The Ghoat That He SawBY JOHN 8WINTON.

Ab i have never been a reader ofghost stories, I cannot say whether auyoxpenoD.ee like jthat of which I amabout to tell has ever fallen to tho lotof any other mortal.

shortly before the American CivilWar broke out, forty yea. b ago, I Wasliving in tho South, at the picturesquecapital of the»»L'almetto St ito." Whatkind of a place the city cf Columbiamay now be I cannot say, for the oldcity of the uame that 1 once know wasburned during the period of hostilities.But, when 1 lived thero, the Curolin-iaus always extolled their capital andwere proud of its fame as the mostbeautiful cilv iu tho Sörth.

I bearded' at tho Mansion House, alarge and ralber stalely doinicilo nearthe bead of Main s'.rcet, not far fromthe broad avenue on which stood theresidences of the plantation aristo*cracy, who were tbe owners of herdsf negro slaves. It was a typical

Hpouthcm domicile of tbe kind thatVised to be raised by tho plauters ahundred years ago. In front of it, andon both of its oides, grew stately oldtrees, which embowered aud shaded it;tho pillars at its entrance were festoon*ed with evergreens; the balcouy waslike a flower garden. From my win¬dow I saw tbe palmettos and magnoliaswhich grew in the court; I paw also afig tree, the ripe green fruit of whichwas a dainty that I sometimes pluckedat sunrise, ere yet Ueorge, a watchfulyoung slave of the house, had got outof his cabin, and while yel his ownerwas dreaming.The master of the Mansiou House

was a grim old .* Colonel" of Irishbirth, who had formerly served In theforeign wars of the British army, andwhom, after these in my years, I re-member only as a choloric veterau atonce iron handed toward tho slaves ofthe establishment and indulgent to¬ward (he members of his family.

There was a social commotion in theColonel's household one autumn day.Word had been unexpectedly receivedthat some friends of. the family werecoming up from their plantation onone of the Sealslands, where tho longstaple cotton grows, to spend a weekwith the Colonel's people at Columbia;

l and the thought had suddenly enteredtho head of the Colonel's wife thatthere was not room to spare for all ofthem at that time in the MansionHouse.Thoro was something like a domestic

panic, and it came suddenly, withoutwarning; for the visitors from thecoast were to arrive by the eveningtrain. They had to be made welcomewhatever happened. No apology forlack of accommodations was to bothought of. For " Southern hospita¬lity " in the ante-bellum days was al¬ways ready for any emergency; it sur¬mounted every circumstance.One of the Colonel's daughters, who

seemed to be in much distress, sentword to me that there was somethingof an unpleasant kind which I, as afriend of the family ought to know." We are in a slate of perplexity," sheaaid. She then told me of the situa¬tion in which the household was placed,and how the embarrassment bad arisen.Her lather had talked of going quietlyto a hotel for a week, but the visitorswould surely hear of it, and be uneasy.He had also spoken of staying for somenights in an old haunted house, longdeserted, which stood beyond a clumpof woods within sight; but he, tho anold soldier, waa very nervous, and gotso alarmed lest he might see the whiteghost always there at midnight that heyielded to the remouslranees of hiswife. All the other notions that cameinto his head had to be abandoned forone reason or another. The visitorsmust not know that the Colonel's fami¬ly had been put to any trouble on theiraccount.

As I had previously heard of thehaunted houso, tho I had never seenit, I told tho Colonel's daughter that Imyself would like to offer relief bystaying there for a few nights, as I wasnot afraid of ghosts, and did not be¬lieve in them.My öfter was promptly and gladly

accopted by the Colonel, and myquarters in his mansion were madeready for the visitors in time for theirreception that evening. The perplexi¬ty was ended.

In the afternoon of the day of per¬plexity the Colonel told Black Georgeto carry a cot, a small table, a chair,and a candle to the haunted house, formy nee. As the ghost was never seenthere in daylight, the slave was notafraid.About ten o'clock that night I left

the mansion and set off in the direc¬tion which George pointed out, saying"Bight up thar,' Massa," as he giggledin the manner of his wooly-heodcdrace..

I took with me a lantern, a pistol,and a novel. Ho, with a stqut heart, aArm tread, and a disdainful air, I mademy way along a time-wot n path,through the clump of woods, beyondwhich I now taw a lighted candle iniho abandoned house, which was saidto be haunted.

