My Own Light

8/2/2019 My Own Light

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I woke up to the sound of the door opening and smiled up at Martha.

Good morning Martha.

Good morning Light, did you sleep alright?I rolled my eyes. We went on like this every morning and every morning we both said the

same thing.

I had known Martha for about a year now and she was definitely one of my favourite nurses.I also always ignored that question, Did you sleep alright?. I hated when people wined and I

didnt want to have to explain, again, that I couldnt sleep.unless heavily drugged. Then there

were the nightmares. I always asked Martha to get me up early before I started screaming and

crying while asleep I didnt want to frighten anyone who might hear me.Is Miss May up yet?

Martha simply smiled, Go get somebreakfast honey and Ill come get you when she wakes up.I hugged her, gave her a kiss on the cheek and made my bed before leaving the room. My room

was light teal with light purple curtains that were translucent. My bed had a poka-dot comforter,

and my floor was rug just in case I fell out of bed again and would have something softer to land

on. I didnt have many possessions except my sets of paint and canvases with my wall covered

with previous works, my few pieces of clothing in the small dresser and my penguin Miss Maybought me when I turned 13. I did have a locket around my neck with a mother of pearl heart on

the silver locket. In it I didnt have any pictures but it did have an inscription.

There are times to be brave

While you are scared

Times to plan ahead

While you feel un prepared

Times to run, Times to hide

While keeping friends close beside

Hang on little firefly

And good luck

Of course I had no Idea what most of it meant but for some reason it just brought me joy. I

adored my locket and I would be damned if anything ever happened to it.I shot Miss Martha one more smile before heading out into the hall. Miss Martha was a

plump little women, somewhere between her 40s and 50s and she was always cheerful and

polite, unless someone steals her morning Activia. Yes I know, some people have tea, somepeople have coffee, but Miss Martha ate her Activia like it was going out of fashion and if you

wanted to live then you knew not to touch it. She had crazy curly brown hair graying only

slightly cut to her shoulders and she had glasses that hung on the side of her dress off the collar

so she wouldnt have to wear them at all times.

The halls were always empty but what would you expect for 5 oclock in the morning.

I knew my way around here so well that I could do it blindfolded but new people got lost all

the time, even with people trying to show them around. The building was just extremely largewith a lot of different corridors that all tended to look the same. On every corridor were about 30

rooms and I didnt even want to try counting the number of corridors. The only way to tell were

by the names on the room.In order to get to the cafeteria you had to take a left at Stephanie Carters walk down a few

rows past Henry Denton, and then take another left at Candice Evens and three doors down was

the Caf. And that wasnt nearly as complicated as trying to get to the front office. This place was


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like a maze and we were the little rats inside the maze. If we found our way out all they had to do

was move us to the other side of the building and youd have to start all over again.I went in and just got a small bowl of raspberries and strawberries to eat for breakfast.

Martha always unlocked the door for me when she got in so I wouldnt have to wait three hours

to get something to eat. Martha was a strong believer in nutrition and was like those cute little

old Italian ladies who shoveled seconds and thirds on to your plate when you already swore youwere full.

When I finished I tracked down Stuart in the front office and got mail for every body. I was

bored in the mornings so I offered to do small jobs around the institute until everyone got up.Mail was probably one of my favourites because whenever we had new comers I always had a

way to introduce myself and see a little bit about them.

After the mail was done I went back to my room and cleaned it a little then got some clothsout of the drawer and went to go shower. I never took long showers because people tended to get

real uncivilized when there was no hot water left and there was a lot of people here.

I wrapped myself in a towel and started brushing my hair. It was dark now because it was

wet but when it dried it was light brown with heavy undertones of red and gold. It was also long

because we didnt exactly get monthly hair cuts around here and I wouldnt do it when people dostop by. I love my hair, how its silky smooth and how it only ringlets at bottom and straight the

rest of the way up.I changed into my usual white shirt with multicolored skirt, black leggings and converse.

The colour of the skirt depended on my mood so today it was a softer pink. It was calmer,

childlike, with a little bit of fun thrown in.As soon as I was done Martha came back in and told me Miss May was up. I quickly went to

go get her morning tea and croissant and then knocked three times before I let myself in.

Good Morning, I said cheerfully as I set the tray on her bedside table.

Oh good morning Light, will you sing for me today?I went to go hug her gently around the shoulders.

Of course Miss May. I would always sing for you. I answered she got comfortable in her chair

with her tea and sat patiently while I found the perfect song for today.

Your not alone, together we stand,

Ill be by your side, You know Ill take your hand,

When it gets cold, and it feels like the end,

When theres no place to go you know I wont give in

Miss May is a sweet old lady who is turning 79 this year. She is the only person whos beenhere longer than I have and for some reason she always likes to hear me sing. Before that I used

to read to her and she has always been my best and favourite company here. She always offers to

give me things but the only thing I ever excepted was that penguin it was just way to darncute.

I sang to her everyday and every day she would close her eyes and smile. I didnt really think

my singing voice was very impressive, it wasnt like I could belt it like those singers on theradio. If I had to describe my voice with a word : sweet. But since it was Miss May who was

listening then it didnt seem to really matter ( I didnt think she listened to those pop singers

anyway).When I was done I heard applause coming from behind me and looked up to see Jared

leaning against the doorway. He greeted us both with a good morning, and then went to go sit

next to Miss May.


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I didnt know we were having a concert. So what are you singing next?

I rolled my eyes and laughed. He knew I did this every morning but he usually missed itbecause he was sleeping in.

Hush child, give the poor girl a break Unless she wants to sing something else?

I smiled and went through the book again.

When I find myself in times of trouble,Mother marry comes to me,

Speaking words of wisdom,

Let it be, and in my hour of darkness,She is standing right in front of me,

Speaking words of wisdom, Let it be

After I was done they both applauded and I laughed and went to sit on the bed next to Jared.

Your turn, I announced pushing him up from the bed.

You want meto sing? He asked like I was crazy. I shook my head.

You can do whatever you want, can you dance?

No. Can you juggle?

No.

Can you burp the alphabet?

As intriguing as that sounds, no.

So what can you do?

He thought for a minute, Ican do the erubics cube in under a minute.

Now this we got to see, someone find an erubics cube! He rolled his eyes.

I have one in my room, wait here, he said.

I smiled wickedly and glanced at Miss May, How do you think he would react if we happened

to be missing when

Miss May laughed. Girl, you can be such a little schemer sometimes.

I was jokingmostly. Hey why dont you do something?

I can take my teeth out

Ewww on second thought lets wait for Jared.

No need to wait, your entertainer has returned, he announced walking through the door with

an erubics cube.It took him about 50 seconds to solve it and Miss May and I clapped and smiled.

Has everyone eaten? she asked around.

I nodded and Jared looked guilty. Jared.

Alright Im going, I just didnt want to miss the concert.

Concerts over young man now scoot. Miss May said firmly.He smiled at me sheepishly and left.

How did you sleep last night Miss May?

Quite nicely thanks to you dear. Its hard to have night mares surrounded by so many beautiful

works of art.

I smiled. She always complemented me on everything.Her walls were covered with paintings I had given her of meadows and flowers and butterflies.

You could see that she missed outside but here, nobody went outside. It was unheard of.

Sometimes flowers and such were brought in though, and those were the things I painted.


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Whenever I can I always try to request a couple of Daffodils for Miss May to put on the little

table by her window.

Miss May is the person whos stayed here the longest length of time and the only one Iveknown for my whole life. She was one of those people that were around every Birthday and

Christmas and never forgot or needed reminding. My sixteenth Birthday was coming up in a

week and Miss May reminded me every day. Sweet sixteen and never been kissed. For mostpeople this seemed like an impossibility, for me, it couldnt be more accurate. Not that I had a

problem with that though. My life was easy, routine, and I had no desire to change that with silly

complicationslike boys.

I had a few friends here. Jared was becoming close and hed only been here for about amonth. I also had Elizabeth, Jeremy, Joey, and Melissa who had been here for about a year and

each one was a great person. Jeremy was sweet, Liza (Elizabeth) was a laugh, Joey was silly,and Melissa was so much like me it was scary. We call each other twins all the time though it is

obvious to every one that were not related. I guess some people would compare our little groupshere like clicks in high school. Since Ive never been to school I cant be sure though. But even if

everyone wasnt friends with everyone, there were no enemies. No one was here long enough to

truly hate someone else, no one even had the energy to hate other people, and no body ever didanything to be hated for. I had other people that I would smile with and inquire about there

health and things but I never saw them on a daily bases.Miss May and I had tea, played board games and chatted for a while.

