OPUS Made from 100% Scopus Students

©

Mar 12 $5.99 AUD

YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT’S

GOING TO BE INSIDE

Term One is always a fun term. Musical (anyone else really psyched for Oliver?!), Purim, Valentine’s Day, no exams, new teachers and classes, and the beginning of a new year, a new start. 2012 is no exception. This year is the last year of school for the Class of 2012, the first year in Secondary for the Class of 2017, and the very first year of school for the Class of 2024. Throughout the year, all of us will be trying new things and seeing old things in new lights. I know that when I went on the Walking Tour at lunchtime in February (thank you, School Spirit), I saw parts of the school that I had never seen before (including the ‘hottest part of the school’) and learnt things about Scopus that I had never known before (did you know that the Class of 2003 hid all of their Muck-Up Day materials under the stage on the Quad). As a new beginning, I think that Term One should be the beginning of a new adventure. Talk to kids you don’t know. Take wrong turns. Try random things. Cartwheel across the Quad. Say hi to everyone. Pick flowers and appreciate how pretty they are. Sit at the front of the bus for the heck of it, and talk to the little kids. Run to the middle of the Skolnik during a huge rainstorm (warning: you get really cold and wet). Do things without always knowing how they’ll turn out. When you look to fill it, the day has a hundred pockets; so use them! And, most of all enjoy yourself. Whatever it is you do, have fun with it. 2012 will be a great year, I can feel it. I can smell it in the summer, I can hear it in the laughter of the people that I see, and I can see it in the corniness of this sentence. Regardless of corniness, we’re gonna have fun, all of us. Daniel and I would like to welcome you to the first issue of Opus 2012; come in, it’s warm inside. D.F.T.B.A.,

Charlie

EST 1960

The Timetable What’s on in this issue?

4

5

8

11

12

14

In Their Own Words Past Opus editors let you know what Opus means to them

Interview: Librarians Another exclusive Opus interview. Not to be missed!

Guide to Classroom Seating Dylan Dexter shares some of his seating tips with those in need

AFL Wrap Richard Rotstein - Need we say more?

Green Gazette Who is the eco-friendly celeb this issue?

Fashion Police Wanna be on top?

+ Advice with Miss Nancy

To all of our followers,

Don't fret - we haven't given up on you yet. Rumour

has it that some non-believers are spreading their

mumbo jumbo around the corridors of Scopus,

casting doubt on the prestige of this illustrious

publication. Think what you may, but Opus is out to

prove all of the nay-sayers wrong and reaffirm the

loyalty of our treasured subscribers.

We here at the Opus headquarters truly feel sorry for

each and every one of you, having to endure the

colourless holidays and majority of this term without

another engrossing edition of Scopus' favourite

magazine.

Unless you have managed to rip this page out of

someone else's copy, I think you would have already

been able to put two and two together and realise

that we are back for 2012. In apologising for our

delay, we thought it would be fitting to give you

another “brand-spankingly” new edition to add to your

ever-growing collection. This year will give light to

ideas that have been hiding in the basement,

providing even more student faces the opportunity to

give their two cents. As a goal for this year, we want

to publish articles addressing what everyone is

thinking; the sort of things most would be too

embarrassed to say aloud.

Charlie and I, with the help of our prized Opus team,

have slaved away over this issue, all for the

enjoyment of you, our readers. There will be three

massive issues this year, each hopefully better than

the last (if you are all willing to help out). But for now,

enjoy another instalment of Scopus' favourite

magazine.

DJF

Editors:

Charlie Fink Daniel Friedman

16

18

21

25

26

29

49

The Gap Year Antony Kennett reminisces upon his recent gap year

TFiOS Talia Lutchner reviews John Green’s “The Fault in Our Stars”

Look-A-Likes Who is going to stop the mayhem?

Time, Time, Time Daniel Penso explains when it is best to do…everything

Jeans + Runners = ? Mr X. Reporting

NEWS Do you know what’s going on outside the bubble?

The Lighter Side Not everything has to be serious. Seriously!

Year 7 Romy Fanarof

Year 8 Talia Lutchner

Year 9 Richard Rotstein

Year 10 Daniel Shell

Year 11 Lucy Kennett

Opus means many different things to me, but perhaps more than

anything it means the showcasing of the wonderful talents belonging

to the student body at Scopus. There are some truly outstanding

writers at school, and Opus gives them the chance to share their

views with all fellow students to enjoy. In addition, I love the way

that Opus brings kids together. I got so much enjoyment from

watching kids sitting in a circle on the quad, reading, laughing and

really living the Scopus experience.

Daniel Cherny, Opus Editor 2008

OPUS I N T HEI R OWN WORDS : PAST EDI T ORS

To me, Opus is the best way to really experience Scopus. We all have

our own degree of involvement in Scopus life, whether it be through

representing the school in sport, musicals or other activities, but the

only way to get a snapshot of all these things at once is through Opus.

Where else can you see who the most eligible bachelors are, hear

about the school musical and receive insight into the issues, real and

fake, that divide the student body? Nowhere. Through Opus, Scopus

learns about itself, and understands what it truly is.

Antony Kennett, Opus Editor 2010

We’re all sick. We’re disgusting. We lie, we steal, we cheat, we murder, we commit genocide, we bully, we tease, we’re intolerant, we don’t give up our seat to the elderly, we’re bigots and worst of all - we know it. To be a member of the human race is undeniably embarrassing. Opus, though, eschews the trend. Opus, the only authentic platform for student dissent, is the sole remaining beacon of light, the only thing stopping us from turning into primordial savages, from eating each other, from full-blown anarchy. Opus parts the red sea. Opus turns water into blood. Opus cures leprously. Opus is the only accomplishment that we, as humans, can be proud of. With Opus, there is hope for us yet. Eli Mak, Opus Editor 2009

Here goes: sitting on a bus on my way to Jerusalem, and still,

months out of school opus stays with me. The hub of Scopus, the

spirit and vibe of the place is captured and put into words in our

humble 30 page tabloid.

Rapha Tamir, Opus Editor 2011

√16

Interview with

The Librarians

Name: Sandra Gillis

How long have you been working at Scopus?

Since the current year 12s were in primary school

What was your first impression of the school?

How big it was! It seemed like a small town that day! Which is your favourite aisle in the library?

Fiction. Always fiction.

What is your ‘library’ pet peeve?

If people are going to sneak food in, could they at least take their rubbish with them? What do you think of the year twelves?

The year 12s are charming, polite and studious. What do you think we should rename the ‘Silent Room’?

How about the “let’s remember that some people want to study in here and we should be fair and make sure that the conditions are right for them so they don’t have to find somewhere to study” room… Will that fit on the sign?

Name: Miss Elliott How long have you been working at Scopus? 6 weeks

What was your first impression of the school? Wow!

Which is your favourite aisle in the library? History &

Science

What is your ‘library’ pet peeve? Overdue library books What do you think of the year twelves? A lovely bunch! What do you think we should rename the ‘Silent Room’?