It was a rickety old two story wooden^rookory which, as I had learned, was¦Ma^^homo of a slave-trader, butiMttgp occupied for near-1

¦kor since the time¦kdreadful murder

Hkuhost of whom.Bays appeared^fflWiuhu^ht, robedH plenty of storiesBy had been scurcdHBR^ie biding in theB^KajMr^Mrd the wall-

¦tt^ftbe &&A hills,¦fcriMving their^when

all, I should Boo a ghost, I would shootit on tho spot.The moon shone aloft as I approach¬

ed the haunted house- some time afiortou o'clock.

Near the place, which was allcluttered up, thero were stumps of deadtiees, woatherbeateu logs, tangledweeds, stones, boulders and rubbish.I saw, too, that thoro wore rats and hadbeen told that thero voro bats. Ablack grimalkin prowlod aud mowed." Silence brooded," as tho poet says.The old Congarco ltlver rollod sofily.Thuro was no other house, in sight.Tho town lay off aud scorned as if ahundred miles away.

I noticed that ono sido of the descrt-ed house stood slant, that the frontdoor of it was badlv batiorod. that lifopauos of glass4 in tho windows werobroken and bosmudgod, that tuauy ofthe old clapboards wero rotted off, andthat everywhere there woro wrack,spider wobs, thortfs nnd confusion.The place was musty. Il looked dismal.Jt was forbidding.

f. doubt whether I would over havethought of staying ihcr', oven for anight, if I had known all about it be¬forehand.Black George, who had gono with

mo so tar, told, mo that ho had " shookout " tho place, had Used up every¬thing, and had made a shakedown forme on the second elory in a very nicoroom.About thin ti.no tho darky becaxo

uneasy. He was shivering. Ho pala¬vered aud laughed. " Do yo' hoar dateater-wauling, Massa ?" ho atked. Holooked up at the moon. Suddonly holau off through the woods and weedstoward the Mansion IIouso of hismasterj anxious to got to hie. cabin ofsafety before midnight.

44 De Lawd save yo I" ho cried, as hestruck out aud off4Hot no delusion for mo! Away with

humbug I All darkies aro superstitious;they see invisible tbiugs at night.

I entered the haunted houaa andclimbed the rickety stairs to tho secondstory. Here I saw my toom, in which,as I noticed, there wero a front wiu-dow aud a rear window, tho former onaline with the shaky bulcouy. Theplace looked as if it might suit mo, andbe comfortablo enough. The tallowdip was lighted, and stood on a smallboard tablo, near which a chair hadbeen set. As for tho shakedown, itwas all right. Thero was a log lire onthe health, somo of tho smoko fromwhich went up the big broad chimney,which was heavy with ancient soot. I'opened a closot, and thero, in a corner,lay a few withered bones which lookedlike tho relies, of a lost lifo. I was notalarmed by tho sight. My reasonserved me then, as it had done hoforo.It was time to bo level-headed. Foolerywas out of place.Already, as I stood beforo tho fire,

in sight of the shakedown, glancingabout, I began to feel drowsy. I re¬solved, however, to stay up for yot anhour, or even till midnight, that Imight find out for myself whether thehouse were certainly bauntod, and thatI might put an end to tho foolish ghoststories, a hundred years old, which hadfor generations scared evorybody, es¬pecially the -darkies, of whom therewero many thousands in Columbia.

I made up my mind that, if a ghostshould appear when the clock strucktwelve, I would send a bullet throughits head.

I sat down in the chair, and beganto read the novel that I had broughtwith me, and which lay on tbe tablebeside my pistol. Tho very unit pagocaptivated mo, and I was suro that Iwould pass a tranquil hour in followingthe plot. After a while Hooked at mywatch. It was not far from midnight.I turned over the leaves of tho novel,the opening chapter of which I foundto be very fascinating.

. I soon had a strange feeling. I bo-came conscious of the presence of somomoving or fluttering thing. It did notteem to be of human kind; it was of anunnatural character. A shiver passedover me. Dut, as I had heardthat there were bats about tho oldhouse, I thought that perhaps I hadbeen stirred by the fluttering of one ofthem.

