MY LIFE: An Autobiography

8/14/2019 MY LIFE: An Autobiography

1/26


2/26

time was a boy, when he was recommended by his abilities and talents to

the notice of the chairman of Igboshere Traders Union; Prince Ademola

Adelabu Onibiyo and was sent to University College, Ibadan at the

expense of a fund generated by the Union for such purpose. My father

there went through the usual course of study, and graduated as an

accountant, but never followed the profession; having satisfied himself

with the talent of petty trading he had developed from his own father. My

father could not believe the idea of working for someone else to be later

paid some little Pounds at the end of thirty days when he could move

about to get some wares from places to sell to people from places and

make better ponds there from; even before the count of a thirty-day.

In this period of my father's life there are two things which it is

impossible not to be struck with: one of them unfortunately a very common

circumstance, the other a most uncommon one. The first is, that in his

position, with no resource to start his business as desired, but the

precarious one of the small savings he made as an apprentice accountant in

an accounting firm in Orita Beere, in Ibadan. My father learnt the practical

of the accounting business every week-end; Friday through Saturday night.

With the little he had, he married and had a large family; conduct than

which nothing could be more opposed, both as a matter of good sense and


3/26

of duty, to the opinions which, at least at a later period of life, he

strenuously upheld. The other circumstance is the extraordinary energy

which was required to lead the life he led, with the disadvantages under

which he strived from the first, and with those which he brought upon

himself by his marriage. It would have been no small thing, had he done no

more than to support himself and his family during so many years of

trading, without ever being in debt, or in any financial difficulty; holding,

as he did, opinions, both in politics and in trade, which were more lovable

to all persons of influence, and to the common run of prosperous Igboshere

men in that generation than either before or since. My father was not only a

man whom nothing would have induced to do anything against his

convictions, but one who invariably put every thing he has into his trading

activities. He wrote, as much of his convictions as he thought the

circumstances would in any way permit: being, it must also be said, one

who never did anything negligently; never undertook any task, literary or

other, on which he did not conscientiously bestow all the labour necessary

for performing it adequately. But he, with these burdens on him, planned

his life in relation to what he wants his family members to become,

especially we; his children. And to this is to be added, that during the

whole period, a considerable part of almost every day was employed in the


4/26

instruction of us; his children: in the case of one of whom, myself, he

exerted an amount of labour, care, and perseverance rarely, if ever,

employed for a similar purpose, in endeavoring to give, according to his

own conception, a good order of intellectual education.

My father who, in his own practice, so vigorously acted up to the

principle of losing no time, was likely to try to pass on the same rule in his

offsprings as he brings them up. I have no remembrance of the time when I

began to learn good English like he would say. I have been told that it

was when I was three years old. That was when his contemporaries would

see him as an isolated mind. My earliest recollection on the subject, is

that of committing to memory what my father termed vocables, being

lists of common English words, with their uses in English, which he wrote

out for me on cards and some on the corner of his bicycle store. Of

grammar, until some years later, I learnt no more than the concords of the

nouns and verbs, but, after a course of vocables, proceeded at once to

some little lengthy constructions; and I faintly remember going through

Brighter Grammar part one to five. I crammed a lot of examples from the

books. I learnt very little of Arithmetic at this period, until my eighth year.

At that time I had read, under my father's guide, a number of poem and

story books.


5/26

In all his teaching, my father demanded of me; not only the utmost that I

could do, but much that I could by no possibility have done. What he was

himself willing to undergo for the sake of my instruction, may be judged

from the fact that I went through the whole process of preparing my

vocabulary lessons in the same store in which he kept his many business

wares, and on the same table he used for his personal accounting jobs. In

those days English language as a form of expression in the Igboshere

community was wanting. But my father was more than just an unlettered

trader, so I must be seen as expressing the personality of my father. I was

forced to have recourse to my father for the meaning of every word which I

did not know.

Then later in this part of my childhood, I learnt arithmetic: this; my

uncle, Toyeshe whom Im fond of, taught me, taking it as the task of the

evenings, and I well remember its disagreeableness. But the lessons were

only a part of the daily instruction I received. Much of it consisted in the

books I read by myself.

