Never Mind The Nooboos. Part One
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Transcript of Never Mind The Nooboos. Part One
In which we meet the unhappy couple and the first six children are vomited into the
world to terrorize me forever more.
Hello one and all to my sad attempt at a
26 pregnancy challenge. In the style
of MythMil and DeBunny, I will be attempting at a mix
of population explosion and 10 kid
challenge.
Yeah, I was bored and wanted to try it
out.
Here are the couple, just graduated from college and ready to
go.
Name: Regina Emery Havar
Aspiration: Knowledge
Secondary Aspiration: Family
Turn Ons: Red hair/Glasses
Turn Off: Fat Personality: Aquarius
(4,4,4,7,6) Hobby: Nature
Regina comes with gold badges in
Toymaking and Robot...ery and a
silver badge in Gardening. She has high points in most
skills and max enthusiasm in both
tinkering and arts and crafts.
Name: Klaus DeMarco
Aspiration: Knowledge
Secondary Aspiration: Family
Turn Ons: Blonde/Make Up Turn Off: Smell
Personality: Virgo (9,2,6,3,5)
Hobby: Science
Klaus comes with gold badges in
Gardening, Sewing and Flower
Arranging and all skills maxed byt
Mechanical, which has two empty spots.
He also looks slightly Japanese, which is an
unexpected perk. While I did make him, I payed very
little attention.
Klaus and Regina are quick to get married
after four years at college engaged. The
only witness is the vampiric paperboy.
'I vant to deliver your paper. Ah ah ah.'
Nice.
Why is the paperboy a vampire, I hear you
ask. Well, the Pyre family of my legacy
"The 'Pyre Chronicles" just moved into this
neighbourhood, and have been biting
everyone they can. This was the work of
the teenage hottie, Angel.
Hey guys!
'I hate you!'
You would Regina. Luckily, her husband is nicer to me. They
both get to finding jobs for their LTWs.
Klaus wants to become Education
Minster and Regina wants to be a World Class Ballet Dancer.
Don't we all?
'Are you still here?'
I hope that you have quads every time you
give birth!
'MONEY!!'
It seems that we've found a way to keep
Regina happy. She is a faux Knowledge sim. Her wants are more like that of a
Pleasure sim and she rolls wants to buy
stuff like a Fortune sim. Never wants to
skill, hence the gaping gap between
her skills and Klaus's.
Anyways, along with their base money and
the money made from selling most of the
crap they made/grew in college, we can
afford a mighty fine...box house.
The newly weds waste no time
conceiving baby number uno.
'Go away!'
'Umm...please can we have some
privacy...Alice...please?'
For you Klaus, not Regina. Meanie!
P.S. First try! Klaus has got some great
swimmers in his tank.
What's up Genie?
'Genie?'
Do you prefer Reg?
'Genie is fine. And I feel all cranky and moody and irate.'
Same as always then.
'Oh, yeah. But that doesn't explain my
sudden desire for chocolate covered
mushroom ravioli in custard.'
BABIES!1!!!one!
'And one day my family will be so big
it will take over the whole world!'
Way to aim small there, Klaus. I love
the talk to plant option. Even as we are being judged to get into the Garden
Club, Klaus continues to sell
propaganda to the oranges.
We got in, but no wishing well. *pout*
ALICE WANTS A WISHING WELL!
Having fun being fat, pregnant and useless?
'Why is that strange lady playing my
piano?'
Because you never do. And it's Klaus's
piano.
'I sense many pointless arguments
between us.'
Indeed. I cannot wait until I move my simself into the
neighbourhood.
*squeal* Best. Townie. Ever.
Elf Ears. Smexy hair.
Off beat clothing. Pouting lips.
And his name is SETH! Excuse me
while I fall into a quivering heap on the
floor. Finally, a half decent townie has
been generated in my game!
Promotions mean friend making. I
really am no good at friend making. I can
get a sim 20 lovers or 50 woo hoos, but when it comes to
making friends without flirting,
kissing, hugging and woo hooing, I suck. I tend to just have my sims meet a load of
people and then have a phone calling
marathon, fuelled by Red Bull.