I continued to read the novel. Isaw that a few moro ticks of my watchwould bring me to tbe miduight hour.The tallow candle tlickored. When Ilooked toward tho battered window Inoticed that the moonlight was ob¬scured by a heavy bank of black clouds.

I looked again. My eyes wereriveted, for there, on tho edge of thebalcony, peering through one of thebroken panes of glass, stood a sheetedghost, a skeleton in white, grinning atme.Fluck is the thing at such a moment.

I had lots of it..In a cautions way, I laid hold of my

pistol, rose to my foot, set aside mychair, and advanced toward the frontwindow. The ghost was out of sight.As I stepped back io my chair near

the tablo, I again saw the. solf-same«;bost at tho rear window, with ravagedace pressed against ono of tho panesof glas».'

I was sore in a moment that it wafcthe faco of a woman. Her lips moved;she was gibberiug; she would spoak tome. She beckoned to mo with horbony hand. Somehow, at that instantshe reminded mo of a corlain youugwoman of another timo, who, after ifallen in love with her, turned fromme, married another suitor, and killedherself.

1 took Homo otops in the direction ofthe flibbertigibbet,, who now sprang'off and away in a U tah, aeemlugly to¬ward ndnwi that loomed up in thesky. But instantly I saw tho ghoatagain at the frontrwindow, standing onthe dilapidated balcony. X turned myhead, and it then looked in at the roarwindow- It wan to be seen, almost aithe same instant, at both of the win&4pws; but it was approachablo at nolth-

¦wNfthem,^^jas bewildered.It buy© that tho abandoned^indeed, haunted by theB^^oman who hod boonfe^hu wired years bo

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The chair on which I had boon sit¬ting fell. Tho tablo tumbled over.Crack! wont tho pistol, which had beencocked." Good mornin' Massa!" cried Black

George, who bad come to tell mo thatbroakfast was roady up at tho MansionHouse.To my wonderment, I saw that the

morning sunshine flushed tho world.It was broad daylight. I had fallenasleep iu tho chair soon after I satdown in it at ten o'clock the previousnight, and had slept there till morning.I bad not road even one of tho pagesof the novt 1 which now lay on theil )r. I had sc. mi never a ghost, otherthan tho nightmare, at tho window atmidnight.Tho logs in tho liroplaue wore burn¬

ed to ashes. Tho tallow dip was out.Tho pistol lay near the novel on thelloor. Tho mocking bird sang in theclump of woods.

44 Do folks is a-waitiu' fo' ye!" saidBlack George. 44 Bacon an' eggs, cof¬fee an' corn dodgers is on do table; an'I'll tote yor things."It was at Columbia, tho capitbl of

tho old Palmetto State, in tho year bo-foio tho war, that tho affair of whicha narrative is here given occurred.

After its occurrenco I mado no self-stultifying attempt to shaltor tho ghoAtstories that clustered around tho aban¬doned here, which, I may say, has notbeen haunted of laic years, for it wasburned by Sherman's army oarly intho year 1805.

I spoke, not a word to tho Colonel,or to any one elso, about the terrifyingexperiences of that spectral night.Not a soul alive over till this time hoardof them from me.But you may bo euro that I never

slept another night in the hauntodhouse behind tho clump of woods,which had been abandoned evor sincethe night of the murder of a womanthen; a buudred years ago.

A Vkry Surkwd Play..It is toldin Washington that Sonator Welling¬ton of Maryland, whose party status isquite as uncertain aa Senator Mel /m-rm's, forced recognition from tho Re¬publicans and could havi secured itfrom the Democrats, by a vory shrewdplay. Whenth) distribution of co .mi tie places svas under consideration,according to tho story, Wellington wasnotified by the Republicans that noprovision would bo made for bim.Thereupon he asked Senator Jones,the so-called leader of the Democrats,what ho might expect from that sideof the chamber, and was informed thathe could not expect Democratic adop¬tion. Ho announced to the lenders ofboth parlies that, since, in his situa¬tion, his usefulness to his Stato hadpractically departed, ho would at oncetender his resignation to the Governorof Maryland, who, he understood,would appoint as his successor formerSenator Arthur Pue Gorman. Thiscaused a great Hotter. Tho Republi¬cans have a wholcsalo fear of the as¬tute Gorman, and had no stomach 'orhis presonco in the Senate at this ses¬sion, IIio prospect of his appearance atthe next session being sufficiently dis¬turbing. Jones, for his part, saw hisleadership of tho minority- imperfectand impotent as it is.departing im¬mediately upon the appearance ofGor*man, and be was in no mind for this.Bolh the Republican and the Demo¬cratic loaders, therefore, revised theirdeclarations to Wellington and' fromeach side ho was assured that commit¬tee places wotlld be found for him.Ho chose the assignment of the Republicans." The few have no right to the lux-]uries of life while the many aro denied

