by Art SanSomrr

I ONCE I-\~\/ ~6RffN-IN-O~E.I

- ---- - -.--.--- ··DYYOung and DrakeIN AN AGE or: AJ..ARM CLOCKS. WIJ.Y

SIJ.OJL.D IT TAKE YOU 40MINUTES TO CSETOUT 01= BED

IN TI-1EMORNING?!

~ ~!-lOW F\BOL)TYOJ, Tf\O~M'Pl£, f-\I\V£

'(OJ E..Vf-R(~E. Cl(Y.£ TO f£1Tlf\lC:,

1\ 1-\CX£.-1~-OOe,I-\~ ?~

DILBE-Rf ~y Scott Aaams~

0u

U~tOCUSEOHERE'S THE. A.GENOA.uTl-\tS REMINOS f'l\E. OF<

WHA.T...•

0u

BOSSTHE. HR5T ~OUR WILL"t"\'< FIRST :rOB)BUORE.EX.ACTLY

ldj

u

~EU.B.R·1P\SUSUAL.

'"CRASH OUf'I\t"\tES WERE

~[5U.~.f\.?RA.MBlING.~

~" '"

58)0

POPULAR.MAN. !~ ONL '<" >-,

>- SPENT A.. fORTUNE. ON.""INUTES0 u

u

'"

..

I\SPtR1.N .TO GO.

.~ ))

w

IJ.ON NICE,A Rt\~TY!=OR 'wtlUR 2£+'1'''

ANNIVERSARY

-, H""E~BrPlO"'RiiNTl:LO~S"'E"R'---

BLONDIE

SHOOT! ou~ CI-lECI<INS ACCOUNTWAS ~INED BECAUSE A CHECK

~ ~ ~WE DEPOSITEDI ~ ~ 1'001< OVER

..... .., I=IVE DAYS_','" TO CL.~!

v-

I NEED T'O

TN::£ m C!\.yOfF F~PE.R:so.w..~1

rHE BORN LOSER

BLONDIE

,--..

I FE!.!. ASI.EeP ON T~E SOFA.AFTE~ DINN~ AND NOBODY

Ii I WOKE ME UP~I~.

cwU=I.Ufo.rs.nt.~I~ M'iting thW-my ~.

BEETLE BAILEY----.. ---

By Mort Walker

CAN I BORROW

THERE'S NOTf04INC;I$20 TO GO TOTO DO IN CAMP.

TOWN~

CAN I BORROW"tYOUR RADIO'? I:Eij:~rE~\:.: WWW.CARTOON.ORG

BEETLE BAILEY

By Mort Walker

THESE JOKES ARE

TH EV SAY THEREPRETTY OLD!

ARE ONLY SevENBASI C JOKES INTHE WORL.D

BEETLE BAiIEY-

SU~E, SUT LETtS60 TO THE

MATJIo-lEE, IT'SCHeAPER

ARLO AND JANIS by JImtny J ohnsoff

By MortWalker

ADAM by Hnan Hassett - -----

ADAM by Brian Bassetl;--

WIZMDOFID

·,tc ~

~~~~

.. -...•.....-._~I~~~

~1fi6 E;VAAP ~L~ "e­OVT Of THE QUE5T'ON

8yBra"rPal'ker and Johnny tWt.-a.ATOIII ~ •.

By Brant Pariter and. Johnny Hart

:I SENTetU:e

YDIIT0500~OF CQt\MIINITY

~V,CE

1

~

•••(I,T' IT ~ AMP .e Xre~Ie-NCE­Se~T'O"~

~YoNDCOll4nEtteNsloH

sHOE· oy Jeff MacN elly

WIZARD OF ID

IIg

IJ::iif ,J 1I

BECAUSE FIVE WOMENAAYE EXQ.lANG£D WIN!

FOR ALIN1ONV.

WIZARD OF 10

DILBERT

1'1"\ M~KtNG$."2.00,000 PER'(EARl

- --

FOX TROT by Bill Amend

rA~

By Brant Parker and Johnny Hart

By Scott AClllma

~PP~RE.~ILYT,",~T'S ALL1 KNOW.

(8eep)"(DO HAVE 1

NEW MES5A6E.

"

01 •• AnnlIGIIltlt UIMfIII

(Beep)"tbO HAVE2

NEW M£SSM£S.

\

eoao •••••••• ,RoGER FOX.

"'IbU HA"E

'O,~83~ MtSSAr.ES.

?

MARCUS? IlMlNIC "!bURMouSE BuTToN

MI&HT BESTuck.

\