Oh, I guess this little guy deserves an
introduction. This is Genie and Klaus's
college pet, Reepicheep. He's
named after my recently deceased
guinea pig, who was named after the
mouse from Narnia. Somehow, he hasn't
died yet, but let's see if he's still here at the end of the challenge.
If so, I will call it a success.
'My gorgeous and well toned body, she
is ruined!'
Bwa ha ha ha! This is the start of a
downward spiral for you, Reg my dear.
'Yeah, listen. I need someone whacked.
Uh huh. She's...well, she lives Beyond The Glass Screen. No, I'm
not pulling your leg. Yes, I want Alice
killed. Hey, don't take that tone with me, sir.
I was told that you were the way to go if
I wanted someone dead. Oh, well go
woo hoo yourself!'
Regina, darling, why are you trying to have
me killed?
'*looks pointedly at stomach* Hmmm...'
Oh. Right.
'KLAUS! You cannot make me laugh like that!'
'Why? Oh no, did I hurt the baby? Shall
I drive you to the hospital?'
'No, but I may pee myself!'
Nice. Way to give your overly kind husband a heart
attack Genie.
There's something missing from this
picture...
Much better.
'Grr.'
Was that meant to scare me Genie?
Woot! Klaus maxed all his skills, bringing
in a huge aspiration bonus. If only it had
been a LTW.
'I know. It's a shame.'
Now, start making more friends so that
we can get you promoted to your
actual LTW.
'AHHHHH! Where's Klaus?'
Gardening.
'Well, can you ask him to come here?
The baby is coming!'
I could, but you tried to have me
killed, so I won't.
'AHHHHH!!!!!'
WTF?
Oh, I accidentally downloaded
genticised skins again. Just a
moment...
...much better. Here he is, baby number 1,
Admes. Green eye like Regina, red hair
like Klaus and skintone 2. He is
named after a vamipre in one of Jennifer Rardin's books. They're a
good read if, like me, you are obsessed by
vampires, necromancy and
various other undead type things.
P.S. I have the triplets and quads
hack and to make this all interesting, I have each on 25%. Bwa ha
ha ha! I'm evil to myself.
The happy couple waste no time on
making another batch of kidlets.
First time again. Woot!
You okay Genie?
'*barf* I hate you for doing this to me! *gurgle splash*'
Sure sure. You love it really.
BIRFDAY TIEM!!!
Yeah, expect a lot of this and don't expect me to ever come up
with interesting or witty captions.
Post makeover.
He's pretty cute. I have to admit, it
took time for him to grow on me. Klaus
and Regina's genetics look a little odd on toddlers, but
they grow up cute. Honest. At the
moment his cheekbones are a
little bit crazy.
Klaus gets right to teaching Admes his
toddler skills.
'He's a clever kid, my boy. But...why is he
glowing?'
Magic, my dear Klaus. Magic.
Nice.
'What the hell are you making me do this?'
It's Friday.
'You say that as though it explains
everything!'
It does. Every Friday we have a nice family
portrait like this. Klaus and Admes
don't seem to mind.
'They are morons. Now let me go and
waste everyone's time with a sucsession of 500 point wants that
will dirve you insane.'
Have I mentioned how much I hate you
recently, Reg?
'DON'T. CALL. ME. THAT!!!'
Whatever, Reg.
'RARGGGG!'
Step away from the baby!
'What? Alice, he is my son and all.'
'Awice? Who's da weird lady?'
Point proven. This is the first time she's
been near Admes since...birth.
If this isn't quads I'll eat my hat. Look at
that belly. No way is that one kid.
DUDE!!
'I'm like a whale with feet.'
I've always thought that.
I'm not mean. I really wasn't paying
attention when I placed the
xylophone. I didn't mean to have
Admes permanatly in the corner.
Oh wells. I could fix it, but I won't.
'WHY WON'T YOU ANAL
PROBE ME?'
Nice. I want aliens, as I like aliens. But they are refusing to come and get little Klaus. Annoying.
MOAR BABIES!!!!
Yes, plural. Okay, let's see if I can get
this right.
