PARENTING

A REAL CASE STUDY

• Haematologist Story

WHY NEED OF PARENTING

• STORY : ENGINEERING COLLEGE

• JOINT FAMILIES MISSING

• MODERN CULTURE

INFLUENCE , INFLUENCE

OF MODERN GADEGTS

• IMPERSONAL CITY

LIFE,ETC

TYPES OF PARENTING

FLY

MOSQUITO

BEE

A GARDENER

CHILDREN NEED TIME AND

LOVE

•Example of lady

working in bank

•Example of lady

Dietician

Have Patience

GIVE CHILDREN HAPPY

EXPERIENCES

Parents generally complain

“Children don’t listen”. The point is that - DO WE?

POSITIVE PARENTING

THOMAS ALVA EDISON

•Example : Child

with fever wanting

ice-cream.

•Example : Bird

dropping dung.

Use NO as less as possible.

Sometimes give into child

demand. E.g. Exemption from

daily study schedule.

LIVE YOUR VALUES IF YOU WANT THEM TO BE

• KIND BE KIND

• RESPECTFUL BE RESPECTFUL

• COMPASSIONATE BE COMPASSIONATE

• SELF CONTROL BE SELF CONTROLED

• GRATEFUL BE GRATEFUL

•WE SHOULD TEACH

VALUES TO OUR

CHILDREN BY OUR

OWN EXAMPLE .

SHARING , PATIENCE

TOLERANCE , ETC

[ SHOW VIDEO OF

FOOTBAL ]

PLAY TIME

• E.G. BIRTHDAY

CELEBRATION OF A 5 YEAR

OLD CHILD HAVING MAGIC

SHOW,ETC

• CHILDREN ARE ENERGY

BUBBLES

• ENCOURAGE CHILDREN

FOR PAINTING,DRAWING,

CRAFT WORK,ETC

LET CHILDREN HAVE FUN /GOOD

TIME

STORY TIME BEFORE SLEEP

• HAVE DINNER TOGETHER AND MAKE

IT FUN AND JOYFUL. E.G.- IF SALT

NOT PUT IN VEGETABLES….

“DO NOT DISCUSS

CONTROVERSIAL

ISSUES “

DO NOT COMPARE YOUR CHILD

WITH OTHER CHILDREN.

• CHILDREN 1 TO 4 YEARS GET

DIVERTED VERY EASILY

• HELP CHILD TO SOLVE OWN

PROBLEMS E.G. CHILD’S BROKEN PENCIL

• GIVE OPTIONS TO CHILDREN E.G.

CHILD RUNNING AROUND IN

SUPER MARKET

NO BEATING CHILDREN

• CHILD LEARNS THAT YOU

CAN USE FORCE IF

SOMEONE DOES NOT

LISTEN TO YOU

• BUT WE CAN BE FIRM

DISCIPLINE PUT RIGHT PRESSURE

• WHEN CHILD MISBEHAVES,

DISAPPROVE HIS BEHAVIOUR

BUT NOT HIM AS WHOLE .

• DO NOT KEEP REMINDING CHILD

OF A PREIVOUS BAD BEHAVIOUR

. E.G. DAUGHTER IN LAW

FORGOT TO PUT SALT IN

VEGETABLE DISH …

AVOID LABELLING

• IF YOUR CHILD IS

NOT AN ACHIEVER

IN EARLY AGE , DO

NOT WRITE HIM OFF

[SHOW VIDEO OF

PAINTER]

SPORTS DAY

EMPHASIS ON

SPORTING SPIRIT

• WHEN MAKING RULES

INVOLVE CHILD E.G. T.V. TIME

• ANOTHER E.G. CHILD ALWAYS

WANTING TOYS

• WHEN CHILD COMES WITH

PROBLEM,HEAR HIM FULLY.

ACKNOWLEDGE HIS FEELINGS

• DO NOT BE LIKE A POLICE

MAN.

• STORY – BEGGAR EATING IN

TAJ HOTEL

• PSYCHOLOGIST SAY A COMMON

PERSON USES AROUND 5 TO 6 % OF

HIS POTENTIAL , GENUIS AROUND

10 TO 11 % .

• E.G. A CHILD WANTING TO CLIMB

A TREE…

• STORY : TWO BOYS FLYING KITE,

AGED 7 & 9 THEN 9 YEAR FALLS IN

WELL…

• APPRECIATE YOUR CHILD

• BY APPRECITION WE REINFORCE

POSTIVE BEHAVIOUR.

• EXPERIENCES WHICH A

CHILD GOES UPTO SIX

YEARS BECOMES BASIS

OF HIS PERSONALITY .

• GIVE THE CHILD THE

FELLING I AM THERE FOR

YOU.

• AVOID FEAR TACTICS.

PARENTS FIGHTING

• CAUSES INNER INSTABILITY IN

CHILD.

• CAUSES A LOT OF

PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE.

