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On the Move | Making Family Relocation Work for You

A family preparing to move

This week, we’re privileged to have Montreal-based intercultural consultant Jen Fletcher write a guest blog for us all abouthow to make family relocation work for you and yours.

“If you have ever relocated to a new city or country, you know that the process can be exciting, stressful, and hectic – all atonce. Relocating with children presents its own unique set of challenges. Parents often get bogged down in the logistics ofthe move, and don’t realize that the kids might be stressed or even frightened about the “big move”. Whether you havebeen reassigned to a new country for work, or if you are seeking greater opportunities in a new country, the success ofyour relocation is highly dependent on the happiness of, well – your dependents..

Here are some things to consider when moving with the entire family:

Making Family Relocation Work for You Before the Move:

Take time to talk.

Tell your children as soon as you can about the upcoming move and be as honest as possible. Express your concerns

without watering them down. With your desire for the kids to feel happy about the move, it’s tempting to put a positive spinon things. The more frank you are with your children, the more open the kids will feel about sharing their own concerns.The kids need to know that moving is exciting but not always easy. One strategy is to write down the family’s concerns andtry to come up with possible solutions. This gives the children – and you – an action plan and a problem solving strategy.

Say cheese!

Together with the kids, take pictures of your old house, favourite places, and friends. This way, the kids will maintain aconnection to a place and people that are important to them.

Read up.

Help the kids learn as much as possible about their new country, city, neighbourhood and school. This will take some ofthe fear of the unknown out of the equation and open the door to excitement and a sense of adventure.

Have a party!

Sometimes children don’t get the chance to say good-bye to their friends at school. Give them the opportunity to bothcelebrate the move and to say their farewells by throwing a party. It’s also a good time to make sure that the kids haveeach others’ e-mails, mailing addresses and phone numbers so they can stay in touch with their friends.

Kids playing together outside (c) Keith Berr Photography

Just arrived!

Keep the routine. If at all possible, make sure that the kids’ first night in their new home is comfortable. Try as much aspossible to stick to your usual routine. Children find comfort in routine and following your usual one right away will helpthem feel more secure in their new surroundings.

Time to unpack.

Let the children help unpack and decorate their own rooms as a way to participate in the relocation process and to maketheir rooms a “feel-good” place. The more input they have on their new environment, the more they’ll feel a part of themove – instead of it being something that “their parents did to them”.

A child helps his parents unpack the move

Celebrate your arrival!

Have a celebratory family dinner out, this will help raise morale and will be a good time to make family plans for thecoming days and weeks.

Get out and explore.

Spend time with the kids exploring their new surroundings and discovering new things. This will build confidence, help

orient everyone and provide quality time together if things need to be discussed.

Socialize.

If you have friends or colleagues who have kids around the same age, arrange a get-together. Getting to know othersgives everyone a sense of belonging, and the children will have peers to connect with. When the kids mention new friendsfrom school, initiate and organize a get-together or play-date to help cement new relationships.

It’s not all about the kids.

Sometimes with relocation comes some a shift in the roles of the parents. While previously, both parents may have beenworking, visa regulations or job situation may dictate a change in this pattern. This change in family roles, along with therelocation, can make things doubly difficult. One of the main reasons for unsuccessful relocation is that the accompanyingpartner is not adjusting well. A sense of isolation is very common, especially when the kids are at school and the otherparent is working over-time trying to get up to speed at their new job. Be attentive to one another and find things to dowhere there is a potential to meet other people, such as fitness groups, expat clubs or language classes.

A fitness class is a great way to socialize

The best advice for the entire family during the relocation: Give it time but don’t be passive.

Talk, get out there, be social and do things together. Before you know it, you will have been in your new location for an

entire year and feeling like it’s always been your home.”

If you’re unsure of which Canadian neighbourhood might be right for you, or if you wantto find out more about the neighbourhood you’re moving to next, be sure to check outNavut’s Neighbourhood Finder to help you on your way!