First is a boy, named Brian. He
has skin tone 4, blonde hair and
green eyes, making him a clone of
Regina. He is named after Brian from The
Dresden Dolls, one of my favourite
bands.
Another boy, this one is called Benjamin, but will be known
from here on as Bennie. He has skin
tone 1, green eyes and red hair (IRISH CHARM!!!) and is
named after the band Breaking Benjamin, who are awesome.
A girl this time, named Bellatrix,
after Bellatrix Lestrange from
Harry Potter. She has skin tone 4, blue
eyes and blonde hair. From now on she shall be known
as Trixie, for a reason that will become quickly
apparent.
And last is another girl, this one named
Beatrix (see why I needed a nickname for Bellatrix?), but
will now we known as Beetroot. She has
skintone 3, green eyes and red hair, and
is named after Beatrix Potter.
'So, there's still room for one more
kid.'
Yes, no time is wasted after the
birth of the quads. They're dumped in a
room filled with snapdragons and baby C is made.
YAY!
*snore*
Ummm....random Curious brother, please put Trixie
down.
'She was dirty and now she isn't. I do
good.'
Creepy. GENIE! Come and save the
baby!
I don't have a good picture of Admes's face, but trust me,
he's cute!
I get him straight to skilling. I wants
points!
'But-'
POINTS!
'Again?'
Many, many times again.
Bwa ha ha ha!
'*sigh*'
Klaus?
'...'
Klaus?
'Why is he staring at me like that?'
'I love you.'
Yeah, Klaus follows Genie about like a
lost puppy, while she acts as though she doesn't even know
what a nice point is. They are an odd
couple.
What is it?
'SNOWDAY!!!!'
Cool. Now, go skill.
'Darn. I'd rather go to school.'
Whatever.
Creativity.
In the style of Myth Mil and DeBunny, I
will be putting tidbits of info here.
It took a while to decide what to
chose, but I think it's a good one. See,
people are generally ignorant when it
comes to my homeland of Britain.
Especially Americans. No
offence, you're a lovely race of
people, but I've been asked one too many
times if I have lunch with the queen or how come I don't
live in London because that's all
there is.
Information put here will be taken from
the book "England: 1000 Things You
Need To Know" by Nicholas Hobbes. Good book, great
read.
FOUR BIRFDAYS.
I'll just show you the little tykes post
makeover.
Trixie. All say awww.
Beetroot. Again, aww.
*faints*
My favourite so far, Brian. He's so darn
cute.
And Bennie. He looks a bit like an
alien at the moment, which is why you
will see no shots of him head on.
Trixie is fast to start making friends.
'I'm a princess and everyone will do as
I say.'
Cuteness. Now go and skill!
'Why the hell are you making me do this?'
Because I knew that it would piss you off.
'I. Hate. You.'
Toddler skilling time.
I won't bore you with it.
Nawwww.
While Trixie has ten nice points, it's
Beetroot that acts like she does. She's
so nice to everyone, even Bennie the
outcast.
'Love Bennie!'
'What is love?'
DID I SAY YOU COULD SMUSTLE?
SKILLING NOW!
'But...Alice...I've forgotten what fun is.'
I don't care. The faster you skill the faster you will be
able to have fun again.
'*sigh* Yes ma'am.'
Logic.
The population of England was, in the
2001 census, 49,138,831.
23,922,144 were men and 25,216,687 were
female.
Bwa ha ha ha! Women rule this little
island!
Mechanical.
England is 50,363 square miles
(130,439 square metres). The highest point is Scafell Pike,
at 3,210ft and the lowest point on land
is Holme Fen, Cambridgeshire at
9ft below sea level!
Told you it was tiny.
'AHH! Twin wives having babies!'
No, Klaus. It's a mirror. Just one
wife.
'Phew.'
'I. WILL. KILL. YOU. ALL!!!!'
Baby girl C, named Carrie after Carrie
Underwood. Skintone 3, blue eyes and blonde
hair. Cuteness. Now, lock her in the
snapdragon room and get skilling.
SKILLING!!!!
To aid the skilling, Klaus whips out this
doobrie-ma-thing and makes it
Autumn again. Not Fall. Autumn. All the languages the Sims is translated
into, why not English?
