Mad, Bad or Rad: Achieving in the Academy with BiPolar disorder.

Original publication URL: http://researchbank.swinburne.edu.au/vital/access/manager/Repository/swin:37157

Bukker Tillibul: The Online Journal of Creative Writing Practice. Vol 7

(2013)http://bukkertillibul.net/Contents.html?VOL=7

Carol-Anne Croker

Mad, Bad or Rad? Achieving in the Academy with Bipolar Disorder :

Self as author and data

I have clinically diagnosed, and constantly monitored, Bi-Polar Mood Disorder (BD), lifetime prevalence, and can be viewed as mad (in the colloquial use of the term), bad (in the sense of challenging dominant academic paradigms) and indeed rad [ical] as evidenced by my public advocacy on this issue. Within my academic faculty I discovered a position of agency, where I chose to position myself, that of critical observer/ outsider.

I live with B D, this ‘illness’ or gift as I perceive it. It is the driving motivation behind my PhD, my novel and all my hoped for and longed-for post PhD research. It is/will be my ‘contribution to new knowledge’ in the field of Creative Writing

This is my space, my personal field of expertise. As a performer with Bipolar Disorder I know how included I felt within the Arts Community and how we felt protected by a veil of secrecy about our ‘madness’, it was almost a desirable trait for perceived greatness. My PhD has become a matter of uniting my own lived experience in my professional life with the lived experience of my private life through the exegetical reflective process.

This is the material I bring to my novel writing, a hybrid form combining memory, movie fragments, conversations, overheard insults, and the confused concept of being a ‘normal’ Australian, as if there could have been such a character for portrayal.

My chosen Artefact title is Walking with Madness, is a story of three such women society deemed mad, bad or radical. The characters are each in their own way ‘mad’ and can be clinically diagnosed within classifications listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th. Edition.(American Psychiatric Association; PhD writer's journal)

However it is the supposed gender-specificity or prevalence of some disorders or the sexist labelling of them for example nymphomania, and hysteria to name just two, within Western societies that forms the ‘meta-narrative’ of the story itself, a sub-textual positioning gleaned through my lived experience, necessarily explained within my accompanying exegetical writings.

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My childhood and adolescent soundscapes have only recently re-entered my conscious memory and not through psychiatric therapy but through writing my novel. As part of the journaling and creating of my plots and character narratives, I have been confronted with my own decisions taken in life, the reproducing of similar gender role patterns and masculinities of my childhood and early adult life looking at this as raw material for my creative practice. These concepts of ‘displacement’ move through my narratives and form the emotional-landscape for my novel included as the ‘personal geography’ for my female protagonists. This process in itself has been learning the craft of writing the imperative to ‘tame’ personal ‘hurts’, and memories then converting them into scenes.

One character in the novel Sarah is heavily based upon my own experiences. As a novitiate-fiction writer I have heeded the advice of so many professional writers to write what I know, so I have turned my arts-practitioner eye on what is now the character of Sarah as so many well-known scriptwriters, screen-writers, playwrights and novelists have done before me. She is at once me and not I and my ‘ethnographic eye’ can no longer ignore its prominence in my PhD studies and the centrality this critical self-reflection plays in the process,

...how the chronic, self-circling “I” performs an early act of

mutating into the impersonal roving Eye. The Eye swings

outwards experimentally into the surrounding darkness, questing,

registering, plundering the signs and signals of others...then

homes back like an excited fledgling to spill it’s trophies into the

maw of the waiting intelligence, who organizes the small bounty

into communicable shape and passes it on to a friendly reader.

(Gail Goodwin qtd in Halpern:p67)

This is my lived experience and part of my life that I always assumed would be irrelevant to my much hoped for tertiary studies.

