Masquerading in Costumes Personas -...

Masqueradingin Costumes&Personas

October1, 2016

Janet Kuypers poetry showat Austin’s the Baha’i Center' '

MasqueradeYou asked me to the masqueradeand I willingly compliedbut I’m tired of wearing this dressfor the feathers in my costumewon’t stop licking my faceand you cannot see the tearsfalling behind my mask -

When you see the price they payI’m sure you’ll come and join the masquerade, you saybut the price is too highfor I don’t want to wear a maskwith you, and I would only hopethat I don’t have to.

. Janet Kuypers .October 1 , 2016

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Curiumfrom the “Periodic Table of Poetry” series (#96, Cm)written 10/23/13, edited 9/23/16 for 10/1/16 show

Searching through storagefor my wedding clothes,I ignored my white wedding dressand reached for the wedding veil.It might not be trueto my Halloween costume,but I had to wear somethingto show that my black dresswas actually a wedding dress.I’ll carry a small bunchof white flowersto make my otherwise “goth wedding”look complete, but still,I’ll have to explainthat my Halloween costumeis my interpretationof Marie Curieon her wedding day.

And okay, maybe it’s wasn’t goth,but a diligent work ethicthat caused Marie Curieon her own wedding dayto wear a black dress —she wore it so she could wear the same black dress later for her work.

And yeah, when she workedshe really got messy with herradioactive elements(ergo the black dress, I suppose)...

. Masquerading in Cotumes & Personas .cc&d chapbook

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She studied different levelsof radioactivityin different elements,she learned what wascausing the radiation.She even coined theterm “radioactivity,’while she discoveredthe two radioactive elementsradium and polonium.

But looking back on her life,maybe wearing the blackdress was appropriate,because she soaredin all the schoolingshe could legally take(at the time, she couldn’tenroll in a higher educationbecause she was female) —so she eventually had to goto underground learningfor higher educationin makeshift classroomsthat lasted only a few daysbefore a government raidwould cause the “schooling”to have to move again.She then left Poland for Paris,was able to go to school,but was still penniless and hungry.

But after her second degree,she met her Pierre,who worked with hereven after their marriage(where they gave each otherbicycles as wedding gifts).


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I know, I know, I’m goingon and on about Marie Curiefor my Halloween costume,and there’s even an elementnamed after her, that shedidn’t even discover.But Curium is actually one of themost radioactive elements,and Curium is now used to helpscientists learn and discover,much the way Marie Curie did.

Curium helps people, to helppower artificial pacemakers.But it’s even used in alpha-particleX-ray spectrometers that areinstalled on lunar and Mars roverslike the Sojourner or theSpirit and Opportunity rovers.It’s even used on a spacecraftto probe the surface of a comet.

So, Curium is dangerous,but it helps us learn,which makes Curium havea certain glow to it...Besides, both being a goth girland loving to dive into my workis really making me take a shineto this black wedding dress idea...And when I got this ideafrom a woman who struggled to succeedin her work and in science,it shows me how sciencefits perfectly with the entire world as well.


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This Halloweenthis halloween i got a costume togetheri wore a black page-boy wig, a vinyl dress and matching vinyl boots

it was strange for mei’m not such an outgoing person

and every time i was left alone at a barsomeone would hit on meusually someone uglybut i didn’t tell them to leave me alone:

i gave them a fake name, a fake number

and looking back, what made the differencewas not wearing the revealing clothesbut wearing a wig, changing my identity

and it’s not that i’d do it againbut i must admiti really like being someone elsejust for a little while


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t

o

This Halloween AgainI have no plans for theholiday this year. No parties.Well, none that I’m going to.I’m dressing up for Halloween,though, in something that almost doesn’t look like a costume.

I want to be a Scotsman for Halloween. Not because I’m Scottish, I’m not. Not because I’mmale, I’m not, In my costume, people may not even think I’m dressed up for Halloween. ButI’ll know.

I never did anything with you forHalloween. Well, when it wasHalloween a year or two ago I put on a wig and dressed up when I picked you up from the airport.

It’s funny how easy it is toremember little stories like that.

You were dressed as a cartooncharacter for Halloween last year.I never got to see you in that outfitI always thought Icould see it another time.


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I didn’t think you’d be gonebefore the next Halloween rolled aroundI thought you’d alwaysbe around, you always were, you know.When I needed to talk to you, I called. Or else you called me instead.It was almost likeI had a little brother there, whowas always willing to listen to me, who was always wanting to put up with me.