Is there one?

Name: Mary Macleish

How long have you been working at Scopus? 6 years

What was your first impression of the school? What a great

library!

Which is your favourite aisle in the library? 700s — lots of cool ART books!!! What is your ‘library’ pet peeve? Tidying up after messy

students…especially those that ‘carve’ up the newspapers.

GRRR!!!

What do you think of the year twelves? I try to think of

them as little as possible.

What do you think we should rename the ‘Silent Room’? Oh — we have a ‘silent room’? I wasn’t aware.

Name: Glenda Scott How long have you been working at Scopus? 17 years

What was your first impression of the school? So big! I

came from a small school. I didn’t think the library had a very

nice atmosphere back then.

Which is your favourite aisle in the library? Hebrew

What is your ‘library’ pet peeve? When it’s pronounced

‘libery’ or ‘libairy’…Maybe I’m not from Liberia.

What do you think of the year twelves? Love them to bits

What do you think we should rename the ‘Silent Room’?

“Those Who Seriously Want To Do Well In VCE Room” 5

Last year, 17 scopusniks went to Israel, where they spent six weeks on Kibbutz up north, living with a family on kibbutz, going to school on Kibbutz and experiencing life among true Israelis.

Simply, a kibbutz is a collective community in Israel who live in an area where there are two main principles: equality and collectiveness amongst the people. In other words, regardless of your job, you all receive the same necessities and everything belongs to everyone.

Kibbutz(s) have developed over time to be more privatised… However, to this day the feel of kibbutz and the community that kibbutz is known for still remains strong.

On our program, we were billeted to families with a kid around our age who went to the school that we would be going to. The kibbutz kids welcomed us with open arms to their homes, where we would be eating, sleeping and living for an entire six weeks.

During the one and half months, we spent Sunday through to Thursday at school on kibbutz, where we learnt Hebrew, maths, Toshba, media and art.

W had two amazing Madrichim, who made incredible activities for us most nights. We learnt and talked about Israel and life on the kibbutz.

On Friday, Kibbutzniks work the fields, work with the young kids and work with the animals. Part of our experience was to work with the cows, in the garlic fields and in the date fields, where we contributed to the collectiveness of everyone working for the kibbutz.

Our experience on kibbutz was one I will never forget, and I urge anyone who can to take this opportunity of a lifetime, to go on the first 6 weeks of Ulpan and learn what it is to be a Kibbutznik!

ULPAN Josh Sacks

byron A couple of year twelves

What does Byron mean to me?

This is sort of, perhaps, maybe a bit of a peculiar question. I viewed Byron as a means to escape from the school year that was. So, naturally, I wanted to forget about everything and bury the previous months far below the Byron beach. It was a time to spend with friends, become more independent and leave shoes behind. My days were spent waking up late, moseying on down to the beach and meeting new faces. Byron was an adventure – a memorable one at that- but most importantly, it helped me prepare myself for this year. Now that it is over, would I go want to go back? Sure, why not… Year 11 was hard. I won’t lie; it was stressful, a lot of work, and totally much more difficult than Year 12 (yeah, right). So, at the end of the year, it was amazing to be able to go away with the rest of the Jewish community to the lovely little sea-side hamlet of Byron Bay. Byron Bay is a cute, sleepy town, filled with a lot of hippies and New Age culture (you would not believe how many pairs of hippy pants I saw in one week), where everyone is very nice and welcoming. On New Year’s Eve, it was commonplace for any person on the street to randomly wish you a Happy New Year and then go on their merry way. It was really fun to just chill for a week with your friends, with complete independence; unlike the school year, during a random day, there’s nothing that you have to do. It was perfectly normal to sleep through the morning and chill at the beach all afternoon; it’s brilliant, especially after a whole year of having something that you have to do every second. I loved spending my time there; it was a great holiday. The Oxford Dictionary defines a holiday as “a day of festivity or recreation when no work is done”; and that, my friend, was Byron.

7

The Ultimate Guide to

Classroom Seating with Dylan Dexter

Whenever you walk into a classroom, you typically ask yourself two questions: Where

should I sit? Who should I sit with? These queries are often immediately answered without

much thought or consideration, but seating position is a huge factor in the classroom

experience. Here are some tips for a more informed choice in seating position…

Tip #1: Take advantage of your environment

The surroundings of each particular classroom

vary, but should be taken into consideration when

selecting your seat. These are some of the most

common classroom features:

Side Walls: A desk that sits next to a wall is

extremely underrated. Having a side wall to lean

on increases comfort and is especially valuable for

in-class sleeping.

Shelves: If your classroom has desks next to

shelves, like in the 300s corridor, I suggest you

claim one of them, allowing you to clear your

books and your workspace.

Aisles: Getting an aisle chair is also an advantage.

There is more room, and these seats are much

more easily accessible, minimizing the number of

awkward moments when you have to squeeze

past your seating partner.

Back Walls: The two-legged-back-wall-lean is

always a popular and comfortable choice for all

you classroom daredevils. However, I cannot

recommend the TWBWL and will not be held

liable for any injuries sustained doing it.

The best seats in any classroom are typically the

ones with direct access to one of these features. I

suggest prioritising desks near your favourite one.

Tip #2: Work out the classroom Hot Spots

Hot Spots are the areas where the most action

happens in a classroom; where the most

communication occurs. There are two main types

of Hot Spots:

Teacher Hot Spots: Sitting near the teacher will

ensure you more involvement in a class. For most

classes this means the middle of the front row, but

there are some teachers who tend to gravitate

towards their favourite areas. Be aware of this.

Student Hot Spots: Sitting near the most

involved, talkative students in classroom

discussion will also result in more action. You don’t

have to be directly next to the student to be in the

Hot Spot.

If you want to learn and be involved in a class, I

suggest getting in the Hot Spots. If you don’t,

avoid them at all costs.

Tip #3: Choose your seating partner wisely

Who you sit next to defines the type of lesson you will have. There are many types of seating

partners, but here are the main ones:

The Mate: Sitting next to your friends typically leads to maximising enjoyment in the class.

However, this also tends to reduce learning and concentration.

The Random: Sitting next to people you don’t know too well, or Stranger-ing may result in a

few awkward moments, but can be a very enjoyable exercise. I recommend it in moderation.

The Expert: Sitting next to the smartest person in the class will result in the greatest degree of

learning. Remember, the Expert is also often the Hot Spot. If you want to actually learn, this is

a wise choice.

The Free Seat: Sitting next to no one means a doubled workspace, but may also result in some

loneliness. Recommended if you want to increase concentration levels.

When choosing your seating partner, the main consideration should be what you want to take

out of the class. Make that decision before deciding who you want to sit next to.