Light?

Yes, I answered, wondering about the serious look on her face.

Youve been here for too long sweetie. Your almost a grown young women and youve nevereven been outside before.

Its okay Miss May, you know I dont mind. Do the best you can with what you have and all

that. I said smiling at her she smiled back before it became sad.

Would you promise me something? she asked.

Anything.

If you ever have the chance to leave I want you to run from here and never come back. Run

with others if you can and leave everything else behind.

But Miss May, what about you?

Im old honey, Ive seen the outside world and Ive lived my live. So Ill stay here and be

happy about. Of course I will miss you but it would put my heart at ease to know your far away

from here. I couldnt say anything. She wanted me to leave and never come back. Part of mewas overwhelmed that she cared for me enough to want all this for me but a tiny part was hurt

that she didnt want me here anymore. I know it was silly and she was only thinking about whatwas best for me.

You need to promise me Light.

I sighed in defeat, I promise.

She smiled at that and finished her tea, it was time for her nap so I gave her a hug and gentlyshut the door behind me. At least I knew I would never have to live up to that promise. It was

literally impossible to get out of here and thats with people that have it planned in advance, so I

highly doubt such an opportunity would ever simply appear like magic.I walked into the rec room where my friends usually hung out and joined my twin (Melissa)

on the couch while Liza, Jeremy, Joey, and Jared were all playing super smash bros and seemed

to be in an epic battle. Though Liza was realistically not involved in the battle because most of


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her deaths consisted of accidents and she was on the opposite side of the screen from the

fighting. We all talked while they played and waited to be called in for evaluation. Evaluationwas something that went on every day when a psychiatrist and a doctor ask you questions and

gave you a checkup. Things rarely happened where there was something unusual so nobody ever

worried about it except for the newcomers every once in a while. They would ask us how we

were feeling, what foods we were eating if we had any difficulties with other patients and thenassign us our daily vitamins for any nutrients they didnt think we were getting enough of. I

didnt like meat and have been a vegetarian my whole life so I had a lot of Iron pills. Everyone

took there pills everyday as promised.This facility is an experimentation lab studying the effects of healthy living and positive

influence from others around us. That being that even if we had anyone around that had a

problem with the others they would be removed being considered a threat to the study. Mostpeople end up here as free foster care, orphans, or every once in a way one that the parents just

cant deal with. Miss May was here for the health benefits of her condition. Refusing to takenormal treatment due to her illness she stays here where people can look after her 24/7. Why am

I here? Ive been asking myself that for a long time. Ive been here since before I can remember,

no record of parents, or any sort of past history. In short, I dont know who I am. The institutegave me my name suggested by Miss May and a nice nurse who worked here at the time named

Gloria.Most of my friends were a mixture of those things and Jared was the rare case of being

dropped off by his parents and left. He doesnt seem to know why and its not really anyones

business to ask so Jared is also a bit of a mystery.When it was time for me to be questioned the doctor simply said that I looked a bit pale and

suggested I have a short nap in the afternoon and an Iron pill. I simply nodded and went out to

find Jared was in after me. He ruffled my hair as I went by and I glared up at him. He smirked

and called a see you later before entering the room. I hated it when people treated me like a kid.

I wasnt that small only 52 and it wasnt likely I would grow much more than that anyway.

Jared was way tall definitely over 60, with messy black hair and light blue eyes. He liked to

tease me about my height but it was always just playful and never meant to truly hurt my feelings

or anything.Most of the time I listened to the doctor and if he said to go get some sleep I would. When I

woke I did my independent study on courses that I would have taken had I been in school and

then usually it was dinner in the Cafeteria, hanging out some more with my friends. Sometimeswe went to the gym and played sports, other times we just hung around and acted lazy like we

did today. At around 9 it was time fore bed, and this is the way it went everyday.

I took my sleeping pills as normal and also as normal didnt sleep well at all. Thenightmares tended to get more and more gruesome until I started to hear screaming and bolted

right up in bed breathing and looking around. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary until I heard

the scream again and recognizing the voice, I shot from bed and flew out the door. I paused after

I was out the door in amazement. Everyones room got locked automatically every night and

werent opened till either the automatic unlock at 7 am or until one of the nurses came to let you

out. In other words there was no way I just walked right out of it the way I did unless someone

unlocked me, but no one would do that at my goodness, 3:05 Am! The screaming jolted meout of my temporary amazement and I noticed it coming from the person across the hall. It was

Mary- Anne. Mary-Anne had been here less then a month and was quite young. I went across the

hall and tugged on the doorknob expecting it to be locked, but I was wrong again. The door


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easily clicked open and the screaming got louder as I opened the door.

I blinked as all the technology in the room was going haywire. The lights were flickering onand off, a radio was blasting music that could just be heard over Mary- Annes screaming, andthe fan above her head was swinging so fast it was going to fall off its hinges. Mary-Anne was

huddled in the corner and by now had passed the screaming stage and was balling

uncontrollably.I tried to call her but she didnt seem to hear me.

Mary-Anne! I screamed and she looked up slightly as I tried to motion her out of the room

before the flan flew off the ceiling.

Mary-Anne get over here now!

She gulped and ran for her life barely making it out the door before the fan finally broke free

and hit the wall with such force that it blades broke off and it left a giant whole in it. I tried tocalm Mary-Anne seeing as she was most likely in shock and definitely hysterical but I was

definitely surprised at the very least to be much help. After about a minute footsteps started

clattering down the hall and a few minutes after that a group of nurses and a couple of men in

security uniforms rushed towards us.

What Happened, they demanded. Being the only non hysterical witness present I guessed Iwould have to answer that.

I heard screaming so I ran across the hall and Marry-Annes radio and lights were acting uplike some kind of earthquake or something and her fan broke off the ceiling and exploded against

the wall!, I blurted out. Okay, so I was a little hysterical but that was some crazy stuff going on

right there.The man looked at me like I was on either two much medication or possibly not enough

medication.

Itstrue, chirped Mary-Anne still slightly hysterical but at least coherent. I was having a

nightmare and when I woke up everything was crazy and really loud and then the ceiling fanstarted going crazy and it felt really cold and then Light opened the door and we just made it out

before the fan smashed and . and that was as much as you were going to get out of her.

The guards still looked a little unsure but the nurses ran over to us and took Mary-Anne

away somewhere trying to calm her down. I was pretty calm right now, or at least I appearedcalm so they opened the door to my room and let me back in, locking it behind them. I went over

to the bed, curled up but definitely couldnt sleep this time. I mean what had just happened? I

lay there going over all the possibilities until I couldnt stand it anymore. I got up grabbed my

paints and started painting. A tree, a cat, it didnt matter I just didnt want to have to think rightnow. I did that until morning came and Martha came in and told me that some of the guards had

some more questions for me later on so I should try to get some sleep now.

But I didnt feel tired, I felt restless. Like I had slept too long and had too much to do. She

didnt push it but reminded me to stop by the front hall later on and to check to see how Miss

May was today.

I was on my way to the front hall first when someone threw themselves at me and I wastackled and spun around before they put me back down,

OMG Twin are you okay? I heard what happened, well bits and pieces anyway and someone

said you almost had your head chopped off by a ceiling fan! She screeched.I rolled my eyes. Mel was known to exaggerate sometimes but I had a strong feeling that this

story had been warped way before Mel could get to it. But what can I say? Were a bunch of

teenagers stuck in a place with routines and order. When something finally happens its in our


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very nature to gossip about it.

She was still clinging to me and I hugged her back. Its okay Twin really, the fan hit the

wall and didnt come close to either Mary- Anne or me. It was probably just a loose bolt or

something, I reasoned. She accepted this versions right away of course.

Oh, Okay, just be careful twin kay?

Yeah I will, I have to go talk to the front desk about what happened. Ill meet you afterwardin the front hall for breakfast.

Okay, Ill see you there.

She hopped of in the direction of her room probably hoping to get another hours more ofsleep before everyone else in the building got up. I headed towards the front room and knocked

nervously on the door. Okay I admit it the guards scare me. Its so silly but something about

them just creeps me out, whether its how they always look at everyone like theyre guilty of

something or how they act like were all going to try and bolt for the door at any minute. Ineither case they gave me creeps but it was best to get this over with.

Come in, a voice called and I opened the door. My eyes widened as I entered the room

and I froze. Mr. Darenforth was in the front desk surrounded by guards. Mr. Darenforth was the

founder of our institute and showed up every three months to check on progress. The problemwas, he was just here last month. He looked up when I entered and gestured for me to take a seat

in front of the desk.I took a seat and started twirling my hair nervously and waited for him to start.