In writing these women I have discovered that they all have parts of me within their character construction. Through understanding of my own Bipolarity, I now recognise BD traits in all three characters. To write characters drawing so heavily on my own experience was perceived by supervisors to be ‘risky’ for myself emotionally and for them as untrained in mental illness pastoral care. Also there remains the unspoken fear of litigation on the part of a University should such a PhD candidate become

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severely ill , or even attempt suicide.(Webb:2003; Banagan, Hecq and Theiler)

Across these years I was developing what I can now see as tacit knowledge, in terms of skill acquisition and my very sense of self. The time was the seventies and women around the world protested against patriarchy but I felt powerless to do so and remained complicit (and to a degree compliant) after completing my secondary studies by doing the class/gender-trajectory attending a Teachers College to pursue a feminized career.

This is the feminized life trajectory is the sub-text of my novel, and the major component of my PhD. I want to give these suburban girls a voice and show the lack of agency society seemed to command. Chakravarty has been the one theorist speaking directly to me since beginning this doctorate, and her words continue to drive my quest to learn the craft of novel writing:

The question of genre intersects with ideas of how the

contemporary in ways that throw up some crucial questions. How

for instance, does a writer remodel the generic conventions

available to her to accommodate the realities of her own location

in time and place? What happens when a writer has access to

more than one literary tradition on account of her hybrid identity?

(Chakravarty:14)

Thus coming to writing my novel, particularly the character of Sarah, the ‘self’ of my hybrid fiction, has meant returning and examining all aspects of my personal geography to look at how my constructions of gender and appropriate career pathways, a self-described, ‘creative’ could in fact be the foundation upon which my PhD is built.

This encapsulates the divergence of foci occurring throughout the years of my PhD, and indeed informing my research into my original thesis question, ‘Writing fiction/faction: A feminist analysis of voice’. My initial conception of this hypothesis if you like, is that by writing not a memoir but a hybrid genre of fiction, considered generically creative non-fiction I would be able, in my accompanying exegesis to investigate the voice of the author within the story and the construction of the story.

It wasn’t till well into my PhD program I realised that the subjective “I” was not just within the two pieces of text to be analysed and theorised. My construction of ‘self’ both inside and outside the academy needed to be given voice, thus my exegesis title is incomplete. Whilst assuming a

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feminist standpoint theory analysis of my own text, situated within a similar analysis of other popular women’s fiction texts and the newer hybrid faction texts in the market would constitute my exegetical reading and reflection, this has proven to not be the case. It was also not simply a matter of situating and emphasising authorial voice but also the embodiment of self, as laid bare in the written components of the PhD. Thus my own bipolarity needed to be simultaneously extracted from lived experience but then re-constructed and re-embodied within the character development inside the artefact and structure of my novel itself.

For my creative writing I focus on the lives of three women with Affective Disorders, none clinically diagnosed at the beginning of the narrative. Indeed each were judged and labelled by society as deviant in a gendered manner rather than a psychological framing.

Despite thinking that the notion of ‘self’ I chose to illuminate through the character of Sarah in my novel was sufficient to allow for such analytical reflection on the writing craft I can now see that this was a hesitancy to position myself as researcher under my own theoretical lens.

Having successfully navigated two Bachelor degree programs, two Post-graduate Diplomas, one undergraduate Diploma , two bridging courses of Certificate IV and of course a Master of Arts (Creative Writing) at this very institution where I am currently enrolled, there has never been a need for me to actually examine just how much impact my own BD has on my studies. Success and achievement to me was about slugging it out, riding through the storm of illness, hiding the depressive cycles and partying through the mania with many of my written submissions completed in these long hours of sleeplessness. To me the PhD process would continue along a similar trajectory, yet this has not proven to be the case.