9

2012 AFL Season Predictions Richard Rotstein

Joel Bassat - Year 10

1. Geelong 2. Collingwood 3. Hawthorn 4. Carlton 5. West Coast 6. St Kilda 7. North Melbourne 8. Sydney 9. Richmond 10. Fremantle 11. Adelaide 12. Melbourne 13. Essendon 14. WB 15. Gold Coast 16. Brisbane 17. Port Adelaide 18. GWS

James Fisher - Year 8

1. Geelong 2. Hawthorn 3. Collingwood 4. West Coast 5. Carlton 6. St Kilda 7. Fremantle 8. North Melb 9. Adelaide 10.Sydney 11.Richmond 12.Melbourne 13.Essendon 14.Western Bulldogs 15.Brisbane 16.Gold Coast 17.GWS 18.Port Adelaide

Michael Gruber – Year 10

1. Geelong 2. Hawthorn 3. Collingwood 4. Fremantle 5. Carlton 6. St Kilda 7. West Coast 8. Sydney 9. Adelaide 10. Richmond 11. Western Bulldogs 12. Essendon 13. Melbourne 14. North Melbourne 15. Brisbane 16. Gold Coast 17. Port Adelaide 18. GWS

Brownlow: Joel Selwood (Geel)

Coleman: Josh Kennedy (WCE)

Rising Star: Kane Lucas (Carl)

Bold Prediction: Fremantle to make

the GF

Braham Morris - School Counsellor

1. Hawthorn 2. Collingwood 3. Carlton 4. West Coast 5. Geelong 6. Richmond 7. St Kilda 8. Sydney 9. Western Bulldogs 10. Essendon 11. Fremantle 12. North Melb 13. Adelaide 14. Melbourne 15. Brisbane 16. Port Adelaide 17. Gold Coast 18. GWS

Brownlow: Trent Cotchin (Rich)

Coleman: Jack Riewoldt (Rich)

Rising Star: Brandon Ellis (Rich)

Bold Prediction: Both Geelong and

Collingwood will not play in the 2012

GF

Sharon Stocker- Head of Secondary

1. Geelong 2. Hawthorn 3. Collingwood 4. West Coast 5. Fremantle 6. Carlton 7. Sydney 8. Adelaide 9. Essendon 10. North Melbourne 11. St. Kilda 12. Richmond 13. Western Bulldogs 14. Brisbane 15. Melbourne 16. Port Adelaide 17. Gold Coast 18. GWS

Brownlow: Joel Selwood (Geel)

Coleman: Lance Franklin (Haw)

Rising Star: Billie Smedts (Geel)

Bold Prediction: Goddard to GWS after a poor

year from the Saints.

Lyndon Wise – Year 9

1. Geelong 2. Hawthorn 3. Collingwood 4. Carlton 5. Western Bulldogs 6. West Coast 7. North Melbourne 8. Sydney 9. Richmond 10. St Kilda 11. Adelaide 12. Fremantle 13. Melbourne 14. Essendon 15. Brisbane 16. Gold Coast 17. Port Adelaide 18. GWS

Brownlow: Dustin Martin (Rich) Brownlow: Gary Ablett (GCS) Brownlow: Gary Ablett (GCS)

Coleman: Lance Franklin (Haw) Coleman: Lance Franklin (Haw) Coleman: Lance Franklin (Haw)

Rising Star: Stephen Coniglio (GWS) Rising Star: Chad Wingard (Port) Rising Star: Dom Tyson (GWS)

Bold Prediction: Essendon not to win Bold Prediction: One player to be Bold Prediction: GWS will win more than

a game after round 12. suspended from the AFL for drug abuse. 4 games.

What are your predictions for the upcoming footy season?

Do you think these guys know what they’re talking about?

Lucy Kennett rambling

Brett Deledio: Brett averaged 91 last year playing as a backman only. The

dual Richmond Best and Fairest is now eying a spot in the midfield and should

have no problem averaging a hefty 100 if he is a consistent midfielder

throughout the year. As he has proved in previous years, Deledio is a natural

goalkicker, one of the many traits which made him stand out in his respective

draft where he was pick No. 1.

Brendan Goddard: Goddard, by his standards had a pretty poor

2011 season yet he still managed to average 96. With a

marvellous pre-season behind him, Goddard should easily be

able to capture his 2010 form and dominate the competition

again. At his best, Goddard is in the top 10 players in the

competition.

Brian Lake: In 2010, Brian Lake was clearly the best defender in

the competition. He was also one of the better dream team

backmen too. In 2010, Lake averaged 100 and in 2011 he only

managed to play 5 games due to injury. With an incredibly low

price and an impressive pre-season, Lake should be a player in

most dream teams.

Jack Grimes: Grimes has always been a consistent performer for the

Melbourne football club. However, he has been plagued with many

injuries throughout his career. At only the ripe age of 22, Grimes was

announced co-captain of his club and has managed to have a near full

pre-season. At his price, he should be in most dream teams and

hopefully he can remain injury-free for the rest of the season.

Dane Swan: Dane, the obvious pick and the reigning Brownlow

medallist. In the past three years, Swan has averaged 121, 123

and 119. He is an absolute star and the most expensive player in

the game. However, his price should not distract you from

picking him up because he will undoubtedly prove his worth.

Gary Ablett: Arguably the best player in the game is in for another amazing

year. Ablett has proven his worth and just as Gold Coast is improving, his

scores are sure to follow. Ablett has shown on multiple occasions that he is

capable of pulling out brilliant performances of 40 possessions and 3-4 goals a

game. He is also ultra-consistent. Ablett oozes class and would be a fine

addition to your midfield.

Chris Masten: Masten has never lived up to his potential as the no. 3

overall draft pick in 2007. However, throughout last year, he showed

glimpses of what he had to offer, finishing the year with scores of 111

and 140. His pre-season has been exceptional and he has found his

way into many teams. Get on him while he is still cheap.

Lenny Hayes: Hayes suffered a season ending injury last year and

because of that, his price dropped severely. He averaged 108 in both

2009 and 2010 and has had a full pre-season this year. Hayes is a ball

magnet and in some matches suffers from leather poisoning. If Hayes

can recover his previous form, 380k is a bargain.

Dean Cox: Dean has been overlooked by many fantasy coaches due to his

high price but the reality is, no other ruckman, bar a fit Sandilands, will ever

match his scores. Cox averaged 108 last year and has been repeating his form

into the NAB cup with a game high score in round 3 of 111. Like Swan, don’t

dismiss him because of his price, he is easily worth the cost and is significantly

better than all the other ruckmen.

Ivan Maric: Ivan (pronounced Eevan) has never looked to be a

strong ruckman throughout his entire career at Adelaide.

However, ever since his transition to Richmond, he has been

turning heads. In every NAB cup match he has thwarted his

opponents, including battles against dynamic duo McIntosh and

Goldstein and premiership ruckman, Trent West.

Lance Franklin: No-body can go past Buddy. He is an excitement

machine that does what no normal man can do. The reigning

Coleman medallist has been as flamboyant as ever and is certainly

looking even more ominous than usual. Franklin will at least average

100 per game and that is being conservative. Watch out, Buddy will

reach the pinnacle of his excellence this year!

