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Icebreaker Questions

• What really makes a good friend a good friend?

• How many really good friends would you say you had?

• What separates an acquaintance from someone who you really consider a friend?

• How good of a friend do you think you are to others?

(The objective here is to get the students to consider the complexities of a relationship. Without a doubt,trustworthiness, loyalty, and dependability is going to come up in this conversation, allowing for a smooth

transition into the lesson text.)

One of the things we all mentioned about friendship is loyalty. We want to be close to people who are

loyal, trustworthy, and dependable.  Today, we’re going to look at a woman who was very loyal to her

family, even when she didn’t have to be, and consider how the Bible calls us to demonstrate that same

attitude today in our friendships.

DIGGING INThe woman we’re going to be studying is Ruth. Turn to Ruth in your Bible. It’s right after Judges and

before 1 Samuel.

Background - Ruth was written in the dark and bloody days of the Judges, between 1367-1050 BC.

This is 100 years or so before King David, and over 1000 years before Christ would walk the earth.

Ruth 1 - Naomi, Ruth, and Orpah are faced with the tough decision of what to do when each of their

spouses die. Returning home, Naomi begs her two daughters-in-law to leave her. Orpah eventually does.

Ruth clings to Naomi, refusing to leave her side. They return to Naomi’s home, Bethlehem, just in time

for harvest.

Ruth 2 - Ruth picks up scraps in Boaz’s field. Boaz begins to notice Ruth and watch out for her. Naomi

learns that Boaz is watching after Ruth. Boaz is a relative of Naomi’s and so Naomi instructs Ruth to stay

close to him as he can redeem them and help them.

Ruth 3 - Ruth approaches Boaz (in an awkward way by today’s standards, but it was customary back

then) and he blesses her. He gives her food for she and Naomi and promises to redeem her if the closer

relative will not.

Ruth 4 - Boaz talks to the closer relative who cannot redeem Ruth. Boaz redeems Ruth and the land of

Elimelech. Boaz and Ruth are married. We learn that Ruth is the great-grandmother of King David, and

an ancestor of Christ.

This can be a confusing book when you get into the customs of the time. But in short, you have a loyal

woman who refuses to leave her mother-in-law and, as a result, great good comes of it.

We want to look again at the loyalty that Ruth displays.

Read Ruth 1:16-17

Discussion Questions

1. How many of you have ever had to move from a place you knew to a place you had never been? What

was it like? How did you feel?

2. That’s what Ruth is going through! How hard do you think this was for her?

3. Why do you think Ruth says what she says?

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Whatever the reason, Ruth demonstrates great loyalty to Naomi in coming with her to Bethlehem, even

though she is from Moab. (A Bible map could help students here to understand how far and in what 

direction the women are traveling.)

It is unusual to see that kind of loyalty today, isn’t it?

MAKING IT REALWhat we’re going to do with the rest of our time is focus in on that idea of loyalty.

We started today with talking about friendship. All of you mentioned loyalty, in one way or another, as a

trait that you really valued. The question for today is, “How loyal are you?”

Not just to your friends: how loyal are you to your family, people you don’t know, to God? Loyalty is a

highly valued characteristic, and yet we seldom consider how loyal we are. 

How Loyal Are You?

1.  When a friend asks me to keep a secret, I… a.  keep my mouth shut, I promised! b.  might let it slip a little, but no harm done. c.  become a blabbermouth to everyone I see.

2.  When I tell my parents I’m going to have dinner at home, I… a.  ditch them to hang out with my friends b.  stay at home and have family dinner c.  eat with them but pout the whole time

3.  When a friend has a problem they know that... a.  they can talk to me about anything b.  can talk all they want but I’m not the best at listening

 c.  are better off going to someone else

4.  When someone passes along some juicy gossip about someone I know I... a.  pass it on—such knowledge should be shared! b.  go to that person and ask them if it’s true c.  keep it to myself and stop the chain of gossip

5.  When I commit to someone I... a.  bail if something better comes along b.  keep my commitment no matter what c.  consider what’s best for me before I follow through

6.  If my friend betrayed me I would...

 a.  be really sad and hurt at their disloyalty b.  not care c.  get them back whatever it took

7.  I gossip... 

a.  sometimes b.  all the time c.  never

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 Disloyalty, more than loyalty, is practiced by a lot of us.  We can do this a variety of ways, but often it’s

through betraying people—with actions or words.  Consider what these passages of scriptures say

about gossip in particular:

Read• Proverbs 11:13 

• Proverbs 20:19

• 2 Corinthians 12:20

Discussion Questions

1. What do you think causes us to want to hurt people with words?

2. How much is gossip a part of your life?

3. How is gossip the opposite of loyalty?

Unfortunately, gossip is a big part of a lot of our lives. We might not gossip about our friends, but

remember that we shouldn’t only be loyal to people we are close to.  God calls us to love and be loyal to

strangers, too. Remember the story of the Good Samaritan? We should be committed to people

because they have value to God, not only if they have value to us.

4. Do you think you have the loyalty of Ruth? In what ways?

5. In what ways do you not?

6. How can you become a more loyal person in the words you choose?

7. How can you become a more loyal person in your actions?

CLOSING PRAYER

Some of you may have some real guilt hanging over you right now about mean things you’ve said or did.

To be Godly and loyal, like Ruth, maybe the first step is to ask people who we’ve wronged for

forgiveness. We also need to ask God.

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