My question to you is this:were you always willing toput up with me? Did you think things would end this way?

Just so you know, wherever youare, that someone i am thinking aboutyou. Because I know the holidaysaren’t the same without you here.

I never thought about dressing upfor Halloween, or about Scotland,or even other countries, but you,well, you were Scottish, through and through, and you wanted a kilt, and you wanted the worldto know you were Scottish.


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I always thought you’d be aroundI thought, even whenyou aggravated me, that you wouldalways be there for me.

Now I just have to be there for myself.

I wonder how lonely people get,if they lose someone they were close to,do they feel like a piece of them ismissing too? Well, I do.

And I figure someone has to be aScotsman for Halloween, even ifthis year it has to be me


. 9 .

SalesmanThe doorbell rang.“Who could be stopping by at this hour?”,I thought, but I put my work downand walked to the door.A man in a plaid suit stood in the entrywaywith a worn book in his hand.His business suit seemed like a costumethat looked comicalfor this sad clown...I almost exptected to seea twirling bow tieor water to squirt outof the fake flower in his pocket,but he flashed me a tired, business-like smile.It almost seemed genuine.

As he rambled on and on about...Well, I don’t really know what he said.I don’t even know what he wanted.“What is he selling?”, I thought,and my head became dizzywith his confusing words.

Try to be nice to the strange man;he knocked on your door,and you felt obliged to greet him.


. 10 .

It all seemed like nonsense...You listened to his words;you tried to make senseof his nouns and his verbs,and when you heard fractionshe mentioned a call to action —

I didn’t like what I heard.But I tried to listen.I wanted to listen.But after a whileI had to hold on to the door frame:I had to keep myself steadywhile this man’s thoughtstried to knock me down.

I finally stopped him.“What are you trying to sell me?What are you trying to do?”, I asked.The man looked at me and said,“I’m trying to sell you an ideology.I am trying to poison your mind.”

I slammed the door in his face.Alone, I let go of the door frame.I fell down.


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Masquerading in Costumes &Personas

http://www.janetkuypers.com

Janet Kuypersscars publicationshttp://scars.tv!

published in conjunction with cc&dmagazinethe UN-religious, NON-family oriented literary and art magazine [email protected] http://scars.tv/ccdISSN 1068-5154 INTERNET ISSN #1555-1555

Writing Copyright © 2015 retained by the author.Design Copyright © 2015 Scars Publications and Design

Magazines: Children, Churches and Daddies (cc&d magazine), founded June 1993; Down in the Dirt, conceived 1994, founded 2000