Dustin Martin: Dustin Martin isn’t alike any other player; he is

creating a name for himself. Last year, Martin averaged 22

possessions and kicked the highest amount of goals out of any

midfielder in the competition with 33. Martin is a tank and will

only improve this year. At only 20 years of age, Martin looks

like he is going to take the step-up.

Patrick Dangerfield: Patrick Dangerfield has been the most frustrating

player in the AFL for many years now. He just has so much potential

and it had been wasted by Neil Crag playing him as a forward. Now

under the Sanderson’s regime, he is being played in the midfield and

dominating. If he lives up to his potential, this speedy player should be

averaging 85+.

Jason Porplyzia: Jason has had an injury riddled career but

finally looks as though he has overcome them. Porplyzia will

be a consistent scorer of 75-90 every week and at only 200k,

he is a complete bargain. According to the Adelaide football

club, he is one of the most professional athletes at the club.

The only risk is whether he can stay on the park.

$452,100 [DEF, MID] Defenders (Locks) $474,200 [DEF, MID]

$329,400 [DEF] Defenders (Value ) $255,200 [DEF]

$554,700 [MID] $598,300 [MID] Midfielders (Locks)

Midfielders (Value Picks) $278,500 [MID] $382,800 [MID]

$532,000 [RUC] Ruck (Value Pick) Ruck (Lock) $262,700 [RUC]

Forwards

(Locks)

$503,000 [FWD] $442,500 [FWD, MID]

Forwards (Value)

Picks)

$349,800 [FWD] $202,500 [FWD]

11

“Harvesting the environmental leaders of the future...”

A Letter from your Enviro Captains

This issue, here at Gazette HQ, we are going WILD with fun facts about the Environment. From Cameron Diaz to a

Jewish environmentalist groups, the Green Gazette brings you the latest gossip about what and who to look for in

the environmental world! Now, go out into the crazy Melbourne weather, enjoy reading this issue of Green Gazette,

and help spread the word about Mother Nature’s latest news! Remember, cool kids help a warm planet!

Love Sophie and No’am

MobileMuster is the official recycling program of the mobile phone

industry. The program collects and recycles mobile phone handsets,

batteries, chargers and accessories in order to prevent pollution and

protect our environment and minimise solid and hazardous waste going

to landfill. We have a MobileMuster box RIGHT HERE AT SCOPUS! All

you have to do is bring your old mobile phones to the secondary office

and we’ll try collecting 200 phones in 2012!

In 2011’s SaveWater Awards photographic category, some great creative talent was recognised as they captured

water conservation imagery as the key focus. All YOU have to do is take a photo of anything that you think could

help save water or an example of water wasting that you want to fix and send it in to sdavi000@scopus.vic.edu.au

or ngeff000@scopus.vic.edu.au. Here are the winners of the SaveWater awards photography competition for some

inspiration…

ECO -FRIENDLY CELEB OF THE MONTH

Cameron Diaz is involved in some

environmentally friendly projects, such as:

Environmental Media Association

Mobilising the entertainment industry in a

global effort to educate people about

environmental issues and inspire them to take

action.

Act Green

Combining rigorous scientific analysis, innovative policy

development and effective advocacy to achieve practical

environmental solutions.

Green Treks

Using television and multimedia productions to tell entertaining

and thought-provoking stories that present both the realities of

our current environment and highlight possible solutions to

environmental problems.

Jewcology is a project created by university students, who have come together to form a resource

for the entire Jewish-environmental community.

Jewcology incorporates collaboration from a wide range of Jewish environmental leaders and

organizations worldwide.

The long-term goal of this project is to build a multi-cultural, multi-generational, regionally diverse

community of Jewish environmental activists, who are learning from one another. From an

expanding set of Jewish-environmental resources, they learn how to educate their communities

about our Jewish responsibility to protect the environment.

www.jewcology.com

What is ?

GET READY FOR…

APRIL 22ND= Earth Day

MAY 3RD

= International Migratory Bird Day

JUNE 5TH= UN World Environment Day

GET READY FOR…

APRIL 22ND= Earth Day JUNE 5TH= UN World Environment Day

MAY 3RD= International Migratory Bird Day

13

Man Candy of the Month

Gurl of the Month

Yoni Fluro Shorts

In Opus’ final edition of last year, we gave all of you fashion-

gurus a little taste of what was to come. The Fashion Police,

comprised of Scopus’ most stylish individuals, is here to share

with you the latest fads, do’s & don’t’s and trends plaguing the

Scopus quadrangle.

In the previous issue, we asked our readers to guess who the

mysterious leading trendsetter was… For those of you who

guessed ‘Yoni Saltzman’ – you are correct!

“Fluro shorts are just really comfy,” Yoni told us earlier this year.

“I just love the feeling of them – you know? Adam Shapiro asked

me if he could buy the red pair, but I told him to find another

colour. I hate it when people are wearing my stuff...”

For all of you boys in need of fashion advice, feel free to contact

Yoni at recess on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

THIS TERM’S

MAN THIS TERM’S

GURL

Rami

Maserow

Rachi

Wolman

Best Feature? He’s

SINGLE!

“About time he got

some recognition

for that jawline”

Cayleigh Abel

“I never knew

George Clooney

went to Scopus”

Tayla Cohen

Best Feature? Eyes,

fo sho

“No matter where

this style diva

heads, she is always

dressed to

perfection.” FP

“Effortless Beauty. I

don’t know how she

does it!” Nick Lewis

Life’s Unanswerable Questions Roni Froumine

If you enjoy wasting time, is it really time wasted?

If Islam, Judaism and Christianity all believe in one G-d, does that mean they all ultimately believe in the same G-d?

Advice with Miss Nancy Dear Miss Nancy,

I’m a proud thespian who can’t get enough of musicals and performing

arts! Oliver is coming out soon and I’m just worried I won’t live up to my

expectations! What can I do? I know I’m talented

If you are talented, and you have worked really hard for this

production, I am certain that you will do well, don’t worry about it. Just

be yourself, let loose and feel the rhythm move through your toes.

Never back down, hold your chin up, you have put so much effort into

this, now prove it to the world.

Dear Miss Nancy,

There’s a rumour spreading around the hallways in Scopus that One

Direction is coming to my birthday party. How do I tell people they’re not

without disappointing them? Stressed

Lisa, I know exactly what you can do. Continue telling everyone that they

are coming until the very last minute, and then BAM they had to cancel

because Liam lost his shoe at a train station again. That way, you will

still have friends. Good luck xoxo

Do you have a question to submit to Miss

Nancy?

Send in your questions to:

opus@live.com.au

Tune into next issue to read about life’s

easier questions…

15

Dear Students of Scopus,

Before you know it, your time at this great institute of learning will be over, and you’ll

be forced out of the metaphorical womb into the cold, dark world of real life. You’ll

have to work to make your own money, go to uni, meet strange, new people, and

live outside of ‘the bubble’.

Sound scary? Well, it is. Sort of. Uni and the outside world are a very different place to

what you and I grew up in. In many ways we were sheltered and kept away from

some of society’s norms and the expectations it sets for us. And because of this, I

decided I needed to write this Opus article to get across one simple point to you, my

sheltered friends: TAKE A GAP YEAR!