Uncle Toyes health required considerable and constant exercise,

and he walked habitually before breakfast, generally on the field behind

our house. In these walks I always accompanied him, and with my earliest


6/26


7/26

Nigerian Television authority. The Lord of the Flies was also fascinating.

We were actually literally forced to like it by Mr Samuel Kwame; our

Literature master from Ghana. He taught us in his Ghanaian accent which

we played upon each time he left our class.

I scarcely had any serious novel except those that were

recommended for pupils to get for lessons in English Literature; but I have

a number of story books some of which came from occasional gifts from

relation or acquaintance: among those I had, Reverend Bakko and the

Seven Lambs was preeminent, and continued to delight me through all my

boyhood. It was no part however of my uncle's system to exclude books of

amusement, though he allowed them very sparingly. At that time, he

possessed of such books next to none, but he borrowed several for me;

especially each time he feels I needed to keep myself busy; like a bee. So

each moment my uncle feels like whiling away his time or when he wanted

to maketh the man in himself the more; he would call me out and we used

to sit under the mango tree on the field behind our house. Bayo! He used

to call out the short form of my name. Then he would say continuous

reading maketh the man in a man; and I would get the message.


8/26

I started attending Arabic class in my tenth year, in conjunction with a

younger sister, to whom I taught it as I went on, and who afterwards

repeated the lessons to my father. Other sisters and brothers later joined us

as pupils, a considerable part of my day's work consisted of this

preparatory teaching of the language of a religion. My father compelled

me. Pass what you know to those you know more than; he used to say. It

was a part which I greatly disliked; the more so, as I was held responsible

for the lessons of my pupils, in almost as full a sense as for my own. I was

compelled to teach them part of what they learned in their various schools.

As time went by I derived great advantage of learning more thoroughly

from this discipline the; and more lastingly retaining the things which I

was set to teach: perhaps, too, the practice it afforded in explaining

difficulties to others, may even at that age have been useful. In other

respects, the experience of my boyhood is not favourable to the plan of

teaching children by means of one another. The teaching, I am sure, is very

inefficient as teaching, and I well knew that the relation between teacher

and taught is not a good moral discipline to either. I went in this manner

through the my own Arabic lessons.

In the same year in which I began Arabic, I made my first

commencement in French lessons. It was a special arrangement organized


9/26

by the head teacher of my school for those who had interest. After I had

made some progress in my study my father bought an interactive video

Parle de Frances. It was my first direct contact with French

conversation I had cared to take part in, and it became a great experience

which for many years I most delighted. I think I must have watched the

video so many times that I lost counts. Soon after this time I commenced

the learning of some building blocks; in preparation for my common

entrance examinations.

From my tenth to my twelfth year I realized I was growing into

more vivid realities. I saw some seniors in our neighborhood who were

living some lifestyle I used to think that I should live it better when I get to

their age. For most weekends of my primary five, I was usually busy

representing my school in debate contests. It later appeared that I did not

have the competence for mathematics as much as I do for English

language. For my father, not having kept up this part of his early acquired

knowledge, could not spare time to qualify himself for removing my

difficulties, and left me to deal with them, with little other aid than that of

books; while I was continually incurring his displeasure by my inability to

solve difficult problems for which he did not see that I had not the

necessary previous knowledge.


10/26

My father was not too happy. Lacomb; the Mathematics book which

I remember reading least was bought for me by my father on the

recommendation of the specially hired home teacher. I used to manage to

pass it at average success; but English language brilliantly.

