite like home sowhen the offer came, he decided to give it ago. That was nine years ago and he has beenhere since.

The clicking journey“That’s half the story. The other half of thestory is that I’ve been photographing part-time since 2003.

“I’ve been taking assignments on and offfor the last eight years. After KPMG, I waseditor of Click magazine for five years. I triedto be a full-time professional photographerthree times before this.

“The first time was in 2005 and I think Iwasn’t really sure what I was doing at thattime. The second time around was in 2007.”

Ming took a sabbatical for three months.The third time, he thought he had it nailed.It was 2009 when his wife was in Londoncompleting her Masters. Ming followed herfor a few months thinking he had it all fig-ured out.

“I’m going to be a specialist at one thing,which is photojournalism. I am going to do alot of cold-calling and knocking on doors andeverything to try to get opportunities,” hetold himself.

“And guess what, the whole time that Iwas in London I think I made £300 from pho-tography which was not worth it. You can’t

live off that but of course photojournalism isanother dying breed, with the proliferation ofpeople having iPhones and the social media,there’s no demand for it anymore; it doesn’tpay.

“Well, that was round three. My finalattempt at photography yet again was lastyear and now here we are, 12 months on, sofar so good,” he explains of his interesting,long-winding journey.

The vocaTionMing is a commercial photographer spe-

cialising in product photography on locationand corporate reportage.

He is also a creative consultant and direc-tor who ensures consistent visual look andfeel across all aspects of a campaign, includ-ing videos/commercials, printed materials,exhibitions and lighting design.

For Ming, it’s not just about the visuals: it’sabout the experience and emotions as well.

He boasts an extensive and diverse inter-national client base that includes Nissan,Jaeger Le-Coultre, Van Cleef & Arpels, Maitresdu Temps, Richemont, the Swatch Group,Hijjas Kasturi Architects, Tange AssociatesArchitects, Sunway Group, Maybank, Eastern& Oriental, the Boston Consulting group,several Michelin star chefs including FergusHenderson and Bruno Menard, The City ofLondon and Moon Travel Guides.

lessons learnT in lifeAlthough Ming regrets wasting precious

time in the corporate world, he feels that itis a blessing in disguise as it exposed him tomany experiences.

“I feel that, if I had not spent that time inthe corporate world, I would not have theexperience, I would not have the networkand I would not have a lot of friends.

“I wouldn’t have the ability to deal withclients at a very senior level. Generally, I’mdealing with directors or CEOs, thus my pre-vious experiences come in handy when I amliaising with them,” says the go-getter.

For Ming, the two things that separatefailure from success is popular perception. Hebelieves that you must always be happy withwhat you are doing and the outcome of yourdecision, without the influence of people’sperceptions towards your venture.

If you’re not happy with the outcome ofyour venture, even if you’ve made yourself amillionaire out of it, it won’t work.

“If you try to do something 99 times andyou die without achieving it, people aregoing to call you a failure.

“However, if you try 99 times and yousucceed on the 100th try, everybody’s goingto say that’s dedication. Bear that in mind.Society is very two-faced about this. You onlygive up when you decide you’ve had enough,not when people tell you that you’vehad enough.”

sTaying sTrongand posiTive

It was his love for photographythat urged Ming to keep goingdespite his earlier failed attemptsat it. For Ming, it is all about con-fidence and faith in one’s self.

“You have to give your bestwhen you do something. Ofcourse, your ego takes a blowand you feel depressed when itfails but you have to pick your-self up and go on.

Sometimes, you have nochoice but to just go on and

eventually, you find a way to make itwork. When things got difficult for me,I say, ok, I have no plan B, so I’ve got tomake this work and that I believe, ledme to my success today.”

However, Ming says that it is not justthe not-giving-up attitude that spansone’s success. It should be accompaniedwith commitment and responsibility aswell.

He adds that one should not be shy toask questions when unsure about things.Asking questions will help increase knowl-edge and get you nearer to your dreams.