I was not always one for the gap year. Initially, I wanted to go straight to uni, and get

on with my studies. But in Year 12, something hit me. I suddenly knew that I needed

to take a year off and go to Israel. I realised that being 18 and fresh out of school is

not the way to go into university. Rather, it is better to have travelled, to have lived

without your parents, and to have experienced the wider world. Now, I don't have

the column space to go into each and every reason for the gap year in immense

detail, so I’ll just explain a few points briefly.

Firstly, coming out of school, few of you are as independent as you think you are. At

home, nearly everything is still provided for you, and the school makes up the rest.

But when you’re away, everything changes. Being across the ocean from your family

forces you to become your own person more than school ever can. While some

programs have more of a focus on independence than others, the simple fact that

you are separated from your parents for an extended period of time is enough to help

you grow as a person, in ways you couldn't imagine. For example, before my gap

year, I couldn't cook for my life. However, after a semester at Hebrew University,

where I was forced to cook for myself three meals a day, I learned that necessary life

skill.

The Gap Year: To Go or Not to Go?

Antony Kennett, past opus editor and collegian shares

his experience of the gap year.

Before Aviv (the five-month AUJS program) I would never have said that I was able to

get myself around a foreign country, rent an apartment, and function independently,

but by the end, all this had changed, and I had become a more self-sustaining person.

The number one reason to go on a gap year is the independence you gain, and the

confidence it gives you to be able to deal with the real world.

My second reason is Israel. You’ve all learnt the facts and the stories about Israel, and

what kind of place it is. But, until you have lived there, you can’t truly understand its

thriving culture. Even after going to Israel on Ulpan, it is impossible to get a grasp on

the true nature of Israeli society, and as Jews and Zionists, going to Israel on a gap

year is the best way to foster this connection. Furthermore, once you get to university,

you’ll have to deal with groups like the Australia Friends of Palestine and the Marxists

(who incidentally are extremely fun to argue with), who believe in Israel’s destruction,

and the best way to combat them is through your personal experiences and what

you have seen over there. This isn’t to say that you should only go to Israel, but Israel

was the most important part of my gap year, and I have come to believe that you

should go there fresh out of high school, for your own personal benefit, as well as to

make you a better advocate on campus.

My final reason I believe you need to take a year off is very similar to the first. It again

comes down to maturity, but this time it is not independence, but rather social

maturity. My friends and I grew up together walking through the halls of Scopus,

playing frisbee on the oval, and chilling on the quad. But we were quite insular; we

had our friends, and we didn't venture much outside the walls of Scopus, and to a

lesser extent the other Jewish schools. But with the gap year, that all changed. By the

end of Aviv, some of my best friends were from interstate, and even overseas. I grew

as a person, and I was able to branch out. But to me, it wasn't just about meeting new

people in Israel. It was also about being able to go to Hebrew University, not knowing

anyone beforehand, being able to suddenly be without some of my closest friends,

and most importantly, to be able to go to Monash, speak to random people and make

new friends.

To me, that is the gap year. It is all about growing up and maturing. In my opinion,

there is no better way to grow and learn than to take a year off, and I hope none of

you have to miss the opportunity.

17

After following John Green and his brother

on YouTube at

www.youtube.com/vlogbrothers - check it

out! – for a few months, I found out he

was writing a new book. After about a

month of anticipation of not knowing the

title, he told us – ‘The Fault in Our Stars’ or

TFiOS. At first I thought, ‘It will be a deep

book, but how can you relate a whole book

to that?’ But then he said it comes from

William Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar quote,

“The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,

but in ourselves. That we are underlings.”

Meaning that we are not as good as others,

and it is a bad thing. But John disagrees, so

he named in The Fault in Our Stars. So I

realised that it would be a very positive

book, in the end.

The main character of TFiOS is girl named

Hazel Grace Lancaster. She has a

cancerous lung tumour and on a certain

drug is surviving. She also has a slight,

undiagnosed case of depression. Hazel is

very caring to her friends and family. She

enjoys poems and books. Throughout the

book she learns to enjoy more things. She

also thinks deeper about life and

experiences things of more maturity.

The Fault in Our Stars

Talia Lutchner

Hazel goes to Cancer Kid Support Group

once every week, and this week someone

new has come. Augustus Waters. After an

obscure start, Hazel has no idea what is to

come, with him. Hazel and Augustus’

relationship lasts for about a year and the

go through many things from laughs to

tears and twists and turns that blow

everyone’s minds. They discuss some of

the deepest things in life and some of the

strangest, all with one foot in the grave.

I think the message in the book was that

love knows no bounds. (Corny, I know.)

TFiOS made me think of cancer in a

completely brand new way. Also, eggs, but

you’ll have to read the book to know why.

TFiOS is a magnificently wonderful story

with brilliant characters, a thought-

provoking theme and rich detail. I strongly

recommend this to all the awesome people

out there.

Don’t Forget To Be Awesome!

The author brandishing a copy of TFiOS. John Green promised to his fans to sign every pre-ordered copy of the book, ending up with him signing over 150,000 books over 75 days.

It’s happened to us all. Picture this. You’re just flicking through your music, innocently pressing the ‘shuffle’ button. Little do you know, that this wakes up the tiny magical gremlin inside your iPod’s shiny case, and he starts up his magical crystal ball which can see into your puny Earthling mind. The next thing you know, your iPod is playing the exact song, out of all 1,468 songs, that you were thinking of, making you exclaim: “Criminey!1 What a coincidence!”. The gremlin has a wide repertoire of choices, from the simple ‘let’s play a song that is oddly relevant to the current situation’, or the more complex ‘the girlfriend is about to call, let’s play ‘Girlfriend’ by Phoenix’, or even ‘Dad won’t stop singing in the car, let’s play ‘Shut Up and Drive’ by Rihanna’. The gremlin sees all, and has a sense of humour. Now, some “smart” kids reading this might say that it’s just chance. “So what if the song ‘Food, Glorious, Food’ came on just as you started eating your lunch? It’s a 1 in 1,468 chance, it’s bound to happen sometime.” Nah-uh, poindexter2, it happens too often for it to be chance. It happens to everyone at least twice. That’s a gazillion times two, which equals a lot. When I put those numbers into my calculator, it makes a happy face. Where’s your maths now, smart guy? The gremlin (a much better explanation than just boring old ‘chance’) eats your battery life, which is why you need to charge it so often; he gets hungry, just like everyone else. If you thought that the iPod uses the battery to do electrical things like light up the screen, play mp3 files, and to break exactly one day and two years after you bought it, then obviously, you don’t understand technology. Everyone knows that music has to be mp3s, otherwise the songs don’t fit in the gremlin’s backpack. Duh. So, the next time that your iPod plays ‘Here Comes The Sun’ by the Beatles at sunrise, or ‘Beauty and the Beast’ when Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber come on TV3, or ‘Paradise’ by Coldplay when you enter the school gates4, just keep that little, hard-working gremlin in mind, and make sure that you keep your iPod charged. Otherwise, the hungry, vengeful gremlin might start playing ‘Friday’ by Rebecca Black. On repeat. For the rest of your life5. So be nice to your gremlin, or maybe you might find your iPod can’t stop saying, “Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday”...6 1 You say criminey, because apparently you’re a ten-year-old from the 1920s.