CLOSE TO ADOLESCENCE

From about age twelve, in the second term of my secondary

education I started to realize what my father had been worried about in

relation to my poor penchant for mathematics. I was being groomed for

science because my father wanted it; although at a time I deliberately

developed more penchants under the influence of pair group. So much as I

could have made good blending into the science fold, some realization

downed on me- during this part of my childhood, one of my greatest

challenge in school wasexperimental science. In the theoretical, however, I

managed a position among the best ten in the class. Today experimental

science is a kind of discipline which I have often regretted not having had

-- nor even seeing, but merely reading about them. I have laid my hands on

a number of things outside my eventual discipline and profession; most of

which my non-inclination to certain basics have become hurdles I long to


11/26

cross. The Holmes Law, the Boyles Law and many more were active in

theory in my knowledge of them, but not in application and practice. I was

recalcitrant to my father's criticisms of the bad reasoning respecting the

first principles of physics, which abounds in the early part of that work. I

devoured treatises on Chemistry; but that was not enough for me to end up

as a scientist by profession.

I entered into another and more advanced stage in my course of

instruction; in which the main object was no longer the aids and appliances

of thought in pure science but in social science. Adams Smith was a great

economist; whose theory of scarcity and want overwhelmed my interest.

Realizing that he should allow me to be what I could be, my father

supported me in reading the whole or parts of several of the economics,

Business Methods, Commerce, and so forth. Giving each day to him, in our

walks, a minute account of what I had read of these knowledge, and

answering his numerous and searching questions about them, my father

was not too convinced that I was there yet. I well remember how, and in a

particular walk, in the neighborhood of Ikate in Surulere, Lagos state

(where we were on a visit to his old friend Mr Aderounmu, the then

President of Igbosere Traders Union) he first attempted by questions to

make me realize that he was no longer against what I feel like becoming as


12/26

far as my education was concerned. He was unusually silent at a time; then

he cleared his throat, and framed some conception of what life seemed like

for great writers like Chinua Achebe, Wole Shoyinka who was then

recently nominated for a Nobel Laurel, and the likes of them. At first the

style did not make the matter at all clear to me at the time; but it was not

therefore useless. What he tried to discuss remained as a nucleus for my

observations and reflections to crystallize upon; the import of his general

remarks being interpreted to me, by the particular instances which came

under my notice afterwards. My own consciousness and experience

ultimately led me to appreciate quite as highly as he did, the value of an

early practical familiarity with reading novels and story books; attending

literary competitions, etc. I know nothing, in my education, to which I

think I am more indebted to than this habit he ensured that I imbibe as

early as my childhood which started in his bicycle store and on his table in

the corner of his store. For whatever capacity of writing and oratory I have

attained today, the books of literature and styles my father encouraged me

to read; coupled with the support of uncle Toye, remained the impetus that

made it for me.Today, whatever good level of intellect I attained was due

to the fact that it was an intellectual exercise in which I was most

perseveringly drilled by my father, yet it is also true that the school


13/26

experience and the mental habits acquired in studying with my uncle Toye.

I learnt many things in my first and second levels of education in

life. But what I learnt from uncle-Toye, are responsible today for most of

my idea of life as a growing young man. From him, I understand that an

opportunity is like a double edged sword that should be very well managed

to achieve a goal; otherwise trouble comes. Regarding this I remember two

particular occasions.

I arrived home unusually early the Friday that I got my third report

card in primary four. I came second in my class and was promoted to

primary five. I could not wait to show my result to my uncle- Toyeshe;

whom I was really fond of. He speaks the type of English I think by then,

was great and I had always wanted to speak like him. He had promised to

take me to Apapa Amusement Park if my position in class was between the

first and the third. So as our class teacher called out our names and handed

over our report cards to each of us, I could not control my ecstasy. I

sneaked out of the school as the janitor ranged the bell for break period. I

was eager to break the news of my success to my uncle whom I believed

would be at home. So I rushed home. There was no one at home. My

mother had gone to her workplace; Daddy too. Taye and Koinde- my

siblings are apparently still in their school. My uncle had gone to my


14/26

school to fulfill the promise he made to pick me up after school; especially

because school would close on that day for the session. I had forgotten

about the promise. I was too happy to remember. I rushed home before the

school bell rang! My little success of that day caused some big problem

for the school. The situation turned out as a case of a missing student. Later

on when it was discovered that I was not missing after all, my uncle

fulfilled his promise to me the next day; but not without admonishing me.