IF yOU TRy TO dO SOmETHIng99 TImES and yOU dIEwITHOUT aCHIEvIng IT,PEOPlE aRE gOIng TO CallyOU a FaIlURE. HOwEvER,IF yOU TRy 99 TImES andyOU SUCCEEd On THE100TH TRy, EvERybOdy’SgOIng TO Say THaT’SdEdICaTIOn.

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014 �

WARDROBE

Louis LittAnother great supporting actoris Louis Litt, a junior partner atPearson Hardman. Litt is a talentedlawyer, a highly dedicated workerwith strong work ethics. Powerhungry, he is also bitterly jealous ofSpecter’s success.

Beneath his well-cut suit, Litt isoverweight, perhaps to project aslightly clumsy demeanour and hishunger for attention.

He wears a scorn on his face andhis beady eyes are always suspiciousof everyone around. With a recedinghairline, crew cut hair and sportingthick eyebrows, Litt plays his role toperfection.

What Litt wears:Tailored-made suits that are well-fit-ted to his large frame. His spread col-lar shirts are always with an expen-sive looking tie, knotted to perfectionwith a dimple in the middle.

Jessica Pearson:And for you corporate ladies, lookout for Jessica Pearson. Pearson isSpecter’s boss, a talented big shotlawyer whom you do not want tocross. She proves that woman canmake it to the top and look amazingwhile doing it.

What Pearson wears:l Corporate jackets but with added

accessories to give it a femininetwist.

l Structured dresses which are usu-ally knee-length but with interest-ing necklines.

l Separates that are medium con-trasts in colours.

I guess this aids in the develop-ment of Pearson’s character as well.

She appears to be cold – hencethe all structured, corporate suits;yet deep down she has a soft side inher, evident in her addition of state-ment necklaces and soft shawls inher outfits.

Clothes aside, Pearson’s facial fea-tures – deep, piercing eyes, lusciouslips, her upright posture and tall phy-sique gives her the extra edge to lookcommanding and powerful.

Donna PauLsen:And let’s not forget Donna Paulsen,one of my personal favourites.Paulsen is the executive assistant toSpecter, someone you want to hugand strangle at the same time.

Smart, witty and at times eccen-tric, Paulsen is one unique personthat Specter can’t function without.

Unlike Pearson who is always cooland composed, Paulsen is one dramaqueen who will cry crocodile tears toget her way.

What Paulsen wears:l Outfits that shape the contour of

her body.l Soft dresses that are at times sleeve-

less or with plunging necklines.

Her wardrobe choices however,may not always be the most office-appropriate. But you see here howPaulsen always uses her body move-ments, and how Suits’ stylists cleverlyuse body hugging dresses for Paulsento portray her feminine charm.

However, I’d like to put in a word ofcaution here – Suits is make-believe.We live in the real world. With body

hugging and revealing clothing, peo-ple may misconstrue the messageyou are sending. So, unless you havered hair and know every secret in yourcompany, don’t do a Paulsen.

Suits is now in its fourth season.Even if you don’t adorn a jacket or anysuit for that matter to work, watch it.

Apart from lessons in wardrobemanagement, Suits has witty dia-logues, interesting characters and agood storyline.

Enough reasons for you to spend alazy afternoon with. Or you can justtune in and watch how Specter struts.Definitely worth your while.

n Wendy Lee is the presidentof Malaysian Associationof Brand and ImageConsultants and a directorat BrandImage InternationalInstitute. She is a firm believ-er that with style, there mustbe substance!

SUITSLESSONS FROM

By WENDY LEEmystarjob@leaderonomics.com

Icaught my goddaughter engrossed on her Mac oneafternoon. With her headphones firmly secured over herhead, and a silly grin on her face, it would have taken hera full hour before she’d realised I had passed out on thecouch.