2 Contrary to popular belief, Poin Dexter is not related to Dylan, Darby, or Dana Dexter.

3 The author holds no judgments of which is the Beauty and which is the Beast in that pair.

4 Haha, good one.

5 He has other methods of revenge, too. You know how your earphones always get tangled in your pocket?

6 ... and now it’s in your head.

Shufflemancy The Magic behind the Shuffle Button

Charlie Fink

19

Zoe Anne Kay Nat Fischbein

Caroline Leeav Henzel

DJ Jay Levy DJ Zac Lang

Landon Gilley Gideon Cohen

Daniel Etzion

WANT TO

SUBMIT A

LOOK-A-LIKE?

OPUS@LIVE.COM.AU

Poor old teacher, we missed you so,

When in hospital you had to go.

For you to remain there is a sin,

We're sorry about the banana skin.

Gilad Harel Chuckie

21

everyone is entitled to

MY OPINION I read the article about the captains. I have been to

many of their assemblies. Although, I am still not

convinced they can ‘bring it’. D. Penso

I can’t wait for the Fashion Police! It’s all so exciting!

Tatum Spicer

StumbleUpon has changed my life (and my

homework routine). Thanks Opus!

Demi Goldberg

I don’t understand how there can be so many look-a-

likes in one school. Ben De Winter

Ben Chamravi should stop complaining about

everything and do something about it!

Akiva Kennard LAST ISSUE

I am usually quite mellow and don’t like to interfere with what goes on the in world. However, after reading an

article in the AJN (a newspaper supported by Opus) about why our school should be sold, I feel I need to let my

opinion be heard.

I can’t believe someone would actually consider selling Mt. Scopus College!

Scopus is home to over 1500 students and is proud to be the largest Jewish day school in the state. Scopus is the

place in which I have grown up, learnt about the world and made life-long friends. Scopus is the place that allows

me to learn about Judaism in depth, surrounding me with the resources to truly embrace my heritage. As far as I

am aware, there is no other school in the country that enables kids to develop such a strong sense of ruach, pride

and Israeli connection. Why would someone want to throw all of that away?

Never before have I been a Scopus advocate…but now that someone wants to take my school away from me, I

can’t just sit around and let it happen.

Anonymous

Opus needs to advertise itself more on Facebook. I have loved the posters around school but I think the team

could do more to make themselves more popular. I am also really disappointed that I have not yet seen an Opus

ad during an assembly.

Jacob Bulafkin

Do you know what grinds my gears? There is an individual who always breaks my lock, but I am still not sure who that person may be. Whenever I come back from a tough religion double only to find out that my valuables are insecure, I know I’m in for a tough day. Watch yourself – I have eyes in the front of my head.

Do you want to know what seriously grinds my gears? I mean, to an extent which is just below boiling point. Whenever I walk pass one of my ex-teachers, I have to act accordingly with politeness and sincerity, like I came to school to be nice. Just because you talked to my mum on the phone three years ago doesn’t mean you know everything about me!

Do you know what kind of grinds my gears? I mean, only slightly. I can’t stand all of the little monsters that push in front of me in the line for the public bus. One day I’m going to get a seat on the 767...prepare for the worst you little gremlins.

BEN CHAMRAVI

23

The Joy of Mech

Every morning, before we set out to endure seven lessons of pandemonium, we sit and

prepare for the day ahead, equipping ourselves with essential stationary and

indispensable pairs of iPod headphones. Some sleep, some talk, some eat breakfast. Each

individual readies himself in a different and more peculiar way than the last, but all seem

to have to deal with the same result - a bell for the beginning of the first lesson.

What do you do in mech?

Reuben Leigh, Year 12:

Chit chat, listen to Motti.

Ash Danino, Year 10:

Are we meant to do something?

Jeremy Abrams, Year 7:

Nothing. Literally nothing.

Mia Brayer, Year 9:

We do prayers, we talk about random stuff that’s going on in the world…

There’s the famous phrase, “Timing is everything,”

which is so true because if you do things at the right

time, you feel some sort of self-achievement. So I

thought I’d share a few good times to note during your

school day, most of these being very strategic.

The best time to… Go to the toilet:

The best time to go the bathroom would definitely be in

between period 3 and 4. If you manage to sneak out to

the closest restroom during this time, you then get to

have your break between all your classes. By doing so

you’re less likely have to go to the toilet at lunchtime

and miss out on all the fun. Be careful of being late to

your next class, it’s a small bracket of time you have,

golden (literally and metaphorically) but risky.

The best time to… Go to the caf:

It may be one of the most frustrating things to wait in a

huge line for your food. Long-time caff fan, recent

critique Annelise Caplan (Year 12) claims that the best

time to go is in the morning, “When the cafeteria ladies

are in the nicest mood because they haven’t had to deal

with any of the lunchtime craziness.” So make sure you

place your order before anyone else does as soon as you

get to school in the morning.

The best time to…have a free:

This applies only to those in year 11 and 12 and is

different for everyone. Some people love their frees as

they can get some study done. Others love this time

because it’s a chance to let your brain relax in between

classes. Either way I’ve worked Monday period 4 and 5

in the library is the best times have a free. Not only is

the library packed with people but there is a variety of

people as well. During Monday period 4/5 there are the

people that you can have a chat with or the people that

can answer any math question, whatever you want to

do, Monday period 4/5 is the time. Matt Hyams (year 11)

says, “I love how one second I can be talking about my

weekend and the next I can get all my homework

questions sorted out by Josh Zail, so much done is so

little time!”

The best time to…visit Mr Liels:

One of the school’s busiest men is also one of the most popular.

If you really want to go visit Mr Liels it would have to be in the

morning as soon as you get to school. Mornings are when he is

most likely to be in his office. He’ll listen to your timetable

complaints or let you in on the latest gossip; he may even share

with you his secrets about shaving. Daniel Sher (Year 9) tells

Opus readers, “If you ask him nicely, he will tell you how he

shaves so evenly. I might not be shaving yet but in the near

future I can’t wait to perfect my skills like Mr Liels has.”

The best time to… spray yourself with deodorant:

The obvious answer is just after lunchtime, but you’re wrong.

Always keep a can of deodorant handy just after class,

especially if you have a test or specific teacher that might keep

you on the edge of your seat (this isn’t a bad thing, at least

you’re alert). You wouldn’t want to be all smelly after breaking a

sweat the lesson before and then after, sitting right next to

someone else with nothing to cover up the stench.

