[1]

October

PAST

She was born, fled to sunny Arkansas, chained to Bentonville, and happy with the last Mauren Monthly edition.

PRESENT

Probably doing something for college, English, or volleyball.

FUTURE

Will be going to college for film, marry Josh, and invite her favorite best friend to her first movie premiere.

A little late...

but

well worth the wait

MAU

REN

MNT

H

We love Mauren!

Hey Gurl Hey!

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VOLLEYBEASTSThis is for all those who don’t know the scoop behind the infamous Volleyball Beastets.

If you were to ask Mauren, “What

are you doing right now?” There is

about an 80% chance that she will say

“Doin’ stats.” Stats? What are stats?

She would quickly exclaim, “Volleyball!

Agh!” Mauren Kennedy is the manager

of the Bentonville Tigers Volleyball

Team. She at one point played for the

Tigers, but now is running the show,

tallying up numbers of spikes, steals,

or whatever some other volleyball

moves jargon are. I know that

sentence didn’t make too much sense,

but I’m going on.

Through experience I have come

to know many of these girls on the

team. And they are absolute beasts.

Have you ever seen a volleyball rip

through the air, tearing, no clawing, the

weak faces of the opponents across

the net? Its intense. These miraculous

gals are funny beyond belief, from the

horrible sounds that come out of their

mouths to the inside “creeper” jokes,

being in their presence is a true treat.

I’m bored of writing, imma put in a

filler picture...

Brief explanation of volleyball stats from Mauren:

hell

FIERCE

This just in: B-Ville Tigers

2008 State Champs!CHAMPMODE

[3]

THE GROBAN PHENOMENON-the mystery behind the fascination and desire to do one that is famous

Mauren likes em’ hairy

(so does Page)

If you could marry, do,hook up with, or any of the combined, who would it be?

~Rihanna...^___^

Morgan Freeman or

Hillary Clinton

COLIN FIRTH!!!! ...or Demetri Martin.. or ... John Frusciante. (RHCP

guitarist...flannel + scruff=delicious)

BEN STOLE MINE RIIIIIIIIHHHHAAAANNNNNNA or

Kira Knightly MY WIVES!!!!!!!

I'd marry Aslan and make half God/Lion and half Robert

offspring.

The body of Michael Phelps with the words of Jack

Johnson, or Gerard Butler from P.S. I Love You...or James Marsden from 27 dresses.

There’s so many...

I’ve always had a thing for Rachel McAdams (but any color of hair besides blonde, it

made her look dumb).

After seeing Charlie Bartlet and Nick and Norah’s, Kat

Dennings is the ultimate fox.

QUOTES BIZNITCH

Nulla facilisi:Pellentesque eu aliquet vel. Vitae vehicula lobo rtis. Ultricies mole stie libero dignissim id mauris, mus nec tempus lorem.

LOOK...THAT GUYS KILLING HIMSELF...

What’s your favorite quote?

Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love;

this is the eternal rule.

Cody EarthchildLiving without contrivance,

there is not lack of manageability. ~Tao Te Ching

Ghetto Britches MatthewI don’t care if you cover yourself in peanut butter

and have a 15 hooker GANG BANG!!!!!

~Saw

Page “Shoulda’dance” Vick

The aim of flattery is to soothe and encourage us by assuring us of the truth

of an opinion we have already formed about

ourselves.~Dame Edith Sitwell

Maned MicahGo placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace

there may be in silence...~desiradata, Max

Ehrmann

Robert the TallI like it when you call

me big papa~The Notorious B.I.G.

Owl Anthony CityThe friendship that can

cease has never been real

~Saint Jerome

Owl Anthony CityThe friendship that can

cease has never been real

~Saint Jerome

BennyForget not that the

earth delights to feel your bare feet and the wind longs to play with

your hair.~Kahlil Gibran

Padmasambhava ~brought Buddhism to Tibet

There are some people in this world that can turn our days around...