“Who’s the hero?” I asked. “Harvey Specter,” said she, smil-ing. Harvey Specter. Interesting name. Curious, I clicked onthe pilot episode. Bad move. In 10 minutes, I was hooked.

For the next two weeks, Suits seasons one to three becamemy daily staple. I have always had this “thing” for lawyers.(My first internship job was at Lim Kean Siew, one of Penang’stop law firms.) Heavily influenced by Paper Chase and LA Lawprobably.

With Suits, what captivates me, apart from the interestingplot, intriguing characters, and of course Specter himself, isthe way the TV series cleverly crafts each character by wayof wardrobe selections. Try watching the show without anysound. Before long, I bet you can tell who’s the boss and

who’s not.Suits is one show that I’d strongly recommend every cor-

porate executive to watch. Here’s why. It teaches you how todifferentiate between ranks by looking at what they wear.

It also shows you how the way the characters style theirhair, wear their clothes and choose their accessories to sup-port and emphasise the personalities that they are portray-ing. For those who work in the professional sector, take a fewcues from the characters from Suits.

Suits is about a successful lawyer Specter who hires ayoung man, Mike Ross as his associate in one of New York’stop law firms, Pearson Hardman.

Ross, with a photographic memory, has passed the bar buthas not actually attended law school. The series focuses onSpecter and Ross as they try cases for the firm while main-taining Ross’ secret.

Now, to create a master-protégé differentiation betweenthe two, the show’s wardrobe stylists cleverly use details intheir everyday wear. While both characters look smart andprofessional in their well-fitting suits, the details of theirlooks convey very different messages.

What sPecter Wears:Three-piece suit with peak lapels,often in navy pinstripes, spread col-lar shirts with a Windsor-knotted tie.Specter is the top closer of his firm,and his power suits convey his sta-tus at his firm perfectly. Everythingin Specter’s look evokes strength.

What ross Wears:Button down shirt, slim tie, no vest, a moreunderstated suit with a slim notch lapel.This is no doubt a common fashion state-ment, as I see it happening very commonlywith our young Malaysian graduates. But itdoesn’t really showcase success. Ross alsoslings a messenger bag and commutes towork on his bicycle.

To further emphasise the importance ofone’s appearance in the corporate world,in one scene, Specter comments to Ross,“Get your skinny tie out of my face and getto work.”

And in another, we see Ross frustrat-ingly ask, “What does it matter how muchI spend on suits?” to which Specter retorts,“People respond to how you dress, so like itor not, this is what you have to do.” Specterthen sends Ross to his tailor to look morelike the part of the Harvard graduate enroute to becoming a partner at a New Yorklaw firm.

(From left) Jessica Pearson (Gina Torres), Louis Litt (Rick Hoffman), Rachel Zane (Meghan Markle), Harvey Specter (GabrielMacht) and Mike Ross (Patrick J. Adams) looking sharp in Suits.

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 201410

By SU-ANN CHENGmystarjob@leaderonomics.com

THE age-old debate remains;are leaders born or made? Ofcourse, every parent wishes forhis/her child to bear leadershipqualities, as they are important

traits to possess and are contributorstowards career success in many fields.

But perhaps the better question to askwould be, “How do we ensure our chil-dren become great leaders anyway?”

Renowned American scholars Robertand Pauline Sears, who specialised inchild psychology in the 1970s, believedthat personal traits such as the abilityto understand or deal with others, theneed for achievement, confidence andassertiveness are influenced by childhoodexperiences, adding that parent supportplayed an important role in leadershipdevelopment in children.

Leadership skills are a combinationof many characteristics that mould anindividual, but self-discipline could pos-sibly be the most crucial. In the words offormer US President Harry S Truman; “Inreading the lives of great men, I foundthat the first victory they won was overthemselves; self-discipline came first”.

Teaching children the concept of self-discipline from an early age lays thefoundation for them to master other vitalleadership attributes including patience,persistence and focus.