Dont mishandle your success so that it doesnt turn to failure, he told

me.

Taye, Kionde and I get fifty kobo every morning from our mother

each time we are ready to go to school as our pocket money. When we

return later in the day, uncle Toye as we fondly call him; would ask of our

little drop of water. I was most consistent to bring back one naira, fifty

kobo, because I just liked to impress my uncle. Then, came a year that all

of us cannot forget easily. Our long school holiday coincided with Ileya

festival. Daddy said he did not have enough money to buy new shoes for

the three of us, after buying the ram for the festival and our clothing for the

celebration. We felt bad, even though each of us still has two pairs of shoes

that were close to new ones. Three days to the festival, uncle Toye called

for me; and I was in his room. Then he asked if I could imagine how my


15/26

little drops of water had turned into an ocean! After explaining many

things that I could not really comprehend then; beyond the understanding

that he would be able to buy a new pair of shoes for me from my savings

he had kept on my behalf, my uncle took me out to Teju-osho shopping

complex, around Ojuelegba. I was happy. I am even more happy today as a

young man each time I gather a number of thousands of Naira from drops

of rain that I keep from the remains I get from some commercial

transactions I make.

LIFE FROM AFTER HIGH SCHOOL

Life is like a piece of furniture; a bed. It assumes what you care to

make it look like. An individual is the maker of his bed and he sleeps on it

accordingly. My early adult life was built on realities. Part of it has been

mere stroke of luck; yet Fijabi; my best friends elder brother, by no less

mean tried to always prove to us that luck is facilitated by strong effort and

willingness. Looking back now, I see those beautiful days of mine in

Gombe, Ngeria. I see thse great guys- John Ibitoye, Lasun Adams, Arith

Odu, Mudathir Salami; he is a medical doctor who did a quick diagnosos

of a major infection that could have held me down for several months. My

friends and I; during my adult age are really fond of ourselves. Arith Odu


16/26

was very close. She would stay in my apartment till close to midnight. We

belonged to the same Community Development (CD) group- the

Information and Orientation group. So we would plan our quarterly

newsletter; and some other flimsy talk we used to have. Arith came from

Bayelsa state, she taught me many things about her tribe and people;

although not without an exchange with a little of information regarding the

Yoruba culture she would be keen to get from me in return. Like me, she is

the first child of her parents, and the first daughter too. She is not

privileged to taste the urban experience I had during childhood. After six

months of our National Youth Service Corps experience we both became

very close; intimate was our relationship that many people were shocked to

know that we only liked one another; and not beyond that. I have had

course to speak with her fianc several moment, even before meeting him

physically.

John Igemode was tall like me. A Bayelsan though; he speaks

impeccable Yoruba dialect because he had his childhood experience in

Lagos until he went for his university education in his state of origin. The

two of us have had a particular reason to run into one another like to waters

without noticing it- we attended Igbobi College together. It was shocking

for many corps members to know that Arith was going to be taken to the


17/26

altar by another individual apart from the guy they have always observed

her intimacy with all the while. By my experience with Arith, I learnt self

restrain. By a number of my friends I learnt some idea about leadership;

about mature relationship. Life is all about people around you, I

remember my mother often say. The reality never sunup on me like it did

during my National Service experience.

MY BIG SHOCK

So far, by my experience of life has been quite interesting. I cried

very much when my beloved mother died on 31st of August, 2003; exactly

seven days after my birthday celebration. Incidentally too it was the day I

wrote my last examination in my third year in the university.

She did not have much education than National Certificate in

Education NCE. She started as a teacher in a public secondary school. She

stopped as soon as she conceived her first child- me. The experience was a

little much for her to bear. She was often advised to take some bed rest

almost every week.