Have you ever had a day where you just felt heavy, sulky, and had a need to complain, exaggerate, and act out? Well I have an antidote to those destructive attitudes. Through

years of research, scientists have discovered that with a small

supplement of this remedy, your bleak day will

immediately become one of the best you’ve ever had!

Hurray for Happiness!

THEIR HEARTS ARE

WARMER THAN THE SUN!

Ahhhh....if anyone knows me, Kaleb,

they’ll know I have a horrible memory. So I

will do my best to highlight this month’s

happenings.

Owl City Becomes Epidemic! Run for Your Lives!

Mauren, a good amount of weeks ago,

allowed me to listen to a song by a small

band called Owl City. As I listened

electronic waves crashed through the

speakers, pings and pongs rippled across

a placid medium of soothing voices,

caressing my drooling eardrums. Blossoms

of dew dropped flowers and summer filled

trees wetted my parched lips, a

cornucopia of audio fixation exposed my

ripe soul to the ultraviolet awareness of

enlightenment. I was hooked. This

electronica delivered most excellently. I

bought the CD, burnt a CD for my car and

put it on my ipod; just incase I forgot my

ipod or got it taken away at school, I would

have an extra copy. Oh yes, they’re that

amazing.

Anthony Cabrera became addicted

quickly after, eager to proclaim that he was

listening to Owl City as he left the school

parking lot. Which reminds me; I need to

burn him their new EP...

Mauren, we say this from the depths

of our musically starved heart, THANK

YOU! OH GOOD GOD, THANK

YOU! ...that should express

how we feel...

What the F#@% Magic Man at Emily Crossfield’s

18th B-Day!I went to Emily

Crossfield’s 18th B-Day

Party at her house this last

Sunday. It was wonderful,

you know, music, food, and

friends. Little did we know that

the dude from downtown, the Michael

Jackson looking mime guy, was going to

make an appearance. Not only is he hella’

creepy, he also made us dance. I’m for it,

but when we get in a 30 person chain,

fingers lanced together and performing

some kind of wave like jester to Thriller as

a mime critics are unskilled, “rusty” moves,

can be a little too much for this tall, freaky

blonde kid. In all, I had a wonderful time

laughing at myself and everyone else, we

all need that every once in a while!

Next was the magician. Yes yes,

remember the magician that came to your

9th birthday? Well, this wasn’t him.

Straight from the David Blaine spoof, this

guy was a f***ing demon. To my surprise

he left our un-cheezit drinks be,

however he did do some freaky-ass s**t.

When was the last time you saw

someone put a written on quarter in a

closed aluminum soda can? The last time

you saw someone stab a card you were

THINKING OF BLINDFOLDED? This guy

was so incredible I would have had his

magical demon hell-spawn. Any-who, the

party was awesome!

Emily I love you!

Uhhh....I can’t think of anything else at the

moment, I’m sure something awesome

happened this month, buuuut I can’t

remember! Cest la vie!

Oh wait! No New Coal!

THE UNIVERSAL DOWN-LOWSo what went on these past four weeks?

What the F David Blaine!

To Be the Change You Want in the World...

To our unsurprised surprise Cody Earthchild

has done it again. As a representative of the

student run coalition against the building

of new coal firing plants in Arkansas, he

made his debut on the white steps of

the Capitol sporting a stylish mask and

poster which did his speaking for him.

However he did speak. With the partnership

of Grace, a fellow AGS alum, they performed a

well said and inspiring speech to the hundred-

something crowd. We are very proud of

the progress we have made as a club,

coalition, and pack of friends. With just

a little preparation and enthusiasm, we

can change Zee Vorld! No New Coal!

No New Coal

Gurl!

NO FRIGGIN

NEW COAL!October 18th, 2009

At the State Capitol citizens from all over Arkansas gathered to make aware the impact of coal on their lives

and homes.And hey, the weather

was stellar, a good day for large scale disagreement!

Coal = Balls

I would have to agree

with my colleague.

Hey look it’s Ben, Flo,

and me! ;C)

Hamster Power Air Power Sun Power World Enlightenment

Healthy discontent is the

prelude to progress.~Gandhi

Namaste