its necessities," Bays Elizabeth CadyStunton. There, is a good deal of truthind wisdom in this, but in view of thefact that the system has boon in voguesiuco the beginning of time, we don'tsee lust wnat wo are going to doabout It.

The German Empress has tho finestpearl, necklaco in existence. It con¬tains three world-famous necklaoes.One of them formerly belonged to thoox-Quecu of Naples, and anotheradorned tho imago of tho Virgin oiAtakha. The entiro necklace is Jsaidto be worth $600,000.

Bays a rural editor: " Owing to theovercrowded condition of our columns,a number of births and deaths wereunavoidably postponed, this week."

CASTOR IAFor Infants and Children,

The Kind You Have Always Boughtl^eari tha fTX ^//1T%°+ si "

BLTyl, AIIP TAX/K8ABOUT CHRISTMAS.

He Gives the History of the GreatAnnual Festival.Old FatherTime's Problem.

Atlanta Constitution*Nearly sixteen hundred years have

passed since Christmas was first celo-bratod by Christians. During all thesolong conturies thoy have not failed tomeet somowhere and pay revcrouco totho day that somehow was chosen astho birth of tho Saviour. It is not ntall ccrtaiu that tho 25th of Decemberwas Iiis birthday, but Unit dors notmatter much, so that (lie Christianpeople obeorvo eomo day and showtheir gratitude. Iudecd, (ho Greeksand the llucsiansstill eclebrato tho ßihof January and call it Christmas torthoy have never yet adopted tho nowoalondar established by Pope GregoryXIII in tho year 1C82. Now, it is im¬portant for tho young people and manyof tho old ones to know that for nearlysixteen conturies old Father Timo hasbeen gaining a littlu every year on thoexact timo that it takcB tho earth to goround tho sun. This gain bad amount¬ed to about twolvo days, so tho Pope,who wan a great and wise man, issuedhis mandate that timo should bo sotback, and it was sot back. »AÜ the Hornau Catholic countries

conformed al once to this new dato,but the Protestant couutncs woro jeal¬ous of tho Pope, and so Germnuywould not conform until tho year 1700.Great Britain and Ireland refused toconform until the year 1752, aud thoAmcricun colonies put .it off a fewyears later. Greece aud Russia havenot conformed yet, bnt they will.They are getting tirea of having toput two dates to all thoir letters andcommercial transactions with othorcountries. When General Young wasour consul at St. Petersburg nil hisletters that wero written homo hadtwo dates tbat woro twelve days apart.One ho marked "N. 8.," for new stylo,and tho othor "O. 8.," pfor old stylo.England had to abandon anotherraeasuro of time, for until about twohundred years ago tho new year begauon the 25th of March. Somo coun¬tries began it on Easter day.

1 tell you, my youug friends, old Fa¬ther Timo has had a porplexing prob¬lem to keep his calendar straight. Thoday u8edlio begin at (5 o'clock in themorning. Tho week began on Mon¬day. Tho Jews had twelve lunarmonths of twenty-eight days, andovory third year had thirteen to makeup for lost lime. For centuries thorowero only ten months in tho yearamong tho Greeks and Hornaus, andFebruary had thirty-six days just likeull the other montho. Hut popes andemperors rulod tho civilized world,and changed tho measures of time tosuit thoir own whims. Tope Gregorywas a 8cnolar, a mathematician and apromoter ot public education, and heknew ;that tho calendar was wrong,und was getting moro so every year.It was a bold stroke of power, but howas backed by all tho groat astrono¬mers of Europe, and ho set tho clockback, and it stands.But what about Christmas? It has