Alright Miss Kinsley ( my last name) Can you tell us what happened at 3:00 this morning? He

said gently. My mouth was dry but I swallowed and forced myself to just spit it out.

Well I woke up when I heard screaming from across the hall so I went to go see what waswrongAnd I was interrupted.

And how did you get out of your room, it was supposed to be locked, a guard said cutting me

off. I stuttered and then swallowed restarting.

I dont know, I just tried to opening it up and it opened. I dont know why it wasnt locked.

Alright Joseph thats enough, finish telling us what happened, he said to me kindly.

I took a deep breath and continued. I went outside and noticed it was coming from across the

hall and. and I finished telling them about the light and the radio and the fan. The guards stilllooked very suspicious especially when I mentioned Mary-Annes door was unlocked as well,but they didnt interrupt me again. When I was finished Mr.

Darenforth looked like he was analyzing something but he kept the smile on his face.

Thank you Miss Kinsley, we shall call you again should we have anymore questions but for

now please remember to take your vitamins and perhaps see the psychiatrist if you feel at all

traumatized by this unfortunate experience.

Yes Mr. Darenforth. Thank you sir, I said before leaving the room struggling to go at a normal

speed when I really wanted to bolt.

After a few minutes I started to relax. I dont know what I was so stressed about. It was just

those guards and then Mr. Darenforth with his pretend kindness was somehow even more creepy.And even more than that he never made unexpected visitsever! He came every three monthsand that was it. He was the type of person with a strict schedule, always places to go and people

to see, and to have him suddenly decide to make an extended stay, obviously something waswrong.

When I felt a hand on my shoulder I jumped and turned around.

Wow easy there Light, didnt mean to scare you, said Jeremy. I sighed and cracked my neck.


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I really needed to chill out. Jeremy frowned when he saw my face.

Hey you alright? Youre really pale, he commented as he brushed his palm across myforehead. I rolled my eyes, Jeremy was always worrying about everyone.

Im fine Jeremy you worry to much. Cmon lets go meet everyone for breakfast.

I said dragging him to the Cafeteria. Mel, Liza, and Joey were already there and only Jared

was absent.I couldnt help but notice the stares as I walked to our table. Obviously everyone knew what

happened already but it still bothered me. I really dont want that kind of attention and I didnt

want anymore questions about what happenedwhich turned out pointless seeing as Liza wasbouncing up and down in her seat curiosity practically coming off of her in waves.

Are you really going to make merepeat it...again? I sighed.

Well it would be nice to have an accurate account of what happened. Now people are starting

to say that one of you set the room on fire and trashed the fan in a fit of rage.

I choked a little on the drink I had justpicked up. I mean come on, there wasnt fire involvedat all or fits of rage for that matter. So I had no choice but to tell them what happened,.

For a while they were all quiet, as usual Joey was the first one to break the silence.

So were you two on something last night or.Me and my twin both smacked him for that. That was not funny, though I could feel the side of

my cheek twitch on the verge smiling.

Thats not funny Joey, both Light and Mary-Anne could have been seriously injured. It was

probably just some manufacturing problem with the ceiling fan and a dying bulb making the

lights flicker. Theres absolutely nothing to worry about, said Mel, forever the optimist, thoughI had to agree that this seemed the most logical explanation. The chances though that there was a

problem with the radio, the lights, and the fan all at the same time? No stop it, I thought

mentally shaking myself, your definitely over thinking this, I thought to myself. On the outside

everyone appeared to agree but in everyones eyes I saw that one flicker of doubt, the thoughtthat this was more than what it appeared to be. We all jolted out of it as soon as Jared came to sit

down.

Whats everyone talking about? he asked. We all looked at him as if he was from Mars, was

there a possibility he didnt know?

Dude didnt you hear? asked Jeremy looking confused.

Didnt know what? What happened? I couldnt help it, I burst out laughing and my twin

joined in.

Thats Jared for you, ignoring the gossip, we said in between giggles.

He shrugged, Why would I listen to it? By the time it reaches the honest people its pretty

much all made up anyway.

Well it still lets you know something happened either way. You cant just go around with

your head in the

Are you going to tell me what happened or not? he interrupted bored.

Light was attacked by a ceiling fan, said Liza matter-o-factly. He jumped up shocked.

She what??!! He practically shouted. I shushed him and pulled him pack into his chair.

Thanks a lot Liza, I said sarcastically. She could be just as bad a gossiper as anyone

sometimes.

Seriously Jared calm down. Shes seriously exaggerating. and for hopefully the last time thatday I told Jared what happened. When I was done he shook his head.

You really shouldnt have gotten involved Light. You could have gotten in trouble for leaving


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your room or hurt when the fan broke off.

Ha thats rich! Admit it, if you were in that situation you would have done the same thing that I

did, I commented turning my water bottle upside down ( I know this seems random but its justanother one of my odd habits that I picked up from my A.D.D). He had no response to that like I

thought. Jared wasnt the type of person to stand back when someone was in trouble. Its just one

of those instinctual things that you have no choice over. But your okay though right? He asked to make sure.

Im fine, I assured him standing up. But I am hungry. Anybody want anything?

A couple of them asked for drinks so I went up to get in line. It didnt surprise me that Jared

came with me though it did confuse me. It didnt take two people to carry a sandwich and acouple of drinks but Id noticed lately that Jared had been hanging around me a lot. Being the

first person he had met upon arriving Id guessed he was simply sticking to me because he wasthe type of person that needed to attach themselves to others for comfort. Being close to me

made sure he always had a friend around, someone to ask for advice and someone to give advice

to whenever we needed it, especially in such a strange place as this.

After breakfast we went to the gym to play Dodge ball, playing rock paper scissors to pick

teams. It was always a very fair way to decide and it always made the teams interesting. Most ofthe time Mel and me ended up on the same team and we would always keep more to the back so

it would be more difficult to hit us and as usual were the last two left on our team, and thatsusually when the game is over anyway so we gave up.

After that I had almost forgotten to check on Miss May. I was rushing to her room when I

noticed the floor was slippery. I almost fell down when I caught myself on a door knob and thenfrowned confused. The floor was absolutely soaked and it was all coming from underneath the

door of Jake Harleys room. Oh my god!

I immediately grabbed the door knob and tried to open it but it was locked. Please let him

not be in there, please let him not be in there! I repeated as I ran to the guards.

Somethings floodingcoming from Jakes door, he could be in trouble! I gasped morefrom panic then from being tired from running.

The guard looked confused unsure whether to believe me or not but followed me back to his

room and tried the knob. He frowned, got out a master key and quickly pushed it through andopen the door. The water came pouring out into the hall and I really should have thought to stand

back before I got soaked. After most of the danger was over I carefully walked into the room and

saw Jake on the floor. I ran over and was about to check his breathing when he coughed andspluttered, getting into a sitting position and blinked looking around confused.

What the hell just happened!? He shouted.

Do you remember anything? How did this much water even get into your room anyway?

How the hell should I know? I just went to sleep last night and woke up just now soaked and

pissed off.I felt something cold on my cheek and looked up at the vent as it dripped water.

Well that was strange I didnt think the water had reached that high, unless

I think the water came through the vent, I said pointing up.

Jake looked up and scowled. I cant fucking believe this. Someones trying to fucking kill

me. I cant even..He was cut off as something flew into his arm. He looked at it confused then his eyes rolled

back into his head and he collapsed. I screamed but the guard put his hand over my mouth.

Hes just unconscious, calm down and go tell the office what happened. he grumbled. I nodded


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looking back to see a needle sticking out if his arm. I shivered but did what he told me scared I

would be the next one unconscious if I put up a fight.I carefully left not wanting to slip on the floor and then ran when the floor was dry.

I knocked on the office door my body shaking and only just realizing how cold I was from being

drenched. I wrapped my arms around myself as the Office door opened. The main nurse (whos

name I never seem to remember) looked me up and down raising her eyebrows. Th..th.theres app..pproblem in Jakes room 2 h..h..halls down. A guard is already th th..there and asked me to go

get help. I stuttered my teeth starting to chatter.

She nodded her face going all business like. She pointed me to a chair while she ran out ofgoing to get more guards, I shivered for a few minutes until she came back and wrapped me in a

blanket.

There you go dear. Just wait here a little longer so you can talk to Mr. Darenforth, then you cango and shower and put on nice warm cloths. I nodded not happy at all about talking to Mr.