~~~

M&SSot6l a.1b:RFoll

SUIJ: 1"""PLANNIN6\'lIEETIN6 •••

~

TANK MCNAMARA

TANK MCNAMARA

o

i,

~.'t'iIIIi

by Jeff Millar & Bill Rinas.. ....:...

, wA"'c~ Fcot E)a.\I~GAMEy, FIVE MAX.

By Jeff Millar & Bill Hinds

by Jeff Millar & Bill Hinds,:

_ESBURYDYG3.rry--,ruat;~~

Si?~ IJ/!iIiIIIHf//IIfWiIN6 WITHMCAMPA/6N.a.rn;ea:N1IIMf' APE>rJ(J

IUE~

DQONESIURY by Garry Trndeau

__ III by Uarry 'lrudeau

--~--.--- -

~ by Garty Trndeau

~-~---- -- --by Jeff Millar & Bill Hinds

... ~~'l'0UN6 f'I;OPLE:Wl'fl4 J.lAW­PA1N"fWt.kJ~'f~'I'~oP IN"fOSol.O'f lO f>I''fE:R'f~ E:WOF~ AALF­1""'1N6 IN E:AcJ.I6AME: IN 'f~MAJORlO.

--

"Whoa I Not so fast, hotshotl The librariansays you're not graduating until you returnthe copy of ••G•.••• egga and Ham" you've

had out since March of 11881"

G WWW.UpprIIS. L·""I: Co!;CLOSE TO HOME

i

w'wwueJ(press.com

1121,191.38

rHO;·"M·CCH ·WE,VE.ISPENT ON THE. KIDS.50FAR

RHOhfD,~T13 R AD

~'/f

"OK, let's see ... peas, meatloaf, potatoesand milk. We'll say $3.50. Oh, walt,

you had seconds! didn't you; Brad?"

~: CIOSetohOmee compuserve.co",••!lI;;

(CLOSE TO HOME JOHN MCPHERSON

I!

(

A HUNDRED BUCKS FOR

A DIAPER?I'b' WHAT KINO QoC'DE PI?A VE INDI VIDUAL ••••.I'LL GIVE YOU 875,

AHD IT 8ETTE~ HAVE VELCRO TABS!

On her flight from New York to Paris,Paula falls victim to a diaper scalper.

E- I?QfI" (IOSPfO/'J(Jf'?f?QCOfTJ,f'Y/.-erve.(()("rl www.uexprlss.com

CLOSE TO HOME JOHN MCPHERSON

IJ-II

"-3

JOHN MCPHERSO!'-l'

<01997 John McPherson/Ois!. by Universal Press SyndiCltt

•••••••••••• ely, then wiDbe no cod-of .••••••••• thl. year. Instead, you'll ••••

•••• ,.pon book containing $1,500 ••••••••• , ••••••this brochure titled 'Howto ••••••

Your OwnHeating Oil.'"

CLOSE TO HOME by John McPherson

"I'm collecting for Larry Shumskl's get-well gift.Which donation should I put you down for?Homeboy, $25; nodding acquaintance, $10;

or tightwad scum, $51"

~&1:fl1K"

E:CLOSE roNOME@compuserve.comIIno3

CLOSE TO HOME

( ( (

~~8IUS

••••l.8.1_by Gary Brookins

"Whoal Come on, lolli That gap II wayfoo narrowl'tbu know the rule: IIx IncheI, mwm ••••••

v

l5E'rvl'.?COfTl

"

'1'.

~. ."\11. ~ __ ' ..

"\ l~~ I . .' .