IT'S AUTUMN!!! NOT FALL!!!!
In case you didn't know, I'm English.
Charisma.
The furthest place from the sea in
England is Coton in the Elms (nice
name, isn't it? Very English),
Derbyshire, which is 72 miles away from
the big blue. The traditional
geographic centre is Meriden in
Warwickshire. However, the
Ordnance Survey's Gravitational
Method Of Mapping gives the title to
Fenny Drayton in Leicestershire, as it
includes the nation's small islands.
Yeah, there are islands smaller than
England. Unbelievable.
Cooking.
The highest recorded temperature in
England was 38.5 degrees C (101.3
degrees F) in Kent on 10 August 2003 and
the coldest temperature was -
26.1 degrees C (-15 degrees F), in
Shropshire on Jan 10th 1982.
Unless you live in Antartica, never
complain that your home is cold. You
don't know cold until you live here. That highest temp was a fluke that has never
happened since.
Logic.
Our principal crops are wheat, barley,
potatoes, sugar beet and oilseed rape.
Natural resources include coal,
petroleum, natural gas (farmers and all,
they can't help it), tin, limestone, iron
ore, salt, clay, chalk, gypsum, lead and
silica.
If only it was gold. That would be
awesome.
Body.
We have a 99% literacy rate, though you wouldn't know
it talking to the "hoodies" I live
near. However, the low intelligence of my locals may be
linked to the 81% of the population that
own mobile phones.
Cleaning.
Our national motto is "Dieu et mon
droit" ("God and my right") though most real English people will tell you that it actually is "I'm not
racist, but...".
And that's that then. Admes, feel free to
act like a child.
'YAY!!!'
'WHEEEEEEEEE!'
Cute kid. We now have four days of
this before he turns teen and stops
lagging up the lot.
I'm not cruel or callous. I just want
to get the job done.
Creativity.
The four corners of England are:
Most northerly point: Marshall
Meadows, Northumberland
Most southerly point: Lizard Point,
Cornwall Most easterly point:
Lowestoft Ness, Suffolk
Most westerly point: Land's End,
Cornwall
BEES!!
Bored, I sent Klaus and Admes hiking,
and they bring back a swarm of bees!
LOL!
'Quick son! Grab my plumbob! We'll
float away!!'
Logic.
The word "England" derives from "Land
of the Angles", referring to the
Germanic tribe from Angeln that called
England it's home at some point in the
past. Vikings, basically. Vikings
named us.
Charisma.
"The Heptarchy were the seven kingdoms
that ruled Anglo-Saxon England for
three hundred years until Wessex gained
supremacy around AD 829:
East Anglia, Essex, Kent, Mercia,
Northumbria*, Sussex and Wessex.
*Northumbria was divided for the most part into two waring kingdoms, Deira and
Bernicia."
'Daddy, this being a kid and having fun
isn't as fun as I though it would be. I
miss skilling.'
'I know what you mean.'
*eye roll* Sims.
Okay, another quad birthday. You know
the drill. Post makeover pics only.
The adorable Beetroot.
Trixie grew into her looks wonderfully.
Still handsome, it's Brian.
And Bennie surprised me by coming out as,
in my opinion, the cutest kid so far. He was a weird looking
toddler, but look now!
'Cheers Alice. Can I skill now?'
Not quite yet. One more birthday.
Yeah, the whole family assembles for
Carrie's birthday. Even Regina, who
was at work for the other four.
WOOT!
Shy little thing, but so cute. Carrie is a
knock out, and with ten nice points is
bound to be a little sweetheart.
Here it ends for now. See you next time for
more nooboo based "fun".
L-R, B-F it's Klaus, Carrie, Regina,
Bennie, Admes, Beetroor, Trixie and
Brian.
Points are as follows:
Dream Dates: 4 (4 points)
Maxed Skills: 11 (33 points)
A+ Report Cards: 1 (0.5 points)
Good Birthday Count: 5 (5 points) LTWs: 1 (3 points)
Family Friends: 10 (5 points)
Total : 50.5