It also equips them with skills to solveproblems more effectively, foster andmaintain positive relationships as well asaddress life’s challenges with maturity.

The arT of self-disciplineThe term “self-discipline” is thrown

around a lot and appears in various forms.Simply put, its very definition is the abilityto make oneself do things that should bedone in spite of inconveniences or hard-ships.

In other words, it is about havingself-control or self-regulation to avoidnegative consequences or for the sake ofimprovement.

Actor Michael J Fox summed it up as“doing something the right way whetheranyone’s watching or not”.

Self-discipline is the art of doing some-thing that one may not necessarily wantto do. Nevertheless, he knows it needsto be done for a long-term benefit andon top of that, is able to deny certain

impulses or diversions that may throwhim off-track. Children, by nature, areimpulsive and part of the solution is tolearn self-discipline.

It is important to note that in order forparents to instil self-discipline in a child,it does not necessarily mean imposingverbal or physical punishment.

To discipline, in essence, means toteach. It is about showing children theright behaviour, setting limits, enforcinghabits and helping them tolerate unfa-vourable outcomes when necessary – allthis without breaking their emotionalstate of mind.

Instead of opting for punishment,which often focuses on what the child hasdone wrong, parents should practise posi-tive discipline.

The latter works on the principle thatchildren learn better when they under-stand the connection between their deci-sions, actions and consequences.

Punishment may correct a child’sbehaviour, but more often than not, onlybecause they fear the penalty itself.

Discipline is not meant to humiliate,belittle or cause pain, but to teach appro-priate behaviour and to establish the factthat for every action, there is a conse-quence (theAsianparent.com).

sTarT Them youngMany parents struggle to determine

when discipline begins. However, forthose who understand positive parentingand are aware of the fact that it is notabout punishment but about teachingand guidance, it can start as early asinfancy stages.

Of course, a baby “misbehaving”would not be intentional, but “settinglimits is a critical part of a responsibilityas a parent”, says Claire Lerner, directorof parenting resources at Zero to Three inWashington.

A study in New Zealand tracked agroup of people born in 1972 and 1973until the age of 32 and evaluated theirlevel of self-control – such as conscien-tious, self-discipline and perseverance– at various ages (Proceedings of theNational Academy of Science, 2011).

They found that children who strug-gled with self-control as pre-schoolerswere three times more likely to have dif-ficulties as young adults.

On the other hand, children who dem-onstrated more self-control were morelikely to have fewer health and financial

problems when they reached their 30s.A classic study by Stanford psycholo-

gist Walter Mischel, referred to as theStanford marshmallow experiment in thelate 1960s, focused on delayed gratifica-tion children as young as four.

Each was given a choice between onemarshmallow immediately or waiting 15minutes to get two.

In follow-up studies, it was discoveredthat children who were able to wait long-er tended to have better life outcomes, asmeasured by their SAT scores as well aseducational attainment and body massindex.

In another recent Swedish study,researchers found that patient childrengenerally have brighter futures (TheLocal, Oct 2013).

Quite similar to the marshmallow test,grade six children who picked a 1,000kronor-payout in five years’ time do bet-ter later in life than their peers who choseone-10th of that sum straight away.

The study followed the children’sdevelopment over four decades andshowed a clear correlation between achild’s level of patience and how wellthey performed academically.

These experiments demonstrate thatchildren who develop self-discipline andpatience early on are more likely to bemotivated in school and eventually, intheir careers.

The ability to wait, as highlighted innumerous studies, teaches self-discipline.They clearly demonstrate the ability tothink before they act, weigh out optionscarefully and understand potential con-sequences.

In a career setting, children equippedwith self-discipline will then tend to fallinto leadership roles with more ease.

With work, they would be able to focuson goals, channel effort into their jobsand even more likely to show up for workon time.