After her delivery of her first child, trading took over from teaching as a

mean of livelihood. Indeed she became successful in the business of selling

and buying provisions. I remember my primary school days- a number of


18/26

my friends started friendship with me because my mother sells biscuits

anD chocolates. I steal some to school every morning in addition to what

ever my mother gives to me from her preference. Mother tried to prod

daddy to develop a tradition of getting new school uniform for us at the

beginning of every term. A students outlook has influence on his psyche;

she believed. Even when daddy refused at a time, mother bought new

uniforms for us; even before the end of a term. She would spoil us; daddy

used to say. She knew what she was doing. According to her belief; mother

works because of her children.

Our neighbors repose a lot secretes in mother because of the trust

they have in her. We did not really understand her attitude towards people

then. I was particularly small, my uncle Toye once told me; to know that

she gives out as mush as she gets. I remember though that each moment we

had to invite people for certain celebration or the other our compound was

always filled with crowd. But mother died! She just died; no explanation

more than she gave in to this heart ailment she had really spent much to get

rid of.

After my last exams in the session, I traveled to Ede, Osun state to

se a friend before going home- to Lagos. By the third day, one of my

siblings surprisingly appeared to us in a classroom where I was with my


19/26

friend in his school. Taye entered and beamed a smile at us. I was happy

but surprised to see him. I had sent another friend of mine; a school mate to

inform my family of my plan to take some few days off with my friend in

Ede.

Taye broke a surprising news- not the one of my mothers situation,

but my elder brothers. Kayode was traveling to Germany for his master

programme. He would be taking off that night so I have to hurry home

that day to see him off at the airport later in the evening. I rushed to Lagos;

happy. Sad; vary sad I latter became when I knew that Taye stealthily took

me home to know that mother had gone home. Mother died. She was

gone. And that is history; but I remember every bit of her love. I took a lot

from her. From her I got it that having good people around one are of great

essence.

I had a high degree of influence on most of my friends. No other

reason is attached to this than the fact that they enjoy my philosophy of

relationship- straightforwardness. I actually got much of them from my

mother- No double standard. In fact they had almost succeeded in

nudging me to become the next president of our faculty association-

Faculty of Arts Students Association FASA, University of Ilorin. The death


20/26

of my mother at that period unfortunately caused the death of that political

ambition.

EFFECT OF SHOCK

In fact, her death affected many things because she was strong and

showed us more care. Yes, more than daddy did. She could not complete

the payment of her mortgage. Tundes education almost suffered, and so

forth.

Three years later, life appeared to me in full glare. Right from my

national youth service experience, I started to experiment some of the

philosophies I had acquired from childhood. A spirit started to grow in

me, like wild fire in a hot harmattan in a northern Nigerian state; where I

did my National Youth Service. The zeal to succeed in life started to grow.

I started some friendship with a number of individuals right from

my first day in the orientation camp as a youth corps member in Malam

Sidi Camp, in Nafada Local Government Area of Gombe State. The best of

my friends was Arith Odu- a lady from Bayelsa state, Mudashir Salami, a

graduate of medicine. He graduated from University of Ibadan. I graduated


21/26

as a Linguist from University of Ilorin. It did not take Doki (as I fondly

call him) any trouble to notice the way I speak. He liked the way I speak-

like my uncle; Toye. So when there was an announcement on the

orientation camp that there was going to be a recruitment of announcers

that would work in the OBS- Orientation Broadcasting Service he rushed

down to our room (we shared one). Bayo they want you! he shouted from

outside of the room. That was how my first significant success started as a

young graduate. I took part in the try-out conducted by the organizers and

came out top on the list of successful candidates.

Mallam Sidi camp became more interesting starting from June 8th,

2005. By 5am I was awake. I could not wait to go on air on the OBS. My

duties for the day usually begin with announcing the brake of a new day,

and the schedule of activities. Then I would play some marshal

instrumentals, then announcements and so forth. I loved every thing I did

on the orientation camp. My diary was full of records of my daily

experiences. I had more and more friends. I was careful not to let the

euphoria of my status drawn my consciousness and focus. I worked harder

to the admiration of the officials, especially the orientation camp director. I

got some commendations. After the third week on camp, I was posted to

serve in the state radio station as my place of primary assignment.