It has been far harder to negotiate my studies and to ignore (what I now recognise as) my own cyclothymia. The external stressors, role conflicts of daily living have combined with the apparent ‘normal’ periods of self-doubt experienced by many a PhD candidate, and more importantly articulated by mature-aged women candidates to make this indeed a psychiatric, emotional and psychological storm encountered. (Haynes et al., 2012 ; Jonas and Croker, 2012)

The PhD candidature itself has been well researched throughout the years of my doctoral candidature in many, many academic journals; particularly in our Discipline of Creative Writing, both in Australia and internationally. (Jiranek, 2011; Nutov and Hazzan, 2011; Holley, 2011; Grover, 2007; Ali and Kohun, 2009)

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The following [figure 1] cited in (Wong , 2008:50) demonstrates the varying academic stressors and scholarship mastery expected within a successful doctoral program of studies.

FIGURE 1: FLOWCHART OF THE HEURISTICALLY CRITICAL REFLECTIVE PRACTITIONER APPROACH (REASON AND

BRADBURY: 2001)

By superimposing the four stages of PhD candidacy; unconsciously incompetent, consciously incompetent, unconsciously competent, consciously competent, as discussed by Wong (2008:50) theorising all such candidatures irrespective of mode or model, with the dynamic reflexive lenses of the PhD by artefact and exegesis, I can see precisely how my own experience can be encapsulated inside this under-researched concept of the ‘PhD journey’ as mirroring Wong’s ‘living thesis paradigm’.

Figure 2 depicts a clearer perception of how ‘the self as PhD scholar’ is implicitly situated within each of the conceptual spaces, particularly at times of crisis in self-confidence, ‘rudderless’ within the intersecting ‘currents’ or at times even ‘becalmed and directionless’. For PhD by artefact and exegesis scholars, the lack of clarity between the practice in the academic writing and the craft and practice of the creative writing can

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be visually mapped. As noted by Wong “it also demonstrates the problems of combining critical social theory with a reflective phenomenological approach”. (Wong:48) This diagram assumes a sense of self-competence as stable throughout the PhD candidature, whereas in my experience as hypothesised by Wong, periods of academic and personal instability can manifest at each arrow points reflected by the following proposed ‘ideal’ model.

FIGURE 2 FLOWCHART OF THE REFLECTIVE PRACTICES METHODOLOGY (REASON AND BRADBURY: 2001)

In Australia we have a four year full-time ideal/desired completion timeframe which seems often found silenced underneath notions of academic capability and progress. These pedagogically silent yet institutional dominant discourses in my experience can be articulated and positioned ontologically by overlaying the theoretical ‘Living Thesis Paradigm’ (Wong, 2008) with my journal writing as research data.

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My representation [figure 3] is premised upon the accepted heuristics of qualitative action research as illustrated (Reason and Bradbury, 2001) in concert with Wong’s paradigm.

I felt that progressing through these three stages of research methodology (ethnographic reflective practice, data analysis, and reflective interpretation) not clearly articulated as a linear trajectory the language in my writer’s journals. What constantly dominated posts and threads was the pressure to validate my creative writing practice by fighting the very heuristic nature of this model of PhD. Nor could I see a way to integrate any type of linear progression through my own cyclothymia within this logical, sequential and ‘objective’ externalised, disembodied expectation of PhD candidature.

Wong proposes that the scholar’s self-confidence is not stable, in which the academic and personal spaces are in flux. Unlike the implied linear progression from unconsciously incompetent (the novice researcher), to the consciously competent (academic colleague), in my experience with PLR modes of candidature is there remains an underlying juxtaposition between what is considered academically competent and what constitutes the competency required within the scholar’s professionally-based creative practice with the former privileged over the second.

Initially this aspect of flux and perceptions of incompetence negatively impacted upon my ability to study when I perceived that I was working in this contested academic space. The theoretical and epistological debates between methods of qualitative research inquiry within the creative arts coincided with academic periods I perceived, as lacking a cohesive disciplinary discourse within language of the academy or even the arts and humanities disciplines. This ontological instability did nothing to provide a stable footing upon which to measure one’s own competency trajectory.