In terms of social skills, the ability tothink before reacting helps them act lessimpulsively, more diplomatically andresolve conflict peacefully and effectively.

developing self-disciplineChildren, typically, find it harder to

grasp concepts with verbal explanations.Experience is a much better teacher thanmere words and this is where parentsplay an essential role. Nurture and posi-tive modelling are significant influencesin shaping a child’s self-discipline.

Most parenting guides also assert thatthe best way to teach children such vitalskills is to exhibit them first themselves.

In many ways, the family setting isnot very different from that of a workenvironment. There is so much potentialfor children to adopt many qualities athome, which will eventually groom themto be successful leaders.

Starting with self-discipline, parentscan purposefully teach children - of anyage - its value. Here’s how:

l Set solid limitsChildren are constantly exploring andthat is not a bad thing. But children alsoneed boundaries and parents need tosend a clear message on this. Often, par-ents cave in when children throw fits andoften lose the battle.

That would be one of the biggestmistakes as children will soon learn tomanipulate limits, only to find that therules of the grown-up world may notbe as easy to deflect.

l Link decisions with implicationsParents should take time and explain tochildren the consequences of decisionsand actions. Also, ask pointed ques-tions to give children the opportunityto analyse the situation and learn tocome up with a favourable outcome foreveryone.

Reward them when they display pos-itive attitudes and at the same time,point out firmly why bad behaviour isnot to be tolerated.

l Get children engagedEncourage children to get involved in avariety of activities that will create ave-nues for them to develop self-discipline.

This includes engaging them in certainfamily decisions as well as interactionswith peers like sports, games and classes.

Good communication is also closelyrelated to self-discipline as it teaches chil-dren to be aware of how their decisionsmay affect others.

l Be consistent andset a good exampleThe very core of self-discipline requiresreinforcement, as do all learning proc-esses. Give children the opportunity topractise the right behaviour in differentsituations.

Above all, realise that all children lookto their parents to teach them. As thesaying goes, “children are great imitators,so give them something great to imitate”.

any child couldbe a greaT leader

Without self-discipline or patience,children risk moving into adulthoodwithout emotional maturity and tend toresort to childish behaviours like sulking,whining and throwing tantrums to influ-ence others.

Such negative, destructive approacheswill not likely establish a sense of respector esteem, let alone help them accom-plish goals effectively.

It is imperative that parents are invest-ed in developing self-discipline in theirchildren. Consistency is key in nurturingand cultivating this tremendous assetfrom young, in addition to guidance, loveand encouragement.

Whether or not a child becomes aformal leader in the conventional sense,leadership qualities give every child ahead start in life. In order to take chargeof their own lives, self-discipline is theright place to start.

SELF-DISCIPLINECOMES FIRST IN LEADERSHIP

IN ACAREER

SETTINg,CHILDRENEquIPPED

wITH SELF-DISCIPLINEwILL THEN

TEND TOFALL INTO

LEADERSHIPROLES wITHMORE EASE.

mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 2014 11

stay calm and bE patIEnt

WHat Is dIscIplInE?By CHONG KEAT LIMkeatlim.chong@leaderonomics.com

MY parents used to enforce disciplineon me when I misbehaved as a kid.Against my will, of course.

During school days the most fearedperson title seemed to always fall onthe guru disiplin, further feeding mydislike for the word discipline.

For me, discipline was almostalways associated with fitting into amould, a flattening of spontaneity, ajoy-killer.

Over time, however, I learnedthat the word actually has a broadermeaning that encompasses a senseof focus and purpose, much to mysurprise.

I loved sports and was very activein athletics, and these two past-timepassions sparked the beginning of mylove-hate relationship with discipline.

A few exceptions aside, such asrhythmic gymnastics which show-cases artistic performance throughgrace of movement, it was never hardfor me to pick up a new sport and soit was always easy going at the initialstage.

Then I’d hit a plateau and veryquickly I’d be bored. I would start toshow up late for practice and evenskip a few when the weather was onmy side.