22/26

For the only year that I served in GSBS- Gombe State Broadcasting

Serves, I recorded additional success because I was able to develop great

love for broadcasting as a profession. I met many more people, most of

whom were quite older and more experienced in and outside the

profession. I attended a number of trainings and workshops.

The state award I won as one of the best youth corps member in

2006 meant that I had to stay behind in the northern state of Gombe while

most of my friends; including Doki had to go back to their various states.

I got an automatic employment from the state government.

For me, I look back at my journey so far; especially from my

secondary school days up till present and I am happy to note that life has

been fairly good. I have seen some dark clouds amidst bright skies during

my day times, just as I have experienced sparkling brightness at the turn of

a number of dark burrows. In spite of all I could have had of life

experiences, all I know is that life is about people.

IN LOCO PARANTIS

My experience in the North for four years gives me a realization:

life is all about relationship. People come together to do one thing or the

other. As human being we come to meet people we have not met before


23/26

and we are bound to separate later on. One can only enjoy the period of

togetherness s according to the extent of how much good relationship was

maintained.

My father, uncle Toye, my mother, Arith, Doki and some other

people have drawn some indelible marks in my records of life experience.

Alhaji Maikudi- the General Manager of Gombe State Broadcasting

Services; GSBS acted in loco parentis for three years of my life in

Gombe. From office my relationship with him grew right into his home:

his family- two wives, six children, and a number of his friends. He

smokes heavily.

After five months that I stated my primary assignment at the GSBS,

the GM had some bad health. I brought in my friend Doki who confided

in me that my GM was just developing some acute ulcer in the lower

abdomen. Nothing can really cure that baba unless he changes his eating

habbit; Doki confided in me. Without being a physician, I knew that

Alhaji Maikudi was suffering from something else caused by another habit

he had developed; apparently several years before I got to Gombe. I liked

him beyond his role as a manager of my workplace. He was my adopted

father in my service year.


24/26

Mudashiru- my Doki friend would do my bidding any time. We

must build up some picture by which my desire would be achieved. Doki

had told the GM that he would come to see how the Gm feared the next

day. He did some checkups and suddenly raised some tension which was

visibly felt by the GM. His ailment could turn terminal unless he stopped

smoking. From no where the Hausa old man brought out a copy of Quran

and swore never to smoke again.

Alhaji Maikudi is retired now, I am aware. He enjoys great nicotine-

free health. I use to wonder how he would fell to know how little change of

habit made such big difference in his life. Change is constant; just as it is

relative. Knowing when to make the right one is the obligation of the

mater.

MY PERSPECTIVES OF LIFE AND THE FUTURE

People I met yesterday to a large extent have made my today.

Four years after my service year have recorded another round of

experiences. I am growing; I think more in experience than in my age

chronology. Through previous contacts I have made more friends today

that look out for me. When any one of us is having a bad day, we always

have someone amongst us as friends to talk to.


25/26

I spend most parts of my day at work. I talk and talk to people on air

as an announcer and a programme presenter. Then I talk together with my

friends off air- no idle talk any way. And alone with myself when I get

home, I talk in my mind. I think about my future; both immediate and

long future. Would I have enough time for my kids to take from my

philosophy of life? How would my wife like it that she sees her husband

only quite late at nights and he leaves for work early morning? No

weekend holidays etc.

More of these contemplations have been coming now. I have few

years more to begin another life experience with my wife, my kids- my

own family. Apart from the time I would have to think of how to create to

be with my Folashade and the kids she would bear for me, I dont see any

uncommon worry when I start my family.

I have an outlook of a more challenging future. The kind of future

that would call for more dedication to responsibilities I am saddled with. I

have always imagined my greatness- big, big success coming from

consistent sought for it. I know I would need a strong support and

understanding from no less than my only friend- my wife.

Together with her and our children, I see great future. A life of

bigger success enhanced by great relationship with good people I have and


26/26

would be having. I am positive of such successful future because my Fola

also has similar philosophy of life like mine.

MY LIFE: An Autobiography

Documents

Transcript of MY LIFE: An Autobiography