Yet, in hindsight, it was precisely these periods of instability and flux which did allow me space to locate myself and reflect on just when and where my cyclothymia sat within Wong’s four phase model, and to be able to demonstrate quite empirically through my writers journal, e- published wellness blog, and Facebook status updates, exactly how my candidature was impacted by my BD.

In the ideal PhD candidature Wong’s four phases would match or overlay the Australian four-year model, but for a writer/researcher with BD, this is not the case. From my journal writing I have found that within each of Wong’s four sequential stages I experienced periods of mania and depression, interspersed with periods of balanced mood states and

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precise dosages of medications. Thus my self-competency reflections were not always consistent with notions of academic linear progression.

My analysis began with my own graphic representation of my spaces of conflict and dissonance, which accord very closely with those articulated by mature-women PhD candidates in Creative Writing during my focus groups and interviews conducted during a year off from studies working on a commissioned research report. (Jonas and Croker, 2012)

Central to my mind-mapping and graphic representation was the centrality of embodied knowledge, self awareness, wellness or indeed period of illness. By mapping also four separate life stressors, those outside my own control which impact on my own academic expectations and productivity, which in turn are impacted upon and affect my own cyclothymia and management of my wellness.

Of the five intersecting circles in my diagrammatic representation of candidature for students with BD, three need me to mobilize all I have learned about myself through cognitative behaviour therapy in conjunction with reliance upon specialist medical support and intervention. The fourth circle represents active reliance upon my own capacity to control and position myself within ‘safe’ study and ‘safe’ writing spaces. Finally the overarching fifth is the desired balanced, stable mood states, when I have located a complementarity between task and output for PhD successful completion, my period of consciously competent if you will.

Often the polarities of mood states are influenced heavily by factors outside the academy. I suffer from seasonal adjustment disorder, and find myself at the onset of winter having to work so much harder just to rise from bed to face a day, let alone contribute worthwhile and rigorous academic writing.

In these mood states it was all I could do to marshal the strength and fortitude to do the ‘academic grunt work’; the literature searches and bibliographic entries into my citation manager. The next step of reading all the texts, with a clarity of understanding and conceptualising how they fed into my PhD was another matter all together and totally impossible to produce extensive or cohesive researcher summaries.

All I could mass together was ‘gut responses’ to the various authors recognising when something either ‘sat comfortably with my experience’ or made me angry by the juxtaposition with my own experiences: as woman, madwoman, older-woman, single-mother, aged-carer, tutor, academic writer, novitiate fiction writer, and PhD candidate.

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Another period of depressive crisis is around Christmas and the

University’s summer shut down, when the full-time academics

often take their annual leave, including PhD supervisors. This

depression is situated in a number of spaces, mostly external to

the academy and in the realm of the domestic. I feel further

isolated by the mass-marketed concept of family togetherness. I

have no living family in close proximity, and live in a holiday

resort suburb where families gather and friends join them for

beachside stopovers. The crowds make me anxious and even

tempt me to hide within my home to not have such familial and

social connectedness literally, in my face. At the University my

isolation is further reinforced as during holidays there are no-

support network, either peers or academic staff, requiring a

commute is two hours each way to study alone in the research

hub opened for me by security. (Croker, 2010)

I usually end up hospitalised at this time of year, where I strive to continue my studies. Yet again I remain an outsider even within the psychiatric ward; one pretending to the others and myself, that I am still a functioning ‘normal’ human being. These are the main periods of my acknowledged incompetence, when my brain chemistry is ensuring my self-talk is all about how useless, misguided and delusional I am to even contemplate being a PhD student, let alone seeing a valid reason to keep fighting the battle with my illness.

Then there are the productive times of “competence” when I strive to ride the slowly escalating waves of mania. This is when I write prolifically and give my academic peers the impression that ‘I have it together’ and am further advanced in my academic writing than I actual am. This is when my inner performer comes to the fore. The tacit knowledge I bring to academic conference podiums from my Performing Arts career get me over this progress-measure of candidature. Yet I feel like the Wizard of Oz, hidden behind a veil of secrecy and showmanship pedalling as fast as I can to stop my academic peers pulling back the curtain to reveal the insecure small person frantically twisting the mechanics of the conference and academic ‘performance’.