• TEACHES THE CHILD BAD

EXAMPLE OF INTERPERSONAL

RELATIONSHIP.

• HE WILL TEND TO REPEAT THIS

EXAMPLE WITH HIS WIFE.

• IT IS IMPORTANT THAT THERE

SHOULD BE A GOOD EXAMPLE OF

HUSBAND WIFE RELATIONSHIP AT

HOME.

• BOTH HUSBAND AND WIFE SHOULD

BE SENSITIVE TO EACH OTHERS

NEED AND HELP EACH OTHER GROW.

• RESEARCH CONDUCTED, 72,000

MARRIED WOMAN INTERVIEWED .

LOVE , RESPECT , FRIENDSHIP.

• E.G.- HUSBAND RETURNING TO A

MESSY HOUSE…

• MARRIAGE DESCRIBED AS

INSTITUTE FULL OF

ADJUSTMENTS.

• E.G.- LINE ON A STONE

• WOMAN TO UNDERSTAND

NATURE OF MEN & MEN TO

UNDERSTAND OF WOMEN

• IN IMPORTANT FAMILY

DESCIONS HUSBANDS SHOULD

CONSULT WIFE

• HUSBAND SHOULD HEAR WIFE .

SOMETIMES WOMAN DO NOT WANT

SOLUTIONS TO PROBLEMS ….

• HEARING IS HEALING

BALANCING PROFESSIONAL

& PERSONAL LIFE

• HUSBAND EVERDAY TO TALK TO

CHILD FOR A MINIMUM OF 10 TO 15

MINUTES.

• GO FOR THINGS LIKE ICE CREAM.

• YEARLY HOLIDAY TRIP.

• SOMETIMES RING UP FROM OFFICE

TO ENQUIRE ABOUT WELL BEING

AND IMPORTANT EVENTS IN THE

CHILD’S LIFE.

GOOD UPBRINGING OF

CHILDREN MAY TAKE

EFFORT AND CAUSE

HEADACHES BUT BAD

UPBRINGING WILL

CAUSE HEARTACHES

• INORDER TO BE

SUCESSFUL IN

PARENTING NO

SHORTCUTS.

HARDWORK IS A MUST

[ SHOW VIDEO OF

FATHERS SACRIFICE

FOR CHILD ]

• PREGNANT LADIES SHOULD

NOT TAKE STRESS. IT

CAUSES CHILD TO BE

HYPERACTIVE.

• BEFORE BIRTH OF SECOND

CHILD, PREPARE THE FIRST

• WHEN SIBLINGS FIGHT DO

NOT TAKE SIDES. NO

PHYSICAL

• WE SHOULD CULTIVATE

SHARING OF OUR

EXPERIENCES AND

FEELINGS WITH OUR

CHILDREN . IT IS

IMPORTANT FOR ONE TO

VENTILATE AND SHARE .

SHOW DIAGRAM

WHEN

CHILDREN MISBEHAVE

• IF CHILD GETS 3 BAD

REMARKS IN ONE MONTH. GO

DEEP.MAY BE SOME HEALTH

PROBLEM , GETTING TEASED,

ETC.

• JUST DON’T GO ON FACE VALUE E.G. JAGGU DADA AND

BUS TICKET.

• STORY : BIG WARSHIP & SMALL

VESSEL

• READ SON’S POEM ABOUT DADDY

• CHILREN IN SOME LATER

STAGE OF LIFE WILL

DEFINETLY REALIZE THE

LOVING EFFORTS OF THEIR

PARENTS IF PARENTING

WAS DONE PROPPER

[ SHOW VIDEO OF MOTHER –

CELLO ]

• A NEW CONCEPT IN TODAY’S PARENTING – CHOOSE

OPTION WHICH WILL DO

LEAST DAMAGE

• CHILDREN PICK UP FROM

PARENTS BEHAVIOR

• DO FOUR STEP HAND

EXERCISE

• READ PARENTING POEM

AS PARENTS OUR

JOB IS TO TAKE

CARE OF WHAT IS

POSSIBLE AND

TRUST GOD WITH

THE IMPOSSIBLE

• “IF I HAD MY CHILD TO RAISE ALL OVER AGAIN . I WOULD BUILD SELF ESTEEM

FIRST , AND THE HOUSE LATER . I

WOULD FINGER POINT MORE AND

POINT FINGER LESS . I WOULD DO LESS

CORRECTING AND MORE CONNECTING .

I WOULD TAKE MY EYES OFF MY

WATCH , AND WATCH WITH MY EYES . I

WOULD TAKE MORE HIKES AND FLY

MORE KITES . I WOULD STOP PLAYING

SERIOUS , AND SERIOUSLY PLAY . I

WOULD RUN THROUGH MORE FIELDS

AND GAZE MORE STARS . I WOULD DO

MORE HUGGING AND LESS TUGGING ” – DIANE LOOMANS

END OF FIRST

SESSION