' "" A1\-'\f"vtv,\\V •.v,.,I ~\lI'.\f" \ v'1,1~'\'\V\\ "'~,\ ~1It 'I :ill I

1~

Hdl/JFVdr

~LOSETO HOME,,> '-" 6:41

It

~ v~

!!lIa~SE:c:osetohome13com,

••••• on

I

-"'''1IIIII~Ii

-=Wj I

-~IIse;:.- CItr. VA. I.-'='=- ~-w.~=- I•Apluaer'stlel •••• It ••

••••••••••••••••

PI.I~~•••••• by Gary Br00kin8

PLUGGERS by Gary Brookins I!jJIIjIiIjI_I

You're a plugger if you take time to drive tothree places to save 75 cents on a cae of

motor oil.

"Great move calling in sick the last two days!

Everyone in your office did a lottery pool yesterday., .

They hit the Lotto fOt $27 million today'" I. ,

I

(

~ by Gary Brookins

•....-

(CLOSE TO HOME ' JOHN MCPHERSON

Il'ir~CJI9!l7John _ll,st. byU"""••••P,•••5_ Www.~c:om

Pl.UC.:Dby Gary HrooklnS

L£TMl-GRM~ ICE't'5 ANOvE'LL 1JllCE1H1S

BPUTYFOIt"" 5PI••••!...

(

PLUCQERSby Jeff MacNelly

•.....•.•..l.R. stone

Tn. ••••..•••••• r..c.

••:''':i:~-:a.,

You're a plllller if you've been driving the••• tnck for 13 years- and

It'l 15,... oW.

CLOSETO HOlE by John McPherson

@

(

CIJ* 10 ••• by John McPhersou

6-

"'m coIlecIIlII for Lany ShumsJd'. get-welllift. WIdcbdonation .hould I put JOU downfw7 H•••• ". $25; nodding acquaintance,

$10; • tIIIdwad scum, $51"

\

.,.., honey, I don't •••• to ••••••• JOII,lilt •••••• 't •••••••••••• 53

- ••••••• '•• CM •••••• 'II ••......" ••••• iL'"

/-,

..•.•••••:7tiif

~'"'JoM~ ..,u.--~~

,

"c•••••• tIIat by the year 2010, we •• 1

•••• '.,. $71,760 for their allowan_ H

..,~

CLOSETO HOME by John McPherson

CLU5E TO HOlE by John McPherson

i~~ I 7-2¥

I '

Twenty-.- years of finding Phir •••••••clippinp .,.. around the house c•••••

in one dorious act of revenge for ••••••

f•~

!i11i

.• Jii

(

•

.,•...... ........,...,"'--- ....•

PW88EIIS by Jeff MacNelly

F•••••• naI $100 per penon,..., ••••.•• offen Go-to-tJte.H.....,.

,tIIHJne cards.

(

You're. pI.ger wtlen your tax refund wit buyYOU two burgers and a coke.

PLUGGERS by Jeff MacNelly

•••••••••• toaI&ht II 15 •••• at OIR'

•••• ..". for $3.95, or for ••• III,..••••• WIItcIdnc,.. WIiIId, .­

••••• for $2.95.H

CLOSETO HOlE by John McPherson I

;5HUI:

SHOEby Jeff MacN elly

ROSE IS ROSE

By Jeff MacNelly

PRECISaV TIE REASONFOR MY QLESTlON.

By Pat Brady

BEETLE BAILEY

IT~ YOURWIFE.ARE YOU HERE!

SHe's USING HER'"r'll GIVE HIM FIVEMINUTES TO GETHERE" VOICE

By Mort WalkerHe'LL BE THEREIN TWO MINUTEt;,MRS. HALFTRACK

By Howie Schneider

~ KlD -.JUS[ STARrED. AU) t£'S MA!((PJS MIWQ\lS

ROSE: IS ROSE by Pat Brady

14'< ~ QESI&e& ~ 'ICW. PJ1J( .

~ ral RSSlOMAaEft.UTQ4'UM 219

." FU£L. /

-WIZARD OF 10

'_.

ROSE IS ROSE By Pat Brady

PEANUTS by Charles M. Schulz:'

By Howle Schneid.