Darenforth again. Screw it, next time Ill ignore that stupid voice telling me to go poking mynose where it doesnt belong. Okay I wont but not the point. Why on earth is all this

happening around me, talk about being at the wrong place at the wrong time. I was still shivering

trying to rap the blanket tighter around myself when the nurse picked up her phone. Yes rightaway Sir. she answered. She put it down and nodded over to me.

Mr. Darenforth is ready to see you now. Hes in the office three doors down.I nodded my thanks and quickly stood and even though some part off me told me to leave the

blanket I wrapped it tighter around myself. I was just too cold, if they wanted this blanket they

would have to take it from me forcefully or I might freeze before I made it to my shower.I scuttled down the hall with a feeling of dread slowly creeping up my spine. I really had to

get over this silly paranoia, there was nothing wrong with Mr. Darenforth and the guards, heck

one even saved Jake just a few minutes ago. But I still couldnt help the grimace that came over

my face before I plastered on a look of confidence and entered the office.Mr. Darenforth stood as I came inside.

Ah Light, I hope you dont mind but we are going to go for a short walk as we talk. Follow me

please, He said leaving out a different door than I had come in. This was a different part of the

institute, leading to. I really didnt know actually, but apparently I was about to find out. We

walked for a few minutes before the halls started to get dark. Mr. Darenforth still hadnt saidanything, nor did any of the guards flanking us.

Sir where are we going? I asked hesitantly. He simply sighed seeming to be ignoring me andeven when he spoke he did not answer my question.

What a mess. Two bad eggs already, out of a the newest batch. Already poisoning some of the

older members. We have been letting go of your minor breaches for a long time Light but now

Im afraid you have crossed a line. He said sadly.

Ice shot up my spine and my face paled. W..wh what are y..yo..you talking about, Istuttered positive I had heard him wrong.

My child I know every girl your age craves attention but the extremes you have gone to are notat all healthy. First attempting to seduce boys, at your age why its simply unheard of. And then

attempting the murder of Mary-Anne and Jake, just so you could rescue them and claim hero is

just proof of the deterioration of your mental health. He kept on talking as if he was simply

telling me off for cheating on someone elses test.I stood frozen no longer able to walk as my mouth popped open. I almost felt like laughing

this was just too ridiculous. This had to be some sort of jokeright?


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First he accused me of being some sort of slut, then he accused me of trying to kill two people

just for attention?

What on earth are you talking about? Seducing boys? Planning conspiracy murders? This is

just crazy! I practically screamed at him.

Now, now, dear I know youve been confused for a long time but were going to get you some

help, he said trying to sound assuring. I always knew this guy creeps me out but I never knewhe was freaking crazy! And this guy runs this whole company? How the heck did that ever

happen? I was started to hyperventilate and now the guards started to drag me forward as I still

wouldnt walk. As we walked forward the lighting got worse and worse until it almost lookedlike we were in a cave with lantern-like- things hanging from the ceiling too far apart to give

much light. After a bit we stopped seeming to find our destination. I started shaking from fear

this time as I looked at the completely dark room in front of us and guessed what they had inmind. I was terrified of the dark, by the way. I turned to Mr. Darenforth with wide eyes in my

last attempt.

Please, Mr. Darenforth I would never hurt anybody, I swear! Please dont do this I dont I

cant. And then it became too much and I started crying.

Mr. Darenforth sighed dramatically. Dont make this any more difficult then it needs to be. You need to be punished for your

actions. Once you realize what youve done wrong you can come out. He said gently. I snifflednot believing a word he said as a guard went up to unlock the door and the other one started to

drag me inside it. My heart started to beat faster and faster until I was sure everyone could hear

it. NO!!!!!!! I screamed terrified as he let go and left locking the door quickly behind him. Iwas still shivering, still cold but that was the least of my worries at the moment. I stood staring at

the door too terrified to turn around and stare at the never ending darkness behind me. I couldnt

tell you how long I stood there. It could have been seconds, minutes, hours, days, but the last one

seemed like too much of an exaggerationmost likely.After a while I thought I was going to go crazy. Would they feed me? Was this a death

sentence or just a permanent sentence. I couldnt decide. Would people notice I was gone? What

would they think of my sudden disappearance? Would Mr. Darenforth tell everyone that he

thought me responsible for all the things that were happening? What about the person really

behind it? If I staid here would that mean the end for the next victim, because I wasnt there tohelp them?

I had so many questions but if the answer to the first one was yes than it wouldnt matter

because I wouldnt be here long enough for any of those things to really make a difference.* * *

After a while I got an answer to a few of my questions actually. They did come around oncea day to give me some food. Nothing gourmet just some bread and some soup.

And I was pretty sure I would never get out of here. After three days I was positive I was going

to lose my mind. Go just as crazy as they had accused me of being. So I did the only thing I

knew to comfort myself, I sang.

Black bird singing in the dead of night,

Take these broken wings and learn to fly,All my life,

You were always waiting for this moment to arrive,

Blackbird fly, Blackbird fly,


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Into the light of the black night,

As I sang my heart beat finally slowed. I forgot about the darkness, the fear, the doubt, and

the questions as I focused on the words, the sorrow of the song itself, and I let it flow through me

leaving my own troubles, even temporarily, behind.

I sang everyday until my throat hurt and I practically lost my voice, but it was worth it. WhenI sang I didnt think, I felt. I felt the emotions of the song, of the person who wrote the song,

what they were thinking about as they poured their soul out on paper. My own troubles took

somewhat of a back seat and I could finally focus. As I sang I clutched my hand to my necklaceand automatically turned it over to read the back.

Never give up hope.

I stopped singing and reread the words. But what hope was there to hold onto to? I am a normal,albeit small, human girl of 15 years. How the heck was I supposed to fix anything? I had no

tools, Im afraid of the dark, and I was cold and hungry and terrified. And what about everyone

else that is down here. If some miracle happened and I had a chance to run could I leave them

behind with the chance that they were as innocent as I was?

All this negative thinking was making me sick again so I sang and sang and sang until I gottired, curled into a ball, and had a nap.

I only had naps, too paranoid of what was around me to give myself over completely to

sleep. And of course I wouldnt have been able to anyway without my sleeping pills.The dreams were no better than usual only possibly more terrifying and vivid than normal. Every

time I awoke I was never in the same position as I was when I fell asleep, showing I had tossedand turned. This time when I woke up there was a little more light in the hall then normal. I

frowned getting up and walking to the bars of the door looking up the side of the hall. Someone

was definitely coming, though the glow from the flash light hid any specific features. But only

one person I knew walked through this hallway freely, and sure enough when they got closeenough I could see two guards trailing none other than Mr. Darenforth.

I backed up from the door a meter or two and put on a face devoid of any expression. Most

likely they werent coming here for me anyway. A couple times already there had been the awful

sound of people screaming and begging and crying and the sound of scuffing as people gotdragged down through the hall and into their new room. I wondered exactly how many were

down here but I sincerely hoped it wasnt any more than those I had seen on my way down here.

Unexpectedly, the three of them stopped at my door and a guard stepped forward. Heunlocked the door and held it open for Mr. Darenforth and the other guard. I kept my face neutral

but could not stop myself from shaking. But at least if they noticed I could claim it was because

of the cold. I was still wearing the same thing from when they put me in here. That being my t-shirt, a multicolored skirt ( at the time my emotions were too all over the place to pick one

colour), my black leggings, and plaid converse.

I didnt even want to think about what my hair, or my face for that matter, looked like but as

soon as they came in I was too nervous to care. What if they thought I was still nuts and I wasntgetting any better? What if they thought it was best that I be dealt with permanently? I mean

what was the point of keeping me down here, nothing was being accomplished.

So what doyou have to say? Do you think you can behave yourself now? he said strictly. Ifroze opening my mouth for a second but then snapping it shut.

Behave myself? Hes acting like Im a five year old who pushed a classmate into the sand box.

I also didnt have anything to say. I had questions but this guy was too psycho to actually give


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me a rational answer. In this situation it was best just to hold my tongue and hope they didnt get

violent.I nodded slowly, mentally gluing my mouth shut and willing it to stay that way.

Good , good, he said smiling before his face turned scolding. But you must understand the

severity of your actions. Therefore as your punishment You are no longer allowed to speak. He

said. I frowned thinking Id misunderstood. Not allowed to speak. Does he mean for a little whileor ever? I wonder how he plans for me to interact with others, unless, unless thats the point.

This whole things is just another way for him to separate me from the others.

Do you understand? Ifyou say one word we will have to put you back down here for another

week. He said faking sadness and regret.