After the emotional highs of such public displays of bravado and occasionally of academic insight usually throughout a hypo manic phase, I

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fall instantly into the predictable depression just when all these presentations need to be converted into refereed academic journal articles for publication and career development. Self –sabotage or a complete disregard for the importance of my mental wellness within these pivotal periods of candidature? What was perceived by one supervisor as either incompetence or self-sabotage, was in fact my lack of willingness to work in harmony with my cyclothymia, and to utilize the reflexive spaces of this model of PhD in synergy with the work tasks desired and able to be produced.

Cyclothymic influences mapped against Wong’s phases of (in) competency

Wong’s phases of competency

FIGURE 3: SELF AS DATA, MAPPING CYCLOTHYMIA AND MOOD STATE LABILITY ON SUCCESSFUL PHD

CANDIDATURE (2007 – 2012)

So by revisiting my diagrammatic representation of my PhD I now understand where these labile mood states are located and have given me a sense of agency to work around and through them towards completion of my PhD. Based upon my diagram of stressor factors for all

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research by higher degree candidates and my own mapping via a cyclothymia mood chart, scaled from -5 (clinical depression through ‘normalcy’ to +5 (mania). Both extreme mood states required in-hospital medication adjustment and re-education of my own holistic wellness routines. Thus I can see exactly what factors came into play during Wong’s phases of incompetence. The ‘unconsciously incompetent’ phases did correspond primarily with periods of hypomania, and the ‘consciously incompetent phases’ aligned with the depressive end of my mood scale graph.

This ability to locate my mood states both in time and within the academic progress timelines and expectations allowed me the insight to change supervisors late into the candidature, in my fifth year (after having taken a twelve month leave of absence) I can now reflect on whether the stints of illness and hospitalization was worth the personal sacrifice and emotional effort. I have had to regain a sense of what intrinsically motivated me to commence this course of study in the first place, uniting and building upon my already completed qualifications and expertise.

Much has been written by academics about the perceived nexus between madness and creativity and as yet there remains a lack of agreement on the reasons why certain affective disorders appear to be associated with, or spoken about by particular creative artists and professional practice. Whilst there remain no definitive measures of prevalence of affective disorders in the sub-section of the broad community recognised as creative artists, much research is ongoing in the field with one major study investigating this perceived negative aspect of creativity and art creation, The Dark Side of Creativity. As Cropley...pointed out,

...creativity involves essentially destructive processes such as

questioning received wisdom or rejecting what already exists.

These are regarded as good and desirable, that is to say, as

positive or falling on the bright side, when they foster personal

growth, but when they go wrong, they lead to disorder and chaos.

Thus what is needed is a system for understanding where and

how it crosses to the dark side.(Cropley et al., 2010 :362)

It is this ‘dark side’ that receives much discussion at writing conferences, particularly in the genres of life writing, and memoir. This notion of darkness and danger accompanies many public discourses surrounding premature celebrity deaths connected to post-mortem findings of

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substance abuse, overdose or suicide. This has built up over the years and has plagued performing arts academics working with “The Method”.

The myth surrounding the acting theories of Stanislavski at the Moscow Art Theatre, as adopted and expanded upon by New York acting coach Lee Strasberg as “The Method” school of training, and has remained the dominant discourse for acting training in New York by famed directors, Stella Adler and Stanford Meisner at the Group Theatre even today.

