Rules for social calls
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Transcript of Rules for social calls
Rules for social callsDo I text you or should I just pop by?
What is a call?
A call is a short visit paid to someoneCard-and-call system created for several reasons:
Sorting who could come to your houseNo feeling of unease in conversationsInforming people
It also enabled to get into the elite circles
How to call on someone?
First, you leave a card to a servantThen, you wait for an answerThe servant comes back with another cardIf the card says “Not at home” = refusalOtherwise you can come in
Rules of calls
Very precise schedule:
Only during the week ≠ on SundayBetween 3-6pm:
3-4 = Ceremonial Call4-5 = Semi-ceremonial Call5-6 = Intimate Call
A call last between 20 and 30 minutesIf your calls are not returned = no will to maintain the relationship
Other codes
If you came in person to deliver the card = turn down one of the card’s cornersYour card had then much more weight
Other codes
When you arrived in town, you would start calling on people as soon as possibleA newcomer waited for the neighbors to leave cards.She/He would then call on them.Sometimes, leaving a card could replace calling on someone.
Other codes
A gentleman would leave two cards: to the mistress and to the head of the familyIf someone else calls during your call, you are to leaveYou should be underdressed rather than overdressedA young woman should never call alone
Other codes
They were different types of calls, for instance:CeremonyFriendshipCongratulationsCondolence(Also to bid farewell)
And many other rules:Send a card 1 week after a deathSend a card at most 10 days after a ball etc…
Cards
Cards designs
Men and Women had different cards.Women’s were bigger (man carried it in pockets)Only the men’s cards could mention an addressWomen’s names never without title Mrs. or Miss
Cards evolved during the 19th Century:Bigger in the Victorian period than during the RegencyMore colorful as time went by
A fine card = good quality paper + engraved
A way to show off
In the entry hall, cards were put in a silver salver.Several goals:
Remembering whom to return calls toShowing the ranks of your acquaintances
Fortunately… There were books to teach you these rules
Several books explained the social manners to be respected, and the calling rules.
For example, Mrs Beeton’s Book of Household Management (1861)
Sources:Janeausten.co.ukJaneaustensworld.wordpress.comHistoryandotherthoughts.blogspot.frJastoryandhistory.blogspot.frEdwardianpromenade.com
The end!