~ SPODI ARAeiAkJ SH8t:SHAVE:JU5T"51~£D M(Q1~lJ?RDAkJ Fa< kJlkJE 6WOIJOOLLARS AklD A eAlJk IAJ

~11'2..£RLAkO

ARE: t,IoU GOING 1b EATALL F1VE:or U~? COUNrWt'lU ME:-- ONE... TWo. ..

SIR, Tj.4E ANSWER15 II TWELVE::

IIZEBRAS"! I'LLSAl( .'ZEBRAS /I !

INO, MAAM, BUT ICAN MAKE AWILD 6UE5S ....

EEKANDMEEK

MJD ~O\,U <1J 1l1E:1f.JT£RkJATlOJJALSPORTSS'aJG. ,"

BEETLE BAILEY

Y'KNO\y' THE GENIUSESWHO MADE BOXES, SAGS,

CANS AND 80TTLESA~E TRUE J-fEROE5!

I WJ-fEREWOULD I BEi WITJ-fOUT THE6E. J GREAT INVeNT'ONS~I

~

By Mort W.lke,

50 POUND5LIGHTER

by Charles M. Schulz'1-/6

PEANUTS

WE WERE BEHIND

FORTI( TO NOTHING!DID WE QVIT? NO!

WE DIDN'T KNOWT~E MEANING OFT~E WORD ~Q.UIT"!

by Charles M. Schul~

WE LOST T~E GAME,AND LEARNED TI4EMEANING OF T~EWORD "QUIT" !

ICKby Rich Moyer

~,.:r=.- ••••.••.Inc.-----By Howie Schneider

~._-

by Young and DrekeDAr:lN RIGl-li! AL.L.iHAi MONEV,

'lOU GEi TO DRive -:/A TRUCK,ANDIi'S A GI<EAT

WAV"TO MEET

'ltQY,EN .' ()

".

--~----------

11-lE:ANNOYINGEIGl-m-I DWAJ2rWAt;, ~E:N'rt1At-LY

LET GO

:5LOrt..,.1Oo

: MV DAD READ IN TI-lE PAPERiMAT GAR8/lGEMEN AREMAKING AI.MOST$50,000 A'fEAA. !

1-13

IF WE GOT ON A PLANEAT MIDNI6~T, WE COULDBE IN PARIS TOMORROW ..

I ~AVE I=II=TI(CENTS.•MAVBewe COULD 6ETUPGRADED TOBUSINESS CLASS

... ~OlJRTEEN

'(EARS!

l:Sy~nrlstsro ••.••

.by Charles M. C

Bv Brant Parker and Johnnv H.rt.

DON'T FOR6ET;J'LLBe TWEN1Y- ONEIN ANOTI-tER ..•

I DON'T f.tAVETO STAY I-IERE

I KNOW W~EN11M NOT

WANTED!

I

ro ~ RE:ALlZE. lHERf:ARt OIJLY A ll-bUSAu)CSft)R'IlX5 [)A,iS l£FT IlJ1J.\ts MILLElJkJl(.M'1

PEANUTS

WIZARD OF 10

we &Avl?ffT llfl~ MAN ~eA"'NG INTO~ PeAr4UT VBNDING MACHINe:

EEK ANITMEi;n.

- AGAR THE HORRIBLE -

oo

By Chris Brown.

"rA~"~

by Young and Drak.

oev'OUSl-Y- YOUR WIFE. DOESN'T NEED

~E 8001<

ANDT~AT 6REAT I DON/To 6AMEW~EN '<Oll REMEMBERi GOTHITON T~E T~AT ..

~ ~EAD 61( A y:JI FU( 6ALL.. 0 jo .,. 0 0 ~J 0 ~~":",:' D Q , ~i • ..,.:< •• 0 iflit 0 0 ~1 060 0~ ..o ii ~ . -....- __~ 0 0 0

o

FORTI( TO NOT14IN6, TWENTl(

TO NOTHIN6, F=1t=Tl(- THREE TONOTHING, SIXT'f TO NOT~IN6 ..

ao 06

~ CALLiUlt; OUR"CAI1LE" ME:NU. ITCON£1S1'Sor nrTY

ADDITIONAL~E'E:~,"11-{AT ALL

~A~E: b>LAND.

o (} I0 0

~ .....; •• ..~ 0

o 0, ". :'-0 ~, :;---1, 0o - •...•... , <J .§-" - ' f 0- - ----- -- -=-- 2•./0 I

BLONDIE

WHAT A GREAT TITI..E •.• "7'I-I1NI<

FAST AND SAVE MQ1VEY.':.HERE'S A 8001< 1~ REAl..I..Y USE!