The Method has many detractors, predominantly theorists and academics from the psychology disciplines, particularly those using Freudian analytical frames in our Universities who argue that “the recall of past emotional experiences....call it an unhealthy invasion of the actor’s psyche.”(Carnicke,2008 :157) Yet this acting training has enabled me to ‘go to the dark places’ (Cropley et al., 2010; Kaufman and Sternberg; Kaufmann, 2003) safely and be able to externalise the primary experience into secondary experiences

...thereby minimizing the distinction between “concrete” and

“abstract” memories” [so that] ...These “more accessible,

repeatable feelings “prompt our memory of emotion” and create

the illusion of first time experiences, not their reality (SSII

1989:292). Memory safely filters and controls emotion,

maintaining artistic distance between the actor and the event

portrayed. It is the “crucible”, Stanislavski writes, in which

emotion is turned into art (SSII 1989:290). (Carnicke 2008:158)

This has been the tacit knowledge and skill set I have mobilized as transferrable knowledge for writing my PhD artefact. I have been able to revisit trauma memories, or primary memories (pervichnyi) through my writer’s journal, then filter them through Stanislavski’s method of actor training I have received throughout my career on stage, to become secondary memories (povtornyi) as the raw material for the plots and scenes within my novel, and finally by constructing strong characters with complete backgrounds, life histories and personality traits (many of which I have experienced or seen within my friends) as a writer I can bring a third layer of distance, that of the ‘repeated’ or abstract memory.

Admittedly there have been tears rewriting the more disturbing memories of my life, but less in the sense of traumatic response, and along the lines of catharsis a purging within the artistic process of creation. Thus Sarah is not me, nor is Julia or Dina. They, as characters, have use of my controlled and mediated memories but is service now only as literary devices and

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techniques subservient to the overall narrative. I am writing within s safe space despite the fears expressed by my early PhD supervisors. I have a skill set that must be mobilized and utlilised to take my readers into the dark places of madness, without succumbing to my illness. Perhaps I may need to draw upon the energy of the hypo manic phase to pull this off successfully, but it can only be effectively translated to the page in a stable mood state. Thus I can now safely say that my cyclothymic periods have not in fact hindered my creative process in so much as been unrecognized initially, and marginalized as part of my academic candidature, when in fact the reflexive PhD model is perfect for scholars such as myself with strong and proven effective wellness programs, a capable medical support team, acceptance on the need for adapting medication levels and most importantly the support of a supervisor who understands and does not fear my need to go to the extremities of mood states throughout the journey.

With the end in PhD candidature in sight, I need to revisit and reconceptualised precisely what I had expected to gain from my PhD and what in fact is a logical and valuable outcome from having pursued it. It occurs to me now that beyond the extrinsic goal of re-entering the workforce post diagnosis and career-break another bigger passion was driving me.

Throughout the candidature I knew I was working is a ‘field of inquiry’ based upon my previous academic success and expertise, that of the performing arts practitioner and critic using the tools of analysis of cultural products, through theoretical lenses and academic analytical thinking.

My extrinsic reward was always expected to be sought from the process of academic acceptance through ‘peer review’ and analytical debate however this was not enough in and of itself to fulfil the criteria of ‘socially responsible reporting’.

What drove my selection of creative artefact themes, and character developments was, and remains, the issue of mental illness and the changing nature of societal stigma despite increased awareness of mental illnesses. My exegesis was to prove to the ‘establishment’ that ‘we’ (those of us with Affective Disorders) can function within a supportive and highly prestigious professional career, or even survive a less than ideally supportive environment, simply by bringing our illness to the forefront of discussions and making audible the unspoken and unheard discourses of the Community and workplace, thus demanding equality of access.

My goal for post submission of this PhD is within an ongoing role of research, activism and advocacy. Having just begun the research into the

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multiple sites of deviance held by people with mental illness and my subsequent analysis into the function of groups or the socio-political dynamics of inclusion and exclusion demonstrate clearly the need for ‘ethics of such social responsibility’. My immediate aspiration is to succeed with my PhD allowing for a space where such research and activism can bring about change and acceptance in the new millennium. If even one life can be saved by having read my novel or exegesis it has fulfilled its purpose, as Kay Redfield Jamieson’s Touched with Fire 1993 and An Unquiet Mind (1995) saved mine and encouraged me to re-enter the paid workforce and tertiary education system.