Possibly speaking from personalexperience, my sprint coach wouldgive me a lecture which he skilfullymasked in the form of rhetorical

questions: “You want to run or justplan to fill up the starting blocks? Youwant to win or waste my time?”

Sometimes the rebel in me wantedto tell him that he could choose tostop coaching me, but eventually thecoward in me would win and I’d hangmy head and promise to show up forthe next training practice.

And herein lies the stark differ-ence in perspective: the person whounderstands discipline welcomes it inexpressions of commitment, dedica-tion and excellence, compared wtihthe other who sees it as an inconven-ient burden to be endured.

It wasn’t until later that I finallycame to understand the value oforder and control in competitivesports, and impress upon myself thatnatural ability and interest can onlytake one so far in any field, but withdiscipline, it can bring about a changein ineffective habits and practices,and more importantly enjoyment inthe pursuit.

Of course, knowing is merely thefirst step. Then there’s the applying ofthe knowledge.

As a friend would retort: Abuden,Sherlock. As with other matters in lifethat are comparable to a smartphone,converting the user app into systemapp is where the challenge lies.

Experts recommend takingbaby steps. Zen Habits blogger LeoBabautu advises cultivation of self-discipline in starting small with asimple but unbreakable promise to

yourself to do one small thing everysingle day.

Maybe the practice of disciplinealso incorporates mindfulness here.

So I ask myself where am I heading,what do I hope to achieve and arriveat, at the end of the day.

Or better – what kind of person Iam becoming and hope to become inorder to contribute to the well-beingof the communities which I am amember? And I wonder what thiswould mean for me and us.

Could it be starting the day withbreakfast, using the car indicator sig-nals, greeting our colleagues at work,performing our prayer obligations,doing a random act of kindness forour neighbours, having a meaning-ful chat with our spouse or childrenbefore we retire to bed at night? Iwonder.

A friend once reminded me thatworking on something every day isakin to working a field.

One doesn’t get to see its imme-diate rewards but if we work withconsistency and a sense of purpose,over time we will get to enjoy thefruit of our labour – provided theweather conditions are also good, ifnot accommodating throughout.

However, if I miss a week of work, Imay put the crops at risk.

In short, one word. Discipline.And now I shall let the word lead

us to two other questions for our con-sideration: what is my field to ploughand am I ploughing it?

By HYMA PILLAYhyma.pillay@leaderonomics.com

ONCE upon a time, a king made anannouncement that anyone whowanted the post of a personalassistant must meet him. Manypeople gathered at the palace.

The king led them to a pond and said, “Theone who can fill water from the pond intothis bucket will be chosen for the post. Butremember, there is a hole in the bucket.”

Some people left without trying at all, afterhearing the last statement. Some gave it ashot once and then said, “The king has alreadychosen someone else. Let’s go.”

But one man kept filling the bucket withwater patiently. He filled the water in thebucket from the pond and came to dry land.

However, within a few minutes, the waterleaked. He kept doing this for a long time tilleventually, the pond became dry. The manfound a diamond ring at the bottom of thepond and he gave it to the king. The king said,“This ring is a reward for your patience andhard work. You are fit for the job.”

This was a story I remembered from mychildhood days. Back then, patience seemedlike such an easy word.

It was so much easier to tell ourselves to bepatient and persevere through “hard times”(our problems back then largely revolve aroundnot being able to watch TV on school days).

These days, most of us are often expectedto fill hole-ridden buckets, and it can get veryfrustrating. It is always easier to be the majorityin that story, and walk away from what wedeem to be impossible and a waste of our timeand energy.

So how do we persevere through frustratingtimes? One way is by looking at the big picture.Here are three tips to help you focus.

It pays topErsEvErE

RemembeR thatthings take timeTake a moment. Think about yourmost fulfilling moments, likeachieving a goal you set for yourself.The best outcomes we get are oftenthose where we carefully and patient-ly work towards. It takes dedicationand time to get things done properly.It is very easy to give up on goals,dreams and achievements when weare impatient.