to bo written about ovory timo itcomes round, for thcio is a now gener¬ation of youug people coming on ovoryyear, and they must bo taught to knowas much as thoso who are older. Thisis the most important event that cv, rhappened in tlio history of tho world,and every man and woman and everyboy and girl who cau read should boas familiar with it as thoy oro with thespelling book. The word " mass"docs not literally mean birth. Itmeans ««dismissed," and came into usobecause after any servico in the Ro¬man Catholic church tho priost wouldsay the congregation is now dismissed.In Latin, it is >' mass." Hence, therewas high mass and low. mass and can¬dle mass und Michael mass and Christ¬mas.a dismission and benediction af¬ter worship.For two or threo centuries after

Christ His followers had so many upsaud downs thoy could not establishholy days or feasts or festivals, bomoemporors wero kind and tolerant andsome were cruel aud persecutedthem. Daring the reign of the Em¬peror Diocletian the Christians ofHomo determinod to celebrate Christ¬mas in their own church where theyhad been permitted to worship, butDioclotian had taken a great disliko tothem, and after the church was full hosent soldiers there and locked thodoors and set flro to the building andburned them all alive.men, womenand children. The wretch died soonafter, but it was many yoars boforeChristians dared to celebrate Christ¬mas again. This was about the year810. Hut the utmost efforts of kingsand emperors to extinguish Christian¬ity tailed. The more martyrs, thomoro Christians. They seemed tothrive on persecution, and hence itwas said that" the blood of tho mar¬tyrs is tho seed of tho church." Justthink bow much we have to bo thank¬ful for in this age and in this land ofreligious liberty. Mo martyrs, no per¬secution, no inquisition, but evory rannand woman can worship Ood accord¬ing to thoir own conscience, with noneto molest or make them afraid. Theturrets and spires of beautiful churchesadorn our land in every city, town andvillage, and aro a silent guarouteo ofgood will and protection to evorystranger th^^a^

Claus and his reindeer, for lie is sup¬posed to bo a great ami good old manwho loves them nud is wonderfullyrich. His Russian name is St. Nicho¬las and his Dutch name is Kiiss Krin¬gle, and for fifteen hundred years hahas been kuown as tho patron saint ofall good childrou. Ho is no myth hutwas a veritable bishop in his day, ai.dwas not only devoted to little children,but look pleasure in helping youngmen and maidens t» mate and marry.The mistlotoo feature of Christmascame down from him, it is said, ami ifa young man and maiden will plighttheir troth, that is, become engaged onChristinas day while standing under amistletoe bough, they will never for¬sake their lovo nor bo divorced.This in enough for mo to write about

Christmas. The book4 have manypretty stories and poeniB about thisever memorable day. The most beau-Itiful and impressive of them all is theono Written by Clement 0. Moore, be-ginning M 'Twas tho night beforeChristmas/' Tho next best is by aVirginian lady, " IyhIo Fe.stetits."Her maiden name, was Nccly, but sbofor soiiio reason swapped it off for some )outlandish jaw-brenking name thai ldon't understand. Her poom onChristmas is an exquisite gem. Tholast jorso says:

" Let nono unchristniasscd go,Lot nono from auy doorUnwarmod, unfed.No kind word saidIIolplcBS bo turnod awayFor Tbino own sako wo pray.

Thnt is tho best part of Christmas.making others happy.and if 1 was alaw-maker 1 would make iho wholeweek a holiday and givo a good dinnerto tho poor and even to tho prisoners injail. Aud nobody should dun anybodyor write a dunning letter to disturb histranquility. I received one this morn¬ing. Tho clans huvo begun to gatherat tho family mausion and the ma¬ternal ancestor is happy, and trips herlight fantastic toes all over'tho house.It docs uot cost anything to run Christ¬mas at our house, for tho childrenbring their rations with them, and oneof the far-away boys writes: 44 Hireanother servant or two at my expense.I don't want daddy to havo to bring inwood and coal any more, and I want aSunday dinner every day in tho week."

Bill Aiip.

FROM A BACHELOR'S VIISW.

Marriages aro not always unhappy,l'euileiico nearly nlwnys peeks be¬

tween tho lingers which h holds to itsfaco.