~

MA\:iAH THI: HUHHltsLt:.

M'< PITC~ERI5 MOUND MAl(BE COVERED WITI1 SNOW, 60T

THe MEMORIES ARE STILL HERE ..

------------------------~------------------------------------- -

HAGARTHEHORRIBLE By Chris Browne

TrI/& 16 7jfp Flme-rrl WHY [;btJ'T r-lo Hf!= GS"'~ CJZ.,A,..,~y ....C7I<fJ66 ..I~ 7121P17 o,v/ yOU ,A~,"," WH~NH~~ A\NA~Ne17 . l'

,.r J~-r CAtJ'rPlfC{I7P/ yol.J~ 6UC7C7E:N/..-Y ~.~~J·41J6~AtJO y? ~ ~~1'11-'..z..;

-- - .. --- ---

FOX TROT by Bill Amend

•••••.• E1J) by Jim DaVIS

~UIU\rll:.LU oy JIm uaVlS

i, •. "

'... ()tIC1CtIlATE. '. DAHc;!

· ,"";1

'~(77"\A"

-----------

- CHECICMATE:,CHECkMATE.

I

~r\._MAN.'

L

American DiplvmaticItnl101W1llent in Asia,Past &nil Present, Since(anet Inc1udiDg) WorletWar One

With an ErnphuiS onTrad.e, Military ancl

1Humu Rights Issues.but by ~ Means Lim­I itecl. to Those IssuesI(I~t as1'heyMight Be) DuringI~This Time FerioclPreviously Metltionecl

I A!o

An Essay byPeter Fox

I'M ASSUMINGlliE TITLE rM

COUNTS 1bWMO 'lbU DlDH"THE SOO WottDS. 1*UIDl"

\ MIIlOll•••••••

, c

I I

8'll

JOHN MCPHERSUN

;;; 1991Jonn McPh.rsonJDlsi'. ..eru] PressSVndlc.lt8'Z5

CLUSE TO HUME

~ fl'X111:(l0}(2rv~OITJlV!Jer~. (CY71

CLOSE TO HOME JOHN r~PHERSON

E-mCJ// ..C/oseto~comeuserve.('om ~~t'.l<

"Well, what'd you expect?! I've been telling youfor two years that we need health insurance:".

C 1997 Jonn McPhtr'lOl\lThsl bf t'mlf't'floll Prn, $y'wli/;.•I. wwwurlpresscom K,RFIt.

'pQ&erve.( WWW.UIlpr-'- 2-Nl

.~ .

WUMPI.~---'-""'I

WU~p! ~.~-WUM~-

'. _.-C,·~_· ."

.~?!~»~ :t..:.=-;-.~

III'-l:I

...::J~

.~ _~. ~ ·..1.. ' ._~. ~~~:"" _~ ..~~/ .....- ....I-. 1.~.

M~

......... ~,

. I-~

"The salesman told me he caught 23 northernpikes in less than an hour while swimming

In a pair ~t thes~!"

"Simple ..1pay them a $5O-a­month protection fee."

~LOSETO.HUME JOHN MCPHERSON~~e.COM _.-.'

LUTMANORTHODONTICASSOCIATES* CONDO IN

ARUBA

II THANK YOU FOR\ HELPING USREACH OUR GOAL!

'0

iji,

I'lCO,OOO -

'lnJ.OOO-

CLOSE TO HOME JOHN MCPHERSON

4:11997 John McPt!,rSOIVDln bv UnlY,rlll Press SyndiCiI' I 9·,

1600.000 -

.200.000 -

1·I"1tIJI:C~~~.com WWW.UI •••• n •. com

"GIanted, the COlt has to stay on for the next 37weeki, but at least this way you can III.

get around."

ICLOSE TO HOME JOHN MCPHERSO?\