Books: Hope Chest in the Attic, the Window, Close Cover Before Striking, (Woman.), Autumn Reason, Contents Under Pressure, the Average Guy’s Guide (to Feminism), Changing Gears, the Key to Believing, Domestic Blisters, Etc., Oeuvre, Exaro Versus, L’arte, The Other Side, The Boss Lady’s Editorials (regular and 2005 Expanded Edition), Duality, Seeing Things Differently, Change/Rearrange, Death Comes in Threes, Moving Performances, Six Eleven, Life at Cafe Aloha, Creams,Rough Mixes, The Entropy Project, The Other Side (2006 Edition), Stop., Sing Your Life, The Beauty and the Destruction, cc&d v167.5 (Writing to Honour & Cherish, editor edition), Blister & Burn (the Kuypers edition), S&M, cc&d v170.5 Dis-tinguished Writings editor edition, Living in Chaos, Silent Screams, Taking It All In, It All Comes Down, Rising to the Surface, Galapagos, Chapter 38 (v1, v2 & v3), Final ly, Literature for the Snotty and Elite (v1, v2 & part 1), a Wake-Up Call FromTradition, (recovery), Dark Matter: the Mind of Janet Kuypers, Evolution, (tweet), Get Your Buzz On, Janet & Jean Together, po•em, Taking Poetry to the Streets, the Cana-Dixie Chi-town Union, the Written Word, Dual, Prepare Her for This,Uncorrect, Living in a Big World, Pulled the Trigger, Venture to the Unknown, Janet Kuypers: Enriched, She’s an Open Book, “40”, Sexism and Other Stories, the Stories of Women, Prominent Pen (Kuypers edition), Elemental, the 2012 Date-book, Prominent Tongue, Chaotic Elements, Fusion, Stabity Stabity Stab Stab Stab, a Picture’s Worth 1,000 words (color art book and b&w art book), Life, in Color, Post-Apocalyptic, Burn Through Me, Under the Sea (photo book), Partial Nu-dity, Revealed, 100 Haikus, Give me the News, Let me See you Stripped, Part of my Pain, Rape Sexism Life & Death, Say Nothing, Twitterati, when you Dream tonight, the Periodic Table of Poetry, a year long Journey, Bon Voyage!, Sulphur & Sawdust, Slate & Marrow, Blister & Burn, Rinse & Repeat, Survive & Thrive, (not so) Warm & Fuzzy, Torture & Triumph, Oh., the Elements, Side A/Side B, Balance, Chaos Theory, Writing To Honour & Cherish, Distinguished Writings, Breaking Si-lences, Unlocking the Mysteries, the Book of Scars, We The Poets, Life on the Edge, Revealing all your Dirty Little Secrets, Decrepit Remains, Charred Remnants, Hope & Creation, Bending the Curve, Layers of Creation, Dark Matter, Survival of the Fittest, Crawling Through the Dirt, Laying theGroundwork, Weathered, echo, Ink in my Blood, (bound) (4 editions), Enriched Poetry, cc&d Enriched Prose, Enriched with Dirt, An Open Book, Literary Town Hall (2 editions), Prominent Pen (2 editions), 100 Words, 1,000 Words, the 2012 Literary Date Book, ItWas All Preordained, Cultural Touchstone, the Mission (issue edition and chapbooks edition), Purpose, Falling, Cheap Thrills, After the Apocalypse 2013 date book, After the Apocalypse (poery edition), After the Apocalypse (prose edition), Entanglement,Guilt by Association, don’t forget it, don’t listen. read., bare minimum, Poet as Sociopath, Drowning, Art is not Meant to be Touched, the Beaten Path, a New Pen, Need to Know Basis (redacted edition and extended edition), the “need to know”2015 literary date book, one Solitary Word, What Must be Done, Adrift, Salvation, the 2016 literary date book anthology, the Chosen Few, Sunlight in the Sanctuary, from Smoke, the Intersection, a Stormy Beinning, Clouds Ovr th Moon, Infamous in our Prime, Anais Nin: an Understanding of her Art, the Electronic Windmill, Changing Woman, the Swan Road, the Significance of the Frontier, The Svetasvatara Upanishad, Harvest of Gems, the Little Monk,Death in Málaga, Momento Mori, In the Palace of Creation, R.I.P., Bob the Bumble Bee, Remnants and Shadows, I Saw This, the Drive, Thomas at Tea, Crashing Down Nineteenth, Blue Collar Ballet, nopoem, In Your Heart the Apostrophe’s Teardrops ofGod, the Adventures of the Key to Believing Bear, Anais Nin: an Understanding of her Art (second printing), Deckard Kinder / Char lie Newman, 12 Times 12 Equals Gross, a Marble Nude Pauline Borchese with a Marble Apple in her Marble Hand, Chal-lenge of Night and Day and Chicago Poems, Lighten Up, Not Far From Here, Watershed, You Have Finally Won, Avenue C, Suburban Rhythms, Down Syndrome, the Dark Side of Love, The pill is a man’s best Friend, Angel’s Syllable Is GoodBoss of Devil’s Spine, Poems and Stories from The Blue Collar Book of the Dead, Cat People, Death of an Angel, Ghost, Science: A Curmudgeon’s View, Ghost Dancers Leaping from a Tome, the 4-D Window, Open Wounds, Anime Junkie, Inter-stice, Gunther, Cuts, Scream Cloud Island, When the World was Black and White, a Petal Under Pavement, The Holy See of CEE, Book 15 * Thailand to Volcanoes, Lost in an Echo, I Was Charles Bronson’s Secret Hostage, Erasable Bond, RoyalDano’s Death Scene ‘tis of Thee, Understood, Akashic Shotgun, Champagne - Hot Water, How a Bullet Behaves, the Thing in the Lounge at WagonWheel (I Come in Avarice), Postcards from Exile, the Five Stages of Macbeth, Stay in Formation,Shadowing Other Footprints, the Girl Next Door and Other Poems, Major Arcana, Sine Peoria Nulla est Gloria, Short Takes, Seeing Strangers, Re-Viewing Anais, The Tribes Joshua Drove Out of the Land, Butchery of the Innocent, Hammer-Chained, No Raft — No Ocean, Dancing at the Abyss, a nation of assholes with guns, the Blazing Hands of 100 Drummers, Make the Wind, , The Planner, the Corrosion, The Pyre On Which Tomorrow Burns, Cowboy Hats and Railways, Give What You Can, Come Fly with Me, Out of the Web, Don’t Tread on Me, Entering the Ice Age, Entering the Ice Age, the Line to Power, Fear the Forsaken, Falling Into Place, Unknown, Forever Bound, Exploding on the Scene, Moving theEarth, Autumn Again, Up In Smoke, No Return, Wrapping It Up, Link in th Chain, Shot out of a Cannon, Incisible Ink, a ew era, Idols, Friction, Sea Drift, and Then he Moved, Approaching Front, Beyond the Gates, the Curve of Arctic Air, Idea,a Mad Escape, Testament, the New Deal, the Captive and the Dead, When the Walls are Paper Thin, Nighttime City, Suggested Torture, Down in the Dirt v084, Clearing the Debris, Skeletal Remains, When the World Settles, Along the Sur-face, Into the White, Life... from Nothing, Down In It, Wake Up and Smell the Flowers, Looking Beyond, See the World Burn, America the Lost, Catch Fire in the Treetops, Wisdom in Broken Hands, Symbols Manifest, Grounded, Perfectly Im-perfect, I Pull the Strings, am I really extinct, Home at Last, Spiralling, a Rural Story, Treading Water, Black Cat, a Bad Influence, Too Many Miles, the Path of Least Resistance, hello goodbye goodbye hello, When the Walls are Paper Thin,Planets Apart, Planets Apart, Nighttime City, the Breaking, Syggested Torture, New moon, a Perfect Solitude, 6 Feet Under, The Hive, the 23 Enigma, Suicidal Birds, Being Real, the Blind Eye, the Relic the Effort the Yell