Engaged peoplo aro always in otherpooplo'a way, but not so much as otherpeoplo aro in their wny.Tho wonu>n who sheds tho most

tears in tho theatre where tho horMnois pursued by wieked blander is tho onewho pulverizes tho reputation of hernearest, neighbor tho next day.About tho timo a man has ono foot

in tho grave from old age ho begins totalk about us boys.Women like to go to Turkish baths

becauso they learn so many truthsthero about other women's feot.A woman's way of being extremely

nico to a callor whom sho wants tolike her is to let her hold the baby fora minuto.A woman can always tell when a

man is in love with hor by tho way shethink i ho pictures her to himself stand¬ing in a great shining light.

If a man id only careful to carry awoman's picturo and lock of hair in*sido of his waleh-casc he can treat hormoat any ways and sho is suro it is asign of bi3 love.Being happy is mostly not being un¬

happy.It's tho cook who c.ui understand

best why tho man of tho houso who isdead is tho happiest.

Usually there is discord in the heartsof tho church choir, howover muchharmony in their voicos.Some women have ^ot to quarrel

with their husbands if tho only reasonthoy cau find for it is that ho isn't quar-rolsomo enough.Thero is charity for sin, but none for

sinners.* It takes nino tailors (o mako a man,but one woman can break him.Wbeu you heat a girl over twenty-

live say sho would liko to sec a manwho could manage her, it is generallya sign that she would.When n woman has a secret to kocp

sho seems to think tho only way shocan do it is to get somebody right awayto help hor..Now York Press.

During tho year 1000 tho coal minceof Montana produced 1,003,773 ton«of bituminous coal. Tho market forthe most, if not all, of this coal wasfound in tho Mute. It brought to themine owners last yoar tho good roundsum of $2,300,054, ou a capitalizationof #5,700,500. Tho amount of moneyinvested in cool mines was considerablyincreased during tho year by extensiveimprovomonls on various properties.Tho previous annual report sltowed aproduction of 1,357,427 tons valued at$2,130,004. This gives an increase inthe valuo of tho output for 1000 of$238,000.An English paper noloa it as a cu¬

rious lact that although tho eagle isIhe national bird of ihe United Stales,and, therefore, desorving of peculiarhonor, yet, in point of fact, the bird isnearly always ruthlessly killed whenthe opportunity offers. This state-niont seems to bo impressive until itis remembered that whoncver thoyhavo a chauco Englishmen ruthlesslykill tho lion, which symbolizes thegreatness and power of the BritishEmpire.

The Wo»' s GreatestCure for malaria XTot All former Malarial pojaon-

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The antidote8 TONIC.

Malarial poisoning. \for it la JOHNSONaetabotUe&Jfar.

Costs 5« Conti |f |ro-KL ^S*T JH verhlul phrase to cx-. jtisB& Pr«-'s'1 V"' lut'Hty ofEHHHtfdM I mere aesire- ThereBflBBHHHRHHfl are a great

pie wlic think It is asuseless to hope tor health as to cry for themoon. Th.cy have tried many medicinesand many doctor?, but all in vain.A great many hopeless men add womenhavo been cured by tne use of Dr. Pierco'aQoldou Medical Discovery; people withobstinate coughs, bleeding lflnes, night-sweats and other symptoms of dlscasowhich If neglected oV rniskillfuUy treatedfind a futal termination in consumption."Goldeu Medical Discovery 0 has a won¬derful healing power. It increases tuenutrition of the body, and so gives strengthto throw off disease. It cleanses the bloodfrom poisonous impurities and enriches itwith the red corpuscles of ltfntth. It {snot a stimulant, but a strength giving medi¬cine. It contains no alcohol, neither opium,cocaine, nor any other narcotio.Sometimes the extra profit paid byinferior medicines tempts the dealer tooffer a substitute as "just as good¦ as "Dis¬covery." It you are convinced that "Dis¬covery " will euro you accept nothing cl»c.«I was lu poor health when I commencedtaking; Dr. Pierce'a medicine," writes Mr, HimerLawlcr, of Volga, Jefferson Co,. Indiana. «Ihad stomach, WMuay, heart, and lung trouble.Was uot able to do any work. I had a severecough and hemorrhage of the lungs, but afterusIur your moalcine o while I commenced togain In strength ana flesh, and stopped cough¬ing right away. Took about six bottled of the' Qoldeu Medical Discovery' then, and 'ostnpring I had Ortppe, and It etttlaa on my lumrs,leaving me wltn a severe cough. I had vhciloctor, bat he didn't seem to help me any ; aocommenced your med- ManBn«dne again and look ¦thre« or rour bottles ofthe Discovery niui two BCTtfticMBr "iiifeSvials of Dr. Pierce'a Pul- K Ht\ m flMMBSjlets, and tliut «tralffht- H^'^L./ ^a xs«arencd me up. I feel like Ik Jf^/rC VrnfAn dl/fcrc nt pur son. I Mux ^^»'T\ ^-IffjAgladly recommend your pf--£"nicdlclue to nit suffer- BUBk y> ^era, Ibr I know It cured H ^^^^