The best time to… go to the veggie garden:

If you ever need to have a lunchtime away from the screaming

year 7s or crazy year 9s, head down to the back of the oval and

take a nice walk around the veggie garden. Tara Kiven (year 10)

reveals, “There’s some sense of serenity around there” when

she takes her fortnightly strolls around the garden. Find your

zen at the back of the oval at the veggie garden.

Hopefully you’ve taken notes from some firsthand experiences

shared with you by fellow Scopus student. Now you may know

when exactly to go to the caff or head for a toilet break. Just

remember, if you didn’t get the right timing, you probably got it

wrong.

The Best Time to…

25

Jeans and Runners:

Haters Gonna Hate

Mr. X reporting

The combination of wearing jeans and runners, also known as ‘junners,’ is the so-called social suicide fashion

disaster of our generation. However, I’m here to argue that it’s not all that bad. The people who would say

otherwise are the “Haters” mentioned in the title of this article. The Haters are never going to change their mind

about junners; they are a lost cause that won’t appreciate my points no matter how valid. But for the rest of you,

here are my 5 reasons why junners aren’t so bad and why you shouldn’t pity those who brave to wear the

combination but instead, admire them.

Convenient: You may meet your friends sometime and they decide to play a soccer

match but you’re wearing a pair of shoes that aren’t made for sport and you either have to

play barefoot or just sit out. At this point you’re thinking, “I wish I had my runners.” So to

wear junners is convenient, moments where you just wish you had your runners because

of their handiness.

Comfortable: You’re out with your friends on the way back from dinner/movie and

the next train comes in 2 minutes but you’re still a 5 minute walk from the station,

what do you do? RUN! This has happened to me too often and I always find myself at

the end of the run thinking “OH wow my feet hurt.” This is because unlike runners,

most shoes aren’t made to run in. If you are wearing your jeans with a pair of runners

however, you might find yourself at the end of that run with no pain at all because of

how much more comfortable runners are with their added support, unlike Vans or

Converses.

Healthy: Continuing on from the support that was mentioned with runners in the

last point, runners are healthy. You’re on your feet all day and those who wear

runners - unlike most people wearing shoes with zero support – are benefiting from

this. People are less likely to have knee and back issues when they wear the right

pair of shoes, the best being a good pair of runners. I’m no doctor but I can assure

you that your knees will thank you for wearing a pair of Asics before your desert

boots.

Stress free: Don’t you hate that movement when you’re wearing your nice pair of shoes and it starts to rain, or you come across a patch of mud that is almost unavoidable? That’s because your mind is so occupied with making sure your shoes are kept nice and clean or else they are ruined the second some mud splashes all over the toe of the shoe. But, if you were out wearing your runners with your jeans you wouldn’t care too much. Runners are made to get dirty and they aren’t your fancy shoes that you wear to a special function so you have to keep them clean. People wearing junners just have one less thing to worry about than you.

For a change, this is for you and not for me.

Desertion Anon.

Sands, an expanse so immense You are unwelcome, though fairest

Of the desert flowers, rarest Most precious, I’ve no recompense

For that which is owed to you. You are welcome here dearest;

Dearest Dearest, you are nearest Led into the vastness, wide blue;

Shunned as the dunes, the stillness The raucous stillness which clatters

In the mind; the mind shatters. Wind-formed dunes, hated as the wind

Loved, blows desolate water

To desolate shores; in tandem Celestial bodies move them

Making valleys deep they vaunter.

As seas contrast, light and dark: The seas are the same. Do you see?

The dunes are the same. Do you see? The wind is the same. Do you see?

\\

You are the love, hate of day and of night There’s no hatred for you, not even slight. Hatred is for that which draws you astray

Towards oases calm farther away. Hatred is for the cause of desertion

But blameless are you is the assertion. Deserts are empty, void of life, estranged;

To not flee deserts for life is deranged.

Recompense- Repay, Compensate Raucous- Rough, Harsh

Celestial- Belonging to the heaven Vaunter- Boast

SAH Indie: How indie are you? Do you button your shirt up to the top? Do you take all your photos with Instagram? Do you wear a big set of glasses even if you don’t need them? If so WEAR JUNNERS! If you want to be the biggest hipster out there and express yourself like nobody else has before, then go against what is considered fashionably accessible. What better way to stand out than having a pair of Asics on while wearing you skinny Levi jeans! Let’s be honest, indie is no longer indie because everyone thinks they are indie so really it is a nothing-term these days because everyone is listen to Angus and Julia Stone. If you want to be truly indie unlike all the wannabes out there, then put on a pair of jeans, find a pair of runners and flaunt the two together.

Hopefully now you have either come to appreciate junners or will at least not look down on those who make

the decision to be more indie than anyone else because they wear jeans with runners.

Much love,

Junners Fan #95351

27

Summer is undeniably the best time of the year. This cannot be debated. It

should be a fact. Don't even try spring...

However, I don't love summer because of the sun, or the heat. It's not because

of the hours spent lazing by the pool or the hundreds of colourful board shorts.

All of the days off school are an added bonus, but what I'm really hinting to has

nothing to do with classrooms and teachers.

Every summer, 7Eleven steps up their game and brings in new flavours, mixing

up the selection from the average cola and raspberry. This summer

particularly, Sevs introduced another game changer, allowing their loyal

customers to create their own flavours. We have now ended up with a

'Flavours of Summer' range that makes us smile all that wider.

How can you not be happy when you have the option of lemon, lime and

bitters, passion fruit and ginger beer?

What is your favourite slurpee flavour and why?

It's all about the Slurpees.

Jordan Berman, Yr 8: Coca Cola; because it tastes like coke.

Sarah Rushford, Yr 8: Raspberry; I like my Slurpees plain. All the other flavours are too complicated.

Joanna Friedman, Yr 10: Lemon Lime and Bitters; because it tastes nice. If you have Coke then it stuffs up your flavour palate.

Ariel Damty, Yr 11: Coca Cola; it’s just superior to all the other flavours. And also because I’m original.

Sophie Davis, Yr 12: Lemonade; because it’s cool — it’s like lemonade, but ice...

2012 was seen as a breakout year for the Mount Scopus

basketball B team, head coach Darren Buick had forced the

athletes through their hardest preseason yet, and the results

were showing. New blood such as, Adam “The Prince”

Hayman,

Dvir “The Rocket” Fichman, Jacob “The Mailman” Silver, Gadi

“The Big Unit” Herskovitz, Aiden “The King” (insert last name

here) and Corey “C-Pizzle” Posner had slotted in seamlessly

into the squad, while seniors Gilad “The Chief” Harel and Sam

“The Enforcer” Spicer looked fitter and stronger than ever.

However, it was not to be. Going into half time of their first

game on level footing, the B team was blown out of the water

by the superb skills of the Emmaus. Unfortunately for the B

team, this was not an isolated incident, in the 2nd

game; they

were blitzed early on, and despite a strong finish, could not

pull through for the win. This was it, this was crunch time.

Head of Sport, Robert Scholz had put the pressure on Darren

to succeed, nonetheless, on the eve of the game against Saint

Joseph’s, senior player “The Chief” was struck down with an

ankle injury, foreshadowing the disaster that was about to

occur.