I was pretty sure he was crazy. Which meant that if he said no speaking I had to agree. No

way was I coming back down here for another week? Ive been down here for a week! It tookme a few minutes to digest that before I looked up at Mr. Darenforth who was looking at me

expectantly. So I nodded, and as if sensing my acquiesce he smiled and nodded to one of the

guards. The guard opened the door and my heart started to beat faster. I was really getting out of

here. They were letting me out! I felt like yelling and screaming in relief but I also felt like my

deal was now imprinted in to my skin. I was now incapable of going against my orders, knowingthe consequences if I disobeyed.

I guess having been faced with this I realized how sheltered Ive been. Ive never had to worryabout fending for myself, getting myself out of anything. I was ashamed of how I handled it

closing myself off like that, unable to face the reality of my situation. It was then and there as we

walked through the halls slowly inching towards light, that I swore to myself I would learn how

to fend for myself. I wouldnt be some helpless little girl (no pun intended on my size). Some

how I wanted to prove to myself that I was stronger than this.

I was nervous and still shivering like crazy while we walked. No one said anything and the

hall way seemed to just get longer and longer while we walked never allowing us to reach theend. I tried to keep my head knowing that as long as I did as was told I had nothing to worry

about. But I still worried, paranoid because I couldnt tell where he was going with all this no

speaking stuff. His brain didnt work right making his intentions and actions unpredictable.

When we made it back to the hallway with regular lighting I had to put my hand over my eyesto protect them from the light. I had been in near darkness for just over a week, my eyes were

going to need some time to adjust. I blinked as we walked, slowly removing my hand from my

eyes. I had never before noticed how blank and white the walls were before. It was supposed tobe therapeutic but now it just seemed to creep me out. There was no life here. No colour on the

walls or floor, no art or decoration, no sign that people or even children lived here. The reason I

never noticed it before was because this was what I grew up with. No one went around markingdown your height on the wall as you grew. Everything had to be completely sterilized and plain,

everything polished and scrubbed down to the last tiny grain of dirt on the floor. You never saw

papers laying around or garbage on the floor. And when you live so long like this you barely

even notice it. But now for some reason its like I could finally see past these walls to the factthat there was something horribly wrong with this place.

At one point Mr. Darenforth and one of the guards left for the office giving a final farewell

and a warning of our agreement. The last Guard escorted me to my room unlocked the door, andlet me in closing it and relocking it behind me. I stared at the closed door for a while before

turning and looking at my room. It was just as I remembered it with all my painting still on the

walls and the clutter of paints and books strewn about. I marveled in the colour and life in the


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room for only a little bit before going over grabbing my pajamas from the closet and going into

my on suite bathroom. It wasnt some amazing luxurious bathroom with a jet tub or anything butto me right now the little shower seemed like the most luxurious thing in the world. While I was

down there, there wasnt a bathroom but a tiny toilet in the corner of the cell. It was anything like

clean or private so letsjust say Id never appreciated a bathroom more.

I stepped into the shower turning the faucet and letting scalding hot water pound into myskin. I didnt care though and realistically it probably wasnt that hot. It only felt scolding

because my skin was so cold. I stood there for a long time with my eyes closed and barely

noticed when tears started mixing in with the water that streamed down my face. Once the hotwater started to turn cool I turned off the water and stepped out quickly putting my fuzzy

pajamas on. They had little cupcakes all over them and they were blue.

As I rubbed my towel over my face I was just about to hang it up when I caught a look at theperson in the mirror. I froze before realizing the impossible.

That person was me.

She had white skin, her normally bright turquoise eyes looked dull with black shadows

underneath. Her lips were chapped and her natural blush looked fake. This person was me, but

she also wasnt me. Just because I never went out into the sun didnt mean Idont usually have alittle more colour than tofu. Just because I had nightmares didnt mean that I always had circles

under my eyes. Just because some people would say I hadnt really lived didnt mean I normallylooked so dead.

The mirror was making me melancholic so I went back into my room and laid down on the

bed, wrapping the blanket around me to preserve what little warmth my body was able to get

from the hot water. I didnt sleep right away scared that when I woke up I would be back in thatroom, but after a while I convinced myself I was overreacting. So I pulled the blankets tighter

around myself curling into a ball and went to sleep.

As usual I had nightmares, but this time no one came to wake me up so they continued. I wasbeing dragged around in the dark unable to scream unable to fight back as my back smacked

against the ground. After a while it was too much and I awoke sitting up and breathing heavily. I

looked at the clock and it said 8:30. My eyes widened, I never sleep in that late. I pulled out of

bed getting my usual cloths with a black skirt to represent my mood. I pulled my hair back into apony tail which had gone curly from rolling around during the night.

I stepped outside hesitantly and went to the cafeteria which was crawling with people. And

unfortunately I didnt go unnoticed. People stared at me like they were seeing a ghost. But then

again I probably looked like one so I couldnt blame them. So I tried to ignore the looks andwent and got a fruit cup nodding to the lunch lady and then leaving the room. Walking and

ignoring the stares was one thing. Trying to sit long enough to eat and ignore them was another.Of course as soon as I left I ran into Jared. He looked absolutely shocked to see me and for a

second he said nothing. Then a huge grin spread across his face and he reached forward.

Oh my god L! Its a miracle, he said pulling me into a hug he squeezed the heck out of me for

a bit and I laughed internally at his enthusiasm. I was of course extremely glad to see him too butunderneath my mood was still as dark as my skirt, enabling me to be happy for any long length

of time. He pulled away holding me at arms length.

So where were you! I mean one minute your playing doge ball and the next your gone. Youdidnt try to escape did you? he said looking grim.

I just shook my head unable to look in his eyes.

Well than what were you doing? He said exasperated as to why I hadnt told him everything


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yet. I opened my mouth for a second on a small desire to just spill everything but the next second

I snapped my mouth shut and looked away. Jared frowned realizing something was wrong.

Light, whats up? Are you okay? I mean shit you look really pale and shaky.

I sighed. Thanks so much for the comment, I thought sarcastically but I only shook my head

taking his hand and leading him away from the cafeteria. Once no one was around I turned to

him miming talking and then shaking my head. Your not speaking? he asked completely shocked by this turn of events. Usually you couldnt

get me to close my mouth once I got babbling. So even though he looked like he doubted I could

go without speaking he still frowned confused as to why I would try.I nodded, answering his question before he tilted my chin up forcing me to look in his eyes

while he looked in mine, trying to find the answers in them. After a bit he sighed and let go

stepping away.

Alrightbut dont think this means Im giving up. I will find out what happened to you. he

warned. I grimaced wishing he wouldnt try. All of a sudden he got this gleam in his eyes beforeblinking it away.

You know Miss May has been very lonely while you were away and she doesnt look too

good. He said sadly.My eyes widened. Miss May! How could I forget about her. I turned around forgetting about

Jared and ran to her room . As soon as I found her I threw my arms around her.

Light? she asked surprised and relieved before she winced a little. I pulled back horrified that

I hurt her. From the look on my face she could probably guess what was on my mind.

Oh no dear, its not your fault. I just havent been feeling the best this week. she said bravely.I frowned sticking out my bottom lip. She smiled at my expression.

Would you sing to me sweet heart? I opened my mouth again and closed it as water started in

my eyes. Did singing count as talking? I really wanted to sing, it always seemed to make Miss

May feel so much better whenever she had one of her days, when the illness was worse. And thiswas Miss May here. I owed her so much surely I should do this one thing. She was about to say

something when I held up one finger telling her to give me a minute. I went to the door and

closed it so no one else would hear me. I returned and sat by Miss Mat holding her hand. I closed

my eyes and took one deep breath to calm myself down.

Look at me, you may thing you see who I really am,

But youll never know me, everyday, its as if I play, a part,

Now I see, If I wear a mask I can fool the world, but I cannot fool my heart,Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me,

Why is my reflection someone I dont know,

Some how I cannot hide, who I am, though Ive tried,

When will my reflection show, who I am inside,.

I sang softly and quietly hoping no one else heard that. When I opened my eyes Miss May

was smiling and I was surprised at how much better she looked. Already she didnt have to lean

as much for support and she looked steadier.

That was beautiful Light, she said lightly patting my head. I smiled back at her glad that forwhatever reason my singing always seemed to help.