RemembeRwhat matteRsRemember that reaching the end ofthe road always feels better if thejourney is amazing. Being impatientdoes not give you an amazing journey.It gives you stress that makes youlook unpleasant (yes it really does).Keep your focus on the things thatmatter and you will find it easier tokeep your patience.

RemembeR to stayRelaxed and keep apositive mindsetWhen you are feeling agitated andimpatient, just stop what you aredoing for a moment. Close your eyes,take in deep, slow breaths to help yourelax. When you are in this position,think about the positive things youhave in life. We usually get impatientwhen things seem to be going wrong.Focus on the good things about thesituation you are in now. For example,late for class? Well, good thing youhave a mobile phone to inform themthat you are going to be late. Thereis almost always something good topick up from every bad situation.Let us all strive to become like theman in the story, don’t let holes inbuckets hinder us from the greatthings life has in store for us. Patiencealways pays off.

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2

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mystarjob.com, saturday 18 January 201412

Breakingtradition canbe beneficial for yourcompany

Are you anobstacle toyourself? How do youovercome this?

If you have any suggestions or feedback on our content, get in touch with the Leaderonomics team at mystarjob@leaderonomics.com.For advertising and advertorials, contact ian.lee@leaderonomics.com - 016 974 7087

How Googlemade it bigin the Internet worldwithin a short duration

Also next week

Conqueryour giantsby leveraging on yourstrengths

WE’re launching a new column called HR Talk. Each week, wefocus on a HR-related topic, and gather a few HR experts to sharetheir opinions on it. If you have suggestions for HR-related top-ics that you’d like to see us cover, drop us an email at mystarjob@leaderonomics.com. We would love to hear from you.For fans of Dear Careernomers, fear not, we will continue answeringyour career questions every first Saturday of the month.

What is your take on the recentdeath of indonesian copyWriterMita diran after Working for 30consecutive hours?

Ang Hui Ming,Co-founder and human resource director,Leaderonomics.

Working 30 hours (or more) straight? Been there, done that.Advisable? Looking back, no. Needed at that point in time?Yes. A man’s word is his promise and I prided myself in beingable to meet deadlines and to prove my worth especiallywhen starting out in my career.

On hindsight, would I have done it again? Unfortunately,yes. But it’s a conscious choice, which is the case also for thelate Mita Diran. My deepest condolences to the family ofMita. Mita’s unfortunate passing has opened up again withmore heat, the discussion of “working late”, “overworking”and “worklife balance”; especially here in Asia!

Let’s look at it from the employee’s, leader’s and theemployer’s perspective:

EMployEEs:The choice is in your hands.The choice:l To go into the industry knowing the work culture, hours

needed, expectations and “norms”.l To “meet expectations” or not for your career advance-

ment.l To “stand on your principles” or to comply to the company’s

way of life.l To “know your body” and how much it can take, when to

stop and recharge. No one can really predict how the bodyreacts when tired and the chemical reactions with differentintakes or energy drinks or “supplements” to keep alert. So,be discerning.Let’s get real, there are some people who thrive on the

adrenaline of the last minute rush and push to deliver a greatend result.

Working long hours is really a personal choice. No com-pany or manager can force you if you decide not to give in. Intoday’s borderless world, many have chosen the path of being“on their own” (ie. freelancing, being an entrepreneur etc)where they have total work life control.

Having said the above, unfortunately, some have lesschoice if this is the only job they are hanging on to for dearlife (family sustenance).

lEAdErs:Watch out for your people. As much as a leader’s role is to“challenge” their people, it is also a big part of it to “protect”their people. Sometimes your people may make choices thatare unwise, and it is your role as trusted leader and mentor toadvise and guide them.

The customer is King. We all are familiar with that term.But customers are people too, and they can be influenced,convinced, persuaded (well, most of them).

Know your people, their limits and don’t live to regret yourdecisions. Force your people to take breaks/leave. A well-rested talent is always more productive!