ant Pellets cure con- u WSJ yfistipation by curing fta ¦ Wr^^*^(cause. tt^WIiIN A HUMOROUS VKIN

He: 44 So your married life is nothappy? Well, you have my regrets."She: "Oh, I don't need them; Ihave enough of my own.""I wonder why they haven't started

any yellow journals in Cuba yet?'441 don't believe thoro are enoughAmericans there to support one.".Life.44 Do you think a man haa a right to

open his wife's letters?"44 Well, he may havo the right; but 1don't sco how he could have tho cour¬

age.-Tit Hits.44 Man always wants what he hasn't

and fails to appreciate what ho has."41 Yes; that's what keeps tho inar-

ringo bureaus and the divorco courtsgoing."- Chicago Post.

44 I've never been able to save any-thine," complained tho poor man.44 You have probably paved yourself

a lot of worry," replied the rich man..Philadelphia Record.44 A public official," exclaimed theordinary man, heatedly, 44 should be

our servant. Hut is ho?"44 Hardly," ventured the suburba¬

nite. 44 He stays with us too long forthat."44 Don't you miss your husband verymuch now that he is away ?"44 Oh, no I At breakfast I just standhis newspaper up in front of a plate,and half the time 1 really forgot heisn't there.".Exchange.44 SligKens* wife makes him got upand kindle tho flro every morning."44 Well, it's his place to do it."44 Hut that isn't why ho docs it. He

knows she'd make it too hot for him ifho didn't.".Philadelphia Bulletin.

"An' dcnSanty Claus he come downdc chimbly."" ])oan ho git his face all black wif

soot ?""Wal, he doan mind dat when he's

a-callin' on cullud chillun'.".Puck." Do you moan to say that Erastus

Pinkncy sells his vote ?" " No,"answered Mr. Jim Colliflowor: *« Iwouldn't say dat 'llastus soils his voto.Hut he's willin' to hire it out 'casional-ly to select parties." .WashingtonKtar.

"Did you hoar the thundor last night,Emilie?"" No.did it Ihunder?"" Yes, frightfully.""Then why didn't you wake mo?

-You know I can't slcop in a thundor-storml"

** Do you expect to have any seriousopposition to your election next time?"asked his friend." Yes," answered Senator Sorghum," about tho usunl amount."" How much iB that ?""Oh, about $15,000 or $20,000worth."" Is my hat on.?" begin Mrs.Collingwood, when her husband in¬

terrupted:" Yes, your hat's on straight. Como

along, or we shall bo lato."" If it'B on straight it won't do.Wait a minute, till I g > back into the

house and tilt it a little.".Dotriol FreePress.m Doro ain't much sympathy in »Iisword, an' dat's a fnck," said M-ander-

ing Mike. *»t took dat policoroau t'ntomo confldonco. I told him dat 1 hadall de troubles extant.dat I was jes' acollection of sorrows."

»« What did ho do?"" He looked mo over, an' den said it

was about timo for him to tako up acoll ction."" And now that you are through

college what aro you going to do?"asked a friend of tho youthful candidate.

*. I shall study mcdlclno," was thegrave reply of the young man." But isn't that profession already

over-crowded ?" asked the friend."Possibly it is," answered tho know¬

ing youth, 41 but I proposo to studymedicine just the same, and thoso whoare already in tho profession will haveto take their chancea.".Tit-Bits.

j^, lhi * 1 ha Kind You Han Always 8*01

Small crops, unsalable veg¬etables, result from want of

Potash.Vegetables are especiallyfond of Potash. Write for

our free pamphlets.GERMAN KALI WORKS,93 Nassau St., New York.