She chatted for a while and I listened. For whatever reason she never commented on mysilence but continued to smile and tell me about all the usual gossip ( except for the ones

undoubtedly concerning me and my disappearance). It was so nice to hear her just talking. She

was in a good mood like she is usually. Having her be so layback and cheerful it helped distract


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me from what had happened the last week. I didnt feel scared while I was here but I still had a

small part of my mind that was just waiting for them to come find me and put me back downthere, for doing another crime I did not commit.

After a while Miss May started to get tired again so I squeezed her hand, and then left so she

could have a nap. I jumped when I saw someone leaning up against the wall my heart rate going

up. So you wont talk but youll sing? Jared questioned. My eyes widened and I put my hand over

his mouth looking around to make sure no one was around to see that.

I motioned wildly for him to shut it and dragged him down the hall. I dragged him to my roomgrabbed a piece of paper and pen and started to write.

Dont you dare tell anyone I did that! I wrote furiously showing it to him. He frowned,

though still looking slightly amused at my means of communication.

And why not? he raised his eyebrows in a challenge.I sighed frustrated and flipped a page.

I just shouldnt be talking, okay? But I cant say no to miss May and you know that! I accused

silently. He shrugged unashamed that he tricked me into opening my mouth. He obviously

wondered why I was gone for so long and when I come back I wont speak? But hell wouldfreeze over before I told him what happened. How I was weak, how I left the others down there,

how I wasnt even brave enough to warn everyone that Mr. Darenforth was insane! I just knowhe would be ashamed of me but right nowI just didnt feel strong at all. I felt terrified andhungry and paranoid and ashamed.

Jared was still in my room but I sent him out. He went reluctantly and said hed see me later.I sighed again and opened up a new canvas once I had shut the door behind him.

I never knew exactly what I was going to draw once I started but I saw splashes of both

darkness and light. I knew this picture wouldnt be one of the ones full of colour. No, this one

would be made of shades with one tiny splash of colour to draw your eyes away from the

darkness. This was one of the few of my pictures that didnt have a form. There were manydesigns and swirls and things but nothing that you could actually tell what it is. The painting

wasnt something you would hang on your living room wall. But it did have a lot of depth to it.

Even I wasnt exactly sure what the meaning was but it seemed appropriate.I stayed painting for a long time before my stomach started to growl. It was around supper

time so I knew the cafeteria would be crowded and no way was I walking in there with everyone

staring at me. I couldnt keep still and ended up pacing.

I knew I couldnt stay in here. I needed to somehow ask Jared or one of the others if anything

else strange has happened since Ive been down there. I also needed to get my routine back, face

my fear, and let everyone get used to having me around again. I slowly started to walk over to

the door reaching for the door knob when I stopped. I cant do it. I turned around pacing some

more until I could hardly walk. My energy has been drained for days with neither sleep nor food

to build it back up again. I felt sick and dizzy so eventually I lay down on the bed and zoned out.

I partly zoned back in when I heard a knock on the door but I couldnt stand up. I was just

so tired, maybe if I just closed my eyes for a second.

The knock sounded again as the person on the other side got impatient. I still did nothing until

apparently their patience dried up and Mel came bursting through my door.

Really twin, you finally come back and then dont even.. She trailed off quickly but I wasbarely listening anyway as I fought my eyes to stay open. All of a sudden Mel screamed and ran

over to me. Holy crap Light you look awful. Quick we have to get you help.. But I


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summoned the last reserve of my strength and grabbed her arm shaking my head at her. I

couldnt let her get the guards because I knew the last thing they would do was help me. I shakilyreached for the pen and paper and wrote on it.

Go get Jeremy, he can help. She nodded though looked at me funny for writing it down instead

of simply saying it out loud. She rushed out the door and I tried to sit up and failed.

If I really was that sick then I knew Jeremy would be the one to help me. Out of our group hewas always the one that was health conscious. If he ever got out of here he would probably go

and become a doctor somewhere. He had the most first aid training and was always calm in times

when everyone else wasnt.

It wasnt long before my door handle turned and Mel and Jeremy came in and closed thedoor behind them. His face showed nothing but slight concern as to not let me know how bad I

probably looked. He leaned by my head checking my temperature and my breathing. His coolhand felt nice against my forehead and I closed my eyes ready to sleep.

No Light stay awake. Mel has gone to get you something to eat. I dont know how thishappened but you are extremely undernourished. Your pale as a ghost and your temperature is

scary to say the least. We have to get some food in you before we do anything else. He ordered.

I just nodded not even realizing Mel had left the room.He got a wet wash cloth and wiped it over my face and kept me company until Mel came

back. Jeremy gently propped me up as Mel put the tray of food on my lap. It was a baked potato

and garden salad with dressing, croutons, and tons of vegetables. For some reason I didnt evenfeel that hungry anymore but I knew these two had no problems with forcing it down my throat

so I slowly and still shaking, ate what I could of both pushing around what was left until Melsighed, rolling her eyes and lifted the tray up. I gave her a look of thanks as Jeremy pushed me

back down laying a newly wet cloth over my forehead and tucking me in. Before they left I

grabbed Jeremys wrist and took a deep breath before whispering thank you. He smiled giving

me an anytime and telling me hed come check on me in the morning. Mel gave me a big hug

before rewrapping me and left as well. My friends really were great people and I didnt knowwhat I ever did to deserve them. For some reason I wasnt really worried about the fact that I had

just spoken to Jeremy because most likely he would never mention it again and Im sure the

guards had no way of knowing about it.

I fell asleep quickly but I didnt sleep well. I was up already and hadnt moved at all formaybe three or four hours before Jeremy showed up with a fruit cup, which I ate while he

checked my temperature. He shook his head and went and got another cloth for me and I knew I

wasnt much better than yesterday. I dozed in and out throughout the day and was asleep whenmy door burst open and Jared ran to my side.

* * * Jeremy * * *

I didnt understand anything. I didnt understand how anyone could just go missing like thatand then reappear and try to pretend that nothing had happened. Jared had told us hed seen her

up and around which I found almost impossible, do to how bad her fever is. He said that she

wouldnt tell him why she was gone, where she was, or anything actually. He also told us thatshe wasnt speaking.

But I did know that her fever wasnt getting better anytime soon. It almost seemed like she

hadnt eaten in a week which for all I knew could be true. She was weak, shaky, pale, and aboveall you could tell she was freaked out. Something had scared her into silence and it just about

broke your heart to see someone so full of energy and optimism just crash like that.


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Mel was worried to and I just couldnt lie to her and say that Light was perfectly fine. We

were somewhat silent as we walked towards the games room where the others were hanging out.Today was also the Mario cart championship and so far Joey was in the lead. They knew how we

had been to see Light for the past few days though we havent told them shes sick yet. We

walked in and went to go sit on the couch next to Joey and Liza. Jared was off to the side a bit

stuck in his own head. So whats up with Light? Did she tell you why she disappeared yet? Why is she missing the

championship? Goodness knows shes the only one able to whoop Joeys but in this game,

asked Liza. Jareds head snapped in our direction and I almost wanted to tease him for being soobvious.

No she hasnt said a word. And I just dont think shes exactly up for competing in the

championship at the mo. Jared frowned and came closer.

And whats that supposed to mean? he said and I sighed wishing he had kept quiet knowinghe was the only one who would have caught onto that other than Mel.

She just isnt feeling well right now I said hoping they wouldnt catch on that this was a

major understatement. But he shot up and was out the room before I could even tell him to chill.

The others werent happy that she was sick but didnt think any more of it trusting me and Mel totell them if she needed anything.

Light was probably the most innocent person I had ever met. Growing up here she was keptaway from bullying, drugs, drama, and all the other problems of the world. Her mind only

seemed to be filled which childlike thoughts of rainbows and optimism. Nothing had ever gotten

her down before because she saw the silver lining in each and every cloud in the sky. Now it waslike watching as someone broke her little bubble and everything fell on her at once. Of course I

wasnt stupid enough to think she was like this only because of psychological damage. I knew

that something had taken a toll on her body as well but it was how she was effected mentally that

was stopping her from getting better.

Light has always been like a baby sister to me and Mel for as long as weve been here. Shesalways been small and from what others have said she hasnt changed at all from when she

turned thirteen. Her birthday was coming up in about a week and then she would be sixteen. That

was a little old to treat her like a child still but something about her had just always screamed

Protect me!.With all that being said it didnt mean we thought she was completely without strength. If

something happened that she objected to then she had always made her opinion loud and clear.She was always there for everyone whenever they needed something. She believed everyone

should be treated equally and didnt see how people could hate each other. She always said it

was just a waste of energy. And of course she loved everyone. Of course since she believed

everyone should be treated equally she didnt understand the whole boy/girl thing ( somethingthat was constantly frustrating for Jared). The only difference in her mind was that she knew we

did indeed have different body parts and that boys were better in video games and that we didnt

wear skirts or dresses. She wasnt slow or anything, that was just the way she was.I put my arm around Mel knowing she was probably thinking among the same lines as I

was. Of course Mel was worried about her twin and that made the situation even worse because

then I had to see the both of them in pain.