EMployErs:Understand your industry and nature of work. Seek ways tocontinuously improve the working conditions for the welfareof your greatest assets - your people.

Your image and ability to attract talent lies also in your abil-ity to care for the welfare of your people.

Resource adequately - a task easier said than done. Keeptrying.

ClAudiA CAdEnADirector, strategic human capital managementPresident and group CEO’s officeSapuraKencana

What can be the reason for someone having to spend 30 uninter-rupted hours working? I can see the following:

1 There was no appropriate assignment and resource planning,which required her to put excessive effort in a compressed

amount of time.

2 She did not manage her time well and was forced to put thehours at the last minute to meet pre-established datelines.

3 She willingly decided to take a personal challenge to find outhow long she could work without a break.

Without prejudging her situation, her web postings did not showshe was distressed, angered or disturbed by the amount of time shewas spending at work.

Whichever the reason, and irrespective of what was the ultimatecause of her death, it brings up a variety of questions that should bediscussed:

1 Are working demands “forcing” people to work harder to copewith these demands, making it more difficult to achieve a bal-

anced life?

2 Should organisations monitor how much time employees arespending at work, giving that we now operate in a much more

virtual environment?

3 Do employees feel that they have a choice to say “no” to exces-sive corporate demands?

There is no doubt that for most of us, work is an integral part of lifeand we will spend a significant amount of our life at work.

However, it is our own personal responsibility to ensure we areable to achieve the so much talked about “balance”.

And this word is a relative term. Irrespective of how that balancelooks like for different people, what is important is to recognise andadvocate the need for balance.

Nobody will ever be productive/effective/ his or her best if thereis no shift in activities. We need to eat, exercise, spend time withour family, interact with others as all of this will make us betterindividuals and provide us with the energy that is needed to beproductive.

Let’s always remember, that it is our choice how we live our lives,and if we choose to work for 30 hours without rest, we will need tounderstand the consequences of our actions and take accountabil-ity for them. No amount of corporate surveillance or regulation willultimately protect the employee’s well-being. It is in our own hands.

So, let’s stop acting like super-heroes, and ensure we think aboutthe consequences of our actions for us, those around us, and thecorporations for which we work.

dAtin nAnCy s.y. siM-liM,Senior vice-president and headof human capital,Great Eastern Life Assurance (M) Bhd

With the advent of social media, many issues relatedto job stress have been discussed openly. The pluspoints are that employees now know who they wantto work for and they can tap social media networksto find out about work cultures.

The downside of this is that everyone has a viewand a lot of noise is created. Upon my last check,Mita’s case has generated close to 700,000 plus mes-sage threads on Google.

My take on her case is – working long hours is notpeculiar to the advertising sector but it is a sectorthat has been known for it. There are many otherbusinesses that are known for pushing for longhours. It’s the nature of the business.

There are a few ways of achieving work-life balanceon the personal front:l Self-management: many of us have the option of

being more productive at the workplace. Reducebreakfast and lunch breaks, and also push forshorter meetings so that there are more hours tocomplete tasks.

l Use your public holidays and annual leave to man-age your household and also personal finances.

l If you are married with children and also haveaged parents, keep activities simple and economi-cal and manage expectations of your loved ones.Having a positive balance sheet on your personalfinances also helps career professionals to per-form better.

Employers on the other hand have many opportuni-ties to promote work life balance:l Through better leave management and encourag-

ing both the human resources function and linemanagers to promote better utilisation of leave. Alot of analysis work can be done here to find outwhich employee is taking leave and the burnt-outones.

l Infuse work culture by working with managersand supervisors – promote shorter meetings.

l Develop policies that promote family time andalso personal well-being.

In my company, we have many of such policieswhich promote work life balance such as careerbreaks, educational assistance programmes thatenable time off to pursue professional examinations,birthday leave, and three months maternity leave forfirst-time mothers.

HR TALKTopic Of thE wEEK