Compact Discs: Mom’s Favorite Vase the demo tapes, Kuypers the final (MFV Inclusive), Weeds and Flowers the beauty & the desolation, The Second Axing Something is Sweating, The Second Axing Live in Alaska, Pettus & Kuypers Live at Cafe Aloha,MPointless Orchestra Rough Mixes, Kuypers Seeing Things Differently, 5D/5D Tick Tock, Kuypers Change Rearrange, Order From Chaos The Entropy Project, Kuypers Six One One, Kuypers Stop., Kuypers Masterful Performances mp3 CD, Kuypers Death Comes in Threes, Kuypers Changing Gears, KuypersDreams, Kuypers How Do I Get There?, Kuypers Contact•Conflict•Control, the DMJ Art Connection the DMJ Art Connection, Kuypers Questions in a World Without Answers, Kuypers SIN, Kuypers WZRD Radio (2 CD set), Mom’s Favorite Vase and The Second Axing These Truths, assorted artists String Theory, Oh(audio CD), Life At The Cafe (3 CD set), the DMJ Art Connection Indian Flux, the DMJ Art Connection Manic Depressive or Something, Chaotic Radio Chaotic Radio Week #1, Chaotic Radio Chaotic Radio Week #2, Chaotic Radio Chaotic Radio Week #3, Chaotic Radio Chaotic Radio Week #4, Chaotic RadioChaotic Radio Week #5, Chaotic Radio the Chaotic Collection Collection #01-05 (5 CD set) etc. (audio CD, 2 CD set), Chaotic Elements (2 CD set), Chaos in Motion (6 CD set), 5D/5D Screeching to a Halt (EP), PB&J Two for the Price of One (EP), Kiki, Jake and Haystack An American Portrait, Kuypers/the Bas-tard Trio/Paul Baker/the JoAnne Pow!ers Trio Fusion (4 CD set), podcasts the Evolution of Performance Art (13 CD set), Kuypers Live (14 CD set), the DMJ Art Connection the Things They Did to You (2 CD set), Kuypers Seeing a Psychiatrist (3 CD set), Kuypers St. Paul’s (3 CD set), Kuypers the 2009 PoetryGame Show (3 CD set), Kuypers and the HA!man of South Africa Burn Through Me (2 CD set), Kuypers “40”, Kuypers Sexism and Other Stories, Kuypers the Stories of Women (amazon.com release), Kuypers “Dobro Veče” (4 CD set) Kuypers “hmmm” (4 CD set), Kuypers “Letting it All Out”, Kuypers “WhatWe Need In Life” (CD sngle), , Kuypers “Made Any Difference” (CD sngle), , Kuypers/Hardwick “Across the Pond” (3 CD set).

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