Hey, I said softly squeezing her arm. She looked over at me and smiled halfheartedly.

Dont worry Light will be fine. Jared always has his way so if he tells her to get better she

will, I teased. She rolled her eyes but leaned her head on my chest.


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Yeah everything will be okay, she said quietly as the championship continued.

* * * Light * * *

Jared? I asked sleepily as I tried to sit up and failed again.He swore softly came over and checked my temperature and then swore again.

Light you have to tell me what happened. Whatever yourscared of doesnt matter and it isnt

good for you to try to hide it. Were all scared for you and were not going to sit around andwatch as you let this get to you. He said determined. I opened my mouth but panicked and shut

it again trying to shake my head. He jumped up and I flinched at the anger in his eyes.

Dammit Light, Dont be so stupid! Youre not accomplishing anything. Just think of howworried Mel and Jeremy are. Just think of how much pain Miss May is in right now. Be strong

for once and talk to me he yelled.

I flinched a little. Wow that stung. I was still shaky but I tried to pull myself up.

Jared help me up, I asked lightly. He said nothing waiting for me to talk, and helped me into asitting position. I tried to take a breath to calm myself but I still stuttered through it.

W-w-when I f-f-found Jake, I w-w-went to the office, a-a-and I tried to take calming

breaths and Jared took my hand. I took one more breath and told him everything.

I thought he would be shocked, and horrified and he was definitely horrified, but he lookedmore disappointed than surprised. Like he knew this stuff might be going on and I just confirmed

it. He patted me on the head when I was done and I frowned at him.

You know none of us would have said anything to them. I suspected Mr. Darenforth was a bit

off his rocker but this is bad. Well keep quiet for now but anything could set him off again. He

said more to himself then to me I think. For some reason I was surprised, as if I didnt expect

him to believe me. But I felt so relieved to have it all said out loud, it made me feel like I wasntcrazy.

Jared is there something your not telling me? Its almost as if you expected something among

those lines, I asked confused. Instead of answering he told me something else.

Mary-Anne and Jacob both disappeared right after those incidents and no one has seen them

since. Weve been told they were sent home but I dont really believe that, he said quietly as if

hoping I wouldnt hear him.

I was so shocked I said nothing. Now I was sure there were a few things he wasnt tellingme or anyone else. I felt so exhausted from everything that I slumped back against the head

board yawned. Jared checked my temperature again and then went into the bathroom and got me

another wet cloth that he put across my forehead.

Maybe you better sleep now. One of us will be here in the morning to see how your doing, hesaid gently tucking me in. I rolled my eyes. I was not five, I didnt need to be tucked in.

Jared, I called before he opened the door. He turned around and waited.I bit my lip and looked away before continuing.

I dont want to go back there, I said quietly, part of me not wanting him to hear me.

His face softened before he walked back over to me for a second and waited until I looked

him in the eye.

You wont, I promise, he whispered placing his right hand on my cheek. He looked so sincereI had to trust him. I nodded and he smiled before getting up, calling a good night and leaving the

room.That night I did not sleep well at all nor did someone come to wake me up so as usual I

woke up screaming and crying, the tears streaming down my face. I gasped and tried to breath

after swallowing the lump in my throat. After a while the tears finally stopped and I calmed


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down, though my stomach started to hurt. I tried to get up and managed to roll out of bed and

crawl into the bathroom. I made it to the toilet just in time to start throwing up everything I hadeaten in the last 24 hours. After I had nothing left to puke I managed to flush it down before

collapsing onto the ground and falling unconscious.

* * * Jared * * *

What happened to Light was worse than I thought. I knew they were going to be tough on theothers when they disappeared but realistically, Light really didnt do anything.

That guy is insane and I couldnt wait for Williams father to give him exactly what he deserved.

I now knew the specifics of how the punishment went and the only thing I needed now were thebodies of either Mary-Anne or Jake to prove it. And I needed to move fast because Light isntgoing to last much longer here.

When I came here to start the reconnaissance work I never thought I would actual makefriends and even fall for someone. Light was so unique and there was something very different

about her then the other subjects here. I was pretty sure she had stopped aging, physically and in

some ways mentally. She wasnt given as much medication as the others, she was horrified at the

thought of anyone eating dead animals, and her voice was very powerful. In all honesty Ms. May

was supposed to have died from her disease about 10 years ago, before Light came along. Sincethen Light has been almost a kind of medicine for her, to keep prolonging her life, and to take

away her pain.Of course Miss. May and I both know that as soon as Light gets taken away from her for a

prolonged period of time that she will die and we have both excepted that fact. Light needs to

leave as soon as possible and I was going to get her out of here. My one problem was that she

wasnt healthy enough to travel right now and unless she got healthy soon I was going to have torisk more damage.

Jeremy and I were both going to look after her this morning and I surely appreciated the fact

that Jeremy knew a lot more about medicine and stuff then I did.He entered the room first and stopped causing me to just stop myself from crashing into him.

I was about to ask what he was doing when I noticed what he was looking at.

Light was not in her bed. Knowing she couldnt get very far on her own I went to her

bathroom and sucked in a breath as I found her passed out on the floor. I knew she wasntsleeping because I knew she has never slept soundly in her life. And if she was asleep right now

it would have been the first time had had ever stayed motionless while asleep. Before you start

thinking that Im a stalker who watched her sleep I got that information from Miss May, becauseLight tells her everything.

I knelt down and carefully lifted her checking her breathing. Jeremy came in shortly

afterwards and checked her temperature and pulse. All three were bad and she was getting soskinny from lack of food that she was starting to look on the edge of becoming an anorexic. She

had still ate enough that her bones didnt protrude from her body and her face was still nice andround not sunken in but we had best get some food in her fast.

Jeremy carefully took her out of my arms and then stood up.

I need you to sit down in the shower, he said. I blinked and looked at him like he had lost hismind.

Why on earth do you want me to sit in her shower?He rolled his eyes and tilted his head towards the shower.

Just trust me and get in. We have to be quick, he said more seriously.

Trusting Jeremy I sat down in the shower. He came over next and placed her in my lap. I


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wrapped my arms around her still not understanding what he was doing until I felt beads of cold

water falling onto my head.

What the hell man! I practically yelled. We needed to cool her down. But not enough that shell get hypothermia and make it worse.

Your body heat will keep her warm enough that that wonthappen. Itll also wake her up enough

that we can feed her, he finished motioning to Light whose eyelids were fluttering open as shetried to lift her head, and failed once again.

Im going to go get the food. Dont move from there until I get back, he warned.

I simply nodded and moved the hair out of Lights face as she looked up at me confused.* * * Light * * *

I woke up jolted by a stream of cold water falling over my head. Despite the cold water the

blanket I was leaning against was very warm. Thats when I looked up Into Jareds face andnoticed I was not leaning against a blanket but in fact a human being.

What..? I started but my voice was so horse from vomiting I had to clear my throat. To no

avail I still kind of sounded like a chain smoker.

Jared? What are you doing? What happened? I asked looking around.

I should be asking you that, he said as he wrapped his arms tighter around me keeping mewarm.

I dont. I trailed off before remembering.

My stomach felt really off this morning so I threw up and then passed out. Yup thatsdefinitely gross. If I was being optimistic it could have been worse. I could have vomited all over

myself or this train of thought is making me sick all over again. I didnt want to throw up

again even though I was pretty sure my stomach was empty, I still didnt want to risk it. Soinstead I concentrated On Jareds breathing and timing my breathing with his.

Now I know I havent showered in a while but I didnt smell that bad that you had to drag me

here unconscious did you? I asked joking. I felt and heard as he laughed.

No, Jeremy wanted to keep you cool and wake you up enough to eat something. Pretty soonyoull just be a sack of bones, he said and I wasnt sure whether or not he was joking. He

sounded like he meant to tease me but he was so worried it kind of leaked into it. I squeezed his

hand hoping to reassure him that I was fine. Unfortunately I barely brushed his hands with my

fingertips. I couldnt grip anything and it was downright sad. Im fine Jared. Everyone gets sick, and with what happened, its no wonder my bodys worn

out. Im sure after a few days rest Ill be right as rain, I said smiling. He just shook his headobviously not believing it would be that easy then rested his chin in my hair.