POINTED PARAGRAPHS.Some pooplo laugh at old jokes be¬

cause they know tboy arc jokes.Just so It is a wedding trip, a womanisn't particular as to tho route.Most of tho songs sung on tho stageby request aro at the request of thosinger.Every timo two girls kiss each other

in public they lmngmo tho men aro en¬vious.A man would doubtless be just as ir¬ritable as a settiug hen wcro ho placedin a similar position.Fewer actors would be out of work if

there wore not so many people ou thostage who aro not actors.An optimist says that pessimists archopeless fools.ltca8on is a man's guard and moral

principle is his safeguard.If you are not up and doing you will

soon bo down and done.Women arc curious about every¬thing; men aro curious only about wo-

men.Homo men get into ollico with veryHille opposition ami get out willi none

at nil.Tho Individual who gets into thehabit of giving way to depression is ontho broad road to ruin.If a mau is a chronic grumbler it al¬

ways makes him happy to lind a but¬ton off his coat when his wife is busy.There is no law to prevent a wo¬man kissing a pug dog.but just thosame it's a mean advantage to take ofthe dog.When a widow makes up hor mindto marry again the selects the man

and then proceeds lo lind out what holikes best to cat.

Where Women Rule..The Uni¬versity of Pennsylvania sends its repre¬sentatives throughout the world inquest of knowlcdgo, and one of themhas been telling recently of an experi¬ence on the Wanamakcr expedition inthe interest of the department of ar¬chaeology to the land of tho llopi In¬dians, in Arizona.

Jn describing some of the curiouscustoms prevailing among the llopiIndians, Curator Cullinsaid the womenare held in higher eslcom ihan in mostIndian tribes, and (hey, rather thanthe men, do the wooing. When a Hopimaiden decides which of tho eligibleyoung men of the tribo sho wishes tomarry, she goes and sits in his houseand grinds corn until bo is sufficientlyimpressed by her industry to marryher.

After the ceremony, winch is anelaborate ono, the couple go to live inthe wife's house. If she tiros of herhusband she can obtain a divorce bymerely throwing bis saddle, out of thehouse. Aftor marriageN tho house,fields, and all their property, exceptthe herds, belong to tho wife. TheHopi's are very indulgent parents.The right of the children to do as theyplea c is never questioned.This certainly is an ideal country for

women who like lo have things theirway, and doubtless the children wouldenjoy regulations < f this kind. This isvery different from all the traditionsabout the treatment of tho womenamong Indians, as they aro usuallypack-horses and tlavcs of their hus¬bands. Some of our Western Stateshave a reputation for easy divorces,but tho llopi plan of tossing tho bus-band's effects out of doors, is bothsimple and summary.Tiik Joy ok OllRlSTMAS,.If tlio

birth of tho Son of God into ourworld wns nn event of such extraordi¬nary interest to tho inhabitants ofheaven that an angelic messenger wasdispatched to announce it to the shep¬herds who wcio watching their llocksby night on tho hillsides near Bethle¬hem, and if " suddenly there was witlithe angel a multitude of tho heavonlyhost" saying: " (ilory to God in thohighest and on earth pcaco and goodwill towaid men," surely tho recurringannivorsaiy of that cvont should boan occasion of gratoful rejoicing onour earth. Mankind have a moreimmcdiato and vital interest inthat advont than tho angels. It is thonecessary precursor to that otherevent.the death on the cross.aroundwhich gather all tho hopes of our fablen humanity. It was a part of thoocouoi.'y of grace that Christ should be" born of a woman, born uuder thelaw, to redoom thorn that wore underthe law," that ho should be born in" tho likenoss of sinful flesh." that inthe same flesh 116 might " putaway sin by tho sacrifice of himself."Tho birth of our Löt^Josub Christ is_that great epoch in the world's histfrom which nil that went beforetlguio and point out. It is thesecond birth, from which its 111tion boriows all its signifyChristian Advocate.No won lcr it is difucullto

Filipinos. Under tho preecrangement it is right .lot)sugar to come in free,tho Philippine articlewithout paying the

Tk# tu-»lall*

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