The B team was humiliated in front of a sell-out crowd at

Oakleigh stadium, losing 98-14 against an unyielding St

Joseph’s team. The B team capitulated and they were under

the relentless attack on the ball and the sheer pace at which

the game was played. Embarrassed and down on confidence,

Mount Scopus looked devoid of leadership both on and off the

field. Coach Darren Buick was quoted as saying “the boys were

just second to the ball and just seemed lost out there”, when

questioned about his future, he quickly changed the subject.

Practice intensified and the lads knew they were in for a rough

week, little did they know what was about to occur. Poached

from Team USA, Daniel Silpert was brought in to change the

underlying dynamics of the team. Under head coach Buick,

Silpert quickly rejuvenated the team with his 3-2 zone,

teaching the players a pressure game and taught them the

basics of defense. Luckily for the B team, the quirks of the

schedule let them have a shot at redemption as they were

about to play fellow winless school, Billanook and with key

men back from injury, Scopus fancied their chances.

Early on the game, The Big Unit and the Mailman dominated

the boards and put the pressure on the scoreboard. It was all

easy for the B team after their early lead demoralized

Billanook, when the siren went for full time, the relief was

palpable, and the smirks on the faces of the battle hardened

players told it all. Darren was “ecstatic with the transition D

shown by the boys” and spiritual leader Sam “the Enforcer”

Spicer really summed the win when he said, “it just really

meant a lot to us, we knew we had to deliver for the coach.”

With morale rising as the team was a still a mathematical

possibility for finals, Scopus was buoyed with the news they

were playing Tintern, below them on the ladder, in next week’s

match. Continuing his rich vein of form, Adam “The Prince”

Hayman, quickly asserted himself into the match, leading his

team offensively and defensively, however, due to a lack of a

clinical edge, the B team went into the half 2 points. With

resilience the B team never knew they had, they forced

themselves to dig deep, and eventually overcame Tintern in a

fascinating match of tactics and pleasure.

In order to keep the media hype to a minimum, the Principal of

Mount Scopus, Rabbi James Kennard, imposed a media

blackout on the players and coaches alike. Undeterred, the

students of Mount Scopus celebrated this momentous event

with much gusto and zest. Head of Sports, Mr Robert Scholz

declared this event “unprecedented in Scopus school history”

and according to several year 7 girls at the scene, after the

Head of Secondary School Mrs. Sharon Stocker heard the

news reported on Fox Sports News, she was seen running in

the hallways screaming, “We’re on a roll! Playoffs here we

come!”

Mysteriously, after the successful implementation of what is

now being called Silpert’s Cluster, Daniel has been fired from

the coaching staff B team citing “family reasons” and was

unavailable for comment. It is undeniable that Darren Buick

will be joining the pantheon of greats. Glory will be set in stone

if he is able to guide the B team to the first finals finish in

history.

Gilad Harel is one of Scopus’ leading sports

correspondents. He will be filling a position on

Fox Sports News early next year, even though

he has made it clear he would prefer to work

on ESPN’s Soccernet Press Pass.

SPORT

NEWS

marched in the pro-democracy Arab Spring protests that began in early 2011, and in response, Bashar al-Assad, playing the role of benevolent leader, began brutally quashing the protests. Soldiers who refused to fire upon unarmed civilians were summarily executed; entire towns were bombed; torture was widespread; and tens of thousands were arrested. The UN estimates that in the past year over 10,000 people, most of them unarmed civilians, have been killed in Syria. Syria is in civil war. The UN Security Council has tried to act; however, both Russia and China have vetoed all resolutions about Syria. Their reasons are unknown to anyone except them: but the fact that Russia’s only port in the Middle East is in Syria may have something to do with it. At the moment, violence continues; Syria’s been expelled from the Arab League, and sanctions are dragging down the Syrian economy, but will this force al-Assad to resign? And if he does, will Syria be stable again, or will they again return to having a gazillion coups a year? It’s interesting to note that the flag run by the pro-democracy protests is flag 1: the flag that flew during Syria’s many years of instability. Perhaps instability is needed for democracy to be born. Perchance it is only within the crucible of conflict that the strongest metals are forged. Maybe it’s only when things are all up in the air can they fall into place. Who knows? Only time will tell.

Charlie Fink Red-Haired Correspondent

And That Was the News in Brief

Hey, Syria, what’s going on? I heard that you’re in civil war, there’s something about Christmas celebrated by Muslims, and you’ve got a new old flag? To understand what’s going

on now, we need to look at

what happened then; so

here is a very brief history of

Syria (that probably misses

out a lot; apologies,

Syrians). Syria declared

independence from France

in 1946 (picking a new flag:

number 1), which

immediately began a period

of instability; everything

went everywhere. 12 years

later, Syria and Egypt

decided to become the

same country, called the

United Arab Republic

(which of course needed a

new flag: number 2); but,

after three years together,

Syria went back to being

just Syria (and took back its

old flag: the first response

in any break-up, along with

ice cream). This led to some

more instability and a

couple of coups; which

ended up with the Ba’ath

party taking power in 1963

(with an all-new flag,

number 3); these guys believe that

all Arabs should come together in

one socialist, secular, utopian

state (so far, it hasn’t happened).

Then, in 1970, Hafez al-Assad

became President by a bloodless

coup (the best kind of coup).

Under his rule, there was good

and bad: a constitution was

passed (and stuck), but he also

happened to kill a lot of dissidents;

the economy grew, but he also

invaded Israel disastrously in the

Yom Kippur war. As if he wanted

more trouble, he entered the

Lebanese civil war in 1976, first on

one side, and then on the other;

beginning a Syrian occupation of

Lebanon that would last for

almost 30 years. (Also, he changed

the flag twice: first in 1972 [see

flag 4] and then went back to the

old flag from 1958 [flag 2] in 1980.

What’s with these Syrians and

their flags?)

In 2000, Hafez died; leaving his son, Bashar, to rule (coincidentally, right after Hafez died, the parliament passed a law lowering the minimum age for President from 40 to 34; guess how old Bashar was at the time?). Bashar was elected with 97.9% of the vote, which sounds impressive until you learn that he was the only one on the ballot. Thus endeth the history lesson. Now, in the present-day: many Syrians

We’ll Be

Back

Can you recognise this

familiar Scopus teacher?

Want to submit a

cartoon of your own?

Want the world to see

your creation?

opus@live.com.au

Dylan Klein

OVERHEARD

"Lucky we have disposable thumbs”

"They are hiding their milk in the fridge"

"I didn’t know people were allowed to marry objects"

"How many times have I told you not to put your hand up?”

"Stop It! I am writing very loudly!

"Can you move out of the way?! I can’t hear what they are

saying”

"Hahahah… Rule No. 1 – Never laugh at what students say”

"Mr. Frigo should be my father."

49

DOES MATTI BOROWSKI MAKE THE GRADE?

OPUS’ SCOPUS EXAM