Okay I know our group thinks Im oh so innocent and all that. But even I know that some

people think that sitting in a guys lap in the shower would be awkward. But the thing was sinceeveryone thought me a child that no one would ever think anything of something like this. My

friends were just taking care of me, like I knew they would. I had to admit the cold water felt

nice on my face and Jared was pretty freaking warm. I felt bad somewhat because his cloths were

getting drenched but on the other hand there was no way we were going to sit here without them.

Jared was completely silent and if I didnt know any better I would have thought he was

sleeping. As a matter of fact I was probably close to it with my eyelids drooping. At one point

Im pretty sure I dozed off because next thing I knew both Mel and Jeremy were also in thebathroom. And thank goodness for my twin had dry cloths in her hand. Jared reached up and

turned off the taps before pulling me up to, keeping a hand around my waist to support me.

Mel ran over and gave me a hug while pulling me away from Jared.


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Cmon twin, Ill help you get changed. Which means all boys out ofthe bathroom! she

commanded and Jared and Jeremy didnt need to be told twice. I laughed because no oncemesses with my twin. If she said back off you better back off or she could probably whoop your

but.

Mel was pretty strong and was built so it was easy for her to help hold me up while I

changed into grey sweat pants and another white t-shirt. Mels body was the opposite of mine. Iwas tiny and looked like a child, Mel had curves and looked like a grown women. I envied her at

times, except whenpeople were ogling her and shed have to smack them. I really would rather

not have to smack anybody. Say no to violence and all that. Not that I blamed her because ifsomeone ever did that to me I might have to change my philosophy and give them a good whack.

Mel helped me change into sweat pants and a plain white shirt before she lifted me up (

seriously it was almost insulting that these people could throw me around like I weighed lessthan a sack of potatoes) and piggy backed me back into the room. It was strange that I hadntdone anything in a couple of days now but I still felt drained. My eyes started to close while still

on Mels back and I almost fell asleep before Jared lifted me off and put me back in bed. Mel

said she had to go in for therapy so shed see us later and left. Jeremy stayed long enough to

check me over again, make me eat the soup, frown and then said hed be back later.I leaned against my head board wondering when Jared would leave but he gave no sign of

leaving.

Its okay Jared, you dont have to keep me company. Ill probably just sleep anyway, I toldhim rubbing my eye and yawning.

Naw its alright, I want to make sure your okay. You can sleep if you want to. I can just grabmy erubics cube and see if I can do it under 30 seconds instead, he joked trying to lighten themood. I smiled up at him and as much as I wanted to stay up and talk to him I was too tired. I

nodded, curled up into a ball and went to sleep.

* * * Jared * * *Although I joked about going to get the erubics cube there was no way I was leaving

her. Right now, I was anything but bored. I could tell that Jeremy was getting frustrated and that

scared me. Nothing he could think of was working in the slightest to lower her temperature.

Which could mean two things. One, that her body was too weak to try to fight off the threat. Ortwo, that her illness was spell bound. A spell bound illness is when someone uses magic to make

sure that someone cant get better. And most of the time the person managed to make a deal with

them. Once the deal was broken a spoken contract opened and started to suck the life from theone who had broken the deal. I almost wished it was the first option because for the second, the

only way to make it stop is to kill the people on the other side of the deal or to move them as far

away from them as possible.I glanced over and noticed a light snore coming from her mouth before she started shivering.

I quickly went and put more blankets over her and waited. After about an hour the shivering

stopped and her face started to get flushed. I pulled some of the blankets off and waited again.

Luckily before she could get cold again she woke up and I helped her into a sitting position.After that we played would you rather.

Would you rather eat a snake covered in peanut butter, or spiders covered in jam?

Snake, cause at least you could cook it, I answered. She rolled her eyes.

Would you rather want to climb the Eiffel tower, or Mount Everest?

The Eiffel tower, me and Mel were going to steal a light bulb off it anyway someday, she

answered. I was a bit surprised by this. I was pretty sure that she was joking about the light bulb,


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but I was more surprised that she had talked about leaving. That was only surprising because

Light was pretty sure she was in here for life. Though I had different plans for her, especiallyafter realizing that her illness may be spell induced. Even though Light probably believes she

cant leave, Ill have to make her see that she has no other option.

Would you rather ride a bull, or battle a crocodile with a balloon animal?

I snorted. Well nobody could say she didnt have a strange imagination. I think its the wholeartist thing, it makes her more open minded, allowing her to see things others wouldnt and in

different ways. I could just hope she would be open minded when I had to tell her that.

Fight a crocodile with a balloon animal. That would just be fricken hilarious.So on the game went until Jeremy came back to give her a check up and told me to go in for

therapy. We couldnt have anyone find out that Light was sick( for a lot of reasons) and it would

seem suspicious if all the people she hung out around just suddenly stopped going to therapy and

appointments . And as for her, shed been gone for over a week so that wasnt very suspicious

for her to miss them for now anyway.

Just another reason we needed to get out while we could. My best bet for escape so far would

have to be Gabriel. Hes shown the most evidence that he would be capable of creating a suitable

diversion. After that well, it gets a little complicated. The diversion would work for sure but itwas also dangerous. If I didnt plan this carefully enough we could end up hurting and possibly

killing a lot of people.I was reluctant to leave her even knowing that. I mean what if I got back and she was worse?

Any number of things could happen and Id never forgive myself if I wasnt there to help. But I

trusted Jeremy. If anything went wrong while I was gone he would tell me. Of that at least I wassure. I patted him on the back on my way out the door and waved to Light letting her know I

would be back later. Though Light would never admit it I knew she needed the company. She

was never a loner type of person, always preferring to be around others, the more the merrier.

I went to therapy and secretly surveyed the nurses and doctors as they were checking on me.

It was my job to see all the flaws here, the things that didnt add up. One thing was that althoughmost of the questions could be referred to your health there was such an obvious double meaning

to what they were really looking for. Whats worse is that this place isnt the only one like it, just

the largest that we had found so far. Once this was all over we were going to put an end to theirlittle experiments, and we would get these people out of here.

* * * Light * * *

Jeremy stayed with me for a while, but I was just too tired. I fell asleep while he was stillthere and I had a feeling Jared put him up to it.

Jared always seemed to be over cautious and over protective. But he was also very clever.

He was quick to notice the smallest details and be able to build up what had happened from

them. Hed seemed impatient lately though. As if waiting for some kind of sign or something

forwhat?

I was too tired to try and puzzle out Jared. I was too tired to do anything actually. I wasnt

sure if I could even stand by myself any longer nor had I the energy to try. I knew that Jeremy

and Mel were scared by how bad it was getting and I could only hope that they dont tell theothers. I dont want to freak anyone out especially if by some miracle I make it through this then

all that drama would be for nothing. Of course thats not to say that the others wont notice

somethings up. Theyre smarter then that.

* * *

I woke up when I felt myself being shaken awake. Was it just me or were the hands on my


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arms burning? I managed to open my eyes and saw Jared eyes staring back at me. They were

bright and anxious and he in general looked really stressed.

Jared you can stop shaking me, Im awake, I told him wondering why I was still shaking. Heshook his head and his eyes filled.

Im not shaking you, youve been shivering and shaking all night. He informed me.

I frowned and tried to stop but I couldnt I looked up stressed and told him. I..I c..c..cant stop, I managed to get out.

Shhhhh, Light its okay. Just make it through and it will stop okay. Just make it through. He

murmured trying to keep calm.

I just nodded, but it wasnt easy. It hurt to much and I was so tired. Jared brushed the hairaway from my face and wiped it with a damp cloth. But after a while he gave up on that and just

pulled me into his lap and held me. Jared was probably the closest friend Ive ever had andprobably was the nicest. I can never imagine the strength it took to stay with me the whole night,

comforting me while my body shook. My head was leaned against his chest and I listened to his

heart beats. I focused on that trying to relax without falling unconscious.

Finally about an hour after the sun came up the shaking stopped. I could tell that Jared was just

as exhausted as I was so we just stayed where we were until Jeremy came.Jared had something to do so he left Jeremy to take care of me. He tried to get me to eat

breakfast but I could feel acid trying to make its way up at just the thought. Even water was

unappealing but Jeremy insisted and I didnt want to freak him out to bad so I sipped it reallyslowly. Jeremy was definitely out of his field now. He said he thought that he might know what

the symptoms meant but had no idea how to treat it.We were discussing whether or not it would be safe enough for me to sleep when Jared came

rushing back in

My Own Light

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