Works cited:

Ali, Azad, and Frederick Kohun. "Cultural Influence on Social Isolation in Doctoral Programs and Doctoral Attrition-a Case Study." Information Systems Education Journal 7.64 (2009): 1-7. Print.

American Psychiatric Association, ed. Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. 4 ed. Washington, DC: APA, 2000. Print.

Banagan, R , D and S Hecq, and S Theiler. "Dancing the Tango within a Triangle: Framing Agendas in Postgraduate Pedagogies." New Writing 9.1 (2012): 42-52. Print.

Carnicke, Sharon Marie. Stanislavsky in Focus : An Acting Master for the 21st Century. 2008. <http://SWIN.eblib.com.au/patron/FullRecord.aspx?p=356388>.

Chakravarty, Radha. Feminism and Contemporary Women Writers: Rethinking Subjectivity. New Delhi: Routledge Taylor Francis, 2008. Print.

Croker, Carol-Anne. "Phd Writers Journal." Carol-Anne's Wellness Blog. http://cacroker.blogspot.com.au/: eBlogger, 2010. Blogging PhD studies with Bipolar Disorder to chart Cyclothymia. Vol. 2010. Print.

Cropley, David H., et al. The Dark Side of Creativity. 2010. <http://SWIN.eblib.com.au/patron/FullRecord.aspx?p=542765>.

Grover, Varun. "Successfully Navigating the Stages of Doctoral Study." International Journal of Doctoral Studies 2 (2007). Print.

Halpern, Daniel, ed. Who's Writing This? Fifty-Five Writers on Humor, Courage, Self-Loathing, and the Creativity Process. New York: The Ecco Press, 1995. Print.

Haynes, Cliff, et al. "My World Is Not My Doctoral Program...Or Is It?: Female Students' Perceptions of Well-Being." International Journal of Doctoral Studies 7 (2012). Print.

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http://SWIN.eblib.com.au/patron/FullRecord.aspx?p=542765%3E

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Holley, Karri A. "A Cultural Repertoire in Doctoral Education." International Journal of Doctoral Studies 6 (2011). Print.

Jiranek, Vladimir. "Potential Predictors of Timely Completion among Dissertation Research Students at and Australian Faculty of Sciences." International Journal of Doctoral Studies 5 (2010). Print.

Jonas, Tammi, and Carol-Anne Croker. "The Research Education Experience: Investigating Higher Degree by Research Candidates' Experiences in Australian Universities, May 2012." 2012. Print.

Kaufman, J. C., and R. J. Sternberg, eds. Cambridge Handbook of Creativity. New York: Cambridge University Press, 2010. Print.

Kaufmann, G. "Expanding the Mood-Creativity Equation." Creativity Research Journal 15.2/3 (2003): 131. Print.

Nutov, Liora, and Orit Hazzan. "Feeling the Doctorate: Is Doctoral Research That Studies the Emotional Labor of Doctoral Students Possible?" International JOurnal of Doctoral Studies 6 (2011). Print.

Reason, Peter, and Hilary Bradbury. "Handbook of Action Research : Participative Inquiry and Practice." (2001): 468 pp.

Webb, Jen. "Depression and Creative Writing Students." TEXT 7.1 (2003). Print.

Wong, Edward Sek. "Explication of Tacit Knowledge in Higher Education Institutional Research through the Criteria of Professional Practice Action Research Approach: A Focus Group Case Study at an Australian University." International Journal of Doctoral Studies 3 (2008). Print.

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Mad, Bad or Rad: Achieving in the Academy with BiPolar disorder.

Education

Transcript of Mad, Bad or Rad: Achieving in the Academy with BiPolar disorder.